Not much today.

.
.
I don't always like that.  Today I didn't mind.  I needed the rest.  Little music, only some gaming, mostly drifting through the Internet, which seems to be closing shop.  News is mostly going left, only a few blogs hanging on, probably going to use the EU to shut of more sites.

No, not much.  Still working with the bloody nose.  Since the nap, perhaps before.  It just won't stop.  I will end up going to bed with it.  Blood sugar is finally down, to 136.  BP has remained middling all day.  All readings have dipped about 10 off their highs.  I missed morning meds, but those are water pills.  I can miss those occasionally without fuss.  I do like having my pulse down, 145 is crazy, 82 is doable.

Even with the nap I am going down earlier tonight.  I am hoping to wake much earlier too, but it often doesn't work that way.  Good night.

A good nap.

.
.
Started at 15:00-15:30, going to 18:00?  A bit long but well needed.  I've pushed my body hard this week.  Two days, perhaps three, of work, then two days of driving long spells, and the emergency room.  The nap eased some of the soreness and stiffness.  The neck is up to 65% or so?  I must have slept exactly wrong on it and not moved that night.

I called my mother, but she didn't answer, before napping.  She probably didn't answer.  Called after the nap and she was there.  She has a cousin and his girl type friend over, putting a new grill together.  Not enough nuts and bolts, poor instructions... another life in the day.  Still, I am certain it will work out.  I caught them just as they were taking a break before heading to the hardware store.  My bet is someone is getting fed from the grill tonight too.  Just good to check in from time to time.

My blood sugar isn't tops today.  Yes, fasting.  It was 199 fasting, 198 before the nap, and 160 after the nap.  Fasting today, tomorrow, and maybe Monday.  I would like to make more bone broth.  That... and sometimes raw whole cream... helps with fasting, in small amounts, rarely.  Plus it offers a softer exit food when coming off a multi day fast.  I may still have some, if it's still good.  Only one way to find out.

BP is 156/106 p. 85.  Once a day, now, I measure both arms.  The left has always been five to ten points shy of the right, on most readings.  The pulses are normalizing to each other, almost.  I tried left arm first, then switched to see if there was psychology involved.  While not definitive, as observing may have an affect, I am satisfied that the left arm provides a lower real reading.  Still, one random reading a day, variously first, I take a reading from each arm.  Oh, and I figured out how to set the date and time and use the memory function on the contraption.  Good, good.

I've got a monster of a bloody nose.  Probably weather related.  Storms, if usually though not always big or powerful ones, will, can, do it.

It looks like rain might be arriving, or just a dust storm?  A little rain would be good.  More, if not extended, would be better.

Later, probably.  If you don't read from me in a few hours?  Wait longer.

Ouch. Good signs.

.
.
What isn't stiff is stiff and sore.  My whole body is tight, like a giant knot.  From my waste up those knots are taught to pain.  Except my neck, if that still doesn't have full mobility, is rather taught.  Improving.  Now, both the stiffness and pain are precisely what are desired.  And a sort of hollowness, as if my body is partly insubstantial.  I can't explain it better, but if you have ever been in at least coached athletics at even the highschool level, and you actually applied yourself, you know this.  If you lived for things in that range, you might know that humble beat-down sense for years at a time.  Or so it seemed.  Being in top-flight shape is NOT about feeling "good".  It's about always hurting, up to and including injury, but carrying on quietly, ably.

I couldn't sleep until, perhaps, 1:00.  I woke at 9:30.  I was a bit too sore to sleep.  Which is fine.  Readings aren't great, but were taken and recorded.  Not great?  Compared with what?  Other people, true... myself over the last few months, false.  Fasting today.  If help shows, he might get a steak.  Thawed but fasting, don't want to risk that meat going bad.  Fasting, and mostly resting today and tomorrow.

Ah, another good sign.  I grabbed a shirt, for over my T-shirt, yesterday.  While I don't go all in dapper, I do attempt some civility.  Anyway it fit almost loose.  If it was an 2xl tall... it still meant I had lost.  If it was the single extra large tall... it meant I lost a lot of size.  Last time I tried that size, it didn't fit well by itself so definitely wouldn't have worked with a t-shirt.  It bugged me all day yesterday.  I was so flat when I returned I forgot to check.  Just now, yep, the single extra large, and easily over the t-shirt.  Shoulders probably exempt me from just a large, but I may be headed towards fitted!

