A strange story from this morning.

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I was dreaming.  I was involved with a number of people.  We were at war, in a smaller way, with some sort of evil.  My allies were a cross between Catholic spiritual warriors and spook types.  Spooks, as you might have gathered, are not my favorite types.  But these were a bit different... not political advocacy spooks, mostly.  Some of them were reformed to faith, others had never been that sort to start out.

The bad guys had upper floors in something like a hospital, or research lab.  We needed some things from their position, no choice but to go in or die trying.  One of the lab personnel, who had been on our side before being overrun, had put herself in some sort of coma, attached to equipment that, to me, seemed like and ekg.  I suppose it was how she survived.  Though we weren't certain she would make it, or what condition she really was in.  We only suspected it was self-induced and successful if there were several bits of evidence to suggest that.

She has left a coded instruction about how to decipher the ekg readings (or to whichever machine she was attached).  She seemed to indicate that there was a message, or might be, if we could just figure it out.  I had called up the operators with the skills, two, blind reading apart from each other, in hopes of being more certain.  Right as the first who was to do the reading was to give me what I needed, a cat started meowing, and tickling my face.  Sam woke me.  She seemed terribly worried about me.  I was not happy.  Yet how can you even be too angry to see loving concerned eyes?

Are cats evil?  At worst they are animal, so no.  Sam isn't just animal, not now.  While I might not be human, I have come to the call of the Maker.  Those animals which become associated to and with me, through my call to salvation also come to be better, more.  Annoyed, even so.  Still, that is how it worked.  I am not sure why she woke me... was I learning something I shouldn't, was I being led astray, or was she just worried about what was happening externally... just to her physical eyes.  I have not see that sort of concern in her eyes before.  But the girls do try to wake me from time to time.

True story, if I know the fullness of things no more than you.  Oh, and good night.

Alright, calling it game.

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As far as Trump, that is.  Whether this is what he promised, or whether it will continue or work as suggested, those are something else.  In the here and now, what he has done is exemplary.  I can't find fault.

Do I want more?  Of course.  He, on his own, cannot do more.  Congress has to to it's part, the courts have to do their parts, the state and local governments have to do their parts, and we have to do our parts.  Our part isn't just to push, call, and vote with our dollars, it is also to accept the prices that will come with these choices.  Some of those costs will be short term, some will be long.

For example, if we really don't want immigration, we have to reform our education system, reform our workforce to engage more women as stay-at-home mothers so as to have more children, and many other things.  President Trump cannot simply mandate that.  Women have to choose, men have to accept, the rules have to change in order that these things happen, laws have to change, taxation has to be sorted.  There is a price for all involved.

I do think president Trump is showing all the signs that he really is not just pro-American, but for what is right.  Those are only synonymous if America is heading much more in the right direction than not.  It isn't, not quite yet.  If president Trump wins, it might head back that way.  Just... there will be costs, choices, some surrendering of this for that.

I will admit, while I am becoming much more pro-Trump as time passes, as he does things, I am quite wary of his supporters.  To be honest, I have the same trouble with some of Christ's supporters.  Not a new thing.  And, no, I am not equating Trump with Christ, only suggesting that supporters of better or best can all go very far astray.  I simply refuse to be a fan-boy.  I'm not a fan-boy of Christ, merely a servant when I can be kin.  I can't live up to being kin, always, so I must suffer through merely serving.  I am certainly not a fan-boy of Trump.  I merely realize his politics is, from what I can see at this point, both honest, precise, and accurate.

Thank you, president Trump.  Stay healthy and keep at it.  You have my support.

My morning are getting later each day.

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Oh well.  It's how it goes when you are your own world.  I see people from time to time, but there isn't any involvement in regular life.  Health plays it's part, as does the weather and season.

I keep thinking, of the men who lived here before it was civilized.  Before settlers arrived, there was a rendezvous held in this valley by mountainmen.  I'd have to look where it was held.  I don't know if they then wintered in the valley or headed south, or even north.  Mountain men did what they did.  South might have been warmer, but with warmth comes people.  Horses and mules, by winter, were useless for travel.  There were no forms of air transportation.  By foot.  I am not sure if skis had made it to America then, possibly only snowshoes.  Sleds as well.

