.
.
I finally got in touch with my Mom, to give her the hotel information and to make sure the dates and such where copasetic. She took down the information and said she was looking forward to seeing me this coming weekend. WHAT? I was sure I had arranged for not this but next weekend. So, we went to our calenders, checked the holiday, I went to my email to see about the dates to which the lodging had agreed, and then we compared notes. Yes, no, there... Ah! It is all good. I simply thought the thing was a week further out then what it is. So, next Saturday I will be on my way to Colorado and I will not need to reschedule anything. I can ill afford it, but then again, who knows. I sometimes fret over things I should not, moneywise, or really anywise. Then again, sometimes I do not fret enough and... well, yeah.
I made dinner, a breakfast dinner, then sat down to eat. I did this just as a matter of action, without thought. I then looked at my plate. Three fried eggs (jumbo), 2 sausage patties (about 2 to 3 ounces, cooked, each), and a potato I had left from my last baking incident cut into rounds, plus a 16 ounce glass of milk (well, really 14 ounces otherwise it is too full to move). Hmm, I could cut down to two eggs, I suppose. That would not kill me, probably. And, maybe one patty of sausage. Yes, that could do me no harm, mostly. And perhaps only half a potato, that one will hurt, but, I am a man you know. Oh fine, maybe 8 ounces of milk. *sigh* They might have a point. But then again, I only eat once or twice a day.
I would love to eat more often, and I would add veggies, but I really do not have the capacity in: cooking gear (or storage space for my cooking gear really); or in the ability to get to the store to keep up on produce; or in my ability to cook and clean from such. Fresh produce and fruit goes bad fast. Produce is often only sold in portions I could not really eat fast enough. I tried keeping fresh produce on hand when I cooked for my last gal. Even with her helping, and me trying to use it all, it would often go bad. I probably threw more food away, and it IS expensive and more so now, when I was trying to cook for her, than most people eat and throw away in the same time period due to her demand for fresh everything. Unless you run a restaurant, it is not feasible. Then again, I would guess they throw a LOT of food away as well, but since they can add that cost into what is sold, they do not lose money. Still, I am looking at ways and means of changing some things.
My bible reading continues. I was not two books before Titus as I had thought. I am still not there. I am just start 1 Thessalonians. But that and the next book seem quite short. Paul can be interesting to read, though often he repeats himself from previous letters too. I sometimes have to remind myself just who Paul was, and how he came to be writing these letters. If you believe, which I do, it is quite profound. He was a man who persecuted Christians and did it so well that the Jewish leaders gave him writs to travel and persecute in distant places. That he was blinded by light and heard Christ, who told him where to go for healing and what to do after that, it is amazing. It is not quite as amazing as Christ's resurrection or works, but it is quite a thing.
I do see why, purely based on logic and without seeing such miracles today personally, many do not believe. As well, 2000 years and counting is a long time. Many at that time thought the end times was quite near. They thought, literally, that at any moment Christ would return. I am sure many who marginally believe take that into account when they sit the fence. I wonder, at this time and while reading, how long before Christ that he was prognosticated? Was it Abraham who was given the promise of an heir who would show the way, first? Or where there even earlier, or more clear, or even less clear promises of a Christ? I will have to dig into that in time.
And, for my own part, if I have a heretical notion (if not a prominent one, just a thought) it would be to wonder if the end of man comes when each of us dies of flesh. Could it be that Christ really will not return? No, I know. But it is a nagging thought. Perhaps Christ only meant for us to live righteously and in faith, and that the end times were just alluding to our own deaths. I cannot know, for certain. And, in the majority, I do not believe that, but it is back there, kicking around and making a lot of noise.
Faith is difficult. Even for one who has it in spades, my ability to know what is sure and what is real and what is merely a notion is limited. Christ admitted that He did not know all that the Father knows, only what He was taught and told, to include not knowing when He would return (so maybe if He even would return). Only the Holy Spirit has delved God in such a fashion so as to know the depths of the Father. Having had a faithful father, a foster father, who was a Presbyterian minister who had a doctorate in theology, I know that men of great learning and great faith will also always have questions, doubts, and issues with understanding and differentiating facts of the bible from other forms of notions within the book(s). So it will be. More the reason to look deeper I should think.
I am off to no good, or to reading the bible. Hmm, some choice. Depending on who I might be speaking with or writing for, there might not really be a choice (on their part) about that first sentence. Weird but true.
Have a good day. Maybe even good night.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
A day of rest.
.
.
I can do little today, though it is nice and cool outdoors. I simply have no energy. One of the apartments had a party that lasted until 5:00 this morning, which did not help. Next time the police will be called. I did not get to sleep until 4:00, at all, though I tried. And then I had to wake to call the hunters safety shoot guy and reschedule my shoot. It sounds like I do not have to hit the bullseye, I only need to hit within the rings, and only half of my shots. I believe I could do that but since I could not sleep, I was neither trusting of my ability this morning and I was too tired to get moving as well.
But, that is fine. I do not mind shutting down a bit on the weekends. I might do some minor transfers from boxes and bags here at the apartment, getting them to storage, and then looking over what else I might prepare for over there. I want to make my move as easy as possible, light loads of clothes, bedding, and other minor essentials. Oh, I need to remember my dolly, both for weights and to help with the removal of my neighbors old television. I may be slow, but I do get it done, eventually.
I set up reservations for my Mother and myself for the family reunion in Greeley. I am nervous about money, but it is an obligation and it should be fun too. I tried to call her earlier to give her the address and phone number but she is otherwise detained it seems. She will be driving out to help my brother move, but not until later in the month or even next month. My brother's wife got the job in Texas, a bit to my surprise. I continue to keep them in my prayers.
Well, I am hungry. I think I will cook ribs and figure out what else to eat. Or, maybe just some water. I should do some more cleaning though. The bathroom, living area, and kitchen are good, but I need to vacuum and prepare what is to be taken to storage. Then again, a couple of eggs and a two sausage links would be good. Water, I do not think, will cut it.
Have a good day!
.
I can do little today, though it is nice and cool outdoors. I simply have no energy. One of the apartments had a party that lasted until 5:00 this morning, which did not help. Next time the police will be called. I did not get to sleep until 4:00, at all, though I tried. And then I had to wake to call the hunters safety shoot guy and reschedule my shoot. It sounds like I do not have to hit the bullseye, I only need to hit within the rings, and only half of my shots. I believe I could do that but since I could not sleep, I was neither trusting of my ability this morning and I was too tired to get moving as well.
But, that is fine. I do not mind shutting down a bit on the weekends. I might do some minor transfers from boxes and bags here at the apartment, getting them to storage, and then looking over what else I might prepare for over there. I want to make my move as easy as possible, light loads of clothes, bedding, and other minor essentials. Oh, I need to remember my dolly, both for weights and to help with the removal of my neighbors old television. I may be slow, but I do get it done, eventually.
I set up reservations for my Mother and myself for the family reunion in Greeley. I am nervous about money, but it is an obligation and it should be fun too. I tried to call her earlier to give her the address and phone number but she is otherwise detained it seems. She will be driving out to help my brother move, but not until later in the month or even next month. My brother's wife got the job in Texas, a bit to my surprise. I continue to keep them in my prayers.
Well, I am hungry. I think I will cook ribs and figure out what else to eat. Or, maybe just some water. I should do some more cleaning though. The bathroom, living area, and kitchen are good, but I need to vacuum and prepare what is to be taken to storage. Then again, a couple of eggs and a two sausage links would be good. Water, I do not think, will cut it.
Have a good day!
Fine, now that I have had my temper tantrum...
.
.
I decided to begin research regarding diabetes. In particular, I looked for information regarding nutrition and meal planning. Now, I can probably get ideas there, but my meals will have to be customized in any event. Doing a simple check on nutritional needs for my age, weight, height, and such, if I remain pretty much comatose I need well over 3,300 calories, and some say as high as 4,100 calories, per day to stay even. Sure, I could stand to lose weight, but I think trimming more than 25% of those calories would be a maximum event. Even that might lead to an end to any proper eating practice. So 3 ounces of meat really will not do.
The problem is, I really have no capacity of food preparation to that level of sophistication. I do not live regularly, and up to this time, have not been able to do so. As such, meal planning might as well be walking on the moon. I will not be able to have 3 squares and snacks of my own accord. What I can do, though, is gather the types of foods recommended and see how they will fit with my life. It has to be custom anyway, might as well shift their design into my paradigm. Then again, there is cost. Even the sites I visited suggested the food choices may be quite expensive and books and recipe books add up, there are many of them (to include programs), and knowing which one will work best (for me especially) is as daunting as the process itself.
There are other complications. A suggestion was to eat an ounce of nuts as a superfood. Urhm, cool. You mean I need to measure out such items either each time I eat them or premeasure everything as soon as I get it? Again, complications that do not seem feasible. As I sit here writing, I see my smoked almonds container. Looking closer, I see it has 28 ounces in a container about the size of a taller beer can. I can only imagine how small an ounce of almonds must be, what, 5 to 7, maybe 10, nuts? The container says that 1 ounce is about 1/4 cup, but I do not see that. That would mean the container has 7 cups in it, and that is not likely. I would guess it is very close to the 16 (wet) ounce container beside it, my water cup, in volume. Doh!
Does every engineering wannabe evaluate everything around them so critically? Then again, with conversions, I might still be wrong. All I am saying is... I do not think so.
Oh, right, still up. I thought I would be ready for bed, but I guess not. I probably made the grave mistake of turning off the a/c. I thought it was cool enough. Guess not. *turning the a/c back on*
Oh, I suppose I could drink more water to fill up so as to eat less. Then again, the last time I thought of that in the presence of a medical I was sternly chastised. Water, they said, *garble gobble bad burgle blog no something and such*, or so I was told. Hey, her heaving breasteses were staring right at me, I was like a deer in the headlights, but I did get the gist. And she probably noticed, indeed, I was happy to see here. Not the point. Still, it seems to cut my calorie intake. And until I can figure out a reasonable way to eat properly, it could not be the worst choice (that being McDonald, Burger King, etc.).
Do medicals understand that most people have no clue how to follow their plans, and even if we have a clue, we have no real means of following? Why not just suggest I learn to fly without assistance, then fly 5 to 10 miles (or would they then suggest knots?) per day? Telling me to lose weight is like telling a man on fire to put himself out. Yes, but the gasoline, doctor. Quit whining and extinguish. Hurry up, I have other patients waiting! *sigh* Oh, and while you are at extinquishing, could you juggle these bowling balls, balance this dagger on your nose, and swallow this sword? No, no side affects, and if there are any, you will be over them in no time flat. Uhrm, huh? I wonder if they are not already working for Quota Boy.
At least I have something real and serious to grumble about. At least until I go in again. Hmm, what to get me going next time? Women? No, I have beat that to death. Men? No, will not help, trust me. Oh, I will find something.
I cannot believe it though, I have taken my medicine every night. I have not missed one pill, even when I had to drag myself out of bed, and out of a mostly near sleep once or twice. They will not be able to say I did not give it a fair chance.
I know, I am becoming horribly long winded lately. I think it is because, in spite of the medicine, I am much more active out here. Even if my physical abilities have been weakened, that is the extent of it. I am able to think clearly for most of my waking hours. And, with little physical actionability, I am stuck with this, so you are stuck with this. And, I feel more sorry for you! I am enjoying doing as well as I am for the condition I am in. You must be bored to tears! Addictions, what can you say?
Well, a little more research while the cave cools, then make a check on available lodging for Mum and me, then a bit more bible reading before bedtime, and then maybe some sleep in an hour. Oh, I best take some Tylenol. It really helps, when it helps.
Good night, Aunty Belle.
.
I decided to begin research regarding diabetes. In particular, I looked for information regarding nutrition and meal planning. Now, I can probably get ideas there, but my meals will have to be customized in any event. Doing a simple check on nutritional needs for my age, weight, height, and such, if I remain pretty much comatose I need well over 3,300 calories, and some say as high as 4,100 calories, per day to stay even. Sure, I could stand to lose weight, but I think trimming more than 25% of those calories would be a maximum event. Even that might lead to an end to any proper eating practice. So 3 ounces of meat really will not do.
The problem is, I really have no capacity of food preparation to that level of sophistication. I do not live regularly, and up to this time, have not been able to do so. As such, meal planning might as well be walking on the moon. I will not be able to have 3 squares and snacks of my own accord. What I can do, though, is gather the types of foods recommended and see how they will fit with my life. It has to be custom anyway, might as well shift their design into my paradigm. Then again, there is cost. Even the sites I visited suggested the food choices may be quite expensive and books and recipe books add up, there are many of them (to include programs), and knowing which one will work best (for me especially) is as daunting as the process itself.
There are other complications. A suggestion was to eat an ounce of nuts as a superfood. Urhm, cool. You mean I need to measure out such items either each time I eat them or premeasure everything as soon as I get it? Again, complications that do not seem feasible. As I sit here writing, I see my smoked almonds container. Looking closer, I see it has 28 ounces in a container about the size of a taller beer can. I can only imagine how small an ounce of almonds must be, what, 5 to 7, maybe 10, nuts? The container says that 1 ounce is about 1/4 cup, but I do not see that. That would mean the container has 7 cups in it, and that is not likely. I would guess it is very close to the 16 (wet) ounce container beside it, my water cup, in volume. Doh!