I need to go to a good clothier.  I am way out of what had been my dress clothes.  By, say, six to eight sizes... no taking that much in.  Slacks, even shirts.  Oddly, the neck is the same... plus stiff.  ;p  I looked like a hobo or clown last time I tried to dress up, with enough extra material I could also have passed for a landbased sailing vessel.  A pair of slacks or two, an inexpensive intermediate suit, a couple of dress shirts, and maybe belts or suspenders.  I like loose shirts but there are serious limits.

On to a slow day.  Never did fold laundry or do dishes.  Without else, those should be easy enough.  If the boss shows today?  Some work in the garage and living room.  If not, just rest and light duty.  Cheers.

Another trip to the VA.

.
.
The eye doc this time.  I let them dilate my eyes.  They really like looking into my eyes.  Another appointment in a few months.  Oh, this time I wrote what information I needed, then checked it with the prescription.  They weren't going to give me some measurement, which I only got through insistence.  I wonder if the forget, or mean to forget... don't want us shopping around?  No worries.  I am ordering a pair, maybe two if cheap enough, soon.  I'd like several bifocal and several plain, for now.

I keep trying to figure out rush hours.  If I don't leave about two hours early, I always end up late.  If I leave even just an half hour early, I will be late.  Now, when I leave way early?  I arrive very early.  It doesn't seem to matter when my appointment is.  Annoying, I suppose it just is what it is.

Blood sugar is 138.  I am about to eat.  Yes, it is Friday.  But with the work yesterday and driving today, I need food.  Perhaps I can fast tomorrow.  BP, 132/102 p. 96.  Not too shabby.

Neck is getting better.  I work it when I can.  Doesn't hurt on the outside as it had.  Still have very limited range of movement, if vastly better.  Driving was that much more of a chore.  Still, did it.  Later, or good night.

Well, that was a serious work day.

.
.
It wasn't just what was done, it was the heat, the neck cramp, not really being up to work, the combination of those things, and maybe more.  Working the other day, even bits the day before.  It adds up.  Oh, I got a shower but no laundry folded.  The shower was divine.  Helped the neck too, a bit.  The neck is improving, but still required aspirin last night and this morning.  You should know how much I hate pills by now.  If I can, I would usually much rather suffer.  That just isn't an option.

BP reading was 142/101 p. 83.  Meh.  But resting blood sugar was 164!  I even had an ice cream cone yesterday.  The pulse is what used to be my normal, always a bit fast... a hummingbird heartbeat, especially for a giant.  But the blood sugar has me excited.  I really need to get swimming going.  Medicine taken, tea, and waking now.

I am feeling it today.  I definitely did some work yesterday.  Nothing stands out and yet pretty much every muscle group got hit.  It's like an aura of sensation, a warm glow.  I remember this!  I used to have this almost all of the time, only much more intensely.  Not warm, hot, always.  Radiant, women could feel it from me, it... they liked it, a lot.  Wanted to get closer, moths to a flame, I said to more than one, with a terrible grin. Such odd memories.

Today.  Some scheduled events?  I'll... figure it out when I wake.  Later.

A goodly bit more.

.
.
Even with help, the rest of the processing was quite a chore.  I did some branching, but took over the chainsaw when that came out.  While he went to branching and loading, I made it half way through cutting the logs into usable sized parts.  He had to go do pipes, farming watering pipes.  He suggested he would be back, so an half hour into his believed hour of work I put potatoes in.  A quarter hour later I started the grill.  The grill had to bet lit twice, then a lower cooking platform had to be used.

On his return, we gathered the last branches to go to the town receptacle.  I had, after a break, finished with the chainsaw, put the logs in a wheelbarrow, scratched the rest of the debris into a pile ready to add to the rest, then put the chainsaw up.  We got that in and all of it deposited.  Then got the ac in the window upstairs, ate, then gave Sassy her minor trim.  I think he liked pork grilled.  He left with an empty plate and blankening stare.

My neck is still rough.  I didn't see any swelling.  I keep taking aspirin as possible.  Working heavily has loosened it up a bit, and numbed me too.  If it is still bothering me I will bring it up at the VA.  The cost for private oncology(?) is out of my league, or even ent.  Hopefully it just goes away.

