Chores, and cats, at least.

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Not more, yet.  Hopefully more.  I think so.  Feeling better, just numb.  A bit shaken, from the level of pain felt earlier.  Literally, like palsey.  But minor, it will pass.  I haven't had the shakes from pain severity in a while now.  But I remember it well.

The animals were quite pleased to be fed and watered a second time.  It has been hit and miss lately, something is just off.  The girls, cats, get pretty well taken care of.  Even if I don't eat, they get fed and treated at least twice a day, and their litter is usually hit twice, once at least.  Usually.

I had brats, and sauerkraut.  I will probably have the last two from the package.  I also need to thaw more meat.  That was it.  Burger, a roast, more brats, and chicken?  Something like that.  I am still hungry.  A few more of those sausages should finish that though.

I have been looking for equipment to help with processing the ducks.  A cone would do, if I went the bleeding way.  Or, just cord for the feet, to let them hang, if I more snap their necks, then cut them to bleed.  I am not sure what size pot to get.  I am thinking 84 or 100 quarts, probably going with the 84 quart, with a basket.  Makes getting them in and out a lot easier, possibly doing two or three at a time.

I am thinking, two or three at a time is as much as I would want to do.  Even that will be a couple of hours of work, mostly plucking.  I may purchase plastic paint drop clothes, to tape to my folding table.  Hopefully strong enough to wash, dry, and store afterward... to last a few seasons anyway?  One can hope.  Plucking devices are being viewed.

To be honest, I am not sure there is a plucking machine or device which will work well with ducks.  Though, what I am seeing too, is people try to pluck ducks without scalding properly.  The water needs to be between 150 and 160, perhaps as high as 170 but not preferred.  And the ducks have to be soaked in that to get through to the skin.  Their feathers act as both water, and temperature, proofing.  It takes a while, and some testing, to get through those layers.  If it doesn't get to the skin, then scald that for a while, the feathers will not come out easily.  There are a few other tricks, but it is a lot of work, no matter the tricks involved.  It is more work than chickens.  Probably more than turkeys, pheasant, or other.  They are waterfowl, the others really aren't.

I have wondered about saving the feathers.  Not sure how practical or useful those are, how much even two dozen birds would provide, how easy it is to clean and then use those?  I hate to waste, but feather processing might be beyond me.  Heck, duck processing might be a bit advanced, or simply too much work, for me.  Will find out.

Initially, all I will have is a scalder, waterproof gloves, a rubber bib, and elbow grease.  I have, about, twenty ducks to process.  A few might be ready, but certainly not all.  Most are a couple weeks to a month away, still.  I will keep the mule hens, just for... less competition among the drakes.  And, perhaps they will still lay eggs?  I haven't been collecting eggs, but may get back to that, in time.

As well, decisions.  I want to keep the biggest animals, for breeding.  I don't care about color, I don't care about shape.  I want size.  So... the drakes will be checked, and probably weighed.  As will the hens.  While the smaller ones, initially, will provide less meat this year, culling with size in mind will lead to larger stock in the future.  I would hate to have to butcher a named drake, but... if he doesn't weigh in well, he'll have to go.  If it's close enough, I'll... give him, and me, a break.

Well, waterers were done.  And I am hoping to finish the dishes.  Perhaps restart some of the kefir.  Just two half gallon jugs, if I do.  Then, perhaps, in time, expand back out to four again.  Four seems to be a good source of keto food for me, if I can keep them in rotation.  It's... a bit of a trick.  If I can, I can cut a lot of other food expenses.  With cream coming in, for adding to coffee, and if I could get rabbits and ducks for a dozen meals a month, I'd be beginning to be much freer from the grocery store.  Will still need veggies of various sorts, since I can't keep up on a garden.  And will always want extra meats, for here and there.  But... a bit less reliant on the store is good.

Yea, I'll really try to hit dishes, start a load of laundry, get the trash and recycling out, get a shower, and maybe shave yet tonight.  Maybe.  Even being shaky, I am feeling enough better to try.  So try I will.  Later, or good night if I don't make it far.  Sleep well.

Strangely better.

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I can't say why.  The painkiller?  Just because?  Oh, a bit numb.  Whatever helped is continuing to help, but at a level beyond need?  Or... the need was excessive beyond my understanding.  You do realize that your body is a chemistry plant, don't you?  How do you think you survive terrible wounds, even lethal illnesses in my case?  My body is still pumping out something, something which makes even my skin numb.

