.
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I have continued to eat. Two inch and a half thick ribeyes put me back in the game. I have been trying to eat enough and yet I always feel hungry. Like sleep, not eating enough will sneak up on you, and like thirst you cannot simply drink enough to rehydrate quickly. When I fall, hydration is sort of cared for mindlessly if probably not perfectly, but food is not. I could eat a lot of food for a lot of days just to get my body back on track. Actually, that would help a good deal.
I have been experimenting with rice and tuna, a lot, lately. Into that I have started adding random cans of vegetables. As well, I have been adding spice. To be honest, heavy and hot works far better than merely savory. Some say savory can include hot, I should add, but not how I see things. Hot is all on it's own to my mind. In any case, a bit of the hottest cayenne I have found, a bit of ginger, some black fresh ground pepper, and salt, put over canned tuna fried in butter, with a good shovel of rice on top, turns into a heavier warming edible delight. I may even experiment with adding allspice or cinnamon.
I suppose what I am trying to say is... food does not have to be fancy to be quite satisfying. Though I actually do not care for beans and rice together, I love having each with various meats. I am not so sure about tuna and beans, texturally at least, it seems wrong. But tuna and rice provides a great deal of good food, nutrients, calories, and such. I could even see it without the butter, but a fat of some kind would always help. And a can of various green or red vegetables filled the plate out wonderfully. Asparagus, spinach, and carrots have been tried so far. Though I am guessing pumpkin, squash, okra, and a number of other veggies might be wonderful too. I just wanted to pass that along. Experiment!
Though I am not messing with haute cuisine much lately, what I do is pleasing, affordable, and within range of my capacities, finances, and the direction I am going. Bon appetit!
Saturday, November 13, 2010
Comparing, if mostly apples to oranges.
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I have been honing the profile of the machine I would like. Advice here, reading there, and comments. I also looked at two companies who will build the machine I am looking for to compare prices. Actually, I would save $1,500 or more building it myself. I was a bit surprised at that, especially since I can order even better components than what are even listed as available at either of the better rated sites I have explored.
Still, when it comes right down to it, for a top machine, and dual monitors, it would come right to about $3,200 or so. I could trim some fat, to be sure. I could easily cut the price to $2,600, losing an extra monitor and just settling the rest down to standard. And, I could probably live with that. I could even cut the thing to, say, $2,200 and probably be just fine and have all the room for upgrades with time. The thing is I actually use this device for much of my life. If it were a trinket or merely a toy, I could see going low and adding later or not. But this is my primary entertainment and actually, at this time, lifestyle. The machine I am using has lasted 7 years. So, $3,200 divide by 7 is $528 a year or $44 a month. And, if I let it go, I can cut all other costs to a bare minimum while I whittle time away and yet without sleeping too much, even in the winter. Not the perfect medicine or means of stowing myself, but not that bad of one either.
Of course, there are some things to consider. The technical situations or processes mentioned all require extra cooling. While air cooling is good, it might not be enough, so I am considering an enclosed (no need to fill) liquid cooling device for the cpu. Even with it enclosed, with no need to fill, I am itchy about that. Dunno, something about liquid and electricity in a small area at the same time gives me pause. As well, getting the cooling systems needed installed well enough to keep the device cool and yet trying to keep the system quiet is yet another trick. My current machine is the Harley of computers. Low, slow, loud, and big. I do not want to repeat that.
I wish I could pass along the list, for advice, but to enroll in Newegg, you have to put in name and town and all that jazz. That is not going to happen. So, I cannot put it on my wishlist and I cannot share the profile. Still, it is a decent rig with some nice features. It is rather upgradeable. Then again, like all machines, it has some flaws. It always come down to this or that, high or low, and what might seem better is not, at least in the short run. In other words, it comes down to whether you like it, whether it will work for what you want it to do, and whether you can pay for it (affordability... huh?). It would be nice to be able to have people look it over and offer advice though. One and a half, two and a half, or even a whole 3 minds is or are... well... better. I think. Unless I am making supper, then get the hell out of my kitchen.
.
I have been honing the profile of the machine I would like. Advice here, reading there, and comments. I also looked at two companies who will build the machine I am looking for to compare prices. Actually, I would save $1,500 or more building it myself. I was a bit surprised at that, especially since I can order even better components than what are even listed as available at either of the better rated sites I have explored.
Still, when it comes right down to it, for a top machine, and dual monitors, it would come right to about $3,200 or so. I could trim some fat, to be sure. I could easily cut the price to $2,600, losing an extra monitor and just settling the rest down to standard. And, I could probably live with that. I could even cut the thing to, say, $2,200 and probably be just fine and have all the room for upgrades with time. The thing is I actually use this device for much of my life. If it were a trinket or merely a toy, I could see going low and adding later or not. But this is my primary entertainment and actually, at this time, lifestyle. The machine I am using has lasted 7 years. So, $3,200 divide by 7 is $528 a year or $44 a month. And, if I let it go, I can cut all other costs to a bare minimum while I whittle time away and yet without sleeping too much, even in the winter. Not the perfect medicine or means of stowing myself, but not that bad of one either.
Of course, there are some things to consider. The technical situations or processes mentioned all require extra cooling. While air cooling is good, it might not be enough, so I am considering an enclosed (no need to fill) liquid cooling device for the cpu. Even with it enclosed, with no need to fill, I am itchy about that. Dunno, something about liquid and electricity in a small area at the same time gives me pause. As well, getting the cooling systems needed installed well enough to keep the device cool and yet trying to keep the system quiet is yet another trick. My current machine is the Harley of computers. Low, slow, loud, and big. I do not want to repeat that.
I wish I could pass along the list, for advice, but to enroll in Newegg, you have to put in name and town and all that jazz. That is not going to happen. So, I cannot put it on my wishlist and I cannot share the profile. Still, it is a decent rig with some nice features. It is rather upgradeable. Then again, like all machines, it has some flaws. It always come down to this or that, high or low, and what might seem better is not, at least in the short run. In other words, it comes down to whether you like it, whether it will work for what you want it to do, and whether you can pay for it (affordability... huh?). It would be nice to be able to have people look it over and offer advice though. One and a half, two and a half, or even a whole 3 minds is or are... well... better. I think. Unless I am making supper, then get the hell out of my kitchen.
Free trade?
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Looking over the topic, and considering this and that, I am still for free trade. Now, whatever you have been told, understand that no such thing exists at this point. Free trade, true free trade, is an exceptional idea. No fees, fines, taxes, or such imposed on the exchange of goods delivered over borders is an excellent manner of trade. There are, of course, caveats.
First, all of what passes for free trade, at this time, is no such thing. The U.S. has simply agreed to using a blindfold and having our nation's hands tied behind it's back in these deals. I think this is being done to encourage manufacturing and other work out of the nation. Whether this is done because of the cost of U.S. workers, unions, or the dreaded environmental lobby, though probably a bit of all of those, is unclear and probably depends more on which government agency, department, bureaucrat, or elected official is doing the pushing.
China, for example, is cheating so heavily and handily that the trade imbalance is impossible. This does bring cheap goods into the markets, while collapsing the eventual ability of Americans to be able to afford even those goods. I have, for many years now, considered why complaints to the WTO have not gone forward. It is because U.S. politicians want what is happening to happen (and perhaps to a minor degree because that organization would not act in our interests in any case). Both parties are getting goodies out of that bag.
One caveat, about even real free trade, is that it would by the nature of how it works eliminate some (possibly great) capacity in the U.S. As is, capacity to produce even minor goods are being lost at a terrifying rate. Honest free trade would only slow that. Without the capacity to produce what we need, we do lower the price of the goods we want. We also make war less and less likely. Then again, enemies while in the middle of wars often trade what their enemy needs for what they want in the most bizarre of schemes (often those who do the trading during the war are chastised after it, publicly, in spite of the unofficial official go-aheads during the war).
The question is whether people want less expensive (at the risk of cheap) goods, or whether they want to live a more humble, less product driven life? As for me, I would prefer to have things made in America and live with less. But what I want and what is are two different things almost every time. Why then do I say free trade is a good thing? Well, that is simple economics, which sets aside national interests, considerations for war, and other issues. The people have to choose and have chosen. Oh, by the way, Chevy is NOT an American company. If you are going to pick American made, make sure you are not simply buying a bill of goods to which there is no real merit. Further, even if something is American made, if it is poor product, sidestep it like you would any venomous snake.
.
Looking over the topic, and considering this and that, I am still for free trade. Now, whatever you have been told, understand that no such thing exists at this point. Free trade, true free trade, is an exceptional idea. No fees, fines, taxes, or such imposed on the exchange of goods delivered over borders is an excellent manner of trade. There are, of course, caveats.
First, all of what passes for free trade, at this time, is no such thing. The U.S. has simply agreed to using a blindfold and having our nation's hands tied behind it's back in these deals. I think this is being done to encourage manufacturing and other work out of the nation. Whether this is done because of the cost of U.S. workers, unions, or the dreaded environmental lobby, though probably a bit of all of those, is unclear and probably depends more on which government agency, department, bureaucrat, or elected official is doing the pushing.
China, for example, is cheating so heavily and handily that the trade imbalance is impossible. This does bring cheap goods into the markets, while collapsing the eventual ability of Americans to be able to afford even those goods. I have, for many years now, considered why complaints to the WTO have not gone forward. It is because U.S. politicians want what is happening to happen (and perhaps to a minor degree because that organization would not act in our interests in any case). Both parties are getting goodies out of that bag.
One caveat, about even real free trade, is that it would by the nature of how it works eliminate some (possibly great) capacity in the U.S. As is, capacity to produce even minor goods are being lost at a terrifying rate. Honest free trade would only slow that. Without the capacity to produce what we need, we do lower the price of the goods we want. We also make war less and less likely. Then again, enemies while in the middle of wars often trade what their enemy needs for what they want in the most bizarre of schemes (often those who do the trading during the war are chastised after it, publicly, in spite of the unofficial official go-aheads during the war).
The question is whether people want less expensive (at the risk of cheap) goods, or whether they want to live a more humble, less product driven life? As for me, I would prefer to have things made in America and live with less. But what I want and what is are two different things almost every time. Why then do I say free trade is a good thing? Well, that is simple economics, which sets aside national interests, considerations for war, and other issues. The people have to choose and have chosen. Oh, by the way, Chevy is NOT an American company. If you are going to pick American made, make sure you are not simply buying a bill of goods to which there is no real merit. Further, even if something is American made, if it is poor product, sidestep it like you would any venomous snake.
I keep looking over components.
.
.
Okay, fine, I might have some understand of women and accessories... until I forget. Still, I do not look over these things obsessively and only once or twice a decade. In any case, my machine is starting to take shape. There are so many things to consider when building a computer. There are hardware, software, and technology options which are beyond if through the other two option types.
For example, I knew I wanted DD3 1600 or better memory. However, if I go with AMD, I have to overclock. While shopping (still technically shopping ^.^ ) I multitasked into research mode. I usually choose Asus motherboards (best, brightest, and most stable... to my knowledge). It turns out that my choice in motherboards makes overclocking rather simple. I even found a site with a video explaining how to do it, if on a cpu and motherboard (same manufactures) from 6 months ago. It is quite easy now. And, should I wish, I could overclock just for memory or push a bit into cpu enspeeding. (Yes, I do make up words, sue me.)
