.
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Yeah, okay, I slept a lot and I slept very late. I am not worried about how much sleep I get, so long as it is enough, until the medicine picks me back up. I have been doing little, but at least I understand there is a real reason for it. Not that I have surrendered, if I see a window I take it. But when your body is only getting a fifth of the blood it needs, expecting normal function is purely illogical. I see myself more as a manager of function than a lazy bum. I only have minimal gear, I don't have the full suite of kit for life. I have to make due, and I do when able.
It seems clouds have rolled in. The sun is hidden. It is cooler today. I don't know if I will get to anything, but I am hoping to do some things. I need to get laundry done, and I think I will. If I could tie doing dishes with laundry I would be good. I have also set up adding Rid-X to my phone and calender, so that on a monthly basis that goes down the drain. As I get more functional I am hoping to add more tasks, cleaning tasks, to a weekly or bi-weekly alarmed schedule. I think I can get to more, but not always. I am definitely hoping that riding the bike, not initially but in time, will allow me to do even more. I need stamina. Stamina will go straight to using an unlikely strength I retain. Compare me to any man crippled as long as I have been, or even an average man, and you will find me excessively strong. I even compare to some men who work hard but don't necessarily work out, strength wise. Why? Don't ask. Dreams? Can dreams keep a warrior strong? Maybe. I still war, in my dreams. I just doesn't feel as bad as it did before therapy. And it doesn't leave me bathed in sweat and ready to kill. Therapy, that one set, did work. In spite of never having, of course, as they wish, never having been to war. Bah!
Dang but my home needs cleaned. I wish medicine would hurry up. Then again, they are trying a new medicine. Anything untested will be given a month to fit in and help. If it doesn't help, or I can't take it, of course it has to be eliminated. The spironolactone is the pill that I worry might be the problem. We will see. I just can't focus, again. And I am a bit tired. Nearly functional, getting closer, seeing small windows and taking them, but not... quite... there. Humping it up that hill, that is what is up. But to think that, even when I took the medicine detour and missed a few days on top of it, and went downhill pretty far, that I never quit? That is unheralded in my illness history. I am doing far better. I don't have to let go. I don't have to rest. Even if the results are the same, the internal mechanism is huge. I can keep my eye on the ball for my next time at bat. Life IS good.
Alrighty, time to scoot. Just wanted to... say something to all my fans. :p Loverly people, have a fine day. I am, and will continue it.
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Friday, July 29, 2011
The debt ceiling and all the rest whirling around it.
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In a perfect world, where people could just go along to get along, Rep. Boehner would be a fine speaker of the house. He doesn't ask for much, he gives quite a bit, and he can negotiate in such a way as to make some progress. Of course, some progress is usually essentially no progress, it simply isn't as bad as it was going to be. I think he is actually trying to do something, he just hasn't succeeded. Given who is living in the White house and that the senate is run by traitors, it is difficult to see how he could more than negotiate a slight change though, too. I guess the question in the back of my mind is, what would he do with a pro-American senate and president? Would he honestly push forward a balanced budget amendment? Would he honestly call for cuts, real cuts, and more cuts to entitlements? My guess is he would not.
As for Democrats, they are what they are. There are variations among them, but they can be kept to hold the line. The remaining Democrats are hard-core leftists. They know many of them will not be returning. And they know their basest of bases is all they have left and their only chance of reelection, so they will cow to them absolutely. They honestly do not care about the debt limit, spending, balanced budgets, or any of that. They have to see, many of them, that their bases have crumbled, that people don't want what is happening to happen with the debt, but either through a belief that their base is all they have and it is worth appeasing, or because they simply can't see any way out of it, they continue on a path to their own electoral wipe-out. I wonder if any of that would change if we have a repeat of 2008? Actually, I doubt it. There is a reason some things become extinct, they simply do not know how to change. They can't adapt.
Of course, it would be loverly to see the two party system change from Democrats and Republicans to Republicans and Libertarians (or even a grouping of Libertarian, Constitutional, and the Tea Party). Well, one can dream. Now that I think of it, that would be really interesting. Left wouldn't mean left any more, up and down would likewise be shifted. I think only professors, career women, and minorities would even miss the Democrat party. Oh but the button collections they have would be... just as worthless. ha
I knew the debt ceiling would be raised. I believed there would be no real cuts. I believed that it would be status quo. I even suspected some or many of the Tea Party membership would be bought out. I guess I am saying, while not at all happy with any of this, was there ever really an option given the government we have? Really? Don't forget to vote. Don't vote for a McCain, a Boehner, and for God's sake do not vote for a Democrat (for ANYTHING). Damned kids, anyway.
Oh, a blog friend had a picture I decided to steal and post in order to enhance the cheer I propose. Cheers! At least it brings perspective as to any "Why?" of my last picture though too. A twofer.
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In a perfect world, where people could just go along to get along, Rep. Boehner would be a fine speaker of the house. He doesn't ask for much, he gives quite a bit, and he can negotiate in such a way as to make some progress. Of course, some progress is usually essentially no progress, it simply isn't as bad as it was going to be. I think he is actually trying to do something, he just hasn't succeeded. Given who is living in the White house and that the senate is run by traitors, it is difficult to see how he could more than negotiate a slight change though, too. I guess the question in the back of my mind is, what would he do with a pro-American senate and president? Would he honestly push forward a balanced budget amendment? Would he honestly call for cuts, real cuts, and more cuts to entitlements? My guess is he would not.
As for Democrats, they are what they are. There are variations among them, but they can be kept to hold the line. The remaining Democrats are hard-core leftists. They know many of them will not be returning. And they know their basest of bases is all they have left and their only chance of reelection, so they will cow to them absolutely. They honestly do not care about the debt limit, spending, balanced budgets, or any of that. They have to see, many of them, that their bases have crumbled, that people don't want what is happening to happen with the debt, but either through a belief that their base is all they have and it is worth appeasing, or because they simply can't see any way out of it, they continue on a path to their own electoral wipe-out. I wonder if any of that would change if we have a repeat of 2008? Actually, I doubt it. There is a reason some things become extinct, they simply do not know how to change. They can't adapt.
Of course, it would be loverly to see the two party system change from Democrats and Republicans to Republicans and Libertarians (or even a grouping of Libertarian, Constitutional, and the Tea Party). Well, one can dream. Now that I think of it, that would be really interesting. Left wouldn't mean left any more, up and down would likewise be shifted. I think only professors, career women, and minorities would even miss the Democrat party. Oh but the button collections they have would be... just as worthless. ha
I knew the debt ceiling would be raised. I believed there would be no real cuts. I believed that it would be status quo. I even suspected some or many of the Tea Party membership would be bought out. I guess I am saying, while not at all happy with any of this, was there ever really an option given the government we have? Really? Don't forget to vote. Don't vote for a McCain, a Boehner, and for God's sake do not vote for a Democrat (for ANYTHING). Damned kids, anyway.
Oh, a blog friend had a picture I decided to steal and post in order to enhance the cheer I propose. Cheers! At least it brings perspective as to any "Why?" of my last picture though too. A twofer.
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Have you ever wondered what money, big money, and the national debt look like, in real terms (both funded and unfunded, the latter of the two is rarely if every actually discussed)? Well, here is what real money and debt looks like. (Shamelessly stolen from Ace of Spades HQ, who they stole it from shamelessly is anyone's guess.)
This is a gun I really like and want. The only thing better, to my mind, would be a solidly designed (for survival) semi-automatic design. Still, I think this gun would do much better in the long term. She might not be a beautiful thing to some people's eyes, but she would be one of my pride and joys.
(Shamelessly stolen from Desert Cat, who is doing freelance advertising (and causing some of us to drool.))
I've been watching the Catholic channel a bit. They have a priest who happens to be a physicist who has his own show. It is rather interesting. At first I was quite off-put by the combination. Well, more the physicist part of it. No, I don't mind physics. My problem is with physicists. They are often so sure, so public, and so wrong. In any case, after getting over my reservations, having seen bits of his show several times, I decided to give him a bit a chance. He, as a physicist, is still a bit preachy. But what he does have to say is quite interesting. Today, he came down to a main point. Physicists, solid ones who know their stuff (as it stands today), come down in one of two schools. Either they believe in a maker, a super entity that created everything and all (whether in a relationship or not is another thing). Or they believe in infinite alternate universes (which can neither be seen, nor visited, nor really tested for in any manner) which allows for the understanding currently accepted. True? Probably. I have been sort of watching physics off and on. It seems they are spending fortunes and huge amounts of time trying to theorize and prove alternative universes and such. This is often seen in science fiction as well. In any case, it was interesting.
While watching his show, I actually gained some idea of why science went secular and on to what it is now. Without someone to be current with the sciences and in the community who can tie religion to science and make sense of things, purely dedicated scientists are so involved with their work they simply cannot make any such connection. Further, those who choose to study science have traditionally been of a libertine nature, initially only nobility, then on to the children of the extremely wealthy. At one time, they had peasants standing around to do things for them, like holding numbers or objects in large groups, so the scientist could sort of have a "computer" of sorts, or visualizations. The combination has lead to what we have today. It is much like when you go to college and pretty much finally understanding your major (as it is taught), then discussing this with your parents. They simply don't "get it", what you are being taught and what you are figuring out. So it might be simpler to just consider them fools. At some point you figure out they have learned everything you have and rejected what of it they personally or professionally do not need and sifted out more of what is purely fiction. But it takes time. Why science has taken so long apart a whole other story. It does make sense though.
We would all love to be idealists. We would love to just have everything be fair, all people be equal, that health and age and on to death not be a reality. But that just is not the way it is, here, as things stands. Christians, of course, do or should believe there will be a time and place where this will happen. But not here. Socialists and communists believe they can make that heaven or whatever it really is here on earth (tower of babel), excluding God, created by the hand of man. I guess it comes down to whether you believe we (which comes down to you) can make heaven on earth or whether we have to wait, abide our time, and possibly be punished for doing good things as the way of it. Funny, there would be a great deal less horror if people would accept that heaven cannot be found or created on earth! How odd.
Well, on to... something. Have a great afternoon.
.
Have you ever wondered what money, big money, and the national debt look like, in real terms (both funded and unfunded, the latter of the two is rarely if every actually discussed)? Well, here is what real money and debt looks like. (Shamelessly stolen from Ace of Spades HQ, who they stole it from shamelessly is anyone's guess.)
This is a gun I really like and want. The only thing better, to my mind, would be a solidly designed (for survival) semi-automatic design. Still, I think this gun would do much better in the long term. She might not be a beautiful thing to some people's eyes, but she would be one of my pride and joys.
(Shamelessly stolen from Desert Cat, who is doing freelance advertising (and causing some of us to drool.))I've been watching the Catholic channel a bit. They have a priest who happens to be a physicist who has his own show. It is rather interesting. At first I was quite off-put by the combination. Well, more the physicist part of it. No, I don't mind physics. My problem is with physicists. They are often so sure, so public, and so wrong. In any case, after getting over my reservations, having seen bits of his show several times, I decided to give him a bit a chance. He, as a physicist, is still a bit preachy. But what he does have to say is quite interesting. Today, he came down to a main point. Physicists, solid ones who know their stuff (as it stands today), come down in one of two schools. Either they believe in a maker, a super entity that created everything and all (whether in a relationship or not is another thing). Or they believe in infinite alternate universes (which can neither be seen, nor visited, nor really tested for in any manner) which allows for the understanding currently accepted. True? Probably. I have been sort of watching physics off and on. It seems they are spending fortunes and huge amounts of time trying to theorize and prove alternative universes and such. This is often seen in science fiction as well. In any case, it was interesting.
While watching his show, I actually gained some idea of why science went secular and on to what it is now. Without someone to be current with the sciences and in the community who can tie religion to science and make sense of things, purely dedicated scientists are so involved with their work they simply cannot make any such connection. Further, those who choose to study science have traditionally been of a libertine nature, initially only nobility, then on to the children of the extremely wealthy. At one time, they had peasants standing around to do things for them, like holding numbers or objects in large groups, so the scientist could sort of have a "computer" of sorts, or visualizations. The combination has lead to what we have today. It is much like when you go to college and pretty much finally understanding your major (as it is taught), then discussing this with your parents. They simply don't "get it", what you are being taught and what you are figuring out. So it might be simpler to just consider them fools. At some point you figure out they have learned everything you have and rejected what of it they personally or professionally do not need and sifted out more of what is purely fiction. But it takes time. Why science has taken so long apart a whole other story. It does make sense though.
We would all love to be idealists. We would love to just have everything be fair, all people be equal, that health and age and on to death not be a reality. But that just is not the way it is, here, as things stands. Christians, of course, do or should believe there will be a time and place where this will happen. But not here. Socialists and communists believe they can make that heaven or whatever it really is here on earth (tower of babel), excluding God, created by the hand of man. I guess it comes down to whether you believe we (which comes down to you) can make heaven on earth or whether we have to wait, abide our time, and possibly be punished for doing good things as the way of it. Funny, there would be a great deal less horror if people would accept that heaven cannot be found or created on earth! How odd.
Well, on to... something. Have a great afternoon.
How to put it more precisely.
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Equality. The issue of many debates, much legislation, great social strife, and many headaches. It really isn't complicated. To say all men are equal, and live off the premise, is to be, truth in whole, an idiot. Given enough technology, enough laws, and a near blackout of anyone who disagrees, a shaming of those who say the truth, can allow for the perception of equality. Black, white, man, woman, even child, these are not equal, in any way, on any platform. To make them appear so is to create a system so corrupt it is unsustainable. This has been tried before. Not only was it tried, God Himself intervened. It was when a king attempted to build the tower of babel. As before, the languages are becoming so divergent that communication is becoming impossible. And, like before, one group will seize power, the rest will scatter. America and Europe have become the towers. The choice isn't whether a division of power and a scattering of the weak is inevitable, only how long before it happens and who will be scattering. Who will hold power and who will be out of favor.
I guess, in some ways, I do not care. I don't care if your daughter married a muslim, in spite of being raised a Christian. What doesn't she like about Christianity? You didn't raise her right. I don't care if your son married out of his race. Again, there is something wrong, does he disregard his own race? I don't care if you have friends of other races and creeds, out of curiosity or proximity. But do you really know them, trust them? Perhaps you trust them more than an average man on the street, but if you live in a place where commingling is possible, you probably don't trust him as much as you think. You don't realize it, but you simply trust no one, not even yourself. Or, more to the point, you aren't a very trustworthy man. Women aren't what I would ever have called trustworthy. They are fine in a limited set of situations, but they will sell out for simple and relatively low prices. They were designed to do that.
Go ahead, enjoy. When choices are made though, you won't have the same choices you do today. Your friend won't allow it for his own sake. And, more, because he never did choose you. He simply chose the weakest link to gain some standing, status, connection in the larger group, the majority. And in times of trouble, the first thing lower forms do is detach from the weak, or use them much more directly.
The system that has been created to foist this false brotherhood of man on men is crumbling. When a nation once known for it's poor being overweight and it's rich being thin begins to revert to the world norms of the starving poor, you know times are changing. I can't say I won't relish a bit what is about to happen. And yet I have to think that it could have been different. No white socialist of Obama's pedigree would ever have been elected. He is a quota. And what he has done and is doing is going to unleash poverty and revert everything back to some unknown previous social, civil, and economic past. There will be great repercussions from this. All of this was created by developing a system which has tried to prove that equality is true, and has done nothing but the opposite. In the end, it has bankrupted itself.