I think everything on my list was hit, save dishes and a shower.  I am hoping a break will get me in shape to shower then finish folding laundry.  Yeah, I worked today.  With some help, and push, I am doing solid work, if only a few days a week and only a few hours a day.  And... in 38 jeans.  Hell's yeah.  If it doesn't kill me it'll... cripple me.  ;p

Later, or good night.  Hmm, I'll take medicine now, so I don't forget.  Readings can hang if I crash.  Priorities.

Not everything and all of each, but I am getting there.

.
.
The only things that haven't been done at all are dishes and a shower.  I did start late.  I haven't completely finished the wood, but there was a lot more than appearances indicated.  And size was deceiving.  I did get an half of the branches parted, all major branches off the trunks, and all the groups into their own stacks... mostly... to all of those.  Ran plumb out of steam.

At least I couldn't do more of that.  I was able to transplant one of the horseradish plants.  Watering it in well and giving the asparagus a sip while at it.  If it is doing well in a week I may move the other bulb over.  Wasn't willing to risk both of the last two of four roots.  Then I watered the remaining root still in the big planter.  Didn't need much before draining.  Still, may have disturbed it when removing the other, and just because.  Be good to your growy things, green or not.

Oh?  Oh!  I blindly grabbed a pair of jeans from the stack.  I have 44's down to 38's.  I thought I'd be getting a 42.  They, especially, are whatfor belts.  But no, 38's.  I... almost put it back.  Me ego can be a fragile little petunia.  I have, once, since I bought it during a weight loss streak, been able to put them on, to and including buttoning and zipping, but not functionally wearing them.  Man corset things just don't fly.  Still, curious.

I got a leg in.  Almost a sign.  Seemed rather close though.  Then the other leg in.  Okay, tighter.  Is anyone else conditionally claustrophobic?  Was it the jeans, though, or history, memory?  What if I get them on but can't get them off!  The top button through?  Good.  Good!  Zipper... yep.  But, can I move, or more importantly breath?  Yes, and... yes!  It looks tight but I was able to work well enough in them.

I won't claim the size just yet.  I can wear them today, but is today a skinny day?  I am sure it isn't a fat day.  It could be a middle day.  Whatever else it is it is two definite things.  It is exciting and it is incentive.  The goal is a 34 waste.  Only four more sizes, down from 44's or 46's, I was pushing one of those two when I moved here.  It's getting there, if I look fatter in 38's than 44's.  Bleh.

After this and a break, I'll crack on dishes, perhaps do some laundry, maybe hit the wood pile again... going to need the chainsaw for some of it.  The shower will have to wait until the end of the day.  I did get medicine, midday reads, and then an oatmeal lunch.  Not great, just... just.  I'll be taking an after meal blood test shortly.  Curious how oatmeal, old fashioned, does... a cup of dry, then cooked, with about a cup of milk. - After three hours, bloos sugar is up 10 over premeal.

Well, on to my break.  Later.

A bit of a ugly thing already... so far.

.
.
Hmm?  Oh, the day, younglings.  I woke late, a quarterish to nine.  Going to bed well past midnight makes it fair, if still late on a localized timeline... mostly, barely?  As well, my neck is still knotted.  Either I have a charliehorse in there, or a gland problem.  I am definitely hoping for a muscle problem, which it probably is.  Hurts a lot to swivel in any direction, even swallow.  I had to take aspirin just to begin working it, in an attempt to open it up.  The pain is inside, and out, of my body.  It centers on the right side of my neck where my jawline meets the neck proper, actually an inch into and below the jawline.  Not a good spot.  Although also exactly where a kink would form from looking at the tv while gaming too long.  Which... yeah.

As for readings.  Not the worst, or best.  I am hoping to be up to fasting this weekend.  That would help some, maybe all.  Especially if I can do Friday through to eating Monday.  In time, with potassium back in the queue, I'd really like to try five or six days.  I'm betting three weeks wouldn't be bad.  It is figuring what foods to get back to after.  What I have been told is false, much of it.  Potatoes are fine, as are most vegetables and at my serving sizes.  Steak and lamb are excellent.  Milk is at least okay, if volume is more of an issue, though with each item and all combined.  Smaller bites.  Still, learning foods, if no reason not to cocurrently explore fasting, which more importantly enhances a good spiritual life, makes the walk with God a bit... more pleasant in an odd way.  Oblations, alone, as all Father receives and the while, add even greater togetherness.

