.
.
Something drastic. It is not on my end. Perhaps the food I am eating is having an effect, but I have rather cleanly been eating this way for years. It has happened suddenly, after two changes. First, I have my home locked from the inside while I am home, making breaking and entering more difficult. Secondly, I am sleeping on the floor, in ac... if only to 68º~71º.
I also, by happenstance, changed some things regarding the type and way I use sweetener. Same volume as before, same stuff, but new and different containers. So... maybe it was being poisoned, sugared. I simply can't rule that out. There are serious haters pretty much everywhere, on the left, right, religious, atheist, people are looking for targets, and singles are easy targets.
Hell, there are Catholics who would happily murder me for being against pedophilia and drug use and illegal immigration that goes with those and other evils, such as the destruction of state they pretend is a good. Not all Catholics are holy, or wish to be. It's just a means to earthly filthy ends. Most churches are pretty much living in darkness at this point. Some of my readers would murder me, if they only could, depending on the day.
It seems my blood pressure drops as blood sugar is dropping. The insulin, actually, drop, or the bp drop, can cause a massive exhaustive state to set in. What sent me to bed was a fast twenty point, systolic and diastolic, bp numbers, drops, probably triggered by the onset of an insulin purge. As I napped from 19:26 to my reading shortly after waking at 22:22, blood sugar collapsed from 184 to 86. That after dropping only a few points nearly an hour and an half after eating and dosing up to my 19:26 fall. Something is different. My body is figuring out how to get rid of lots of extra insulin fast. Now I have to relearn how to eat and dose. Probably eating a few more carbs. I thought this was a one time trick. Nope. Then again, if additives were going in without my knowledge... Yea.
Ah, bp 134/90 at a 79 pulse and an 86 blood sugar. Later.
Saturday, July 20, 2019
Better, definitely tired though.
.
.
I should be tired. Fair. Supper was the higher carb burger soup. I hadn't remembered it being very good, but that was late, full from other food, and not feeling well. It was good enough for tonight, and not bad. A larger dose of insulin, for both the food eaten and starting blood sugar. A check in an hour and quarter. If it is reasonable, a nap. If the reading is in the eighties, two tabs and a nap. Plus the glucometer goes with. I need a nap.
Actually, I will check now. I am starting to feel bad. Hmm. Hmm? BP is down to 118/81 at an 82 pulse. Blood sugar only dropped six points, to 182 in the last hour and quarter, having used nearly 30 cc's. Which, fine, I can sleep without worry. I will tinker with it only when I can stay awake. Crashing... later.
.
I should be tired. Fair. Supper was the higher carb burger soup. I hadn't remembered it being very good, but that was late, full from other food, and not feeling well. It was good enough for tonight, and not bad. A larger dose of insulin, for both the food eaten and starting blood sugar. A check in an hour and quarter. If it is reasonable, a nap. If the reading is in the eighties, two tabs and a nap. Plus the glucometer goes with. I need a nap.
Actually, I will check now. I am starting to feel bad. Hmm. Hmm? BP is down to 118/81 at an 82 pulse. Blood sugar only dropped six points, to 182 in the last hour and quarter, having used nearly 30 cc's. Which, fine, I can sleep without worry. I will tinker with it only when I can stay awake. Crashing... later.
Better.
.
.
Awake just before 15:00. Blood sugar is high, at 188 but high, this time, is fine. I can easily treat high. I have never seen blood sugar run away low like that. I have seen it slip, but not nearly untreatably tumble. I ended up eating two meals, drinking a quart of milk, and taking seven or nine carb tabs, one of which usually works. BP is 141/96 at a 74 pulse.
It's not the insulin, same stuff I have been using for a bit now. I am drinking a lot less. BP is acting up, possibly, on the side. Less fluid, far less sweetener, and less chance for that sweetener to be doped with real sugar. Difficult to know, but... something, things, have changed.
As mentioned, I am feeling better. I won't be out chasing records in track and field, competing in dwarf tossing, or such, but I am hoping to get a shower, shave eventually, eat food, and look about for a few things to do after I've had a chance to wake. I will hold off fasting until the end of the week. Obviously I wasn't ready. Later.
.
Awake just before 15:00. Blood sugar is high, at 188 but high, this time, is fine. I can easily treat high. I have never seen blood sugar run away low like that. I have seen it slip, but not nearly untreatably tumble. I ended up eating two meals, drinking a quart of milk, and taking seven or nine carb tabs, one of which usually works. BP is 141/96 at a 74 pulse.
It's not the insulin, same stuff I have been using for a bit now. I am drinking a lot less. BP is acting up, possibly, on the side. Less fluid, far less sweetener, and less chance for that sweetener to be doped with real sugar. Difficult to know, but... something, things, have changed.
As mentioned, I am feeling better. I won't be out chasing records in track and field, competing in dwarf tossing, or such, but I am hoping to get a shower, shave eventually, eat food, and look about for a few things to do after I've had a chance to wake. I will hold off fasting until the end of the week. Obviously I wasn't ready. Later.
Another hour.
.
.
BP is up. Better? It stopped collapsing. It is 130/84 with an 82pulse. Higher, but safe. Blood sugar is still problematic. I had it up to 166 an hour ago. It has dropped forty points to 126. I seem to be bleeding insulin. I... will stay up another hour. If it drops again, dump three tabs and go to bed. If it stays the same, two tabs. If it goes up ten, a single tab. I don't trust it. I could take tabs now, trying to get it to settle on it's own.
---------
Blood sugar went to 145. Technically I said I would do nothing. I don't trust it, so two tabs and sleep. Not worried about bp, just too late. Feeling better, save so tired. Good night.
.
BP is up. Better? It stopped collapsing. It is 130/84 with an 82pulse. Higher, but safe. Blood sugar is still problematic. I had it up to 166 an hour ago. It has dropped forty points to 126. I seem to be bleeding insulin. I... will stay up another hour. If it drops again, dump three tabs and go to bed. If it stays the same, two tabs. If it goes up ten, a single tab. I don't trust it. I could take tabs now, trying to get it to settle on it's own.
---------
Blood sugar went to 145. Technically I said I would do nothing. I don't trust it, so two tabs and sleep. Not worried about bp, just too late. Feeling better, save so tired. Good night.
Delays.
.
.
Because I can and because I am able, plus because I should, I stay up.
A duty of care to self is no less a duty, perhaps moreso when... the heart is amiss concerning the matter? I... think so.
Of course, I feel bad. As the cave cools ever so slightly there is easement. But the numbers, they keep dropping. An hour after getting blood sugar up to 112 it fell to 92. I believed I could eat by then, and obviously sensed a need. Green chili with beef and bean, and keto pita, plus a glass of milk. I can't handle more than a small bowl. I didn't check bp. There is nothing I can do about that anyway.
I will finish the milk, then check numbers in another hour. I want to see blood sugar satisfactory and stable for several hours in a row... three, two if really right. I just have no way of bumping bp. Still not sure if it is a cause, symptom, or both. I am pretty sure it has been both, both bp and insulin have been both.
Someone seemed to tease... mock. Definitely seemed a mocking. Then... seemed to take another pass, from a different angle. And, finally, pulled a video I didn't play before... it used to not be available to play. Just... resemblances. It must be someone who knows me. Thought I was younger? Now understands? Sometimes I look older. Sometimes not. Sometimes, I think, even my real age shows through this vessel. I was about to be peeved, until the last two popped. But whoever never uses my favored videos. Odd. Toying with me?
Here. See what I mean.
.
Because I can and because I am able, plus because I should, I stay up.
A duty of care to self is no less a duty, perhaps moreso when... the heart is amiss concerning the matter? I... think so.
Of course, I feel bad. As the cave cools ever so slightly there is easement. But the numbers, they keep dropping. An hour after getting blood sugar up to 112 it fell to 92. I believed I could eat by then, and obviously sensed a need. Green chili with beef and bean, and keto pita, plus a glass of milk. I can't handle more than a small bowl. I didn't check bp. There is nothing I can do about that anyway.
I will finish the milk, then check numbers in another hour. I want to see blood sugar satisfactory and stable for several hours in a row... three, two if really right. I just have no way of bumping bp. Still not sure if it is a cause, symptom, or both. I am pretty sure it has been both, both bp and insulin have been both.
Someone seemed to tease... mock. Definitely seemed a mocking. Then... seemed to take another pass, from a different angle. And, finally, pulled a video I didn't play before... it used to not be available to play. Just... resemblances. It must be someone who knows me. Thought I was younger? Now understands? Sometimes I look older. Sometimes not. Sometimes, I think, even my real age shows through this vessel. I was about to be peeved, until the last two popped. But whoever never uses my favored videos. Odd. Toying with me?
Here. See what I mean.
Friday, July 19, 2019
That's not good.
.
.
Right after dinner I started to feel bad. Tunnel vision, dilation problems, weakness... Stats.
I just ate two chicken thighs, a can of carrots with a tablespoon of butter, and a glass of milk. Along with it I took 10 cc's of insulin. In the half hour it took to finish, everything was going wrong. Blood sugar inexplicably dropped to 66 and blood pressure is down to 107/70 with an 83 pulse.
I popped a carb tab. Too full to eat more. If it keeps dropping or I don't feel better, another in an hour. Upstairs to cool off. But I don't dare sleep. If I begin nodding off too powerfully to stop, I will take another tab... or two. Would rather way too high than just enough too low. Ducks in first.
---------
An hour after the last read and two carb tabs total, blood sugar is at 112 but bp is 98/65 at an 82 pulse. Not good, but there is nothing else I can do for the night, including stay awake. Surprised I didn't crash, which is why I took two tabs without waiting, was falling. I will take the glucometer and bp machine upstairs. Not sure... why. The phone too, 911 may be required.
.
Right after dinner I started to feel bad. Tunnel vision, dilation problems, weakness... Stats.
I just ate two chicken thighs, a can of carrots with a tablespoon of butter, and a glass of milk. Along with it I took 10 cc's of insulin. In the half hour it took to finish, everything was going wrong. Blood sugar inexplicably dropped to 66 and blood pressure is down to 107/70 with an 83 pulse.
I popped a carb tab. Too full to eat more. If it keeps dropping or I don't feel better, another in an hour. Upstairs to cool off. But I don't dare sleep. If I begin nodding off too powerfully to stop, I will take another tab... or two. Would rather way too high than just enough too low. Ducks in first.
