A few things before I crash.

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I really wanted to just go to bed.  But a few unusual once in a rare while tasks were on my mind.  With the dishes done, everything was open.  As I finish, or swiss?  Anyway, as I danish, it all remains open.  I don't remember the first chore?  The next was setting spelt to sprout.  In my zeal I forgot to weigh it.  If you weigh it before sprouting, you can use that weight to see if the grain is dry enough.  A dry sprouted grain will weigh the same if hydration is the same (or so it has been stipulated).

Hmm?  Oh.  Another jar of sprouts, of similar volume, weighed.  Separated on different trays.  When the weighed wheat equals itself, the other grains should be done.  Problem...  Solved...  And, done.  Remember, kiddies, do not become my problem.  Done and done.

Then I grabbed one of the superpails of oats and white winter wheat.  They needed washed, as did the easy-open lids and lid opener.  I'll know if those are water resistant soon enough.  I may spray off the soap more in a bit.  I won't open them until fully dry, so best give them the rinse before I crash.  Ever get the feeling you have used too much soap?  Shut up.  :p

An appointment.

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To bed at 6:30, to be up by 10:00.  Didn't like it, no choice.  SSA required the visit, missed the first if half because they work in squirrelly ways, in off hours, even days, without a regular place of business, and without a local number.  Really?  Anyway, I did make it.  Usually doctor equipment is wrong, the worse way.  When they work for the government it seems it is wrong the other way.  The scales were twenty pounds shy, and I'll wager the bp cup was fifty to seventy points shy.  Whatever, made it and done.

The drive was good.  A perfect winter day.  Clear sky, sunsmiles, clear roads, and weekend drivers (with it's pluses and minuses).  All in all just a good day to be out, even if still wanting, needing to be, in bed.  I did feed the girls before leaving.  Yeah, they hold grudges, more softly these days.  I believe it is bedtime again.  Oh, well, after stirring the sourdoughs, and cooling down from the trip.  Later.

Oh, right. The other kefir.

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Water kefir.  It has been sitting a bit long.  I was worried I might have killed it.  Not so.  Two half gallon jugs had to be rotated.  Further, this time I put the flat but non-sweet soda, after adding some sugar to feed the smaller bacteria and yeasts something to eat to create fizz, into flip-top sealed bottles.  After accounting for grains, I got three bottles per half gallon.  The grains seem to be doing well.

Two days, then they need to be chilled so the don't pop as champagne, even to destroying the bottle.  Uhrm, again, if it works.  It may simply not be warm enough.  I added vanilla extract and ginger.  The last attempts at this produced no fizz, if the jars weren't airtight.  Quite a bit more work than it seems, or at least it sure eats the time.

I have cleaned up from that.  It is bedtime.  The bathroom and shower just have to wait. This was overdue a bit.  Gotta keep the cultures alive.  Good night.

Kefir, mostly.

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Well.  I had a lot more kefir in there then I thought.  Some  of it was just mixed, no larger pieces.  But taking my time I was able to find eight larger bits.  Meaning to sort those into specific marked jars, I messed up.  I did get half of them were I know they are.  Probably.  I had a few dishes before, but a bunch of jars and lids, then tools at the end.

I still have dishes.  The kefir has been mixed and set to sour.  Some of it, it is hoped, will produce whey. It's a messy job.  I only hope it works out.  Though, even if I don't get the big clumps I want, I know that clumpier kefir can be used as starter for the next round of kefir, it just isn't as cool.  And it really doesn't go bad, if I will dump if it gets to a certain point.  More because I have enough backup and I don't want to waste milk on several reset cycles.

The kefir was a lot more than I thought.  I am not even done... more dishes.  I am hoping to hit that soon enough, clean the bathroom, take a shower and call it a night.  I've done enough for a bit.  And, if I get these things done, the kitchen table, then floor, are the next events.  I'll just sweep the bathroom, saving mopping for when I hit the kitchen too.

Hmm.  Food.  I am hungry.  I'd best thaw something, several packs of meat.  Need to go to the store too.  Just a few veggies, maybe fruit.  I'm just not sure what to eat tonight.  Sardines?  I don't know.  That might be about it.  Later.

Awake again.

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Been awake for an hour or two.  Barely tinkering.  Did the dishes, then pulled kefir.  That will be sorted shortly.  Strained, sorted, reset, some consumed, and then dishes again.  Then I'll hit the sourdoughs.  And, finally back to regular housecleaning, starting with the bathroom and then back to the kitchen, with minor efforts, sorting, in the living room on breaks.