Does every engineering wannabe evaluate everything around them so critically? Then again, with conversions, I might still be wrong. All I am saying is... I do not think so.
Oh, right, still up. I thought I would be ready for bed, but I guess not. I probably made the grave mistake of turning off the a/c. I thought it was cool enough. Guess not. *turning the a/c back on*
Oh, I suppose I could drink more water to fill up so as to eat less. Then again, the last time I thought of that in the presence of a medical I was sternly chastised. Water, they said, *garble gobble bad burgle blog no something and such*, or so I was told. Hey, her heaving breasteses were staring right at me, I was like a deer in the headlights, but I did get the gist. And she probably noticed, indeed, I was happy to see here. Not the point. Still, it seems to cut my calorie intake. And until I can figure out a reasonable way to eat properly, it could not be the worst choice (that being McDonald, Burger King, etc.).
Do medicals understand that most people have no clue how to follow their plans, and even if we have a clue, we have no real means of following? Why not just suggest I learn to fly without assistance, then fly 5 to 10 miles (or would they then suggest knots?) per day? Telling me to lose weight is like telling a man on fire to put himself out. Yes, but the gasoline, doctor. Quit whining and extinguish. Hurry up, I have other patients waiting! *sigh* Oh, and while you are at extinquishing, could you juggle these bowling balls, balance this dagger on your nose, and swallow this sword? No, no side affects, and if there are any, you will be over them in no time flat. Uhrm, huh? I wonder if they are not already working for Quota Boy.
At least I have something real and serious to grumble about. At least until I go in again. Hmm, what to get me going next time? Women? No, I have beat that to death. Men? No, will not help, trust me. Oh, I will find something.
I cannot believe it though, I have taken my medicine every night. I have not missed one pill, even when I had to drag myself out of bed, and out of a mostly near sleep once or twice. They will not be able to say I did not give it a fair chance.
I know, I am becoming horribly long winded lately. I think it is because, in spite of the medicine, I am much more active out here. Even if my physical abilities have been weakened, that is the extent of it. I am able to think clearly for most of my waking hours. And, with little physical actionability, I am stuck with this, so you are stuck with this. And, I feel more sorry for you! I am enjoying doing as well as I am for the condition I am in. You must be bored to tears! Addictions, what can you say?
Well, a little more research while the cave cools, then make a check on available lodging for Mum and me, then a bit more bible reading before bedtime, and then maybe some sleep in an hour. Oh, I best take some Tylenol. It really helps, when it helps.
Good night, Aunty Belle.
Friday, August 28, 2009
A decent afternoon.
.
.
I called the range where I am set to shoot tomorrow to seek information and perhaps rearrange my shooting time. I connected to an answering machine and so left a message, explaining what I wanted to know and leaving my phone number. As I was driving home, I received a call back, but my phone being in my pocket and the road being a very curvy mountain road, I could not answer. Getting home, I checked the message. I do not think the man listened to my call at all. He simply indicated I needed 50 rounds and would be shooting off hand, sitting, and prone. Doh! I will call in the morning or go in anyway.
I did go out shooting today. When I moved the target closer, practiced a few rounds, then shot for real completely off hand (at about half of the distance), I obliterated the middle of the bullseye. There were no outliers, nothing outside of the bullseye, and I had perhaps a 3/4" spread maximum. I moved the target back out to 50" and tried again. My shots looked like I had used a shotgun, with about a 6" x 4" spread. *sigh* I can hit pop bottle lids at that distance, but not a bullseye of 3 to 4 times that size, for Pete's sake! Ghrrrrrrrr!
Well, I did what I could. Then I went to pistol. What do you want me to hit with it at under 30 yards? I can you know. I can shoot most things I can see out to 50 yards when I adjust for the distance and practice a few shots with it too. Heck, even with the .45, I can go out a smidge further without too much trouble (probably easily out to 80 yards with the .22 pistol). But with a .22 rifle, on a target, at 50 feet, shotgun shooting. What gives? I swear, I or the rifle am cursed.
But it was fun. And it was a cool day, at least when we finally made it out to the range. The drive is good, being outside is nice, having some company is really good. Of course, the work of shooting is so hard and business like as to almost ruin the day. (Okay, of the last few sentences in the paragraph, can you tell which one is not true, you have 30 seconds and 4 guesses.)
Toward the end of it though, I was starting to get neck strain and a headache. So what would have been a pleasant drive back to town ended up being a bit uncomfortable. I think from now on I will carry a packet of Tylenol wherever I go. I took some when I arrived home and it is already working to a degree, an half hour later. With the right medicine, re-hydration techniques, and in healing, my body does very well. Feed it the wrong stuff, though, and... usually it does not matter. It was built well, if it rejects some things outright, some medicine and such.
I did receive a call back from the V.A. regarding the new medicines and such. It seems my glucose is 2 to 3 times higher than they want it, 8 is high, mine was 13.6 or something, and they want it around 5 or 6. My glucose reading is at 260 or so. They must not read my chart, my glucose has been as high as over 650. But they did indicate protein is in my urine and so are fat cells (or something like that). Whatever, as I said, one thing at a time. Did I mention that my vision improved? Anyway... I told her about the side effects and she said she had never heard of anyone having such side effects. They really do not believe me. And, until D.C. said these were common side effects and I looked it up online (trust but verify :p ), I was starting to think maybe they were right and it was just me. Nope. I will print the sheet of side effects out for my next visit. And, I will ask for extra strength Tylenol (otherwise I have to buy standard and split them in odd ways and hope to get it right) if I decide to stick with any medicines. I told her, in no uncertain terms, that I would not start any new medicines until this issue was managed, period.
She suggested I change my diet. And I told her I have no idea what to eat, since they have said not to eat: fats, salt, sugar, diet stuff, fat free stuff, starches, carbohydrates, too much protein, and some other stuff. She suggested they have a dietary class and that she would enroll me. Fine, but I will not be eating broccoli and spinach, with a side of black pepper. If the food options are not practical for what I am able to cook here, there is not a lot I can do. Same goes for expense, often what I have seen suggested costs a king's ransom. As well, if it tastes like cardboard, there is no way I could stick to it. And do not even think about suggesting I eat 3 ounces of meat at a time. Who are these people? Definitely not right in the head, they cannot be sometimes. We will see though.
I suggested that I would not take more medicines, as I said, until I was sure I would be continuing on this medicine. If it has had little affect or if it has but they refuse to treat the side effects, this is going away. I will not start Metfornin, as that was useless in my diabetes treatment. And I have no way of changing my diet with a kitchen countertop that is completely used up by a microwave and the only functional pan (or pot for that matter) I have is a cast iron skillet, I have no room for a steamer, regular pot, let alone a stock pot. Nor do I have the functionality to procure fresh produce, prepare it, then cook it. I would simply be using what of my life on these medicines I have buying, preparing, and cooking food, then back to bed. She indicated that if I do not control my health, it will control me. Already there, babe (though I did not say that), they would have probably hauled me in for sex therapy or something!).
Gee whiz guys, get a clue. If taking these medicines were cost free to me, and since they literally cost me no money, why in the world would I not be taking them. I simply cannot trust their dire warning anymore, after being told 10 years ago that I was in imminent danger of a heart attack or stroke... Ten years ago if I did not say that already. And, being told, take these there will be no side affects or you will work your way out of any of them while failing a year of school because of them. No, trust is earned not given. I gave them a chance and they have failed miserably. Either they do not know what they are talking about or they are lying. There simply is no choice.
Bah! I do need to stop with the sugary stuff, no doubt. But I will just eat what I have always eaten, well, minus fast foods and sweet soda. And, I will enjoy my life until I croak. Ribbit. Ha! I crack me up. There is no irritated, either be irritated or do not be irritated. Is that not what Yoda said? Still, I must chuckle. I am quite sure they must wonder why I am not dead yet. I could tell them, but I do not think they could understand. God said No. Really. My tasks are not yet done.
Well, I should read a bit more in the bible. I really have been enjoying that, if some of it is as tasty as shoe leather and only twice as thick. I am sure, though, that it is going in there somewhere and making a good brain gravy. And it does have an affect on my life, how I lead it, choices I make, advice I offer, and even getting me off my bum and into action from time to time. Pickle juice, more water, a bit of reading, and *Bamb* ... my head hitting the pillow as I get K.O.'ed in the pillow fight with sleep.
Good night, probably until 2:00 or so. But that has been working fairly well. Sleep well, and only let the cute bedbugs bite!
.
I called the range where I am set to shoot tomorrow to seek information and perhaps rearrange my shooting time. I connected to an answering machine and so left a message, explaining what I wanted to know and leaving my phone number. As I was driving home, I received a call back, but my phone being in my pocket and the road being a very curvy mountain road, I could not answer. Getting home, I checked the message. I do not think the man listened to my call at all. He simply indicated I needed 50 rounds and would be shooting off hand, sitting, and prone. Doh! I will call in the morning or go in anyway.
I did go out shooting today. When I moved the target closer, practiced a few rounds, then shot for real completely off hand (at about half of the distance), I obliterated the middle of the bullseye. There were no outliers, nothing outside of the bullseye, and I had perhaps a 3/4" spread maximum. I moved the target back out to 50" and tried again. My shots looked like I had used a shotgun, with about a 6" x 4" spread. *sigh* I can hit pop bottle lids at that distance, but not a bullseye of 3 to 4 times that size, for Pete's sake! Ghrrrrrrrr!
Well, I did what I could. Then I went to pistol. What do you want me to hit with it at under 30 yards? I can you know. I can shoot most things I can see out to 50 yards when I adjust for the distance and practice a few shots with it too. Heck, even with the .45, I can go out a smidge further without too much trouble (probably easily out to 80 yards with the .22 pistol). But with a .22 rifle, on a target, at 50 feet, shotgun shooting. What gives? I swear, I or the rifle am cursed.
But it was fun. And it was a cool day, at least when we finally made it out to the range. The drive is good, being outside is nice, having some company is really good. Of course, the work of shooting is so hard and business like as to almost ruin the day. (Okay, of the last few sentences in the paragraph, can you tell which one is not true, you have 30 seconds and 4 guesses.)
Toward the end of it though, I was starting to get neck strain and a headache. So what would have been a pleasant drive back to town ended up being a bit uncomfortable. I think from now on I will carry a packet of Tylenol wherever I go. I took some when I arrived home and it is already working to a degree, an half hour later. With the right medicine, re-hydration techniques, and in healing, my body does very well. Feed it the wrong stuff, though, and... usually it does not matter. It was built well, if it rejects some things outright, some medicine and such.
I did receive a call back from the V.A. regarding the new medicines and such. It seems my glucose is 2 to 3 times higher than they want it, 8 is high, mine was 13.6 or something, and they want it around 5 or 6. My glucose reading is at 260 or so. They must not read my chart, my glucose has been as high as over 650. But they did indicate protein is in my urine and so are fat cells (or something like that). Whatever, as I said, one thing at a time. Did I mention that my vision improved? Anyway... I told her about the side effects and she said she had never heard of anyone having such side effects. They really do not believe me. And, until D.C. said these were common side effects and I looked it up online (trust but verify :p ), I was starting to think maybe they were right and it was just me. Nope. I will print the sheet of side effects out for my next visit. And, I will ask for extra strength Tylenol (otherwise I have to buy standard and split them in odd ways and hope to get it right) if I decide to stick with any medicines. I told her, in no uncertain terms, that I would not start any new medicines until this issue was managed, period.
She suggested I change my diet. And I told her I have no idea what to eat, since they have said not to eat: fats, salt, sugar, diet stuff, fat free stuff, starches, carbohydrates, too much protein, and some other stuff. She suggested they have a dietary class and that she would enroll me. Fine, but I will not be eating broccoli and spinach, with a side of black pepper. If the food options are not practical for what I am able to cook here, there is not a lot I can do. Same goes for expense, often what I have seen suggested costs a king's ransom. As well, if it tastes like cardboard, there is no way I could stick to it. And do not even think about suggesting I eat 3 ounces of meat at a time. Who are these people? Definitely not right in the head, they cannot be sometimes. We will see though.
I suggested that I would not take more medicines, as I said, until I was sure I would be continuing on this medicine. If it has had little affect or if it has but they refuse to treat the side effects, this is going away. I will not start Metfornin, as that was useless in my diabetes treatment. And I have no way of changing my diet with a kitchen countertop that is completely used up by a microwave and the only functional pan (or pot for that matter) I have is a cast iron skillet, I have no room for a steamer, regular pot, let alone a stock pot. Nor do I have the functionality to procure fresh produce, prepare it, then cook it. I would simply be using what of my life on these medicines I have buying, preparing, and cooking food, then back to bed. She indicated that if I do not control my health, it will control me. Already there, babe (though I did not say that), they would have probably hauled me in for sex therapy or something!).