While I cannot say if any particular man, woman, or child is superior in one sense, I can say with great certainty what they might be superior for, in, or about. I can tell you a boy genius probably can't survive well, even in a group, without all the modern conveniences. I can tell you a woman can't drive a big rig full time without becoming disabled rather quickly. I can tell you men stink at rearing young as primary providers, no matter how they try they just weren't made to do it. Believe what you wish, just understand when it all comes down and the blinds are lifted off your eyes you will be well and truly amazed at what an ass you have made of yourself in your beliefs.
Don't even bother. I am just the messenger. I am giving you a heads up. Then again, stone me if you will. Just understand, this too will be on your conscience. And you already have so very much to atone for. Plus, it won't change the truth.
.
Equality. The issue of many debates, much legislation, great social strife, and many headaches. It really isn't complicated. To say all men are equal, and live off the premise, is to be, truth in whole, an idiot. Given enough technology, enough laws, and a near blackout of anyone who disagrees, a shaming of those who say the truth, can allow for the perception of equality. Black, white, man, woman, even child, these are not equal, in any way, on any platform. To make them appear so is to create a system so corrupt it is unsustainable. This has been tried before. Not only was it tried, God Himself intervened. It was when a king attempted to build the tower of babel. As before, the languages are becoming so divergent that communication is becoming impossible. And, like before, one group will seize power, the rest will scatter. America and Europe have become the towers. The choice isn't whether a division of power and a scattering of the weak is inevitable, only how long before it happens and who will be scattering. Who will hold power and who will be out of favor.
I guess, in some ways, I do not care. I don't care if your daughter married a muslim, in spite of being raised a Christian. What doesn't she like about Christianity? You didn't raise her right. I don't care if your son married out of his race. Again, there is something wrong, does he disregard his own race? I don't care if you have friends of other races and creeds, out of curiosity or proximity. But do you really know them, trust them? Perhaps you trust them more than an average man on the street, but if you live in a place where commingling is possible, you probably don't trust him as much as you think. You don't realize it, but you simply trust no one, not even yourself. Or, more to the point, you aren't a very trustworthy man. Women aren't what I would ever have called trustworthy. They are fine in a limited set of situations, but they will sell out for simple and relatively low prices. They were designed to do that.
Go ahead, enjoy. When choices are made though, you won't have the same choices you do today. Your friend won't allow it for his own sake. And, more, because he never did choose you. He simply chose the weakest link to gain some standing, status, connection in the larger group, the majority. And in times of trouble, the first thing lower forms do is detach from the weak, or use them much more directly.
The system that has been created to foist this false brotherhood of man on men is crumbling. When a nation once known for it's poor being overweight and it's rich being thin begins to revert to the world norms of the starving poor, you know times are changing. I can't say I won't relish a bit what is about to happen. And yet I have to think that it could have been different. No white socialist of Obama's pedigree would ever have been elected. He is a quota. And what he has done and is doing is going to unleash poverty and revert everything back to some unknown previous social, civil, and economic past. There will be great repercussions from this. All of this was created by developing a system which has tried to prove that equality is true, and has done nothing but the opposite. In the end, it has bankrupted itself.
While I cannot say if any particular man, woman, or child is superior in one sense, I can say with great certainty what they might be superior for, in, or about. I can tell you a boy genius probably can't survive well, even in a group, without all the modern conveniences. I can tell you a woman can't drive a big rig full time without becoming disabled rather quickly. I can tell you men stink at rearing young as primary providers, no matter how they try they just weren't made to do it. Believe what you wish, just understand when it all comes down and the blinds are lifted off your eyes you will be well and truly amazed at what an ass you have made of yourself in your beliefs.
Don't even bother. I am just the messenger. I am giving you a heads up. Then again, stone me if you will. Just understand, this too will be on your conscience. And you already have so very much to atone for. Plus, it won't change the truth.
Three women haunt me.
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The ones that got away. No, not ones that I messed up on, ones that were literally available for marriage. Well, two for sure and one a probable. Pretty? Oh yes. Two of them were model pretty and the other one would have been save for freckles (not gross or such, just too many to be technically in the field). I have seen two of them since. Oh, nothing liking bashing one's face against a brick wall, that's what bumping into them is like. What is worse, is whatever they liked about me then... they still like about me. One is married with two children and still gorgeous. The other was just getting a divorce but had also just gotten a hysterectomy. I haven't seen the other in years, thankfully, sadly.
In truth, I wasn't ready when they were. The first of them I came very close to getting pregnant. No, we abstained, but just barely. She was quick and devoted to staying chaste. High school, wouldn't you know. The second one was from another high school. The last I met in that last high school but we didn't... meet and become interested until our early 30's. It wouldn't have worked then. But I would have had kids. I can damn sure guarantee that. Still I am glad I didn't drag a women through this crap medical situation, or even as far as she would have gone with it. Hard to know though, some women bond more strongly the worse the deal. And it isn't like I am abusive. I simply don't function and get a bit testy when it is shoved in my face. I wonder what they would have thought after realizing it wasn't psychiatric, but actually medical instead? Who knows. Too many ifs to possibly ponder.
It's about bedtime. I am going to sleep while I can, as I may get a call tomorrow about the bike and I want to get right on that. I also have some other business I would like to work on and check on. Oh, one of my goals is, if I have money left at the end of the month, to sweep that all into savings for one of a number of projects or possible needs. I might have $300 to $600 this month, though some of that will go for a rocket stove. That is on top of a little that goes into savings automatically. Perhaps, if I get some business squared, and save a bit, I can pay my vehicle off and put that money against a few odd outstanding loans, then roll most of that up and put it against my home. All bills paid off I could almost double what I am paying on the home. But I also want something of a nestegg to begin improving the home for a future sale. Yes, prices are dropping, but they are dropping faster in the segment of houses one to two steps up from mine. Raising the value of this house, and having a good chunk of it paid, would make that transition quite a bit less painless. Ah, uhrm, just... thinking.
What do I want? More land and a slightly larger, more modern (depending) home. So long as there are trees, 5 to 10 acres, some outbuildings, and perhaps various water rights especially a well that could be or is fitted with a renewable energy pump and a standard one. Backup is your friend. One acre is good for up to 4 to 6 goats, a dozen chickens, and maybe a horse. I would like a place to have three to four horses, similar goats and chickens, ducks, and perhaps a milk cow and calf. Plus a bit more land for gardening. I am not sure being too far from town is the best idea. Actually having a small community act as a blockage to the few ways to enter an area would be good. Having to drive miles to shop is not all that fun. Just more thinking.
No, I'm not a perfect prepper. I actually am a bit dubious about those who build their mountain of steel in the wild wide open hinterlands. The cabin I lived in when I was a foster child was as close to the popular ideal of that as you could get, we even had running water (piped in from the creek of a spring). You could only access it via logging roads, further needing a 4x4 unless (like our neighbor) you were half insane. And, you could hear anyone coming for an hour or more. There were also numerous other logging roads out, so if someone was coming and you believed it was better to depart, they really couldn't have followed you. Plenty of wood, all the food you could store would be easily protected. But then, winters would have been tough. At least skis (though coming up would have been a major pain), perhaps while gas is available a snowmobile, and always the fear of simply being obliterated. No large towns anywhere close, only a small town down the mountain and then through the overpass or valley, whatever they called the main road in.
I wonder how many people have bugout bungalows that are uninhabitable part or even much of the year, if they really thought about it? Anyway, my reasoning is slightly different from the simple get-away. Then again I think many people really haven't ever been in wilderness. Knowing only the city, everything seems possible. It isn't. You could bring everything you want, everything you could need for years, or even want, and it just isn't the same. You go feral or you die. Even then you might just fall, or get hit by an avalanche, or simply starve because you lose your food and really don't have the skills to survive. You don't grow tomatoes in a month and a half, not at altitude, even with a glass house (unless you want to put it on stilts to stick out of 20 to 30 feet of snow, or more, and then... climb to it, and then figure out how to keep it warm enough, doubling or tripling your wood use, plus the problem of hauling... no). Not enough sun to make that worthwhile in any case, and the sun just wouldn't have had enough 'nutrients' for plants.
I keep reading specialized articles at survival blogs. Those are simply impossible for all but professionals, and even then rather unsustainable without manufacturing picking back up, and transport becoming possible, and some standard currency in place, and... And no EOTWAWKI. No, can't fantasize about having your cake and eating it too. Then again there are levels of disaster preparedness. EOTW is just the worst case. Like Zen, you learn in layers, I suppose. But some have simply jumped so far down the hole that they can never come back up (no, not you, your crap is good... except maybe to her). But even YOU know what I mean. I mean when YOU look over some of this stuff, you have to be saying... damn, that guy is an idiot. "I have my dozens of radios, with all the parts, and this, and that, and techy, and new age, and this goes here", and he doesn't even have a crew. He will go batshit and eat a barrel before six months, or worse.
Hmm, grumbling. Bed time. Good night.
.
The ones that got away. No, not ones that I messed up on, ones that were literally available for marriage. Well, two for sure and one a probable. Pretty? Oh yes. Two of them were model pretty and the other one would have been save for freckles (not gross or such, just too many to be technically in the field). I have seen two of them since. Oh, nothing liking bashing one's face against a brick wall, that's what bumping into them is like. What is worse, is whatever they liked about me then... they still like about me. One is married with two children and still gorgeous. The other was just getting a divorce but had also just gotten a hysterectomy. I haven't seen the other in years, thankfully, sadly.
In truth, I wasn't ready when they were. The first of them I came very close to getting pregnant. No, we abstained, but just barely. She was quick and devoted to staying chaste. High school, wouldn't you know. The second one was from another high school. The last I met in that last high school but we didn't... meet and become interested until our early 30's. It wouldn't have worked then. But I would have had kids. I can damn sure guarantee that. Still I am glad I didn't drag a women through this crap medical situation, or even as far as she would have gone with it. Hard to know though, some women bond more strongly the worse the deal. And it isn't like I am abusive. I simply don't function and get a bit testy when it is shoved in my face. I wonder what they would have thought after realizing it wasn't psychiatric, but actually medical instead? Who knows. Too many ifs to possibly ponder.
It's about bedtime. I am going to sleep while I can, as I may get a call tomorrow about the bike and I want to get right on that. I also have some other business I would like to work on and check on. Oh, one of my goals is, if I have money left at the end of the month, to sweep that all into savings for one of a number of projects or possible needs. I might have $300 to $600 this month, though some of that will go for a rocket stove. That is on top of a little that goes into savings automatically. Perhaps, if I get some business squared, and save a bit, I can pay my vehicle off and put that money against a few odd outstanding loans, then roll most of that up and put it against my home. All bills paid off I could almost double what I am paying on the home. But I also want something of a nestegg to begin improving the home for a future sale. Yes, prices are dropping, but they are dropping faster in the segment of houses one to two steps up from mine. Raising the value of this house, and having a good chunk of it paid, would make that transition quite a bit less painless. Ah, uhrm, just... thinking.
What do I want? More land and a slightly larger, more modern (depending) home. So long as there are trees, 5 to 10 acres, some outbuildings, and perhaps various water rights especially a well that could be or is fitted with a renewable energy pump and a standard one. Backup is your friend. One acre is good for up to 4 to 6 goats, a dozen chickens, and maybe a horse. I would like a place to have three to four horses, similar goats and chickens, ducks, and perhaps a milk cow and calf. Plus a bit more land for gardening. I am not sure being too far from town is the best idea. Actually having a small community act as a blockage to the few ways to enter an area would be good. Having to drive miles to shop is not all that fun. Just more thinking.
No, I'm not a perfect prepper. I actually am a bit dubious about those who build their mountain of steel in the wild wide open hinterlands. The cabin I lived in when I was a foster child was as close to the popular ideal of that as you could get, we even had running water (piped in from the creek of a spring). You could only access it via logging roads, further needing a 4x4 unless (like our neighbor) you were half insane. And, you could hear anyone coming for an hour or more. There were also numerous other logging roads out, so if someone was coming and you believed it was better to depart, they really couldn't have followed you. Plenty of wood, all the food you could store would be easily protected. But then, winters would have been tough. At least skis (though coming up would have been a major pain), perhaps while gas is available a snowmobile, and always the fear of simply being obliterated. No large towns anywhere close, only a small town down the mountain and then through the overpass or valley, whatever they called the main road in.
I wonder how many people have bugout bungalows that are uninhabitable part or even much of the year, if they really thought about it? Anyway, my reasoning is slightly different from the simple get-away. Then again I think many people really haven't ever been in wilderness. Knowing only the city, everything seems possible. It isn't. You could bring everything you want, everything you could need for years, or even want, and it just isn't the same. You go feral or you die. Even then you might just fall, or get hit by an avalanche, or simply starve because you lose your food and really don't have the skills to survive. You don't grow tomatoes in a month and a half, not at altitude, even with a glass house (unless you want to put it on stilts to stick out of 20 to 30 feet of snow, or more, and then... climb to it, and then figure out how to keep it warm enough, doubling or tripling your wood use, plus the problem of hauling... no). Not enough sun to make that worthwhile in any case, and the sun just wouldn't have had enough 'nutrients' for plants.
I keep reading specialized articles at survival blogs. Those are simply impossible for all but professionals, and even then rather unsustainable without manufacturing picking back up, and transport becoming possible, and some standard currency in place, and... And no EOTWAWKI. No, can't fantasize about having your cake and eating it too. Then again there are levels of disaster preparedness. EOTW is just the worst case. Like Zen, you learn in layers, I suppose. But some have simply jumped so far down the hole that they can never come back up (no, not you, your crap is good... except maybe to her). But even YOU know what I mean. I mean when YOU look over some of this stuff, you have to be saying... damn, that guy is an idiot. "I have my dozens of radios, with all the parts, and this, and that, and techy, and new age, and this goes here", and he doesn't even have a crew. He will go batshit and eat a barrel before six months, or worse.
Hmm, grumbling. Bed time. Good night.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
Life is getting much better again.
.
.
No call from the bike-man. I had really hoped it would be done today. He does work Friday but then not again until Monday. We will see, I guess. I did stay up until 13:00 and change. Not quite all day but it is turning around. Then again, I expect a bit of ruffled feathers as I go through feeling better. Perhaps, though, since I was still minimally maintaining medication, the fluctuation may not be as severe as that first death-bed to dancing episode. That was a rather extreme revitalization. I did receive a call, though I missed it, from the V.A. I couldn't find my cell phone! I could hear the damned thing, I just could not locate it. I called back immediately, after finding it (I hate it when I put a book on top of the phone). I will be getting my foot looked at in a few days. If the problem is what I suspect, I am hoping they can dig it out that day. Like I said, I have tried. But I don't have the special tools and knowledge. I hit blood so very fast and well before I even get to the root problem area. I would have a bloody hole there about the size of a fifty cent piece, my way. I would rather limp a bit, for now.
I'm not quite up to full ops, but I am simply feeling better, taking control of my sleep, and making plans. I am doing some things, usually when it is cool. This condition is pretty serious, I suppose it should have serious affects. The pains have all gone. I am sleeping well. All is back on track. Oh, I am doing things to help me remember to take the full dose of potassium. I can't take all 80 mEq at once, 40 mEq at a time is all I can stomach, and that in a 24 oz beer stein of Gatorade. That is the easiest stuff to 'forget' and forget to take. So I am putting the dose out and any time I happen to be in the kitchen looking for something to drink, I see the remaining dose right 'chere. In my face. Keep it simple stupid and functional... KISSAF, pronounced kiss-off? Yeah.