I have figured a few things out with hands, glove, dishes, aloe vera, and powder.  If I am going to be doing a lot of dishes, even with gloves, I need to slather aloe vera three to four times a day.  Don't do dishes without gloves.  Period.  As to powder, talc, I've tried two ways: first way was to pile it in the glove, the better way is to lightly dust hands first.  When piling it in, every time I remove the gloves I powder the area, my hands and arms are coated, and the powder begins to clump from sweat or water just finding it's way in, meaning a lot of waste.  The other way may require occasional reapplication for longer sessions, but I have to drain and refresh the water anyway from time to time.

One would think the world all common sense.  Try using linear thinking and a 2d map, without uncommon thinking to get anywhere in the x, y, z area of this planet,  even given the earth's crust as an assist.  That is just transportation, not including which factors are preferred, time to destination, fuel use (even if walking, you use fuel), velocity allowed or at a limited pace, and others.  Actually, most people are limited to premade paths, roads, and 2d maps.  And many can't use those well.  So it is with everything... including dishes, hands, hot water and all.

I am finding, as I get better (definitely getting better, if perhaps as I speed toward death oddly, or I wouldn't be doing all I am doing... even if fumblingly), it is better to invest time figuring things out.  Even the little processes, and how to cope when the main tricks and methods aren't available.  With dishes?  Working without gloves might require much cooler water and a lot more hand lotion, maybe several types.  Or prepare to just deal with dry, cracked to bleeding hands, or eating off dirty dishes.  In  any case, my life is becoming a system of systems.  Each first simply ingrained on it's own, then integrated into other systems.  Alterations and compromises are constant annoyances, if opportunities to learn.  Learning may not be always favored.  But it is a potentially valuable opportunity.

So much in life to do.  So few can do much.  How sad.  If four are pointing back at me.  Yes, I get it.  I am on the bandwagon to learn, experiment, do.  Be creative.

I did what I could.

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I eventually crashed so hard I am wondering if a giant impression of the hand of last week is imprinted on my face.  Down sometime after 6:00.  How much after God alone might know.  I should have been to bed by 4:00, perhaps 2:00 if memory serves, if I won't swear to that as a truth.  Could look back, but I can't read.  Not yet.  Only awake to deal finally with the mortgage company.

Something is very wrong with them.  I definitely paid my bill twice this month, have been up to date for months, was told I didn't have to pay next month... the call was telling me I was in arears with the old loan.  Which, if you'll have to trust me, I wasn't.  Either hidden fees in there, or they accounted the overpayment into the package, or some other mistake on their side.  I had it, worth the cost, just hate dealing with people who don't know what they are doing, or worse do but aren't playing fair, right, or honest.  This guy was just the collecter.  At this point he knows or cares about nothing except a ledger imbalance.  He couldn't and wouldn't have, or probably been able to fix anything.  Yeah.  But done.

If I can settle a bit, perhaps back to bed.  I can't remember what was done, what remains, in the house.  Did well until I got stuck on doing nothing.  Then just kept hoping I would... do.  No "do" left.  Then I crashed so hard I now have a metaphorical understanding of mosquitoes and windshields.  I am surprised I woke for the call, even with my mind set to facilitate.  There are limits.

Good night, again.  I hope.

Such strange thoughts.

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Even so, music is crafted to fit.

No complaints.

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Took a bit to get started.  I wondered if it was too late to place the second call.  Then I realized there was no cost for failure.  Not too late.  Doubts were allayed via several varied communication devices and techniques.  She never said it.  With some it is not necessary.  'Are you doubting me?'  I almost said "Yes.", but that... can cause... dissonance.  Let them remain blissful.

After, I eventually hit dishes.  Several loads, several fresh pans.  More because the water got cold or dirty as I did the items piecemeal, and between other tasks.  The packing, and all other house trash was sorted and taken out.  I was surprised it all fit.  The counters were cleaned.  I also washed and removed the toaster oven for now.  I'll fit that in with one of the kitchen carts... which reminds me...

I've done a goodly bit of work out there, with much more to do still.  I need to feed the sourdoughs, mess with the kefir, deal with paper packing, move a few items for soap making to what is becoming that work station, and finish a few dishes, plus what is generated in processing kefir.  Ugh.