Gee whiz guys, get a clue. If taking these medicines were cost free to me, and since they literally cost me no money, why in the world would I not be taking them. I simply cannot trust their dire warning anymore, after being told 10 years ago that I was in imminent danger of a heart attack or stroke... Ten years ago if I did not say that already. And, being told, take these there will be no side affects or you will work your way out of any of them while failing a year of school because of them. No, trust is earned not given. I gave them a chance and they have failed miserably. Either they do not know what they are talking about or they are lying. There simply is no choice.
Bah! I do need to stop with the sugary stuff, no doubt. But I will just eat what I have always eaten, well, minus fast foods and sweet soda. And, I will enjoy my life until I croak. Ribbit. Ha! I crack me up. There is no irritated, either be irritated or do not be irritated. Is that not what Yoda said? Still, I must chuckle. I am quite sure they must wonder why I am not dead yet. I could tell them, but I do not think they could understand. God said No. Really. My tasks are not yet done.
Well, I should read a bit more in the bible. I really have been enjoying that, if some of it is as tasty as shoe leather and only twice as thick. I am sure, though, that it is going in there somewhere and making a good brain gravy. And it does have an affect on my life, how I lead it, choices I make, advice I offer, and even getting me off my bum and into action from time to time. Pickle juice, more water, a bit of reading, and *Bamb* ... my head hitting the pillow as I get K.O.'ed in the pillow fight with sleep.
Good night, probably until 2:00 or so. But that has been working fairly well. Sleep well, and only let the cute bedbugs bite!
I am not sure how that worked.
.
.
But it did work, and so did I. Only a few things, perhaps, but with a slightly less cluttered apartment, a few things set up to go later, and a feeling of ease at having accomplished somethings, sleep will be good for the few hours I can enjoy it. And then, maybe, a really good afternoon. No, actually, I did a lot of things. I took care of some involved tasks and saw them through to completion, unlike how much of life is going for me lately. So many tasks require this, then waiting, then that, then more waiting, and on and on. Not these, done, finished, completed.
Good night, sort of, again.
.
But it did work, and so did I. Only a few things, perhaps, but with a slightly less cluttered apartment, a few things set up to go later, and a feeling of ease at having accomplished somethings, sleep will be good for the few hours I can enjoy it. And then, maybe, a really good afternoon. No, actually, I did a lot of things. I took care of some involved tasks and saw them through to completion, unlike how much of life is going for me lately. So many tasks require this, then waiting, then that, then more waiting, and on and on. Not these, done, finished, completed.
Good night, sort of, again.
A new deal of the good kind.
.
.
Before I laid myself out to sleep, I read from the bible a bit more. Paul wrote a lot of letters. Well, not that many really, but you know what I mean if you get into the middle of them without realizing (or remembering) that a goodly chunk of the New Testament is letters from him to various churches and people, and letters from others in a similar fashion. I am not sure where I am, though I am several books past where I was before. I think I am two books before Titus.
After reading a goodly bit, sometimes I can read more, sometimes less. But this morning I read a good many pages. Anyway, after reading, I started my nightly prayer. I usually thank God, for many and varied things, people, and whatever else one can give thanks, and of course simply for God being God, the whole creation thing, and all. Then I go through a review of my life before Him, offering my unsurety, my doubts, and some of my trials and tribulations, and then I ask for blessings for people I know and love, for those I despise, for the sick, hungry, and meek, and for the world in general. Next, I ask Him to open me up to His will and ways, to fill me with the Holy Spirit, to nourish Chris within, and I remain quiet (mentally) while I keep open to this for some (sometimes longer, sometimes shorter) periods of time. My prayers, by the way, have become mostly silent, only saying something out loud at the beginning and saying the "Amen" and Trinity while I cross myself at the end.
On this day, while I was doing that last, my mind flashed to what I could do, I realized that it is cool and would be a good time to work, and so I was 'given' a list of simple things which would help me out right now. So, after completing my prayer, with an extra thanks for the energy and direction, I got up instead of trying to sleep and started working. A few more tasks and I will be done for this morning and will try to sleep again, to be up by early afternoon. Odd, but ask and you shall receive, if too you must work. Work, too, is prayer if you can bring your mind around to it. So, whistle while you work. I do believe it is pleasing to the Lord. Hmm, I cannot carry a tune, or do not know any whistle tunes, so I might just hum instead. Hmm, get it. Ha!
Well, back to it.
Good day.
.
Before I laid myself out to sleep, I read from the bible a bit more. Paul wrote a lot of letters. Well, not that many really, but you know what I mean if you get into the middle of them without realizing (or remembering) that a goodly chunk of the New Testament is letters from him to various churches and people, and letters from others in a similar fashion. I am not sure where I am, though I am several books past where I was before. I think I am two books before Titus.
After reading a goodly bit, sometimes I can read more, sometimes less. But this morning I read a good many pages. Anyway, after reading, I started my nightly prayer. I usually thank God, for many and varied things, people, and whatever else one can give thanks, and of course simply for God being God, the whole creation thing, and all. Then I go through a review of my life before Him, offering my unsurety, my doubts, and some of my trials and tribulations, and then I ask for blessings for people I know and love, for those I despise, for the sick, hungry, and meek, and for the world in general. Next, I ask Him to open me up to His will and ways, to fill me with the Holy Spirit, to nourish Chris within, and I remain quiet (mentally) while I keep open to this for some (sometimes longer, sometimes shorter) periods of time. My prayers, by the way, have become mostly silent, only saying something out loud at the beginning and saying the "Amen" and Trinity while I cross myself at the end.
On this day, while I was doing that last, my mind flashed to what I could do, I realized that it is cool and would be a good time to work, and so I was 'given' a list of simple things which would help me out right now. So, after completing my prayer, with an extra thanks for the energy and direction, I got up instead of trying to sleep and started working. A few more tasks and I will be done for this morning and will try to sleep again, to be up by early afternoon. Odd, but ask and you shall receive, if too you must work. Work, too, is prayer if you can bring your mind around to it. So, whistle while you work. I do believe it is pleasing to the Lord. Hmm, I cannot carry a tune, or do not know any whistle tunes, so I might just hum instead. Hmm, get it. Ha!
Well, back to it.
Good day.
Another 2:00 pseudo morning.
.
.
This is just odd. I suppose, remembering back to when I just arrived, I was having the same difficulty, that of only being able to sleep a few hours at a time. I have been able to get back to sleep in a few hours, which is good and better than my initial troubles when they started after starting medicine. I think though tonight I was able to see what the problem was. I am awake enough. What woke me up was fever. I am radiating like a cast iron stove with a good fire going in the belly of it. No shirt, a/c, and a fan are helping me to cool off. Drinking water helps a bit. And I will take some more Tylenol as it did help with the aches and pains I had going to bed.
I have been viewing news items through various blogs. Though things seem a bit more up then down, the ride has just begun. I pretty much ignore politics now that it has proven defunct. I expect nothing good from there, and get nothing good. States, though, seem to be stepping up to the plate, along with citizens. That has some potential as this federal government (sic) has no patience or interest in mere citizens. All of that is a side issue, to a degree, considering what is about to happen financially. I really hope all those who voted for Quota Boy enjoy their just deserts. And not much more can be said for those who supported and voted for McCain. Both of them were on the same page, regarding bailouts and "stimulus". Neither was particularly anti-abortion. Neither was in agreement about gun rights. Twins, really, for all political intents and purposes. The right and left of dumb and dumber I should think.
I am not sure, exactly, how things will end up. As a nation, we could ride this out, eventually. We would be a more humble and poorer nation. Or, in desperation, the rats caught in the maze could turn to socialist or communist totalitarianism. Their are certainly signs and portents that this federal government (sic) is doing, or trying to do, just that. They have, to a degree, run out of gas. Even their own are howling about the stupidity of it, blue dogs being beaten up by their electorate in a loud and angry way, rinos being dumped by their own, and Republicans looking for a way to hide from their responsibilities having masters from too many houses, none of which are in agreement. What works for corporate or even small business does not work for the average (working, worthwhile, tax PAYING, law abiding) citizen.
But, that is not for me. As I have not voted and will not vote (maybe locally) again until I see real progress and a realignment of the Republican (or other potential party). None of them see to quite grasp that, if they are not solid in conservative country, they simply will not be elected. I think, along with millions of others, we have been abandoned by our party. The platforms are technically in place but they are as ignored as so many campaign slogans, rather than as a base from which to work and diligently. I do think, finally, the federal government (sic) has become afraid. To that end, they are trying to ostracize those of us who: are veterans; own guns; disagree with them (on anything); believe in state and personal rights; and who are the only ones standing in the way. To be honest, there are few of us. And many will shy away if violence is enacted by this government to their ends. Then again, how many did George Washington actually have stand with him? Damned few, I tell you. For shame!
Still, with politics, financial worries, and health issues, it is a good day. There is just more on the plate to contend with. And, within reason, I am doing better than my average. I am waiting for the weather related heat to dissipate a bit, then I will get on with life. It is, actually, a good time to be tinkering with medicine and giving it a chance. I can do little else, though I would like to be doing a lot more. I really need to get some things done and I really need to control my finances a bit better. All of those things are hampered in part by the weather but more so by the medicine. As much as I hate the medicine, I am hoping it has done it's job. If not, into the circular file, again, it will go. And then I will need to depend on what I can scrape from life to lose weight, get out hiking and camping, go hunting, and begin fishing in earnest. I will have to hope those things will tend my sorry butt (and ears, eyes, legs, high blood pressure, warts, and such).
My main issues, this month, are registering my vehicle in Utah, making sure AAA is paid, change my drivers license to Utah, supply lodging for the family reunion, get my fingerprint card and get that going, get plane tickets for my lady friend, get out of the current apartment contract, and... Well, there are other things, but those are some of the main gadflies buzzing around in my bone bonnet. I suppose I should see about taking the unused air conditioner back too. It might help, with these fevers, but as I said, it only cools a bit more than what the other machine offers, so it is not worth a few degrees while I have such a tight budget. So much for saving, at least for now.
Yep, life is pretty good if annoying. I am doing what I can. I am thoroughly enjoying reading the bible. And, having started cooking once in a while has really helped morale. I hope I am leading the right kind of life, one which might even make another consider finding the inner peace and faith I have found. As I said, I do not mind if they merely return to the roots of their faith or whether they find mine suitable. I do believe mine is more correct, as do all others, but I do abide by what I recently read. There were several passages indicating that it starts with Christ and from there, some basis may be found. Even Peter made a strong statement regarding this.
I will tinker, then attempt sleep again. At least, tonight, I am awake enough to write, think, tinker, and then read a bit before going back to bed. I hate waking up so tired I cannot think and yet be unable to sleep. Yuckamundo. As I said, thankfully this is not one of those nights.
Good night, MK.
.
This is just odd. I suppose, remembering back to when I just arrived, I was having the same difficulty, that of only being able to sleep a few hours at a time. I have been able to get back to sleep in a few hours, which is good and better than my initial troubles when they started after starting medicine. I think though tonight I was able to see what the problem was. I am awake enough. What woke me up was fever. I am radiating like a cast iron stove with a good fire going in the belly of it. No shirt, a/c, and a fan are helping me to cool off. Drinking water helps a bit. And I will take some more Tylenol as it did help with the aches and pains I had going to bed.
I have been viewing news items through various blogs. Though things seem a bit more up then down, the ride has just begun. I pretty much ignore politics now that it has proven defunct. I expect nothing good from there, and get nothing good. States, though, seem to be stepping up to the plate, along with citizens. That has some potential as this federal government (sic) has no patience or interest in mere citizens. All of that is a side issue, to a degree, considering what is about to happen financially. I really hope all those who voted for Quota Boy enjoy their just deserts. And not much more can be said for those who supported and voted for McCain. Both of them were on the same page, regarding bailouts and "stimulus". Neither was particularly anti-abortion. Neither was in agreement about gun rights. Twins, really, for all political intents and purposes. The right and left of dumb and dumber I should think.
I am not sure, exactly, how things will end up. As a nation, we could ride this out, eventually. We would be a more humble and poorer nation. Or, in desperation, the rats caught in the maze could turn to socialist or communist totalitarianism. Their are certainly signs and portents that this federal government (sic) is doing, or trying to do, just that. They have, to a degree, run out of gas. Even their own are howling about the stupidity of it, blue dogs being beaten up by their electorate in a loud and angry way, rinos being dumped by their own, and Republicans looking for a way to hide from their responsibilities having masters from too many houses, none of which are in agreement. What works for corporate or even small business does not work for the average (working, worthwhile, tax PAYING, law abiding) citizen.
But, that is not for me. As I have not voted and will not vote (maybe locally) again until I see real progress and a realignment of the Republican (or other potential party). None of them see to quite grasp that, if they are not solid in conservative country, they simply will not be elected. I think, along with millions of others, we have been abandoned by our party. The platforms are technically in place but they are as ignored as so many campaign slogans, rather than as a base from which to work and diligently. I do think, finally, the federal government (sic) has become afraid. To that end, they are trying to ostracize those of us who: are veterans; own guns; disagree with them (on anything); believe in state and personal rights; and who are the only ones standing in the way. To be honest, there are few of us. And many will shy away if violence is enacted by this government to their ends. Then again, how many did George Washington actually have stand with him? Damned few, I tell you. For shame!
