Yeah, no.

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She is definitely out of the game for a bit.  She did wake, get up.  We had coffee, a bit of a talk.  I helped her with a few things, then got her back to bed, and bundled.  She is in rough shape.  I'll try to get her to take it easy for a bit.  I don't think it will be a hard sell.

I canceled the appointment.  If I need to cancel another and make two others.  Ugh.  But not this morning.  Later.

I did get trash together and out.  Almost chilly out there.  But supposed to get into the 90s the next two days?  It does cool better, and isn't staying hot long.  Very strange year, for heat and cool, this year.

It's time to go on back to bed myself.  My ribs hurt just a bit, have for a while.  Final healing processes from my fall?  Or just... something else?  I never can be sure.  On to rest.  Can't do much else.

Wanted a shower, and last night.  Can't quite pull it off.  Now or then.  Be well.

Up on time.

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Now, down to take a shower.  Checking on mother.  And, probably, canceling a procedure.  It is her ribs of most concern.  Not sure she will be able to get out of bed today.  Hoping her back isn't hurt too, but think it was her ribs.  So delicate, even I at times, in ways.

Dreamed.  Resurrected from the casting of stones in the form of the bowie knife.  It hurt more to heal than the production of the wound.  Now I am sure I can have dreams continue.  I was pretty sure I have, but heard that isn't possible.  Again, so much for experts.

Mother went down hard.

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Took the dog for a walk.  She took off on her.  Mother wouldn't let go of the leash.  Ended up down very hard.  Glad I reminded her to take her phone.

I have learned, sometimes, to ignore what mom thinks, and do things more my way.  In this case, getting her up.  If not until we got her sorted, making sure we should move her.  Still not absolutely convinced, on that account.  May yet need to call an ambulunce.  I will leave that call with her, until or unless I have greater cause to set her wishes aside.

Oh, for selling house?

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I must admit, I missed the bubble.  If I could sell, at this point, it would most likely just clean the slate.  Pay off debts, perhaps walk with a few tens of thousands.  Buyers are not out there, for listed or suggested prices.  Not even steeply discounted prices.  I have been watching for a while.  More locally, regionally.

Some think a drop in interest rates would help.  And it might, for a few who are ready to buy and sell, or on/in the market.  It would be a trick, short term.  Only for a few, and not a great bet even then.  Possibly better than renting?  In some odd markets, maybe.

But, houses seem not only be have prices crashing, without selling even so.  But with very little interest on any front.  As mentioned, I would only sell if I could pay everything and then pay off another house.  The market won't support that, no matter what the state or else says the house is worth.  It's about as good as the used diamond market, currently.  Even with a serious downgrade in house size.

Absolutely couldn't take the hit, only to have to buy into a different house, in the inflated market even with those caveats, at this interest rate.  Stuck.  No way out whatsoever, unless selling and going overseas.

Renting the place is a thought.  But that would be rough.  Assuming the government doesn't stop landlords from collecting again?  They really... killed trust by doing that, in an already rocky industry.  I have to think that was part of why it was done.

Rent is good money, if you can actually get it.

Of course, there is mom.  But if she pushes beyond my ability to recover?  I'll have to figure something else out for her anyway.  I simply won't allow her to drive me into the grave.  Ugh.  My brother and she are better matched, but he'd have none of it.  Too bad.  He could use the help, and oddly could keep up with her.  His wife wouldn't have it either.  Oh well.

I suppose he already has a woman shoving him toward his casket.  Two is at least one too many.  *grins*

Later.

Sleeping in volume.

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Mom is getting lonely.  But I can't do much for it.  Every time I wake to talk, she begins making lists of things to do.  It is, if reports are accurate, back into the high eighties again.  Between her and the heat, medicine, and what has been done this summer in the heat, I am done until I can recover.

I won't let her, or events, kill me.  She just refuses to understand.  So must be left to herself.  She asked that I wake and be present with her this noon, for a few hours.  I said I would, but that I wouldn't work.  Will see.  If it is more attempted pushing, it will be a short visit.

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A monster?

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How would you know if you are one?  I can't say for all.  For me?  I couldn't see until I came to the light.  Until I first began discerning virtue from vice.  And, more, seeking virtue.  If virtue, I further came to understand, was truly God writ small.  A terrifying realization, mind you.  As I have written, I initially thought I could obtain virtue, but use it to my ends, and turn it on or off as if it had a power switch, like a light.

But, no.  Virtues aren't toys, tools, or owned items.  I either had them, used them, as on-only systems (to within my limited abilities, mind you), or not.  And, as strongly as I tried, even with sincere practice, to some degree, virtues escape me.  Still learning.

Much sleep.

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Mother calls me, she says.  I don't remember.  Sleeping eighteen, twenty, more hours at a time.  Do I get up, for water, a bite, the facilities?  Not that I recall, though not that I would.

Tired beyond some of your ability to uunderstand.  I won't say sleep is helping?  But it isn't hurting.  Mostly sleeping, now.  Not partly resting as before.