As I worked on boxes I have also been clearing the living room.  Sorting cd's, dvd's and mostly blurays, and games.  Well, and books, tools, parts, and paperwork.  Ackh.  On breaks, more of that.  I'd like to set up a cd/bluray/dvd/game shelf.  If first I need a place for it.  Yeah.  Then a proper shelf system for electronica, which I do have.  I tried a... mix of things, on the cheap.  It works, mostly.  But even I know better.  I've got the gooder(tm) things, it's making space, finding the time, and having the energy.  I am getting there.

I went looking for emmer, another ancient grain(?).  Wanting whole berries I ran into this being called farro.  Okay, so, digging with both names... I ended back... at einkorn.  So, at the product (one of several, but a more popular one), I explained my confusion, then had to ask... is einhorn really finkle?  Not sure if organo-heads will get it.  Even if the actor went totally stupid left, he'll never be accepted.  Now he has burned all bridges to his fan base.  Still, someone might get a kick.

The bathroom to, if... when... I can.  I might be done or end up getting most of it done.  Love it when I can, even if limited to women's work.  At least I don't have to beg muscle.  Bleh.  Later or much later.

Everything.

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Maybe a few extras.  How the bowl and spoon were overlooked?  Too tired.  A good run.  Of the boxes only packing remains.  The paper will be saved.  The plastic needs simply to be put in the inner tall trash can.  Amazing how much room that ends up using.  Then, with the jars fully dry, I'll put those in the boxes they were bought and came in, upsidedown, then store them in the carts or wire shelving.  THEN I'll be caught up to begin catching up.  The bathroom will be hit first, then back to the kitchen.

Okay, I forgot countertops.  Those will be hit while the other minor kitchen jobs are being done.  Might as well wash the spoon and bowl while at it.  I'll need hot soapy for washing up.  Should eat something before long, would hate to turn into a domestic troll.  Oh, yes, there are rare male versions of that monster.  Just unfed normals of unusual size.  And, yes, when people, or trolls or even potential trolls, are busy, we can forget to eat.  A lot.  These last four to seven days, often I have had less than 500 to 1000 calories.  Not bad, sometimes.  Not good long term or regular.  Fasting, but more accidental.  Without someone else around to feed or who eats, it's easy to truly just forget.  That will lead to either malnutrition or eventual overconsumption.

Whatevs, for now.  Things to do.  No places to go, for now.  Didn't receive a call back, not sure what that was about.  An appointment soon, if something seems odd about that.  I should call to check up on that.  As to work, today, I'll get to it when I get to it.  I've been up a few hours, if that doesn't mean much.  Heat and food, then a shower if that isn't cutting it.  If all else fails I'll sit until I sleep, trying again later.

Good day.

Doing well.

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The show is coming to a close.  I'll be up a few more minutes to hours.  A phone call.  Mortgage.  Always something wrong.  I did get breakfast, a shave, and the laundry finished.  Some things are supposed to air dry, most was put through the dryer and is in my room ready to be processed.  Not all that much.  It will be done.  I have done a few other things, and will do dishes before sleeping.  Tired.  But my days are warped, so hitting an approaching appointment will be a blind piece of luck or a stretch.

I am getting better with the double bladed double edge razor.  I'm not close to excellent, if some of the problem today was being so tired.  There is solid improvement.  As well, I have some really bad whisker lay paths.  Perhaps, now that I know much more certainly what I am dealing with, looking for strategies for my particular problems would make more sense.  

Well, on to the call, dishes, laundry, else, then bed.  Good night.

Technically...

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I probably was finished by 3:00, perhaps 2:00.  I just wasn't done.  Or I could have been.  I added work to my list.  The only things remaining are the shower and shave, then stop at the post.  I may put a load of laundry in after the shower, maybe ri... no, definitely after.  That constant temp change is to much for my nerves.

I got a lot more work done than anticipated.  Who would think washing three groups of mason jars would be that much work though, as an example.  Each "little" extra task tacked on a lot more time worked.  I have been working at a moderate level for over half the time.  Nothing fancy, just given recent events I am pleased.

On to the shower and all.  Later or good night.
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Getting so close.  A shower, but no shave, yet.  To the post, taking the broken down boxes for deposit.  I'd like to get a shave, then reset kefir.  It is probably time to stir sourdoughs.  If I have enough, and I think I do, perhaps sourdough pancakes... and a few eggs.  I want to do dishes though.  It's a lot easier to do anything if the sinks are clear.  Ten, degrees, F, is what the thermometer read.  I needed some cool.