The other technology which has my panties in a bunch is crossfire. That is, taking two powerful video boards and linking them for uber viewing. Beyond knowing how to do that or which boards are best, the simple notion that so much has changed has not escaped me. In any case, a little research here has me back on track, if nervously. Then again, if you are not nervous about building your own machine, and a high end one at that, then you are naive.
Some of the things I am considering are monstrous. Most have heard of the Raptors, but 300 gb at 10k rpm? How about two of those? And those are my slow pokes. I am adding a 100 gb ssd for startup and a few programs. I can easily add another hd if I ever get into pictures or video, a 2 gb monster toss device, or two for storage security, would be little money if I get to that point. My worry with memory is setting up the 300 gb devices. I am not sure whether to set them for response, reliability, or security (or even some mix). And again, I do not know how.
Often, setting things up is paying close attention to fine details. Little switches are all over the various cards and boards. The *Bios also holds many keys and must be used to do overclocking (can overclock the video boards, cpu, and memory, at least) (*the subsystem from which all other systems are configured so as to run before ever getting to the operating system.... yeah, I know... it is confusing and a bit complicated.). The instructions are often... convoluted. Sometimes the instructions really do not exist or are so poorly given that it would be unwise to try to follow them. The internet is the only good source, often, for information and instruction. At least I will have a machine that works from the start.
In any case, the barebones system I have put together is a machine that would last 5 to 10 years, like this one, though at less than I paid for this machine when new (top end) and at least $1500 less than an Intel machine. Then again, though I tried to avoid bare products (those without cords and sometimes even drivers), that is not always avoidable. Who knows what wires, cords, connectors, and other computer giblets might still be needed. Oh, and monitor (or two or three).
I am excited, but... It is a lot. It is still out of my financial range for the moment and a bit complicated even if I could buy everything today. Wait, I think that means that I am a guy. Check. (If it looks risky, if it could cost too much, if it might not be easy to do... well, leave it to men... then sort of avoid watching... sometimes it is really ugly.) Just thought I would do an update.
.
Okay, fine, I might have some understand of women and accessories... until I forget. Still, I do not look over these things obsessively and only once or twice a decade. In any case, my machine is starting to take shape. There are so many things to consider when building a computer. There are hardware, software, and technology options which are beyond if through the other two option types.
For example, I knew I wanted DD3 1600 or better memory. However, if I go with AMD, I have to overclock. While shopping (still technically shopping ^.^ ) I multitasked into research mode. I usually choose Asus motherboards (best, brightest, and most stable... to my knowledge). It turns out that my choice in motherboards makes overclocking rather simple. I even found a site with a video explaining how to do it, if on a cpu and motherboard (same manufactures) from 6 months ago. It is quite easy now. And, should I wish, I could overclock just for memory or push a bit into cpu enspeeding. (Yes, I do make up words, sue me.)
The other technology which has my panties in a bunch is crossfire. That is, taking two powerful video boards and linking them for uber viewing. Beyond knowing how to do that or which boards are best, the simple notion that so much has changed has not escaped me. In any case, a little research here has me back on track, if nervously. Then again, if you are not nervous about building your own machine, and a high end one at that, then you are naive.
Some of the things I am considering are monstrous. Most have heard of the Raptors, but 300 gb at 10k rpm? How about two of those? And those are my slow pokes. I am adding a 100 gb ssd for startup and a few programs. I can easily add another hd if I ever get into pictures or video, a 2 gb monster toss device, or two for storage security, would be little money if I get to that point. My worry with memory is setting up the 300 gb devices. I am not sure whether to set them for response, reliability, or security (or even some mix). And again, I do not know how.
Often, setting things up is paying close attention to fine details. Little switches are all over the various cards and boards. The *Bios also holds many keys and must be used to do overclocking (can overclock the video boards, cpu, and memory, at least) (*the subsystem from which all other systems are configured so as to run before ever getting to the operating system.... yeah, I know... it is confusing and a bit complicated.). The instructions are often... convoluted. Sometimes the instructions really do not exist or are so poorly given that it would be unwise to try to follow them. The internet is the only good source, often, for information and instruction. At least I will have a machine that works from the start.
In any case, the barebones system I have put together is a machine that would last 5 to 10 years, like this one, though at less than I paid for this machine when new (top end) and at least $1500 less than an Intel machine. Then again, though I tried to avoid bare products (those without cords and sometimes even drivers), that is not always avoidable. Who knows what wires, cords, connectors, and other computer giblets might still be needed. Oh, and monitor (or two or three).
I am excited, but... It is a lot. It is still out of my financial range for the moment and a bit complicated even if I could buy everything today. Wait, I think that means that I am a guy. Check. (If it looks risky, if it could cost too much, if it might not be easy to do... well, leave it to men... then sort of avoid watching... sometimes it is really ugly.) Just thought I would do an update.
Somethings done.
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.
I have been cooking, but falling behind on the dishes. I simply do not have a good means of staying on top of things at the moment. Some here, some there, but never quite enough. Then again, I am doing a number of other things as well. Figuring out how to get my game running on this computer, from password to downloads, was a bit of a chore. Still, I have that part completed. I finally, this evening, played for a few hours. Most of that time, however, I was working on rebuilding my characters spell systems, and putting in needed addons. One character tended, mostly... Only nine more to go! Well, that one is mostly ready. The game changes in little ways all of the time, and two or three months out of the loop means a lot of work remains.
I have also been reviewing gaming systems. I am thinking, for my needs, an AMD might be just fine. A quad core system would probably, again, be plenty. But a hex core (6 chip chip, heh!) would offer a longer computer lifespan. And with AMD, it would add lifespan without much financial hurt. A top of the line Intel machine would cost in the range of $3.8k to $4.5k (well, as top as I would go, and probably without crossfire). A top of the line AMD could be had for $2.5k to $3.2k (or less, possibly much less if I build it). Building a machine sounds fun, but the truth is it is a hassle. Warranties cover some things, not human error often. The little pieces and bits do not always (ever) go together well or rightly. A non-functioning end result might be a piece not *gently put in place correctly (*shoved, pushed, kicked, or stuffed where it really does not seem like it should fit), or because some part is bad (their fault, my fault, no one's fault). And, it can take days to weeks to actually construct the thing, assuming you use all the recommended glues, plugs, heat shielding, and such. Anyway, I am thinking this all over. I have to have a new machine before this one, again, burns out, wipes out, or simply dies finally.
Sassy still goes through violent episodes. She is become less nasty, though. Between Sam and I, she is learning that some behavior is simply not going to be tolerated. And yet we have both been rather lenient (in my book). I do have to swat her or near her when she simply will not stop attacking. But I have been cautious not to hurt her. Cats only become more violent when violence is used, seeing it as a part of a game in their wilder natures or seeing it as a method of assertion perhaps merely as the "way of the world". I learned that from my second cat, back in my younger and drinking days. Sam is simply a rock. Other than her vomiting, which is lighter now that I feed her 'indoor cat food' and as well do not feed her for an hour or two after having been outside. She is just a sweetheart. She still does not like the intruder, but I cannot actually fault her for that for a number of reasons.
Well, I suppose I ought to get to bed. Staying up late, again. Oh well. Good night.
.
I have been cooking, but falling behind on the dishes. I simply do not have a good means of staying on top of things at the moment. Some here, some there, but never quite enough. Then again, I am doing a number of other things as well. Figuring out how to get my game running on this computer, from password to downloads, was a bit of a chore. Still, I have that part completed. I finally, this evening, played for a few hours. Most of that time, however, I was working on rebuilding my characters spell systems, and putting in needed addons. One character tended, mostly... Only nine more to go! Well, that one is mostly ready. The game changes in little ways all of the time, and two or three months out of the loop means a lot of work remains.
I have also been reviewing gaming systems. I am thinking, for my needs, an AMD might be just fine. A quad core system would probably, again, be plenty. But a hex core (6 chip chip, heh!) would offer a longer computer lifespan. And with AMD, it would add lifespan without much financial hurt. A top of the line Intel machine would cost in the range of $3.8k to $4.5k (well, as top as I would go, and probably without crossfire). A top of the line AMD could be had for $2.5k to $3.2k (or less, possibly much less if I build it). Building a machine sounds fun, but the truth is it is a hassle. Warranties cover some things, not human error often. The little pieces and bits do not always (ever) go together well or rightly. A non-functioning end result might be a piece not *gently put in place correctly (*shoved, pushed, kicked, or stuffed where it really does not seem like it should fit), or because some part is bad (their fault, my fault, no one's fault). And, it can take days to weeks to actually construct the thing, assuming you use all the recommended glues, plugs, heat shielding, and such. Anyway, I am thinking this all over. I have to have a new machine before this one, again, burns out, wipes out, or simply dies finally.
Sassy still goes through violent episodes. She is become less nasty, though. Between Sam and I, she is learning that some behavior is simply not going to be tolerated. And yet we have both been rather lenient (in my book). I do have to swat her or near her when she simply will not stop attacking. But I have been cautious not to hurt her. Cats only become more violent when violence is used, seeing it as a part of a game in their wilder natures or seeing it as a method of assertion perhaps merely as the "way of the world". I learned that from my second cat, back in my younger and drinking days. Sam is simply a rock. Other than her vomiting, which is lighter now that I feed her 'indoor cat food' and as well do not feed her for an hour or two after having been outside. She is just a sweetheart. She still does not like the intruder, but I cannot actually fault her for that for a number of reasons.
Well, I suppose I ought to get to bed. Staying up late, again. Oh well. Good night.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
But, but, God punishes! Really?
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An email indicated that this notion about freedom can not be true. Otherwise God would not punish us, or leave us to live and die in horrible ways. Really?
First, God does not punish us. Reality does. If we jump off a fifty foot cliff, well, the outcome is pretty much not good. God did not do that. He has made simple that doing other than certain things will bring pain, after we chose the way of pain to begin with. This argument reminds me of a doctor speaking with a patient. The doctor tells the patient he must not drink to excess, smoke, use drugs, and eat to excess. The doctor suggests that any one of those things, but surely all of them together, will lead to health issues. The patient continues in his ways, has a major heart attach, or becomes psychotic, or has a stroke, and then gets angry at the doctor for cursing him. He feels like the doctor has punished him. That is much of the argument, wrapped up simply, regarding God and punishment. He tells us not to do stupid things, we tell Him he is disturbing our lifestyle, we suffer, we blame Him. Really?
He made all things. He knows how things work. He has told us what is good, healthy, right, and will lead to both physical, mental, and spiritual success, and we ignore Him. When things go wrong, we simply blame Him rather than understanding He is not speaking to us as a preacher, an ethicist, a prude, or any of that, but as the architect of all things. He knows what works and what does not because He crafted all things and processes and laws. He actually does know what works and what does not work. Penis in anus? Not so good. A twelve pack of beer each evening? Not so good. Ten women on a sex call list? Not so good. A single woman, with whom a guy is married? Depends on the situation, though if all things are advisable, mostly good with partly annoying skys. Just saying. He knows what works and what does not. Blaming Him for knowing and advising is no different than blaming a doctor who advises. The difference is doctor's work on probability and from within a flawed framework of understanding and capacity. God does not.