If I go camping in the cold, I will need not just snowshoes (at least, maybe skis of some sort or other), but a sled.  While a pack is okay, for rather short stays, what might be needed could easily become excessive for any pack.  Spreading the weight of gear over a six or eight by two foot sled would definitely be easier than spreading it over a forty two by twelve inch snowshoe.  Sure, there are two snowshoes, but only one is down most of the time.  Take off pack weight, and even at my weight, those snowshoes should do... most of the time.  Though I have found, in fresh powder, I probably need even another type of snowshoe... a bearpaw, but sized for me and with close strung rope and knotwork.  Two pair of snow shoes, a pair of variably (slope and flat) crosscountry skis, the gear, and a sled.

My guess is that is what they used around here, if they wintered over.  But they had cabins, too, and a way out if it snowed too much.  They didn't go to town, there was no town.  If they went out it was to hunt.  And, most likely, they would shelter in the valleys.  That is where game would be anyway.  They didn't travel far.  Always exceptions, both successful and not.  How many mountain men bones are scattered throughout the mountains is anybody's guess.  It's a risky thing.  And, yet, it's what I am hoping to do, soon or late.  Though not great travel.  A few days in, a few days there, and then back.  At most a few weeks out, if I can plan for food and learn enough to keep warm enough.  Why?  Ah... because I can.  I didn't say, or mean, because I can succeed, if that is the goal.  I mean, because I can try.  I do have the gear.  And I mean to do it well, correctly, and return.  But that isn't always our choice.

Just daydreaming about getting out.  The new snowshoes should be here before long.  While handy, and more suited to my size, they still won't do really well in very deep or powdery snow, less so when what I face is both deep and powdered.  It will get me started.  Just out back a bit more, then on to a Green Canyon, which is sloped but tamed and used.  Then, maybe, some wilder runs.  I'll work gear in, look at sleds, consider the other gear over the winter, if I can keep at it.  Later.

To town.

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Nothing fancy.  Minor grocery shopping, a popcorn popper and I looked at tea brewing machines, plus some bulbs of a very strange size for the bedroom.  Tiny little screw-based bulb with no information on it.  I was hoping to buy several packs, as I do when I hit a product that can be a snag in otherwise simple replacement.  Only a pack of two was available.  I saw no advantage to the tea brewing machines over simply repurposing a coffee pot and several downsides.

I am having a rough day.  I didn't do much, save to get to town.  I didn't salt, though that wasn't really needed.  I didn't shower, if I did yesterday.  I didn't even make food, eating on my way home.  Something is simply very off.  I'll keep trying, I just don't expect a lot.  Tired, worn down, unable to get to things.  There is always tomorrow.

Good night.

Oh, right. I ought to post.

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It's been a bit of a rough morning.  As with yesterday, similar anyway.  I never did get out yesterday.  Maybe today.  Thankfully no extra snow in the last few days.  I would like to salt the driveway anyway.  It just helps thaw a bit, and evaporate some of what is stuck down.  If I go to town I will get more salt, and at least ask about sand, or better those two products already mixed.  Salt is good, but it doesn't last.  Sand might just stay down a bit better, for longer.  I've not messed with this so I am not sure exactly what works best.  I suppose it is time to learn.

I am really hoping, if I am around this coming year, to consider a lawn/garden tractor.  If I want to use it for snow, or gardening, it would have to be a bit more than just a simple riding lawnmower.  I am not sure I can afford it, plus the attachments, though.  Then again, buying the main rig, then adding a piece every six months to year... that might be possible.  I do want it for mowing though too.  Bleh...  I have attempted to do research but there isn't very good information out there.  I am finding sellers, or buyer data, or fan-boys for one or various brands.  John Deere is good, but it is awfully expensive for what you get.  Green for green as much as anything else.  It's for businesses, so they have more of a write-off.  I realized, back when IBM and clones were priced so drastically different, and ran about the same, that it was a tax gimmick.  Which we need to fix, terribly need to fix.  That is corrupting the whole thing.  I suppose, if one has been working with a company professionally for years, buying their equipment might... be more than just a simple consumer decision, but I can't afford it.