I even had time to work on my toes while drying a bit.  She did an excellent job, which means I am having to dig, attempting to separate the toe from toenail.  With some care, some persistence, and some push.  I'm amazed how much easier walking is.  Always been a bit nervous about getting that done.  The one time I had foot work done, at the V.A., I didn't get a good impression.  Power tools an no lotion or else.  I don't think one of them honestly knew what they were doing.

Good night.

Sticking with it?

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In one sense.  I haven't quit in spite of having done nothing, until this last hour.  I have gotten all of the empty or disposable boxes collected from the failed efforts of yesterday.  I even ignored the books.  I may not be the bookphile another is, but some topics... mental prayer for example.  Sure, I got books, but then lost track.  It isn't quite time to restart.  It burns to know more.  More so with some dreams of late.

Lights out.

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I thought I'd get to more.  I had dishes, mostly new items, ready to go.  I hadn't collected more boxes but expected to find and finish those.  I also didn't make it to the post.  I did take down the boxes already collected, took care of cat litter which is usually a twice a day thing or more anymore, I did a few odds and ends beyond.  I fed the girls what we called midrations around midnight... only it wasn't leftovers as it would be in the service.  Just because, every week or other, as I get treats.

After those things, I sat for a rest.  I didn't fall asleep.  I did time out.  I simply, after a bit, fell nearly to blankness.  I did some reading.  A bit on einkorn, some on liquid soap making.  There are a few things I need, according to this author.  Need?  Would prefer?  If I take her at her word, and from what I read and what I already know I accept belief as wisdom, then one product is more on the need side.  The other item is a bit of both, more because of my limits and facilitating faster processing.  They add more expense, however, that I am making soap just for myself, in small batches, this isn't an issue.

Eventually, given the price of soaps I currently use, the equipment and tools being one time costs, along with the ongoing expenses of expendables, I suspect, even using pricier expendables for replacement products of what I am currently using, two years will get me to a break even... replacing dish soap, laundry soap, shampoo, hand soap, and body soap.  I won't be using the most expensive, if I can avoid.  You can keep your organic, save for coconut oil... if that is for food stocks and this simply helps keep that in rotation.  I won't look for the cheapest either, as usual a middle way of prices, unless I make something special for gifting.

Something I am coming to realize, however, is that soap making isn't going to be quite as easy as thought.  Fine, I'll work through that.  The goal is to develop, if possible, a single, or small selection of, base recipe(s).  The only reason for several would be ingredient price fluctuations.  From that 'mother soap' it is hoped, all other soaps might be derived.  See, still using calculus!  Oh, I also want to work up a supply cost tracking system.  I want to be able to know, just by expendables, how much a cup, quart, gram, ounce, etc., costs to make, down to tenths of cents.  Not that I absolutely care, merely another part of the hobby.

Oh, just for grins... have you ever seen a cat stub her toe and trip?  With three legs to pick up the slack she didn't fall, but she did stumble.  My burst of laughter gave her further pause.  She almost turned around to glare, but chose not to.  Moving on a bit peeved, if too, I sensed that she caught a sense of my mirth as well.  It's just that animals have an even greater lack of self-deprecation than most humans.  She is learning.  I could almost taste her strange smile.  Strange to her, well known to me.

I ended sleeping hard and long.  I woke often, then crashed back quickly to sleep.  Dreams.  When dreaming of God the world is good.  I feel I understand the walking on water thing.  If only He would stay!  Then to realize He is always here.  Devastating to initially think God is leaving after such joy in His presence.  Such calm when I realize, just because I can't sense Him so closely anymore, doesn't mean He is gone.  He went the other way.

I'll get to dishes, boxes, a shower, and the post tonight.  Ugh but things are roiling.  I won't say it is all the massage and pedicure.  Winter is heading into spring as the titans falling on the Olympians.  It is a wonderful, terrible, beautiful, thing.  It is messing with my systems.  The spa work just doubled and complicated that.  Wonderful!  It's been a bit since I've gotten a full bite of creation in progress.  Chaos is another name for it.  Also known as life.  Tasty.

Later.

Not quite.

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No sleep.  Too cold.  Wet lungs and phlegm.  Just not able to get comfortable enough to sleep.  Strange.  Even out here I am cold.  My guess, as my body relaxed finally it doesn't have acces to turn machinery on.  It simply can't warm up.  I'll have to crank the furnace, and that is well dressed.  Two pair of socks, pj's and then some, ugh.  Cold!

