Winging my way! (to bed, I am dead)

Fishing. It was great to get out on the lake. Well, on the shore of the lake. And the fish were biting. Many too small to take the hook, a few big ones who just chased, and a few medium sized ones we managed to catch. No lost lures or bait, I believe. I had forgotten to purchase a license. My friend asked if I thought it was necessary, or not, and I thought so. We had to waste a good 15-20 minutes doing that. My very bad. Good thing I did though, we were checked after being there just a bit. Gee, doing the right thing paid off in spades and immediately this time. Oh, a lot of mosquito bites too to boot, but that is part of the game. The boys went with, but neither wanted to fish. My neighbor let them reel in some of his fish. It made me feel a bit guilty after having reeled in several and not having thought about the boys, once I realized what he was doing. No matter how hard I tried after that, I just could not get one hooked. Next time, I will do so as well. It helps get them involved in the fun part of fishing until they are old enough to handle and even enjoy the rest of it, I think. He is a good dad, I am taking notes.

We are going to take his boat out some time this week. Life is certainly picking up. Oh, I described the place I visited and walked today. I think he is definitely planning on hunting this year, either bow, shotgun, or both for deer. Plus ducks and maybe squirrel as well. We might have to get some practice in first. I know I will, I just do not want to take shots that should work which do not work. My shotgun is accurate, but whatever brand or type of slug I was shooting just did not have the power it needed. At 85 yards, it should take down a deer. I may have been using a sabot in my smoothbore, the wrong choke, I cannot remember exactly now, and it was my first hunt. But, I will have the right rounds, barrel, and choke should I use one this year. I would also like to check out his bow. I have never shot a bow, and I am a little suspicious of the things. Though, so far, everything I lay my hands on I can shoot competently, maybe more. It is as if I was born to it. Still, the bow is an odd thing. It brings back memories I never had.

What a day! I was up at 6:30ish am, worked up the Queen’s itinerary, got a no-go from my neighbor for the early walk and yet actually went on my own (it has been a while since I have been self-actuating). Then took a two hour jog/walk through the hills in 87 F weather. Came home, made plans for fishing, made that with a decent little walk and the usual travel up and down the bank looking for THE spot, and am just getting home. Nice, THIS day goes down as my most active day in 19 years! I am almost human, or as close as I will ever be to such creatures. I really have a chance here. The trick is to not run and fall or hold back too much. Balance, quaint but I will take that for it’s simple truth.

I have also decided I will be taking engineering calculus III this fall, on my own nickel. If successful, I will then go on and take two general electrical engineering courses in the spring, again, on my own nickel. As well, if successful, I will have all of my engineering math out of the way and have a minor in math from some other extra math work plus the engineering math I have done. If these work, if I breeze through these, I will reapply for VA financials. There is a catch, one major caveat, one self-imposed hurdle. I have decided that, with all else in my life, part time is fine, if I must. Being older, I really might not be able to handle 18 hours of classes a week and the required homework, plus keeping up with the cave, general business, medical appointments, and everything else in my real life, so, fine. However, I will not be using disability services. No extra time on tests. No quiet time testing. No nothing. If I do this, I will do this correctly or not at all. Who knows, maybe I will be able to get up to full time (12 credits) or more. I had expanded to 9 credits and was planning to up that right before the high blood pressure medicine fiasco. Odd as it sounds, it might actually help me to get to Colorado quicker. Do not ask, just trust. As for me, I will or I will not, there is no try.

Oh, I missed church though, so I will have to be up early... Ack, goodnight!

Time

In the time that is left to me

In the moments I find lifetimes,
In the days I find weeks,
In the moment I am lost.

I can not seem to recall
where I need to go.
I think I can get there all in all.

The months become hours,
the years become moments,
how to gauge this thing called life.

I will not be here tomorrow,
I left yesterday.
I will be here always,
it is not a choice.

There is no time left
to ponder my infinite fate.

Another post. I'm hoping they get a bit more exciting before too long.