For now, I'll gladly take it.  I wouldn't take any man-made stuff.  I'd rather suffer.  I just don't like the feelings, sensations, confusion.  Remember when my cousin cracked my ribs?  I took their painkiller a few times, three I think.  Then I stopped taking it.  I... just... couldn't, wouldn't, so didn't.  Hurt to breath, but better pain than that stuff.  If you have ever cracked a rib, let alone half a dozen of them, you... know... what pain is.  I did, and chose pain to that.

I haven't gotten to work yet.  I need food.  Not sure what I have.  I do have sardines, not quite up to that... or kipper snacks.  Yes, they are different, it's the type of fish.  Sardines are sardines, kipper snacks are made from mackerel.  Not holy mackerel, just mackerel.  I will look around for something.  Oh... perhaps bratwurts and sauerkraut.  That... might do.  The sauerkraut cuts the greasy excess of the brat and the brat fats sweeten the 'kraut.  It's a good call.

Oh, best feed the girls again.  Hmm, seems to be darkening out there?  No, it isn't.  And it is 74, but a warm 74?  Must be acclimating to the cooler weather.  Warm enough I opened up.  The house is, mostly, around 70.  I'll try to get some of that warmth in.  As well, I lit the grill while out checking.  It isn't darkening, it is just later in the day cycle, so seems like it.  Well, and there is a haze... part of the beginning or end of an inversion, plus the wildfires, who knows what else.  But, yeah... just a fall day.  A pleasant one, albeit.

Hopefully I will be able to get a few of the things on the list.  If terribly lucky, all of them.  Who knows.  Good afternoon and day.

I haven't hurt like this in a year or two?

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I kept trying to wake up, only to break through into a world of pain.  Mostly neck, shoulders, headache... migraine?  Yes, migraine.  The light hurt, sound hurt, vibrations from the fan hurt.  I wasn't nauseous, but that is only usually the case, not always.  Hurt, as if my bones had outgrown my skin.  Other things hurt, too, but they went mostly under the radar.

Why?  I can't say.  I did keep trying to adjust pillows, hoping that might help.  I had slept with the fan off, initially.  Turned it on later, when it seemed a bit warm.  It really wasn't, by temperature.  But I really like moving air while I sleep.  I am used to it.  To be honest, after a dozen wakes into shocking pain, I think I did find a more comfortable position.  And, would lose it.  I was rolling a lot?  That might have been it, but why?  

I eventually found a spot, which was the least painful, and kept it.  So was able to get some good sleep... better sleep.  I still woke in misery.  Beautiful, as painful as it gets.  Strange to call it beautiful, but... there you go.  I had hoped, as I got up and going, it would fade.

So far, not so much.  Still, I got to chores first thing, and was nice to all the critters.  Why be mean to them if your own body is the problem?  Logic doesn't always fit the bill, and it wasn't a part of my reasoning.  I just like the little critters.  They even, sort of, sometimes, like me back.  I understand their trepidation.  We all know the score, and any of them could be moments from dinner.  Even the seniors, if I think they... it is their time.

Cats next, feed, litter, some attention.  Sam kept visiting, Sassy visited once.  It wasn't nazels being blocked.  I don't know why.  Yesterday was bad, today is far worse.  The neck is out enough that it is causing a minor fever.  So very odd.  Still, I am not throwing in the towel.

A few acetaminophen just now.  It's been long enough that I forget they are there.  And with animals tended, I can begin work for the day.  I did hit the dishes, once, yesterday.  But that was it.  Not as bad as today, but rough.  I am hoping to finish those dishes, begin clearing counters (at least, maybe finish), and get trash and recycling gathered and out.  A shower, and maybe shave, in there.

If I can do those things, I am good.  Oh, maybe a load of laundry?  Just one, a small one, through.  Should be okay.  If I can.  Well, there is the nausea.  Sardines will fix that.  :p  Yeah, I... may have sardines.  Don't have much else to eat.  For the moment.  Anyway...  I'll try to do a few things.  Good afternoon and day, and for my part, morning.  Later.

Not quite thirteen hundred.

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Yes, late.  I tried to wake earlier.  Going as far as crawling out of bed at a quarter to ten.  I sat, where I dress for the day, but couldn't even sit well.  More sleep.  No choice.  So it went.  Sam arrived, at least once.  I didn't see Sassy, not sure why.  Didn't set the alarms, because they, currently, only complicate matters.