If I can warm up it is back to the boxes.  Another batch of sourdough pancakes?  Maybe, with eggs on the side.  A smaller batch... say one egg, two to two and an half cups of starter, a pinch of salt, a tsp. of baking soda and powder?  Should work.  I may just go with pure maple syrup.  I keep small amounts of that stored.  Lasts a long time but it is good to turn it over, and buy more on top of it.

Back to the boxes?  Not quite yet.  The furnace first.  Then again, maybe the cold weather is simply back for a bit?  I'll get to it after I warm my bones.  Later.

Bits and pieces, then Boxes.

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Did I write Boxes? My mistake.  BOXES.  That is more accurate.  I started breaking them down, sorting packing (I keep paper, for now), stacking the torn down parts.  And, then, I kept on doing it.  Then more.  Then the other rooms.  More.  Really?  I think the boxes have been breeding!  Though I did sort them into each other while stacking.

I don't know how long, only that it was a good while.  I started to overheat.  So I went to gather the rest of the boxes.  I couldn't quite complete that task before finally needing a break.  I think I have most boxes ready.  Just six or eight yet in the wild.  Oh, I'll get them, if as with dishes, some may slip out of immediate action.

And the fillers!  The air pillows are the most compactable, if that requires each to be jabbed.  Paper is next.  Good for return packing (won't deflate as air bags will), can be used as a firestarter, insulation, or in the compost bin.  Probably other things.  The plastic is worthless to my knowledge.  Oh, as to peanuts?  If you have a box of them don't try to be clever.  Just keep them in that box and tape it up.  Or you do three times the work or more for no benefit.

I have done about what I can for the moment.  A nap, it is hoped, but back to it when I wake.  Boxes then figuring out wheat.  No complaints, I did more than I thought I could. Thought I'd hit sourdoughs, do just a few boxes, then crash.  I did a bunch of them, set up dishes, and really did okay.  Later, much later if the naps turns into a full time job.

A good sleep.

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A brutal wake.  Not sure what all pulled me from sleep.  The cats were battering the door.  A doorbell, knock, or both... I need to test the doorbell, the sound itself seemed to melt.  Hmm, a Dali sound to go with one of his clocks?  Either it needs to be replaced or I was dreaming.  Low voltage, shouldn't be a major operation.  I had to go to the bathroom.  And what I suspect is a final build up of phlegm was wanting to be expelled.  And it really wasn't time to wake, with just five or six hours down.  I fought what I could, as long as I could, but finally came out swinging.  The girls know to avoid me... if not really.  Play good and just don't goof.

I couldn't stay angry with them.  Their feeding time, for wet canned, has been right at noon for quite some time.  Couldn't really be angry for long, things just happen and compile.  While I really wasn't bodily ready to wake, I did want to be awake.  I like feeding the girls regularly.  I prefer to bring packages in quickly.  As to having to cough out spittle while holding in pee... I don't always agree with the jokes God set our bodies to play on us, but I see humbling humor in them.  Just laugh, when you can breath without problems in other areas.  Thankfully it wasn't a gas too.  Toot?

Sleep was good. Pain is gone for now.  If I do feel some kinship to jellyfish, wet rags, and unfinished custards.  I would guess most people hit this stage the day after the massage.  It just takes me a bit longer, at the start.  Now I am at the relaxed pleasure stages.  It is good.  I suspect phlegm really needed to be pushed out.  More will have to go for the next few runs.  I really should figure a way to swim again.  That would help keep the lungs freer and functioning.  Let me get massages and feet ordered first.  Were to go that is safe from gas theft...

Today?  Tearing down boxes, wherever they may be.  I'll just do that until I am sick of boxes, do as many more as I can, then switch to kitchen duty.  I want to check the mail tonight.  Best feed sourdoughs.  Oh, and the equipment which allows sprouting in half gallon mason jars is in.  That is for wheat.  Why?  Using quart jars means only filling half full.  Can you imagine how many quart jars it would take to get three to four pounds of wheat sprouted, or over how long?  Doable but either using four to six (or more) rather than two half gallon jugs, or using two over and over, losing nutrition while building stocks and the dehydrator would be running all the time.  I don't think those last long.  So, after boxes, or for a break, I'll get regular wheat sprouting.  One at a time.  I'll have to break into one of my pails, probably winter white, soft?  Something.

I don't know if I'll end up short circuiting early or not.  That won't make a difference.  I'll just crash if needed, then pick up wherever I left off, even if I crash several times.  I'll keep at it.  Dinner?  Not yet and don't know quite yet.  Burger, beans, salsa, and milk sounds good enough.

