.
.
My muscles hurt... leg, arm, shoulder, and back. Sore, and stiff as if I had been doing weights or swimming. Perhaps I did more than I thought. I don't mind. Given the physical proof of having seriously taxed my body, I can easily see that rest has been needed. I don't mind. Not at all.
Corned beef and cabbage is going. It's down to the last hour. I could have pressure cooked it, but with veggies and meat it would have meant more immediate effort if over less time. I might as well take morning meds before supper, as I attempt to stretch my day. It smells good, if you like said. I do.
I am so amazed with the bathroom. I did a small bit of cleaning after showering, before? Both. Just getting the bowl and around the base. I have enough whites to do a load. Two towels is all it takes, if I have more. Mostly towels and hand cloths, easy to fold etc. Yeah, I'll put that in as dinner finishes. Later.
Saturday, March 23, 2019
Some of it, again.
.
.
Running low on money, had to get groceries. First a shower. I will shave later. The shower drained me. And with the drive to town ahead I couldn't do both. Perhaps if I had hit it earlier. As was, I was down to having to push through. I dressed and headed right out. Cabbage, finally, salad makings, eggs as I am seeing if the hens will brood. Beef and pork roasts were both inexpensive and two-for-one. I am running very low on money, have two trips to the V.A., and am hoping to swim soon. But, couldn't pass those up.
It has been raining, perhaps with snow in there at times. The roads aren't slick, but a few areas can give concern. As written, all good. Someone is really going to town with hatred, I am sure of it. Perhaps many. I can't really sort it out. It isn't, mostly, my problem. I cut off their method of hate spamming. Now it's not my problem. I just... they are so erratic with the expression of their hatred that it just, I can't pinpoint who, or why... mostly... probably. I do realize, given womens' nature, it might not be at all for the reason logic would indicate. Hatred is a feminine thing, dealing with a lack of logic and man's indifference and lack of understanding of the feminine. When it is pointed at us.
I had thought to work on the heels, but there is nothing to do. My feet are smoother still. I might be brutally tired, but some things improve. If, when I increase the new med, fail more, I will dump it. Meds are improving my health, if bp remains an issue. It isn't worth crippling myself on medication for ten points on bp. Swimming, hiking, and keeping up on the house are far more important. Though if half doses work, and I can push through, I might be willing to do that. I'll find out soon. It's been a week and a day since I got back on meds. Haven't missed a dose, if I did have to switch day and night doses, and will do that whenever necessary.
Ugh. Later.
.
Running low on money, had to get groceries. First a shower. I will shave later. The shower drained me. And with the drive to town ahead I couldn't do both. Perhaps if I had hit it earlier. As was, I was down to having to push through. I dressed and headed right out. Cabbage, finally, salad makings, eggs as I am seeing if the hens will brood. Beef and pork roasts were both inexpensive and two-for-one. I am running very low on money, have two trips to the V.A., and am hoping to swim soon. But, couldn't pass those up.
It has been raining, perhaps with snow in there at times. The roads aren't slick, but a few areas can give concern. As written, all good. Someone is really going to town with hatred, I am sure of it. Perhaps many. I can't really sort it out. It isn't, mostly, my problem. I cut off their method of hate spamming. Now it's not my problem. I just... they are so erratic with the expression of their hatred that it just, I can't pinpoint who, or why... mostly... probably. I do realize, given womens' nature, it might not be at all for the reason logic would indicate. Hatred is a feminine thing, dealing with a lack of logic and man's indifference and lack of understanding of the feminine. When it is pointed at us.
I had thought to work on the heels, but there is nothing to do. My feet are smoother still. I might be brutally tired, but some things improve. If, when I increase the new med, fail more, I will dump it. Meds are improving my health, if bp remains an issue. It isn't worth crippling myself on medication for ten points on bp. Swimming, hiking, and keeping up on the house are far more important. Though if half doses work, and I can push through, I might be willing to do that. I'll find out soon. It's been a week and a day since I got back on meds. Haven't missed a dose, if I did have to switch day and night doses, and will do that whenever necessary.
Ugh. Later.
Friday, March 22, 2019
Such... thoughts.
.
.
The videos or music populates, the puzzle pieces begin to fit, and even exhausted out of my gourd, it all still... becomes a representation of... a thought, a chain of them. Art?
.
The videos or music populates, the puzzle pieces begin to fit, and even exhausted out of my gourd, it all still... becomes a representation of... a thought, a chain of them. Art?
I can't get going.
.
.
I simply pushed too hard, ran too fast, burned too much energy. I can do little things, work for an half hour at a time, but not often. Nearly permanently winded, I tire and must sit after very little work. So I am taking it easy. Could it be the new medicine? I'm on half doses, as a recommended start. I will know for certain after kicking it up to full dose. If exhaustion gets worse, I will cancel it. Oh, I should start checking bp.
I did fold laundry, and sort a bit in the room. I also made a dinner run. I need to do some grocery shopping. Ugh. I haven't showered or shaved, will shortly. First thing. I have really kicked life up, on the little things. Brushing teeth four times daily, doing extra occasional processing on the tea stains. Showering and shaving every other day, plus or minus a rare day. Keeping up on dishes and laundry after catching up. I'll do a load of whites after my shower, as an example. Not enough of anything else, or I'd hit that. I look for medium loads, of anything, then hit it.