Still, with politics, financial worries, and health issues, it is a good day. There is just more on the plate to contend with. And, within reason, I am doing better than my average. I am waiting for the weather related heat to dissipate a bit, then I will get on with life. It is, actually, a good time to be tinkering with medicine and giving it a chance. I can do little else, though I would like to be doing a lot more. I really need to get some things done and I really need to control my finances a bit better. All of those things are hampered in part by the weather but more so by the medicine. As much as I hate the medicine, I am hoping it has done it's job. If not, into the circular file, again, it will go. And then I will need to depend on what I can scrape from life to lose weight, get out hiking and camping, go hunting, and begin fishing in earnest. I will have to hope those things will tend my sorry butt (and ears, eyes, legs, high blood pressure, warts, and such).
My main issues, this month, are registering my vehicle in Utah, making sure AAA is paid, change my drivers license to Utah, supply lodging for the family reunion, get my fingerprint card and get that going, get plane tickets for my lady friend, get out of the current apartment contract, and... Well, there are other things, but those are some of the main gadflies buzzing around in my bone bonnet. I suppose I should see about taking the unused air conditioner back too. It might help, with these fevers, but as I said, it only cools a bit more than what the other machine offers, so it is not worth a few degrees while I have such a tight budget. So much for saving, at least for now.
Yep, life is pretty good if annoying. I am doing what I can. I am thoroughly enjoying reading the bible. And, having started cooking once in a while has really helped morale. I hope I am leading the right kind of life, one which might even make another consider finding the inner peace and faith I have found. As I said, I do not mind if they merely return to the roots of their faith or whether they find mine suitable. I do believe mine is more correct, as do all others, but I do abide by what I recently read. There were several passages indicating that it starts with Christ and from there, some basis may be found. Even Peter made a strong statement regarding this.
I will tinker, then attempt sleep again. At least, tonight, I am awake enough to write, think, tinker, and then read a bit before going back to bed. I hate waking up so tired I cannot think and yet be unable to sleep. Yuckamundo. As I said, thankfully this is not one of those nights.
Good night, MK.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Headaches and travel, plus little luck.
.
.
I tried to post my apartment at two online sites. On one I could not find a way to post the place, the other site would not let me post despite everything being correct. I think the latter site did not like me not having a local phone number, but did not implicitly indicate that. I will speak with the manager tomorrow and see if she will field calls, or at least redirect them. What a pain.
After that my neighbor wanted to drive to Ogden. Prices for reloading expendables are far cheaper there. For 500 .38 caliber bullets, he paid $21 and change, here it was $45, for example. As well, there is the bit about getting out of the apartment and Logan for a bit. I picked up more .22 ammunition, the kind I like. On the way home we stopped at a decent place to eat, though I cannot remember the name of the place. Maddox, actually, now that I think about it. In spite of a packed parking lot it only took a five minute wait to be seated. My stomach voted for the 1 pound ribeye but my wallet vetoed that and I ended up with fried chicken. I will have to go back some time, though. I am curious, plus, they raise their own beef (and bison if you are into that). As I have said in a comment response, beef is expensive here. Weird for a beef raising community. Maybe it is because beef is considered a luxury here, or because it is not as valued as a meal (with low demand quite often one finds higher prices). Then again, I have only been here a month, prices might flex like they do in Iowa, and a lot.
I have been tired since I woke up and it has not improved. No matter how much or how little I do, I am tired. I was able to break out of that before, but on these medicines I do not think that will be possible. I had thought more water might help, but so far, in the short run, it has had no affect at all. And, without the water pill, I bet I am becoming water logged on this medicine. Tylenol helps with the neck strain and headache only about half or less of the time now. I am not sure what to do, other than to quit all medicine again when the time is ripe. I must have a more severe reaction to this stuff as no one could possibly work like this, not well for sure. Simply getting up for work and being on time would not be possible on a regular schedule if most had my level of reaction.
I tried to take some pictures again today. But it seems my camera is well and truly broken. I will have to wait until I can afford a new camera (probably a used film 35mm Nikon, an F100, F5, or maybe even an F6, body and a standard lens to start things off). But that will be a $500 to $600 proposition, so it goes on the list with everything else on the long list, if it does have some priority. It might even come before a hunting rifle and scope. Who knows. Now I have a bunch of small Frisbees, what had been it's 'film', that I just received. Though those can be used for data. Well, actually, I almost never record to CDs or DVDs, so, yes, Frisbees.
I had commented on one of Jean's posts about my place in life, and regarding having little left to spend. She had commented along the lines of my comment being true, depending on whether I was happy with my place and lot in life at this point in time in my life. Well, that is difficult. I guess my deal is that I threw my life away and it was handed back, several times in several ways. So, everything in life has been, in a way, gravy since then. Simply put, most people do not get the chance to live beyond a dozen things I have survived.
And, though I am not where I wanted to be when I was young, I have no career, no knowledge with which to obtain one, no health to hope for one beyond a minor miracle, and my health is in the tank, that my heart is still beating, that I am in a relatively decent financial situation considering, and that I have come to bow before Christ and to be attempting to live a Christian life, that has great merit. Sometimes I still wonder if death would not have been better, but no, no it would not have been. And as for the dreams of my youth, I could not have fulfilled them all as I have come to know. As I have learned, to be a honest Christian, a semi-educated man, and to have friends and family, in the end, is enough. Anything I might or might not attain after that is only richer gravy than the extra living gravy grace I have already been shown.
I am grateful to have been given a chance to see more of life and to have come to enjoy life, even in my wretched states of existence at times. So, that is the answer to that, for me. It is as well stated as I am able. Sure, I would love to be doing research and development in some engineering field, or to be a outdoor living, hunting, and survival guru, or to be a master craftsman producing top notch firearms for large dollars. Not all get there. As a fact, few to the point of statistical insignificance get there both because of the difficulty of the tracks as well as the lack of need for such people. But I am here, humble as I may be, still interested in life, and still with a pocket full of small hopes and dreams. And, I am saved to my knowledge. Maybe it is not glorious, spectacular, wealthy, or famous, it is good, and not just good enough.
Ackh! Tylenol and sleep.
Good night.
.
I tried to post my apartment at two online sites. On one I could not find a way to post the place, the other site would not let me post despite everything being correct. I think the latter site did not like me not having a local phone number, but did not implicitly indicate that. I will speak with the manager tomorrow and see if she will field calls, or at least redirect them. What a pain.
After that my neighbor wanted to drive to Ogden. Prices for reloading expendables are far cheaper there. For 500 .38 caliber bullets, he paid $21 and change, here it was $45, for example. As well, there is the bit about getting out of the apartment and Logan for a bit. I picked up more .22 ammunition, the kind I like. On the way home we stopped at a decent place to eat, though I cannot remember the name of the place. Maddox, actually, now that I think about it. In spite of a packed parking lot it only took a five minute wait to be seated. My stomach voted for the 1 pound ribeye but my wallet vetoed that and I ended up with fried chicken. I will have to go back some time, though. I am curious, plus, they raise their own beef (and bison if you are into that). As I have said in a comment response, beef is expensive here. Weird for a beef raising community. Maybe it is because beef is considered a luxury here, or because it is not as valued as a meal (with low demand quite often one finds higher prices). Then again, I have only been here a month, prices might flex like they do in Iowa, and a lot.
I have been tired since I woke up and it has not improved. No matter how much or how little I do, I am tired. I was able to break out of that before, but on these medicines I do not think that will be possible. I had thought more water might help, but so far, in the short run, it has had no affect at all. And, without the water pill, I bet I am becoming water logged on this medicine. Tylenol helps with the neck strain and headache only about half or less of the time now. I am not sure what to do, other than to quit all medicine again when the time is ripe. I must have a more severe reaction to this stuff as no one could possibly work like this, not well for sure. Simply getting up for work and being on time would not be possible on a regular schedule if most had my level of reaction.
I tried to take some pictures again today. But it seems my camera is well and truly broken. I will have to wait until I can afford a new camera (probably a used film 35mm Nikon, an F100, F5, or maybe even an F6, body and a standard lens to start things off). But that will be a $500 to $600 proposition, so it goes on the list with everything else on the long list, if it does have some priority. It might even come before a hunting rifle and scope. Who knows. Now I have a bunch of small Frisbees, what had been it's 'film', that I just received. Though those can be used for data. Well, actually, I almost never record to CDs or DVDs, so, yes, Frisbees.
I had commented on one of Jean's posts about my place in life, and regarding having little left to spend. She had commented along the lines of my comment being true, depending on whether I was happy with my place and lot in life at this point in time in my life. Well, that is difficult. I guess my deal is that I threw my life away and it was handed back, several times in several ways. So, everything in life has been, in a way, gravy since then. Simply put, most people do not get the chance to live beyond a dozen things I have survived.
And, though I am not where I wanted to be when I was young, I have no career, no knowledge with which to obtain one, no health to hope for one beyond a minor miracle, and my health is in the tank, that my heart is still beating, that I am in a relatively decent financial situation considering, and that I have come to bow before Christ and to be attempting to live a Christian life, that has great merit. Sometimes I still wonder if death would not have been better, but no, no it would not have been. And as for the dreams of my youth, I could not have fulfilled them all as I have come to know. As I have learned, to be a honest Christian, a semi-educated man, and to have friends and family, in the end, is enough. Anything I might or might not attain after that is only richer gravy than the extra living gravy grace I have already been shown.
I am grateful to have been given a chance to see more of life and to have come to enjoy life, even in my wretched states of existence at times. So, that is the answer to that, for me. It is as well stated as I am able. Sure, I would love to be doing research and development in some engineering field, or to be a outdoor living, hunting, and survival guru, or to be a master craftsman producing top notch firearms for large dollars. Not all get there. As a fact, few to the point of statistical insignificance get there both because of the difficulty of the tracks as well as the lack of need for such people. But I am here, humble as I may be, still interested in life, and still with a pocket full of small hopes and dreams. And, I am saved to my knowledge. Maybe it is not glorious, spectacular, wealthy, or famous, it is good, and not just good enough.
Ackh! Tylenol and sleep.
Good night.
Awake at 2:00.
.
.
I seem to have copied yesterday and woke at the same time. I could not get back to sleep and yet I was not awake enough to do be productive in any manner, so I tinkered. That is not helping me get back to sleep so I believe I will read a bit. There are many things to do in the days and weeks ahead and I am nervous about several of them. While money will remain a bit tight, I have a lot of spending to do. I am not sure how I will get it done, but I think I can do it. The double rent potential is hanging over my head like an axe, as well. Nothing like money worries to keep one from sleeping soundly. I suppose I can only do what I can do, I will leave this in God's hands.
If I am able to sleep well enough shortly, I should be able to take care of some of those worries tomorrow. Others will just have to tend to themselves, after I have done my part. Once I have done my part though, it seems a great deal of stress is lifted if it is replaced by a longer term lower level stress. I have come to believe that most things in life are like that. The healthy juggle those with seeming impunity, though too after a long week it is easy to see the strain on even a healthy face. Time takes a toll in this way. I almost wonder if aging is more of an accumulation of these stresses than of anything time does, to some extent. Though too, I think God capped us at 120 years, give or take. And, yeah, I do believe He did.
Just checking in. Now I am checking out. My eyes should be able to handle reading now, and perhaps that will help me sleep.
Good night, I hope.
.
I seem to have copied yesterday and woke at the same time. I could not get back to sleep and yet I was not awake enough to do be productive in any manner, so I tinkered. That is not helping me get back to sleep so I believe I will read a bit. There are many things to do in the days and weeks ahead and I am nervous about several of them. While money will remain a bit tight, I have a lot of spending to do. I am not sure how I will get it done, but I think I can do it. The double rent potential is hanging over my head like an axe, as well. Nothing like money worries to keep one from sleeping soundly. I suppose I can only do what I can do, I will leave this in God's hands.
If I am able to sleep well enough shortly, I should be able to take care of some of those worries tomorrow. Others will just have to tend to themselves, after I have done my part. Once I have done my part though, it seems a great deal of stress is lifted if it is replaced by a longer term lower level stress. I have come to believe that most things in life are like that. The healthy juggle those with seeming impunity, though too after a long week it is easy to see the strain on even a healthy face. Time takes a toll in this way. I almost wonder if aging is more of an accumulation of these stresses than of anything time does, to some extent. Though too, I think God capped us at 120 years, give or take. And, yeah, I do believe He did.
Just checking in. Now I am checking out. My eyes should be able to handle reading now, and perhaps that will help me sleep.
Good night, I hope.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Nicely played, considering.
.
.
Today has been a roundly satisfying success. To be sure, I could have done more. Also to be sure, I could have failed on many accounts. I have finished most of my list from the start of the week and completed several other things, if all minor. I was able to travel, track ongoing works, be on time, and take care of all the little details I had hoped at least within what I was doing. I cannot say I am back on track but that I was able to successfully negotiate the day has been good for my sorely put upon confidence.