Oh, I best feed the girls.  The natives are definitely getting restless.  Mewling, skittering, chasing, stalking me, and growling.  I usually feed them several hours after waking.  It's been around four.  Still... they need to have some variance and I will never be perfect.  Later.

Hmm?

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Shhhh...  I'm hunting wabbits.

When they have lost.

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Rather than realizing they are no longer in control, they snipe.  Whether financially or electronically.  Currently my access to the web seems to be being rerouted through foreign countries by which I cannot watch some youtube videos.  Their bosses... do they realize what is being done in their name?  Attacking the people, for political correctness, which is on it's death bed and all those who favor it are in the targets of all the people they are trying to smash using it.

The little sjw's think their masters do this for the sake of humanity.  They don't, they merely do it in order to force the borders open and allow in cheap labor, if at the cost of the people in terms of civilization, tradition, and culture, and in dollars as taxpayers.  I love it when I hear of layoffs or libtechs being forced to train their cheap replacements.  Of course, that just creates more welfare babies.  Still, it's the idea, sometimes, that counts.

Just... letting you, and them, know that yes we do know.  And they will be remembered.  You have lists, actively being attacked.  We, too, have lists... not even begun.  Perhaps, rather than bringing what you want of America here, you will be 'allowed' to go find it out there.  Keep it up and it won't be a choice.  Trump isn't the lead, he simply wanted what he wanted and offered what it took to get it.  He is a politician, not the will, of the people.  That hasn't been activated... yet.

Always more snow.

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To be honest, I think it is more the cold than anything.  When it is this cold, if there is moisture up there, with or without clouds, and the cold reaches to the heavens (doesn't always), we will get snow.  Maybe there is more moisture up there, I just don't think that is the thing.  Then again, I'm really not a meteorologist.  Then again I don't think that actually means a lot.  It's sort of like being a newspaper man.  Less about knowing and more about sensationalizing, propagandizing, and selling.  P.T. Barnum and Bailey is not the only clown circus going down, by the way, public or private it seems.

No, I won't shovel today.  I just don't think there is enough.  Tomorrow or the next day, if this continues as is, I will again have to shovel.  Not today, if my eyes saw true.  I am glad for it.  I don't mind shoveling a few times a week, but if gets to daily I fail quickly.  The snow blower takes more energy than shoveling up to, say, three to five inches of the powdery stuff, though is useless on wet snow, so is only good half the time when it snows that deep anyway.  Even so, shoveling takes what little I sometimes have to offer out of the game plan or costs me in the longer run.  If I could cook, do all else, and shovel, that might help.  Of course, cooking comes with shopping, cleaning, and the cooking itself.  Nothing is as easy as it sounds.

I am hoping to get another shower, get to town to shop, and get home quickly.  I may look for boxes to break down and take in.  I shouldn't have much.  If I am going, and it's an otherwise light day all around, it's a good day to find a minor extra for the while.  I have started back on some stuff, potassium was really low, and I could tell.  It was hurting my efforts.  So, for the next few days, potassium twice a day, along with my chewable vitamin.  When I get the sense that is going again, then back to all meds if lower on the carvedilol.  That was pounding me into the dirt in a stealthy manner.  I have to remember to approach that with great caution.  It can do great goo, but it is poison.  It reminds me of what happened, on a much smaller scale, when my heart first when bad.  I fell.  Caution, moderation, slow to dose.  I thought I could handle starting at half dose.  I can't.  Such a struggle just to take medicine!

Up late, but with an eye to the sky and reasonable plans.  Good morning and day.  Hmm... I think I might just have breakfast in town.  Yeah, I know, but it helps.  Then, after shopping, I'll get my larder in order for meals here at home.  Gotta have food if I'm going to be shoveling, doing dishes and laundry, and all.  Multi-day fasting is for the weekends, and even daily fasting has to allow for sufficient intake at the right times.  So... once again I begin.  May your efforts be blessed and you find pleasure and success in your work.

Not all, some.

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I did feel the need to shovel.  I didn't do the whole drive, just what I would be driving over.  It was iced underneath, but not sheeted.  The salting saw to it that the ice was as wormed wood... incomplete and punky, as ice goes.  Taking off the top bit of snow loosened more of the ice, taking some away.  I will salt againg tomorrow.