I just got back from the trail. My neighbor could not go, he had a sports practice with his eldest son. We, his family and myself, may be going fishing and have a hotdog roast this evening. After I am done with this, I will call and see if his wife would like me to pick something up, or get something specific. Shoot, I had better get a fishing license too. I did not end up getting started on the trail until 10:00, so I had lost most of the morning coolness. It was heavily shaded yet sparse enough so that even without a breeze moving the air around it was not too hot. I am not sure how far I went, 3 miles and some more, up to 5 miles is my guess though. It was very hilly but the trails were well placed to alleviate some of that. My clothes are soaked, as I was driving back into town I can see why. It is already 87 F even if it did not feel like it. The humidity is only 41%, not Vegas but not bad for around here. To be honest, I am a little surprised I was able to do that. They had a few benches throughout, and I rested ever 1/3 of the way in and out. I also drained about 2/3 of my camel pack. I actually think I made pretty good time. I move at a decent pace, and actually think slowing down is an irritant and perhaps harder than just pushing it a bit.

I was a little upset that I forgot to bring swimming clothes, towel, and such though. It would have been great to chill a bit before really chilling a bit. The lake is large enough that it keeps some of it’s cool all summer. There is a swimming hole not 4 miles away, right in that trail area. Although it is a weekend so maybe it was best to not go. I noticed a number of fifth wheel campers and an RV or two going into the camp last weekend, so it seems like a busy place. I might have to check it out this coming week a couple of times. If the water is not too bad, it might even save me a shower… Well, probably not.

I did not go off the path, but occasionally I took a good look around to see some angles and get my bearing so I might have a better chance of navigating off the trail. I noticed about a dozen potential deer trails. I even found one doe nestled not more than 25 feet off the trail. The bushes, branches, and all made it difficult to see her. I was a little surprised she did not dart off while I was coming or going. She was a rather mature large doe, perhaps 4 to 6 years old. I saw a fawn briefly through the trees once as well. I also heard some large animal movements off the trail. Since we do not have bears around, I was a little worried (about drug harvesters or such) until I started seeing the aforementioned deer. I am not much of a birder, so do not rely on this, but I saw a bunch of *LBB’s, if I am not mistaken. I did not see a single squirrel though. Maybe they went to a wedding or funeral or just traveled for the weekend? Nuts!



*(little brown birds)

Time to get out of the cave?

Wow, I am sluggish this morning. I think I forgot to take my meds yesterday, that might have something to do with it. Still, I was up at 6:30ish and got the Q.O.D. the items she wanted me to pick up, then packed and to a few stores, then unloaded at her pick-up point on time and in health. I am now trying to contact my neighbor, who indicated he might be interested in hiking that hunting path. He too hunts, and he has two boys I think he wants to train. They are a bit young and not overly enthused, but I think they will come around. They enjoy their pellet gun and once in a while with close supervision, shooting their dad’s .22 rifle. Yea, I have some small envy, but it is of the correct sort. It is incentive to have some of my own, not jealousy, I guess is how to put it.

I rang their number, but no one answered, so I shall go over and knock. He may not be able to go. He had to check with the misses. See, that is where my envy becomes a little bottle-necked. Oh, don’t get me wrong. And she is a sweetheart as I see it, temper, moods, and all as I know her. It is just that honey-do or honey-do-not thing. Although, he is often exceptionally busy and time management must be a nightmare for him, being as family oriented as he is. She actually wants him to get out, if they do not have something else on the schedule. She knows he misses that, he apparently comes from an outdoorsy family. For us transplants, or for this one anyway, it feels like being an oak planted in a four lane highway. Some of this place just does not make sense to me. I have rebelled and rush only when someone’s arm is off, even then it would just be a quicker but steady pace, not this mad rush verging on perpetual panic.

Oh, I am off. Stay sweet or sour, whatever is your druthers. Just do not change too quickly, it is too early for surprises.

My day off leaves me with time to write, so...