My Mom called and it seems she will be going to the upcoming family reunion for our family of friends. So, I will need to see about lodging. Since half of the reason for going was to see her, this will be great. The food will be fantastic, you must trust me. But to see people from my childhood, some of them who still linger in direct memory and some who may return to memory when met, should be a fine exploration of my youth and, more importantly, the rest of their stories. There is one in particular, a kindly woman who I remember as the quiet person while sometimes the world stormed around my little life. It will be very good to see her. She stands out as a saint in my mind, and I think she is one. Especially if she does not know it, more so probably.
I have some reason to believe that someone in the V.A. reads my blog. No, I am not paranoid about it. I think it is good for them to see what some of us think, truly. And, to see how I blame them, sometimes, out of frustration with medicine that just wallops me, to see me go through that and end up (hopefully) simply understanding that perhaps it is simply the medicines, not the messenger, which is at fault. Perhaps too, they may see that I try as well as I may. The reason I think this is that, as soon as I wrote about the medicines I received and that I would not take anything new (at least until I spoke with someone about it), I received a call the very next day about that very matter, and weeks after my appointment (they could have called at any time, the timing seems interesting). There are other items, but that is enough for now.
I can see it, too, as many people do read blogs. If their profession or work place is included in a blog, they might well search for it. All it would take is one snooper to find it and then share it. Then it might easily become a distraction during lulls, or even an after work curiosity. I am sure, if that is so, my bold angry suggestions and conservative notions bend more than a few noses out of joint. But it might cause pause for thought and a different perspective if that initial hatred can be overcome. Still, it is funny. I am pretty sure the last college I attended also looked in. Oddly, I found that I received mostly good reactions, and understanding. But, they were good people as I came to know. I do think most are, most people, or they desperately try and want to be. Though, as I have written, being good is not a concept of self and it is not as easy as 'being nice', it requires much work, planning, and follow through. And still we fail, if there is a way for that to be mitigated as well. If not a of much worth at anything great within or without of the Church, I do attempt to at least profess.
I am really chewing through the bible. And, as I said, I am attempting not to study. This initial re-reading is simply to lay the groundwork for study. When read, and I find something I do not understand while studying, then it is a simpler thing to go to the reference books and have a feeling for the reference. As well, much of what I am reading is going into the big brain intake machine and, hopefully along with the Holy Spirit, is guiding that very powerful subconscious matter to wisdom and learning converter. I am halfway through 1 Corinthians.
I am not trying to speed read though I am not dallying. I do not set a number of page quota. I do not even track it. I simply read when I have little else to do, feel a compulsion, or even as a bedtime activity to calm me before prayer. When I finish, I will need to begin finding or buying study books for the various books. There are some other books out there which help a good deal as well. Through time, I should be able to allocate reasonable resources to this life long project and have at my disposal some of the more important tomes and other writings. As well, I am quite sure there are many great writers who will add to my understanding. Chesterton to Aquinas to any number of nuns, priests, and the rest who have helped define what is my Church. Or, I should say, the Church to which I am a member.
I hope to find a decent dry cleaner this week, and get some things tended so as to feel more comfortable at church. I have two or three sets of clothes out which I could wear to Church, but some of the items are quite wrinkled. I also have several sets of good shoes. But what makes me nervous is not knowing exactly what is appropriate and socially acceptable to wear initially. Some churches are quite strict and conservative, some are quite liberal (not my preferred), and many will tell you it does not matter what you were, but to my mind it really does. Those not dressed properly for the wedding feast are thrown out. And, though I will relax my wear a bit to be more social, I will not dishonor the feast of my Host.
Lots left to do, some things done, time is ticking, but this day is done. I have enjoyed it immensely. I will need to do many things in the next few days, most of it can be done very quickly or even here at home. I am trying to hydrate, but it is difficult to drink enough water here, I think, over long periods of time. I try to keep a jug of water at the ready, and a glass in which to pour it, and a pint or two an hour seems simple enough, but life happens and time flies so that it is not so simple. And, water gets boring. Perhaps the soda water will help, and I do love it. Oh, naps are nice on busy days, no? Yes, if you are not sure I thought I would help. Yes they are.
That is that for that. Have a great day!
.
Today has been a roundly satisfying success. To be sure, I could have done more. Also to be sure, I could have failed on many accounts. I have finished most of my list from the start of the week and completed several other things, if all minor. I was able to travel, track ongoing works, be on time, and take care of all the little details I had hoped at least within what I was doing. I cannot say I am back on track but that I was able to successfully negotiate the day has been good for my sorely put upon confidence.
My Mom called and it seems she will be going to the upcoming family reunion for our family of friends. So, I will need to see about lodging. Since half of the reason for going was to see her, this will be great. The food will be fantastic, you must trust me. But to see people from my childhood, some of them who still linger in direct memory and some who may return to memory when met, should be a fine exploration of my youth and, more importantly, the rest of their stories. There is one in particular, a kindly woman who I remember as the quiet person while sometimes the world stormed around my little life. It will be very good to see her. She stands out as a saint in my mind, and I think she is one. Especially if she does not know it, more so probably.
I have some reason to believe that someone in the V.A. reads my blog. No, I am not paranoid about it. I think it is good for them to see what some of us think, truly. And, to see how I blame them, sometimes, out of frustration with medicine that just wallops me, to see me go through that and end up (hopefully) simply understanding that perhaps it is simply the medicines, not the messenger, which is at fault. Perhaps too, they may see that I try as well as I may. The reason I think this is that, as soon as I wrote about the medicines I received and that I would not take anything new (at least until I spoke with someone about it), I received a call the very next day about that very matter, and weeks after my appointment (they could have called at any time, the timing seems interesting). There are other items, but that is enough for now.
I can see it, too, as many people do read blogs. If their profession or work place is included in a blog, they might well search for it. All it would take is one snooper to find it and then share it. Then it might easily become a distraction during lulls, or even an after work curiosity. I am sure, if that is so, my bold angry suggestions and conservative notions bend more than a few noses out of joint. But it might cause pause for thought and a different perspective if that initial hatred can be overcome. Still, it is funny. I am pretty sure the last college I attended also looked in. Oddly, I found that I received mostly good reactions, and understanding. But, they were good people as I came to know. I do think most are, most people, or they desperately try and want to be. Though, as I have written, being good is not a concept of self and it is not as easy as 'being nice', it requires much work, planning, and follow through. And still we fail, if there is a way for that to be mitigated as well. If not a of much worth at anything great within or without of the Church, I do attempt to at least profess.
I am really chewing through the bible. And, as I said, I am attempting not to study. This initial re-reading is simply to lay the groundwork for study. When read, and I find something I do not understand while studying, then it is a simpler thing to go to the reference books and have a feeling for the reference. As well, much of what I am reading is going into the big brain intake machine and, hopefully along with the Holy Spirit, is guiding that very powerful subconscious matter to wisdom and learning converter. I am halfway through 1 Corinthians.
I am not trying to speed read though I am not dallying. I do not set a number of page quota. I do not even track it. I simply read when I have little else to do, feel a compulsion, or even as a bedtime activity to calm me before prayer. When I finish, I will need to begin finding or buying study books for the various books. There are some other books out there which help a good deal as well. Through time, I should be able to allocate reasonable resources to this life long project and have at my disposal some of the more important tomes and other writings. As well, I am quite sure there are many great writers who will add to my understanding. Chesterton to Aquinas to any number of nuns, priests, and the rest who have helped define what is my Church. Or, I should say, the Church to which I am a member.
I hope to find a decent dry cleaner this week, and get some things tended so as to feel more comfortable at church. I have two or three sets of clothes out which I could wear to Church, but some of the items are quite wrinkled. I also have several sets of good shoes. But what makes me nervous is not knowing exactly what is appropriate and socially acceptable to wear initially. Some churches are quite strict and conservative, some are quite liberal (not my preferred), and many will tell you it does not matter what you were, but to my mind it really does. Those not dressed properly for the wedding feast are thrown out. And, though I will relax my wear a bit to be more social, I will not dishonor the feast of my Host.
Lots left to do, some things done, time is ticking, but this day is done. I have enjoyed it immensely. I will need to do many things in the next few days, most of it can be done very quickly or even here at home. I am trying to hydrate, but it is difficult to drink enough water here, I think, over long periods of time. I try to keep a jug of water at the ready, and a glass in which to pour it, and a pint or two an hour seems simple enough, but life happens and time flies so that it is not so simple. And, water gets boring. Perhaps the soda water will help, and I do love it. Oh, naps are nice on busy days, no? Yes, if you are not sure I thought I would help. Yes they are.
That is that for that. Have a great day!
Not a bad trip at all.
.
.
I was a bit surprised at how well I slept. How easy it was to wake up, eat, shower and all. And then the drive was simply pleasant. Not that I am not a bit weary, but then I ought to be. It is a bit of a drive, traffic was from heavy to get out and walk speed heavy, and it is not my usual time of day. I enjoyed it, oddly, immensely. And, the end of my trip there, the V.A. Hospital, was a pleasant thing. Not only did I have no difficulty finding the V.A. Hospital, there was plenty of easy access parking. The lot was both large and the spaces large enough for easy use. It looked to be a clean facility. And, to my notions, it was very good.
I was seen on time, maybe a bit early. The young woman, an intern (are optometrists/ophthalmologists trainees called interns?), saw me and did most of my review. My eyes, it seems have improved. They had been the same for many (7?) years until now. She kept trying to get me to ask for bifocals. Simply put, I do not need them. She tried three or four times, and I kept saying that I do not need them at all. After she did this, that, and some other things, she set up the machine for glasses. After she finished, the doctor came in, did a few things here and there, critiqued and adjusted, and was quite thorough. I have need of another test, but that is in another part of the building and they could not do that today. He talked to me about diabetes and a few other things. Apparently most people with my vision have strengthened nerves in one part of the eye, while I have weakened ones, hence in part the extra test. I think it bugs them that I have not gone blind, that my eyes have improved, and that other things do not support much of their understanding about eyes, diabetes, and high blood pressure. I simply do not fit the mold.
Okay, fine. I will, as I said, begin changing my diet a bit. I will quit fast food, I have already quit regular soda again, and I will watch some things I eat. But I will not quit milk, cheese (though it is a rarity), and real foods. I will quit sugar, though I had not really returned to it, and I will watch things a bit. No more medicine though, it does not work. More water, though, but for more reasons than just this. Oh, he suggested Arizona green tea, diet, which uses Splenda or the equivalent. He, it seems, has his own issues with diabetes.
As I was leaving, I decided to put in a travel chit. They did not have me do the paperwork, they merely took my name and last four, typed it into the machine, and had me step over to the check out counter. The form needed was being printed as I stepped over. They gave me cash on the spot, and it was pretty dear. I was quite surprised, and pleased. Being low on cash this month, it was nice.
The drive back went smoothly. Even though they did dilate my eyes, the sunglasses worked perfectly. Without them, everybody had halos, or more karma rings. Well, the appearance of such. I did pull in and look over the organic place I had written about. It was easy enough to find and I have figured out the best way to get into their lot. It is not as big as I might have thought, but it should do quite well. On to home. I ran into more traffic problems on the way home than the way up, but the jam was short lived, and after only a hundred miles, I could again drive over 2 mph. I fib.
When I arrived in Logan, I decided to stop at my storage unit. I had to dig and peck and restack to find what I was looking for, but I did find it. And I found another box with engineering and math books I had considered bringing back. That takes care of what I wanted from the storage. Now to start getting things from here to there. And, though I really want a nap, I need to stay up long enough to get the vehicle sticker and ask about the places to advertise again. I just hope I do not talk funny for being tired. My voice goes up in pitch and down in volume, when I am extremely tired. It makes me sound weak, mostly because I am at those times.
Not bad. I wonder if drinking a lot more water and non-sugary drinks will help me out of this funk. I sure hope so. Today is the start of that re-hydration process. If it works, I should know by next Wednesday.
Have a great day!
.
I was a bit surprised at how well I slept. How easy it was to wake up, eat, shower and all. And then the drive was simply pleasant. Not that I am not a bit weary, but then I ought to be. It is a bit of a drive, traffic was from heavy to get out and walk speed heavy, and it is not my usual time of day. I enjoyed it, oddly, immensely. And, the end of my trip there, the V.A. Hospital, was a pleasant thing. Not only did I have no difficulty finding the V.A. Hospital, there was plenty of easy access parking. The lot was both large and the spaces large enough for easy use. It looked to be a clean facility. And, to my notions, it was very good.
I was seen on time, maybe a bit early. The young woman, an intern (are optometrists/ophthalmologists trainees called interns?), saw me and did most of my review. My eyes, it seems have improved. They had been the same for many (7?) years until now. She kept trying to get me to ask for bifocals. Simply put, I do not need them. She tried three or four times, and I kept saying that I do not need them at all. After she did this, that, and some other things, she set up the machine for glasses. After she finished, the doctor came in, did a few things here and there, critiqued and adjusted, and was quite thorough. I have need of another test, but that is in another part of the building and they could not do that today. He talked to me about diabetes and a few other things. Apparently most people with my vision have strengthened nerves in one part of the eye, while I have weakened ones, hence in part the extra test. I think it bugs them that I have not gone blind, that my eyes have improved, and that other things do not support much of their understanding about eyes, diabetes, and high blood pressure. I simply do not fit the mold.