Before you blame God for your failures, heartaches, pains, and grief, decide if what you did which lead you to where you are was contrary to His advice. If so, you only have yourself to blame. Though you should look a little deeper. If the bible has any truth to it, you will see that, since we live in a fallen world, your best efforts will not suffice. Not after Adam took the fruit and pulled a stupid, though at least in part thanks to Eve. At this point, the only way forward, and upward, is humbly and submissively. And, like it or not, as woman helped man to fall, only men can help women to rise. Christ being the first of men and a good husband, only after a good priest, next. No one can say He did not tell us so, warn us, and try to teach us even when we ignored Him. He showed us by dying on the cross, and rising. What the heck more do you want?
Just... speaking to the email here. My email is being quirky. Oh well. This should do.
.
An email indicated that this notion about freedom can not be true. Otherwise God would not punish us, or leave us to live and die in horrible ways. Really?
First, God does not punish us. Reality does. If we jump off a fifty foot cliff, well, the outcome is pretty much not good. God did not do that. He has made simple that doing other than certain things will bring pain, after we chose the way of pain to begin with. This argument reminds me of a doctor speaking with a patient. The doctor tells the patient he must not drink to excess, smoke, use drugs, and eat to excess. The doctor suggests that any one of those things, but surely all of them together, will lead to health issues. The patient continues in his ways, has a major heart attach, or becomes psychotic, or has a stroke, and then gets angry at the doctor for cursing him. He feels like the doctor has punished him. That is much of the argument, wrapped up simply, regarding God and punishment. He tells us not to do stupid things, we tell Him he is disturbing our lifestyle, we suffer, we blame Him. Really?
He made all things. He knows how things work. He has told us what is good, healthy, right, and will lead to both physical, mental, and spiritual success, and we ignore Him. When things go wrong, we simply blame Him rather than understanding He is not speaking to us as a preacher, an ethicist, a prude, or any of that, but as the architect of all things. He knows what works and what does not because He crafted all things and processes and laws. He actually does know what works and what does not work. Penis in anus? Not so good. A twelve pack of beer each evening? Not so good. Ten women on a sex call list? Not so good. A single woman, with whom a guy is married? Depends on the situation, though if all things are advisable, mostly good with partly annoying skys. Just saying. He knows what works and what does not. Blaming Him for knowing and advising is no different than blaming a doctor who advises. The difference is doctor's work on probability and from within a flawed framework of understanding and capacity. God does not.
Before you blame God for your failures, heartaches, pains, and grief, decide if what you did which lead you to where you are was contrary to His advice. If so, you only have yourself to blame. Though you should look a little deeper. If the bible has any truth to it, you will see that, since we live in a fallen world, your best efforts will not suffice. Not after Adam took the fruit and pulled a stupid, though at least in part thanks to Eve. At this point, the only way forward, and upward, is humbly and submissively. And, like it or not, as woman helped man to fall, only men can help women to rise. Christ being the first of men and a good husband, only after a good priest, next. No one can say He did not tell us so, warn us, and try to teach us even when we ignored Him. He showed us by dying on the cross, and rising. What the heck more do you want?
Just... speaking to the email here. My email is being quirky. Oh well. This should do.
Freedom IS free.
.
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The answer is quite dependent upon who you ask. If you ask me, it is indeed free. What?
That is right. Freedom is free. It was offered by God to man. No other power has the ability to offer freedom. The cost of freedom, initially, was... nothing. When man chose a path different from God, he gave up freedom for knowledge, or... something along those lines. We lost both freedom and wisdom to know what it was we were not supposed to do. Some bargain, but that is where things stand. No, that is not quite the end, follow a little further.
From that point on, man seemed to follow whatever his heart desired. Few men decided to seek wisdom, and through it real freedom, but most simply picked a master and went that way. Some of these masters are men outright, like generals, kings, false prophets, and such. Other masters, if they involve other men, involve them in only a small way. Drugs, wine, strong drink, sex, and other vices became the master, men gave themselves over to the pursuit of these things and surrendered freedom, responsibilities, and all that goes with freedom.
Christ came, saw, and conquered by showing that death itself was not a master. He, again, offered freedom and wisdom. The price for this was the surrendering of our life, our flesh. If this is not an easy price, it is a sure one. While many modern churches gloss this over and suggest, as the Jewish form of worship did and does, that it is what we gain in life which shows God offers favor. Foolish and wrongheaded, they have lead many astray. The truth is, for good men, our life is already surrendered. So losing our lives to promote real God granted freedoms is... no loss. It is merely an extension of a grant to life predicated on God's gifts. Freedom is free. Only in a secular world is losing one's life considered a true loss. Though too, only in a fallen world is this sacrifice painful for those who remain.
For this reason, the West has been the greatest military group in history. Even those who might have been tempted to hold onto their lives, when faced with certain evil, have gladly paid the price and fought those wars. With smaller armies, often outnumbered and outgunned at times, we have prevailed even through great sacrifice. The West is different. Although it is obvious those in the West who have forgotten God are now dependent upon those of us who have not. Anyway. Freedom is free, we have simply fallen and some of us have forgotten even the way back. Life is not ours, only freedom and wisdom... if we choose it.
Or, something like that.
.
The answer is quite dependent upon who you ask. If you ask me, it is indeed free. What?
That is right. Freedom is free. It was offered by God to man. No other power has the ability to offer freedom. The cost of freedom, initially, was... nothing. When man chose a path different from God, he gave up freedom for knowledge, or... something along those lines. We lost both freedom and wisdom to know what it was we were not supposed to do. Some bargain, but that is where things stand. No, that is not quite the end, follow a little further.
From that point on, man seemed to follow whatever his heart desired. Few men decided to seek wisdom, and through it real freedom, but most simply picked a master and went that way. Some of these masters are men outright, like generals, kings, false prophets, and such. Other masters, if they involve other men, involve them in only a small way. Drugs, wine, strong drink, sex, and other vices became the master, men gave themselves over to the pursuit of these things and surrendered freedom, responsibilities, and all that goes with freedom.
Christ came, saw, and conquered by showing that death itself was not a master. He, again, offered freedom and wisdom. The price for this was the surrendering of our life, our flesh. If this is not an easy price, it is a sure one. While many modern churches gloss this over and suggest, as the Jewish form of worship did and does, that it is what we gain in life which shows God offers favor. Foolish and wrongheaded, they have lead many astray. The truth is, for good men, our life is already surrendered. So losing our lives to promote real God granted freedoms is... no loss. It is merely an extension of a grant to life predicated on God's gifts. Freedom is free. Only in a secular world is losing one's life considered a true loss. Though too, only in a fallen world is this sacrifice painful for those who remain.
For this reason, the West has been the greatest military group in history. Even those who might have been tempted to hold onto their lives, when faced with certain evil, have gladly paid the price and fought those wars. With smaller armies, often outnumbered and outgunned at times, we have prevailed even through great sacrifice. The West is different. Although it is obvious those in the West who have forgotten God are now dependent upon those of us who have not. Anyway. Freedom is free, we have simply fallen and some of us have forgotten even the way back. Life is not ours, only freedom and wisdom... if we choose it.
Or, something like that.
Lots of interesting things in the news?
.
.
Not really. Missiles that may not be, Dems of various sorts doing what Dems do... Biden holding a hearing on transparency behind locked doors, Clinton funding jihad to the tune of $150m, Obama paying homage to fallen U.S. troops... overseas. Well, it gives newsies something to chatter about but there is little really happening. I am guessing, from the hush about the lame duck session and attempts to keep those who gained seats from taking there seats as the real news. As usual, the real news is not being reported. Why? Because even now, anything but a surprise hard left putsch in that lame duck session might otherwise be thwarted. Expect it.
I did see something interesting. It seems that playing tetris after a traumatic event can curtail flashbacks. It also seems that playing word type games increases flashback events. I am not an expert. However, I am a gamer and suffer from trauma, profoundly. They are not sure what is up with word games. I can tell you. Playing word games creates an ability to see patterns and connect words to memories much more efficiently than when not playing these games. It means what used to cause flashbacks, such as visual or other stimulus related to the trauma can now be cued by words. And as skills increase, the number of words which could cause an trauma instance becomes larger and much more varied. As for tetris, I can only speculate. It is my guess that, in playing this and games like it, the mind finds a mechanical means of dealing with problems... including trauma. So instead of increasing the incidents of flashbacks, the skills acquired help the mind to deal with areas of the mind and functions of the mind which seize up on specific cues.
I had not considered this before, however, as I read the article, things I have done, games I have played, and my interests came into clear view and mingled with what I read. I would also guess that mechanical or manual work also helps to cut the stimulus for flashbacks (and other problems, including dreams, mood problems, and such). I have found these things useful, but for whatever reason, I am not able to get myself to do those things as much as I would like. I have, instead of the simple fracture of trauma, a compound fracture. It is less easily lent to treatment. The one thing that seems to work is the one thing that is denied. In any case, I did think that was interesting news.
Oh, by the way, when I play word games even now, I do believe it increases incidents of dreaming. I think part of the reason I am a gamer is... because it does help. Like anything that helps, of course, it can be overdone. Living on this side of life, it is difficult to find the fractional parts of healing I need and knowing when enough is enough, when to switch gears, or how to even do that if I see it. It all seems simple enough, and it is. But simple is great unless you cannot actually do it. Oh well.
Ha! My mother called to see if I was stuck in a mountain of snow. Apparently she heard that Salt Lake City got hit and seemingly hard. She thought she would call and gloat. Nope, I suggested, no snow here. Only a skift, and that some time back, and it was gone by noon. She tries and she tries. :P It was good to have her at least try to pick on me though. I do need that too. Nag! Bah!
Well, back to trying to get that game going. The tech suggested I would be sent a password reset, but I received no such thing and none of the links included provided that. I did find the correct email address and tried to work with that but, again, had no luck. So I emailed back and am hoping to get that going before too long. We will see. At least I have someone live working on it, a name if not a face, and I should have that up and working before too long. Hey, it is something. There is little that can be done as winter appears to be rearing for a charge.
Later.
.
Not really. Missiles that may not be, Dems of various sorts doing what Dems do... Biden holding a hearing on transparency behind locked doors, Clinton funding jihad to the tune of $150m, Obama paying homage to fallen U.S. troops... overseas. Well, it gives newsies something to chatter about but there is little really happening. I am guessing, from the hush about the lame duck session and attempts to keep those who gained seats from taking there seats as the real news. As usual, the real news is not being reported. Why? Because even now, anything but a surprise hard left putsch in that lame duck session might otherwise be thwarted. Expect it.
I did see something interesting. It seems that playing tetris after a traumatic event can curtail flashbacks. It also seems that playing word type games increases flashback events. I am not an expert. However, I am a gamer and suffer from trauma, profoundly. They are not sure what is up with word games. I can tell you. Playing word games creates an ability to see patterns and connect words to memories much more efficiently than when not playing these games. It means what used to cause flashbacks, such as visual or other stimulus related to the trauma can now be cued by words. And as skills increase, the number of words which could cause an trauma instance becomes larger and much more varied. As for tetris, I can only speculate. It is my guess that, in playing this and games like it, the mind finds a mechanical means of dealing with problems... including trauma. So instead of increasing the incidents of flashbacks, the skills acquired help the mind to deal with areas of the mind and functions of the mind which seize up on specific cues.