Even now, I am just on this side of awake.  It isn't even cold.  I think it was 68 or 69 upstairs, 70 in the main downstairs, though 66 in this front room.  But it doesn't feel cool, today.  Odd.  I have been eating.  A few smaller meals, cheese sandwiches of which there is enough for one more.  I need to shop.  As well, usually a larger meal in the evening.  I wonder how many calories are in a slice of cheese, a deli cut?  I'll have to look.  My usual meal is two of said sandwiches for one meal, and a single one for another.  The sandwich is comprised of two slices of cheese and three slices of deli meat.  Sometimes I have half a cup of raw baby carrots or broccoli and/or cauliflower.  But even that last is a one in four thing.  Rarely.  Still, it's... something.  Oh, and a fatted coffee, when I have it.  If even that is more like one in three meals.  Mostly just water, with my meals, these days.  Perrier, usually, plain.  Though, sometimes, tea.  Haven't lost an ounce.  Oh well.

I need to get going.  Chores, but actually dishes and a shower first.  Maybe a shave?  Yes, if I can.  The girls have had a morning treat, to buy me some time of solitude.  But they will begin begging, first one at a time, then in a tag team procession, then with both in here, at once, one at my feet, the other at my shoulder.  They should have gone into used auto sales.

Something was tic-tic-ticking.  I... couldn't think what it was.  I no longer have an analog clock.  Pretty sure it wasn't a bomb.  Ah... yesterday I remembered to stop the ceiling fan, and get it to spin in the other direction.  One way, it helps the place stay cool, the other, it helps it stay warm.  Or so they say.  Doest it work?  I don't know.  But... I like to think so.  My sensation of heat and cold is excessively finicky.  Yesterday, and/or the day before, these exact temps seemed frigid.  Today they seem just fine.  Is it the fan?  Have I, am I, adjusting?  Is it what I am wearing?  Taking?  Eating?  I... I just don't know.  But... I think so.  It would have no affect in this room, so... probably, possibly, a bit of several of those things?  Yes.

Before dishes and washing, a bit of looking around the web.  Good morning... urhm... make that afternoon, and day.

Out, all night.

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Wasn't sure we would be going.  It seemed cool.  And it is.  Just not that cool.  It was around 70 when we started.  It dropped to 55, then back to 56, down to 55, and so on.  It never dropped below 55, that I saw.  Strange how that works.  I can't say it was the land, perhaps higher ground.  Or, maybe, just a weather condition which held the temperature nearly static... clouds or a high... or low?  I... don't even think scientists actually know.

Can't really sleep yet, either.  Want to.  It just isn't happening.  I didn't do anything else earlier, so, maybe, dishes before bedtime... a shower... and a load of laundry to start?  I don't know.  It's the idea.  Not sure I can do it.  Still tired.  Not exhausted, just... blissfully restful.  Difficult to escapte this feeling.  Want to... will try.

I'd like to have everything set up for a shower in the morning, even if I take one tonight.  Clean clothes, and else, ready to go.  In case I can wake early enough to get out.  Even just grocery shopping.  And stopping at the health food store.  I am out of ground corriander, and I have so come to enjoy that simple spice.  It, along with a good salt, freshly ground pepper, sometimes with onion and or garlic powder, and occasionally ghost pepper, regular pepper flecks, and chipotle.  I like mixing the heat, for a variety of flavors and heat... more rounded.  Prettier.  *cat call whistle*  I love me some proper spicing.  Oh, I need onion powder too.  I don't trust those from general grocery stores.  They do have organic, but it is both overpriced, and still probably from China.  Bleh.  No!

It was a pleasant day.  I got the chores done twice.  The girls have been well fed, their water recharged fresh again two days in a row now, and their litter cleared and refreshed.  Treats and pets, lap time and else.  I... do my best.  They put up with me.  It's... as good as I can do, and I think they, of all "people", know.  I wish more did.  Truly.  Though, for many, trying doesn't matter.  Only results.  And, I get that too.

On to... something.  Good night.

Something is just wrong.

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Moving slowly.  Not responding.  I set alarms, to get going, and don't even hear... remember hearing... them.  I've set the alarm three times and can't remember one going off.  That... isn't lazy.  Something is just not working.  I think it is the cool.  It was 66 in this room this morning, 70 in the rest of the house, because the furnace is there to catch it.

I did dress warm.  Warmer.  Long sleeves would help.  Hmm, I have a pleasant fleece jacket around here somewhere.  Technically, part of my layering systems.  A midweight.  It isn't waterproof or windproof, but good under one, the other, or a double duty shell, or heavier coat if it all goes hard cold.

Still, I... feel warm enough.  But as summer fades, so too do I.  I don't think it is quite seasonal, in the way psychopathogens try to introduce it.  It is merely a fading of capacity.  It has nothing to do with mood, it is biological.  Which is why extra lighting really won't help.  I do understand hibernation.  Would, if I could.  Turtles, bears, fish, reptiles of other sorts... is a turtle a reptile?  I... think so.  I used to go down.  Based a bit on weather, a bit on the strenght of the sun.  Both are goind cold, and fast.