Okay, fine. I will, as I said, begin changing my diet a bit. I will quit fast food, I have already quit regular soda again, and I will watch some things I eat. But I will not quit milk, cheese (though it is a rarity), and real foods. I will quit sugar, though I had not really returned to it, and I will watch things a bit. No more medicine though, it does not work. More water, though, but for more reasons than just this. Oh, he suggested Arizona green tea, diet, which uses Splenda or the equivalent. He, it seems, has his own issues with diabetes.
As I was leaving, I decided to put in a travel chit. They did not have me do the paperwork, they merely took my name and last four, typed it into the machine, and had me step over to the check out counter. The form needed was being printed as I stepped over. They gave me cash on the spot, and it was pretty dear. I was quite surprised, and pleased. Being low on cash this month, it was nice.
The drive back went smoothly. Even though they did dilate my eyes, the sunglasses worked perfectly. Without them, everybody had halos, or more karma rings. Well, the appearance of such. I did pull in and look over the organic place I had written about. It was easy enough to find and I have figured out the best way to get into their lot. It is not as big as I might have thought, but it should do quite well. On to home. I ran into more traffic problems on the way home than the way up, but the jam was short lived, and after only a hundred miles, I could again drive over 2 mph. I fib.
When I arrived in Logan, I decided to stop at my storage unit. I had to dig and peck and restack to find what I was looking for, but I did find it. And I found another box with engineering and math books I had considered bringing back. That takes care of what I wanted from the storage. Now to start getting things from here to there. And, though I really want a nap, I need to stay up long enough to get the vehicle sticker and ask about the places to advertise again. I just hope I do not talk funny for being tired. My voice goes up in pitch and down in volume, when I am extremely tired. It makes me sound weak, mostly because I am at those times.
Not bad. I wonder if drinking a lot more water and non-sugary drinks will help me out of this funk. I sure hope so. Today is the start of that re-hydration process. If it works, I should know by next Wednesday.
Have a great day!
I just thought of something.
.
.
The problems I am having, though indeed have roots in the medicine, may have another additive that I can correct. Dehydration plagued me when I first arrived. I have since been able to get by with a great deal less water. However, going on the medicine may have once again increased my need for hydration. Add to that, I have been drinking the wrong kind of fluid, namely soda, and my problems may have been added then compounded. One of the reasons for buying the soda siphon was to get away from sweetened soda altogether. Which I am doing. But now, to add to how much regular water I am drinking again.
It is all the minor details. Bits and pieces. I cannot be sure this will help, or if it is even wise on these medications. It is worth a shot though. Who wants to live with perilous conditions? I promise you, I do not prefer death, it is merely that I will not choose vast incapacity and duration over a fully lived life and a natural death. I do hope this works. I have a few more weeks to try this out.
Oops, best be getting on the road.
Good day, again!
.
The problems I am having, though indeed have roots in the medicine, may have another additive that I can correct. Dehydration plagued me when I first arrived. I have since been able to get by with a great deal less water. However, going on the medicine may have once again increased my need for hydration. Add to that, I have been drinking the wrong kind of fluid, namely soda, and my problems may have been added then compounded. One of the reasons for buying the soda siphon was to get away from sweetened soda altogether. Which I am doing. But now, to add to how much regular water I am drinking again.
It is all the minor details. Bits and pieces. I cannot be sure this will help, or if it is even wise on these medications. It is worth a shot though. Who wants to live with perilous conditions? I promise you, I do not prefer death, it is merely that I will not choose vast incapacity and duration over a fully lived life and a natural death. I do hope this works. I have a few more weeks to try this out.
Oops, best be getting on the road.
Good day, again!
Problematic, but there is a timer running down.
.
.
I have been having side affect issues again. I have been having headaches and neck aches, if not quite as bad as before these also seem to have become impervious to Tylenol. As well, fever has been coming and going and more so than just flashes. And, of course, exhaustion is back with me, worse than I have had it since I have been here. I did promise I would take these medicines for a month. If they have significantly functioned AND she would consider an additive at the end of my trial period, I might consider continuation. That is a slim chance, so I fully expect to end my medication and involvement with the medical side of the establishment out here when next I visit. Medicine is only for some people I guess.
I was able to sleep well and easily last night at about 18:00 (in spite of having slept 12 hours and waking at 14:00, if that tells you anything). I woke at 2:00, just now, got up, and made a decent breakfast of eggs, a sausage, a very thin pork chop, potatoes, coffee, and milk. It sounds like a lot, and to some it probably is, but to me, it is probably about the right sized meal for a busy day. I will drink the last of the coffee and make another round of it, mostly for on the road. Oh, and I ought to take another round of Tylenol, just in case it might start working again or might prevent the systems from getting worse.
I should be back in time to take care of the final things on my list, minus a fingerprint card. I will have to look over the data sheet the police office offered me, just in case there is one police agency which will do it in the afternoon. I glanced at it quickly, yesterday, and maybe too quickly. I was already becoming exhausted when I received it. I have to wonder if I really need it, but I do want that cleared up. Most sheriffs do not abide by that, not bothering to check NICS in any case, when handing out permits. Which should tell people something. But I want this thing tended. I am pretty sure it is an improper breach of my real civil rights based on some liberal's (mis)interpretation of the law. Anything created in part for and in part by the Brady bunch (half a mind to quit) is probably just what I suggest it is.
One of the things on my list today is target practice. This time I am going to move the target much closer and see if I can figure out my aiming problem. Part of my problem is not being able to see my shots. Yes, I probably could take the spotting scope, but that would mean single shots, then trying to see if I could spot that particular shot, then re-aiming, then... Plus, as is, so much stuff is going to the range that it is becoming a busy thing. I know, it cannot all be fun, but darn it, it should not all be work either.
Still, if it means anything, I am doing better than Iowa, regardless of the medicines. But it is fast becoming only as good as the best I did in Iowa which is clearly unacceptable. I would not be able to, in good conscience, attempt school as is. And, I probably would not be able to do any outdoor activities in this condition either. I do have options, as do they, but if no one blinks, this game is over. And, as I said, if all that is left to me is a short time of retirement and outdoor activity, then a quick death, I am good with that. Of course, I do not believe my doctors either, necessarily. I have had, pretty much untreatable, high blood pressure for over a decade now. How deadly could it be? The lowest I have seen it, for the most part, is 158/110 and it ranges up to 207/127. I do not think they understand the term deadly. Ha!
I was able to use my soda siphon correctly the second time. I looked over the parts and they are metal, so I was less worried about breaking anything. Still, I just tightened it to what I had thought was good enough initially, then gave it just a little extra. It is great, drinking it alone or adding it to juice or such has been good. I am glad I bought two, as one goes pretty fast. Though I may end up going through a lot of cartridges quickly, so I ought to ration a bit. Finally, after wanting this thing for 5 years, I have it.
Oh, I had hoped to get stuff moved from the house to storage and a few things back. That will, most likely, have to wait until tomorrow (or the next day, or even the day after that, considering how I am doing). Still, I can begin round up and stacking what is to go back. What is to be brought home is only one box of goods I forgot to bring back. It is the study material for physics, calculus, and something else. And I never did end up taking notes from the online courses I had meant get done. But after the appointment today, I should have a good bit of time to be more active in the cave, since being out will still be too hot and my ability to get out has shrunk. Hmm, if I end up quitting meds as I suspect I will be doing, I will be doing that right at the right time to get out hiking and camping and fishing, right as the weather will be cooling to make life out there more bearable.
Oh, and the other thing on my list, that of getting information about where to place an add for this apartment, will be done today as well. I have to stop in and visit with the manager anyway. We need to have stickers for our vehicles to park in the lot here at the apartment complex after September (I believe), or we will have our vehicle booted or towed. Today is the last day, officially, to do that. So, I best get in and get that. Yes, I am mostly just treading water, at this point. I am no longer swimming and I have no direction. One way or another, this will end come the 11th, my next appointment and the end of my promised taking of medicine.
I think I will tinker a bit, then shower in an hour, and get ready to go. Bah, I need to shave again! Oh, the Tylenol did take the edge off the pain. The fever and overall feeling of swelling and dissociation remains, but at least most of the achyness has dissipated, for a while. At least I have kept my word about the medicine, in spite of it all.
Have a great day!
.
I have been having side affect issues again. I have been having headaches and neck aches, if not quite as bad as before these also seem to have become impervious to Tylenol. As well, fever has been coming and going and more so than just flashes. And, of course, exhaustion is back with me, worse than I have had it since I have been here. I did promise I would take these medicines for a month. If they have significantly functioned AND she would consider an additive at the end of my trial period, I might consider continuation. That is a slim chance, so I fully expect to end my medication and involvement with the medical side of the establishment out here when next I visit. Medicine is only for some people I guess.
I was able to sleep well and easily last night at about 18:00 (in spite of having slept 12 hours and waking at 14:00, if that tells you anything). I woke at 2:00, just now, got up, and made a decent breakfast of eggs, a sausage, a very thin pork chop, potatoes, coffee, and milk. It sounds like a lot, and to some it probably is, but to me, it is probably about the right sized meal for a busy day. I will drink the last of the coffee and make another round of it, mostly for on the road. Oh, and I ought to take another round of Tylenol, just in case it might start working again or might prevent the systems from getting worse.
I should be back in time to take care of the final things on my list, minus a fingerprint card. I will have to look over the data sheet the police office offered me, just in case there is one police agency which will do it in the afternoon. I glanced at it quickly, yesterday, and maybe too quickly. I was already becoming exhausted when I received it. I have to wonder if I really need it, but I do want that cleared up. Most sheriffs do not abide by that, not bothering to check NICS in any case, when handing out permits. Which should tell people something. But I want this thing tended. I am pretty sure it is an improper breach of my real civil rights based on some liberal's (mis)interpretation of the law. Anything created in part for and in part by the Brady bunch (half a mind to quit) is probably just what I suggest it is.
One of the things on my list today is target practice. This time I am going to move the target much closer and see if I can figure out my aiming problem. Part of my problem is not being able to see my shots. Yes, I probably could take the spotting scope, but that would mean single shots, then trying to see if I could spot that particular shot, then re-aiming, then... Plus, as is, so much stuff is going to the range that it is becoming a busy thing. I know, it cannot all be fun, but darn it, it should not all be work either.
Still, if it means anything, I am doing better than Iowa, regardless of the medicines. But it is fast becoming only as good as the best I did in Iowa which is clearly unacceptable. I would not be able to, in good conscience, attempt school as is. And, I probably would not be able to do any outdoor activities in this condition either. I do have options, as do they, but if no one blinks, this game is over. And, as I said, if all that is left to me is a short time of retirement and outdoor activity, then a quick death, I am good with that. Of course, I do not believe my doctors either, necessarily. I have had, pretty much untreatable, high blood pressure for over a decade now. How deadly could it be? The lowest I have seen it, for the most part, is 158/110 and it ranges up to 207/127. I do not think they understand the term deadly. Ha!
I was able to use my soda siphon correctly the second time. I looked over the parts and they are metal, so I was less worried about breaking anything. Still, I just tightened it to what I had thought was good enough initially, then gave it just a little extra. It is great, drinking it alone or adding it to juice or such has been good. I am glad I bought two, as one goes pretty fast. Though I may end up going through a lot of cartridges quickly, so I ought to ration a bit. Finally, after wanting this thing for 5 years, I have it.
Oh, I had hoped to get stuff moved from the house to storage and a few things back. That will, most likely, have to wait until tomorrow (or the next day, or even the day after that, considering how I am doing). Still, I can begin round up and stacking what is to go back. What is to be brought home is only one box of goods I forgot to bring back. It is the study material for physics, calculus, and something else. And I never did end up taking notes from the online courses I had meant get done. But after the appointment today, I should have a good bit of time to be more active in the cave, since being out will still be too hot and my ability to get out has shrunk. Hmm, if I end up quitting meds as I suspect I will be doing, I will be doing that right at the right time to get out hiking and camping and fishing, right as the weather will be cooling to make life out there more bearable.
Oh, and the other thing on my list, that of getting information about where to place an add for this apartment, will be done today as well. I have to stop in and visit with the manager anyway. We need to have stickers for our vehicles to park in the lot here at the apartment complex after September (I believe), or we will have our vehicle booted or towed. Today is the last day, officially, to do that. So, I best get in and get that. Yes, I am mostly just treading water, at this point. I am no longer swimming and I have no direction. One way or another, this will end come the 11th, my next appointment and the end of my promised taking of medicine.
I think I will tinker a bit, then shower in an hour, and get ready to go. Bah, I need to shave again! Oh, the Tylenol did take the edge off the pain. The fever and overall feeling of swelling and dissociation remains, but at least most of the achyness has dissipated, for a while. At least I have kept my word about the medicine, in spite of it all.
Have a great day!
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
A tough couple of days.
.
.