I had not considered this before, however, as I read the article, things I have done, games I have played, and my interests came into clear view and mingled with what I read. I would also guess that mechanical or manual work also helps to cut the stimulus for flashbacks (and other problems, including dreams, mood problems, and such). I have found these things useful, but for whatever reason, I am not able to get myself to do those things as much as I would like. I have, instead of the simple fracture of trauma, a compound fracture. It is less easily lent to treatment. The one thing that seems to work is the one thing that is denied. In any case, I did think that was interesting news.
Oh, by the way, when I play word games even now, I do believe it increases incidents of dreaming. I think part of the reason I am a gamer is... because it does help. Like anything that helps, of course, it can be overdone. Living on this side of life, it is difficult to find the fractional parts of healing I need and knowing when enough is enough, when to switch gears, or how to even do that if I see it. It all seems simple enough, and it is. But simple is great unless you cannot actually do it. Oh well.
Ha! My mother called to see if I was stuck in a mountain of snow. Apparently she heard that Salt Lake City got hit and seemingly hard. She thought she would call and gloat. Nope, I suggested, no snow here. Only a skift, and that some time back, and it was gone by noon. She tries and she tries. :P It was good to have her at least try to pick on me though. I do need that too. Nag! Bah!
Well, back to trying to get that game going. The tech suggested I would be sent a password reset, but I received no such thing and none of the links included provided that. I did find the correct email address and tried to work with that but, again, had no luck. So I emailed back and am hoping to get that going before too long. We will see. At least I have someone live working on it, a name if not a face, and I should have that up and working before too long. Hey, it is something. There is little that can be done as winter appears to be rearing for a charge.
Later.
Always more difficulty.
.
.
As winter approaches and activity decreases, I realized that playing computer games would offer some relief from boredom. So, I installed the games I have and tried to play. Of course, I only have two of the three discs needed as one of the additional parts of the game was purchased online. Now, of course, you cannot simply sign into the game and go that rout, you have to have another sign in name and password for the overall game store. This, actually, is the one I cannot seem to get working. I sent an email. In any case, I cannot find my sign in name and password for the game itself, either, so I would have had to email anyway. Long story still pretty long but shorter than it could have been, I wait.
I have had no luck getting the printer going either. I may simply have to take the computer back and have him look at it. If he cannot get things working again, I may have to take it to another shop. This thing is dying and every "repair" I have done on it usually ends up making the thing worse. Old computers really are not that maintainable. Between OS updates, losing the availability of drivers and updates so those drivers will work with the OS updates, and whatever else, machines die hard deaths but in pieces. I really need a new machine. A decent gaming machine is simply out of my reach at the moment. Gaming is the main reason I have not gone with Linux. It simply does not support many games, certainly not the ones I prefer. It is for eggheads who want to dicker with a computer and programming, perhaps with some business applications (if those seem a bit limited, just like games). Ah well.
Not much is happening and I am still in drift mode. I have done a bit more after that burst of "work" early in the week. I continue to eat and almost stay even with dishes. Sam and Sassy are doing fine. Their fights are becoming closer to real fights. Sam no longer simply bats, she claws and bites and hassles Sassy back. I am starting to think they will not get along. Such is the way of it. As long as neither runs away, I suppose that is good enough.
I have been doing research on recommended tools for home improvements and such. I have a good deal of those. I am missing, from what I have read, a random orbital sander and a good miter saw. Looking over the options, a larger double slider is more what I am looking for. I will look on Cragslist and a regional classified section which is as good or better than Cragslist but only good in Utah. I am keeping my eyes open for a specific type of ladder too. One of my problems with getting going on things, other than not knowing how sometimes, is the fear of... running out of money while still having need mid-project. That is enough to make your blood run cold if you have been there on a little thing. I have decided to try and get tools in line, then money, before beginning any major or even minor project.
It has been difficult trying to do too many things at once. Buying tools is fine. Collecting food is fine. But trying to do projects which always end up costing bits here and bits there, getting settled, and everything else, has been too much too fast. This has lead to me living hand to mouth for months, and that cuts me harshly. That is, most likely, why I am in the shape I am in. I become afraid to spend anything. And yet being pushed forward I end up doing little bits of all of it and getting nowhere. A few more tools over the course of this winter. Some food in storage and all the other bills and needs. And probably by next summer I will be in a financial position to take on a minor task as a starter. Say, building a covered stoop over my front door.
The next project, maybe that same summer, but more likely the summer after, would be redoing the master bath. I would like to see if I can extend it, add a bath, keep a shower (though this one would have to go, unfortunately), enclose and vent the toilet, and maybe even build cabinetry for it myself, though the top and sink would have to be bought. That is when I will need some help. Plumbing, perhaps, though I will be digging into what is needed and how to do it before deciding that for certain. But I will be having the tankless electric water heater put in. That would add a good deal of floorspace for other modifications, as the current (second) water heater is right in there. Working with plumbing and electricity at the same time is a bit daunting. The dyi manual I have is okay, but does not have enough depth. By the way, the dyi manuals are coded. So I do not need to get the code books themselves, if it would be nice to have someone around who knows a bit about local variances or find a source for that. Mind you, I do not think, to this point, regardless of any schooling I may have had, that I have changed so much as a household fuse.
Well, that is what I am thinking. I am hoping, now that I have made a large decision to set work off for a couple of years, that I might be able to settle down and begin being a bit more active. Some things just freeze me up. It is not the only thing, but the worry about getting to work on things was a major concern, and which things to start with. Yeah, yeah, the fireplace and insert are on the list. But my guess is, similar to solar electric, I simply cannot afford that... perhaps ever. I will have to develop poor man methods to various things in the short term.
Good night.
.
As winter approaches and activity decreases, I realized that playing computer games would offer some relief from boredom. So, I installed the games I have and tried to play. Of course, I only have two of the three discs needed as one of the additional parts of the game was purchased online. Now, of course, you cannot simply sign into the game and go that rout, you have to have another sign in name and password for the overall game store. This, actually, is the one I cannot seem to get working. I sent an email. In any case, I cannot find my sign in name and password for the game itself, either, so I would have had to email anyway. Long story still pretty long but shorter than it could have been, I wait.
I have had no luck getting the printer going either. I may simply have to take the computer back and have him look at it. If he cannot get things working again, I may have to take it to another shop. This thing is dying and every "repair" I have done on it usually ends up making the thing worse. Old computers really are not that maintainable. Between OS updates, losing the availability of drivers and updates so those drivers will work with the OS updates, and whatever else, machines die hard deaths but in pieces. I really need a new machine. A decent gaming machine is simply out of my reach at the moment. Gaming is the main reason I have not gone with Linux. It simply does not support many games, certainly not the ones I prefer. It is for eggheads who want to dicker with a computer and programming, perhaps with some business applications (if those seem a bit limited, just like games). Ah well.
Not much is happening and I am still in drift mode. I have done a bit more after that burst of "work" early in the week. I continue to eat and almost stay even with dishes. Sam and Sassy are doing fine. Their fights are becoming closer to real fights. Sam no longer simply bats, she claws and bites and hassles Sassy back. I am starting to think they will not get along. Such is the way of it. As long as neither runs away, I suppose that is good enough.
I have been doing research on recommended tools for home improvements and such. I have a good deal of those. I am missing, from what I have read, a random orbital sander and a good miter saw. Looking over the options, a larger double slider is more what I am looking for. I will look on Cragslist and a regional classified section which is as good or better than Cragslist but only good in Utah. I am keeping my eyes open for a specific type of ladder too. One of my problems with getting going on things, other than not knowing how sometimes, is the fear of... running out of money while still having need mid-project. That is enough to make your blood run cold if you have been there on a little thing. I have decided to try and get tools in line, then money, before beginning any major or even minor project.
It has been difficult trying to do too many things at once. Buying tools is fine. Collecting food is fine. But trying to do projects which always end up costing bits here and bits there, getting settled, and everything else, has been too much too fast. This has lead to me living hand to mouth for months, and that cuts me harshly. That is, most likely, why I am in the shape I am in. I become afraid to spend anything. And yet being pushed forward I end up doing little bits of all of it and getting nowhere. A few more tools over the course of this winter. Some food in storage and all the other bills and needs. And probably by next summer I will be in a financial position to take on a minor task as a starter. Say, building a covered stoop over my front door.
The next project, maybe that same summer, but more likely the summer after, would be redoing the master bath. I would like to see if I can extend it, add a bath, keep a shower (though this one would have to go, unfortunately), enclose and vent the toilet, and maybe even build cabinetry for it myself, though the top and sink would have to be bought. That is when I will need some help. Plumbing, perhaps, though I will be digging into what is needed and how to do it before deciding that for certain. But I will be having the tankless electric water heater put in. That would add a good deal of floorspace for other modifications, as the current (second) water heater is right in there. Working with plumbing and electricity at the same time is a bit daunting. The dyi manual I have is okay, but does not have enough depth. By the way, the dyi manuals are coded. So I do not need to get the code books themselves, if it would be nice to have someone around who knows a bit about local variances or find a source for that. Mind you, I do not think, to this point, regardless of any schooling I may have had, that I have changed so much as a household fuse.
Well, that is what I am thinking. I am hoping, now that I have made a large decision to set work off for a couple of years, that I might be able to settle down and begin being a bit more active. Some things just freeze me up. It is not the only thing, but the worry about getting to work on things was a major concern, and which things to start with. Yeah, yeah, the fireplace and insert are on the list. But my guess is, similar to solar electric, I simply cannot afford that... perhaps ever. I will have to develop poor man methods to various things in the short term.
Good night.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Regarding insanity.
.
.
I was just having a conversation with a friend of mine, one who happens to be insane. No, not a literal conversation, a mock one in my mind. This person holds onto insanity like a safety device. I have spoken with this person many times in the past. As I was going through the exercise today, something popped up I felt like sharing.
This person is completely functional, other than in the mind, if unrelated to stable performance. This person is employed, and rather decently given all circumstances. If this person is rather isolated, it is more a personality thing than it is a psychological issue, in large part, as this person is rather introverted. Beyond work, there are fulfilling and very enjoyed activities, both singular to a smaller degree and group events which this person enjoys (if the group is loose and together time as a large group is easily optional). For all intents and purposes, this person is currently and for some many years, a functional human with good standing in society and employment. This person is, as well, quite mad around the edges and in the main. Not dangerously so, mostly, but... there are problems.
I am, for the most part, sane around the edges. I do not have things that sneak up on me, take my breath away, voices in my head (other than, "Doh! You are late"... but I think that voice is mine. :p ), or any of the rest. And yet, here I sit. I receive money for being an incompetent boob. If I were the type of economically dysfunctional boob which needed to be in a bra, I would be size EEE or something. *sigh* I cannot, on any given day, rise and go forth. I love to work, but cannot get to it. I enjoy being outdoors, but it just rarely happens. I am perpetually tired, exhausted, drawn. Even so, I make great efforts to be pleasant to others, and enjoy doing so.
So, there we are, two types of madness. One of body, one of mind. One of us can function intellectually rather well. The other can function in the flesh easily. Mental and mechanical madness could be no better juxtaposed than in who each of us is and how we function. I do not know what the rest of the conversation was going to be, as this notion swallowed me whole. I think I did end up wondering that one of us could not figure out how to fix the other. I think I would gladly give my acuity to see another flourish. Anyway, back to goofing.