I didn't do all that was planned, today, either.  I picked up the shirts and dropped off the package.  That was $40 and a bit back in the account, if that wasn't the reason for the return.  I hate when I think I am ordering something and get something else.  I am looking for a screwdriver type socket drive with sockets... a small kit just of that.  While ratcheting sockets can be okay, often there is no need and the ratchet system is a pain.  That's when I love to have a 1/4", and maybe larger, screwdriver socket drivers.  These seemed that, then turned into just another overpriced under-useful weird odds and ends kit... not sockets in sight.  I could swear I read that it was a driver in the description.  Jerks just try to push whatever they can, and attempt to trick rather than provide.

I may go in again tomorrow.  I would like to stop at walmart for some things, then do grocery shopping... checking dates on everything of course.  And I need gasoline.

Oh, what put me off finishing my lists was dinner.  It's been a while since I had a better dinner.  Not a fast food, or sandwich, or such, but a real meal.  And not just a second one off, but a real meal.  So I hit the steak house tonight.  A ribeye, potato, and salad.  I needed something a little more, and got it.  After this coming month, I'll put up for a couple of roasts of ribeye, cut how I like it, if available.  One all inch and a quarter, one all inch and an half.  It's a lot of meat, but it's perfect keto food.  One every other to every third day.  A little practice and I should get the cooking down to an art.  That thick and both will take to oven cooking to get ready, then a good searing over a coal shoot.  That really does well.  I like crisped fat, especially of beef though pork isn't bad... bacon!

Good night.

I got the total.

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It is pretty expensive, but I think, without a loan, I can cover... everything.  It won't drain me completely dry, either.  That may include the mortgage payment for next month as well, and the hog... if I will put half of that on credit just to have something left  in the bank.  Probably.  I looked at everything I can imagine.  Bills going out, money in place, money coming in, the works... at least what I could imagine to consider.  If that assessment was correct, I should be fine.  Then again, if I miss something, and it gets bumped?  Tough.  More so since the following month I will be back in the easy black.  I'm more concerned with my home than with a late bill or even five if that happened to be the case.  Though I know there is probably only one or two bills out there, at most, that I may need to tidy up.  And, I might even be able to clear those.  Yeah, it... I... we'll see.

Oh, right, well, I'd best get going if I am going to get to town.  A shower, some air drying while I finish an episode, then on to town.  I'll need to pack the return, a bit, and label it.  I have my list ready.  All good.  But I best get going... not sure when UPS closes.  I'll not worry about the little bit of snow out there, just can't.  Gotta go.  Later.

Up, late, and rough.

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It's pretty rare that I drink much these days.  Yesterday, however, I let it slide.  I didn't get too into the sip, just kept it steady for a bit.  Anymore, if I have a drink, it's just something on the rocks, with a two a day limit, and rare at that.  Well, if you aren't in drinking shape, even a few over the limit, even well paced, can make the morning just a bit rough.  The part of might be that I sampled rum.  My old friend liked that stuff, and I have some for when I eventually visit his grave.  A tipple for each of us.  Now, I only had one, but that is sort of different stuff.  He drinks the clear stuff, so it wasn't sugary or such.  Anyway, I'm in recovery mode, and slept in, if that seems to be happening with or without a sip.  Stress and still healing.

Feels so good to work.

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While it was a light effort, the snow being light, mostly dry, and fluffy... plus only an inch or two, it winded me.  I needed it though.  I do my best to push when I can, as much as I can.  After the shoveling, I grabbed fresh forty pound bag of salt and let that out.  There is ice, and slush, under.  It is warm enough that the salt will do some work yet today.

Next, a break.  I have my clothes set out for a shower.  I have a list of groceries and sunders.  The drive is clear, and should get clearer.  All I have to do now is rest, shower, perhaps rest again with another episode, then to town.  today?  I don't know.  I'll see if I get wind back.  I need more wind, though I think it's okay.  Even so, I won't be overreaching today.  If I can I will, if I can't I won't.

I will get a shower though, either way.  Good afternoon, and day.  I hope if you, too, can get in a few licks on the piles of duties, chores, and wants, you give them a little hell for me, too.  I definitely keep you in mind while I work.  In a good, hopeful way.  Be well.

It is time.