I did not get done yesterday what I had planned. I did make it to the store but that was it. Today was only slightly better. I went to the police station to get a fingerprint card, but they no longer do that. They offered me a number of other places which do this but they do it in the mornings. I also, today, called to see if my appointments were correct, and they are. Then I asked to be switched to pharmacy. After speaking with them, it does seem as though they sent the medicine, so that must have been the package that was returned. And, they did not have my apartment number in my address, as the post office card had suggested was the problem, so we corrected that. When I arrived home, I found packages from the V.A. One of them had been opened, so I can use nothing in it. But it contained weird things, medicine I have not been prescribed here, and one medicine I have not been prescribed anywhere, a pill for high cholesterol (which I do not have). The box contained a Accu-Chek blood glucose reader (which I knew was probably a problem).
But I did not receive a water pill or the rest of my 90 day supply of high blood pressure medicine, I can hope when they get it back they will use my full address. In any case, I am not going to take anything else, certainly without talking to my doctor (nurse practitioner), and not until I get the high blood pressure squared away or decided against treatment(s) in any case. One thing at a time, and maybe none of it if they push too hard or fast. If I need 5 pills to stay alive, along with their screwy side affects, then I guess I am going to die. Screw that and the horse it rides in on. But I will check my blood sugar.
Oh well. Back to the start. I really thought I could take charge of my medicine, the high blood pressure pills anyway, but it looks like not. It is pounding me into the ground, again. Still, I will take it until the month is over, and see where we can negotiate from there. If nothing else, I should have dental and eye covered by then. I may end up not being interested, at all, in anything else.
My birthday present arrived today. I have produced my first bottle of fizzy water with it. I will have to practice with it though. I did not tighten it enough, so that when I installed the CO2 cartridge, I took a minor shower. I can definitely tighten it tighter, but I tend to break things if I do not use utmost care. I strip things with less than my maximum hand tightening ability, so I try to err on the side of caution. With everything being plastic today, I have to use even more caution. Still, I think I can get this to work right and well in no time.
My first appointment, with the eye doctor, at the V.A. in SLC is tomorrow at 8:30. So, I will need to try and sleep and rest as I can to be ready for the two to three hour drive (and start a little earlier still, as there may be traffic jams on the way). Since it is the eye clinic, I can have breakfast if I get there too early. I bet they are going to dilate too, which will mean I really need to take sun glasses, and probably wait there an hour or two after the procedure. I truly hate that test. But I know they need it.
Good day.
.
I did not get done yesterday what I had planned. I did make it to the store but that was it. Today was only slightly better. I went to the police station to get a fingerprint card, but they no longer do that. They offered me a number of other places which do this but they do it in the mornings. I also, today, called to see if my appointments were correct, and they are. Then I asked to be switched to pharmacy. After speaking with them, it does seem as though they sent the medicine, so that must have been the package that was returned. And, they did not have my apartment number in my address, as the post office card had suggested was the problem, so we corrected that. When I arrived home, I found packages from the V.A. One of them had been opened, so I can use nothing in it. But it contained weird things, medicine I have not been prescribed here, and one medicine I have not been prescribed anywhere, a pill for high cholesterol (which I do not have). The box contained a Accu-Chek blood glucose reader (which I knew was probably a problem).
But I did not receive a water pill or the rest of my 90 day supply of high blood pressure medicine, I can hope when they get it back they will use my full address. In any case, I am not going to take anything else, certainly without talking to my doctor (nurse practitioner), and not until I get the high blood pressure squared away or decided against treatment(s) in any case. One thing at a time, and maybe none of it if they push too hard or fast. If I need 5 pills to stay alive, along with their screwy side affects, then I guess I am going to die. Screw that and the horse it rides in on. But I will check my blood sugar.
Oh well. Back to the start. I really thought I could take charge of my medicine, the high blood pressure pills anyway, but it looks like not. It is pounding me into the ground, again. Still, I will take it until the month is over, and see where we can negotiate from there. If nothing else, I should have dental and eye covered by then. I may end up not being interested, at all, in anything else.
My birthday present arrived today. I have produced my first bottle of fizzy water with it. I will have to practice with it though. I did not tighten it enough, so that when I installed the CO2 cartridge, I took a minor shower. I can definitely tighten it tighter, but I tend to break things if I do not use utmost care. I strip things with less than my maximum hand tightening ability, so I try to err on the side of caution. With everything being plastic today, I have to use even more caution. Still, I think I can get this to work right and well in no time.
My first appointment, with the eye doctor, at the V.A. in SLC is tomorrow at 8:30. So, I will need to try and sleep and rest as I can to be ready for the two to three hour drive (and start a little earlier still, as there may be traffic jams on the way). Since it is the eye clinic, I can have breakfast if I get there too early. I bet they are going to dilate too, which will mean I really need to take sun glasses, and probably wait there an hour or two after the procedure. I truly hate that test. But I know they need it.
Good day.
Monday, August 24, 2009
A potentially good start.
.
.
I was able to sleep when I went to bed last night. It was a good sleep too, if it felt short. I think I got enough sleep if it feels a bit tight. I was in the process of arm wrestling my alarm clock's snooze button, again, again, again, when my Mom called. She was on the side of the alarm clock. Splitter! (from Monty Python's "Life of Brian", in case you are curious where my mind is) It was good to hear from her. She is still not sure if she will be going to Texas. It depends on if my brother's wife gets a job there. She is so sure (hopeful?) that she will be getting the job that she is packing. I do not share her confidence. It sounds like she is desperate. I somehow suspect her spending and their house costs have sent them so far into the red they have only hope. Still, I pray for them, that it be God's will though. Sometimes people have to fall before they can stand properly. I know that part, and it is hard, so I pray.
I finally heard back from one of my friends through email. He was indeed on vacation but they did not have time to stop while out here. He got some fishing in, fly fishing actually, and it sounds like he did well. He has finished his work at college, too, so the vacation was probably a great boon and a reward at once. He may start applying for work this fall. Hopefully they will get a spot here in Logan, barring that perhaps somewhere in Utah. If not here, hopefully he will get a job. With colleges cutting back, this is a tough time for seeking an academic position. He is one academic, among several I know, who I respect. His work really has merit, the subject of his work is of interest to me and is relevant to me and other Americans at least, and he is quite good at it. Plus, he is a good moral man with a strong family and a solid Christian faith, plus he hunts and fishes. So I pray for them.
Fine, I pray for all academics, as I do for other elites. I pray that, even if they are apart from God, that they will do His will and come to know and accept Him and His Word and word. I pray for the president and current administration, the house, the senate, and the Supreme Court. Christ did not come for those who knew but for those who did not know or understand. For one of the lost to be saved is a great thing, greater than anything we can know. So, I pray. Though, in truth, I have no worries about God's will being done. It will be and is being done, if His will was that Christ be turned over, scourged, and executed too. I guess I pray that people get in line with His will rather than just be dark pawns of it, doing it reluctantly or meaning to be against it in spite of the impossibility of that.
Lots of things to do today. A shower and shave would be a good start. I might also need to see about a hair cut. When my hair gets (comparatively) long, it become difficult to keep neat and takes much more shampoo to clean. Like it or not, in spite of our faith and charity and spirituality and such, we still live in gnarly bodies. We have oil, sweat, salt, and then collect dirt the more so for that. It gives us something to think about, and in more ways then one. One might say that our body is our first obligation and subject we must tend. And, so I will. It is nice, here, to finally be able to tend the different grooming needs, and well, again and finally.
Rain continues, as they said it would, and it is nice and cool today. I have few excuses for not getting things done. Still, I am dragging low and moving slowly. I have had a cup of coffee and will probably have the remnants of the French press shortly. I have weakened the coffee, making it more like normal strength, rather than the strength my lady friend like it. Otherwise it was giving me the jitters. I hope this helps. I am not sure, actually, that I like coffee. But it does move the my internals to satisfying ends (pun intended) and it does step up the metabolism. It does have it's uses.
Well, I think I will tinker in order that I might wake a bit better. Then a shower and such and then I am off.
Have a great day!
.
I was able to sleep when I went to bed last night. It was a good sleep too, if it felt short. I think I got enough sleep if it feels a bit tight. I was in the process of arm wrestling my alarm clock's snooze button, again, again, again, when my Mom called. She was on the side of the alarm clock. Splitter! (from Monty Python's "Life of Brian", in case you are curious where my mind is) It was good to hear from her. She is still not sure if she will be going to Texas. It depends on if my brother's wife gets a job there. She is so sure (hopeful?) that she will be getting the job that she is packing. I do not share her confidence. It sounds like she is desperate. I somehow suspect her spending and their house costs have sent them so far into the red they have only hope. Still, I pray for them, that it be God's will though. Sometimes people have to fall before they can stand properly. I know that part, and it is hard, so I pray.
I finally heard back from one of my friends through email. He was indeed on vacation but they did not have time to stop while out here. He got some fishing in, fly fishing actually, and it sounds like he did well. He has finished his work at college, too, so the vacation was probably a great boon and a reward at once. He may start applying for work this fall. Hopefully they will get a spot here in Logan, barring that perhaps somewhere in Utah. If not here, hopefully he will get a job. With colleges cutting back, this is a tough time for seeking an academic position. He is one academic, among several I know, who I respect. His work really has merit, the subject of his work is of interest to me and is relevant to me and other Americans at least, and he is quite good at it. Plus, he is a good moral man with a strong family and a solid Christian faith, plus he hunts and fishes. So I pray for them.
Fine, I pray for all academics, as I do for other elites. I pray that, even if they are apart from God, that they will do His will and come to know and accept Him and His Word and word. I pray for the president and current administration, the house, the senate, and the Supreme Court. Christ did not come for those who knew but for those who did not know or understand. For one of the lost to be saved is a great thing, greater than anything we can know. So, I pray. Though, in truth, I have no worries about God's will being done. It will be and is being done, if His will was that Christ be turned over, scourged, and executed too. I guess I pray that people get in line with His will rather than just be dark pawns of it, doing it reluctantly or meaning to be against it in spite of the impossibility of that.
Lots of things to do today. A shower and shave would be a good start. I might also need to see about a hair cut. When my hair gets (comparatively) long, it become difficult to keep neat and takes much more shampoo to clean. Like it or not, in spite of our faith and charity and spirituality and such, we still live in gnarly bodies. We have oil, sweat, salt, and then collect dirt the more so for that. It gives us something to think about, and in more ways then one. One might say that our body is our first obligation and subject we must tend. And, so I will. It is nice, here, to finally be able to tend the different grooming needs, and well, again and finally.
Rain continues, as they said it would, and it is nice and cool today. I have few excuses for not getting things done. Still, I am dragging low and moving slowly. I have had a cup of coffee and will probably have the remnants of the French press shortly. I have weakened the coffee, making it more like normal strength, rather than the strength my lady friend like it. Otherwise it was giving me the jitters. I hope this helps. I am not sure, actually, that I like coffee. But it does move the my internals to satisfying ends (pun intended) and it does step up the metabolism. It does have it's uses.
Well, I think I will tinker in order that I might wake a bit better. Then a shower and such and then I am off.
Have a great day!
John was the former, Jesus the latter, according to some.
.
.
I am reminded, or simply remember, as I am reading the bible where Christ mentions that when John came to them, he ate little and drank nothing strong, so they accused him of being possessed, and when Christ came to them eating and drinking, they accused him of being a glutton and drunkard. Now, when I hear people say that drinking is a sin, especially Christians, I have news for them, the Good News, the Word, or our Lord, however you wish to put it, was both sin free and He drank. Yes, I have had a beer, but that is not the point.
I have heard that hereabouts if it becomes known that one drinks, one might well be classified as a drunkard. And, in some cases, I think that may be true. Those who drink publicly here, do so against the social normals. And if they are willing to do so, they are very possibly out of control, if they come from here. Though, that may not be absolutely true, it has potential to be true. For those of us not of this area and culture, this may not be so true. As with many of the Christian belief systems, there is something against drink which I simply do not understand.
Further, Christ indicated that it is not what one consumes that makes one profane, but what one says. And, coming from the Jewish traditions (and if we still held to those) wine was not considered profane at all. As with anything, abuse or over use were and are considered minor sins, and it is believed they could lead to greater sins. As they said, they certainly knew and used terms such as drunkard and glutton.
Now, I have noticed that a drink or beer goes a long way hereabouts. Whether it is the heat, the lack of humidity, the altitude, some other factors, or a mix of any or all of that I cannot be sure. Three beers does me quite well, a shot of (or better, shot in a tumbler and on the rocks with cleaned water) of my keg strength good scotch will punch my ticket. And so I drink slowly and enjoy those fruits carefully. And, if it is considered in poor taste to drink here, then I will consume my alcohol more privately. Beyond being less expensive, drinking at home and alone or in small company is both less expensive and less risky in many ways.