Just because I am failing doesn't mean I have to quit.  I may, for a bit, quit, before long.  It becomes painful to even try.  I have some things I really need to get done, though.  And there are things I really have to do.  Hollow inside, dead feeling, lost, weak, tired, sore, pained... I have... things to do.  The animals must be fed.  And, sometimes, even I have to eat.  And eat enough to... cycle the system.  Or I get all stoved up.

I best get on to something.  Maybe.  I hope.  Later.

Up, if late.

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Right to it, if not what I had hoped as a first thing.  Chorese, and cats.  Fed and watered.  Litter remains to be cleared.  But there is always something.  The animals are hungry.  Always.  Terribly.  I think the teen hungers of a lot of them drive the adults to famine.  Out of competition, literal or virtual?  Or just herd instinct?

I had hoped to do dishes first, then take a shower, maybe shave.  Take a break, then hit chores.  But being that it was after noon, I decided chores first was best.  I am hoping to conclude, or begin concluding, my final bits of business today.  Or... not.  The hope is there.  So tired.  Nothing hurts this morning.  Not sure what happened to the pain.  But, for now, mostly, it is gone.  I feel the edges of a headache.  There are other possible problems.  Like clouds on the horizon, so far, they are just... possibilities.  Maybe probabilities?  Difficult to say which of those, as my seasons are intractable.

Dishes, too, need to be hit, probably finished.  Then a shower and shave.  Hopefully more, nearing the end, dishes into the cleaning process.  Maybe laundry too.  I'll keep at it.  I am getting ahead, again, finally.  If very slowly.  So it goes.  It is just 70 out there, maybe 72?  Something in there.  I have the front door open, because it was 66 in here, to start.

Dressed slightly more warmly this morning.  That will probably be the way forward.  Though I need to find a few more long sleeve t's or hoodies.  Just cotton, or cotton-poly, not anything weird or fancy.  Anything to use less fuel for heating, I guess.  Later.

Nah, not much more.

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I do know I need to, possibly, get to town soon.  The problem is the last time I was out my tires were low.  My vehicle was one of the first with a stupidwarning.  It doesn't say which tire, or all, or how much.  It only puts on a dumblight if one, or all, are below pressure.  Best to take a look, but I was pretty much to town when it came on.  And they looked good enough.  So I just finished and returend.

I have a cordless air compressor.  It worked as advertised.  One tire, the rear left, driver side, was down by 8.  At 27, it didn't really look low.  I keep them at 35, am considering pumping them just a bit higher in the winters.  Not sure, yet, but... a notion of a possibility I must research.  The other tires were all either 33 or 33.5.  The device was easy to use, and the process was quick and painless.

I looked all over the tires for the marking of the highest pressure, the max.  It was never, explicitly, given.  It was passively suggested, as I see things.  It can go to 50psi, but 35 (which wasn't give at all) is what the vehicle recommends (if that was for stock tires, which these aren't).  Still, I do believe they were set at 35psi, recommended, as well.  Why don't they write that on the tires, in easy to see formats?  Still, I got the tires aired up.

I couldn't find my pressure gauge, any of them.  The device has one built in.  Even so, I prefer to test.  If nothing else, a double check.  I... prefer to check tire pressures manually.  I don't trust digital things all that much.  Still, it is good, in a pinch, to not need one.  Need has little to do with things, always.  Tradition?  Or... just... a double check, front and back?  Something.

I also checked in on my friend.  It seems he did quit early.  It dipped below 50, to 46 I think he said.  There are spots where it does get colder.  All valleys, even on the plains, depending on weather patterns, wind channels, and else... there are spots which are colder, sometimes static, sometimes changing.  It was still 52 here, but we are a bit higher?  Well, we aren't a low spot, near water?  I think that is more it.  And where we are situated is warmer in the winter, and cooler in the summer, than on either wall of the valley.

I would have thought, being out in the middle of it, we would be colder.  But the winds are much less of a factor in a major cauldron like valley, of, say, 50 to 70 miles by 30 miles?  Roughly, and mostly.  We have mini-titty mountains inside of the valley itself.  It's... a strange place.  But, with no real wind, the snow likes to pile along the mountain sides, while the sun burns those in a strange way.  Or... that is what I believe to be the cause.  Who... really knows.

Oh, on to... something.  I'd like to hit the dishes, once, anyway.  And refill waterers while at it.  I won't finish the dishes.  That'll have to wait until tomorrow.  Hopefully first thing.  Then a shower, and maybe shave.  Chores, and counters?  Something.  Ugh...  Good night.