Regular wheat is different enough to merit it's own video.  This is pretty much my goal.  Yes, I have bannetons and a bread lame.  Perhaps not pearl handled in .45, but wicker, linen, stainless, and olive wood, if that will do?  Not for today.  Though as I begin sprouting some wheat I will grind other wheat for regular simple sourdough loafs, probably to start tomorrow.

My soap making kit and supplies are in.  But that is for next week, or... later, or sooner or later.  The big expense is the tools.  I, at least, don't wish to mix and match consumption and soap tools and cookery.  After that it's just supplies, which aren't expensive.  I'll end up making both bar and liquid, and for various uses... a new skill, plus with variability.  I did suggest I needed hobbies.  Why not make them functional hobbies?

Later.

Actually, yes.

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While it wasn't that much, it really was.  It took me since that last post to get it done, finishing with a shower, neck down.  I hate going to bed with a wet head and didn't think I'd be awake long enough for it to dry.  Just washed yesterday and dry 'shampoo' will do the trick.  I even fried pork chops and baked potatoes.  They were too dated to be anything more than just something.  Not bad, just no greatness left to them.

Dishes, ground flour, stirring and feeding of one sourdoughs, which was given too little earlier.  I have been running a mean kitchen.  While I will stumble I'll dust off, fix it, or otherwise keep at it.  I think I'll get a reasonable portion of the list whenever I wake up for good today.

Some of it.

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Hold on.  I am not finished.  Most of the dishes.  More than I thought, recycled the water kefir grains... just dumped the 'water'.  It just isn't working out, so far.  Too cold, to inconsistent, both?  I've not been able to second ferment to fizzwater.  It may just be that the grains take a while to become active enough, which requires more heat, consistently, than I can give them.  Hmm, could turn the heat on in the en suite.  But that heat costs through the nose.  And I'd likely forget.

Ran out of energy, for the moment.  Still hoping to finish the dishes, grind spelt and mix the sourdoughs, and maybe get a shower in.  Then sleep well.  I will be satisfied with the efforts.  Tomorrow boxes, sorting, and surfaces.  Still a light day, but with direction in advance.  Perhaps I can get it all, maybe more, perhaps not.  Whatever, but the plan is created if I can use it.

Ever get the feeling vultures are watching.  Ever wonder what expression a group of vultures gets when they realize they are the prey?  *grins*  Just... a strange feeling.  As if someone(s) is preparing the grave, the next grave, I will be exiting.  They really never learn.

Just a nap.

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Longer than a typical nap, but not ten hours down after a few awake, either.  Sleep was as good as it should be, if a pillow between the knees and careful placement of my neck and shoulders to start, then every time I rolled or shifted.  It takes focus to do that while sleeping.  I think that I can do it has something to do with dream control.  I have to put it in my mind before sleep and consciously focus even while technically still asleep, but I can do this and a few other different things.  Never tried to do several things at once, have some doubts, but I have been wrong before.

Most aches and pains are rounding off, softening.  I forgot to take aspirin but will now. I need a stronger easement which requires something.  The less I take it the more effective it is.  Oh, since cold wasn't working, I have gone back to higher heat.  I think, for now, that is the ticket.

Oh, and popcorn for a snack, perhaps a show.  I don't know what youtube has done, exactly.  What I do know is I don't like their "random generation pops", so there is no reason for me to bother.  They want to screw around, even with music, based on politics, they can go without my patronage.  They have even jiggered with my "watch again" selection.

A called home.  A snow, and ice, storm there.  Half a day of work today, probably none tomorrow.  Plus her street is sheet-ice.  Not much I can do.  Did find out when the trip is.  She wanted me to arrive just a few days before heading out.  I was thinking more like a week ahead.  If I get back in shape, since it won't be high summer, I can acclimate better by helping with dishes, laundry, and else stuff... so I'm not a full load drag of a visitor.  Heck, I don't think my mother has had a souffle.  Hmm, though I best work on getting more flavor in those.

We won't be staying even a week.  Not sure if I will be staying at my brother's house, there may not be room.  It'll be very short, probably busy, as they will be moving shortly thereafter.  I'm not sure if a family reunion will be in the planning stages when we return.  For next year, hopefully in the spring, if so.

Not sure if the uncle and aunt, a brother and sister of my mom, will be going or not.  Would be nice if I... have my doubts.  I sure hope so, but I know how things go.  For me too sometimes.  Yeah, I really know.