I think the bike is my key to getting even better, at this time. It should begin helping me to increase stamina. My strength is still unbelievably good. I don't know how I kept it. After twenty years of sitting, I shouldn't have been able to go from just doing a barbell to benching 400 in three months the last time (on Ritalin). Ritalin doesn't boost strength, stamina, nothing. By the way, working out on Ritalin with a really bad ticker... should have killed me? At that rate of increase? Remember, I was swimming at the same time, and went from a few laps to a mile of solid swimming per hour session in the same time period. Hmm, whatever.
Anyway, back to tinkering. I slept from 13:00 (and change) until about 18:00 or 19:00. I am more cat napping eight to ten hours of sleep a day in two chunks. It sure beats all sleep or no sleep. Which makes it fine, for now. Later.
.
No call from the bike-man. I had really hoped it would be done today. He does work Friday but then not again until Monday. We will see, I guess. I did stay up until 13:00 and change. Not quite all day but it is turning around. Then again, I expect a bit of ruffled feathers as I go through feeling better. Perhaps, though, since I was still minimally maintaining medication, the fluctuation may not be as severe as that first death-bed to dancing episode. That was a rather extreme revitalization. I did receive a call, though I missed it, from the V.A. I couldn't find my cell phone! I could hear the damned thing, I just could not locate it. I called back immediately, after finding it (I hate it when I put a book on top of the phone). I will be getting my foot looked at in a few days. If the problem is what I suspect, I am hoping they can dig it out that day. Like I said, I have tried. But I don't have the special tools and knowledge. I hit blood so very fast and well before I even get to the root problem area. I would have a bloody hole there about the size of a fifty cent piece, my way. I would rather limp a bit, for now.
I'm not quite up to full ops, but I am simply feeling better, taking control of my sleep, and making plans. I am doing some things, usually when it is cool. This condition is pretty serious, I suppose it should have serious affects. The pains have all gone. I am sleeping well. All is back on track. Oh, I am doing things to help me remember to take the full dose of potassium. I can't take all 80 mEq at once, 40 mEq at a time is all I can stomach, and that in a 24 oz beer stein of Gatorade. That is the easiest stuff to 'forget' and forget to take. So I am putting the dose out and any time I happen to be in the kitchen looking for something to drink, I see the remaining dose right 'chere. In my face. Keep it simple stupid and functional... KISSAF, pronounced kiss-off? Yeah.
I think the bike is my key to getting even better, at this time. It should begin helping me to increase stamina. My strength is still unbelievably good. I don't know how I kept it. After twenty years of sitting, I shouldn't have been able to go from just doing a barbell to benching 400 in three months the last time (on Ritalin). Ritalin doesn't boost strength, stamina, nothing. By the way, working out on Ritalin with a really bad ticker... should have killed me? At that rate of increase? Remember, I was swimming at the same time, and went from a few laps to a mile of solid swimming per hour session in the same time period. Hmm, whatever.
Anyway, back to tinkering. I slept from 13:00 (and change) until about 18:00 or 19:00. I am more cat napping eight to ten hours of sleep a day in two chunks. It sure beats all sleep or no sleep. Which makes it fine, for now. Later.
Awake, still.
.
.
Not a problem, I expected to be still going. It seems as I lose water and my blood pressure begins to drop, I get a surge. So far it is rather tame. I am hoping the surge will come up just a bit more. If it goes too high too fast I can always use it to cram-clean my house and my vest weight is waiting if needed as well. My home sort of needs a bit of work again, so I am actually hoping for at least a brief spurt. Nothing of particular great need, just lots of little things could be done or finished. If I can make it a full day today, I will. Being cooler, now, inside, life is smoother. So I simply don't mind being up.
I forgot to mention, duct tape works on moles. I had stopped using the tape for a day or so, and I did forget occasional for half a day to a day every fifth day of use or so. I decided to put the tape back on yesterday. When I took it off to shower last evening, what looked like blister over what had been the moles were open, the centers of the blister pockets opened and where removed by the tape. I hadn't even seen blisters when I put the tape on earlier that day and I had looked over the areas. In any case, when I saw that there was an opening, I again got out my trusty knife (the one that sliced my finger ever so well, I have used it every four or five days to probe the moles) and used the (very sharp, though not necessary for this project at all) point to extricate what looked to be the dead moles (virus cells, possibly mixed with some of my cells). They simple popped out. Into the trash, right away, as you simply cannot trust viruses! So, yes indeed, after about two weeks (give or take, and only mostly daily use), duct tape will indeed kill warts dead! Now I know.
Now to keep working the ears with oil. I lost track on that, in part due to my inability to figure out how to get water at a specific temperature (as close to my body temperature as possible). Though I think the wax is coming out in bits and pieces, there still are plugs in there. I did figure out what would work for obtaining just the right temperature of water... a cheese thermometer. However, while looking around at cheese thermometers, I started seeing that most people switched from the old style to digital, the very ones they used for cooking everything else. So I decided to give my digital a look. It does seem to have a reading that is low enough, and the alarm seems to work at that temp. So, I am all set (assuming I have a clean pot in which to boil water... working on it). :p
I am hoping for a call sometime today about the bike. I don't know if the guy is really busy and has to fit my bike in in the next few days or if he can get right to it. In any case, that is part of the reason I am trying to stay awake, along with that odd notion of living a functional 9:00 to 5:00 day (for no particular reason, at this point, but there may be a future in it). Still, there it is. I ought to see if my camera is working. The only problem with it might be that it needs new batteries (which I have). Rather than trying to transfer it to this old computer using a card reader I still haven't found, I will merely take the card into Walmart and have them create a CD (not dvd format, I suspect this loaner is very low-tech/archaic). Yes, I will put up some pictures, perhaps one with me on it. The camera has a timer and a base set for a tripod, which I also have (somewhere, unless it has been stolen too). It is a lousy camera, but will work for these purposes, mostly.
There is something else I have been thinking about with the bike. I am pretty sure, in time, that I will want a vehicle rack for the bike. They make one that installs in the hatch area, but I don't really like that. For starters, you have to remove the front tire. That is with normal bikes. Mine is a 29" bike, so it might not even work with that type of setup. Removing the front tire, too boot, would mean I would have to reset the disc brakes every time I transported the bike that way, potentially. The rear tire? No way, just for the record. So a hitch mounting kit would be perfect, probably a two bike hitch, just for expandability. Further I am considering a trailer for hauling gear or even leaves using the bike (think going to the "lake" for water, with, say, two to four five gallon containers and back. Six miles is a long way to walk and you would be lucky to lug two five gallon containers. I am not sure how difficult bike trailers are to make, though I think with a pipe bending kit, welding kit, a little ingenuity, and some spare parts, it might not be all that difficult. Making it strong enough to hold enough weight to be useful, balanced enough that little of the weight is placed on the bike, and light enough to manage? Those are other things altogether. More expensive, perhaps, in the end, if you get a decent welding gig (pipe benders for up to soft steel were rather inexpensive last time I checked and I would probably be using aluminum). But all those skills and tools would come in handy. Welding is on my list of things to learn, this would make a perfect project while I learn? Maybe. Back burner stuff, but... It's on my mind. Hmm, though welding aluminum is quite a trick, if I heard right. Anyway... Thinking...
Well, on to something. Have a great day.
.
Not a problem, I expected to be still going. It seems as I lose water and my blood pressure begins to drop, I get a surge. So far it is rather tame. I am hoping the surge will come up just a bit more. If it goes too high too fast I can always use it to cram-clean my house and my vest weight is waiting if needed as well. My home sort of needs a bit of work again, so I am actually hoping for at least a brief spurt. Nothing of particular great need, just lots of little things could be done or finished. If I can make it a full day today, I will. Being cooler, now, inside, life is smoother. So I simply don't mind being up.
I forgot to mention, duct tape works on moles. I had stopped using the tape for a day or so, and I did forget occasional for half a day to a day every fifth day of use or so. I decided to put the tape back on yesterday. When I took it off to shower last evening, what looked like blister over what had been the moles were open, the centers of the blister pockets opened and where removed by the tape. I hadn't even seen blisters when I put the tape on earlier that day and I had looked over the areas. In any case, when I saw that there was an opening, I again got out my trusty knife (the one that sliced my finger ever so well, I have used it every four or five days to probe the moles) and used the (very sharp, though not necessary for this project at all) point to extricate what looked to be the dead moles (virus cells, possibly mixed with some of my cells). They simple popped out. Into the trash, right away, as you simply cannot trust viruses! So, yes indeed, after about two weeks (give or take, and only mostly daily use), duct tape will indeed kill warts dead! Now I know.
Now to keep working the ears with oil. I lost track on that, in part due to my inability to figure out how to get water at a specific temperature (as close to my body temperature as possible). Though I think the wax is coming out in bits and pieces, there still are plugs in there. I did figure out what would work for obtaining just the right temperature of water... a cheese thermometer. However, while looking around at cheese thermometers, I started seeing that most people switched from the old style to digital, the very ones they used for cooking everything else. So I decided to give my digital a look. It does seem to have a reading that is low enough, and the alarm seems to work at that temp. So, I am all set (assuming I have a clean pot in which to boil water... working on it). :p
I am hoping for a call sometime today about the bike. I don't know if the guy is really busy and has to fit my bike in in the next few days or if he can get right to it. In any case, that is part of the reason I am trying to stay awake, along with that odd notion of living a functional 9:00 to 5:00 day (for no particular reason, at this point, but there may be a future in it). Still, there it is. I ought to see if my camera is working. The only problem with it might be that it needs new batteries (which I have). Rather than trying to transfer it to this old computer using a card reader I still haven't found, I will merely take the card into Walmart and have them create a CD (not dvd format, I suspect this loaner is very low-tech/archaic). Yes, I will put up some pictures, perhaps one with me on it. The camera has a timer and a base set for a tripod, which I also have (somewhere, unless it has been stolen too). It is a lousy camera, but will work for these purposes, mostly.
There is something else I have been thinking about with the bike. I am pretty sure, in time, that I will want a vehicle rack for the bike. They make one that installs in the hatch area, but I don't really like that. For starters, you have to remove the front tire. That is with normal bikes. Mine is a 29" bike, so it might not even work with that type of setup. Removing the front tire, too boot, would mean I would have to reset the disc brakes every time I transported the bike that way, potentially. The rear tire? No way, just for the record. So a hitch mounting kit would be perfect, probably a two bike hitch, just for expandability. Further I am considering a trailer for hauling gear or even leaves using the bike (think going to the "lake" for water, with, say, two to four five gallon containers and back. Six miles is a long way to walk and you would be lucky to lug two five gallon containers. I am not sure how difficult bike trailers are to make, though I think with a pipe bending kit, welding kit, a little ingenuity, and some spare parts, it might not be all that difficult. Making it strong enough to hold enough weight to be useful, balanced enough that little of the weight is placed on the bike, and light enough to manage? Those are other things altogether. More expensive, perhaps, in the end, if you get a decent welding gig (pipe benders for up to soft steel were rather inexpensive last time I checked and I would probably be using aluminum). But all those skills and tools would come in handy. Welding is on my list of things to learn, this would make a perfect project while I learn? Maybe. Back burner stuff, but... It's on my mind. Hmm, though welding aluminum is quite a trick, if I heard right. Anyway... Thinking...
Well, on to something. Have a great day.
How very odd.
.
.
I'll get to the title in a bit. I got the bike in, put a note on it, tried to ensure it went to a specific bike assembler. While there I did some shopping. I could not find one of the cheeses I was looking for, but I did find brie. I also picked up some other sorts of cheeses, including gouda, European style goat cheese (I want to try what I might be making someday), and camembert. I don't know, it's just a summer kick. Oh, they are pricey little items. So I keep it small and make it last then use every ounce whether I like it or not. If I don't particularly care for it, I try to use it up in new and exotic ways. Well, not really new or exotic. Melted on sandwiches, slivered or sliced over hot meat, over eggs, or with various pairings of fruits or vegetables according to what I think might set the cheese off. But I go on a search for a way to like the cheese.
I didn't just fumble with spices and herbs, I learned their flavors and decided what I thought they would go well with in regards to foods and other spices. And, usually, I did quite well. I did research the spice or herb, but often I found the recommendations either too sparse or sometimes simply wrong. At worst I overdid or the combination was a bit lackluster. The one thing I didn't quite get down was volume. That is a study all it's own and can only come after you "own" the spice or herb. There is truly so much to tinker with while cooking that it would be nearly impossible to ever not be surprised by some weird pairing or combination of ingredients. I worked up to having 41, slightly more at times, spices and herbs on my shelf. And I owned a couple dozen condiments, if I didn't always have each on hand at all times. All of which I knew how to pair and mix. From Mexican spices, to Italian, on into simple Americana. I even learned to do some interesting Indian mixes, some of which I relished so much I would not share, though I would offer bags of my mix. Curries, minus the actually curry (that is perfectly legal and well within their etiquette, so there). Curry itself is something I could not quite ever tolerate. It is ground so fine or I have an slight allergy to it. It always causes me to cough, gets caught in my craw.
Oh, I found the bill that I was behind on, and paid it right away. It was the city utility bill. Ack! But, I paid at least what I owed, and maybe a bit more. I might simply try to keep a positive balance on that. Oh, I know, it isn't technically smart to have them owing me. But the amount is so small that the loss is negligible. Anyway, it pleases me to no end to have finally figured out the missing bill. I still have other business to attend, but that one is the longest (second longest) outstanding problems.
Okay, the odd part. For whatever reason, now that I am back on medicine, time seems to move much more slowly. I am able to get much more done in seeming no time. I don't sit around wasting time thinking about what I need to do. I simply do it. I'm not up to full speed but I can see the difference. I will give them a break on not catching that my issue was heart failure when I was younger. No one ever expects that, not early heart failure at 21 or 22. But I can't forgive them missing how bad my heart was for the last decade. That was poor medical care. They just kept trying to push me into psychiatry, which can't help this kind of problem, ever. It probably can't help any problem, to be honest. But, back to time. It seems so odd to do so much, almost without thought, and even while in recovery, and still have time almost seem to not pass at all. Everything I did tonight I did in less than two hours, which included nearly an hour of window time!
I can only imagine what life would have been like with 20 years of this kind of push and a healthy heart. Lord knows, life would be a lot different. I probably would have stayed in the Navy, but gone on to become a special type of officer. How long I would have put up with the bullshit or survived is anyone's guess. But there are good things about the Service too. Heavy sticks, they wield those. But the carrots are quite good too. A ribbon or medal, a plaque or frameable letter, but more the gratitude of the men you serve with. What I received, while I was in, that made my world at the time above any other accolade was the handshake and heartfelt congratulations and thanks from a captain I admired. And getting a specific item pinned to my chest was something I'll never forget, in spite of or because of the bruising and blood. My boys put it on, no one will ever get to take it off.
Well, a little more tinkering then I am going to try and get some more rest. Catnapping around the heat and when I can and need makes doing things easier. But that isn't always possible. The medicines on half dose didn't quite cut it. And my tinkering with the water pill was absurd (but I was trying to go to what they thought was best, at one time). I guess I just had to see if they or I had the correct notion. It was my native instinct, in this case.
Good night.
.