She is home.

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My mother is home.  I called earlier, to check.  No answer.  So I gave her a call just a bit ago.  It sounds like she is doing well.  She is home.

She overdid today, getting things reset, sorted, and all today.  I expected she would.  There are always so many things to do when one returns from an extended stay.  She had a little helper.  Little?  A young lady, I don't know her age anymore.  She skipped school, or they didn't have school, and showed up to help.  One day a week, she suggested, to help with anything she might need.  Very good.

She is a fighter too.  She fights differently, but well.  I suspect she will do well this time.  Her fellow is helping her set up medicine, and that will help her keep on it.  Her appetite is good.  And her wanting to be home is strong.  Set up, for the day.  And for a while.  She will be going out to stay with her friend again soon, as well.  After she has her house arranged.  Which, actually, is his house.  Yea.  His other house.

I haven't done much.  It is so cool.  It is taking the legs out from under me.  I am hoping, yet, to do more.  And, think I may.  I may have to begin dressing much warmer.  It went from being in the 80s just a bit ago, to just barely making it to 70, or not quite, recently... as highs.  This really is cool.

As well, I will stop opening the upstairs window, except at bedtime.  Closing that up during the day might help keep the house warmer, and gather what of the sun is possible up there, and in the attics.  Tricks, and processes, attempts at this and that.  Nothing is ever sure.

Yeah, hitting the dishes at least once... doing at least some clearing of the counters... starting in on some laundry...  Nothing fancy, just starts and continuations.  So tired, though, and cold.  I have the furnace up to 74.  I... am going to try to just dress warmer.  Hmm, I need some long sleeve tees.  Desert Cat got roughly talked me into buying a few.  And, honestly, they are amazing.  I just need a few more.  Hooded are really good.

I did contact the driver.  He is going, still, but had a friend ask to go tonight.  All good.  So he is still going out.  How long he will run is a different story.  Still, perhaps another night, tomorrow night.  Maybe through the week.  As mentioned, nothing is for sure.

Hmm... yes.  Those things, perhaps, and a shower too.  I'll have to hit the dishes to begin a shower.  At least clean them a shot, then set them aside.  Later.  Possibly good night.  Not sure I'll be back on.  

Up, and at it!

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I thought it was earlier.  But, I got right to it.  Chores are done, litter was cleared, cats fed.  That was about all I had it in me to do.  But, I did it quickly, this morning.  Oh, something is still wrong, it hurts... pretty much everywhere.  But I have gotten used to this particular cross again.  Nothing to do about it anyway, so... best just get on with things as possible.

And, yesterday, I cleared off the stovetop, finished all dishes which had been set up, and have another group of dishes waiting to be done this morning, or today anyway.  Plus, the freezertop is completely cleaned and cleared, and remains so, waiting for whatever groups of dishes may arrive to air dry.  I air dry dishes as much to let them truly finish drying as to give me a soft break before putting them away.  

Oh, I even found a place for my au gratin boats... they are, say, nine and an half by four and three quaters, and probably an inch and an half to two and an half deep?  something like that.  Perfect for three eggs, a dozen or two tiny flourets of broccoli, cheese(s), and a few shredded deli meats, and such.  You could load up or go lean, and this will have you covered.  Still, a home had to to be made for them.  So it was needed, so it got done.

Today?  More dishes.  Restart packing.  Counters in the kitchen.  A start back on laundry.  Chores later.  And maybe begin hitting boxes?  I nearly cleared the bathroom hallway... at least of smaller boxes.  I suppose I could try to finish clearing that, too.  Who knows.  But, work.  More work.  Things to do.

I have all but one business arrangement managed... taxes... on autos and house?  I'll try to do it online, if possible.  Today, or... this week anyway.  But I think the cars have been changed, to different months.  But I need a tax exemption paper, both to deal with property taxes and the autos, when they come up.  Not sure how to do this all online.  Will be sorting it.

I had been eating bread with cold cuts, because I thought I was out of cheese, not quite.  So, back to cheese.  Bread actually... isn't as tasty as cheese.  It does add a lot of bulk, but a flat bulk.  It's like adding cardboard to the rest, really.  I do need, also, to do grocery shopping, and pick up more feed.  Gah!  But they eat so much!

Some of it.

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A very slow day.  But, spots of work, here and there.  The first load which was drying, of dishes, was put away.  The second load was washed, again, rinsed, and set to dry.  It, too, now, is away.  A shower was taken.  Then more dishes were set to go.  I did have to clean the freezer top again.  As well, feeding the girls, and tending their litter.