---------
An hour after the last read and two carb tabs total, blood sugar is at 112 but bp is 98/65 at an 82 pulse. Not good, but there is nothing else I can do for the night, including stay awake. Surprised I didn't crash, which is why I took two tabs without waiting, was falling. I will take the glucometer and bp machine upstairs. Not sure... why. The phone too, 911 may be required.
Fasting is delayed.
.
.
Blood sugar is not behaving. It was still at 138 after a fatted coffee and 26 cc's of insulin. With nothing else but plain tea on the side, only a quart the whole day. That won't work. I will just have a regular meal shortly, figure out blood sugar, and fast when that is regulated or able to be managed in a single dose. BP is 112/77 and 85 pulse?
Still feverish, but that might be from closing things up early, as well as trying something with how I control air flow. It is 77° in my area. After dinner I will retreat to the cool upstairs for a while, perhaps the night. I could see about getting the timer to work. I had it set, but it ran to and on after what I thought was the shut off. The thermostat controls indicated they weren't active, but the thermostat setting was set for lower. Perhaps that is an internal automatic logic system designed in that you just have to know, or typical stupid Chinese tech.
It got to about 90° out there, or the hottest I saw. Earlier in the day I could go out without being knocked for a loop. This low bp is causing problems. As the day passed, I had hoped to get to things. It got hotter, I shriveled inside of myself, and, here I sit. I lit the grill, will heat something, with veggies currently warming, add milk, do 8 cc's, perhaps watch something after a meal prayer, then go cool off.
Ugh. A shower first. Taking pretty good care of my teeth, two, often three, rarer four brushings and three gargles a day, with various formulations for each process from typical, easy, and nice to about as close to a belt sander and sand blaster as possible. Uhrm, I may be overdoing it. Damned if I do... even. It is down to 82°, unless the grill..? No, if it was upticking, it would be higher.
.
Blood sugar is not behaving. It was still at 138 after a fatted coffee and 26 cc's of insulin. With nothing else but plain tea on the side, only a quart the whole day. That won't work. I will just have a regular meal shortly, figure out blood sugar, and fast when that is regulated or able to be managed in a single dose. BP is 112/77 and 85 pulse?
Still feverish, but that might be from closing things up early, as well as trying something with how I control air flow. It is 77° in my area. After dinner I will retreat to the cool upstairs for a while, perhaps the night. I could see about getting the timer to work. I had it set, but it ran to and on after what I thought was the shut off. The thermostat controls indicated they weren't active, but the thermostat setting was set for lower. Perhaps that is an internal automatic logic system designed in that you just have to know, or typical stupid Chinese tech.
It got to about 90° out there, or the hottest I saw. Earlier in the day I could go out without being knocked for a loop. This low bp is causing problems. As the day passed, I had hoped to get to things. It got hotter, I shriveled inside of myself, and, here I sit. I lit the grill, will heat something, with veggies currently warming, add milk, do 8 cc's, perhaps watch something after a meal prayer, then go cool off.
Ugh. A shower first. Taking pretty good care of my teeth, two, often three, rarer four brushings and three gargles a day, with various formulations for each process from typical, easy, and nice to about as close to a belt sander and sand blaster as possible. Uhrm, I may be overdoing it. Damned if I do... even. It is down to 82°, unless the grill..? No, if it was upticking, it would be higher.
Waking a bit past noon.
.
.
Sleep must have been a doozie. Not by the title. That would have been reasonable, at least to have done once, but even all three times, if I had done it all three times, let alone once. Wought? And a fair question. Hold on, I just woke at a quarter to noon, and am shifting my own understandings.
Right. Anyway. I kept waking, then checking the time. All I could ever remember was that it always read ten to twenty five after lunch. Never could remember what the last time was supposed to have read, which makes sense now. Not a crazy thing if definitely an odd experience. Three times I dreamed I woke after noon. Imagine my confusion when that clock read 11:44 as I was actually out of bed. Or, am I? I ended checking it three times, then my other alarm, my wristwatch, the clock in the living room, the fast ones in the kitchens... I just wanted... an explanation, and definition of time. I felt so confused about it. All good finally, mostly. Odd how even little dreams can throw me. Rare, but surely.
BP right out is rather low, at 102/77 with an 87 pulse. The pulse is unusually high, especially for the bp, unless that is the new trade-off. Blood sugar was monstrous, at 178. I need to dose, so a fatted tea or coffee, plus 26 cc's. Then a check three hours after consumption. The fever remains. It is slight, sometimes normalizing, sometimes tipping int slight chills. Very odd numbers and symptoms. From floor sleeping, sun poisoning, something else? I just don't know.
.
Sleep must have been a doozie. Not by the title. That would have been reasonable, at least to have done once, but even all three times, if I had done it all three times, let alone once. Wought? And a fair question. Hold on, I just woke at a quarter to noon, and am shifting my own understandings.
Right. Anyway. I kept waking, then checking the time. All I could ever remember was that it always read ten to twenty five after lunch. Never could remember what the last time was supposed to have read, which makes sense now. Not a crazy thing if definitely an odd experience. Three times I dreamed I woke after noon. Imagine my confusion when that clock read 11:44 as I was actually out of bed. Or, am I? I ended checking it three times, then my other alarm, my wristwatch, the clock in the living room, the fast ones in the kitchens... I just wanted... an explanation, and definition of time. I felt so confused about it. All good finally, mostly. Odd how even little dreams can throw me. Rare, but surely.
BP right out is rather low, at 102/77 with an 87 pulse. The pulse is unusually high, especially for the bp, unless that is the new trade-off. Blood sugar was monstrous, at 178. I need to dose, so a fatted tea or coffee, plus 26 cc's. Then a check three hours after consumption. The fever remains. It is slight, sometimes normalizing, sometimes tipping int slight chills. Very odd numbers and symptoms. From floor sleeping, sun poisoning, something else? I just don't know.
Not feeling great.
.
.
I have definitely felt worse, even hours ago. Middling? Yeah, but that is like trying to split the difference between heaven and hell. It really doesn't work. The numbers look good. I had to eat a final bit, and take another dose, but it worked. BP is 118/86 pulse 88, unchanged. Blood sugar is 103. The bp is low, for me, but as nearly average as I have seen it in decades, mostly.
I am fevered, or sweating. It hasn't dropped but one degree all evening, starting at 21:00 to here at 2:15. I hope I turned on the other ac. Bleh. Nausea is mild, aches and pains are reasonable but there, fever or sweating isn't too tight, it's just not tops, or even well. I don't think life is supposed to be perpetually... wrong. If, as mentioned, I have had worse.
I keep dreaming to warn. Though I don't think it would matter. If I don't post it in time... it, trouble and death, are coming in a hurry. "Mother" enjoys her games. Odd who she chooses to target, but then Satan and minions like killing the lost, before they might repent. Crazy like a fox, sometimes.
Good night.
.
I have definitely felt worse, even hours ago. Middling? Yeah, but that is like trying to split the difference between heaven and hell. It really doesn't work. The numbers look good. I had to eat a final bit, and take another dose, but it worked. BP is 118/86 pulse 88, unchanged. Blood sugar is 103. The bp is low, for me, but as nearly average as I have seen it in decades, mostly.
I am fevered, or sweating. It hasn't dropped but one degree all evening, starting at 21:00 to here at 2:15. I hope I turned on the other ac. Bleh. Nausea is mild, aches and pains are reasonable but there, fever or sweating isn't too tight, it's just not tops, or even well. I don't think life is supposed to be perpetually... wrong. If, as mentioned, I have had worse.
I keep dreaming to warn. Though I don't think it would matter. If I don't post it in time... it, trouble and death, are coming in a hurry. "Mother" enjoys her games. Odd who she chooses to target, but then Satan and minions like killing the lost, before they might repent. Crazy like a fox, sometimes.
Good night.
Thursday, July 18, 2019
The bad was returning.
.
.
That falling feeling. It wasn't blood sugar. Something similar just not the same. Blood pressure? At 109/82 and a 90 pulse, I think that is it. While that, currently, is an okay bp, it is a bit low, for me it is very low. Any lower and it will become a problem. The questions, now, are why the severe dips? Are they the cause or a symptom? How to work with or solve the problem. This is as bad as blood sugar drops. Or nearly. But I can fix those.
Checking blood sugar, at 129 that isn't a part of the problem. This is only an half an hour after the last of dinner and insulin, so that is a higher read than it should be, but not an unreasonable one considering the 133 start. Just... checking. From now on, I need to check everything when there is a problem. Hmm, I should bring out the ear thermometer for when I feel fevered or chilled, just to know.
The lawn is being watered. Unless I misread the outdoor thermometer, it was 68° by 21:00. So I opened everything up as I set water going. It sure felt a lot cooler outside than in. With everything open it hasn't dropped a degree in here. Crazy. Some nights it works quickly, some nights not so much. Some nights it doesn't work at all. I should start the secondary ac upstairs. Another several hours of watering, though only using a single line and sprinkler. Then bed? If possible.
At least I have something to work with, if no good leads as to whether it is cause or affect. Perhaps a call to primary care tomorrow. I think the nurses who do the nightsquad are, well, fully quad squad qualified and racially mean it. They don't want them anywhere near living patients, even their own. Later.
.
That falling feeling. It wasn't blood sugar. Something similar just not the same. Blood pressure? At 109/82 and a 90 pulse, I think that is it. While that, currently, is an okay bp, it is a bit low, for me it is very low. Any lower and it will become a problem. The questions, now, are why the severe dips? Are they the cause or a symptom? How to work with or solve the problem. This is as bad as blood sugar drops. Or nearly. But I can fix those.
Checking blood sugar, at 129 that isn't a part of the problem. This is only an half an hour after the last of dinner and insulin, so that is a higher read than it should be, but not an unreasonable one considering the 133 start. Just... checking. From now on, I need to check everything when there is a problem. Hmm, I should bring out the ear thermometer for when I feel fevered or chilled, just to know.
The lawn is being watered. Unless I misread the outdoor thermometer, it was 68° by 21:00. So I opened everything up as I set water going. It sure felt a lot cooler outside than in. With everything open it hasn't dropped a degree in here. Crazy. Some nights it works quickly, some nights not so much. Some nights it doesn't work at all. I should start the secondary ac upstairs. Another several hours of watering, though only using a single line and sprinkler. Then bed? If possible.