I'll get to the title in a bit. I got the bike in, put a note on it, tried to ensure it went to a specific bike assembler. While there I did some shopping. I could not find one of the cheeses I was looking for, but I did find brie. I also picked up some other sorts of cheeses, including gouda, European style goat cheese (I want to try what I might be making someday), and camembert. I don't know, it's just a summer kick. Oh, they are pricey little items. So I keep it small and make it last then use every ounce whether I like it or not. If I don't particularly care for it, I try to use it up in new and exotic ways. Well, not really new or exotic. Melted on sandwiches, slivered or sliced over hot meat, over eggs, or with various pairings of fruits or vegetables according to what I think might set the cheese off. But I go on a search for a way to like the cheese.
I didn't just fumble with spices and herbs, I learned their flavors and decided what I thought they would go well with in regards to foods and other spices. And, usually, I did quite well. I did research the spice or herb, but often I found the recommendations either too sparse or sometimes simply wrong. At worst I overdid or the combination was a bit lackluster. The one thing I didn't quite get down was volume. That is a study all it's own and can only come after you "own" the spice or herb. There is truly so much to tinker with while cooking that it would be nearly impossible to ever not be surprised by some weird pairing or combination of ingredients. I worked up to having 41, slightly more at times, spices and herbs on my shelf. And I owned a couple dozen condiments, if I didn't always have each on hand at all times. All of which I knew how to pair and mix. From Mexican spices, to Italian, on into simple Americana. I even learned to do some interesting Indian mixes, some of which I relished so much I would not share, though I would offer bags of my mix. Curries, minus the actually curry (that is perfectly legal and well within their etiquette, so there). Curry itself is something I could not quite ever tolerate. It is ground so fine or I have an slight allergy to it. It always causes me to cough, gets caught in my craw.
Oh, I found the bill that I was behind on, and paid it right away. It was the city utility bill. Ack! But, I paid at least what I owed, and maybe a bit more. I might simply try to keep a positive balance on that. Oh, I know, it isn't technically smart to have them owing me. But the amount is so small that the loss is negligible. Anyway, it pleases me to no end to have finally figured out the missing bill. I still have other business to attend, but that one is the longest (second longest) outstanding problems.
Okay, the odd part. For whatever reason, now that I am back on medicine, time seems to move much more slowly. I am able to get much more done in seeming no time. I don't sit around wasting time thinking about what I need to do. I simply do it. I'm not up to full speed but I can see the difference. I will give them a break on not catching that my issue was heart failure when I was younger. No one ever expects that, not early heart failure at 21 or 22. But I can't forgive them missing how bad my heart was for the last decade. That was poor medical care. They just kept trying to push me into psychiatry, which can't help this kind of problem, ever. It probably can't help any problem, to be honest. But, back to time. It seems so odd to do so much, almost without thought, and even while in recovery, and still have time almost seem to not pass at all. Everything I did tonight I did in less than two hours, which included nearly an hour of window time!
I can only imagine what life would have been like with 20 years of this kind of push and a healthy heart. Lord knows, life would be a lot different. I probably would have stayed in the Navy, but gone on to become a special type of officer. How long I would have put up with the bullshit or survived is anyone's guess. But there are good things about the Service too. Heavy sticks, they wield those. But the carrots are quite good too. A ribbon or medal, a plaque or frameable letter, but more the gratitude of the men you serve with. What I received, while I was in, that made my world at the time above any other accolade was the handshake and heartfelt congratulations and thanks from a captain I admired. And getting a specific item pinned to my chest was something I'll never forget, in spite of or because of the bruising and blood. My boys put it on, no one will ever get to take it off.
Well, a little more tinkering then I am going to try and get some more rest. Catnapping around the heat and when I can and need makes doing things easier. But that isn't always possible. The medicines on half dose didn't quite cut it. And my tinkering with the water pill was absurd (but I was trying to go to what they thought was best, at one time). I guess I just had to see if they or I had the correct notion. It was my native instinct, in this case.
Good night.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
An excellent day!
.
.
No, no, I didn't do a dang thing. What else I didn't do is suffer. Between getting back on medicine, sleeping well, shutting down the house early on, and just opening the windows not facing the sun a bit ago, I have enjoyed the first superior day in weeks. The burning on my shoulders is gone. Only a slight ache remains, though more in the bones or something. It all has to come together but I am able to make it come together, if slowly and painfully and with help sometimes. Sure, I fell off for a bit, and am still picking myself up, but the fact is, this was excellent as far as spills go. I suspect in a day or two I will be back to even steven as far as I had gotten with the house and probably on ahead of where I was in a short time after that. If today is any indication in any case.
As I have been getting better, I have been using "No Script", an add-on for FireFox. What it does is allow you to check every single potential script enabler with any page on the internet you view. The default is that none of these pages or their contributing script sources are allowed access. With No Script, you can look up the particular source and see if it is safe or not. But beyond that, since sites often change hands with little or no notice, if it is not a site I know and use frequently, I only give them temporary access. As soon as I log out of the browser, access is deleted. I can't imagine how many system problems are created purely by bad scripting, not even including the malware, bugs, and trojans that are put into most computers not using systems like this. Who else is using your computer while you are, and even when you aren't?
Now, I will be honest, this only helps a bit. The truth is, your computer and internet access is about as secure as leaving your car unlocked with the keys in it in the worst parts of town. This program only helps, just a bit, and keeps the stupid and lazy hackers out. I am quite sure my machine is hacked, probably government though there might be others who are just stealing access or causing minor zombie machine works. But it does keep the lowly tics off the dog. The others? Get over it, the digital age has crushed anonymity and privacy. Governments, corporations, and individuals are nosing through your good and bad, purchases, and writing like dogs sniffing other dog's shit. Just, understand. Going off the grid sounds good, but I actually think you, if viewed correctly, probably sparkle like the sun compared to the sky when people go looking for you. They just have to have the correct algorithm to find you, but find you they will. Unless you go off the grid, travel, and keep moving. Just to set it straight.
Something else I have been doing is saving money. Not a lot, mind you. But I am shoring up my spending, cutting my expenses, saving bits at a time, watching what I buy, and yet continuing to buy the things I think will be vital. Food stores are weak, but I think I will fix that this coming month. At least a month or two of foods is the goal, for this month. As well as back on track with standard foods, so that I am not eating my short term supply. Dang it though, but those short term supplies have come in hugely helpful when I become ill. Now to figure out how not to dig into them though. At least they have been tested and found tasty. I have enough money to buy both the wood/coal deluxe stove and a water pasteurizer that goes with it. I am holding off to see what my expenses come to this month, as there are some extra costs coming in.
Anyway, life is getting back on track. Even when down I have been doing things I couldn't do before. I am using technology as much to my advantage as I can. I am keeping up on healthcare, even with a slip (that used to spell disaster). I am back on meds and should be on that stupid bike before the week is out. Not bad, not bad. Hmm, shower head into town and eat something special. Have a good night.
.
No, no, I didn't do a dang thing. What else I didn't do is suffer. Between getting back on medicine, sleeping well, shutting down the house early on, and just opening the windows not facing the sun a bit ago, I have enjoyed the first superior day in weeks. The burning on my shoulders is gone. Only a slight ache remains, though more in the bones or something. It all has to come together but I am able to make it come together, if slowly and painfully and with help sometimes. Sure, I fell off for a bit, and am still picking myself up, but the fact is, this was excellent as far as spills go. I suspect in a day or two I will be back to even steven as far as I had gotten with the house and probably on ahead of where I was in a short time after that. If today is any indication in any case.
As I have been getting better, I have been using "No Script", an add-on for FireFox. What it does is allow you to check every single potential script enabler with any page on the internet you view. The default is that none of these pages or their contributing script sources are allowed access. With No Script, you can look up the particular source and see if it is safe or not. But beyond that, since sites often change hands with little or no notice, if it is not a site I know and use frequently, I only give them temporary access. As soon as I log out of the browser, access is deleted. I can't imagine how many system problems are created purely by bad scripting, not even including the malware, bugs, and trojans that are put into most computers not using systems like this. Who else is using your computer while you are, and even when you aren't?
Now, I will be honest, this only helps a bit. The truth is, your computer and internet access is about as secure as leaving your car unlocked with the keys in it in the worst parts of town. This program only helps, just a bit, and keeps the stupid and lazy hackers out. I am quite sure my machine is hacked, probably government though there might be others who are just stealing access or causing minor zombie machine works. But it does keep the lowly tics off the dog. The others? Get over it, the digital age has crushed anonymity and privacy. Governments, corporations, and individuals are nosing through your good and bad, purchases, and writing like dogs sniffing other dog's shit. Just, understand. Going off the grid sounds good, but I actually think you, if viewed correctly, probably sparkle like the sun compared to the sky when people go looking for you. They just have to have the correct algorithm to find you, but find you they will. Unless you go off the grid, travel, and keep moving. Just to set it straight.
Something else I have been doing is saving money. Not a lot, mind you. But I am shoring up my spending, cutting my expenses, saving bits at a time, watching what I buy, and yet continuing to buy the things I think will be vital. Food stores are weak, but I think I will fix that this coming month. At least a month or two of foods is the goal, for this month. As well as back on track with standard foods, so that I am not eating my short term supply. Dang it though, but those short term supplies have come in hugely helpful when I become ill. Now to figure out how not to dig into them though. At least they have been tested and found tasty. I have enough money to buy both the wood/coal deluxe stove and a water pasteurizer that goes with it. I am holding off to see what my expenses come to this month, as there are some extra costs coming in.
Anyway, life is getting back on track. Even when down I have been doing things I couldn't do before. I am using technology as much to my advantage as I can. I am keeping up on healthcare, even with a slip (that used to spell disaster). I am back on meds and should be on that stupid bike before the week is out. Not bad, not bad. Hmm, shower head into town and eat something special. Have a good night.
Fine and dandy.
.
.
Sleep was absolutely wonderful. After getting the house cooled down, I closed everything early this morning. At 17:00 the house is about 76 F. While only 4 F less than what it was running, that 4 F is significant. I can easily live with 76 F, which is running from 15 to 20 F cooler than outside. Add fans and it is simply delightful, comparatively. As well, any humidity that might otherwise come in doesn't. Perhaps as what of dew exists, or what comes on the winds during heating in the morning? I don't know, it just seems less humid. Since I don't have a gauge, I don't actually know, just a 'felt' thing.
I needed that sleep. Between being a bit off due to meds, a bit off due to heat, and of course just... being a bit off all by my lonesome, sleep had been a wretched thing for some time. Brutal, hard to control, not very restful, difficult to shake, and hot and sweaty on top of it. Meds might be helping again, though I can't swear to it. I have already started dropping weight, 5 pounds so far, which means water, so there is that. And I had wondered if, on top of everything else, water weight specifically held in more heat or somehow in some way made heat less tolerable. My blood pressure is still elevated, but that usually takes a little time to bring down. It might take a week or two to get things back in order. But I have never quit... trying. No rest for me, not now, or at least not yet. I need to get into a solid regular 'low orbit', keep it there for a bit with plenty on my plate comparatively, and then I can relax a bit but only by maintaining that 'low orbit' of activity instead of shooting for a higher orbit.
Oh, the other day I saw a debate about birth control. I had been hitting that blog hard, so I decided not to pump more of my thought into the place. Even so-called conservative women become a bit drawn out with continued use. So I thought I would write it up here. The notion being presented was, now that there (apparently, not independently verified) is a contraception for men, an injection that places a device or dose of medicine in the bicep, which is clear visible and felt, whether women should also be forced to use a form of contraception which is visible. The suggestion was that feminists would wheeze and moan about any such proofing.
I hated to break it to her, but whether feminists complained about this was actually a moot point. Oh, sure, they might complain. But they complain about everything. If you understand that feminists, whether they understand it or not and being mostly women there is some notion that they may not actually be fundamentally capable of understand what they do, they are for contracepting as many children from being born as possible. They are for this form of societal, self-imposed, genocide, just as they are for abortion, which is the other part of it. For often siding with the "greens" (oddly, considering how much the pill pollutes the water system) and "naturalists" (despite the fact that both contraception and abortion are completely unnatural horrors only few animals in the most dire of situations can sometimes enact (think rats)), they either do not understand or they are outright hypocrites.
What I am saying is, arguing with feminists about the minor issue means you have already surrendered to their main points. This is like the Repubs debating Obama, to date. They always lose because he moves the goalpost and complains he isn't getting his way, after he has pretty much gotten everything he wanted and just looks for a few more peckings, and they RUN to accommodate. And they yield and yield and yield until they might as well have been Demos. No, Helen, having women prove they have contracepted is not "showing feminists!". *sigh* Modern women. You can tell em'. You just can't tell em' much.
Oh, and to add cheer to joy, enjoy this.
Well, off to sort of wake up and then to figure some things out. Have a wonderful afternoon. I myself shall endeavor to enjoy my 'morning'. What's that you say? "But, Doom, it's afternoon"! Bugger off, it's morning somewhere you, you... you!
.
Sleep was absolutely wonderful. After getting the house cooled down, I closed everything early this morning. At 17:00 the house is about 76 F. While only 4 F less than what it was running, that 4 F is significant. I can easily live with 76 F, which is running from 15 to 20 F cooler than outside. Add fans and it is simply delightful, comparatively. As well, any humidity that might otherwise come in doesn't. Perhaps as what of dew exists, or what comes on the winds during heating in the morning? I don't know, it just seems less humid. Since I don't have a gauge, I don't actually know, just a 'felt' thing.
I needed that sleep. Between being a bit off due to meds, a bit off due to heat, and of course just... being a bit off all by my lonesome, sleep had been a wretched thing for some time. Brutal, hard to control, not very restful, difficult to shake, and hot and sweaty on top of it. Meds might be helping again, though I can't swear to it. I have already started dropping weight, 5 pounds so far, which means water, so there is that. And I had wondered if, on top of everything else, water weight specifically held in more heat or somehow in some way made heat less tolerable. My blood pressure is still elevated, but that usually takes a little time to bring down. It might take a week or two to get things back in order. But I have never quit... trying. No rest for me, not now, or at least not yet. I need to get into a solid regular 'low orbit', keep it there for a bit with plenty on my plate comparatively, and then I can relax a bit but only by maintaining that 'low orbit' of activity instead of shooting for a higher orbit.
Oh, the other day I saw a debate about birth control. I had been hitting that blog hard, so I decided not to pump more of my thought into the place. Even so-called conservative women become a bit drawn out with continued use. So I thought I would write it up here. The notion being presented was, now that there (apparently, not independently verified) is a contraception for men, an injection that places a device or dose of medicine in the bicep, which is clear visible and felt, whether women should also be forced to use a form of contraception which is visible. The suggestion was that feminists would wheeze and moan about any such proofing.
I hated to break it to her, but whether feminists complained about this was actually a moot point. Oh, sure, they might complain. But they complain about everything. If you understand that feminists, whether they understand it or not and being mostly women there is some notion that they may not actually be fundamentally capable of understand what they do, they are for contracepting as many children from being born as possible. They are for this form of societal, self-imposed, genocide, just as they are for abortion, which is the other part of it. For often siding with the "greens" (oddly, considering how much the pill pollutes the water system) and "naturalists" (despite the fact that both contraception and abortion are completely unnatural horrors only few animals in the most dire of situations can sometimes enact (think rats)), they either do not understand or they are outright hypocrites.
What I am saying is, arguing with feminists about the minor issue means you have already surrendered to their main points. This is like the Repubs debating Obama, to date. They always lose because he moves the goalpost and complains he isn't getting his way, after he has pretty much gotten everything he wanted and just looks for a few more peckings, and they RUN to accommodate. And they yield and yield and yield until they might as well have been Demos. No, Helen, having women prove they have contracepted is not "showing feminists!". *sigh* Modern women. You can tell em'. You just can't tell em' much.