Chores haven't been completed yet.  Next.  Just hopped out of the shower, want to dry off a bit first, before dressing.  Then I'll get to chores.  Yea, late, slow, etc.  It's... what I can do.  Haven't even been up to playing my game.  I have been completely focused on doing my list of things.

I called, to check if mosquito treatments would happen tonight.  Not sure, was the reply.  As cool as it was last night?  Still, I haven't, yet, been out to even check the temperature today.  I have no more clue than the man on the moon.  Can't spray for them below 50 F.  They go to ground, so the insecticide doesn't affect them.  Only critters in the air will be killed.  Which is why, also, they wait until sundown to spray, so as not to kill bees.  I had no idea bees were daytime only creatures.  Some could say it makes sense, but... no.  It... just is.  I doubt if most of what we think makes sense has anything to do with what we propose.  Some?  Maybe, or partly.  But... much more rarely than we think.  As too often they think with their heart... or other parts.  Not reliable, assuming they haven't been bribed, corrupted, blackmailed, etc.  Which... I don't.  Actually, I assume every single study has been given a conclussion before a single theory was tested.  By the Chinese, US, or EU governments, for or even against their own interests.  The right and left hands really don't know what they other is doing, and neither are doing the right things.

Although, it seems the king's new clothes are just as shiny and bright as the king's old clothes.  Some suspect the king won't bail out his tailor, and he may well not.  But I tell you, the difference is nil.  It was baked into the cake, and nothing to be done about it at this point.  Trying to blame the type of capitalism, crony, that he and the US Lehman Brothers created is simply not applicable.  They were allowed to run, by the prospective governments.  Even enhanced and given get out of prison free chits.  At this point, corrections aren't going to work.  Bail them, don't, imprison the elites or don't, hell... kill those responsible... if don't forget about the bureaucrats if you are going to go that way...  It just simply doesn't matter when they were always just puppets of the state.  Like it or not, suffering, probably global, is on the way.

It seems the US just exported a fraudulent business practice.  China thought they were so sneaky, in breaking into the US cookie jar and grabbing the easy way to money.  There isn't a real estate, manufacturer, or economic influencer/trader which is legitimate in China.  Can't print gold, can't copy success.  Funny how things work out.  Now all they need is for Three Gorges Dam to fold, and they... will be back to scrubs.  Not sure if that will happen, but it certainly is a possibility.  Of course, the US has become a snake's den of economic ruinousness.  We make nothing, break everthing.  We are destructive, economically.  Our business model is making money out of money, in a way that is impossible and unsustainable.  It's a fiction.  I can't wait for the falling bankers.  And it is coming.  Here, there, everywhere.  Hopefully bureaucrats go with them.

Hmm?  Oh, right.  Not really grumpy, just noticing.  Later.

Awake, again.

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A bit better this morning.  I had a few things to do, which had backed up.  I hit the dishes, finally.  They are clean, just getting a rinse as I try to wake and get on to a shower.  Oh, I should put the clean dishes away, the ones out on the freezer... create space for the newly washed dishes.  As well, more dishes will go in after a shower.

It got down to 66 upstairs, with a single window open and a single fan on low.  At some point it went up to 68, but hen, by the time I woke, was down to 66 again.  Odd.  The furnace kept the downstairs at 70, but the front room was rather chilly.  It is even now just at 67.  I haven't checked outside, but I'd guess it is really cool.  This is more like October.  Almost more like November.  It's looking to be a cold winter, if this is any indication.  My mother suggests it is really cooling down out there, too.

Chores... but before or after a shower?  Am I staying awake, or going back for more sleep?  No, I am trying to stay awake.  Dry dishes, rinsing dishes, a shower... cat litter and feeding... a bit of time down, as I am still a bit weary, and those things will tire me.  Then on to chores.  As well, a few other things today.  Always something about something.

Oh, if I could get to the store, that would be good.  Nothing fancy.  Just cheese slices, perhaps packages of deli cuts, eggs for now, gruyere cheese... maybe a small bit of gorgonzola... for a rare stronger bite.  Both of those to be bubbled on top, under the broiler...  I think that would be best for them.  Oh, and more salad fixings.  That's a fairly good way to go about it, the family pack.  Sure, it is iceburg lettuce, but... after extensive reconsideration, and in all honesty?  There just isn't enough difference between romaine and iceburg lettuce to bother.  One is greener, perhaps prettier.  But both are pretty much water, with only mass... bulk, not roughage, to push through the system.  So be it.  This costs less, far less, is already prepped, has carrots, red cabbage bits, cucumber slices, and tomatoes in with it.  The packaging makes it last a week, if one closes it and returns it to the first quickly.  Can't beat it.  Goes good with leftover meats, hamburger crumble, or even a simple can of tuna.  Check.