Today?  Wought is this today business?  :p  Well, I'll do dishes, fold the laundry, replant one or both horseradish plants, process limbs and the small trees, take a shower, and... be ready for work and dinner later.  Putting ac upstairs, removing wood, maybe work on the gutters... oh, and trimming the last bramble on Sassy 's back.  She has gotten much better at taking care, just a little help from time to time.

For dinner?  Just a butt roast, pork, potatoes, carrots, milk, and maybe cottage cheese and pears?  Yeah.  He has had my main foods, grill regulars, save pork and lamb.  Even my chicken is good, if I remember TO NEVER BUY CHICKEN (OR SEAFOOD) ON MARKDOWN!!!  Sale, yes... but look, smell, check dates.  Chicken is not... times out almost before the sell date, definitely by flavor/texture.  Time crunch sale?  Never.  I have two packages in the freezer I'll be throwing Sunday.  Actually, they aren't bad, just not tasty.  I ought to see if a neighbor might want some for a dog.  I'm no dog hater.

By feel, no swelling on the neck, or heat.  I'll look in a bit.  Tea and medicine, plus waking.  Oh, I realized how to explain what my conditions collude toward, summed, while dreaming.  The dream was sorting symptoms, as if discussing with myself, others, the universe.  It would be as if superman came from earth and went to Krypton.  Just barely able to survive, in a gravity field at least multiples higher than that of my original home.  I can never fully rest because I am always being squeezed, even while I sleep.  Always, everyday, every moment.  Torture.  I know that.  And, still, I have learned to love even this life, to abide and thrive in suffering, and to cherish hope in my life and for others who suffer.

It's STILL a ugly day.  ;p

Later.

Not much.

.
.
I made lunch, am heating up the grill for supper.  Ribeyes, corn, potato, and milk for lunch.  I was going to just have steak, but my blood sugar was 170 for no good reason, so I went all in.  Phuc eet.  Checking premeal, it is 130?  Yeah, bigger hammer.  Tonigh I am having lamb chops and snapped green beans.  I took bp earlier, but forgot to record it.  It was 141/94 p. 92, or so.  Mostly.  Currently it read 150/99 p. 85... left arm was 10/10 and 5 lower than right arm so I took it.  Doctors and nurses do it all the time, and use the other arm if it reads lower.

I dug holes to transplant horseradish into, cooked, got laundry going again, and did a few odds and ends.  It's a dark day, partly to all cloudy.  It is warming, if not at great speed.  I am so used to the low 70's now, that as it cools for the night, from nearly 72 inside, I almost catch a chill.  When it jumps to the 80's and 90's, I'll be a low dog again. For now all good.

I may try to do the dishes tonight, and finish what laundry there is.  It isn't a lot, but it would be something.  Got a pull in my neck, along the right side.  Bad enough I took a handful of aspirin.  It isn't helping.  Oh, medicine.  I've been doing that, well, if I sort of already almost mostly had been.  Just a bit better.  Brushing, showering, meds, general care, on to more work, with swimming soon.  I may see if the VA would cover that.  They offered once.  Maybe even help with pedicures.  If something will go first, it is the feet.  One major issue, and just the specialist visit would be more than a lifetime of pedicures.

I am going either way.  A health go getter helps them do their job.  The worst they can say is no.  And, if I keep up on readings and logging, it'll show... interest.  Yeah, I'll let them help me, now that I don't feel so boxed in by them.  I will not give up private care, entirely, ever again.  As to sharing info?  Other than medicines, and only if my Doc wishes it.  The VA can be a real mess, even danger, to work with.  They have good points and bad, but are Juggernaut Legion if they go against you.

Someone has been digging deep, far, long.  The harder nuggets of music.  Some of them.  I have to guess, by the nature of what surfaced, they have some zeroes in some areas.  They didn't show up on blogger, which tells me they are still cutting my hits, drastically.  Unless the purveyors are system spies, or turncoats.  I'd love to think I will help gut the politically left big tech one freed, ball dropping mind at a time.  Women?  Useless.  But the ones worth the price of admission will find, not where the boys are but, where real men are.  Let them keep the cat broads.