Oh, and to add cheer to joy, enjoy this.
Well, off to sort of wake up and then to figure some things out. Have a wonderful afternoon. I myself shall endeavor to enjoy my 'morning'. What's that you say? "But, Doom, it's afternoon"! Bugger off, it's morning somewhere you, you... you!
Training a cat.
.
.
Oh, not impossible at all. However, one must start with certain understandings. First, cats often know what you want them to do. They simply have no incentive to perform. Second, what works for this animal or that does not work with a cat. They are the union members of the animal family. Good pay AND benefits are required. Further, you have to request the acts and pay well. Sam simply is not interested in being trained. Sassy is only interested in food. Having been fixed before she ever went into heat, she is like the typical chemically fixed housewife. If she could manage the television I would find her watching Oprah I am sure.
When I started, and Sassy was very young, she would do small tricks for a single kibble. Not standard food, mind you, the treat stuff. As she ballooned, that one kibble simply isn't incentive enough. Finally, I decided to break down. For three kibbles she will slay people, I think. No need for that, thankfully. But she will now perform the tricks easily, happily, and immediately. Now, will she ever do the tricks for free? That is yet to be known. I have my doubts. She isn't, after all, a dog. :p
She still isn't sure if she likes me. At just over a year old, I am told she is about a seven year old. She has learned not to claw me, or use claws to jump on or off me like she does other things. She is being a lot more mellow, kind, and even affectionate compared to her needy 'early years'. But she is still very much a juvenile and still very much self-involved. Oh, I suppose Sam is too, mostly. But she has learned to share her self-involvement, to appreciate companionship, and to be much more mellow. Save when it comes to Sassy, and Sassy just brings to Sam what she brings to the world... In her words, she brings "ME!!!". Still, I enjoy watching her grow, learn, play, fight (Sam or me), and just live. Brat!
Hmm, I think it is about time to try and load up the bike and get it into town. The nice thing about ordering from a store that is open 24 hours a day is, I repeat myself somehow. It is quite nice to have this cool night tonight to work in. I may begin simply staying up later, going to sleep while it is still cool and sleeping off some of the heat (as I can), napping when I must, and just working through the oddities that entails. I have no serious need of a 9:00 to 5:00, I just... it was a goal. I suppose I can just set that aside for now and do what I must. Perhaps if I am not fighting sleep and heat and everything else all at once I might be able to get to other things. I will still have the afternoon to try and get what work needs doing done. And mornings should it be heavier work and I decide to stay up a bit longer. Just... thinking, planning, sorting.
Just imagine if there is no such thing as an air conditioner or a furnace or even a fan. No, not a comfy thought. Very possible, slightly unlikely long term, life changing if it came to pass. I don't think we could ever go back to stone age, or not for long. Too much information is cataloged. Too many people can read that information. People are inventive, and are equal parts construction and destruction. On the plus side, there would be no tax save sweat and tears. Be careful what you wish for.
Good night.
.
Oh, not impossible at all. However, one must start with certain understandings. First, cats often know what you want them to do. They simply have no incentive to perform. Second, what works for this animal or that does not work with a cat. They are the union members of the animal family. Good pay AND benefits are required. Further, you have to request the acts and pay well. Sam simply is not interested in being trained. Sassy is only interested in food. Having been fixed before she ever went into heat, she is like the typical chemically fixed housewife. If she could manage the television I would find her watching Oprah I am sure.
When I started, and Sassy was very young, she would do small tricks for a single kibble. Not standard food, mind you, the treat stuff. As she ballooned, that one kibble simply isn't incentive enough. Finally, I decided to break down. For three kibbles she will slay people, I think. No need for that, thankfully. But she will now perform the tricks easily, happily, and immediately. Now, will she ever do the tricks for free? That is yet to be known. I have my doubts. She isn't, after all, a dog. :p
She still isn't sure if she likes me. At just over a year old, I am told she is about a seven year old. She has learned not to claw me, or use claws to jump on or off me like she does other things. She is being a lot more mellow, kind, and even affectionate compared to her needy 'early years'. But she is still very much a juvenile and still very much self-involved. Oh, I suppose Sam is too, mostly. But she has learned to share her self-involvement, to appreciate companionship, and to be much more mellow. Save when it comes to Sassy, and Sassy just brings to Sam what she brings to the world... In her words, she brings "ME!!!". Still, I enjoy watching her grow, learn, play, fight (Sam or me), and just live. Brat!
Hmm, I think it is about time to try and load up the bike and get it into town. The nice thing about ordering from a store that is open 24 hours a day is, I repeat myself somehow. It is quite nice to have this cool night tonight to work in. I may begin simply staying up later, going to sleep while it is still cool and sleeping off some of the heat (as I can), napping when I must, and just working through the oddities that entails. I have no serious need of a 9:00 to 5:00, I just... it was a goal. I suppose I can just set that aside for now and do what I must. Perhaps if I am not fighting sleep and heat and everything else all at once I might be able to get to other things. I will still have the afternoon to try and get what work needs doing done. And mornings should it be heavier work and I decide to stay up a bit longer. Just... thinking, planning, sorting.
Just imagine if there is no such thing as an air conditioner or a furnace or even a fan. No, not a comfy thought. Very possible, slightly unlikely long term, life changing if it came to pass. I don't think we could ever go back to stone age, or not for long. Too much information is cataloged. Too many people can read that information. People are inventive, and are equal parts construction and destruction. On the plus side, there would be no tax save sweat and tears. Be careful what you wish for.
Good night.
Hmm.
.
.
The nap was wretched but being awake in the heat was worse. I have to figure something out. It is now getting to 80 in the house. I am not sure why, as I don't think it was that bad last year. Then again I could simply have been in better shape, in some weird way. It is 10 to 15 degrees hotter outside. Given that I have no ac, that is quite a difference, but it isn't enough. I am shutting all but the back windows much earlier as the heat of the day is quicker and fiercer. Moving the fan to blow right on me does help a bit more. No more oscillation, just a steady stream of hot but moving air.
I keep thinking about this man being called a terrorist. While I share few of his ideals and would not kill, at this point, I have to think that what he has done is neither incorrect nor abominable. What he has done is point out that his way of life and his very culture, what of it is left after socialism, is being shredded. He was raised in a soft socialism that allowed him to do as he pleased. No real rules were set in place. The Church is dead there, so there no sin to them. Oh, there are laws, but, what of them? Everyone could pretty much to anything, even the most severe crimes are lightly punished (if you can call it punishment). His people became lax. Work ethic doesn't really exist. Having children? Why bother, there is the state. Some still do, but more for obscure reasons. Children, if they are anything like America, are often more like pets. Aren't they so CUTE!
Then, once they had this perfect slow but comfortable suicide going, the government and business decided they needed volume for workers. So, they brought in people. Those people are not only foreign, they are outright hostile to everything that has been put in place. They are criminally, if unpunished for it, insensitive. They are literally murdering and raping and at most receiving light taps of so-called justice. Their government just opened the door. Further, they breed fast compared to the slow almost accidental breeding native population. They are violent and uneducated, indoctrinated, and they believe they have a free pass to that.
So, he commits genocide against a group of children from those who have brought about these changes and... people act surprised, startled, taken aback. Why in the world would he do such a thing? Why? He points out very clearly by his actions exactly what his state is doing to his people, albeit slowly. His government encouraged it's people not to breed. It encouraged them not to work hard. It discouraged everything from the native population that would have precluded this large, hostile, foreign group being needed. And then it brought them in head-over-heals. His government IS murdering his people, just more slowly through encouraged abortion, contraception, and assisted suicide, and through proxy of a violent group of foreigners. The Spanish Inquisition was not brought about because muslims are negotiable peaceful people. It wasn't brought about because they are lawful. They were quite willing to take on the Catholic faith in spite of having no such affiliation. They do NOT assimilate, at all, ever. Nor have they ever.
What he did, some will say, is absolutely and unequivocally wrong. I can't say that. I won't say it. I will say it is unfortunate he saw the need, or more that the need exists. It is unfortunate he had to waste his life fighting for his people, many of whom will never even understand until it is far too late (which, if I am guessing, unless nations go the way of this man and the Spain of antiquities if in a secular fashion as that is all they have), then it is too late. It is probably true with America as well. In some ways, it is probably "later" on that timeline in America than it is in Europe.
Advocate? I advocate little. I just see what is happening. And I can't blame the participants for fury, hatred, murder, especially since they have been trained that there is no real good or bad. Further, is it murder to want to survive? I find it quite unfortunate that our dear leaders have left people with no choice. It almost looks like they set this up. Some say ignorance is bliss, others say there is no such thing as ignorance. Perhaps their notions are merely impossible dreamers, poets, artists of politics stretching dreams too far. I don't think so. I think either knowingly directly or indirectly they charged ahead hoping to create the kind of murderous frenzy that allows populists to gain even more power, and as always eventual hard defeat. I suppose they keep hoping for the Stalin, Pol Pot, or Obama who will win and either keep it going forever and disappear history as they have tried to do, or will wipe out man. The pigs tail and snout are so similar when the light is fading. I guess I am saying who can be right in any of what is about to unfold?
I will hold onto my Christian faith, even if it kills me. I will not push over that line and attempt to take the most Godly path available. I won't do for others what they do not desire, not even for their own good. I would recommend you find God and hold onto Him. I think that was the shot heard around history.
.
The nap was wretched but being awake in the heat was worse. I have to figure something out. It is now getting to 80 in the house. I am not sure why, as I don't think it was that bad last year. Then again I could simply have been in better shape, in some weird way. It is 10 to 15 degrees hotter outside. Given that I have no ac, that is quite a difference, but it isn't enough. I am shutting all but the back windows much earlier as the heat of the day is quicker and fiercer. Moving the fan to blow right on me does help a bit more. No more oscillation, just a steady stream of hot but moving air.
I keep thinking about this man being called a terrorist. While I share few of his ideals and would not kill, at this point, I have to think that what he has done is neither incorrect nor abominable. What he has done is point out that his way of life and his very culture, what of it is left after socialism, is being shredded. He was raised in a soft socialism that allowed him to do as he pleased. No real rules were set in place. The Church is dead there, so there no sin to them. Oh, there are laws, but, what of them? Everyone could pretty much to anything, even the most severe crimes are lightly punished (if you can call it punishment). His people became lax. Work ethic doesn't really exist. Having children? Why bother, there is the state. Some still do, but more for obscure reasons. Children, if they are anything like America, are often more like pets. Aren't they so CUTE!
Then, once they had this perfect slow but comfortable suicide going, the government and business decided they needed volume for workers. So, they brought in people. Those people are not only foreign, they are outright hostile to everything that has been put in place. They are criminally, if unpunished for it, insensitive. They are literally murdering and raping and at most receiving light taps of so-called justice. Their government just opened the door. Further, they breed fast compared to the slow almost accidental breeding native population. They are violent and uneducated, indoctrinated, and they believe they have a free pass to that.
So, he commits genocide against a group of children from those who have brought about these changes and... people act surprised, startled, taken aback. Why in the world would he do such a thing? Why? He points out very clearly by his actions exactly what his state is doing to his people, albeit slowly. His government encouraged it's people not to breed. It encouraged them not to work hard. It discouraged everything from the native population that would have precluded this large, hostile, foreign group being needed. And then it brought them in head-over-heals. His government IS murdering his people, just more slowly through encouraged abortion, contraception, and assisted suicide, and through proxy of a violent group of foreigners. The Spanish Inquisition was not brought about because muslims are negotiable peaceful people. It wasn't brought about because they are lawful. They were quite willing to take on the Catholic faith in spite of having no such affiliation. They do NOT assimilate, at all, ever. Nor have they ever.
What he did, some will say, is absolutely and unequivocally wrong. I can't say that. I won't say it. I will say it is unfortunate he saw the need, or more that the need exists. It is unfortunate he had to waste his life fighting for his people, many of whom will never even understand until it is far too late (which, if I am guessing, unless nations go the way of this man and the Spain of antiquities if in a secular fashion as that is all they have), then it is too late. It is probably true with America as well. In some ways, it is probably "later" on that timeline in America than it is in Europe.
Advocate? I advocate little. I just see what is happening. And I can't blame the participants for fury, hatred, murder, especially since they have been trained that there is no real good or bad. Further, is it murder to want to survive? I find it quite unfortunate that our dear leaders have left people with no choice. It almost looks like they set this up. Some say ignorance is bliss, others say there is no such thing as ignorance. Perhaps their notions are merely impossible dreamers, poets, artists of politics stretching dreams too far. I don't think so. I think either knowingly directly or indirectly they charged ahead hoping to create the kind of murderous frenzy that allows populists to gain even more power, and as always eventual hard defeat. I suppose they keep hoping for the Stalin, Pol Pot, or Obama who will win and either keep it going forever and disappear history as they have tried to do, or will wipe out man. The pigs tail and snout are so similar when the light is fading. I guess I am saying who can be right in any of what is about to unfold?
I will hold onto my Christian faith, even if it kills me. I will not push over that line and attempt to take the most Godly path available. I won't do for others what they do not desire, not even for their own good. I would recommend you find God and hold onto Him. I think that was the shot heard around history.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
The heat is just becoming nasty.
.
.
It still cools to the 60's at night, but that is of little comfort during the day. Even at night, it isn't really cool until just before the sun rises, of course. First it takes so long to cool, then getting that cool air in. By the time it cools down it begins to get hot. A few hours in early to mid morning, say four hours? Yeah. I have been looking at options though. Higher temps and my current health simply do not seem to be mixing well. I shouldn't complain too much. Another month and a half and the world becomes more like I like it.
Oh heck, I think I am going to try to nap until the world cools a bit more. Hmm, I wonder if the lake is open for swimming yet. With the water we got and the melt still coming down, it might not be. It is a reservoir, truth be told. So it might still be too deep and too cold. I really ought to find out. Later.
.
It still cools to the 60's at night, but that is of little comfort during the day. Even at night, it isn't really cool until just before the sun rises, of course. First it takes so long to cool, then getting that cool air in. By the time it cools down it begins to get hot. A few hours in early to mid morning, say four hours? Yeah. I have been looking at options though. Higher temps and my current health simply do not seem to be mixing well. I shouldn't complain too much. Another month and a half and the world becomes more like I like it.
Oh heck, I think I am going to try to nap until the world cools a bit more. Hmm, I wonder if the lake is open for swimming yet. With the water we got and the melt still coming down, it might not be. It is a reservoir, truth be told. So it might still be too deep and too cold. I really ought to find out. Later.
What an odd little world and what a strange group of people.
.
.
The more I consider "liberals", "neochristians", and the like the more I do see one thing for certain. Their mere existence causes me to dig into why I am who I am. Their questions are usually seemingly pointless. And they cannot be changed, from my experiences. Nor do they see facts for what they are or ever try to quantify or quality test. "Feeding the people is good! Why Christ did that with the loaves (if that is fiction).", they might say. No, Christ fed people who happened to have followed Him (against his advice I might add, to a degree, on at least one of those occasions anyway). He didn't base His ministry on feeding the hungry any more than He did so on healing the lame, blind, diseased, and ill. Those things He did, they were a part of His proof perhaps, but more they were examples of compassion and an example of what we really can do, with faith. And, yes, miracles, literal real miracles, happen every day. Your next breath is a miracle, but a seemingly mundane one. There are absolutely scientifically and historically impossible things that happen so often believers know.