Well... I best get going.  I was late to feed the critters yesterday, and fed them only once.  Not today.  I do my best, some days... once will be all, and late at that.  Hoping to figure out culling, before long.  Just one, to see how it goes, first.  Getting the feathers off will be the trick.  A hen, to start.  If the drakes don't get much bigger soon, one of those before long.  If I can get the process down, I may do three or four a day, or as many as reasonable for a one-man band.  I should end up with, say, twelve to fifteen birds.  Some of the hens will be kept.  I'd still like to find a good home for a few, but I don't think most want anything to do with... anything.  They just want to buy at the store.  Many would rather eat at McDonalds, or anywhere else.  I get it.  But that... whole edifice is about to come down.  I realize I won't be able to keep my animals.  Thieves, the hungry, even here.  People who, now, despise someone for eating small cute animals will ravage these cute little things and kill anyone who tries to get in their way.  The world is never what it seems, and the sheep are often, truly, not just not sheep... for none are... but are not even just wolves, eating of the fruits of vegetation and meats, but ravenous animals who know not themselves.  Pray for them, and yourself that you shouldn't become such.  I do.  I do.  Amen.

Well... on to dishes... then a shower and drying time.  Good morning and day.

I hurt, and wanted to sleep.

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So it went all day.  The shower didn't help.  I wonder if having Sassy up there disturbed my rolling, which then caused my neck to be out, and back, which caused the headache?  Probably.

I just got to chores.  I kept hoping the pain would ease, that I would wake a bit.  Had to refresh duck feed, which is a 150 pound task.  I didn't want to do it.  I was also almost certain the kits would be dead.  I expected them to be dead yesterday.  Finally, I got out and got the feed put in, then fed the ducks and started in on the rabbits.

Sure enough, the little ones were dead.  Probably cold, she just didn't want anything to do with them.  Wouldn't go in with them.  Oh well.  Makes me wonder if any of them will do well.  There are two more, potentially, pregnant.  And I may breed two of the big does.  Just little ones, so far.  So far, to no good ends.  And timers and watching the calendar does no good, when they can be so late, and further leave no clue they are about to deliver.  Even checking twice a day doesn't necessarily mean it will work out.  They die so quickly out in a bare cage.  Ugh.

The pork, with sauerkraut, wasn't bad.  I wouldn't call it splendid, but it was okay.  A shower earlier was nice.  I had hoped it would relax the muscles, ease the aches and pains.  No such luck, but I did get clean.  It is 48 out there, or was at about 20:00, give or take a bit.  The warmest I saw it today was 58.  Very cool, even for this time of year.

I did call, and connect, with my brother.  He isn't really insterested in talking.  He talked a bit.  Still, he does have a lot on his plate.  Little of it, at the moment, anything his actions led into.  Gums are still sore.  Life is still a bit overwhelming.  And, while everyone expects them to go his way, they leave it in his hands.  As... is often the case.

I'll try to get ready.  But I have limits too, especially with this recent fall.  Meh.  I'll do what I can.  It'll get done, what can, and has to be done.  Later, or more likely good night.

Awake.

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Early, or well, later but early enough.  I think around 09:00.  Had a tough time waking before that.  Woke around 6:45, then every half hour to hour after.  Simply couldn't wake until nine or a bit after.  Someone rang the bell, twice.  I wasn't showered, dressed, ready, so I didn't answer.

I looked out, as they were leaving, but couldn't tell who it was.  A nice truck, white, newer(?I believe), with tools in the bed... shovels, and other such.  I called the two who it might have been, that I know.  But, nope.  So, no clue.  No message left.  I wish I had been up to answering the door.  If nothing else, I like to know.

Showered, finally.  Dishes back in for another soak.  I need to do waterers, and then chores.  I want to see how the baby bunnies are doing.  I keep fearing I will find them dead.  It got really cold last night, down to 37 or 38, but that was at midnight.  It might have gotten even colder.

I have the furnace set to 70, and it kept the back rooms that temp.  But this front room was down to 65, without any way to heat it.  It is up to 70 at around nearing 14:00.  The upstairs, with the door open, and a window open, plus fans, was at 70, 71 near me.  Sassy slept with me most of the night, crawling under the blankets, down by my knees.

I miss when I can't let the girls up, for this or that reason.  Sam visited a time or two, but didn't stay.  Her choice.

A trim, the beard, mostly, is gone.  I need to shave eventually.  May grow it out this winter.  It was actually comfortable this time, not so dang itchy.  And, more full.