.
I was just having a conversation with a friend of mine, one who happens to be insane. No, not a literal conversation, a mock one in my mind. This person holds onto insanity like a safety device. I have spoken with this person many times in the past. As I was going through the exercise today, something popped up I felt like sharing.
This person is completely functional, other than in the mind, if unrelated to stable performance. This person is employed, and rather decently given all circumstances. If this person is rather isolated, it is more a personality thing than it is a psychological issue, in large part, as this person is rather introverted. Beyond work, there are fulfilling and very enjoyed activities, both singular to a smaller degree and group events which this person enjoys (if the group is loose and together time as a large group is easily optional). For all intents and purposes, this person is currently and for some many years, a functional human with good standing in society and employment. This person is, as well, quite mad around the edges and in the main. Not dangerously so, mostly, but... there are problems.
I am, for the most part, sane around the edges. I do not have things that sneak up on me, take my breath away, voices in my head (other than, "Doh! You are late"... but I think that voice is mine. :p ), or any of the rest. And yet, here I sit. I receive money for being an incompetent boob. If I were the type of economically dysfunctional boob which needed to be in a bra, I would be size EEE or something. *sigh* I cannot, on any given day, rise and go forth. I love to work, but cannot get to it. I enjoy being outdoors, but it just rarely happens. I am perpetually tired, exhausted, drawn. Even so, I make great efforts to be pleasant to others, and enjoy doing so.
So, there we are, two types of madness. One of body, one of mind. One of us can function intellectually rather well. The other can function in the flesh easily. Mental and mechanical madness could be no better juxtaposed than in who each of us is and how we function. I do not know what the rest of the conversation was going to be, as this notion swallowed me whole. I think I did end up wondering that one of us could not figure out how to fix the other. I think I would gladly give my acuity to see another flourish. Anyway, back to goofing.
Not sure what I am doing.
.
.
I have about given up on the printer. I have seen the computer itself recognize the printer, but the software for it continue to deny there is a printer present. I have restarted, changed USB plugin points, messed with what I can mess with, but the device refuses to be useful. I may simply strip everything but the drivers and see if that will work. While I am using a Canon, I do that because for the last three years, HP printers (my old standby), and computers actually, became impossible to use. They seem to have moved their plants overseas, or from a decent overseas location to a less reliable source, and it ruined their products (three printers and a higher end computer from them were all returned). This Canon used to work just fine. Not sure why a reset would make it a problem.
I woke to feed the brats this morning and noticed snow outside. It was just a small amount, not a full covering, and is gone as I write. It was chilly out there, perhaps it was merely frost. I do not think it is quite winter though. No other news and no real attitude going on. Later.
.
I have about given up on the printer. I have seen the computer itself recognize the printer, but the software for it continue to deny there is a printer present. I have restarted, changed USB plugin points, messed with what I can mess with, but the device refuses to be useful. I may simply strip everything but the drivers and see if that will work. While I am using a Canon, I do that because for the last three years, HP printers (my old standby), and computers actually, became impossible to use. They seem to have moved their plants overseas, or from a decent overseas location to a less reliable source, and it ruined their products (three printers and a higher end computer from them were all returned). This Canon used to work just fine. Not sure why a reset would make it a problem.
I woke to feed the brats this morning and noticed snow outside. It was just a small amount, not a full covering, and is gone as I write. It was chilly out there, perhaps it was merely frost. I do not think it is quite winter though. No other news and no real attitude going on. Later.
A very tasty treat indeed.
.
.
What you have always wanted to know but were afraid to ask. And, it a rather friendly, forward, easy to handle yet non-simplistic format. I present... a master...
Enjoy.
Wowed me.
Drats, you will have to click on it and go to Youtube. It does not seem to be able to fit into my set-up. I have seen, over at Vox and some other people's site, the ability to expand the video. Unfortunately I am quite new to this. Actually, I was pleased to get it up at all. Anyway, go... watch... learn.
.
What you have always wanted to know but were afraid to ask. And, it a rather friendly, forward, easy to handle yet non-simplistic format. I present... a master...
Enjoy.
Wowed me.
Drats, you will have to click on it and go to Youtube. It does not seem to be able to fit into my set-up. I have seen, over at Vox and some other people's site, the ability to expand the video. Unfortunately I am quite new to this. Actually, I was pleased to get it up at all. Anyway, go... watch... learn.
Out and about.
.
.
I almost did not get out to shoot. I was tinkering with my computer and printer, trying to get it to work. No such luck. I have tried many things. I certainly installed what was needed. I know the printer is hooked up. But the computer looses the link to the printer from time to time. I have it hooked in via USB. I tried different USB connections, I tried to pick which connection to use (ran out of time trying them all so will continue that). Nothing. It is a pain. I need to print and send something, which I had promised to send... yesterday. Is that not always the case? I thought the getting the printer going was merely a matter of finding the drivers. Blah.
Still, we did get out. My rifle was dirty. After a couple of tubes (16 rounds each), the action became cranky. I had not taken my .22 pistol because it needs cleaned. So, that was that. My friend wanted me to try some hot .38 loads in his .357 though. Heavy loads hurt his hand, so he lets me go first. I am a terrible analogue for him though. I can handle the hottest .357 magnum loads with no difficulty, in spite of it being a small framed pistol with only a two inch barrel. He has trouble with even the .38 +P. Still, I got the gun warmed up for him.
I was accurate as could be, again, with his pistol. Out to probably 30 yards I hit and hit again. If the target is 5 yards beyond that though, the gig is up. A slightly looser grip makes the difference at the good ranges but makes no difference at some point. With the rifle, I pretty much cannot miss. I shoot at quarter sized pieces of orange clays at 50 to 70 yards and up a hill a bit. Considering the ammunition, wind, iron sights, and that it was growing dark, and then ignoring that, I did well. I do like that rifle. After that we went for dinner. Angie's it was. I have not eaten there in some time. Every time I go I wonder why I have not been back sooner. Great food, excellent service, and it does not cost an arm and a leg.
Picking up a tobacco, dropping my friend off, and then doing some shopping finished the day. More caffeine! I bought enough to last me a month or more, as it was on sale. As well, I grabbed a couple of things which have or are suggested to help with a grouchy bottom. Dried apricots and pistachios went into the cart. A few cleaning supplies, some cord to create a proper indoor clothes line, and a few other items just to tip the scales. More cat food as well. I am fairly well stocked on both cat food and litter material for a good bit of time. That is something I do not want to be without. Oh, and I got that bill out. It was three months late and counting. I did write an apology as well, on the check. A simple one.
The bottom is doing better, if I still dread bowel movements. The last bm came out fairly easily and other than already having a sore bottom, as painlessly as usual. Still, I am going to have to baby my bowels for a bit. I have two ribeyes out, big ones, as absolutely nothing both encourages going while salving the path as much as beef fat. Further, it is some of the best tasting medicine I could hope for.
Well, back to the printer. I have the envelope ready for the printed material, if I could just get it to print! Arghhhhh! Later or good night.
.
I almost did not get out to shoot. I was tinkering with my computer and printer, trying to get it to work. No such luck. I have tried many things. I certainly installed what was needed. I know the printer is hooked up. But the computer looses the link to the printer from time to time. I have it hooked in via USB. I tried different USB connections, I tried to pick which connection to use (ran out of time trying them all so will continue that). Nothing. It is a pain. I need to print and send something, which I had promised to send... yesterday. Is that not always the case? I thought the getting the printer going was merely a matter of finding the drivers. Blah.
Still, we did get out. My rifle was dirty. After a couple of tubes (16 rounds each), the action became cranky. I had not taken my .22 pistol because it needs cleaned. So, that was that. My friend wanted me to try some hot .38 loads in his .357 though. Heavy loads hurt his hand, so he lets me go first. I am a terrible analogue for him though. I can handle the hottest .357 magnum loads with no difficulty, in spite of it being a small framed pistol with only a two inch barrel. He has trouble with even the .38 +P. Still, I got the gun warmed up for him.
I was accurate as could be, again, with his pistol. Out to probably 30 yards I hit and hit again. If the target is 5 yards beyond that though, the gig is up. A slightly looser grip makes the difference at the good ranges but makes no difference at some point. With the rifle, I pretty much cannot miss. I shoot at quarter sized pieces of orange clays at 50 to 70 yards and up a hill a bit. Considering the ammunition, wind, iron sights, and that it was growing dark, and then ignoring that, I did well. I do like that rifle. After that we went for dinner. Angie's it was. I have not eaten there in some time. Every time I go I wonder why I have not been back sooner. Great food, excellent service, and it does not cost an arm and a leg.
Picking up a tobacco, dropping my friend off, and then doing some shopping finished the day. More caffeine! I bought enough to last me a month or more, as it was on sale. As well, I grabbed a couple of things which have or are suggested to help with a grouchy bottom. Dried apricots and pistachios went into the cart. A few cleaning supplies, some cord to create a proper indoor clothes line, and a few other items just to tip the scales. More cat food as well. I am fairly well stocked on both cat food and litter material for a good bit of time. That is something I do not want to be without. Oh, and I got that bill out. It was three months late and counting. I did write an apology as well, on the check. A simple one.
The bottom is doing better, if I still dread bowel movements. The last bm came out fairly easily and other than already having a sore bottom, as painlessly as usual. Still, I am going to have to baby my bowels for a bit. I have two ribeyes out, big ones, as absolutely nothing both encourages going while salving the path as much as beef fat. Further, it is some of the best tasting medicine I could hope for.
Well, back to the printer. I have the envelope ready for the printed material, if I could just get it to print! Arghhhhh! Later or good night.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Getting ready.
.
.
I have a few tasks to manage today. A bill NEEDS to be paid. Since I cannot get up early enough to get in and pay it, I will have to send it. As well, I need to get my printer working in order to print something else I need to send. As well, a shower and grooming needs to happen so that I can go shooting. My friend is chewing at the bit to get out and put some down range. It looks like it will rain again, but I will risk it. Who knows. Oh, I called my mom this morning and told her I was buying a pressure cooker. Years back she had forced me to promise I would never buy one. I explained that this was a newfangled one, which could not open while hot and would not explode. Plus, I think she finally realizes that, at least when I cook, I am rather... well grounded. I think I have impressed her with my attention to the affair (when as she suggests I get off my lazy butt and get to it). She is good, and busy. She now drives several of the elderly around, keeping 80 and 90 year olds off the roads. Hey, someone has to do it and she loves people and company... and shopping. Doh!
I did not get the last few dishes done or soak beans. Oh well. I finished off the rice for breakfast so I need to cook more of that, after cleaning that pot too, but later, and as always, maybe. I will be soaking beans in a few moments. I need those long storing food stuffs, it is the only way I can keep up. Sam is out for a run, Sassy got milk. I am hoping Sam will come in as I am heading out so I can put her in before, if my suspicions are correct, it rains and she goes to ground and refuses to come in for another day or two. Neither Sam nor I like that situation.
Well, off and on it... I... think? Bah. Let me put on the beans and look for the printer software. Stinking failing machines! Later.
.