Hmm?  Dinnertime.  Good night.  Oh.  I'll put up the batch of tunes tomorrow.  Or later?

Work makes sleep pay?

.
.
I think so.  Down right at 22:00, up right at 7:00.  Still tired, if that is why it is called morning.  They just dropped the "u" to try to convince us it is a good, or better, time.  Dreamed.  Funerals.  The last was the most difficult.  My mother makes a wonderful and terrible mourner.  No more details, just in case.  Though, if it will, it will.

Resting blood sugar is 198.  Morning bp 141/101 is and pulse is 77.

Today?  Stuff.  Well, limb processing.  Perhaps work on the gutter system.  Dishes, shower, laundry, and getting packages ready to go.  I should have something to eat while at it.  I am not eating much or well, if I need to try.  I may also dig holes to transplant the horseradish.  As well, water the starts just a bit again.  Unless it is raining, or has.

All good.  Later.

Just a bit more.

.
.
I wrangled garden hose around, to water what has been planted.  Not a lot, just five minutes or so.  I will have a lot of asparagus.  Probably a ton of jerusalem artichokes too.  Horseradish?  Probably enough for a village.  Hopefully this year I will harvest some of all, if not everything.  Asparagus should be ready in 2020.  Advertised to be ready next year, I'd rather let it have another year... probably.

A few other minor chores while out.  Sam sure enjoys the company.  But does she have to express her incredulity EVERY time I step out?  :p  It is starting to look like someone lives here.  I am hoping to get the limbs processed and hit the eves again.  If the compressor does well enough I may not need water.  We'll see.  If I can do those, then hauling wood out and installing ac, perhaps transplanting one horseradish plant... both?

After popcorn, blood sugar rose to 180.  Couldn't eat much.  Hungry yet not.  Took blood pressure before meds, 160/11 p. 86.  I'm staying up just a bit to see if meds have a quick affect.  I just don't know how fast that works.  I created a little note book of printer paper.  I have been trying both arms.  No difference so I haven't been adding the second reading.  I'll check again, now, after an half hour.  No later, bed is calling.  147/102 p. 87 - maybe, or just falling to sleep

Good night.

Only an hour?

.
.
Glad for the help I can get.  The gutters weren't what I thought.  Rather than trays, the back porches are panels, from upper roof overhangs angled down and out several feet, then more to aluminum end pieces which roughly channels water out.  We couldn't just scrape all out.  The air compressor was used.  May need to spray water, let it dry, then use the compressor again.  Once it is cleaned to metal, it should clean easier every year or two.  I'll take responsibility on this one.  It took years to just figure out my lawn, remember.

After, or while the compressor was charging/recharging, we planted the rest of the asparagus.  While late and stunted, asparagus is growing into the old patch too.  I will have more asparagus than... I don't know!  Lots of it.  All good, if I am worn.  The sort of tired I like.  If I do anything else today, it will be inside, light, and little.  Maybe or not.

I would like to get packages ready for return, hit just what dishes are ready once then reset, see what laundry is doing, and maybe a shower.  I am pleased with today.  I have even started organizing.  Work gloves, goggles, knee and elbow pads, all go in one of the small tool duffles.  From now on, things will be finding their places, especially toolwise... or, actually, everything.  It's been going that way for a bit.

Dinner?  I am almost hungry.  Maybe just popcorn.  I did take morning medicine, blood sugar, but forgot bp.  I'll take it after I rest.  Blood sugar is 160.  Medicine and readings for certain tonight.  Later.
--------------
BP 144/92 Pulse 91 - Gooder(tm)

Not a bad start.

.
.
It took a while to start.  Closing on 15:00?  Anyway, mowing is done, the sprinklers are roughly set, if there are only two areas to be watered.  Still, set up for as needed and more.  As well, I have branches in a pile, for easy processing when I get to that.  No need to weed whip today, as I see things.

Oh a visitor with an offer, and I with homework for him.  Eggs?  Yes, already.  Duck eggs?  Absolutely!  As well as chicken eggs.  Do you have any idea of the rarity?  I have honestly dreamed of these, never really thought...  Yes, yes indeed.  And thank you.  As to homework?  Iron sights.  He gets to set those up.  Give a man an assignment, then he isn't just along for the ride.  Invested.  I'll do the scope.  Need to do my own homework.