Hmm?  I had best consider wardrobe.  I have nice clothes but the sizing is awful.  If they can't be sized they need to be replaced.  I am guessing replaced...  46 or 44 down to 40 or 38.  And my dress shirts fit as sails.  Oddly, my sport jacket still fits, if I can find it.  Yes, losing in the right places.  I'd love a right suit, but timing and money, and continued losses?  I should get in and check.  Half down up front, a month to process?  Maybe.  Room in money and time beyond the givens, if just.  Ugh.  At least reasonable slacks, a shirt or two, and a proper dress belt?  If I can find the jacket.  Bleh.  Money, money, money.

Oh, what to get for gift.  Mother will say $20 in card.  No, mother.  At least books for a session, as a minimum.  A $100 won't clear that.  She gives bits all the time, doesn't realize how much she gives.

Well.  To aspirin, popcorn, a movie, then dishes, boxes, and the kitchen?  That is the plan, hope. I haven't fallen further behind than dishes, mostly.  I think I can catch up in a day, and grind well beyond in a week, if I can crunch the tasks.  Later.

Food helps.

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Not up to serious cooking.  While oatmeal hadn't been soaked, in a pinch going without works.  I just needed something solid and slow to digest.  Pork chops seemed too harsh.  Even oatmeal seemed too much.  Between being easy to cook and the softest on the stomach of options I could put together the choice was made for me.  That and a handful of crasins, plus milk, and I am feeling like turkeys used to, right before baking.

I may head back to bed.  I am getting better.  Everything is easing.  A day or two more?  Who knows.  Well, and I did a lot of work last week.  There is that.  Sleep again for sure.  Later, good night, whatever.

Just a bit better.

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Sleep from the last post until now.  I've been strategically placing pillows, will begin taking aspirin, as well as a few other tricks I have learned when suffering isn't getting me anywhere or I have cause to set it aside.  Why not always attempt to put the pain away?  To do that would take addictive and illegal drugs.  I'd rather the pain, mostly used to it.  Though, if I think there is a cause and a cure, or even a temporary way out... which isn't worse in the long run immoral or illegal, I might give it a shot.  Actually even, as with massages, if they cause a few steps back at the start.

Some try to say the government shouldn't be involved.  Just look at the death rates and it is obvious that the government has to be involved.  Unfortunately, because of graft, the only real involvement by the government is keeping the prices stable.  That makes their cut more reliable and gives away the little fish dealers when it's time to cull their numbers.  Still, to some degree, it makes use prohibitive for more.

Cold.  That often helps with recovery.  Not so much this time.  I don't know if it is the basis, aging, or something else.  The cold is helping sleep, which usually helps restore... perhaps just sleeping to deep.  Pillows placements, careful neck alignment, that might be the trick.  I'll figure it out.  Right after a nap?  Phftftf.

The wheat and carts arrived.  While not truly heavy, in my current state and with some weight to them, they offered fair resistance.  Which I believe to be a good thing.  I don't know when I will get to the carts, though sooner is better.  Then my kitchen machinery will all be available withough a ton of juggling.  As to the wheat, I'll hit the spelt first.  The einkorn is in four, 5 pound, sealed and gassed bags.

Actually, as soon as I can get back to things, I'd like to get an up-to-date blood sugar meter, then grind regular and spelt wheats, then sprouted, using it for bread, eating two slices daily for a week (each made fresh, from as absolutely fresh ground or/and sprouted and ground flour).  After those I'll hit einkorn similarly.  Overkill for most people, might not be enough for me?  Time will tell.

One thing about even home ground and more so sprouted grains is that you have to use it quickly.  Or you lose the nutrients you have worked so hard to obtain.  Once sprouted, more so sprouted and ground, the nutritional degradation is vastly accelerated.  Just a warning I see missed in many vids.  Too long out and you almost might as well be, nutritionally, back to bleached white.  Don't say I didn't warn you.  If you are going to the bother and expense then finish it out right.  Freezing after each process stage will buy some time.  But don't think months... weeks.  Yeah, it's a tough racket.

Later.

Still a bit harsh.

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The shower helped.  I collected trash and got that out.  I fed the sourdough.  I took care of the cat litter and fed the girls.  Too tired and sore for much else.  I will be going back to bed shortly.  I sure hope I get better at handling massages soon.  It took a while the first time.  Just staying awake to drive home used to be the first trick.

