Not better, yet.

.
.
At 181 fasting blood sugar was still high.  Consuming no coffee or sweetener yesterday, cutting calories, and keeping absolutely to keto, the strictest version of it, I had some hope this first read would be better.  I set an alarm for two hours, will check, eat, and dose then.  Why would my system be working flawlessly for nearly a month, only to fail without any changes to it?  However, that is something I have faced with all my illnesses, blind setbacks without rhyme or obvious cause.

Even if ejection fraction has improved, the heart is badly misshapen.  As well, other organs are at various stages of difficulty.  It is unknown if they can improve.  Some believe so, but without solid conviction.  Perhaps any of those organs simple require low function from time to time.  I don't have a better answer, especially after cutting all potential problems.  Well, except raising consumption, which I don't believe would help.

I will be adding even more of the righter foods, if not by a large amount.  A bit more fatty meat, more of the better veggies, a bit more chia, more frequency than volume.  Last month was a little tight.  This month is just a bit better.  Then next month is a bit better still.  Still tight, with a quarter of my income still being denied for political reasons.

Oh, I am trying various things for keto.  A seaweed snack, for instance.  The best I could find still used canola and another seed oil  (not the best) but along with olive oil.  All else is good.  You don't get much, perhaps zero carbs?  It is almost along the idea of eating spider webs, if salted with seawater, then having that flavor dehydrated into it.  At ~$9 for twenty packs, and it actually having a mildly satisfying affect as to hunger... plus it can be used as a potato chip replacement with a keto sandwich, it is sat.

The other thing I am trying is wild caught sardines.  They actually don't cost much more by the dozen.  But this first group is absolutely tops.  It wasn't excessively boiled in the can.  Of course, in olive oil.  If I could find it in it's own juices I would try it.  Quality sardines, wild caught and properly handled and processed, aren't the nast mushy excessively fishy tasting mongrels I used to know.  These are pristine delights, not requiring crackers.  I will be trying several other brands.  I wouldn't mind having a decent stock of these, enough for three packs a week for a year or two... 52 times... 104~156?  Yeah, I could do that.  And rotate, reorder after 50 are used.  A full selfcontained smaller meal.  Good with olives or pickles to ofset each others excesses.

Later.

Crazy.

.
.
With blood sugar high, I did nothing.  I didn't eat and drank only plain tea.  Two hours later, blood sugar read 257 in a continued fasting state.  *sigh*  It doesn't make a lick of sense.  I have one improbable possibility, that I can see.  Perhaps the straw I use has built up with sucradrops (liquid sucralose, about the only sweetener that has little blood sugar issues, mostly)?

Breakfast, bacon and eggs, was eaten, then a larger dose of insulin was taken.  I will also have a fatted tea, sans sweetener.  Then test two hours after.  I just don't think near fasting should do this.  Near fasting you ask?  Cutting calories to around the 1,500~1,700 mark, where a 20% reduction in calories, for weight loss, would be about 2,400 calories.  If I did the maths right, that would mean a 50~57% calorie drop.

If caloric reduction is enough, muscle can be cannibalized, which might produce insulin spikes, if I doubt they would reach anywhere near this level even with extended starvation.  No insulin at bedtime.  I just don't know.  I will use a new straw and new glasses/cups, see if that helps.  Barring that?  It may just be that flukes happen.  Later.

Slowing down.

.
.
No surprise.  While fasting, energy will founder.  It is a price worth paying.  Blood sugar is at 155 currently.  It's only a ~forty point drop but the day is only half done.  And it is nearing the working range it needs to be.  Twenty five to seventy five down and I am good.  They say sixty to eighty is okay, if I'm not sure I believe them.

One load of laundry through and to being put up.  Another load drying.  I had such a small load of white synths that I put them in.  I am sure I can get those two loads tonight.  I have to do one more load, cotton whites... towels.  I have washed, rinsed, and put away the dishes that were soaking.  I am wearing out, not sure I want to put another set of loads going.  I may push it through, but I need to push if I do.  I want a shower tomorrow, thus having the tub clear and towels done.