I have begun researching spotting scopes.  Sure, Swarkovski.  Sure, $$$$$, plus tax, title, shipping, etc.  I've found an $800 I like.  Now to find as close to it for half, give or take a bill.  As close as possible.  Not for real soon, if maybe by fall.  It's the only way to fly.  A bit of a break, then I'll see.  Later.

Down late, up late.

.
.
It makes obvious sense.  All the driving and fuss yesterday wrung me out too much to sleep.  I think it was 3:00 when I was finally able to sleep and 9:30 or 10:30 when I woke.  Fasting blood sugar was 201.  I ate at Red Robins, then had a roast beef meal on the way home.  Is RR going downhill?  Though, even cooking burgers, myself, when I knew all was as good as it gets... and the burgers tasted... just like RR's.  I wondered if it's a bad time to buy burger, if my taste buds are off.  Mushy, mealy, old.  Or... It's me.  So if it is the meat, it seems universal.  If it is me, it is ongoing.

The waiter was way too gay for my tolerances.  He, wisely, understood, dialed it way back, understood who was paying, did his job sufficiently, and was properly enumerated.  Would have preferred the delicious blond, even with tatts.  And, yes, she would have gotten more.  Still, keep your problems to yourself, do your damn job, and I'll be fair(ish).

It's dark.  At least partly cloudy, last I looked?  Just waking, didn't check the whole sky.  Will check to see if it is dry enough to mow in a bit.  If I can, that.  Maybe weed whipping, perhaps branch and actually small tree parcelling.  Then, later, a few odd light jobs.  If everything is wet, I'll hit it on a sunnier day.  Perhaps do indoor work.

I've had three packages go missing from amazon lately.  One here, two to my mother.  Mother's Day was a bit anemic, if she got the big present but more seemed happy that I even remembered.  I'm not sure what is up.  Having to use reviews as the other request systems require I return... something.  If I didn't get anything how can I return something.  Required to return what wasn't received.  Hoping to get this sorted.  It happens, but usually very rarely.

Oh, well.  On with the day shortly.  Good morning, still, here, barely, and good day.

A long day.

.
.
A dental appointment.  Turned into an E.R. visit.  B.P. was 188/118.  Pulse at 145.  I told them that IS better.  No telling some people.  To the principal's office I went.  After a while, on my own, it dropped to 141/91 with a pulse of 108.  Or... so it seemed.  Whatever.  Yeah, I get it.  But I have been doing better on meds.  It really IS down, a lot.  That's a nearly 40 point drop.  It had been 224/126, if I didn't catch the pulse.

A stern talking-to, again.  Didn't my other doc...  Collusion...  Rigged...  I'm not even smoking in the boy's room anymore... or... anywhere else.  They finally let me go, just in time for the traffic crush.  No major problem.  I even ordered potassium today, picked it up on my way home.  All else is good.

I hope to mow, then set up the sprinklers tomorrow.  Perhaps handle some branch processing.  That would leave room for cleaning gutters, planting the new asparagus, and putting in the new ac unit.  I'll be buying another one this coming month, perhaps another after that, also this coming month or next.

I'll keep at it.  Days are days again.  I best use them as possible.  I did pick up packages at the post AND finally got utilities paid, with checks out for a year signed sealed and delivered.  If I can get to it again, I'll do another year.  It's the only way I can keep up.  Was only a month and change late.  I even got trash out, then brought the bin back before leaving.  I wouldn't want to eat from it, but if forced, it doesn't stink, other than that plastic smell.

Oh, yes.  I did well today.  I even flirted up a dozen birds.  Dames are screwy.  Which... has it's advantages, especially for Louies.  :p  Made one guy so jealous somehow he split with a huff.  Hadn't even started working the room.  It's just dames were including me in his discussions, with nothing but a glance from my way.  Good night.

Monday? Why?

.
.
Why indeed.  Because, I believe, is the correct answer.

Fasting blood sugar is 192.  Not all my fault.  Actually I couldn't eat much supper, or lunch.  It isn't about consumption.  My body, as a device, is ooc, not working.  I can eat, a bit, but it just sits there.  My body isn't working.  It isn't fully disabling currently, it does slow things down.  I'm not sure what the root cause is, or if it is a group of smaller things.  I really suspect, at this time, it is the body.  It doesn't seem to matter if it is warm or cold.