At least I have something to work with, if no good leads as to whether it is cause or affect. Perhaps a call to primary care tomorrow. I think the nurses who do the nightsquad are, well, fully quad squad qualified and racially mean it. They don't want them anywhere near living patients, even their own. Later.
Still pretty rotten.
.
.
A feverishness remains. If you have ever been in a jungle, where you don't have access to ac so you are always a bit too hot, it is more like that. It took a while for the muscle use heat to fade, another hour or two. But it did. It is 76° in here, 88° outside, not going upstairs to check. I only have one ac running currently, and it is on saver mode. At twenty hundred I will turn both on, at bedtime I'll turn the saver one off. Every other night and day, the other one will get a break.
I need to set up a desk and day couch up there. In time, perhaps a dvd player, and small tv, for my science and math vids... start attempting to create more regular class like times/days. My day schedule failed, again, and quickly. But health took a dump. It doesn't perfectly count. Plus, I was still able to break through to do things in the morning through serious sickness, physical stress, and lack of sleep some recent mornings. All of it almost miraculous, compared with my history. I am not close to giving up on failures of very minor sorts given how catastrophic they would usually be.
I am going with an 18:00 meal, thus a fasting day tomorrow. A few pieces of chicken, a fatted drink, more milk, a veggie if available, and some unsweetened canned fruit with whipped cream. In batches, over two to three hours. I am eating smaller amounts. Attempting to concentrate flavor while reducing calories. Almost getting back to hauteur cuisine, save excluding added or... unnatural... carbohydrates. It takes so few rich fats to fill, and remain full. Unlike carb based foods, like Chines or Mexican foods which create slaves... not really for the production of food, but to the food. And it creates a weakness in the people. India doesn't want great innovators, less so doers. Feed them plants. No fats, few proteins, crushes the will. Pot works too.
Feeling ever so slightly better. Not going to work. A shower, tending the animals, trying not to break more of a sweat let alone tear back into a fever. A shower before long. Maybe reading upstairs in the relative cool... not too much, I fear the fevered chills too. Bleh. At least I can manage my illness... as much as it can be managed, solo.
Best light the grill. I like reheating on the grill. Oh, 4 cc's of insulin to boot. Hmm, to see if there is a veggie to heat with? Beats, I'll bet. Make it 6 cc's if so. Later.
.
A feverishness remains. If you have ever been in a jungle, where you don't have access to ac so you are always a bit too hot, it is more like that. It took a while for the muscle use heat to fade, another hour or two. But it did. It is 76° in here, 88° outside, not going upstairs to check. I only have one ac running currently, and it is on saver mode. At twenty hundred I will turn both on, at bedtime I'll turn the saver one off. Every other night and day, the other one will get a break.
I need to set up a desk and day couch up there. In time, perhaps a dvd player, and small tv, for my science and math vids... start attempting to create more regular class like times/days. My day schedule failed, again, and quickly. But health took a dump. It doesn't perfectly count. Plus, I was still able to break through to do things in the morning through serious sickness, physical stress, and lack of sleep some recent mornings. All of it almost miraculous, compared with my history. I am not close to giving up on failures of very minor sorts given how catastrophic they would usually be.
I am going with an 18:00 meal, thus a fasting day tomorrow. A few pieces of chicken, a fatted drink, more milk, a veggie if available, and some unsweetened canned fruit with whipped cream. In batches, over two to three hours. I am eating smaller amounts. Attempting to concentrate flavor while reducing calories. Almost getting back to hauteur cuisine, save excluding added or... unnatural... carbohydrates. It takes so few rich fats to fill, and remain full. Unlike carb based foods, like Chines or Mexican foods which create slaves... not really for the production of food, but to the food. And it creates a weakness in the people. India doesn't want great innovators, less so doers. Feed them plants. No fats, few proteins, crushes the will. Pot works too.
Feeling ever so slightly better. Not going to work. A shower, tending the animals, trying not to break more of a sweat let alone tear back into a fever. A shower before long. Maybe reading upstairs in the relative cool... not too much, I fear the fevered chills too. Bleh. At least I can manage my illness... as much as it can be managed, solo.
Best light the grill. I like reheating on the grill. Oh, 4 cc's of insulin to boot. Hmm, to see if there is a veggie to heat with? Beats, I'll bet. Make it 6 cc's if so. Later.
Better, after many hours of sleep.
.
.
I did wake, if a bit roughly, around 7:30. Just to close up the downstairs. I may have fed the girls. I keep thinking of going to once a day plus dry with them, but then they become... weird with food. Actually, though, they are still weird with food, just not, quite, as ferociously.
I was in such pain that it was back to bed. Blood sugar was 133 then, is 132 as I actually wake now. I thought I was waking for the day, so did a reading at 7:30. BP, as I wake, is better, at 129/89 with a pulse of 94. The pulse is still off. The bp is good(er) but a bit lower than usual. After a bit of work with a milder light and the bathroom mirror, I was able to get dilation last night. Dilation was a bit clunky, but it worked.
Poison to be sure. For some of us, those who have been dead before? Those of dark parentage? The sun can really hits us. It gets easier through the summer, but each year that passes, for me, that first large exposure gets worse. Toss that in with sleeping on the hard floor, and you get what you get.
I had slept from 18:00 to 21:00, then was up to a quarter after midnight. Then slept until 7:30 until about 8:00. Finally waking at 13:30. Sleep, itself, is wonderful. Going to bed, getting down to the floor, isn't bad. Getting up is still a challenge. Using those muscles ignites an internal burn. I am still sweating almost an hour later. Want to prove you have what it takes? Just for a challenge, vow to sleep on the floor until you can do it without difficulty, but at least a month.
Use sleeping mats, a rug, bundles of blankets, I'd even spot you a minor mattress (baby). I'll bet, even if you have a bad back, you will end up in far better shape. No worries, most just want a pill or to be left alone in their misery. Actually suffering through to health is too much to ask, which is why doctors have given up on us, and why I have to force their hands! Gah!
Dinner isn't until... 16:00 tonight, 18:00? I'll figure it out. If the latter, tonight is the last late night meal. If so... while not ready for a three day fast, a single day fast might work? That way I would fast, pretty much, weekly. That wouldn't be a bad thing at all. Intentions? The return of vitality to the church. Would require removal of a few scabs, and allowance of gangrenous discharges. Doable. Been done before. Either that or accepting end times. God's will, not mine, if we each play our part for which we will be judged. Amen.
.
I did wake, if a bit roughly, around 7:30. Just to close up the downstairs. I may have fed the girls. I keep thinking of going to once a day plus dry with them, but then they become... weird with food. Actually, though, they are still weird with food, just not, quite, as ferociously.
I was in such pain that it was back to bed. Blood sugar was 133 then, is 132 as I actually wake now. I thought I was waking for the day, so did a reading at 7:30. BP, as I wake, is better, at 129/89 with a pulse of 94. The pulse is still off. The bp is good(er) but a bit lower than usual. After a bit of work with a milder light and the bathroom mirror, I was able to get dilation last night. Dilation was a bit clunky, but it worked.
Poison to be sure. For some of us, those who have been dead before? Those of dark parentage? The sun can really hits us. It gets easier through the summer, but each year that passes, for me, that first large exposure gets worse. Toss that in with sleeping on the hard floor, and you get what you get.
I had slept from 18:00 to 21:00, then was up to a quarter after midnight. Then slept until 7:30 until about 8:00. Finally waking at 13:30. Sleep, itself, is wonderful. Going to bed, getting down to the floor, isn't bad. Getting up is still a challenge. Using those muscles ignites an internal burn. I am still sweating almost an hour later. Want to prove you have what it takes? Just for a challenge, vow to sleep on the floor until you can do it without difficulty, but at least a month.
Use sleeping mats, a rug, bundles of blankets, I'd even spot you a minor mattress (baby). I'll bet, even if you have a bad back, you will end up in far better shape. No worries, most just want a pill or to be left alone in their misery. Actually suffering through to health is too much to ask, which is why doctors have given up on us, and why I have to force their hands! Gah!
Dinner isn't until... 16:00 tonight, 18:00? I'll figure it out. If the latter, tonight is the last late night meal. If so... while not ready for a three day fast, a single day fast might work? That way I would fast, pretty much, weekly. That wouldn't be a bad thing at all. Intentions? The return of vitality to the church. Would require removal of a few scabs, and allowance of gangrenous discharges. Doable. Been done before. Either that or accepting end times. God's will, not mine, if we each play our part for which we will be judged. Amen.
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
Hmm, that is strange.
.
.
I finally got around to brushing my teeth. It isn't just mild tunnel vision. My eyes are not able to dilate. I could see myself, but not well. Couldn't focus. I don't know, but that seems really bad. It has been this way for days now. Oxygen deprived too, or it sure feels like it. Poisoned.
There are simply too many disparate symptoms for it to be natural. Ten to one no autopsy will be done should I die. Definitely no legitimate autopsy. Lungs are failing, breathing is too difficult, not enough oxygen. Couldn't be just from sleeping on the floor. I may call down, see if there is a triage nurse on call. There is no way I could drive down, can't see right.
...
Call 911, I was told. Will they get me to the V.A.? No. I can't afford an emergency room visit, and the V.A. never pays. I can't drive, both exhaustion and vision issues. Tough, I guess. Not much to do else. She is putting in for my doc tomorrow. A consult. But if things haven't improved, I'll need to get a ride. BP is very low, at 90/70 but the pulse was 102.
Will see tomorrow. Time to shut the water off and hit it.
.
I finally got around to brushing my teeth. It isn't just mild tunnel vision. My eyes are not able to dilate. I could see myself, but not well. Couldn't focus. I don't know, but that seems really bad. It has been this way for days now. Oxygen deprived too, or it sure feels like it. Poisoned.
There are simply too many disparate symptoms for it to be natural. Ten to one no autopsy will be done should I die. Definitely no legitimate autopsy. Lungs are failing, breathing is too difficult, not enough oxygen. Couldn't be just from sleeping on the floor. I may call down, see if there is a triage nurse on call. There is no way I could drive down, can't see right.
...