Why the tub?  It handles batches, instead of a batch, at a time, and I'm needing to work my way to the sink.  Actually, I have.  It is, now, just the volume the tub allows.  I put the batches in regular sink sized tubs, not all in the mongo tub... that's just too much.  It works.  Worst case, I could dump the tubs, shower, and reset... but as with having to backtrack while driving, that isn't favored.

Not bad, all in all.  I wonder if a nap... No.  I can tell I couldn't sleep.  Bleh.  I'll keep doing what I can.  Later.

Eight down, almost exactly.

.
.
I love that number.  Given health, that is optimal.  Six to six and an half used to be best, if it wasn't as sustainable as wanted.  Five or six days a week, at the former prime, then I'd need weekend low and slows.  As is, I don't have much control, only preference.  Sleep was very good.  No cats, work tuckered me out, didn't want cat drama or such.

First thing, laundry was started.  That is, finally, all dark cottons.  Sheets, towels, jeans, shirts... the vast majority of laundry.  Whites, woolens, and synthetics remain, maybe two white and synth, one wool.  After all is washed, I will change sheets.  Should have enough to go in with it for a load by then.  Ugh.  No extra loads until the last one is put away.  Rules work... if I abide them.

Then I hit dishes.  Everything soaking was hit a final time.  They are ready to be dried and put up, but I was through for the time.  I'm not officially awake yet!  I figured I would post, do morning routines, then hit them and put the next batches in.  I'm getting close.  I should finish dishes today, then be down to washing the stove and one, maybe all of, my counters.

I don't know how much other clearing and cleaning I can get to beyond these things.  Hopefully some.  Just picking a small area or two, hitting it hard, might work.  As well, one of the smaller trash cans needs washed.  I should set that to a soak after finishing this batch of dishes, before setting the next dishes.  As well, the bins need bags, most of them.  I think I can get a bag of trash out, and recycling.

Yeah, it's turning into a good work week.  If I can keep up, I can really catch up.  If I need naps, I'll take them.  No good pushing through just to say I'm not sleeping but then do nothing.  Far better to sleep eighteen hours and work four of the rest than to just sit for twelve or sixteen hours.  Although if I can work eight to ten on eight down, I'll be golden... until I fall flat on my face.

Fasting blood sugar is 194.  It's... coming down, I guess.  Keeping to one sweetened per three, and lightly, teas, and a.c. vinegar ketonics, and it will improve.  With the dishes being done, and stove opening, perhaps I can get stock going yet today.  I have enough for beef and chicken, I think.  Oh yeah, it is good stuff, and good for the body.

Good morning and night.

Good morning.

.
.
Down right around 13:30, up if roughly, poorly, at 20:30.  I will probably shake the rough start and get to work quickly either way.  I ache, am sore, a bit weak, with a headache, and just off beside.  Amen.  Pain, and endurance to sometimes work through it, is a wonderful grace.

The half dozen clothes remain.  The dishes were not washed, and there is much sorting, sifting, and tossing to do.  I am excited to get to it.  The plan?  Putting up the clothes, then starting that ready load - washing, rinsing, and drying the dishes, then setting the next load to go - hitting the living room for an hour or two, then, later, the kitchen for the same with the goal of sorting down to the table top.

Too much?  Probably.  Though that isn't all.  I also want to find my gun cleaning kit and shoe shining kit.  Then line up tasks I have for those.  When I wear myself too far down, those sorts of tasks can still be done.  I am trying to fill time, become my own boss as possible.

I need to wake a bit first.  Fasting blood sugar was 241 but fasting starts today.  By Sunday, if I work as hoped today and tomorrow, I will be out of energy.  Work helps with fasting, if you can do it.  I'd best get medicine down right away before I forget, as well as pain relief aspirin, and turn up the furnace.  The girls are enjoying a fresh catnipped sock.  Oddly, even Sassy is enjoying... I think for the first time I have seen.  I wonder if they get the munchies?  :p  this is the stuff I ordered with my better spices.  It's superior, maybe Sassy is exacting about her catnip?

Days and nights are spinning again.  I assume as spring nears, the chaos of life, light, and fluctuations in temps will do their thing.  It's been a rough winter, but not too horrible.  I was even able to keep up on the critters in the worst of the flu and the cold weather.  I am hoping spring will be better even so.  I really want to hit some trails before it gets too hot, then maybe on through some of the heat, and maybe swim - more so if it gets too hot outdoors.