In any case, without those people I would potentially not be who I am and I certainly wouldn't know well nearly so well. Then again, that is only consciously. I know or believe enough to get me through what I don't know. In a way, I am grateful for fools of the lower orders. And still I hope for a day when only those who understand perfectly are allowed to roam freely. Or, I should say know and adhere, as I believe we all already know everything, only maintaining pieces of it consciously albeit. Everyone knows what is right and wrong on at least a minor scale. Many choose not to be right. Those are the ones I will have little sorrow for their lack of presence. Unlike some, however, I will let God sort it out.
This new terrorist, the story keeps changing. First he was a fundamentalist (Christian), conservative, anti-immigration, nationalist. At least two of those have been blown out of the water, as I suspected they would be. First, he is not a Christian, of any sort. Second, he is not a conservative. The Unibomber seems to be his main source. What it boils down to is that this man is a atheist national socialist. Uhrm, not exactly what is still being portrayed. As to his motives however, they are not that of a madman. His writings aren't even his. He is merely a man beset by changes he cannot control. I would say his actions, not his guilt, are free from that of the insane. I might even say due to the plight of his people, his guilt is questionable. I have some notion that this is just the beginning.
People in Europe are beyond wits ends dealing with governments that not only govern poorly but add insult to injury by bringing in foreigners they will not, perhaps cannot, control. Once enough people, there, get a taste of and for blood, there will be no stopping it. They sort of have a history of bloodletting. And if the government will not simply protect them, they will at first, like this man, do it themselves. Until enough people side with them publicly, and change the government. But populist swings in small nations can be terrible. They no longer depend on the Middle-East for oil, so they no longer need fear repercussions.
Right, wrong? In some cases there is so much wrong that there can't be right anywhere in the whole context to be found. The same can be said for America, which is reaching many boiling points as well. A mere 100 Republicans are holding the line. I think there is a collective holding of breath, waiting for this next election. But if things do not change, things will definitely change. I am just an observer, perhaps a survivor. I just write what the crystal ball is telling me. Governments need to step up and offer security or put it in the hands of the people and shut it. If they do not begin kicking out illegal aliens and figuring out how to do an enforceable guest worker program, they will find out just how tough it can really be. And it looks like their children may be the targets. Right? Wrong? What is genocide through "immigration reform"? Just a slower form of the same thing.
Crazy? Maybe. Maybe we all are, one way or another. I'm just making notes, analyzing, calculating, and preparing to hunker down until the storm passes. The left has had it's way for over a century now. It is time to begin the undoing. Financials to policies to... everything. It has begun.
.
The more I consider "liberals", "neochristians", and the like the more I do see one thing for certain. Their mere existence causes me to dig into why I am who I am. Their questions are usually seemingly pointless. And they cannot be changed, from my experiences. Nor do they see facts for what they are or ever try to quantify or quality test. "Feeding the people is good! Why Christ did that with the loaves (if that is fiction).", they might say. No, Christ fed people who happened to have followed Him (against his advice I might add, to a degree, on at least one of those occasions anyway). He didn't base His ministry on feeding the hungry any more than He did so on healing the lame, blind, diseased, and ill. Those things He did, they were a part of His proof perhaps, but more they were examples of compassion and an example of what we really can do, with faith. And, yes, miracles, literal real miracles, happen every day. Your next breath is a miracle, but a seemingly mundane one. There are absolutely scientifically and historically impossible things that happen so often believers know.
In any case, without those people I would potentially not be who I am and I certainly wouldn't know well nearly so well. Then again, that is only consciously. I know or believe enough to get me through what I don't know. In a way, I am grateful for fools of the lower orders. And still I hope for a day when only those who understand perfectly are allowed to roam freely. Or, I should say know and adhere, as I believe we all already know everything, only maintaining pieces of it consciously albeit. Everyone knows what is right and wrong on at least a minor scale. Many choose not to be right. Those are the ones I will have little sorrow for their lack of presence. Unlike some, however, I will let God sort it out.
This new terrorist, the story keeps changing. First he was a fundamentalist (Christian), conservative, anti-immigration, nationalist. At least two of those have been blown out of the water, as I suspected they would be. First, he is not a Christian, of any sort. Second, he is not a conservative. The Unibomber seems to be his main source. What it boils down to is that this man is a atheist national socialist. Uhrm, not exactly what is still being portrayed. As to his motives however, they are not that of a madman. His writings aren't even his. He is merely a man beset by changes he cannot control. I would say his actions, not his guilt, are free from that of the insane. I might even say due to the plight of his people, his guilt is questionable. I have some notion that this is just the beginning.
People in Europe are beyond wits ends dealing with governments that not only govern poorly but add insult to injury by bringing in foreigners they will not, perhaps cannot, control. Once enough people, there, get a taste of and for blood, there will be no stopping it. They sort of have a history of bloodletting. And if the government will not simply protect them, they will at first, like this man, do it themselves. Until enough people side with them publicly, and change the government. But populist swings in small nations can be terrible. They no longer depend on the Middle-East for oil, so they no longer need fear repercussions.
Right, wrong? In some cases there is so much wrong that there can't be right anywhere in the whole context to be found. The same can be said for America, which is reaching many boiling points as well. A mere 100 Republicans are holding the line. I think there is a collective holding of breath, waiting for this next election. But if things do not change, things will definitely change. I am just an observer, perhaps a survivor. I just write what the crystal ball is telling me. Governments need to step up and offer security or put it in the hands of the people and shut it. If they do not begin kicking out illegal aliens and figuring out how to do an enforceable guest worker program, they will find out just how tough it can really be. And it looks like their children may be the targets. Right? Wrong? What is genocide through "immigration reform"? Just a slower form of the same thing.
Crazy? Maybe. Maybe we all are, one way or another. I'm just making notes, analyzing, calculating, and preparing to hunker down until the storm passes. The left has had it's way for over a century now. It is time to begin the undoing. Financials to policies to... everything. It has begun.
Fried, cooked, beaten up.
.
.
A rough one today. Still, I crawled out from the sheets before I had planned, before the alarm. And I pushed to keep it that way. While not quite up to getting out and to town, I did call and speak with the guy. Seems I will merely be leaving it there anyway. What he had roughly suggested I had already tried. Then again, I don't have a Midas touch. Not with bike mechanics. Perhaps there is a 'sweet spot' and I don't have the tuning it takes to know. But if it is that touchy, I would guess using something to hold the hex in place would be advisable. Not the hard setters, just the lighter bolt holder treatments.
First full dose for some time. I realize, too, I forgot last nights medication. Bah, I guess today is a fresh start. I had better remember the potassium, I was rather low. I think I have been forgetting that. They have me on 80 for the next five days, then back down to 40. Plus they have me on double lasix for the same time period. It seems they don't want my bp to come down too much, but I think they overly worry about that. It is almost back to my "normals". Then again, between this and that... My foot has been shot out from under me regarding being more active, for example. When every time you put your foot down it hurts and feels like a large section of it is burning, you do so less often. But lowering my dosage wasn't great either.
My shoulders still feel like they have had a strong, perhaps severe, sunburn. It is better than what it was. Have you ever had a sunburn bad enough that it burned and the skin cracked? That is what those areas slightly outside and slightly above where my shoulder blades peak outward feel like, each area is about the size of a fully extended shoulder blade. The area of soreness around it covers from the base of my ribs up into my arms but ends at the neck, though the most severe of it is centered in those small areas mentioned above. I have no idea what would cause that. Going shirtless doesn't help. This has been going on for a week or slightly more now. I have zero clue about it. A side affect from cutting doses, started by going without medicine for several days? Some odd neurological issue? Whatever, I wish it would just do it's thing and go. Massaging and showering do nothing. Itching it, which seems called for at times, is as fun as itching a real sunburn (not at all, that is). Yet there are no marks, it isn't red, swollen, puffy... nothing. The skin IS sensitive. Just touching it in some of the area causes pain. Weird.
It is already getting pretty hot in this front room. So, I am going to retreat after just a bit more tinkering. Have a great day.
.
A rough one today. Still, I crawled out from the sheets before I had planned, before the alarm. And I pushed to keep it that way. While not quite up to getting out and to town, I did call and speak with the guy. Seems I will merely be leaving it there anyway. What he had roughly suggested I had already tried. Then again, I don't have a Midas touch. Not with bike mechanics. Perhaps there is a 'sweet spot' and I don't have the tuning it takes to know. But if it is that touchy, I would guess using something to hold the hex in place would be advisable. Not the hard setters, just the lighter bolt holder treatments.
First full dose for some time. I realize, too, I forgot last nights medication. Bah, I guess today is a fresh start. I had better remember the potassium, I was rather low. I think I have been forgetting that. They have me on 80 for the next five days, then back down to 40. Plus they have me on double lasix for the same time period. It seems they don't want my bp to come down too much, but I think they overly worry about that. It is almost back to my "normals". Then again, between this and that... My foot has been shot out from under me regarding being more active, for example. When every time you put your foot down it hurts and feels like a large section of it is burning, you do so less often. But lowering my dosage wasn't great either.
My shoulders still feel like they have had a strong, perhaps severe, sunburn. It is better than what it was. Have you ever had a sunburn bad enough that it burned and the skin cracked? That is what those areas slightly outside and slightly above where my shoulder blades peak outward feel like, each area is about the size of a fully extended shoulder blade. The area of soreness around it covers from the base of my ribs up into my arms but ends at the neck, though the most severe of it is centered in those small areas mentioned above. I have no idea what would cause that. Going shirtless doesn't help. This has been going on for a week or slightly more now. I have zero clue about it. A side affect from cutting doses, started by going without medicine for several days? Some odd neurological issue? Whatever, I wish it would just do it's thing and go. Massaging and showering do nothing. Itching it, which seems called for at times, is as fun as itching a real sunburn (not at all, that is). Yet there are no marks, it isn't red, swollen, puffy... nothing. The skin IS sensitive. Just touching it in some of the area causes pain. Weird.
It is already getting pretty hot in this front room. So, I am going to retreat after just a bit more tinkering. Have a great day.
No sleep.
.
.
I don't know if it is just the felt heat (can't tell if I am hot or the temps are up) or if staying up overnight triggered something. I just know that I can't sleep. I had been about to use the CPAP when I realized I don't have the water it needs. I was told to use distilled water, or to boil water for 20 minutes (I think). When I am in town getting my bike looked at I will pick up a bottle for now. Perhaps from then on I will simply boil and replace. I hate not being able to sleep, or even rest. I will try again shortly.
Oh, I realize we have a monsoon season here as well. The notion is still foreign to me. I just can't quite wrap my mind about being in the middle of a desert having weather I had always associated with, what, South Pacific Islands, India, or something? Humidity does go up, rain can come though it is very spotty, no deluges though. Then again, I think the highest I have seen humidity is in the 50% range. Not exactly wet air, like Iowa. Flash floods in the south of the state, and anywhere there are large elevation spikes, of course as well. But those happen almost any time it rains in those areas and off the beaten track.
I happened to take a vocabulary test, to see where I fit in (shamelessly stolen from Ace of Spades HQ). Terrible, I was in the middle of average. At one time I truly had a large vocabulary, of course when I read books. I averaged three books a week for much of my early life, not including comic books if those count. And the bible was a common read. And I didn't read my age-group type books which I generally despised. I generally read the classics, then into politics and history. Over a couple of decades, that is a lot of Twain, Poe, Dickens, and the rest. I really would love to have a kindle like device, both for cheap reading material, quick access, and some other things. I just don't like kindle, the ability to yank books (or even alter them), and some other things about that and other devices. There were about a dozen words I once knew, but since I couldn't recall now what they mean, I had to skip them. Nope, even including the words I used to know, my score is just at the higher end of average. Ah well.
Hmm, back to bed. Maybe if I lay really still, sleep will creep in and plug me in my glass jaw? It was happy to pick on me on my drive home! Bastage!
.
I don't know if it is just the felt heat (can't tell if I am hot or the temps are up) or if staying up overnight triggered something. I just know that I can't sleep. I had been about to use the CPAP when I realized I don't have the water it needs. I was told to use distilled water, or to boil water for 20 minutes (I think). When I am in town getting my bike looked at I will pick up a bottle for now. Perhaps from then on I will simply boil and replace. I hate not being able to sleep, or even rest. I will try again shortly.
Oh, I realize we have a monsoon season here as well. The notion is still foreign to me. I just can't quite wrap my mind about being in the middle of a desert having weather I had always associated with, what, South Pacific Islands, India, or something? Humidity does go up, rain can come though it is very spotty, no deluges though. Then again, I think the highest I have seen humidity is in the 50% range. Not exactly wet air, like Iowa. Flash floods in the south of the state, and anywhere there are large elevation spikes, of course as well. But those happen almost any time it rains in those areas and off the beaten track.
I happened to take a vocabulary test, to see where I fit in (shamelessly stolen from Ace of Spades HQ). Terrible, I was in the middle of average. At one time I truly had a large vocabulary, of course when I read books. I averaged three books a week for much of my early life, not including comic books if those count. And the bible was a common read. And I didn't read my age-group type books which I generally despised. I generally read the classics, then into politics and history. Over a couple of decades, that is a lot of Twain, Poe, Dickens, and the rest. I really would love to have a kindle like device, both for cheap reading material, quick access, and some other things. I just don't like kindle, the ability to yank books (or even alter them), and some other things about that and other devices. There were about a dozen words I once knew, but since I couldn't recall now what they mean, I had to skip them. Nope, even including the words I used to know, my score is just at the higher end of average. Ah well.
Hmm, back to bed. Maybe if I lay really still, sleep will creep in and plug me in my glass jaw? It was happy to pick on me on my drive home! Bastage!
That went well.
.
.
Nothing fancy, but I did set up my medicine for the next two weeks. Yes, yes, I checked it twice, give or take. I also figured out what the problem was with a couple of folding knives I have. They were almost dangerous to open, they would get stuck about half way. You see, there is a little hex nut that actually controls the... Yeah, I had to know that. Why didn't I figure it out? Then again, when I first got them, my tools were still in storage and I doubt if I had hex that small at the time. Further, when I have a problem from the past, I can get stuck in the notions surrounding it. Rather than looking for solutions, I just stick with "It's broke, nothing I can do!". Well, they are fixed.
Gee, I need to get to sleep but I'm not sure I can. Hmm, something small to eat. A heated brot? Sure. I need to get a bit more fruit. Cherries, apples, grapes, all good. I wonder if there is something else though? Ah, and more carrots. Dang but I have started to really enjoy peanut butter with carrots. Anywhile, good night.
.
Nothing fancy, but I did set up my medicine for the next two weeks. Yes, yes, I checked it twice, give or take. I also figured out what the problem was with a couple of folding knives I have. They were almost dangerous to open, they would get stuck about half way. You see, there is a little hex nut that actually controls the... Yeah, I had to know that. Why didn't I figure it out? Then again, when I first got them, my tools were still in storage and I doubt if I had hex that small at the time. Further, when I have a problem from the past, I can get stuck in the notions surrounding it. Rather than looking for solutions, I just stick with "It's broke, nothing I can do!". Well, they are fixed.
Gee, I need to get to sleep but I'm not sure I can. Hmm, something small to eat. A heated brot? Sure. I need to get a bit more fruit. Cherries, apples, grapes, all good. I wonder if there is something else though? Ah, and more carrots. Dang but I have started to really enjoy peanut butter with carrots. Anywhile, good night.