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I need to dress, though just roughly, and get to the snow.  It looks light... fluffy... but there are several inches.  It's always difficult to gauge, just by eye.  If it is right, the snowblower might be easier.  If it is too wet, however, the shovel is the only way.  I have to scoop the front exit and a starting part of the drive nearest the garage, I'll figure it out there.

Then a shower and maybe off to town, unless it is snowing too heavily.  I haven't looked in a bit.

I can't believe it, but the air popcorn popper burned out.  I've only had it about three or four months.  Insane.  While I have used it as much as twice a day, that has only been more recently, and not even truly that.  I doubt, all told, it has been used even half as many days as I have owned it.  It wouldn't be worth the hassle to try to contact the company then work on an exchange.  I purchased it through amazon, but at this point...  I have too many other problems, duties, and such to add one more wild goose chase to the list.

Well... on with the day.  Later.

This company is simply lying.

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Every time I turn around this company lies to me.  I could not find the paperwork with the information on it.  So I called in.  Guess what, now they won't accept the backdue or reinstate, again, until the full amount is paid.  And, again, they don't know how much is due.  I won't bother with them until the 3rd.  I was told, if they find out what the full amount is, they will call.  But I don't believe them.  I pretty much crashed after that, yesterday.  The stress is getting to me.  And that, honestly, I think, is their point.  So I will not let that get to me.  The information I had is gone, as is some other paperwork.  I looked everywhere.  Yeah, I am suspicious.  Some are working against me much more seriously than what it would seem.

The neighbors arrived with, essentially, a small tractor and commercial snow blower.  Getting through that by hand would have been... a whole lot of work.  It wouldn't have been done in a day.  Not by me.  It's a murder of snow this year.  The banks of my drive are four to five feet high, if tapering, also that wide.  Yeah, there is a lot of snow this year.

I'd like to get to town, it's... I might figure it out today.  Just for a few groceries and those shirts.  Oh, and a return.  I'll spend some time waking, then head out and shovel today.  It's not so bad, just, yeah, more.  Three to five inches?  Something.  At least the cold isn't getting to me anymore.  It never really does when I am dressed and out, just when I am laying low, and down and out, in the cave.  Then it seeps in everywhere and bites.

Time to work at waking.  I watched the American Horror series recently, up to what I can watch for free, and have just started Game of Thrones.  I never did watch Vikings, or whatever that is, or haven't yet.  I won't watch anything with commercials, and I won't pay a fortune for something I am not sure about.  I figure an episode or two, then on to shoveling, a shower, and maybe to town.  Good morning and day.

Snow, and a lot of it.

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This is as much snow as I have seen since the last major snow day.  The rest of the snows have been a matter of several inches.  This could be eight to fourteen inches, depending where I measure.  I am thinking I will have to use the snow machine, if even it will cut it.  That's a lot of work before I can even get to town, but there it is.  As well, the paper I had the information written on has gone missing.  No problem with that, it's a good thing for telephones.  Yet, it is a problem, for a specific reason.  Yeah, I get it.

Work, then a shower, then air dry a bit if I can before heading to town.  Annoying but that is the way it goes.  I just hope the snow blower even can break through this.  Then again, maybe my waking eyes were... exaggerating.  I still need to wake.  Yeah, a later start this morning, and then the internet was not lighting up, had to tinker with that.  Everything seems to be a problem this morning.  Oh well, I'll get it done.  I just have to double check everything and everyone all along the way.  Knowingly, willfully, or not, the world seems dead against me on this day and in certain ways.  Just bull through harder and more attentively, in times like this.

A bit of waking first.  No real choice.  I'll set the alarm for a couple of hours, sort of to keep my on track, then hit it.  Good morning and day.

A bit better.

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Efforts at dragging through the muck to find footing and direction.  I did some small amount of dishes then took a shower.  I did very minor shoveling to try to neaten what someone else had already done, then salted the walk and part of the drive.  As well, a meal, or two?  It is difficult to even eat, to be honest.

It isn't the cold.  I have gotten so used to the cold that at night, I turn the furnace to 66 F.  It is colder in my room as I keep the vent closed.  Even so, some night I feel the need for the fan.  Oh, and while I had a little blip in my sleep cycle, I think I am back on track.  I'll be going to bed in a little more than an hour.  Sure, later than I really want.  Hmm... fine... I might go to bed in a little less.  Yes.