I have a few tasks to manage today. A bill NEEDS to be paid. Since I cannot get up early enough to get in and pay it, I will have to send it. As well, I need to get my printer working in order to print something else I need to send. As well, a shower and grooming needs to happen so that I can go shooting. My friend is chewing at the bit to get out and put some down range. It looks like it will rain again, but I will risk it. Who knows. Oh, I called my mom this morning and told her I was buying a pressure cooker. Years back she had forced me to promise I would never buy one. I explained that this was a newfangled one, which could not open while hot and would not explode. Plus, I think she finally realizes that, at least when I cook, I am rather... well grounded. I think I have impressed her with my attention to the affair (when as she suggests I get off my lazy butt and get to it). She is good, and busy. She now drives several of the elderly around, keeping 80 and 90 year olds off the roads. Hey, someone has to do it and she loves people and company... and shopping. Doh!
I did not get the last few dishes done or soak beans. Oh well. I finished off the rice for breakfast so I need to cook more of that, after cleaning that pot too, but later, and as always, maybe. I will be soaking beans in a few moments. I need those long storing food stuffs, it is the only way I can keep up. Sam is out for a run, Sassy got milk. I am hoping Sam will come in as I am heading out so I can put her in before, if my suspicions are correct, it rains and she goes to ground and refuses to come in for another day or two. Neither Sam nor I like that situation.
Well, off and on it... I... think? Bah. Let me put on the beans and look for the printer software. Stinking failing machines! Later.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Some things done.
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.
After that last, I checked on Sam. Sometimes, when bad weather closes in, she simply disappears, finding some dry but distant place to hole up. I have been checking on her all afternoon and evening and had, sadly, realistically, given up. This time she arrived. She shot in from some odd corner of nowhere so that I was almost not sure she entered. It is strange, as good as my eyes and such are, how she and Sassy can almost sneak up on me or past me. Not quite but almost.
I checked on one of my bills, one that I was concerned about. It seems that they have stopped emailing notifications. The good news is that the bill is still being paid. Better still, it is paid off in January. I tried my mortgage center again. They asked for a security question to which I knew the answer. Nope. They refused to allow a connection. They are terrible about this. It looks more like they do not want people to pay than anything. Who is going to sneak onto my account AND PAY MY FUCKING BILL? Idiots. So, I went through my bank (one of them) and have set up automatic payments through them. Bastards. Having a blood pressure moment... never worry... never mind.
I have also been considering a couple of items. I know, I was not going to spend ANY MONEY this month. Well, except for a pressure cooker. And, I will use the heck out of it. Beans and rice once a week, grains a couple of times a weak at least, and I would like to explore stews (hate soups, mostly), potroast, tongue and heart, cheaper beef cuts, whole chicken, and combinations of meats and vegetables. This item could really make cooking easy, and since I do not have a vent, it would making indoor cooking cleaner. Along with that, however, I purchased... a few more items. A coffee pot, which I sort of need. A coffee grinder, of course (manual burr grinder, so good for more than just that and off the grid as well, if I like it I might buy another for herbs and spices and other things nicess (I cheat but it rhymes)), a cookbook that has been on the menu a while, and two pressure cooker cookbooks as well. Oh, I had other things on the list. I pared that down, added more, pared that down, added more. Bah! I should not be trusted with money. Still, given all things, I did okay. I think. I will know how well I picked when the items arrive. Oh, here is the pressure cooker set I chose. If it works really well, both sizes, I may order another lid when I order extra parts. (Always buy extra parts, always, duplicates if affordable.) Having two pressure cookers in play at once can really be an advantage in more complex cuisine, when two main items take a lot of time to cook but need very different cook times, with clashing ingredients, or in a number of other scenarios.
I still need to set the beans to soak, perhaps do a few more dishes, and then maybe hit it. Or not. Frag but it can be difficult to cut the engine. Good night, maybe.
.
After that last, I checked on Sam. Sometimes, when bad weather closes in, she simply disappears, finding some dry but distant place to hole up. I have been checking on her all afternoon and evening and had, sadly, realistically, given up. This time she arrived. She shot in from some odd corner of nowhere so that I was almost not sure she entered. It is strange, as good as my eyes and such are, how she and Sassy can almost sneak up on me or past me. Not quite but almost.
I checked on one of my bills, one that I was concerned about. It seems that they have stopped emailing notifications. The good news is that the bill is still being paid. Better still, it is paid off in January. I tried my mortgage center again. They asked for a security question to which I knew the answer. Nope. They refused to allow a connection. They are terrible about this. It looks more like they do not want people to pay than anything. Who is going to sneak onto my account AND PAY MY FUCKING BILL? Idiots. So, I went through my bank (one of them) and have set up automatic payments through them. Bastards. Having a blood pressure moment... never worry... never mind.
I have also been considering a couple of items. I know, I was not going to spend ANY MONEY this month. Well, except for a pressure cooker. And, I will use the heck out of it. Beans and rice once a week, grains a couple of times a weak at least, and I would like to explore stews (hate soups, mostly), potroast, tongue and heart, cheaper beef cuts, whole chicken, and combinations of meats and vegetables. This item could really make cooking easy, and since I do not have a vent, it would making indoor cooking cleaner. Along with that, however, I purchased... a few more items. A coffee pot, which I sort of need. A coffee grinder, of course (manual burr grinder, so good for more than just that and off the grid as well, if I like it I might buy another for herbs and spices and other things nicess (I cheat but it rhymes)), a cookbook that has been on the menu a while, and two pressure cooker cookbooks as well. Oh, I had other things on the list. I pared that down, added more, pared that down, added more. Bah! I should not be trusted with money. Still, given all things, I did okay. I think. I will know how well I picked when the items arrive. Oh, here is the pressure cooker set I chose. If it works really well, both sizes, I may order another lid when I order extra parts. (Always buy extra parts, always, duplicates if affordable.) Having two pressure cookers in play at once can really be an advantage in more complex cuisine, when two main items take a lot of time to cook but need very different cook times, with clashing ingredients, or in a number of other scenarios.
I still need to set the beans to soak, perhaps do a few more dishes, and then maybe hit it. Or not. Frag but it can be difficult to cut the engine. Good night, maybe.
We will see.
.
.
Cold, here, now. Raining, not snowing, the last I looked a few minutes ago. I could turn up the heat but I am trying to use cold (62 F) as my an incentive to sleep. It often works, to a degree. And yet, this is my time of year. Of course, there is some work I want done before it cannot be done. I am simply not sure if it is possible. Such is life.
I did more dishes, I ate a couple more times after the oatmeal (all good high fiber foods). I enjoyed the day with Sassy, but Sam wanted out when it was not raining and has not let me know she wanted back in. It is raining and cold, so I know she wants in. We must have missed. I will keep trying to get her in. I never did set beans to soak, so I will do that as a last thing before trying to get to bed. Yesterday was a disaster, seeing me in bed not at 20:00 or 22:00 as I had attempted, but not until 4:50 or so this morning.
I still have a number of things to set up with the computer. Bills need to be paid and it seems that when my computer crashes, some of those bills I had set on automatic stop being paid. Huh? Yes, for whatever reason, automated payments seem to end. I honestly think companies have been corrupt enough that, if they think you have lost control of your machine and payments, they will kick it off so that you have to pay late charges. Yeah, I suspect so. Anyway, I will do more work on that tonight. Right, one of the bills is my mortgage. I have been trying to get a payment through but their "system" keeps refusing. Trust know company these days, banks and financiers least of all.
So, beans set to soak and a few business connections to work on, Sam to be let in, then on to bed if I can make it. My bung hole is really sore, legs are improving though. Not ripped, simply... stretched. A good thing as even slight tears can be very unhealthy I would have to guess. Laugh, I do, am, sort of. It is times like these when I realize... it's great to be straight. I used to have a donut pillow, though not for this reason. I wish I could lay my hands, and seat, on it.
Good night.
.
Cold, here, now. Raining, not snowing, the last I looked a few minutes ago. I could turn up the heat but I am trying to use cold (62 F) as my an incentive to sleep. It often works, to a degree. And yet, this is my time of year. Of course, there is some work I want done before it cannot be done. I am simply not sure if it is possible. Such is life.
I did more dishes, I ate a couple more times after the oatmeal (all good high fiber foods). I enjoyed the day with Sassy, but Sam wanted out when it was not raining and has not let me know she wanted back in. It is raining and cold, so I know she wants in. We must have missed. I will keep trying to get her in. I never did set beans to soak, so I will do that as a last thing before trying to get to bed. Yesterday was a disaster, seeing me in bed not at 20:00 or 22:00 as I had attempted, but not until 4:50 or so this morning.
I still have a number of things to set up with the computer. Bills need to be paid and it seems that when my computer crashes, some of those bills I had set on automatic stop being paid. Huh? Yes, for whatever reason, automated payments seem to end. I honestly think companies have been corrupt enough that, if they think you have lost control of your machine and payments, they will kick it off so that you have to pay late charges. Yeah, I suspect so. Anyway, I will do more work on that tonight. Right, one of the bills is my mortgage. I have been trying to get a payment through but their "system" keeps refusing. Trust know company these days, banks and financiers least of all.
So, beans set to soak and a few business connections to work on, Sam to be let in, then on to bed if I can make it. My bung hole is really sore, legs are improving though. Not ripped, simply... stretched. A good thing as even slight tears can be very unhealthy I would have to guess. Laugh, I do, am, sort of. It is times like these when I realize... it's great to be straight. I used to have a donut pillow, though not for this reason. I wish I could lay my hands, and seat, on it.
Good night.
Gone II.
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.
I definitely have to get diet and drink back on track. If yesterday was a baseball, today I found the bat. The good thing is that I did not seem to have to struggle more than a half hour today. Good thing too, my legs are about done in. They feel like I hiked up and then down a mountain. That skiing trip was not as harsh on my legs muscles as have been the last two days. Hmm, maybe that will put me in line to begin trekking? Whatever. All I know is today scared me off my butt and got enough dishes done to cook rice for later and oatmeal for breakfast. I will probably be able to finish the dishes and maybe get beans soaking for later or tomorrow.
It is raining, so my friend did not call. Beside being a wetaphobe, he is a coldophobee. As things cool and stay that way, I will be buying him some winter underwear. Nothing fancy, just enough that he is not freezing when we go out. I usually do not need it around here, so far, and from what I have seen. I would only really need it if I was going to go winter hiking or something. Well, actually, I take that back. There were a few times where I wished I had worn it last year, which prompted me to remember proper underlayers on some occasions. It just depends on how hard the wind is blowing.
The lunicats are doing well. I still have to put Sassy in her place when I do not feed her what she wants when she wants it. I do try to keep some food available to her at almost all times. She is growing and absolutely needs tons of food. I remember those days well. Her problem is hard cat and kitty food is not to her liking. She wants milk and the soft stuff I keep around for a daily treat. Like any kid, she can get surly. I have found that 'that look', a slightly raised voice, and a gentle swat or the threat of one generally calms her down. If nothing else, I will chase her a few steps. *Brrrh!* "I do not care, but I think I will keep my claws to myself and not care... over... here... no here... no... blah.", she seems to say. She is a cutey pie, and a pest. Sam is golden. Mellow, caring when she wants to be, and a gentle pest when she wants outdoors or food. She generally gets what she wants because I find I can trust her wants and needs... if I understand them. I really enjoy my fellow asylum mates, and for the most part I think it is mutual. Sassy has her main coat, I think, now. She was pretty odd looking with that middling coat, it reminded me of the big hair women wore in the 80's.