Hmm... now to make something to eat.  Perhaps heat some of the pulled pork.  Not sure what to eat with it.  I have some sauerkraut from the jar I have been using remaining.  That might not be bad.  And it is very keto friendly.  Eat, then do waterers, then hit chores.  Oh... I need to bring more grain, for the birds.  They sure can eat.  Later.

So far, so good.

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The kits are still alive.  I have never seen mom in with them, but if she wasn't, they would be dead from the cold.  It is already down to 50 outside.  And it has been a day, and more, since they were born on top of it.  If she wasn't tending them, they would all be dead.  They just don't live long without serious care and some warmth.  I just wish she would stay in with them.  I have extra food and water for her, I don't know what else to do.

As well, my mother called.  As release date arrives, she is starting to get a little nervous.  She did say, if she needs me, she will call.  Though, at best, it will take two days for me to get there.  So I will begin, again, setting up my gear to go on short nortice.  I had ordered a few things for the trip, and was partly into packing.  So it should be easy.  Of course, that means, I need to pick up the pace on cleaning the house, too.

I made chicken, again.  I really hit it right.  So juicy, with skin just perfectly crisped.  Done through and through.  Amazing chicken.  I do have three pieces left, so will warm those shortly.  As well, I am warming the grill, again, in order to slow cook a pork roast for the week.

I will tamp the heat down to somewhere in the 280 to 320 range, about as accurate as my grill gets, then let it cook for... probably... three hours, then spike the heat for the last half hour to hour.  Then wrap it in foil and let it rest for half an hour, or until it is cool enough to pick apart.  Pork is one meat which holds smoke well, over time.  Beef can, say a brisket.  But a grilled/smoked steak, in my opinion, has to be eaten immediately after a three to five minute rest.  Chicken as well, has to be eaten as soon as it is cool enough to eat.  I'll see if reheating, from room temp, after smoking a bit earlier, is okay for chicken.

The ducks keep believing I will feed them again.  They have been fed twice, so... no.  I will check on momma one more time, before bedtime... in an hour or two.  She still looks rather traumatized.  Poor thing.  I suppose there is a reason for neurosis.  :p  Hopefully, as she improves, regains strength and else, life will get easier.  I have been doing extra interaction with her, lately.  So as, hopefully, to make any handling of her babies necessary not be a shock or trauma.  She has my scent on her, so them having it, hopefully, won't be an issue.  So far it seems to have worked out.  She hasn't killed them, or seeming abandoned them.  Yet.  Ugh.

Later, or good night.

Oh noes!

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While watching yt vids, I realized my friend is...

Better, if still slightly rough.

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The neck is still out, a slight headache remains, exhaustion and a weariness which remain... if becoming boringly familiar these last weeks... months really.  Internals don't feel bad, if they are still a bit off?  Something.  Still, considering how bad it gets, this is... a more pleasant form of suffering.

I went to bed at about 00:30, waking a quarter to eight?  Up earlier today, for no good reason.  May need a nap before long.  I am leaving the door open, so the girls are visiting.  And, around sunup until I get up, they... make sure I don't sleep tight.  *grins*  Oh, it... can get my ire up.  When it does, they know how far they have to be for me not to grab them and irritate them for a while.  Oh, no hurting, just hugging.  Oh no!  The great ape caught me!  Although, once in a while, they think I am more asleep than they thought, or have to come a little too close.  Doesn't every poppa grab a daughter, give her whisker burns, and enjoy the capture?  Aye.

They did help, but it still took an hour or two.  Sometimes I appreciate their efforts, sometimes not so much.  This morning I was mixed about it.  Still, we actually had a pretty good morning.  I didn't have to kidnap, catnap?, them.  They came over for itches, petting, and such, and meowed in great joy.  Sassy was especially happy to get some attention, Sam was more jealous than anything.  All good.

I don't know what the temp is out there.  It was 73 upstairs, at least near me, with the windows open and fans going.  I am hoping to hit chores soon, I just don't want to walk out into a harshly cool morning.  As well, I fear all the kits will be dead.  Mother seemed to want nothing to do with them.  I did what I could, including putting her in with them.  She wouldn't stay.  I don't want to deal with it, but will have to before long.

I am hoping to do more today.  But that has been the hope for a while.  If I can do something today, it will be tearing down boxes in this front room.  That... is all I am going to plan.  If anything else happens, great.  If not, if I can just do this one thing.  Oh, well, getting trash out.  But I think I have it mostly out already.  I just need to get the bin to the curb.  A trim, shower, and shave would be nice too.

Good morning and day.