I am sort of back on medicine.  I miss a bit much, not too much for a restart.  But this doesn't feel like medicine.  Weather is beginning to switch to summer, but not in fast large volleys.  This has been one of the tamer springs, if colder, in memory.  It actually helps.  Something is just wrong, not terribly, just annoyingly.

A shower, shortly.  Tea, after an half hour... to let the mouth wash do it's thing.  Oh, perhaps getting trash out, and getting the checks going for utilies.  Yeah.  Perhaps mowing this morning, before a shower?  Some will be done, some not.  Looks to be turning into a good day.  Later.

Can't fast.

.
.
Burgers earlier, around noon, more like 10:00?  Grilling chicken now.  I do love grilling, especially as it warms.  It's 75 out there, the warmest in a while.  Maybe, from what I have seen, as warm as it has been?  I might have missed hot days, with my schedule off.  If hot days mess up my sleep, so I notice.

I've fed the girls twice today.  Fatted calf for the prodigal girl cat.  The festive mood is part of what is throwing fasting off.  I'd love to make potato salad, I'm just not quite up to it.  Green beans and milk are the sides.  Maybe pears and cottage cheese as dessert.

Gaming today.  I simply can't do more.  I have been going out with Sam.  She's a bit unhappy about Sassy's return.  And I need to get used to being outside.  I would like to mow, but not today, tomorrow is claimed, perhaps early Tuesday, if I can get up and get going?  I just... want it.  I'd like to start doing it more often.  Hmm, I ought to get the weed whip going as well.  It doesn't have to be quid pro quo, only when I fail.  I'll... aim that way.

Oh, I think I forgot to set the timer.  The grill should be ready.  Later.

Guess who is back!

.
.
The same distant meows.  Some disturbance at the front door this time.  I went to the front door, turned on the light, opened it, and... nothing.  I suspected a tom, trying to get Sam to come out and play?  And the meowing?  The same, or just very distant goat or lamb, maybe calf, calls... confused from distance.  Oh well.

Still, as I do, I was thorough.  I went to the back door, turned on that light, opened it.  Without hope, but strongly, confidently, I called her name.  Something came at me, quickly.  Spooked me, I really wasn't sure what was approaching.  It looked like her, or a raccoon.  Meow!  It was definitely her!

She meowed for her first half hour, searching here, there.  Sam... avoided.  I know Sam missed her.  But, too, came to the notion that she was gone.  Much like seeing a ghost, even of a loved one.  Adjustments had to be made.  I fed her right away, after she toured the place.  Inspection, you know.  She still meows off and on, trying to be sure she really is home?

She seems to be in very good health.  She hasn't starved, if she may have lost just a bit.  She isn't ragged at all.  Well, she is back.  More, I am sure it was her meowing before.  She just ran away, not sure this was the right place.  Very good.  It will take some realignment, which is fine by me, not so much by Sam.  :p

Like it or not.

.
.
Yesterday I ended up hungry.  My resistance fell.  I ate.  It was actually a smaller meal, as the protein was a lamb chop.  My midday blood sugar was 144.  An hour and an half, after eating at 18:00, my blood sugar had jumped to 256.  Crazy.  I took my blood sugar then because I was crashing... had to go to bed.  Fasting blood sugar is 196.  Let's see if I can fast today.

Feeling just a bit (extra) ragged today.  Nothing too hard.  I may or may not get over it.  No major issue either way.  It's a mix, part minor headache, slight muscle and joint pulls here and there, a small exhaustion not handled by sleep, feeling a bit stretched... thin.  Not much by parts, but the sum mass adds to a general mild malaise.

I am, roughly, back on meds.  The weather is remaining on the cooler side.  I went to bed at 19:30, woke at 3:20.  Though the problem(s) may have nothing to do with anything.  Sometimes that just happens.  Whether it is luck or God's will which allows, or forces me, to remain, I do not live by natural means.  So, a slightly rotten day is at least to expected, and far more than I have.  In other words, for all the words written to apparently counter what I am about to write, actually I have no complaints.  The caveat?  On balance, given all else, in summation, I have no complaints.  Further, I am all but sure this too shall pass, probably before dawn.