Wow is it getting hot here. I’m really going to have to use some caution when hiking, or anything, outdoors. While visiting my mother’s home, I was starting to get tuckered that last afternoon just doing little nothings outdoors. I was worried that I was weak or off, so I asked my Mum about it. She said that it was just fine to be getting tuckered. She is an outdoorsy woman and says some days just suck the juice from your batteries (well, her idea, my terminology, give or take). I just filled my water pack, and water really tastes sweet out of it. I’m really getting excited about getting out and looking around. But a jaunt outdoors today and I realize caution is in order.

I won’t be doing that tomorrow, the Q.O.D. needs a ride somewhere. She uses part of her vacation to do an eco-canoe trip every year, for the last three years anyway. She gets together with a group, and they spend a week picking up debris from the river, banks, and islands. They pay $140 or something and get three catered meals a day (not bad, and she says the food is good), paddle a different waterway each year, and pick up trash on their way. They also have educational opportunities in the evenings (varied, from watching/helping with a bat study including placing the nets, to setting (non-destructive) traps in hopes of finding some endangered mouse, to archeological dig views and talks, and these change, of course, those are just past examples). I do not believe in many eco-stupid things, but this is one I do believe in, even if I would never do it (too big of a group, too left leaning of a group most likely, and I’m not sure I’m quite up to a week long full time event (then again, I am a pessimist at times, hrmph)). I have thanked her for her work. She could have fun and sip pina coladas, sleep, or something equally foolish but fun with her time off. And it’s always very hot when they go, it seems they luck out and pick the hottest week of the year to go. Yes, I have no problem thanking her.

Then again, if where she is going is close, I may just look around from that point. I will need to pick her up around 7:00 am, so it will still be as cool as daylight hours get. Hmmm, might have to head out to that hunting trail I found. It’s too early to hunt there, of course, but as I have said I want to check it out anyway. I’ll just have to see, Saturdays seem to bring out every “nature lover” available and they crowd nature. On the upside, if I go and it’s relatively open, there are two good swimming holes near my path of choice. That would be a great way to cool off after a couple of hours or more of being lost in the woods.

Oh, I showed my mother my blog and how to visit it (good luck with that Mom, ha). Anyway, for her if she figures it out, and of course for the blog… My mother, as I wrote before, did some home cooking while I was home. There were a number of fantastic meals. One of which was homemade authentic enchiladas! She not only made enough for us (and we both thought she absolutely did it to perfection when we ate half of that batch), she made some in bread pans for me to bring home. I shared one pan with the Obfusticattor today, and she was quite pleased with it. The other pan I am hoping to share with some neighbors. After today, I don’t think the enchiladas I have left will be enough to feed my neighbors and myself on it’s own, but with a few sides it might be fine. Dang but I love homemade Mexican food. Oh, it is not hot. My mother does not tolerate such food well these days. But it was spiced flavor correct and contrary to many beliefs, Mexican food is not always hot. Some of it is presented actually bland, and is meant to be (this was not bland, just not hot). As a side note, being more awake and aware this time, I might have stolen her recipe. Though I will make it hot(ter), as I can handle up to and sometimes the habanera itself (dictionary calls it pungent, I’m thinking more like punch in the nose by a steam train, but whatever). The recipe is easy and not easy, and it is hot work, as well, it does take time, but it works so well with so many meats, that it is a great recipe (she used one pound of beef and two pounds of ground turkey, and I couldn’t tell it was not all beef). Works with shredded chicken and turkey too, maybe pork or ground pork too, dunno. Nope, I just do not think it is enough for the neighbors. So, Miss Piggy and myself will just have to have another round of that. Maybe I could do a trial run or two, then make enough for the neighbors if it works out.

Ah, I should mention this. As I write these posts, I really don’t try to organize my thoughts. I just ramble and let you see how my brain works. I do a bit of editing, check spelling and word usage (roughly and occasionally) and organize maybe in the most mechanical sense of the word, but mostly this is just thoughts as they occur. When I begin reporting on the purchasing and testing of gear, I will try to keep that succinct, organized, and professional. I would not want someone buying rock climbing rope and using it in a tree (bad), buying a cooking camp stove when they just want a snow melter/water boiler, or some other expensive or dangerous thing (mostly, the gene pool, like all pools, should be self cleaning).