Good morning and good night.

I knew, had to be.

.
.
I've been nibbling all day.  Breakfast, fatted teas, jicama, ribs and mushrooms, sweetened tea, and probably other things?  So, yeah.  Blood sugar was going to be high.  Why even look if you already know?  Well, because.  Fears can't be fixed, only problems, only if you know them, face them.  Sure enough, at 143 it was...  way down?  I am pretty sure that is the best reading since I started testing after falling ill, or close... certainly in the last weeks.

Is it that I wasn't eating enough before, or at times?  Actually, yes.  I think that was part of it.  Deprivation is not good, at least not half measures.  Either fast or... get off the pot.  I mean eat to satisfaction, if the right foods, or fast, don't try to go halvsies.  What else?  Ah, I wasn't eating enough veggies.  They do help clear certain debris, help organs function.  As well, I think apple cider vinegar has been helping... started to work.  I don't get that slow digestion that plagued me so roughly or occasional acid reflux from drinking so much.  Oh, and I am drinking less, down to a gallon or two, from four to six gallons a day.

I don't hit every supplement or consumable every day.  Simply not possible.  Every other, or third, or fifth day.  Or two or three days, then it is forgotten for a bit.  High fats, accelerated omega 3's, and some protein, as well as heavy vegetables now, with almost no other carbs, fast or slow.

Sure was tempted by fast food.  Half the reason I bought beef ribs.  It was used as the carrot since I didn't have a big enough stick.  Carrots and sticks are the only tools which might engage my ass... mule if you must, certainly not donkey.  Glad now that I didn't.  I'll bet I am in solid ketosis too.  Not showing up on the pee sticks, if at this point it probably just means I am fat adapted so my body is using the ketones.

Now to get bp into the green zone.  Can't say I'm not trying.  Good night.

Wasn't sure.

.
.
Back to bed at 4:00.  No clue when I would wake.  So far it looks like 10:30... assuming I am able to remain conscious.

A shower, perhaps some cleaning in there first.  Then I will think about things.  I am not exactly sure what all is wrong, I just know I am exhausted without reason, beyond reason, and even with right eating, reasonably good sleep, and medicine back on very good schedule, my stats are remaining awful.  Fasting, starting Saturday, is the last weapon in my inventory.  I will give it a couple shots before looking elsewhere.

Perhaps the new stuff I am trying isn't as compatible with keto as advertised.  Or is good, generally, only not for those with insulin resistance?  Most who try keto aren't coming at it with diabetes.  I will have to start weighing my foods, looking at exact macros, figuring out if fiber can be counted against carbs, at all, for me or not.  I won't be limiting, just weighing and logging.  I have been watching, guestimating, but that isn't good enough.

The thing either on my side, or against me, is my size.  I really am required, if not double at least nearing that number of calories over standard recommendations.  This includes macros?  If 20 carbs are generally good, I'm better at 30 to 40.  Though the ratio of that being 5 %  of total calories is more important.  Unless... 20 is 20 is 20?

I also need to keep intermittent fasting on track.  That has been troubling lately.  I can't focus, keep in sync.  It isn't that I am too cold.  This year, for the first in a long time, I am dressing warmly.  Socks, two pair if needed, long underwear and pants or pj's, at least a shirt, sometimes another shirt a sweater or a jacket, keeping the furnace right for sleeping then waking.  It's not perfect, but this is the best year I can remember.  It isn't helping, or as much as I had hoped.  But I know the cold can shut me down, but that isn't it.

Hmm... though part of the reason for better dressing is because I go out at least daily for the ducks.  I believed that would be good fot me.  I think it is.  Just noting one difference this year.  Yes, tending creatures, and going out in the weather, are very good for you.  It might limit, complicate, humilitate, but... these are all goods, as I see things.  Probably got me over the severe flu quicker this year, if I had to bet.

Hmm, the flu may still be a part of it.  Something that rough may just have gotten to me too deeply.  Though, maybe not.  Why bother looking?  I want to get better, and believe it is possible.  I refuse to quit, even if I can barely stand long enough to shower. I will not stop contemplating, acting on possibilities when able.  Ugh, though.  Later.