Call 911, I was told. Will they get me to the V.A.? No. I can't afford an emergency room visit, and the V.A. never pays. I can't drive, both exhaustion and vision issues. Tough, I guess. Not much to do else. She is putting in for my doc tomorrow. A consult. But if things haven't improved, I'll need to get a ride. BP is very low, at 90/70 but the pulse was 102.
Will see tomorrow. Time to shut the water off and hit it.
A perfect start to a sleep.
.
.
I was hoping to wake, at least to check my blood. As well, I didn't brush my teeth, ick, or put the chicken away. And that is mighty fine chicken. Right at 21:00, probably just a few minutes before as it took a while to sort head from ass, figure out how to sit, find light, then check the time. Not bad given a partial sleep and all.
My first priority was checking blood sugar. I had some fear I had exceeded dosage. At 100 I couldn't have hoped for better. Perfect. A concern managed. Then I had to decide whether I could wake, do a few things. Actually that took care of itself. While my mind was debating, my body just did it.
Since I will be up just a bit, I first set the water going, for the lawn. The front east lawn isn't looking all that good, but it feels wonderful on bare feet! I don't get it. I will run up front for a while, then hit the back. Which also isn't looking better, if it seems to be doing better.
Then I opened the house. At 19:00 it was 80° , at 21:00 it is 65°, if I remember correctly. Inside it is 75 main, 78 front, and 70°/69° Upstairs. The area, the southeast corner where I lay my head, is where it is usually 69°. The other area is above the window at my feet, through which the power saver ac unit is installed... it greatly varies, if that matters.
I left the milk out, and with blood sugar good, I am consuming that. The girls will be fed shortly, though I left them reasonably meaty remains of the chicken. Oh, I put the chicken up, bagged nicely. I hate dropping everything and dropping, but it was brutal. I was done and failing so fast.
Even now, these problems make the few things I did exhausting. There is no way I could replicate the efforts. The only way watering might be done is because everything is set up, so just flipping a few crossovers will do it. Assuming I can stay awake, and I don't. But maybe. I will at least have to turn it off.
My vision is still closed in, about half of my full field is available to me. That doesn't make perfect sense unless getting up from the floor is an extreme stress. It sort of feels like it is, the muscle aches you get from extended constipation, from pushing, to exhaustion, but without the constipation. Even the binding as muscles and else cross, knot, twist. I think that is just from getting up. Hopefully, soon, that will... normalize.
.
I was hoping to wake, at least to check my blood. As well, I didn't brush my teeth, ick, or put the chicken away. And that is mighty fine chicken. Right at 21:00, probably just a few minutes before as it took a while to sort head from ass, figure out how to sit, find light, then check the time. Not bad given a partial sleep and all.
My first priority was checking blood sugar. I had some fear I had exceeded dosage. At 100 I couldn't have hoped for better. Perfect. A concern managed. Then I had to decide whether I could wake, do a few things. Actually that took care of itself. While my mind was debating, my body just did it.
Since I will be up just a bit, I first set the water going, for the lawn. The front east lawn isn't looking all that good, but it feels wonderful on bare feet! I don't get it. I will run up front for a while, then hit the back. Which also isn't looking better, if it seems to be doing better.
Then I opened the house. At 19:00 it was 80° , at 21:00 it is 65°, if I remember correctly. Inside it is 75 main, 78 front, and 70°/69° Upstairs. The area, the southeast corner where I lay my head, is where it is usually 69°. The other area is above the window at my feet, through which the power saver ac unit is installed... it greatly varies, if that matters.
I left the milk out, and with blood sugar good, I am consuming that. The girls will be fed shortly, though I left them reasonably meaty remains of the chicken. Oh, I put the chicken up, bagged nicely. I hate dropping everything and dropping, but it was brutal. I was done and failing so fast.
Even now, these problems make the few things I did exhausting. There is no way I could replicate the efforts. The only way watering might be done is because everything is set up, so just flipping a few crossovers will do it. Assuming I can stay awake, and I don't. But maybe. I will at least have to turn it off.
My vision is still closed in, about half of my full field is available to me. That doesn't make perfect sense unless getting up from the floor is an extreme stress. It sort of feels like it is, the muscle aches you get from extended constipation, from pushing, to exhaustion, but without the constipation. Even the binding as muscles and else cross, knot, twist. I think that is just from getting up. Hopefully, soon, that will... normalize.
Bedtime will be early.
.
.
I am staying up to do a two, then three hour blood sugar check. I took a larger dose, thinking supper would be larger. The corn might counter that almost on it's own. Otherwise I could only eat a thigh and an half and a glass of milk. I was so sure I would eat more. The body just can't.
I am so exhausted just from making super, vision is narrowing again. It had expanded to two thirds my field of view, but has been cut to half, and may be shrinking still. I... will not make it to the three hour mark. I don't think the two hour mark is possible. I will take the glucometer, and a box of carb tabs, up with me. I will probably wake well enough to check it sometime, and my ability to sense an insulin drop should kick in. If not, I guess I get to die! - No such luck.
I'll put the chicken up. It was tasty. Don't wish to waste. Brush the teeth, put the ducks up, and feed the cats. Ugh. Freezing fever is returning. I best get blanketed. Good night.
.
I am staying up to do a two, then three hour blood sugar check. I took a larger dose, thinking supper would be larger. The corn might counter that almost on it's own. Otherwise I could only eat a thigh and an half and a glass of milk. I was so sure I would eat more. The body just can't.
I am so exhausted just from making super, vision is narrowing again. It had expanded to two thirds my field of view, but has been cut to half, and may be shrinking still. I... will not make it to the three hour mark. I don't think the two hour mark is possible. I will take the glucometer, and a box of carb tabs, up with me. I will probably wake well enough to check it sometime, and my ability to sense an insulin drop should kick in. If not, I guess I get to die! - No such luck.
I'll put the chicken up. It was tasty. Don't wish to waste. Brush the teeth, put the ducks up, and feed the cats. Ugh. Freezing fever is returning. I best get blanketed. Good night.
Fevered yet.
.
.
In the background, on a back burner. As long as I am not too active it should be good. I want to be somewhat into life, or I will get the chills. It is a precarious balance. Chicken is finally going. I lost track. I'll have to watch it carefully, as hot as it hot. Hmm, I never set the tea either. I am so very sick. I hope food will help. I 'll add corn with supper. The second to the last bag of Iowa corn my mother sent. Still amazingly fresh.
So stuck in illness. Will be for a while. I need to get out , but not in the heat. Too sleepy at night, perhaps in the morning? If possible. It wouldn't have worked this morning. Beef, cabbage, lettuce, some pork, more chicken, but... small. I am beset for at least the next two months. As is, all "discretionary spending" will only be on food, and even there it will be the most meat to the mile. Chia seems expensive, until you realize two tablespoons is a full meal. A two pound bag lasts months. As an example.
I can't believe I am so sick, and that there isn't a thing to be done for it bug gobs of aspirin, rest, staying cool and down, and the passage of time. Literally sun poisoning.
I pulled the chicken early. Or the outside would have burned. It was already rather crispy. With residual heat, sitting in the cold oven while corn finishes, it should cook off. I just hope the skin stays crispy. Essentially, a fat based faux potato chip! Love it or hate it. I'll gladly cover for haters. Blood sugar is 178? I... can fix that. Later.
.
In the background, on a back burner. As long as I am not too active it should be good. I want to be somewhat into life, or I will get the chills. It is a precarious balance. Chicken is finally going. I lost track. I'll have to watch it carefully, as hot as it hot. Hmm, I never set the tea either. I am so very sick. I hope food will help. I 'll add corn with supper. The second to the last bag of Iowa corn my mother sent. Still amazingly fresh.
So stuck in illness. Will be for a while. I need to get out , but not in the heat. Too sleepy at night, perhaps in the morning? If possible. It wouldn't have worked this morning. Beef, cabbage, lettuce, some pork, more chicken, but... small. I am beset for at least the next two months. As is, all "discretionary spending" will only be on food, and even there it will be the most meat to the mile. Chia seems expensive, until you realize two tablespoons is a full meal. A two pound bag lasts months. As an example.
I can't believe I am so sick, and that there isn't a thing to be done for it bug gobs of aspirin, rest, staying cool and down, and the passage of time. Literally sun poisoning.
I pulled the chicken early. Or the outside would have burned. It was already rather crispy. With residual heat, sitting in the cold oven while corn finishes, it should cook off. I just hope the skin stays crispy. Essentially, a fat based faux potato chip! Love it or hate it. I'll gladly cover for haters. Blood sugar is 178? I... can fix that. Later.
So horrible.
.
.
The pain, agony, from burning skin, the midsection, the fever, and else. I just couldn't cool down, was heating up the downstairs in my terrible feverishness. A handful of aspirin and back to bed. At 8:30 I fell, at 15:30 I woke, in a seemingly much more fit state. It is still 74° down here, as it was when I crashed. But it feels cool, not like a furnace.
I think a minor portion of the problem was pickle and olives on an empty stomach. I don't mind that, but should follow it with a fatted drink or glass of milk to cut the sour brine. It did break the locked fevered dry throat. Breakfast is near, soaking chicken thighs in salt and herbs. Should set the fresh tea to go. And, yea.
The sleep was needed. I more passed out from so much suffering, but the sleep and the cool relaxed the poisons. There are still bits, that without care could become inflamed. But care is being tendered. I am moving slowly if at all. It is a rough one, but I think I can get through without too much more pain.
Ever work yourself to total exhaustion? Where you nearly hit black out? Seeing stars, lungs crisped, muscles tight and burning? Then you took your downtime. Later that day your lungs still hurt, but not as bad. The stars had backed off from pin-point tunnel vision, but only to a third of normal, and your flesh was a smoldering ruin, just waiting to repair, rest, recover, but knew it would take days? Yea, that is me, now. Tough as that sounds it is into the pan, out of the fire, compared to the crash.
Weeeeee! Are we having fun yet?!? *grins*
Chicken might not be splendid, but grilled it is better. I will skip hot flecks, but might add a color of smoked paprika. That, a fatted tea, perhaps two cups of milk as well. Later, a can of wild caught sardines and... something something... a few mozzarella sticks? Something. Time to start the grill. Later.
.