I should add this though. Even if I do not agree with any ecumenical causation for ending the entertainment of my chosen libations, I will not say that for many, drinking might wisely be forsworn. For many, there is no self control with some things. And, these nectar can lead to worse things, both in actions and in other consumables. I would guess 70% of people may use these to enrich there lives, add a little excitement and pleasure, and be free of any excesses or destruction. But that leaves 30% who will lose their lives, parts of their lives, their freedoms in more ways than one, and totally wipe out on the stuff. So, if I were a gambling man at all, I would think it wise if never tried to never try. But I am not among those so I will continue, if with caution.
Tomorrow must be a busy day. I will try to rise earlier and get going, but I can make no promises here. I can only put my best foot forward when I am awake to do so, if I may too attempt to wake that foot early enough to do some day long works. I would reward myself should I do well, but this will have to be pro bono, for I am a poor lad, guy, old guy, whatever. Still, when I cannot reward (or bribe), a smile and congratulations along with the knowledge that I have done well has happily sufficed in the past. It even works for other people if they know you have nothing else to offer.
Off to bed, I do believe. If I can sleep now, I have a better chance at rising and doing my good deeds. This blog is excellent, sometimes. I forget what all is on my list frequently. If too, I have to slow down, turn on the machine, look around till I find it, then head out the door. How easy it is to forget one thing on even a minor list. So, here is my list again. I need to go grocery shopping, get fingerprinted, find out where I can post this apartment contract, call the VA and check on medicines and appointments, and do some more target practice with the .22 rifle.
I could also, if I have time and energy (and I might since it should be cool), take some things from here to the storage unit and bring a few things from the storage unit back to here (many more things to there than from there). Cleaning up the place, a bit, and doing some vacuuming now that it is working, might not be a bad plan either.
Well, do not look at me like that. It could happen. No, no really. :P *pftffft*
Good night, D.C. and Mrs. D.C.
.
I am reminded, or simply remember, as I am reading the bible where Christ mentions that when John came to them, he ate little and drank nothing strong, so they accused him of being possessed, and when Christ came to them eating and drinking, they accused him of being a glutton and drunkard. Now, when I hear people say that drinking is a sin, especially Christians, I have news for them, the Good News, the Word, or our Lord, however you wish to put it, was both sin free and He drank. Yes, I have had a beer, but that is not the point.
I have heard that hereabouts if it becomes known that one drinks, one might well be classified as a drunkard. And, in some cases, I think that may be true. Those who drink publicly here, do so against the social normals. And if they are willing to do so, they are very possibly out of control, if they come from here. Though, that may not be absolutely true, it has potential to be true. For those of us not of this area and culture, this may not be so true. As with many of the Christian belief systems, there is something against drink which I simply do not understand.
Further, Christ indicated that it is not what one consumes that makes one profane, but what one says. And, coming from the Jewish traditions (and if we still held to those) wine was not considered profane at all. As with anything, abuse or over use were and are considered minor sins, and it is believed they could lead to greater sins. As they said, they certainly knew and used terms such as drunkard and glutton.
Now, I have noticed that a drink or beer goes a long way hereabouts. Whether it is the heat, the lack of humidity, the altitude, some other factors, or a mix of any or all of that I cannot be sure. Three beers does me quite well, a shot of (or better, shot in a tumbler and on the rocks with cleaned water) of my keg strength good scotch will punch my ticket. And so I drink slowly and enjoy those fruits carefully. And, if it is considered in poor taste to drink here, then I will consume my alcohol more privately. Beyond being less expensive, drinking at home and alone or in small company is both less expensive and less risky in many ways.
I should add this though. Even if I do not agree with any ecumenical causation for ending the entertainment of my chosen libations, I will not say that for many, drinking might wisely be forsworn. For many, there is no self control with some things. And, these nectar can lead to worse things, both in actions and in other consumables. I would guess 70% of people may use these to enrich there lives, add a little excitement and pleasure, and be free of any excesses or destruction. But that leaves 30% who will lose their lives, parts of their lives, their freedoms in more ways than one, and totally wipe out on the stuff. So, if I were a gambling man at all, I would think it wise if never tried to never try. But I am not among those so I will continue, if with caution.
Tomorrow must be a busy day. I will try to rise earlier and get going, but I can make no promises here. I can only put my best foot forward when I am awake to do so, if I may too attempt to wake that foot early enough to do some day long works. I would reward myself should I do well, but this will have to be pro bono, for I am a poor lad, guy, old guy, whatever. Still, when I cannot reward (or bribe), a smile and congratulations along with the knowledge that I have done well has happily sufficed in the past. It even works for other people if they know you have nothing else to offer.
Off to bed, I do believe. If I can sleep now, I have a better chance at rising and doing my good deeds. This blog is excellent, sometimes. I forget what all is on my list frequently. If too, I have to slow down, turn on the machine, look around till I find it, then head out the door. How easy it is to forget one thing on even a minor list. So, here is my list again. I need to go grocery shopping, get fingerprinted, find out where I can post this apartment contract, call the VA and check on medicines and appointments, and do some more target practice with the .22 rifle.
I could also, if I have time and energy (and I might since it should be cool), take some things from here to the storage unit and bring a few things from the storage unit back to here (many more things to there than from there). Cleaning up the place, a bit, and doing some vacuuming now that it is working, might not be a bad plan either.
Well, do not look at me like that. It could happen. No, no really. :P *pftffft*
Good night, D.C. and Mrs. D.C.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
This that and something else.
.
.
I did not get to sleep until late (early). So I did not rise early, or at least not today. The world, here, has cooled. Unlike before where when they said it would rain and we would get 30 seconds of something akin to heavy (if cool) humidity droplets, we really got rain today, and pretty much off and on all day. It was great. It was not freezing cold either, as I had suspected it might be. It caught us, several times, while we were out shooting, though it rained several times before we left and has rained again since. That should shackle the dust for a bit and it just feels good on a number of levels. It is rain like this that makes me want to find a girl friend just to kiss her in the rain. The freshness of both seem to dance with the winds of mind, body, world, and all and quicken a soul back to the dew of youth. Kiss kiss...
Back to it. I am having little more luck getting the Henry on target than I did getting the other rifle on target. I am not sure what the problem is, exactly. I can, with some practice an such, get the rifle to hit about a 1 1/2" or less area, but I cannot get that area painted onto the bullseye. I aim with the front sight level with the rabbit-eared back sight, I try to put the front sight down and center in the rabbit-ear rear sight pocket, I do both of those free hand and using a sand bag, and... same thing, same area. I have tried to move the sights higher and lower, no go there either. And whether I aim a bit to the left or on target, I get the same. But, at 40 yards and more, I can hit remnants of shooting clays no bigger than a 50 cent piece or smaller every time I aim at them. *sigh* My neighbor suggested I get rid of the targets. Very funny. Plus, that is what I have to hit to qualify. Well, I suppose I will keep going out and practicing. I did note that, both from practicing and with the cooler temps, I am having far less trouble simply holding the rifle. Whether I need to or not, I would like to keep up practice after the practicum.
My neighbor did decide to shoot my pistol while I was busy. He used the faster rounds so he had to aim low. The pistol is simply not sighted in for high velocity rounds. Though it is still spot on side to side, how much front sight is in the picture depends upon distance, it becomes more art than science. I think he likes the thing. He was able to hit targets about the size of a playing card, laying on the ground though so with only a slim target to hit. His right eye cannot focus rightly, but his left eye works just fine. No recoil, either, with that pistol.
I have broken down and cleaned the pistol already. It is fast when you get it down and have all the tools on hand. It was not very dirty. The only reason it was so dirty before was that it had about 1,000 or more rounds through it since the last time it had been fully broken down. I have not cleaned the Henry, but I took a bore snake and cleaned it half way through my shooting. It neither helped nor hurt my target acquisition.
I had thought to stop at a fast food place, but decided since it is cool that I would bake a few pot pies. Chicken and beef tonight, plus a glass of milk. Humble and light fare, but it does just fine. I still need to go to the store, but like most bachelors (at least, perhaps single women do this too) I am stalling about a visit to the store. My neighbor said he will wait until Monday, so I suppose I will too. It is almost Monday anyway.
The medicine has become a normal thing. I think I still get, bodily, cranky from it from time to time, but only just slightly. No headaches occur now. I only take Tylenol once in a while if the cranky neck or shoulder last too long, but then only in a preventative manner in case that might go on to become painful or interrupt sleep. I do get fevers from time to time, but they are little things that usually pass rather quickly. I would think it is more akin to minor hot flashes than to even minor but fuller blown fevers. The rest of my medicine has still not arrived. Though I did find, in the mail room for the apartments, a note from the post office indicating that a package was sent to me but without an apartment number. I only saw it yesterday but it was dated the 14th of August (4 days after my doctor visit). The note had not been up until recently though. So I will call Monday and check on that. It was either that or an early birthday present that I did not receive.
Tomorrow I have to get busy on a number of things. I need to get the fingerprint work done, I need to go to the store, I have to find out where I can post this apartment lease, and I should check to make sure I have my appointments with the VA correct and about the medicine. I also need to get the rifle out and shoot some more. I think I will bring the target to half the distance and see if I can get some handle on what is going on with my shots. I have to get that down.. I am not sure if I would have to repay and do everything over again or if I would simply have to shoot again, but I do not want to find out. I am beginning to feel like a fool.
I should go watch those course videos again and take the notes I wanted.
Good night.
.
I did not get to sleep until late (early). So I did not rise early, or at least not today. The world, here, has cooled. Unlike before where when they said it would rain and we would get 30 seconds of something akin to heavy (if cool) humidity droplets, we really got rain today, and pretty much off and on all day. It was great. It was not freezing cold either, as I had suspected it might be. It caught us, several times, while we were out shooting, though it rained several times before we left and has rained again since. That should shackle the dust for a bit and it just feels good on a number of levels. It is rain like this that makes me want to find a girl friend just to kiss her in the rain. The freshness of both seem to dance with the winds of mind, body, world, and all and quicken a soul back to the dew of youth. Kiss kiss...
Back to it. I am having little more luck getting the Henry on target than I did getting the other rifle on target. I am not sure what the problem is, exactly. I can, with some practice an such, get the rifle to hit about a 1 1/2" or less area, but I cannot get that area painted onto the bullseye. I aim with the front sight level with the rabbit-eared back sight, I try to put the front sight down and center in the rabbit-ear rear sight pocket, I do both of those free hand and using a sand bag, and... same thing, same area. I have tried to move the sights higher and lower, no go there either. And whether I aim a bit to the left or on target, I get the same. But, at 40 yards and more, I can hit remnants of shooting clays no bigger than a 50 cent piece or smaller every time I aim at them. *sigh* My neighbor suggested I get rid of the targets. Very funny. Plus, that is what I have to hit to qualify. Well, I suppose I will keep going out and practicing. I did note that, both from practicing and with the cooler temps, I am having far less trouble simply holding the rifle. Whether I need to or not, I would like to keep up practice after the practicum.
My neighbor did decide to shoot my pistol while I was busy. He used the faster rounds so he had to aim low. The pistol is simply not sighted in for high velocity rounds. Though it is still spot on side to side, how much front sight is in the picture depends upon distance, it becomes more art than science. I think he likes the thing. He was able to hit targets about the size of a playing card, laying on the ground though so with only a slim target to hit. His right eye cannot focus rightly, but his left eye works just fine. No recoil, either, with that pistol.
I have broken down and cleaned the pistol already. It is fast when you get it down and have all the tools on hand. It was not very dirty. The only reason it was so dirty before was that it had about 1,000 or more rounds through it since the last time it had been fully broken down. I have not cleaned the Henry, but I took a bore snake and cleaned it half way through my shooting. It neither helped nor hurt my target acquisition.
I had thought to stop at a fast food place, but decided since it is cool that I would bake a few pot pies. Chicken and beef tonight, plus a glass of milk. Humble and light fare, but it does just fine. I still need to go to the store, but like most bachelors (at least, perhaps single women do this too) I am stalling about a visit to the store. My neighbor said he will wait until Monday, so I suppose I will too. It is almost Monday anyway.
The medicine has become a normal thing. I think I still get, bodily, cranky from it from time to time, but only just slightly. No headaches occur now. I only take Tylenol once in a while if the cranky neck or shoulder last too long, but then only in a preventative manner in case that might go on to become painful or interrupt sleep. I do get fevers from time to time, but they are little things that usually pass rather quickly. I would think it is more akin to minor hot flashes than to even minor but fuller blown fevers. The rest of my medicine has still not arrived. Though I did find, in the mail room for the apartments, a note from the post office indicating that a package was sent to me but without an apartment number. I only saw it yesterday but it was dated the 14th of August (4 days after my doctor visit). The note had not been up until recently though. So I will call Monday and check on that. It was either that or an early birthday present that I did not receive.
Tomorrow I have to get busy on a number of things. I need to get the fingerprint work done, I need to go to the store, I have to find out where I can post this apartment lease, and I should check to make sure I have my appointments with the VA correct and about the medicine. I also need to get the rifle out and shoot some more. I think I will bring the target to half the distance and see if I can get some handle on what is going on with my shots. I have to get that down.. I am not sure if I would have to repay and do everything over again or if I would simply have to shoot again, but I do not want to find out. I am beginning to feel like a fool.
I should go watch those course videos again and take the notes I wanted.
Good night.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)