Monday, July 25, 2011
An easy, workable, trip.
.
.
I must be honest with you. I did not think I would make it to the doctors today. It had nothing to do with want. With medicine that seemingly is on the right track, I am more like a man dieing of thirst heading to water. The operative word is dieing. I've been tripping over myself for a week or two, more?, now. Even before I lowered the main medicine by need. In any case, it is back on track or will be tomorrow. They have added one more medicine, a light diuretic called spironolactone, to the mix. I'll tell you, the heart transplant specialists are high energy people. They get a little animated when you go off the reservation. It's almost worth tweaking meds just to get the 'treatment'. I love psychic massages. And angry women types. Some like Farris Wheels, sky diving, diving with sharks, whatever. I like short, high pitched, animated female type people, sue me. I got all the meds, reloaded a few things, and got out. I do rush, but those places are full of dieing people. And though it is said I am in a dieing condition it damn well doesn't look like it.
After that I went to the CPAP place. Set up was a breeze. It seems their is a humidifier on the machine. I hadn't actually even opened it up yet so I had no clue what was in there. I can see the reason for humidifier plainly. I can get a touch dry, mostly through the nasals though sometimes in the throat, at night. Actually though, it has been... quite some time since I woke up dry. I think it had to do with staying up too long and sleeping too long, and those things happening far too often. I met one of the techs who might visit my home. She seemed normal enough. I did not get to meet the other tech. I am told he is short, with gray hair, and has tattoos on his legs. That is all the description I have of him and it is not enough. I doubt if they legally could tell me if he is black. If it got back to him, he could probably sue. I will find out. There was something on her face when I asked what the guy looked like. What I read from that was that the most obvious characteristic she could not, would not say. She was totally unprepared for the question. I usually get the best answers, one way or another, that way. Anyway, that is set up.
Oh, the Lord knows, I loves me some flirting. No, this isn't moves and grooves. I have no real motives. Some women just... connect. It isn't innocent, not like a child. But it isn't guilty, either. It is a sweet few moments between two consenting adults who have a physical and chemical attraction. I guess, for me, that is as close to free love as I get these days. And it is the sweeter for it. Even it is rare. And not all flirts are equal. Today I had one of the finest flirts in a very long time. I would actually put that in my top 10, ever. And I flirt like girls blink. Most flirtation is like teaching a child to play tennis... hit or miss but the effort is good. Today? Wimbledon! I'm a happy man. Love? Certainly not money. Then again not zero either.
When I finished with the CPAP I was in a hurry home. I was absolutely done. All I could do was stay on the road and keep directions logged into the queue. Bushed, tired, fried, frazzled, exhausted. I had promised I would check the mail but I could not force myself to do that. I did get everything in from the vehicle, I then figured out how to undress. I did find the bed, I think. And it was lights out. I did not use the CPAP, I simply couldn't have figured it out even if I had wanted to stay up the extra few minutes to do so. *BAM* I have no real idea of what time it was, though I think I saw 14:00 and change. I woke at 21:00 and change, had a bit of food, blogged, fed the cats, and am about to set up my medsets. I may just tinker a bit and try to sleep again, this time with the CPAP.
Oh, I did mention that I was having problems with my foot. That getting out walking was... a problem. But only because they asked and I updated them on my bike, too. I didn't think they could do a consult. Lo and behold, they can, and did! Oh, I still walk like hell and fire are coming down on me or the Spirit is with me. I can move like the wind and blow smaller people off their feet going by. But I can probably walk on fire too. I just wouldn't do it long or often. That bottom of the foot callus is hellaciously painful to walk on. Something like a sharp pebble taped to the palm of my foot. It tears, it cuts, it burns. It really has been slowing me down, come to think of it. I don't think about it until I motate, then I remember why the HELL I HAVEN'T BEEN MOTATING! *youch*
Yes, the bicycle goes in tomorrow. I don't know how I will do it. I am setting both alarms, plus my phone. I will try to get back to bed before long, and I will push and shove to get up, out, and going. This, as I see it, is as vital as medicine. Perhaps it is even more important. As I fell down on meds, I fell down on this, and everything else, for a bit. But that doesn't mean I even took a break or retreated and I definitely didn't quit. I simply, as I said, fell down. I have been trying to get up the whole time this time. I can't fall down anymore. Not and just sit there.
Have you all died? Few posts, little interaction? Ah, right, summer is in full swing. Fine. Do have some fun, get some work done, keep at it. I'll manage until you need a break. A little jealous, and worried. Then again, Puff the Magic Dragon always wonders if Jackie Paper will ever come back. Am I real if he doesn't? Yes, it just wouldn't seem like it.
.
I must be honest with you. I did not think I would make it to the doctors today. It had nothing to do with want. With medicine that seemingly is on the right track, I am more like a man dieing of thirst heading to water. The operative word is dieing. I've been tripping over myself for a week or two, more?, now. Even before I lowered the main medicine by need. In any case, it is back on track or will be tomorrow. They have added one more medicine, a light diuretic called spironolactone, to the mix. I'll tell you, the heart transplant specialists are high energy people. They get a little animated when you go off the reservation. It's almost worth tweaking meds just to get the 'treatment'. I love psychic massages. And angry women types. Some like Farris Wheels, sky diving, diving with sharks, whatever. I like short, high pitched, animated female type people, sue me. I got all the meds, reloaded a few things, and got out. I do rush, but those places are full of dieing people. And though it is said I am in a dieing condition it damn well doesn't look like it.
After that I went to the CPAP place. Set up was a breeze. It seems their is a humidifier on the machine. I hadn't actually even opened it up yet so I had no clue what was in there. I can see the reason for humidifier plainly. I can get a touch dry, mostly through the nasals though sometimes in the throat, at night. Actually though, it has been... quite some time since I woke up dry. I think it had to do with staying up too long and sleeping too long, and those things happening far too often. I met one of the techs who might visit my home. She seemed normal enough. I did not get to meet the other tech. I am told he is short, with gray hair, and has tattoos on his legs. That is all the description I have of him and it is not enough. I doubt if they legally could tell me if he is black. If it got back to him, he could probably sue. I will find out. There was something on her face when I asked what the guy looked like. What I read from that was that the most obvious characteristic she could not, would not say. She was totally unprepared for the question. I usually get the best answers, one way or another, that way. Anyway, that is set up.
Oh, the Lord knows, I loves me some flirting. No, this isn't moves and grooves. I have no real motives. Some women just... connect. It isn't innocent, not like a child. But it isn't guilty, either. It is a sweet few moments between two consenting adults who have a physical and chemical attraction. I guess, for me, that is as close to free love as I get these days. And it is the sweeter for it. Even it is rare. And not all flirts are equal. Today I had one of the finest flirts in a very long time. I would actually put that in my top 10, ever. And I flirt like girls blink. Most flirtation is like teaching a child to play tennis... hit or miss but the effort is good. Today? Wimbledon! I'm a happy man. Love? Certainly not money. Then again not zero either.
When I finished with the CPAP I was in a hurry home. I was absolutely done. All I could do was stay on the road and keep directions logged into the queue. Bushed, tired, fried, frazzled, exhausted. I had promised I would check the mail but I could not force myself to do that. I did get everything in from the vehicle, I then figured out how to undress. I did find the bed, I think. And it was lights out. I did not use the CPAP, I simply couldn't have figured it out even if I had wanted to stay up the extra few minutes to do so. *BAM* I have no real idea of what time it was, though I think I saw 14:00 and change. I woke at 21:00 and change, had a bit of food, blogged, fed the cats, and am about to set up my medsets. I may just tinker a bit and try to sleep again, this time with the CPAP.
Oh, I did mention that I was having problems with my foot. That getting out walking was... a problem. But only because they asked and I updated them on my bike, too. I didn't think they could do a consult. Lo and behold, they can, and did! Oh, I still walk like hell and fire are coming down on me or the Spirit is with me. I can move like the wind and blow smaller people off their feet going by. But I can probably walk on fire too. I just wouldn't do it long or often. That bottom of the foot callus is hellaciously painful to walk on. Something like a sharp pebble taped to the palm of my foot. It tears, it cuts, it burns. It really has been slowing me down, come to think of it. I don't think about it until I motate, then I remember why the HELL I HAVEN'T BEEN MOTATING! *youch*
Yes, the bicycle goes in tomorrow. I don't know how I will do it. I am setting both alarms, plus my phone. I will try to get back to bed before long, and I will push and shove to get up, out, and going. This, as I see it, is as vital as medicine. Perhaps it is even more important. As I fell down on meds, I fell down on this, and everything else, for a bit. But that doesn't mean I even took a break or retreated and I definitely didn't quit. I simply, as I said, fell down. I have been trying to get up the whole time this time. I can't fall down anymore. Not and just sit there.
Have you all died? Few posts, little interaction? Ah, right, summer is in full swing. Fine. Do have some fun, get some work done, keep at it. I'll manage until you need a break. A little jealous, and worried. Then again, Puff the Magic Dragon always wonders if Jackie Paper will ever come back. Am I real if he doesn't? Yes, it just wouldn't seem like it.
A quiet but functioning night.
.
.
I have made it through the rough part of staying awake. And I did clear out one of the areas that had bottle-necked in my sudden crash. My bedroom is looking much more open. I sorted and stored a number of boxes and laundry baskets of clean close while sorting dirty close, putting those separate piles in their own baskets, and taking those to the laundry area. I couldn't do much, or fast, just enough to keep the fires lit as I knew I would not wake up if I slept. And I NEED to get in there. I have been taking my medicine, but perhaps not properly. I was low on one medicine but was tinkering with another, possibly foolishly. Or, maybe, my health simply cycles no matter what I do. But this has been a rougher downside. Oh, and I will be having the CPAP set up today after my other appointments. I really do hate going to the doctors. At least I can drive myself though.
I still have to get the cat litter policed and the trash out. Then a shower, a shave, brushing my teeth, and be out by 6:00. Ugh, only an hour to go. I do love driving in the morning though, when it is cool. I just wish fewer bikers (bicycle type) hit the road early. They are difficult to spot and most either have no lights or what they have doesn't work well. I simply do not understand taking that kind of risk, especially while riding very expensive bikes. I guess I just don't understand. Even though I am grumpy about being slowed down, I wouldn't hurt them on purpose. But it can be awfully difficult to even see them that early and still half asleep.
Well, on to the rest of what I need to do to get going. Have a great day! Drive safely, as much as possible, should you need to go out. Auf Wiederschreibensehen. (don't look that up, I think I made it up)
.
I have made it through the rough part of staying awake. And I did clear out one of the areas that had bottle-necked in my sudden crash. My bedroom is looking much more open. I sorted and stored a number of boxes and laundry baskets of clean close while sorting dirty close, putting those separate piles in their own baskets, and taking those to the laundry area. I couldn't do much, or fast, just enough to keep the fires lit as I knew I would not wake up if I slept. And I NEED to get in there. I have been taking my medicine, but perhaps not properly. I was low on one medicine but was tinkering with another, possibly foolishly. Or, maybe, my health simply cycles no matter what I do. But this has been a rougher downside. Oh, and I will be having the CPAP set up today after my other appointments. I really do hate going to the doctors. At least I can drive myself though.
I still have to get the cat litter policed and the trash out. Then a shower, a shave, brushing my teeth, and be out by 6:00. Ugh, only an hour to go. I do love driving in the morning though, when it is cool. I just wish fewer bikers (bicycle type) hit the road early. They are difficult to spot and most either have no lights or what they have doesn't work well. I simply do not understand taking that kind of risk, especially while riding very expensive bikes. I guess I just don't understand. Even though I am grumpy about being slowed down, I wouldn't hurt them on purpose. But it can be awfully difficult to even see them that early and still half asleep.
Well, on to the rest of what I need to do to get going. Have a great day! Drive safely, as much as possible, should you need to go out. Auf Wiederschreibensehen. (don't look that up, I think I made it up)
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Mind-fu? Could be.
.
.
I keep tinkering with the design programs I have. The most promising one does have a method of writing into the design, but it is quite weak. It might have something to do with how I am attempting to scale things, though, so I may try to tweak that a bit. I am learning, but given that the company will not put out tutorials as those are a gifts for ponying up and paying for their mainline program "pro" version, the learning curve is rather steep. I am sure I have tinkered with AutoCAD at the university but I didn't get far there, either. While they may or may not have had a tutorial or dozen, hundred(?), I simply didn't have the time or a solid reason to devote more than moments tinkering. I am stuck, at this point, in trying to take a pair of concentric circles, what will be the building blocks for tires, and turning them to place them on the shaft that will become my axle. Never mind, I am working on it.
At Helen's, there is a discussion regarding how much men, compared to women, do around the house. I initially just spoofed a response. But after reading enough other responses, I had to suggest that men shouldn't be even discussing how much they do around the house. The home, classically, tribally, and in all other forms of history, has been a thing of the woman. It is her's to dress up, it is her's to manage, it is her's to clean. So I made it quite clear that I can't believe so many of the men there were just groveling to jump on the "Oh, I do so much, more even" bandwagon that I had to question the masculinity in the discussion. Beta at best, what gamma? at worst. I had to ask if marriage castrates men or if the particular group there is just hen-pecked and weak or liberal. I suggested they were debating feminism about as well as Boehner is debating the Democrats. At that pace, they might as well surrender and start sitting to pee, taking crumpets with their tea (which they will serve), and start wearing "man" aprons. Bah!
In another discussion, I suggested that most of the women I have known have been rather narcissistic, if allowed the lead. Which I most certainly do not. A strong male presence seems to tamp the natural inclinations of a woman, to keep her in check. Like it or not, it has worked for me like a charm. Still not married, but there is more to that than meets the eye as well. I certainly wasn't sure I wanted to marry. I picked women who... didn't really have those instincts or could be kept by mere promise. Well, for most of my 'career'. Earlier on, if I hadn't been moving around so much, I might have done just that, gotten married. Thank you Navy. Seriously, after finding out how high the divorce rate is in the service, I was quite happy not to have gotten in too deep.
No, I think most women are as I suggest, most modern women. And, yes, a strong male presence and some solid competition to make the score clear, plus some excellent sack time keeps the thing manageable. It's always there, waiting to sneak out. Just like my one-eyed friend. Ha! Now, maybe most women really aren't like that when they are natural and normal (though I think it is probably only a milder form). But when women are either fixed (hysterectomy) or on the pill, I think that is when the monsters that they really are come into full bloom. Yes, that is my bet. And I will lay my arm to your head on the chopping block awaiting proof. Looser splats.
I have again started reading, in my prelude to studying economics. "What is Wrong with the World", by Chesterton. And yes, I am trying to read some of it out loud, as I had suggested. Don't read it! If you don't want to know that we are facing merely an advanced group of the same type of people he was naming and decrying. Oh they have gotten there way and come a long way from his time, but it is the very same group of people, the same poorly devised policies, the same corruption. Only now they have the worst of the least in the presidency of the most powerful nation on earth, or... what used to be, could be, should be. Wonderful reading. If you have never read him, just imagine me, only smart, clever, good with words, and slightly more diplomatic (if not quite in a politically correct manner). Or, that is how I see things.