The pain, agony, from burning skin, the midsection, the fever, and else. I just couldn't cool down, was heating up the downstairs in my terrible feverishness. A handful of aspirin and back to bed. At 8:30 I fell, at 15:30 I woke, in a seemingly much more fit state. It is still 74° down here, as it was when I crashed. But it feels cool, not like a furnace.
I think a minor portion of the problem was pickle and olives on an empty stomach. I don't mind that, but should follow it with a fatted drink or glass of milk to cut the sour brine. It did break the locked fevered dry throat. Breakfast is near, soaking chicken thighs in salt and herbs. Should set the fresh tea to go. And, yea.
The sleep was needed. I more passed out from so much suffering, but the sleep and the cool relaxed the poisons. There are still bits, that without care could become inflamed. But care is being tendered. I am moving slowly if at all. It is a rough one, but I think I can get through without too much more pain.
Ever work yourself to total exhaustion? Where you nearly hit black out? Seeing stars, lungs crisped, muscles tight and burning? Then you took your downtime. Later that day your lungs still hurt, but not as bad. The stars had backed off from pin-point tunnel vision, but only to a third of normal, and your flesh was a smoldering ruin, just waiting to repair, rest, recover, but knew it would take days? Yea, that is me, now. Tough as that sounds it is into the pan, out of the fire, compared to the crash.
Weeeeee! Are we having fun yet?!? *grins*
Chicken might not be splendid, but grilled it is better. I will skip hot flecks, but might add a color of smoked paprika. That, a fatted tea, perhaps two cups of milk as well. Later, a can of wild caught sardines and... something something... a few mozzarella sticks? Something. Time to start the grill. Later.
Awake, early.
.
.
I dragged out at 6:30 to close up shop before it got too hot. A bit amazed I could get up then, with the rough night. After closing all down, I climbed back down to bed. Sleeping on the floor, by the way, is brutal on the torso. Especially since I can't currently do shoulder flap assists without literally risking skin. I won't even try until the burn is well and truly gone. A week, two? Yeah, I absolutely toasted shoulders and arms. It just looks brown, but it is making me feverish and nauseated, plus the constant surface burning. If you are going to do it, do it full throttle.
Oh, and anytime I exert myself, like getting up off the floor with my torso so currently abused? So that I heat up? Instant fever until my body can relax and cool. On the good side, this is a heck of a workout for Toofat Bison. It'll tickle some muscles and add a robust nature, if it doesn't kill me. It is seriously testing my cardio vascular system. I have to fight for air when first going down and often after getting up.
I woke without the alarm, just the sun, if getting up was a lot of work, activated things. It is 72° and I am still burning up an half hour after getting up. Took the t-shirt off attempting to cool faster. Bleh. Blood sugar is 144 fasting, but I had a pickle and olives last night. I won't eat until sixteen hundred tonight. I am heading to fasting before I am ready. So? So I just let it roll around the clock again, as often as necessary. I don't want to fast until around the end of next week. I may have two more meal days before overhanding the program. This doesn't need to be difficult.
Ugh. Aspirin with medicine again, for the fever and aches. Later.
.
I dragged out at 6:30 to close up shop before it got too hot. A bit amazed I could get up then, with the rough night. After closing all down, I climbed back down to bed. Sleeping on the floor, by the way, is brutal on the torso. Especially since I can't currently do shoulder flap assists without literally risking skin. I won't even try until the burn is well and truly gone. A week, two? Yeah, I absolutely toasted shoulders and arms. It just looks brown, but it is making me feverish and nauseated, plus the constant surface burning. If you are going to do it, do it full throttle.
Oh, and anytime I exert myself, like getting up off the floor with my torso so currently abused? So that I heat up? Instant fever until my body can relax and cool. On the good side, this is a heck of a workout for Toofat Bison. It'll tickle some muscles and add a robust nature, if it doesn't kill me. It is seriously testing my cardio vascular system. I have to fight for air when first going down and often after getting up.
I woke without the alarm, just the sun, if getting up was a lot of work, activated things. It is 72° and I am still burning up an half hour after getting up. Took the t-shirt off attempting to cool faster. Bleh. Blood sugar is 144 fasting, but I had a pickle and olives last night. I won't eat until sixteen hundred tonight. I am heading to fasting before I am ready. So? So I just let it roll around the clock again, as often as necessary. I don't want to fast until around the end of next week. I may have two more meal days before overhanding the program. This doesn't need to be difficult.
Ugh. Aspirin with medicine again, for the fever and aches. Later.
Double troubles.
.
.
Fevered chills. My limbs were icy, the rest fevered. The sunburn is surfacing. Making me quite ill. Had to turn off the ac, then it got too warm. I turned it all back on, but it was too hot to stay down. Still really sick. And, as the burns surface, I have to be careful. As I attempted a friction hoist myself out of bed, using my shoulder and upper arm, I felt skin giving way. I could have slaked off a five by ten hunk of skin, into something like road rash. Gently, carefully, I found a way down and out.
The fever made me so thirsty. Pickles, pickle juice, and olives, to break the grale in my fevered throat. It worked, mostly. The throat is still slightly fevered, as is the body. And achy. Perhaps more aspirin? Even my eyelids are beset by fever. It's rough, as there is still a minor war between the frigid extremities and the burning core. The heat, which crowns my brow, is the one which needs the most care. It is like being on fire on the inside.
Burn... Perhaps it has cooled enough upstairs. Good night, I hope. Dreams, of terrible things, in the flames.
.
Fevered chills. My limbs were icy, the rest fevered. The sunburn is surfacing. Making me quite ill. Had to turn off the ac, then it got too warm. I turned it all back on, but it was too hot to stay down. Still really sick. And, as the burns surface, I have to be careful. As I attempted a friction hoist myself out of bed, using my shoulder and upper arm, I felt skin giving way. I could have slaked off a five by ten hunk of skin, into something like road rash. Gently, carefully, I found a way down and out.
The fever made me so thirsty. Pickles, pickle juice, and olives, to break the grale in my fevered throat. It worked, mostly. The throat is still slightly fevered, as is the body. And achy. Perhaps more aspirin? Even my eyelids are beset by fever. It's rough, as there is still a minor war between the frigid extremities and the burning core. The heat, which crowns my brow, is the one which needs the most care. It is like being on fire on the inside.
Burn... Perhaps it has cooled enough upstairs. Good night, I hope. Dreams, of terrible things, in the flames.
Tuesday, July 16, 2019
Feeling bad.
.
.
In part the heat, in part work recently, in part the fight, plus the migraine attempts... perhaps enough time has passed for more aspirin? Yea, either way. Blood sugar is 126 but I am done with food and insulin. Not sure if it is the heat or migraine, or both, but I am done with anything, or is that everything?
Mostly. At 19:30 I put the ducks away, with fresh water and a short shower. They love that. I am watering the front actual grassy area. Not sure there is anything but a sort of weed on the other front half. Now that I am watering, perhaps I should plant seed? It might just be too hot. One of the other areas planted is doing well, a few other spots are weak to middling, two are failures.
It was 84° outside, 76° in the main (stone and mortar part), 79° in the front and 68°/69° upstairs. Yea, the upstairs has no effect on the downstairs, during the day. At night it does. I will shut one of them of tonight. If that is easily satisfactory, I will try shutting the other off tomorrow night, just running with a fan. Then I begin practicing with how long it takes to cool the upstairs. Perhaps going in hot, for a nap or sleep, is enough... starting them, on timers. I'm looking at economy but not falling down on reasonable comfort. If you want to genocide the ill, then do it, honestly. Don't torture us to death.
A few hours of watering, then I am packing it in. If I feel this bad tomorrow, I will begin sorting. Perhaps more cool breaks upstairs. Reading and praying, sorting and clearing up there, a return to the non-digital. Perhaps back to studying... Latin, calculus, German, differential equations, chemistry, French, algebra to geometry, and probably some common engineering subjects. There is much to... remember. I have aced some of those courses, without a curve. Perhaps a few subjects a few hours a week, some were four to five hours a week, the non-eng were one to two hours weekly. Just remember, homework takes two to four times class hours... so a single five hour per week course (eng level diffy q, calculus, and calculus based chemistry are 20~25 hours a week). Yeah, I loved when they pushed 16~18 'hour' eng weeks... 80 hours or more. Bleh. Know your math, well and functionally, and you have three quarters of it. Until Latin, German, French, Russian, or Italian... "...kick em' while they're up, kick em' when they're down... repeat ad nauseam".
Hmm? Later. Or good night.
.
In part the heat, in part work recently, in part the fight, plus the migraine attempts... perhaps enough time has passed for more aspirin? Yea, either way. Blood sugar is 126 but I am done with food and insulin. Not sure if it is the heat or migraine, or both, but I am done with anything, or is that everything?
Mostly. At 19:30 I put the ducks away, with fresh water and a short shower. They love that. I am watering the front actual grassy area. Not sure there is anything but a sort of weed on the other front half. Now that I am watering, perhaps I should plant seed? It might just be too hot. One of the other areas planted is doing well, a few other spots are weak to middling, two are failures.
It was 84° outside, 76° in the main (stone and mortar part), 79° in the front and 68°/69° upstairs. Yea, the upstairs has no effect on the downstairs, during the day. At night it does. I will shut one of them of tonight. If that is easily satisfactory, I will try shutting the other off tomorrow night, just running with a fan. Then I begin practicing with how long it takes to cool the upstairs. Perhaps going in hot, for a nap or sleep, is enough... starting them, on timers. I'm looking at economy but not falling down on reasonable comfort. If you want to genocide the ill, then do it, honestly. Don't torture us to death.
A few hours of watering, then I am packing it in. If I feel this bad tomorrow, I will begin sorting. Perhaps more cool breaks upstairs. Reading and praying, sorting and clearing up there, a return to the non-digital. Perhaps back to studying... Latin, calculus, German, differential equations, chemistry, French, algebra to geometry, and probably some common engineering subjects. There is much to... remember. I have aced some of those courses, without a curve. Perhaps a few subjects a few hours a week, some were four to five hours a week, the non-eng were one to two hours weekly. Just remember, homework takes two to four times class hours... so a single five hour per week course (eng level diffy q, calculus, and calculus based chemistry are 20~25 hours a week). Yeah, I loved when they pushed 16~18 'hour' eng weeks... 80 hours or more. Bleh. Know your math, well and functionally, and you have three quarters of it. Until Latin, German, French, Russian, or Italian... "...kick em' while they're up, kick em' when they're down... repeat ad nauseam".