Back and getting on track.

I got back late last night. I had planned on writing, then unpacking, doing some wash, taking a shower and crashing. So much for plans. I actually spent a couple hours chilling, figuratively and literally, unloaded, started some wash, showered, and then crashed sublimely. I turned off my phone so that I would not be disturbed this morning, as it was about 3:00 am when I finally got into a losing pillow fight with my bed. I was K.O.ed before the first bell. I woke well this morning, but not until around 10:00 am.

So much to catch up on, but I find that I’m not really losing track that much. It all looks familiar. Different day, same faces and stories. Go figure that one, eh. Immigration opponents outnumber proponents ten to one, but all politicians are in the in the “one” department. Of course, there are 10 to 30 million guaranteed proponents of illegal amnesty, and I’ll bet most of them are voters in spite of their “legal” situation. The war in Iraq, despite what CNN and a little less than half the population says, is still supported. President Bush’s popularity decline has nothing to do with it or congressional popularity would not be even lower. Nobody likes politicians except illegal aliens, wait, no they do not either. People are still happy and unhappy, living, writing, and talking. Hmmm, oh, and all that other jazz.

As for me, it was a good week. I got a lot done for my Mom. A half dozen bigger jobs (some of which I needed help or helped others do), a dozen small jobs, a few things she had not realized needed doing, and a few things that just helped her while I was there but would not really be called tasks. Oh, and boy did I get some home cooking! It was some fine food. I also checked her computer, her computer works well. I think she is letting a 14 year old goof on it, which renders it useless at times. She will not change, so she is stuck with what she gets. Bah! She is on this anti-diet coke kick because of an email (rightly most likely though foolish in that I had warned her off the stuff years ago), so I’m trying to get her to go further. I am unsure what is used to replace fat in “fat-free” goods, but somehow I doubt it is a good thing either. Her no-stick pans have scratches in them, so I am trying to get her to go to something else or at least replace them. I am considering replacing her gear but I am reconsidering that, as I do not believe she will get rid of her steel spatulas and cooking spoons, which even the best non-stick will not tolerate and she does not seem interested in change. I tried to talk her into going back to cast iron, but she says it is too heavy for her now. I’m also trying to get her to start walking. I do not think it will happen. As well, in spite of letting me think she had quit smoking, she has not quit. I need to wash my clothes as soon as I get home for that reason, and I do not like having that smoke smell on my clothes while I am there and go into town, smoke is a bit nauseating and depressing on a daily basis. Oh, I did find out about her health. She does not have lupus, she has a much more minor (and imminently treatable) condition. She was put on a very heavy though devaluing-over-time dose as a curative that probably did make her ill. By the time I left, she was spry and ornery again. It was very good to see. She may have a heart attack or a stroke in a week, have an accident, or whatnot and be gone fast for one reason or another (and will soon or late), but if she is living well and enjoying life in the interim, it will be easier to deal with that.

On the flip side of the coin, I think she was a bit surprised at my health. I was able to get quite a lot accomplished. And though I had my limits, they far exceed what she has seen in years, perhaps decades. Not only did I not mind working, I looked for things to do beside the list she had. Some things she might notice, others maybe not. Since I was not always tired, I was also not cranky. I think she is starting to understand some things and have a little faith in what I have told her. Seeing, after all, is believing. And, though not svelte by a long shot, I am in far better condition than I have been for years. I am hoping this summer will see a shaving of some more mass and an overall strengthening and toning of my body. I weighed in at under 280, if by only a sliver, for the first time in about 9 months, but the way my clothes fit says a great deal more is going on than what even the scale says.

My hiking gear is in and fits, so probably tomorrow or Sunday, I will find some of these trails and begin exploring more. A water camel, a pack with a proper snack or two, the raincoat, pants/shorts, a t-shirt, and my Dr. Martins should see me well through many miles this summer. Hmm, and there is the rock wall. It sounded like Fridays were not a good time to be getting training, so I will just go in Monday. Today I am going to chill here at home, get some of this squared away, finish my laundry, and rest up a bit.