Tonight was meat night! I had been thawing the meats in the fridge. Whether because of the dry climate, higher heat, or relatively cooler house (no, cause it happens in the winter too), I can't get things to thaw in the refrigerator. I have to take them out. No, no, I keep the reefer just right, so veggies and milk neither freeze nor even frost, even when veggies aren't in the bins. I really wonder if it is the arid nature of the region? In any case, brots and beef ribs on the bone were in the offing. Absolutely fantastic foods. I keep overdoing the brots. They seem to be very tricky though. Two cooking cycles is too little, three is too much. I keep working on it, and have it down to that point. Next time I will try splitting the difference. The beef ribs were perfect, they go four cooking cycles, one cycle on each side. Nummm!
I have to be going very early in the morning. And I must admit I am sweating it. I might try to tear into things and make it an all-nighter. I simply do not think I can get up early. I haven't been able to for days, my wake time has steadily climbed into the early afternoon. *BAM* No choice. Oh, I have awaken at 9:00 several mornings. I had zero capacity to do more than go right back to sleep. The alarm does nothing, often I haven't even been hearing it. Or I wake way late only to realize I must have shut it off. Heck no, that doesn't mean I am quitting. It only means I'm in a funk. So I have to consider that when trying to make plans.
Hmm, more ribs! Later.
.
I keep tinkering with the design programs I have. The most promising one does have a method of writing into the design, but it is quite weak. It might have something to do with how I am attempting to scale things, though, so I may try to tweak that a bit. I am learning, but given that the company will not put out tutorials as those are a gifts for ponying up and paying for their mainline program "pro" version, the learning curve is rather steep. I am sure I have tinkered with AutoCAD at the university but I didn't get far there, either. While they may or may not have had a tutorial or dozen, hundred(?), I simply didn't have the time or a solid reason to devote more than moments tinkering. I am stuck, at this point, in trying to take a pair of concentric circles, what will be the building blocks for tires, and turning them to place them on the shaft that will become my axle. Never mind, I am working on it.
At Helen's, there is a discussion regarding how much men, compared to women, do around the house. I initially just spoofed a response. But after reading enough other responses, I had to suggest that men shouldn't be even discussing how much they do around the house. The home, classically, tribally, and in all other forms of history, has been a thing of the woman. It is her's to dress up, it is her's to manage, it is her's to clean. So I made it quite clear that I can't believe so many of the men there were just groveling to jump on the "Oh, I do so much, more even" bandwagon that I had to question the masculinity in the discussion. Beta at best, what gamma? at worst. I had to ask if marriage castrates men or if the particular group there is just hen-pecked and weak or liberal. I suggested they were debating feminism about as well as Boehner is debating the Democrats. At that pace, they might as well surrender and start sitting to pee, taking crumpets with their tea (which they will serve), and start wearing "man" aprons. Bah!
In another discussion, I suggested that most of the women I have known have been rather narcissistic, if allowed the lead. Which I most certainly do not. A strong male presence seems to tamp the natural inclinations of a woman, to keep her in check. Like it or not, it has worked for me like a charm. Still not married, but there is more to that than meets the eye as well. I certainly wasn't sure I wanted to marry. I picked women who... didn't really have those instincts or could be kept by mere promise. Well, for most of my 'career'. Earlier on, if I hadn't been moving around so much, I might have done just that, gotten married. Thank you Navy. Seriously, after finding out how high the divorce rate is in the service, I was quite happy not to have gotten in too deep.
No, I think most women are as I suggest, most modern women. And, yes, a strong male presence and some solid competition to make the score clear, plus some excellent sack time keeps the thing manageable. It's always there, waiting to sneak out. Just like my one-eyed friend. Ha! Now, maybe most women really aren't like that when they are natural and normal (though I think it is probably only a milder form). But when women are either fixed (hysterectomy) or on the pill, I think that is when the monsters that they really are come into full bloom. Yes, that is my bet. And I will lay my arm to your head on the chopping block awaiting proof. Looser splats.
I have again started reading, in my prelude to studying economics. "What is Wrong with the World", by Chesterton. And yes, I am trying to read some of it out loud, as I had suggested. Don't read it! If you don't want to know that we are facing merely an advanced group of the same type of people he was naming and decrying. Oh they have gotten there way and come a long way from his time, but it is the very same group of people, the same poorly devised policies, the same corruption. Only now they have the worst of the least in the presidency of the most powerful nation on earth, or... what used to be, could be, should be. Wonderful reading. If you have never read him, just imagine me, only smart, clever, good with words, and slightly more diplomatic (if not quite in a politically correct manner). Or, that is how I see things.
Tonight was meat night! I had been thawing the meats in the fridge. Whether because of the dry climate, higher heat, or relatively cooler house (no, cause it happens in the winter too), I can't get things to thaw in the refrigerator. I have to take them out. No, no, I keep the reefer just right, so veggies and milk neither freeze nor even frost, even when veggies aren't in the bins. I really wonder if it is the arid nature of the region? In any case, brots and beef ribs on the bone were in the offing. Absolutely fantastic foods. I keep overdoing the brots. They seem to be very tricky though. Two cooking cycles is too little, three is too much. I keep working on it, and have it down to that point. Next time I will try splitting the difference. The beef ribs were perfect, they go four cooking cycles, one cycle on each side. Nummm!
I have to be going very early in the morning. And I must admit I am sweating it. I might try to tear into things and make it an all-nighter. I simply do not think I can get up early. I haven't been able to for days, my wake time has steadily climbed into the early afternoon. *BAM* No choice. Oh, I have awaken at 9:00 several mornings. I had zero capacity to do more than go right back to sleep. The alarm does nothing, often I haven't even been hearing it. Or I wake way late only to realize I must have shut it off. Heck no, that doesn't mean I am quitting. It only means I'm in a funk. So I have to consider that when trying to make plans.
Hmm, more ribs! Later.
Some thoughts.
.
.
The West is dying. Multiculturalism is one of the diseases. Some will quibble, those who have some sort of agreement, that multiculturalism is merely a symptom. That debate, while reasonable, is not the crux of today's thoughts. The question is, how will and how should multiculturalism be handled. There are many ways to deal with it. Most will seem draconian in modern parlance. Sentiment, mood, and common thought have been poisoned by those who support egalitarianism and the rest of that. Most people have had this idea crammed into their forced integration minds beyond what their own eyes tell them. They believe even though they know it is not true.
Segregation, as I mentioned the other day, is gaining steam. Not a lot of steam, and it hasn't gone mainstream. But all it will take is a match. Something I realize is that segregation is not a functional means of dealing with the situation over the long term. It is no more a solid answer than what we have today, though it could be a functional short term political and social device in resetting the world as we know it. And, yes, it can be done. It would require, most likely, marshal law. There are always... questions... about martial law. But again, this is not the main crux of the notion. Nor is it required for a solid, workable, long term solution.
The solution I propose is to use the laws of those who do not adhere to Western methods and laws on them, though not in their way, but ours. For example, sharia law places non-muslims into a second class citizenship. Neither are they fully protected by the law nor are they allowed to participate in the laws, some business potential, or government either through voting or holding office. What I propose, for muslims, is that they be held to the same situation, though it be based on whether they are Christian since that is the local majority. All of sharia laws would bind muslims in America but be based on our norms and customs. It would be giving them their cake and us eating it. For Europeans, I suppose it would have to be based on atheism, socialism, or some such.
How long would that stay as an active part of our legal system? As long as we have people living here in large number who wish to subvert our systems. Any group, socialists, communists, atheists, who chooses to change our system to their system would be held to their ideals. People would get to choose... American or something else first. If they choose something else first, our laws would accommodate their lifestyle. You are a socialist, you say? Then you have no property rights and would be taxed according to socialist national averages, for example.
Oh, it would never fly. But that isn't always the point. It WOULD work, but then when has our government ever done anything that does work? Other than, of course, what is good enough for government work.
.
The West is dying. Multiculturalism is one of the diseases. Some will quibble, those who have some sort of agreement, that multiculturalism is merely a symptom. That debate, while reasonable, is not the crux of today's thoughts. The question is, how will and how should multiculturalism be handled. There are many ways to deal with it. Most will seem draconian in modern parlance. Sentiment, mood, and common thought have been poisoned by those who support egalitarianism and the rest of that. Most people have had this idea crammed into their forced integration minds beyond what their own eyes tell them. They believe even though they know it is not true.
Segregation, as I mentioned the other day, is gaining steam. Not a lot of steam, and it hasn't gone mainstream. But all it will take is a match. Something I realize is that segregation is not a functional means of dealing with the situation over the long term. It is no more a solid answer than what we have today, though it could be a functional short term political and social device in resetting the world as we know it. And, yes, it can be done. It would require, most likely, marshal law. There are always... questions... about martial law. But again, this is not the main crux of the notion. Nor is it required for a solid, workable, long term solution.
The solution I propose is to use the laws of those who do not adhere to Western methods and laws on them, though not in their way, but ours. For example, sharia law places non-muslims into a second class citizenship. Neither are they fully protected by the law nor are they allowed to participate in the laws, some business potential, or government either through voting or holding office. What I propose, for muslims, is that they be held to the same situation, though it be based on whether they are Christian since that is the local majority. All of sharia laws would bind muslims in America but be based on our norms and customs. It would be giving them their cake and us eating it. For Europeans, I suppose it would have to be based on atheism, socialism, or some such.
How long would that stay as an active part of our legal system? As long as we have people living here in large number who wish to subvert our systems. Any group, socialists, communists, atheists, who chooses to change our system to their system would be held to their ideals. People would get to choose... American or something else first. If they choose something else first, our laws would accommodate their lifestyle. You are a socialist, you say? Then you have no property rights and would be taxed according to socialist national averages, for example.
Oh, it would never fly. But that isn't always the point. It WOULD work, but then when has our government ever done anything that does work? Other than, of course, what is good enough for government work.
Interesting things, at least to me.
.
.
I've been looking over goats, again. It seems you probably can't have milk goats that are good for meat. What you can do is have a full blood meat buck and milk does. The offspring, needed to induce milk production anyway, will then be at least half of a good meat stock and so useful for that. Of course, the process of turning a kid into dinner is no small task. Many people who think about it don't realize you probably wouldn't be able to do it all in a day. The first part, killing, bleeding, skinning, and gutting would be one days work. You could get fast enough to do this in, say, a few minutes. But the meat then needs to cool slowly, over at least a day but preferably several days. Then you have to part the meat. I have done this with a deer. I did a poor job of it, but good enough to get the meat processed after I got it off the bones. It was about the same size as a large goat, and from what I have seen, the process is exactly the same. A lot of work, but it would definitely be worth it.
While considering goats in general, I looked through various articles regarding goat milk. If I had, say, two milking does, that would offer anywhere from a gallon to six gallons a day! A bit much for even my milk loving ways. But there are other things you can do with goat milk. Cheeses, butter, ice cream, yogurt, take your pick. All of it would have to be for home consumption, mind you. I don't know what the regulations are for milk sales, but for meat it has to be USDA inspected before it can be sold. And, really, they only do that at slaughterhouses. They actually inspect while the animal is being butchered, which means a small group of butchers at a time simply wouldn't draw them to inspect. For sales I would have to find a commercial butcher who would accept a contract. For milk? Cheese? Anything edible? No idea, so far. My guess is it would be a nightmare. But the soap I could sell, if I could find an outlet. Just thinking. I am not really interested in going commercial, I would merely be interested in breaking even beyond the meat and milk production cost versus expense. Yes, a free lunch would be nice. Or, as free as lunches get. It might not truly be possible though, due to regulations.
The more I think of this, the more likely I am, should I survive long, that I will eventually have goats. Nubian does for milk and a Boer buck for the meat side of it. Though I don't know if such a large male would cause problems for the does. Things to consider over time. Those bucks are large, in the 240-300 pound range. That's my size! The nubian does are large, but still 65 pounds lighter than Boer. Hmm, perhaps a mostly nubian mixed with boer doe? Just thinking.
I've been looking over other design programs. The only thing of any real use for my purposes is free, but only for a month. Then the price goes way up. AutoCAD is offered for a month of free use. After that it is, if I recall rightly, passed $3k and nearly into $4k, before taxes, title, fees, and whatever else Uncle Sam is calling the robbery these days. I keep looking for something useful and free. It seems most of them either don't actually allow writing or measurements to be put into the designs, or it just isn't working on my machine. I may simply have to do this old school. Yeah, I know, probably a silly project. But it is something somewhat like engineering. And, yes, I do like doing that stuff. I would love to put my home and outbuildings into design programs, and tinker with them there, too. I r a nerd, sort of. I guess I want to be a nerd. (I've literally been chastised by women for calling myself a nerd. Good looking women too. Sometimes I am clueless... or is it a trick?) No, I am clueless. It just doesn't seem to matter though.
Good night.
.
I've been looking over goats, again. It seems you probably can't have milk goats that are good for meat. What you can do is have a full blood meat buck and milk does. The offspring, needed to induce milk production anyway, will then be at least half of a good meat stock and so useful for that. Of course, the process of turning a kid into dinner is no small task. Many people who think about it don't realize you probably wouldn't be able to do it all in a day. The first part, killing, bleeding, skinning, and gutting would be one days work. You could get fast enough to do this in, say, a few minutes. But the meat then needs to cool slowly, over at least a day but preferably several days. Then you have to part the meat. I have done this with a deer. I did a poor job of it, but good enough to get the meat processed after I got it off the bones. It was about the same size as a large goat, and from what I have seen, the process is exactly the same. A lot of work, but it would definitely be worth it.
While considering goats in general, I looked through various articles regarding goat milk. If I had, say, two milking does, that would offer anywhere from a gallon to six gallons a day! A bit much for even my milk loving ways. But there are other things you can do with goat milk. Cheeses, butter, ice cream, yogurt, take your pick. All of it would have to be for home consumption, mind you. I don't know what the regulations are for milk sales, but for meat it has to be USDA inspected before it can be sold. And, really, they only do that at slaughterhouses. They actually inspect while the animal is being butchered, which means a small group of butchers at a time simply wouldn't draw them to inspect. For sales I would have to find a commercial butcher who would accept a contract. For milk? Cheese? Anything edible? No idea, so far. My guess is it would be a nightmare. But the soap I could sell, if I could find an outlet. Just thinking. I am not really interested in going commercial, I would merely be interested in breaking even beyond the meat and milk production cost versus expense. Yes, a free lunch would be nice. Or, as free as lunches get. It might not truly be possible though, due to regulations.
The more I think of this, the more likely I am, should I survive long, that I will eventually have goats. Nubian does for milk and a Boer buck for the meat side of it. Though I don't know if such a large male would cause problems for the does. Things to consider over time. Those bucks are large, in the 240-300 pound range. That's my size! The nubian does are large, but still 65 pounds lighter than Boer. Hmm, perhaps a mostly nubian mixed with boer doe? Just thinking.
I've been looking over other design programs. The only thing of any real use for my purposes is free, but only for a month. Then the price goes way up. AutoCAD is offered for a month of free use. After that it is, if I recall rightly, passed $3k and nearly into $4k, before taxes, title, fees, and whatever else Uncle Sam is calling the robbery these days. I keep looking for something useful and free. It seems most of them either don't actually allow writing or measurements to be put into the designs, or it just isn't working on my machine. I may simply have to do this old school. Yeah, I know, probably a silly project. But it is something somewhat like engineering. And, yes, I do like doing that stuff. I would love to put my home and outbuildings into design programs, and tinker with them there, too. I r a nerd, sort of. I guess I want to be a nerd. (I've literally been chastised by women for calling myself a nerd. Good looking women too. Sometimes I am clueless... or is it a trick?) No, I am clueless. It just doesn't seem to matter though.
Good night.
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