Hmm? Later. Or good night.
What a fight!
.
.
I have been trying to post that last post for hours. Blogspot kept suggesting something was wrong. I get that a lot. I think it is usually a skipped Internet connection, just for a second, as it tries to auto-save. Usually just clicking the tab ends it. But that wasn't working this time. First I checked internet connection. Check.
I was wondering if they were going deeper into censorship, or for some of us. I would click the tab, hit the publish tab, and the problem tab would reappear. No explanation. I tried this way, then that, trying all sorts of creative ways to blindside the system. I have had to go around blogger and youtube so often, I... have learned a few things. Nope.
Finally, blogspot started shutting me out of their site, even other blogs became inaccessible. For longer each attempt. Twice it even disconnected the internet. Once literally, the next time through software. Blinking lights tell the story, versus steady. I had to think.
Could it be word count? I erased some, tried again. That is when I got a software timeout. Thankfully it didn't crash the system, so what I had written, and stored, mostly, in flash memory, was still there. It's all I have on this device. Anyway, when I was able to get back, I saw that some of what I was trying to post had been kept. It was letter count, I just needed to erase more.
Crap, you would think they could tell you the problem. I have never heard of a letter/word count limit. New, or just my longest post? Migraine almost returned. Ugh.
.
I have been trying to post that last post for hours. Blogspot kept suggesting something was wrong. I get that a lot. I think it is usually a skipped Internet connection, just for a second, as it tries to auto-save. Usually just clicking the tab ends it. But that wasn't working this time. First I checked internet connection. Check.
I was wondering if they were going deeper into censorship, or for some of us. I would click the tab, hit the publish tab, and the problem tab would reappear. No explanation. I tried this way, then that, trying all sorts of creative ways to blindside the system. I have had to go around blogger and youtube so often, I... have learned a few things. Nope.
Finally, blogspot started shutting me out of their site, even other blogs became inaccessible. For longer each attempt. Twice it even disconnected the internet. Once literally, the next time through software. Blinking lights tell the story, versus steady. I had to think.
Could it be word count? I erased some, tried again. That is when I got a software timeout. Thankfully it didn't crash the system, so what I had written, and stored, mostly, in flash memory, was still there. It's all I have on this device. Anyway, when I was able to get back, I saw that some of what I was trying to post had been kept. It was letter count, I just needed to erase more.
Crap, you would think they could tell you the problem. I have never heard of a letter/word count limit. New, or just my longest post? Migraine almost returned. Ugh.
A perfect nap.
.
.
I went down at about 10:30. I couldn't stay awake. I fed the cats and ducks, moved the lawn chairs, and some other things but couldn't break the want, perhaps need, for extra sleep. I set the alarm for three hours, as an emergency backup. I woke every thirty to forty minutes, thinking I had overslept. Ended sleeping an hour and forty, less than a typical nap. If you love sleep when you are exhausted, like I do, feeling like you got six hours of shuteye in less than two real hours was awesome.
The upstairs is staying around 69°, the downstairs main and front are at 75° but feel much cooler, and outside is about 87°. I have to guess that the outside will create strict limits on how cool the upstairs can get. On 100° days, who knows what the limits can be, 73°, 75°, but it will be moving cooler air. Though, who knows. Perhaps with two ac's, 69° is easy. As is, one of the, a "smart" one, cycles off for an half hour to hour or more, so... there is room to cool more.
Late for breakfast, but chia and a fatted coffee are in the works. I had thought to not check blood sugar. As, at 99 fasting, still fasting, it usually stays the same. Except, I remembered, when the average falls below 150. It read 154 just now. So, yes, a 10 cc dose with breakfast. Keto and intermittent fasting might not be exciting, or sexy. And it sure isn't taking weight off, but it is taking size off. I am back up to 280 but wearing the 38 belt from 260, losing the 38 cargo shorts... that didn't happen until I was down to 250. But it is helping control blood sugar.
On to lunch and resting. Tomorrow? Finish the dishes, actually finish raking first, then dishes. Perhaps clearing and cleaning the bathroom. And maybe figuring out the closet upstairs, and installing some of the cage shelving, so I can have clothes up there. That may help sort my downstairs bedroom... keep winter clothes there, summer clothes upstairs? Seems like a plan. There is no hanging bar up there, but that is an easy fix.
Oh, why not sleep in the closet? It started out by being because I was too tired to think. I just took an easy space, set up, and plopfactured a sleep zone. It... then made me curious, if daybreak might help wake more regularly. First shot? No! Not in the face. Vampires simply don't tolerate that at all. I knew this. Now 34% better! However, the second ac unit is beyond my feet, to the north. And that curtain has to be open for airflow. And, yes, that will do, nicely!
It may take time, but I... have hope. That it woke me today was amazing. I will have to get to bed earlier if I want to not have migraines, one of which is encroaching. Aspirin, now! Yes, I might be able to pattern to the day. Then, in the winter, use a day light on a timer. I haven't been doing great with a day schedule, but not bad and this brings hope. Although, I have to admit, if I can get back to school, it won't be electrical engineering.
That is all but a glorified white collar job, without the pay or job security that it once offered to make up for the difficulty of the program. At ~$35k start? Probably five to seven years before being dumped, unless working for peanuts? Perhaps some sort of engineering... if possible, but not that one. Biomech? Aeronautical? Hell, maybe chemistry? Something real. Physics has gone junk theory, and anything soft is not only indoctrination, foolish, it is filled with unqualified idiots.
But, first, I need to do days... or even nights, but regularity. I won't go through the horror of missing classes and study time. Which also means I need to be in better physical condition. Crawling out of the grave is a bitch, might not even be possible. But getting a taste of life... so tantalizing... like feeling the first woman's nipple, then her wet. Fuck yea. Get. It. Up. Later.
.
I went down at about 10:30. I couldn't stay awake. I fed the cats and ducks, moved the lawn chairs, and some other things but couldn't break the want, perhaps need, for extra sleep. I set the alarm for three hours, as an emergency backup. I woke every thirty to forty minutes, thinking I had overslept. Ended sleeping an hour and forty, less than a typical nap. If you love sleep when you are exhausted, like I do, feeling like you got six hours of shuteye in less than two real hours was awesome.
The upstairs is staying around 69°, the downstairs main and front are at 75° but feel much cooler, and outside is about 87°. I have to guess that the outside will create strict limits on how cool the upstairs can get. On 100° days, who knows what the limits can be, 73°, 75°, but it will be moving cooler air. Though, who knows. Perhaps with two ac's, 69° is easy. As is, one of the, a "smart" one, cycles off for an half hour to hour or more, so... there is room to cool more.
Late for breakfast, but chia and a fatted coffee are in the works. I had thought to not check blood sugar. As, at 99 fasting, still fasting, it usually stays the same. Except, I remembered, when the average falls below 150. It read 154 just now. So, yes, a 10 cc dose with breakfast. Keto and intermittent fasting might not be exciting, or sexy. And it sure isn't taking weight off, but it is taking size off. I am back up to 280 but wearing the 38 belt from 260, losing the 38 cargo shorts... that didn't happen until I was down to 250. But it is helping control blood sugar.
On to lunch and resting. Tomorrow? Finish the dishes, actually finish raking first, then dishes. Perhaps clearing and cleaning the bathroom. And maybe figuring out the closet upstairs, and installing some of the cage shelving, so I can have clothes up there. That may help sort my downstairs bedroom... keep winter clothes there, summer clothes upstairs? Seems like a plan. There is no hanging bar up there, but that is an easy fix.
Oh, why not sleep in the closet? It started out by being because I was too tired to think. I just took an easy space, set up, and plopfactured a sleep zone. It... then made me curious, if daybreak might help wake more regularly. First shot? No! Not in the face. Vampires simply don't tolerate that at all. I knew this. Now 34% better! However, the second ac unit is beyond my feet, to the north. And that curtain has to be open for airflow. And, yes, that will do, nicely!
It may take time, but I... have hope. That it woke me today was amazing. I will have to get to bed earlier if I want to not have migraines, one of which is encroaching. Aspirin, now! Yes, I might be able to pattern to the day. Then, in the winter, use a day light on a timer. I haven't been doing great with a day schedule, but not bad and this brings hope. Although, I have to admit, if I can get back to school, it won't be electrical engineering.
That is all but a glorified white collar job, without the pay or job security that it once offered to make up for the difficulty of the program. At ~$35k start? Probably five to seven years before being dumped, unless working for peanuts? Perhaps some sort of engineering... if possible, but not that one. Biomech? Aeronautical? Hell, maybe chemistry? Something real. Physics has gone junk theory, and anything soft is not only indoctrination, foolish, it is filled with unqualified idiots.
But, first, I need to do days... or even nights, but regularity. I won't go through the horror of missing classes and study time. Which also means I need to be in better physical condition. Crawling out of the grave is a bitch, might not even be possible. But getting a taste of life... so tantalizing... like feeling the first woman's nipple, then her wet. Fuck yea. Get. It. Up. Later.
Oh what a night.
.
.
I didn't go down until pretty late, babysitting the blood sugar drop. Though heat wasn't helping. Whatever all happened, it was cool enough to sleep. Cold actually. I found another blanket and still ended up needing a quilt, if I couldn't shake sleep enough until shutting the house up this morning.
The readings upstairs were 68°/69° depending where. Downstairs it got to 70°, and at 7:30 when I buttoned things up, the outdoor temp was down to 58°. I have to think if not the low, that was close to it, as at about midnight it was 60°. At 8:20, the downstairs is up to 72°, while the upstairs remains 68°/69°.
I didn't think I would wake this early. Especially with the cool, assuming the extra ac worked. Well, and sleeping on the floor. I am amazed how well sleeping on the floor is working out. There are a few kinks to work out, but nothing drastic. It is already better than that lumpy mattress, if it is a bit dated. I had the alarm set for 8:30 and 9:30, just in hopes of closing windows. As mentioned, windows were closed at 7:30 and I was up at 8:20. I may have to nap in a bit, but...
.
I didn't go down until pretty late, babysitting the blood sugar drop. Though heat wasn't helping. Whatever all happened, it was cool enough to sleep. Cold actually. I found another blanket and still ended up needing a quilt, if I couldn't shake sleep enough until shutting the house up this morning.