Finally.

.
.
Fasting blood sugar is 151.  At least the rest of today is fasting, though through Saturday, even Sunday, is hoped.  No more, not yet.  I am unsure of four days.  I can't be sure, about everything, but it seems either multiday fasting or insulin are the only ways.  I'd much prefer fasting, and it has to be coupled with intermittent fasting, to work.  Well, that and keto.  The problem is I have to be clear of mind, which... yes... means being well dosed on heart medicine.

It's a rougher gig than it sounds.  Like being forced to soldier with one arm tied behind my back, wearing an eye patch on one eye, carrying an extra useless forty pounds of weight.  I could yell,  "Not fair"!  But I, and everybody else, knows this, on both sides of the issues.  That is a given.  No one can help, or will.  Not in a way that could balance things.  Actually the only way to balance things, since I can't improve, would be to saddle everyone.  I am not misery, and don't care for company... certainly not that much.  *grins*

I had another type of ketonic yesterday eve.  I was not sure it would work, as it included a tablespoon of cream, though could use butter.  Turmeric, ginger, ground pepper (to absorb turmeric... stuff, pepper and fat are useful), well, in hot tea.  Not as tasty as had hoped.  Adding salt or a sweetener, perhaps ghee, might work.  Actually butter.  The ghee I bought separated.  I suspect it has oil.  I am trying to sort that out.  Anyway... it didn't bother blood sugar.

I am about to have a regular ketonic.  I might add a teaspoon of cream, just to try to kick over fat burning.  As mentioned, while I am positive I am making ketones, hugely, I am not sure they are being used.  Ugh.  My doubts hinge on high blood sugar while eating a high fat diet.  That leads me to suspect my body is breaking down dietary and muscle protein in the body.  Beside high blood sugar is foamy pee.  Yeah.

Which, among other things is why I am experimenting with other ketonics, herbs and spices, and food mixes.  I am, generally, avoiding supplements, going for foods and spices.  I ate and drank my way into some of this mess. It's the only way out.  It might even cure or improve my heart on the way through.  That wasn't my fault, nor was the extended lack of treatment.  Doesn't mean I can't treat it.  All doctors and medicine do, at this time, is help (if they deign) by buying some unknown chunk of time.  I have to do the rest.

Actually, from a human... or what passes for that in these quarters... perspective, I... enjoy this challenge.  Sure, I would rather be an engineer, brick layer, plumber, husband, father, even merc.  But this is what I have left.  It is dangerous, difficult, requiring risking health even life for small gains.  It is complicated, requiring learning, investigation on several levels, plus lab work, some of which I do.  That is to stay alive!  What do you do to stay alive?  Go to work?  Race you!  ;P

Well, enough for now.  Have a good morning, day.

Another shot at the ketonic.

.
.
This time I excluded lime juice.  Labelled as zero carb, zero calorie, obviously untrue.  This time I went with about a pint of tea, two tablespoons of apple cider vinegar, an quarter to half teaspoon of cream of tartar, and an half tablespoon of pink Himalayan salt.  Not as tasty, but still not bad.

My blood sugar has been dropping, if slowly, since... I think... 214 this morning.  It was 179 as I started consuming the ketonic.  I must admit, I was surprised I could consume a.c. vinegar on an empty stomach, while fasting.  I was able to consume this concoction quickly, less than five minutes.  An hour later, blood sugar continued it's fall, down slightly to 174.  Fasting remains simple enough.  And I am not freezing, or feeling cold, today.

Something strange?  Burping.  Which isn't necessarily strange, it was the taste... and a strange realization.  Although, for me, belching and passing gas, since Draino, maybe before, is rare... so actually it is odd.  Anyway.  The taste reminds me of a whiskey I used to greatly desire at times... need.  Or scotch?  Further, this vinegar scratches that vital need, but without drunkenness.  I know, crazy.  But true.  I must assume the whisky had some similar acid?  Fascinating.  I tell you, alcohol was the only medicine I had when doctors were trying to pacify me to death with bad medicine.