I will probably be getting my friend a few things for Christmas. Mostly along the lines of warm gear and maybe a couple of magazine loading devices. He struggles with that and I just saw a few that would help him out. He has fixed his nose, which should tend his bleeding out problem. He has taken care of a few other things as well. He has one more thing to do before he is about as fixed as he can get, cataract surgery. Did I mention he is an excellent shot? It is too bad he had not gotten into competitive shooting when he was much younger. He would be well retired, assuming he had put money away properly. Well, okay, he would still be broke. Some of us simply have no understanding of wealth, money, and such. Being wealthy, or even comfortable, is not most people's lot.
Have a good day.
.
I definitely have to get diet and drink back on track. If yesterday was a baseball, today I found the bat. The good thing is that I did not seem to have to struggle more than a half hour today. Good thing too, my legs are about done in. They feel like I hiked up and then down a mountain. That skiing trip was not as harsh on my legs muscles as have been the last two days. Hmm, maybe that will put me in line to begin trekking? Whatever. All I know is today scared me off my butt and got enough dishes done to cook rice for later and oatmeal for breakfast. I will probably be able to finish the dishes and maybe get beans soaking for later or tomorrow.
It is raining, so my friend did not call. Beside being a wetaphobe, he is a coldophobee. As things cool and stay that way, I will be buying him some winter underwear. Nothing fancy, just enough that he is not freezing when we go out. I usually do not need it around here, so far, and from what I have seen. I would only really need it if I was going to go winter hiking or something. Well, actually, I take that back. There were a few times where I wished I had worn it last year, which prompted me to remember proper underlayers on some occasions. It just depends on how hard the wind is blowing.
The lunicats are doing well. I still have to put Sassy in her place when I do not feed her what she wants when she wants it. I do try to keep some food available to her at almost all times. She is growing and absolutely needs tons of food. I remember those days well. Her problem is hard cat and kitty food is not to her liking. She wants milk and the soft stuff I keep around for a daily treat. Like any kid, she can get surly. I have found that 'that look', a slightly raised voice, and a gentle swat or the threat of one generally calms her down. If nothing else, I will chase her a few steps. *Brrrh!* "I do not care, but I think I will keep my claws to myself and not care... over... here... no here... no... blah.", she seems to say. She is a cutey pie, and a pest. Sam is golden. Mellow, caring when she wants to be, and a gentle pest when she wants outdoors or food. She generally gets what she wants because I find I can trust her wants and needs... if I understand them. I really enjoy my fellow asylum mates, and for the most part I think it is mutual. Sassy has her main coat, I think, now. She was pretty odd looking with that middling coat, it reminded me of the big hair women wore in the 80's.
I will probably be getting my friend a few things for Christmas. Mostly along the lines of warm gear and maybe a couple of magazine loading devices. He struggles with that and I just saw a few that would help him out. He has fixed his nose, which should tend his bleeding out problem. He has taken care of a few other things as well. He has one more thing to do before he is about as fixed as he can get, cataract surgery. Did I mention he is an excellent shot? It is too bad he had not gotten into competitive shooting when he was much younger. He would be well retired, assuming he had put money away properly. Well, okay, he would still be broke. Some of us simply have no understanding of wealth, money, and such. Being wealthy, or even comfortable, is not most people's lot.
Have a good day.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
More work than I intended if little that I had planned.
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.
You may or may not realize, but fasting for vast amounts of time, becoming dehydrated, and not being very active, sometimes invites a very personal problem. This problem ended up being somewhere between the size of a golf ball and a baseball, harder than a baseball, and quite textured, dry, and rough as sandpaper. It took me between four and five hours to tend to my personal issue, in and out of the place in which I needed to care for that little obstruction. I have not worked that hard in, well, probably since I did the mountaineering type snow skiing. My legs are sore from assuming the position and the strain and I have a slight headache. I am surprised my stomach is not sore. I am solid there, if too that is where my fat collects. Well, my ears are still ringing powerfully. Push I did, 45 minutes at a time at least four times. Wouch.
Anyway, little else was done. As I got into that task, standing between efforts was rather uncomfortable, more so than simply sitting. I have rested since completing that task and will probably call it a night shortly. That was an amazing lot of work for such a little gain... or loss... depending on how you look at things. On the good side, I think I am becoming more active! That effort should kickstart Monday. If I can get to bed early enough, I might be able to get up early and begin dishes and laundry before too long, maybe taking a nap after. With the plans to go into town and then shooting in the afternoon, I could see the rest of the week becoming more active. We will see.
Eat, drink, and do so wisely. If you do not it will certainly get you in the end. I need to get the dishes washed and begin eating oats, cracked and flaked mixed grains, rice, beans, and meat again. I have incentive out the... Well, you know. No butts about it.
.
You may or may not realize, but fasting for vast amounts of time, becoming dehydrated, and not being very active, sometimes invites a very personal problem. This problem ended up being somewhere between the size of a golf ball and a baseball, harder than a baseball, and quite textured, dry, and rough as sandpaper. It took me between four and five hours to tend to my personal issue, in and out of the place in which I needed to care for that little obstruction. I have not worked that hard in, well, probably since I did the mountaineering type snow skiing. My legs are sore from assuming the position and the strain and I have a slight headache. I am surprised my stomach is not sore. I am solid there, if too that is where my fat collects. Well, my ears are still ringing powerfully. Push I did, 45 minutes at a time at least four times. Wouch.
Anyway, little else was done. As I got into that task, standing between efforts was rather uncomfortable, more so than simply sitting. I have rested since completing that task and will probably call it a night shortly. That was an amazing lot of work for such a little gain... or loss... depending on how you look at things. On the good side, I think I am becoming more active! That effort should kickstart Monday. If I can get to bed early enough, I might be able to get up early and begin dishes and laundry before too long, maybe taking a nap after. With the plans to go into town and then shooting in the afternoon, I could see the rest of the week becoming more active. We will see.
Eat, drink, and do so wisely. If you do not it will certainly get you in the end. I need to get the dishes washed and begin eating oats, cracked and flaked mixed grains, rice, beans, and meat again. I have incentive out the... Well, you know. No butts about it.
Awake, and with a little more motivation.
.
.
Not a lot will happen today. If I can do the dishes and a load or two of laundry I will be happy. The food left over from last night was not eaten, so it will add a little boost at some point during the day. As I see it, I do need a couple of larger containers for beans. I have enough freezer stuff, and could use some of that for the refrigerator, but prefer having a larger container for the refrigerator. I threw out a medium sized one, if by needs since it was not sealing, leaving me with rancid rice in a very short period of time. The huge one allowed the beans to go rancid as well, so had to go. Two more medium sized ones, with the one I have, would work well. Then, back to having beans and rice on tap most of the time, and merely keeping meat stocked to add to one, the other, or both of those and of course being able to eat those together as a simple easy meal once in a while. I need to begin implementing vegetables in too, and fruits occasionally as well, but one step at a time. So, tomorrow when I go into town, I will do a little more shopping.
My goal this month is to spend almost nothing beyond need. Bills, of course, food and gas enough to get into town. I can shoot, though I will be only shooting the .22s. All else, from here on out, is saving. I am not exactly sure what will be the first bigger ticket item, I will worry about that when I get there. I simply do not like living month to month, even if I am adding things that are marginally useful or might be good for trade. I have to focus. Heck, I do not even have a good multi-purpose ladder yet, but that is as it is. The only extra I will work on is long term storage foods, and only slowly, beyond what is required otherwise. Well, there might be one exception. I am seriously considering a pressure cooker. Simply put, that would reduce the time and effort involved with cooking beans and rice, making the probability of keeping that going higher.
By the way, adding food and some caffeine really helps. What surprises me though is how much high blood pressure medicines, and most other medicines offered, hurt. I become even more lethargic and essentially black-out. I cannot think on the stuff, I cannot complete any goals, I cannot eat... Everything, save perhaps the potassium pills, my doctors over the years have prescribed have caused serious faults in function. Further, when informed, they just suggest taking more. I really do wonder if this is known and wanted or if they simply do not care. Anyway, getting back to the feed bucket does help a bit. So, I need to find myself back to it. Especially the, really, humble but super foods that grains, dried beans, and whole rices provide. Meats, of course, and milk and cheese and other dairy products (if you can tolerate them) are superior foods as well.
I may try, this week, to push through at getting back on track. I am never really sure how to go about it. Setting goals is one way, but it is not sure. Eating helps. Having caffeine is good, but I think I need to add more water into my diet (and am). Every time I come up to the saddle on this particular horse, it is like I have never been here before. It really is, each time, like I have just been resurrected and am having to relearn the notion of having a body and will within flesh all over again. Frustrating as it is, that is what I have. Foolish or not, I keep getting back into the saddle and trying to ride as if I knew what I was doing.
I will admit, though, that this rest was, initially, very much needed. And, in spite of my grumps and complaints, it has not been bad. I had little money to do anything much, and I did continue to research (if much of that is lost, the memory in my mind really is not). There are a few smaller tasks I could complete as well, like filling the dirt back in over what had been my garden, setting up my reloading station, and checking on the hen house again. I kept spraying for wasps and no matter how well I sprayed, there continued to be wasps! Maybe, at this time of the year, they are dead. Maybe the last spray got them finally. I do not know. A little physical work, even a lot, is wonderful.
.
Not a lot will happen today. If I can do the dishes and a load or two of laundry I will be happy. The food left over from last night was not eaten, so it will add a little boost at some point during the day. As I see it, I do need a couple of larger containers for beans. I have enough freezer stuff, and could use some of that for the refrigerator, but prefer having a larger container for the refrigerator. I threw out a medium sized one, if by needs since it was not sealing, leaving me with rancid rice in a very short period of time. The huge one allowed the beans to go rancid as well, so had to go. Two more medium sized ones, with the one I have, would work well. Then, back to having beans and rice on tap most of the time, and merely keeping meat stocked to add to one, the other, or both of those and of course being able to eat those together as a simple easy meal once in a while. I need to begin implementing vegetables in too, and fruits occasionally as well, but one step at a time. So, tomorrow when I go into town, I will do a little more shopping.
My goal this month is to spend almost nothing beyond need. Bills, of course, food and gas enough to get into town. I can shoot, though I will be only shooting the .22s. All else, from here on out, is saving. I am not exactly sure what will be the first bigger ticket item, I will worry about that when I get there. I simply do not like living month to month, even if I am adding things that are marginally useful or might be good for trade. I have to focus. Heck, I do not even have a good multi-purpose ladder yet, but that is as it is. The only extra I will work on is long term storage foods, and only slowly, beyond what is required otherwise. Well, there might be one exception. I am seriously considering a pressure cooker. Simply put, that would reduce the time and effort involved with cooking beans and rice, making the probability of keeping that going higher.