The readings upstairs were 68°/69° depending where. Downstairs it got to 70°, and at 7:30 when I buttoned things up, the outdoor temp was down to 58°. I have to think if not the low, that was close to it, as at about midnight it was 60°. At 8:20, the downstairs is up to 72°, while the upstairs remains 68°/69°.
I didn't think I would wake this early. Especially with the cool, assuming the extra ac worked. Well, and sleeping on the floor. I am amazed how well sleeping on the floor is working out. There are a few kinks to work out, but nothing drastic. It is already better than that lumpy mattress, if it is a bit dated. I had the alarm set for 8:30 and 9:30, just in hopes of closing windows. As mentioned, windows were closed at 7:30 and I was up at 8:20. I may have to nap in a bit, but...
Monday, July 15, 2019
Watering and resting.
.
.
An attempt at resting. Too hot, even with all efforts. Still too hot. Hopefully I'll figure out a cooler, more restful, day tomorrow. I did figure out how to get the upstairs down to 73° by midafternoon. Closing the vent wasn't enough. I filled the cavity with plastic. Perhaps it will be cooler through the day, without leaking, seemingly uselessly, down into the main of the house.
The front and back lawn were watered as soon as the sun went down enough. Watering while shining would burn more than it already is. There is some greening. It is rough out there. I am considering building shade out there. Just one 20 by 20 foot section, and just from the midafternoon sun. A seven foot fence, for some distance. Angled with solar and earthly rotations, so less than 20 feet should be needed. The rest of the lawn is back, and grass, greening. That one area is brown and other than grass. Affordability? Perhaps if I could obtain old pallets?
By 19:30 it was 65° or so. I had real hopes it would cool more. Here at a quarter to eleven it is still just 65°. All fans going, and it isn't cooling at all in here. It feels a bit cooler, it just isn't measurable. ... While considering all, I thought to measure the spare ac and upstairs windows. It, doesn't fit, with the fins on. I took those off. Even then I had to muscle it in. But, finally, I may have enough cooling horsepower to create a comfort zone! No promises, but there is more hope.
Blood sugar has been up and down. Actually, it wasn't for heat or ac or watering that I am still up. Blood sugar has been wobbling. A heat issue? Less consumption? I have been measuring no eyeballing things. Actually I think I had been cutting myself short with cream. Anyway, my last reading was 79. While I don't have warning signs, I didn't want to just let it go. One more check... then a shower and to bed, if it works. If it is still dropping, a carb dose.
And??? 66! Dropping a tab and waiting another hour. Only one minor dose, I thought. Hmm, no worries. Both ac's are running. Should be nice when I finally get up there. Cool enough, I will turn one off and put the other on a timer. Later.
.
An attempt at resting. Too hot, even with all efforts. Still too hot. Hopefully I'll figure out a cooler, more restful, day tomorrow. I did figure out how to get the upstairs down to 73° by midafternoon. Closing the vent wasn't enough. I filled the cavity with plastic. Perhaps it will be cooler through the day, without leaking, seemingly uselessly, down into the main of the house.
The front and back lawn were watered as soon as the sun went down enough. Watering while shining would burn more than it already is. There is some greening. It is rough out there. I am considering building shade out there. Just one 20 by 20 foot section, and just from the midafternoon sun. A seven foot fence, for some distance. Angled with solar and earthly rotations, so less than 20 feet should be needed. The rest of the lawn is back, and grass, greening. That one area is brown and other than grass. Affordability? Perhaps if I could obtain old pallets?
By 19:30 it was 65° or so. I had real hopes it would cool more. Here at a quarter to eleven it is still just 65°. All fans going, and it isn't cooling at all in here. It feels a bit cooler, it just isn't measurable. ... While considering all, I thought to measure the spare ac and upstairs windows. It, doesn't fit, with the fins on. I took those off. Even then I had to muscle it in. But, finally, I may have enough cooling horsepower to create a comfort zone! No promises, but there is more hope.
Blood sugar has been up and down. Actually, it wasn't for heat or ac or watering that I am still up. Blood sugar has been wobbling. A heat issue? Less consumption? I have been measuring no eyeballing things. Actually I think I had been cutting myself short with cream. Anyway, my last reading was 79. While I don't have warning signs, I didn't want to just let it go. One more check... then a shower and to bed, if it works. If it is still dropping, a carb dose.
And??? 66! Dropping a tab and waiting another hour. Only one minor dose, I thought. Hmm, no worries. Both ac's are running. Should be nice when I finally get up there. Cool enough, I will turn one off and put the other on a timer. Later.
So very hot.
.
.
Even with the ac going upstairs, everything buttoned down, fans going, it is still getting too hot. I will measure the other ac, but I think it was too big for any available window. I don't quite get it. Curtains alone had been working. I'll check, maybe something was left open. It doesn't make sense. At 17:30 it is down to 86°, as if it matters in here.
Blood sugar dropped to 96, so I had a tuna melt on keto friendly flatbread. Will see how it turns out in a nearly two hours. Since I didn't plan to work, the shower is open. I may hit that, then take another before bedtime. It is burning up in here. Upstairs is a bit cooler, but not much.
A check around the place and windows, curtains, and doors are all closed, save the ac window curtains upstairs are open enough to let air pass. I may see about mocking up a system to keep the curtains closed and still allow air flow. What was done is a start. Apparently not the end. And my tolerance of heat still has serious limits.
What I really need is central air, but that isn't possible without my ssd income returning. A lump sum would see to that and a new furnace... the one I have is, was when I moved in, thirty seven years old. So, yeah. Of course, in high summer, getting hvac work... I could only get quotes and timetable quotes and hope for fall but expect more like spring as an installation rough date. Last I heard, about $5k for the both, probably more like $7k or $8k now.
Later.
.
Even with the ac going upstairs, everything buttoned down, fans going, it is still getting too hot. I will measure the other ac, but I think it was too big for any available window. I don't quite get it. Curtains alone had been working. I'll check, maybe something was left open. It doesn't make sense. At 17:30 it is down to 86°, as if it matters in here.
Blood sugar dropped to 96, so I had a tuna melt on keto friendly flatbread. Will see how it turns out in a nearly two hours. Since I didn't plan to work, the shower is open. I may hit that, then take another before bedtime. It is burning up in here. Upstairs is a bit cooler, but not much.
A check around the place and windows, curtains, and doors are all closed, save the ac window curtains upstairs are open enough to let air pass. I may see about mocking up a system to keep the curtains closed and still allow air flow. What was done is a start. Apparently not the end. And my tolerance of heat still has serious limits.
What I really need is central air, but that isn't possible without my ssd income returning. A lump sum would see to that and a new furnace... the one I have is, was when I moved in, thirty seven years old. So, yeah. Of course, in high summer, getting hvac work... I could only get quotes and timetable quotes and hope for fall but expect more like spring as an installation rough date. Last I heard, about $5k for the both, probably more like $7k or $8k now.
Later.
Noon thirty, up and starting.
.
.
It doesn't get cold. But at 72° while sleeping, I had to find a blanket, right at 4:44. With the outside only getting to 68° from what I saw, there isn't much more cooling going to happen with a single ac in... 2,400 square feet, or so, house. Still, that was enough. Downstairs it is already up to 74° front and back, 88° outdoors.
As my first sleep on the floor, I was expecting a lot of aches and pains this morning. As is, I can't sort out what might be derived from that and what is derived from excess work. Or just work. Learning to stand, while asleep... or even when awake, will be a bit of a trick. I definitely roll more often. I slept well, only waking in order to find a blanket. I had one up there, just didn't want or need it at first, so couldn't dig through exhaustion to get it ready. It worked.
I couldn't wake until 9:40, to close the cave down. The 8:30 alarm had completely been used up and another half hour had rolled by. That was a total blur of a memory. The house had probably already started heating, but there was nothing I could do. It was as good as I could do.
Blood sugar is 141 fasting, so a dose with food, perhaps eight or ten cc's. Breakfast shortly. A few eggs and salsa, chia and flax, and a fatted tea. If I need, for a dose later, or just really need, another fatted drink. If not, that is the food plan for the day. No work, either. A shower, tending critters, relaxing. I have pushed too hard for two long. Later.
.
It doesn't get cold. But at 72° while sleeping, I had to find a blanket, right at 4:44. With the outside only getting to 68° from what I saw, there isn't much more cooling going to happen with a single ac in... 2,400 square feet, or so, house. Still, that was enough. Downstairs it is already up to 74° front and back, 88° outdoors.
As my first sleep on the floor, I was expecting a lot of aches and pains this morning. As is, I can't sort out what might be derived from that and what is derived from excess work. Or just work. Learning to stand, while asleep... or even when awake, will be a bit of a trick. I definitely roll more often. I slept well, only waking in order to find a blanket. I had one up there, just didn't want or need it at first, so couldn't dig through exhaustion to get it ready. It worked.
I couldn't wake until 9:40, to close the cave down. The 8:30 alarm had completely been used up and another half hour had rolled by. That was a total blur of a memory. The house had probably already started heating, but there was nothing I could do. It was as good as I could do.
Blood sugar is 141 fasting, so a dose with food, perhaps eight or ten cc's. Breakfast shortly. A few eggs and salsa, chia and flax, and a fatted tea. If I need, for a dose later, or just really need, another fatted drink. If not, that is the food plan for the day. No work, either. A shower, tending critters, relaxing. I have pushed too hard for two long. Later.
Absolutely exhausted, but done.
.
.
The bed is made, my bedside kit is set up, a shower taken. It isn't cooling very quickly up there. Or down here. Not good. I will close the vent, it doesn't seem to help. It might help once the upstairs is cool, while I am downstairs? I'll... figure things out. I am hoping one ac will be enough up there. Maybe not. But I don't need expensive ac's for upstairs. Just the cheap baby small size.
Absolutely done in. I hope it has cooled some up there, but can't count on it. I will move the fan to where it could help. I sure hope it works. I can't afford another ac this month, maybe next. And nothing else that might work fits. I think. I will do measurements tomorrow.
I haven't missed medicine, even had to reset that Saturday. I've been doing exceptionally well. But... I am coming undone. The final blood sugar is 97. Good night.
.