I have to get to town tomorrow.  Picking up shirts from the dry cleaner, returning a package, and writing a check into my more local account and finding out when that should clear to do a next step in paying off the debt.  If they say it is good immediately, I will have the needed information to send the check.  You never know.  Sometimes one just gets lucky.  Tech, sometimes, advances from before.

Another shower, though, before going in.  I am tired yet.  Just a bit undone.  I may be seeing a way to more.  I might figure something out I am missing.  I'll keep at it, again.  I have some things I am really hoping to get back to doing.  I even like to shovel, if I can.  I'll... get back to things as I may.  Good night.

I did see this morning.

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Who did the drive and walk, that is.  But I had just waken and am running so slow and rough that getting out to offer a thanks wasn't possible.  Someone will know.  Snow is arriving nearly daily lately.  The cold has been heavy and harder than usual.  No real problems, just how things go sometimes.  I honestly wonder if they haven't learned, to a degree, how to control weather for a short time in a small area.  Part of the reason for the drought might be an attempt to keep radioactive waters off the East Coast and even on inland.  Well, it's a theory.  Not one without... possibilities... either.  While seven or ten or whatever years won't do much with the halflifes involved, the ocean is a massive system for dealing with massive contamination problems.  That is a lot of time to wash a lot of stuff out and down.  And that stuff does sink well, and gets covered easily.  Anyway, perhaps they have decided to crack the bubbly... or let the water and snow fall again.  Then again, the West has always been spotty about moisture.

Oh, while down, I am beginning to go over old posts.  The first round will see me trying to heal broken links, or this or that.  Some things are just gone.  I'll tinker with it.  It is something to do.  I can't say I enjoy, though it isn't all bad either.  Busy work, though a bit more.  I ought to catalog things, and create backups.  But those things are a bit too much busy work, not quite my style, and I have no sure way to store such data and media even if I collected it.  I think, especially when some truly hate you and your work, things have to fail, grow old, and die.  I would guess even the true greats, if they survived this murderous world, were forced to watch their works stolen, corrupted, perhaps simply destroyed.  As unfortunate as it is, that is the way.  More so for some of us, even if we aren't great.  For now I work, tinker to keep the crumbling castle of thoughts as open as possible.

I think it's time to eat.  Good morning, and day.

That was just odd.

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For some reason I could not find myself to bed until after 3:00.  Something has been stirring, a hunger to more life.  Not so much did it attack and roust as sneak up on me while I wasn't paying attention.  I think a fuller meal situation is doing it's stuff.  I am not that hungry, if my mind realizes I had best get going with food again.  Actually, even to fast, I must eat a solid lot of food.  As odd as it sounds, one cannot truly fast on an empty stomach!  Through which, once again, I realize that God is a comedian of His own sorts.

I dreamed I met the heart of a lion, in a mouse of a woman, last night.  I am not surprised to see this live in a woman.  In this woman...  I wasn't sure about her.  Just as only few men contain the bones of the noblest beast, so it is with women.  Sometimes this is a good thing, sometimes...  Not every man can handle such a thing.  Not even other men with such a heart desire that in a partner.  The controlling personalities, on either side, face hardship when faced with a partner of magnitude.  Oh, she doesn't know yet.  For one who can see in the dark little remains hidden.  A warning?  I don't think so.  It is what I had hoped.  Why I went to see?  I heard of the dream of another, went looking for the source without knowing, and found as I am apt to do.

I don't think the dreamer ever believed.  She has reasons not to do so.  I have had my own doubts.  And, yet, the impossible can be seen from here, here being everywhere, even by one blind to his own future.  Or not?  The thing is, she is beginning to believe, believe so hard she dreams.  I didn't know what, at all, for sure, until I went to see.  Yeah... I am that kind and work in that way.  She should know, it isn't just for reasons she understands.  But as a child before a real fairy godmother, reasons matter little to a true heart.  Or a heart poured out in pureness?  Right.  Yes, I see.

Well... today?  Today.  I don't quite rightly know.  Four hours of sleep leaves me just a bit slow to boot up this morning.  Later.