Sore here and there.  Some of it from the massage, some of it from excessive sleeping?  Some if it from sleeping too sound, not rolling.  I'll stick with it, it really did lower bp to normal or near-normal levels, and that was without medication I think.  It was before they diagnosed me with heart disease.

As for the feet, those are healed from nipping and such.  They fit in boots and shoes without background pains I am only noticing by their absences.  All good.  I am, with the nails trimmed so well, able to dig under the nails better.  Between her and myself, my feet might really get in super shape quickly.  It seems, with my second biggest toes, the weird nails aren't from fungus or infection.  After a bit of talking I probably know why.  I claw my feet when walking, and when pain encroaches.  It's a coping method, as chewing my teeth once was as well.  I have... quite a few little tricks.  It seems there are costs to all of them.

Good night.

I keep crashing.

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Sore, tired, zapped, drained.  Ah, but I figured out some of it.  I used to only do half hour sessions, at the masseuse.  These are full hour sessions, their minimum.  I knew there would be a duty attached.  Not surprised.  The pedicure adds to it.  I will keep them together as planned, but may separate them already.  Too much.  It will complicate things for a bit.  At least I can reschedule, schedule based on my timing, and such.  I have been more stable lately... my days and nights aren't always right, they just aren't perpetually changing.

Oh, another thing, massages shake up the g.i.  Not a bad thing.  Just something to realize.  Not nearly as bad as the first few times.  Not bad, actually, at all, this time.  Simply a mild realization.  And bloody noses, until my body gets used to it.  Glad I didn't go with deep tissue.  I may hold off on that for several more sessions than planned.

I did look the feet over, after getting enough rest in.  They are even better than I had thought.  I am amazed at how much she got off the heels, and other places.  The skin around the toenails, the angles of the toenails, all of it.  I can clip, just not well.  And I didn't trust myself to take the skin off near the nails.  It hurt a bit while she did it, but I wasn't about to complain.  She had a good angle of sight, the right tools, little risk of slipping as I do when I have tried, plus experience.  To be honest, I think I'll be able to walk more correctly, and without pain.  One of those little pains I shove to the back of my mind, don't directly feel.

Dinner wasn't all that good.  The beef wasn't warm enough, the cabbage wasn't my favorite sort... none of it was warm enough actually.  I may have to use the microwave or figure a better way to warm leftovers.  That just won't do.

I ended up going back to bed after the meal.  I just woke up again.  Good thing I didn't have anything planned.  I Couldn't have done anything.  Still recovering.  Later.

A rough night.

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I suspect the message is still doing it's thing.  My systems are... unusual.  I think I remain tense in a seemingly relaxed way.  Which means messages don't do their thing as quickly with me.  If I had to guess, I would say the message is half to two thirds finished.  After it finishes, then I can recover.  It might sound like a story, I don't think it is.  I forgot from last time, but now remember something along these lines.

Things are tightened which must loosen again.  Things have been moved, shifted, and need to find their places again, from organs to joints to muscles.  Well, and now sleep is getting into the dead zone.  Which means I risk sleeping without rolling.  Too much rolling is bad.  Too little fussing is worse.  Definitely too little last night, if recovery is faster than usual.

The roast was very good.  I'm warming it for a second go.  I found another ingredient which went in with the rest, mushrooms.  I love those things.  Time to eat.  Today is mostly rest and recovery.  Dishes, a shower, and getting trash out otherwise.  Zapped.  Later.

A lamb chop and eggs.

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Various spices, mostly tarragon cinnamon and ginger.  Honestly it seemed right.  Eggs were, well, eggs.  You can do interesting things with eggs.  As to taste and texture eggs will always, and just, be eggs.  You can make them more or less palatable.  You simply can't turn the drawbridge into the grand keep.  Still, something to bolster the other, really.

Still hungry.  I have the roast counter-curing.  Lettering salt, pepper, and a few other herbs and spices soak in as it gets to room temp.  It helps beef, from the finest steaks to the cheapest roast.  Salt, pepper, and garlic if you can keep in American.  A few others if you know what you are doing, or don't.  With the roast, potatoes, onion, cabbage, and rutabaga.  I keep thinking of mashed potatoes but it's too much, especially just for me.

I would like to sleep but I am too hungry.  That bite of a chop and eggs just didn't cut it.
Too little, too mild.  I won't swear to it but, save for the veggies, I feel as if I could eat the whole roast.  I'd sure like that, save for the overfull sensation which doesn't allow good rest.  No, I'll have a good portion of all, far less than my eyes say, and have three or four meals yet from it.

Good night.