The bed is made, my bedside kit is set up, a shower taken. It isn't cooling very quickly up there. Or down here. Not good. I will close the vent, it doesn't seem to help. It might help once the upstairs is cool, while I am downstairs? I'll... figure things out. I am hoping one ac will be enough up there. Maybe not. But I don't need expensive ac's for upstairs. Just the cheap baby small size.
Absolutely done in. I hope it has cooled some up there, but can't count on it. I will move the fan to where it could help. I sure hope it works. I can't afford another ac this month, maybe next. And nothing else that might work fits. I think. I will do measurements tomorrow.
I haven't missed medicine, even had to reset that Saturday. I've been doing exceptionally well. But... I am coming undone. The final blood sugar is 97. Good night.
Sunday, July 14, 2019
Yea? Yea.
.
.
Fried, cooked, almost done. Yes.
The last curtains are up. AC is up, an extension cord policed and set. Now to rest a bit. I would love to shower, but I want to cool a bit, then set up the bedding upstairs, first. Yes, ac is on, as is a fan. And the downstairs is open. I will have to figure out whether to open the downstairs with ac running upstairs, with the floor vent open, or... lots of variables.
A break, then a floor bed including the alarm, lights, a few other items... edc for a right man's bedside. Then another break if need be. Finally a shower and to bed. With short hair it doesn't take long to dry. Oh, no. I won't be setting an alarm. There is no way I could wake to it. I am in trouble. A few cool days down, then back to work.
Blood sugar surprised me. Two and an half hours after dinner, it was up to 126. I was worried that it would keep going up. An hour further on, it is 106. I can't complain. Tomorrow... one can only hope. I'll keep at it. Breakfast is at noon, if I can wake by then. Hmm, could leave an eastern curtain partly open, see if natural light might help wake me. Oh, may set the alarm for nine, if nothing else in order to close the joint before heat invades.
Oh, heck. Not a bad week. Not perfect. Had to push a bit hard. Got a bit done.
.
Fried, cooked, almost done. Yes.
The last curtains are up. AC is up, an extension cord policed and set. Now to rest a bit. I would love to shower, but I want to cool a bit, then set up the bedding upstairs, first. Yes, ac is on, as is a fan. And the downstairs is open. I will have to figure out whether to open the downstairs with ac running upstairs, with the floor vent open, or... lots of variables.
A break, then a floor bed including the alarm, lights, a few other items... edc for a right man's bedside. Then another break if need be. Finally a shower and to bed. With short hair it doesn't take long to dry. Oh, no. I won't be setting an alarm. There is no way I could wake to it. I am in trouble. A few cool days down, then back to work.
Blood sugar surprised me. Two and an half hours after dinner, it was up to 126. I was worried that it would keep going up. An hour further on, it is 106. I can't complain. Tomorrow... one can only hope. I'll keep at it. Breakfast is at noon, if I can wake by then. Hmm, could leave an eastern curtain partly open, see if natural light might help wake me. Oh, may set the alarm for nine, if nothing else in order to close the joint before heat invades.
Oh, heck. Not a bad week. Not perfect. Had to push a bit hard. Got a bit done.
Quite good.
.
.
While the grill was starting, then being adjusted, two of the windows were finished, mostly. Sheers weren't put up, but the rods for those and the curtains were installed, and the curtains were put up. As well, I set up for the last set of curtains to go up. Then it was time to cook.
Chops, grilled. As they were finishing, eggs fried and corn heated. Perfect, if too much. Two chops is as much as I could eat. I will save the extra. A glass of milk with else. That heated me up. Oddly, it has already started cooling in here, down a degree or two. Hot food, a bit of work, and cooking just change the perception.
At 106 blood sugar was sat. I expect it to go up enough to need to be remediated. Fine in any case. It isn't about my will, it is simply biomechanical forces which are fed then managed beyond that. Getting personal or emotional, while natural, in wrestling some things, must be set aside as soon as possible. Business.
I will need a bit of a break. Cold tea, time to cool, time to digest. I believe I will finish the curtains tonight, get the ac up and in, set up a bed, and then shower. Or so it is hoped. Oh, it feels like upstairs is just as cool... or warm... as downstairs. Therefore I highly suspect curtains all around up there will add at least a few degrees of cooling. Using blackout curtains on top of it.
I don't think I will get to dishes today. Not enough trash to bother with, all of it packaging, so... If I can gather it, I will. Otherwise tomorrow, or when next possible. Ugh. So tired. I was fine until I heated up. I'll cool as possible, then start in. It is 82° outside, at 19:30. Bleh. Later.
.
While the grill was starting, then being adjusted, two of the windows were finished, mostly. Sheers weren't put up, but the rods for those and the curtains were installed, and the curtains were put up. As well, I set up for the last set of curtains to go up. Then it was time to cook.
Chops, grilled. As they were finishing, eggs fried and corn heated. Perfect, if too much. Two chops is as much as I could eat. I will save the extra. A glass of milk with else. That heated me up. Oddly, it has already started cooling in here, down a degree or two. Hot food, a bit of work, and cooking just change the perception.
At 106 blood sugar was sat. I expect it to go up enough to need to be remediated. Fine in any case. It isn't about my will, it is simply biomechanical forces which are fed then managed beyond that. Getting personal or emotional, while natural, in wrestling some things, must be set aside as soon as possible. Business.
I will need a bit of a break. Cold tea, time to cool, time to digest. I believe I will finish the curtains tonight, get the ac up and in, set up a bed, and then shower. Or so it is hoped. Oh, it feels like upstairs is just as cool... or warm... as downstairs. Therefore I highly suspect curtains all around up there will add at least a few degrees of cooling. Using blackout curtains on top of it.
I don't think I will get to dishes today. Not enough trash to bother with, all of it packaging, so... If I can gather it, I will. Otherwise tomorrow, or when next possible. Ugh. So tired. I was fine until I heated up. I'll cool as possible, then start in. It is 82° outside, at 19:30. Bleh. Later.
A reasonable day.
.
.
No work, yet. It will happen. It is just about to happen. Breakfast was eaten, fatted coffee and chia. I will have chia a bit more often so as to add bulk. In a bit, I will grill a few chops and have eggs on the side, plus a small fatted tea. I will be hitting the upstairs, curtains to start as the grill heats. At least I now know how to install brackets. It just takes time.
After lunch, I will just continue with the upstairs. It is 76° in the main house, not sure about upstairs, nearly 79° in the front rooms. It actually feels cool. As soon as work commences, that is going to change. It is 92° outside, as I lit the grill. Actually not a bad heat, a steady breeze and dry day improves things.
Blood sugar is 106 after breakfast and a 4 cc dose. I won't take anything with supper or onward, unless it hits 150 or higher later, then a small fatted tea and a 10 cc dose.
My brother called. He is still in Vegas, visiting family. Wanted to talk about our mom's car situation. He told me what he was offering, asked if I could pitch in. I told him what I offered. He doesn't think she can do a manual, either. I not only think she could, I think it would be good for her. They are going to, unwisely, ignore me. She is going to buy another hunk of junk and have to struggle with it the whole time. *shrug*
I'll get on to work, then lunch. Later.
.
No work, yet. It will happen. It is just about to happen. Breakfast was eaten, fatted coffee and chia. I will have chia a bit more often so as to add bulk. In a bit, I will grill a few chops and have eggs on the side, plus a small fatted tea. I will be hitting the upstairs, curtains to start as the grill heats. At least I now know how to install brackets. It just takes time.
After lunch, I will just continue with the upstairs. It is 76° in the main house, not sure about upstairs, nearly 79° in the front rooms. It actually feels cool. As soon as work commences, that is going to change. It is 92° outside, as I lit the grill. Actually not a bad heat, a steady breeze and dry day improves things.
Blood sugar is 106 after breakfast and a 4 cc dose. I won't take anything with supper or onward, unless it hits 150 or higher later, then a small fatted tea and a 10 cc dose.
My brother called. He is still in Vegas, visiting family. Wanted to talk about our mom's car situation. He told me what he was offering, asked if I could pitch in. I told him what I offered. He doesn't think she can do a manual, either. I not only think she could, I think it would be good for her. They are going to, unwisely, ignore me. She is going to buy another hunk of junk and have to struggle with it the whole time. *shrug*
I'll get on to work, then lunch. Later.
Alarms worked for a while.
.
.
They did get me up to close the cave down before it got hot outside. Around 8:40. I couldn't stay awake. Back to bed until noon. Memory of waking earlier is weak. I have been working too hard. It, mostly, worked for almost a week. Don't worry children, I will keep trying. The cycle will begin spinning for a while. As soon as I can regain a regular pattern again, I will try the alarms again. I seek a regular sleep pattern, have since becoming ill.
The ducks are out. No food in the hutch offers them incentives. I do put water in with them. I have worked on getting them out, food seems to be the trick. Having cold tea, making fresh tea. One advantage to oversleeping is it handles my alternating intermittent fasting interval. I can eat as I wake. Today should have been ten, it is noon.
I will try to eat at noon again tomorrow. It isn't optimal, but fasting too soon is less optimal. A surprise was that work went fairly well while fasting. That was an improvement over fasting before. I was able to work leading up to, then through the three full days of fasting. Actually, even the day after.
Fasting blood sugar is 126. Oh well. The weekly, biweekly, and monthly averages are 114, 126, and 128. With between four and five samples a day. I will, with breakfast, use about 3 cc's of insulin. If I don't dose, it will get higher, then stay high for fasting. I will sort this out. The number this morning is not acceptable, but I can't fast every day and I am already intermittent fasting strongly and watching what and how much I am eating. So... minor doses, with food.
I won't shower first thing. A few hours waking, and breakfast. Then on to curtains, installing an ac or two, and then setting up a floor nest. If I have worked up a sweat, I may turn an ac on, take a shower, then go crash for a bit. If so, I may set the last of the dishes up before going down, in order to finish them when I wake.
With a cooler place to sleep, or even nap, I should be able to keep more of a work schedule. And, sleeping in the spare bedroom, as my resistance to the cold has diminished and that is a warmer room, should help me figure out more work in the winter. My body is changing as my vitals come under control. I still have to sort things out. I don't know what it all means. I can only work on things as they become apparent to me. It has been decades since... then again medicines can be as bad as the diseases... I'm just not, now, dealing with both, just, mostly, medicinal side effects.
Hmm? Later.
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