Oh, I did make it to church then to my church event that last Sunday. I was on time and ready. I dressed more bohemian than proper, wearing blue jeans, a dressier oxford shirt (button down), brown heavy oxford shoes, and my woolen sport-coat. Not a bad look, considering I begin with a Frankenstein look anyway. Well, I was a bit warm and a bit overdressed. Still, I was comfortable with that and will learn to dress down a bit. As well, I met several people I had not seen for a bit and enjoyed that and mass very much. I met my obligation, and felt rewarded. Mass was fantastic by itself. I saw the first procession and it was an amazing service to me. I am not used to kneeling for that long of a stretch, and kneeling itself is sort of new and not quite yet comfortable, but I saw some humor in this. When I was 18, watching people 1/3 my age out ski me; when I was still in classes and watching people ½ my age out work me; and now watching people twice my age out kneel me, well, it happens. I was so impressed with this Sunday that I will have to switch in at least one Sunday a month, though Saturdays will be my usual. Oh, I forgot to go to coffee hour! Really. I had intended to attend, it seems my feet get carried away before my brain kicked in. That too happens.

It just goes to show, as soon as I think I have it all figured out I realize I do not. I like this game.

Time to go.

I am moving slow, but I have about an hour, assuming a half hour for this post, to get to church. I don’t feel like going, but my feelings are just that, my intentions are more to fact.

She has called twice since our trip, once to make a faux complaint in order to actually mention how glad she was for the trip and to thank me for a wonderful day. This morning she called to see if I was going to take my strawberries (of course, too precious and rare to leave to rot) to my mother’s home. She was looking for a freebie, which I don’t understand as she bought four or six quarts herself. Bah, probably reminding me to take them by poking a stick into my defenses to activate my greed to make sure I took them. But, because of her call, I realized my fish could use some food while I am away. Yep, poking in some honey pots produces bees. So, she said she would feed them if I left instructions. Knowing her, and I do, I told her rather than explicit instructions, I would leave the containers on paper, a paper for each tank and labeled as such, with a sample feeding for each tank. It will have to be a little heavier doses as she will feed them once daily while I usually feed them twice a day, except for my every other day beta feeding.

It looks like Rocky got tired of his pellets. He ate the biggest gold fish in the tank. I sort of saw that coming though. Not that Rocky (a crawdad) had been hungrier for fish, but the big boy (never named him as he was Rocky fodder from the start) had started getting fat and lazy. Now, he is a pile of scales and crawdad poop. I do love Rocky, he knows how to treat food right. Right now Rocky is lazing over in a corner, wishing he could watch a Super Bowl game or something, even a rerun would do after this little thanksgiving dinner. Probably crawdad belching too.

It looks a bit cloudy and it’s rather cool this morning. Good, that is how I prefer it. Well, ok, I am trying to get beyond that. Hmm, maybe I’ll have to go all cheery and like the weather all the time (which I sort of do anyway, in spite of my sometimes stretched sometimes real gloom at times). Ok, I’ll do that but I do not have to act all cheery or admit to it. Yes, that is the ticket. Do not go there, I save some space for backsliding a bit, energy and mood reserves, and just being somewhat ornery, obstinate, cantankerous, and dark. It is not a bad thing. Not one of my favorites scotches, cigarettes, cigars, or lady friends has ever been without serious bite. Even my cats have been, hmmm, in the realm of near feral. Although it seems my past German Shepherds and preferred pipe tobacco reflect my more serious formal smooth lawful ways, go figure.

It is time to move. I will put on 22 ounces of French press espresso and that should hit the “do not touch that button” button. Have a great Sunday. I hope you find a way to give God his dues, as your faith and ability allow. He does not need us, but like any father, it brings him no small joy to see us and receive our humble gifts. I’m taking him my feeble works, attitude, fears, and hopes, and both my good and bad, which will go into the plate with some ducks. He cares for us wholly, even better than Rocky does his fish, no remainders and He is not destructive. I wonder if he watches football?