By the way, adding food and some caffeine really helps. What surprises me though is how much high blood pressure medicines, and most other medicines offered, hurt. I become even more lethargic and essentially black-out. I cannot think on the stuff, I cannot complete any goals, I cannot eat... Everything, save perhaps the potassium pills, my doctors over the years have prescribed have caused serious faults in function. Further, when informed, they just suggest taking more. I really do wonder if this is known and wanted or if they simply do not care. Anyway, getting back to the feed bucket does help a bit. So, I need to find myself back to it. Especially the, really, humble but super foods that grains, dried beans, and whole rices provide. Meats, of course, and milk and cheese and other dairy products (if you can tolerate them) are superior foods as well.
I may try, this week, to push through at getting back on track. I am never really sure how to go about it. Setting goals is one way, but it is not sure. Eating helps. Having caffeine is good, but I think I need to add more water into my diet (and am). Every time I come up to the saddle on this particular horse, it is like I have never been here before. It really is, each time, like I have just been resurrected and am having to relearn the notion of having a body and will within flesh all over again. Frustrating as it is, that is what I have. Foolish or not, I keep getting back into the saddle and trying to ride as if I knew what I was doing.
I will admit, though, that this rest was, initially, very much needed. And, in spite of my grumps and complaints, it has not been bad. I had little money to do anything much, and I did continue to research (if much of that is lost, the memory in my mind really is not). There are a few smaller tasks I could complete as well, like filling the dirt back in over what had been my garden, setting up my reloading station, and checking on the hen house again. I kept spraying for wasps and no matter how well I sprayed, there continued to be wasps! Maybe, at this time of the year, they are dead. Maybe the last spray got them finally. I do not know. A little physical work, even a lot, is wonderful.
Last thoughts for the night.
.
.
Have you ever noticed how many people on television, guys, look like muscleheads? Seriously, from "construction workers" to the typical stars, six packs, quads, glutes, biceps, and triceps, all in perfect or larger order. You do realize that is not possible, right?
Having worked out and worked up in strength to near the end of the real scales of strength and form, minus any consumables which might enhance those parameters, I laugh when I see the hulk carrying out some lumber or batman exposing his torso. Even in my prime, I did not really have a six pack. The only guys I ever knew who had those were body builders. Both, as it turned out, used both roids and cocaine. Go figure.
I do wonder what is being used, these days, to gain muscle more quickly and to kill the pain of the mandatory aspects of bulking up. Steroids are still out there and being used, but the practice is in decline or they are finding ways around the urinalysis. The one advantage to cocaine as a painkiller is that it is out of the system rather quickly. Or, it used to be.
I have noted, as well, that there are a lot of deaths among even high school athletes. When a 16 to 24 year old athlete up and dies, it is not because he had a prenatal condition or had over worked in the short term. He took something to boost his abilities and was one of the small number to have it adversely affect his health. What amazes me more is when this happens, everyone says how sorry they are if quietly, the guy is shoved into a casket and then the ground, and the story dies before even that is done.
Another thing to mention, if you are spending 6 to 8 hours in the gym to gain the kind of muscle it takes to look big, you are doing precious little else. You do not have the capacity to become a lawyer, engineer, or doctor. Further, if you have those skills, you cannot actually use them well. Building the body to the level often seen means your body has no resources for advanced mental acuity. You, if not literally exhausted, are used up to go beyond working out. A shallow world indeed.
Yes, I do pick on women. I just thought a dose of reality about men was in order.
.
Have you ever noticed how many people on television, guys, look like muscleheads? Seriously, from "construction workers" to the typical stars, six packs, quads, glutes, biceps, and triceps, all in perfect or larger order. You do realize that is not possible, right?
Having worked out and worked up in strength to near the end of the real scales of strength and form, minus any consumables which might enhance those parameters, I laugh when I see the hulk carrying out some lumber or batman exposing his torso. Even in my prime, I did not really have a six pack. The only guys I ever knew who had those were body builders. Both, as it turned out, used both roids and cocaine. Go figure.
I do wonder what is being used, these days, to gain muscle more quickly and to kill the pain of the mandatory aspects of bulking up. Steroids are still out there and being used, but the practice is in decline or they are finding ways around the urinalysis. The one advantage to cocaine as a painkiller is that it is out of the system rather quickly. Or, it used to be.
I have noted, as well, that there are a lot of deaths among even high school athletes. When a 16 to 24 year old athlete up and dies, it is not because he had a prenatal condition or had over worked in the short term. He took something to boost his abilities and was one of the small number to have it adversely affect his health. What amazes me more is when this happens, everyone says how sorry they are if quietly, the guy is shoved into a casket and then the ground, and the story dies before even that is done.
Another thing to mention, if you are spending 6 to 8 hours in the gym to gain the kind of muscle it takes to look big, you are doing precious little else. You do not have the capacity to become a lawyer, engineer, or doctor. Further, if you have those skills, you cannot actually use them well. Building the body to the level often seen means your body has no resources for advanced mental acuity. You, if not literally exhausted, are used up to go beyond working out. A shallow world indeed.
Yes, I do pick on women. I just thought a dose of reality about men was in order.
Food!
.
.
Wow was I hungry. I got in to town and ordered food at probably the only place open tonight, a real Mexican fast food place. I ordered three hard shell tacos and a chimachanga. Unfortunately, I had never seen their chimachangas before. It was about a 10 inches long and 5 inche in diameter. It was, essentially, a deep fried mongo beef and been burrito. I made it through 2 of the tacos and 2/3rds of the chimachanga, barely. I went up to the counter, and without having to ask, was handed a to-go container. I almost think I saw the hint of a grin on his face. Then he looked over at how much I actually had eaten and his grin faded. Well, that is my story. Something about bearlike people that takes the grin away from some people. I bet I ate between two and three pounds of food. And several drinks. Well, not counting half the beans and rice that comes with the entrees.
I have that little bit left for tomorrow. If it makes it. Maybe, with what I ate tonight and ready food tomorrow, I might be able to do the dishes. Doing dishes might get me back on track to eating. That does little good in allowing me to be active and yet it is probably better somehow. I also purchased a 12 pack of caffeine. That will at least allow me to be awake a bit longer and perhaps more regularly.
On my way in to town, I called my friend. He had called twice today but I was sleeping. I know he stays up until 2:00 or 3:00, so if nothing else I thought it might be polite to call him back and at least offer him a meal. He suggested that he was done for the day but perhaps we could get together tomorrow or Monday and go shooting. So be it. I suggested Monday though, as I know tomorrow is going to be rough. I need a little ramp time to get up to speed for anything at the moment.
If I do little else, I do need to start getting my home ready for company. My lady friend will be arriving early next month and I do not want to have to clean everything up in the last week. I will need to do touch-ups then, but not the whole ball of wax. As well, I need to start walking. I plan to take her to some of the national and state parks. She will want to walk for miles and miles. I would rather be ready than gimping it the whole way. I do not know how much of either of these things I will get to, but they are on my short list.
Wheat will be checked into this month. I would like to get a hundred pounds, or so, at least. It depends on the price and what I have left in the bank after bills. I would like to get some for bucket storage and some for canning in #10 cans at the Mormon food bank. They have these devices and the grains for use there. Actually, since I am having troubles getting my butt into first, I may just buy what I am going to buy there, and let them teach me how to do it. At least I know that money earned by them in the way of profits is put to use helping the hungry and helping other preppers. A cause that pays for itself is not a bad cause, at least when one owns that cause.
I sure have been dark lately. I have not truly been in a bad mood, mind you. Nor is anything I have written new, mostly. Well, some of it is new in one sense, but like digging through an onion, is anyone really surprised there is a next layer? If not in a bad mood though, I have had a few more grumpy moments. I think that is just coming down from political overload that politics can bring. Since I am not a sports fan, my highs and lows from such affairs are more regional. Although I actually think my events are smaller than those who pray at the sports idles. And, unlike even many of them, I am not nearly vested in my "heroes" as they are. All fail before Christ, sometimes most notably Christians. Not that there should not be Christians, only that Christians (it is thought and wrongly) know better so should do better. This happens in my own mirror too. We seem hypocritical (until you note that Christ suggested He came because Father saw we could not do what was needed, none of us). Then it all goes back into alignment and on I go.
Blathering again. Well, off to... do something or other until I can crash again. Good night, probably... sometime... or not.
.
Wow was I hungry. I got in to town and ordered food at probably the only place open tonight, a real Mexican fast food place. I ordered three hard shell tacos and a chimachanga. Unfortunately, I had never seen their chimachangas before. It was about a 10 inches long and 5 inche in diameter. It was, essentially, a deep fried mongo beef and been burrito. I made it through 2 of the tacos and 2/3rds of the chimachanga, barely. I went up to the counter, and without having to ask, was handed a to-go container. I almost think I saw the hint of a grin on his face. Then he looked over at how much I actually had eaten and his grin faded. Well, that is my story. Something about bearlike people that takes the grin away from some people. I bet I ate between two and three pounds of food. And several drinks. Well, not counting half the beans and rice that comes with the entrees.
I have that little bit left for tomorrow. If it makes it. Maybe, with what I ate tonight and ready food tomorrow, I might be able to do the dishes. Doing dishes might get me back on track to eating. That does little good in allowing me to be active and yet it is probably better somehow. I also purchased a 12 pack of caffeine. That will at least allow me to be awake a bit longer and perhaps more regularly.
On my way in to town, I called my friend. He had called twice today but I was sleeping. I know he stays up until 2:00 or 3:00, so if nothing else I thought it might be polite to call him back and at least offer him a meal. He suggested that he was done for the day but perhaps we could get together tomorrow or Monday and go shooting. So be it. I suggested Monday though, as I know tomorrow is going to be rough. I need a little ramp time to get up to speed for anything at the moment.
If I do little else, I do need to start getting my home ready for company. My lady friend will be arriving early next month and I do not want to have to clean everything up in the last week. I will need to do touch-ups then, but not the whole ball of wax. As well, I need to start walking. I plan to take her to some of the national and state parks. She will want to walk for miles and miles. I would rather be ready than gimping it the whole way. I do not know how much of either of these things I will get to, but they are on my short list.
Wheat will be checked into this month. I would like to get a hundred pounds, or so, at least. It depends on the price and what I have left in the bank after bills. I would like to get some for bucket storage and some for canning in #10 cans at the Mormon food bank. They have these devices and the grains for use there. Actually, since I am having troubles getting my butt into first, I may just buy what I am going to buy there, and let them teach me how to do it. At least I know that money earned by them in the way of profits is put to use helping the hungry and helping other preppers. A cause that pays for itself is not a bad cause, at least when one owns that cause.
I sure have been dark lately. I have not truly been in a bad mood, mind you. Nor is anything I have written new, mostly. Well, some of it is new in one sense, but like digging through an onion, is anyone really surprised there is a next layer? If not in a bad mood though, I have had a few more grumpy moments. I think that is just coming down from political overload that politics can bring. Since I am not a sports fan, my highs and lows from such affairs are more regional. Although I actually think my events are smaller than those who pray at the sports idles. And, unlike even many of them, I am not nearly vested in my "heroes" as they are. All fail before Christ, sometimes most notably Christians. Not that there should not be Christians, only that Christians (it is thought and wrongly) know better so should do better. This happens in my own mirror too. We seem hypocritical (until you note that Christ suggested He came because Father saw we could not do what was needed, none of us). Then it all goes back into alignment and on I go.
Blathering again. Well, off to... do something or other until I can crash again. Good night, probably... sometime... or not.
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