Oh, two hours on, blood sugar has dropped to 151.  I'll check the next hour, then at the three hour mark, from now... just to see if my blood sugar jumps for no good reason.  Just... checking.  The goal is two days fasting.  But if all is good, I might try three.  With this new ketonic to experiment with, maybe four?  I'd like to figure a way to extended fasting.

I'm not interested in trying to learn to live on sunshine, moonbeams, and air.  I just want a tool through which to quash diabetes.  Again.  I can't become "catatonic" anymore (quotes, as it wasn't true catatonia, as my mind is as you now perceive it, it just couldn't express itself through a nearly dead body).  Becoming catatonic I was able to nearly hibernate, thus starve, for weeks, even mostly months at a time.  Ah... such memories.

I thought to do an update on the ongoing fasting ketonic experiment.  Tomorrow I will risk lemon juice.  Though, perhaps next time I fast, I may try fresh juices of each sort.  This will also work for intermittent fasting, so as to not break the fast, yet have something beside tea.  Later.

Believer?

.
.
Depends.

Food advice in this case.  No?  Yes?  In this case, no.  If I have gotten good dope from an adviser before, I will give them more of my ear.  As I have mentioned before, belief isn't a requirement to induce or prevent action.  As long as there is time, exploration, investigation, and trials can be performed.

I do research on a variety of topics from time to time.  Too much reading and watching on single topics at a time and I begin to draw blanks.  Nothing sticks, nothing forms of what is going in.  Too much study can also do that, generally.  Jack has to play.  The recent topic I planned to review ended up being a hot topic.  It turns out to have uses even within fasting.

Apple cider vinegar, especially the type including the mother.  Actually, if it's just the acid, why the mother?   Anyway...  Why the curiosity?  First, that I learned to use it when making bone broth.  It helps leech the minerals from the bone.  This... seemed to hold potential for other purposes.  Something, something, my subconscious suspected something, just couldn't quite solve the puzzle.

Then, many advisers who had gained some trust, kept writing or doing vids on this subject.  I just didn't see this as primary and have had other research ongoing.  Until now.  Amazing.  I may have solved a major problem!  That of digesting, or not actually, meat.  Actually I have been having difficulty digesting anything.  Now, I am cutting meat, and other protein, a bit.  But beside loving meats, they are the best sources of protein, and often fat.

Fasting isn't always fun.

.
.
It started off a bit difficult.  It has gotten better.  Knowing it is a short, two day, fast made it easier, but it was already getting easier for no known reason.  Waking to seeming violence may have ended with hunger.  First adrenaline, then backing that down... extra hunger from the bodily functions.

Fasting blood sugar was 213, then dropped to 191.  I decided to try the fasting version of my warm tea ketonics.  It includes a ketone crystal mix, taurine, and an electrolyte powder.  All on trial, but supposed to be carb and calorie free.  I'll test in an hour, and then two.  If it's higher in two then one hours, I'll check again in three hours.  I am hoping for no, or a negligible rise.  Anything over fifteen and I'll begin checking which item it might be.  Labels simply can't be trusted anymore if blood sugar can just go squirrelly.

I haven't gotten to work.  Cold, baby.  I turned up the heat and dressed warmer.  About to add a jacket.  Sometimes it might be health, or hunger, or other such.  All I know is I won't work until I warm up a bit.  The warm tea should help.  I just can't get to things while so cold.  Taurine is supposed to help with energy while fasting.

Later.
-------

Good, so far.  I am just finishing the ketonic.  Still, it's been an hour since I started.  It's probably all good.  Blood sugar is 187 or a four point drop.  I'll give it another hour.  If there is no, or serious, swing up, I'll call it good.  I will still check from time to time.  It's how I do.  Trust but verify, continually.  You can never be sure enough.

Still cold.  More hot tea, maybe a few more points on the furnace.  Later.
------

Good.  Blood sugar dropped to 178, down nine more points.  I won't bother with a three hour check.  Three hours out I may check again.  Yes, I did have liquid sucralose with the hot tea.  It was carefully dosed at four drops in two quarts.  So, yes, occasionally, if dosed down.  Sometimes I simply can't drink without it.

Still so cold.  Tending the ducks, I read the thermometer... below zero, F.  The light wasn't good so I couldn't make an exact read.  I don't think the cold is anything but health problems.  Cold?  I am freezing.