Little things, regularly. Even the trash... collected, outside, to the curb, and back. Plus tending critters and my own food. If I mess up, it's my own food. I forget to thaw, or enough... or too much. I don't have enough, or all the ingredients. Getting to town is... troublesome. I forget, or am broke. Ugh. But the little things are improved, even when exhausted. If I mess up, I pick up next time. Better. But still broken.
The heat is up, medicine is about to go down, the ducks and girls are about to be fed etc., then a break and a shower. So tired, but so beyond sleep. I am hoping to hit the bedroom, much harder than the last few days. We'll see. Gah, but it's been rough. I checked my blood sugar. It was impossibly high, improbably high, but down 150 in a few seconds... not trusting the meter to biology... will check after showering. Later.
.
I simply pushed too hard, ran too fast, burned too much energy. I can do little things, work for an half hour at a time, but not often. Nearly permanently winded, I tire and must sit after very little work. So I am taking it easy. Could it be the new medicine? I'm on half doses, as a recommended start. I will know for certain after kicking it up to full dose. If exhaustion gets worse, I will cancel it. Oh, I should start checking bp.
I did fold laundry, and sort a bit in the room. I also made a dinner run. I need to do some grocery shopping. Ugh. I haven't showered or shaved, will shortly. First thing. I have really kicked life up, on the little things. Brushing teeth four times daily, doing extra occasional processing on the tea stains. Showering and shaving every other day, plus or minus a rare day. Keeping up on dishes and laundry after catching up. I'll do a load of whites after my shower, as an example. Not enough of anything else, or I'd hit that. I look for medium loads, of anything, then hit it.
Little things, regularly. Even the trash... collected, outside, to the curb, and back. Plus tending critters and my own food. If I mess up, it's my own food. I forget to thaw, or enough... or too much. I don't have enough, or all the ingredients. Getting to town is... troublesome. I forget, or am broke. Ugh. But the little things are improved, even when exhausted. If I mess up, I pick up next time. Better. But still broken.
The heat is up, medicine is about to go down, the ducks and girls are about to be fed etc., then a break and a shower. So tired, but so beyond sleep. I am hoping to hit the bedroom, much harder than the last few days. We'll see. Gah, but it's been rough. I checked my blood sugar. It was impossibly high, improbably high, but down 150 in a few seconds... not trusting the meter to biology... will check after showering. Later.
Thursday, March 21, 2019
Heat is needed.
.
.
Laundry was cycled. I'll run the last load through the dryer a short spin soon. I am sipping a fatted tea. Sort of stuck otherwise, forgot to set the thermostat up. Freezing. Just hit it. I am planning corned beef and cabbage in a bit. A late St. Patrick's day, as is the case with many celebrations. It's as good as I can do.
It seems rest is still required. I pushed hard, too hard. Wanted to see if I was really better. Not so much. I have longer legs, but probably just enough extra under the hood to actually hurt myself. No better at keeping a day schedule, or any schedule, either. I may have stressed my heart. It hurts. Don't want to come to a complete stop, but can't hit it as hard as I had hoped, or hard at all.
A shower in an hour. I will reset laundry after this, then fold both loads while waiting for warmth before hitting shaving and showering, then probably another long break. If I can, I'd really like to hit the bedroom. Sorting, one or both storage units, and/or changing bedding.
While not hitting things whole hog, I am doing small pieces and parts, plus handling dailies. I am getting ahead. Has it been darker lately? Even with the sun out it can seem dark. Though, that might just be exhaustion? I don't know... too tired to sort it all out properly. No matter either. I just need to keep at it as I am able. Later.
.
Laundry was cycled. I'll run the last load through the dryer a short spin soon. I am sipping a fatted tea. Sort of stuck otherwise, forgot to set the thermostat up. Freezing. Just hit it. I am planning corned beef and cabbage in a bit. A late St. Patrick's day, as is the case with many celebrations. It's as good as I can do.
It seems rest is still required. I pushed hard, too hard. Wanted to see if I was really better. Not so much. I have longer legs, but probably just enough extra under the hood to actually hurt myself. No better at keeping a day schedule, or any schedule, either. I may have stressed my heart. It hurts. Don't want to come to a complete stop, but can't hit it as hard as I had hoped, or hard at all.
A shower in an hour. I will reset laundry after this, then fold both loads while waiting for warmth before hitting shaving and showering, then probably another long break. If I can, I'd really like to hit the bedroom. Sorting, one or both storage units, and/or changing bedding.
While not hitting things whole hog, I am doing small pieces and parts, plus handling dailies. I am getting ahead. Has it been darker lately? Even with the sun out it can seem dark. Though, that might just be exhaustion? I don't know... too tired to sort it all out properly. No matter either. I just need to keep at it as I am able. Later.
Awake but absolutely exhausted.
.
.
It was supposed to be a nap. Not a chance. I was going to sleep after that last post. Again, not a chance. It was three hours later, five? At least two, if probably closer to the first two guesses. I had slipped to far into that dread insomniac fog to know. I am sure I examined the clock out here, and the alarm, bot which run of the atomic clock signal. It doesn't matter how accurate they are if the mind can't generate enough short term memory for recall. Awake at 13:30, for whatever that means.
First thing, ducks. I think I forgot them yesterday. Because of the vagaries of my sleep pattern, the miss was between twelve and eighteen hours, not twenty four. Odd, but I think they doubled egg production! I am leaving eggs for now. It looks like they have sorted into three nesting areas. For now I am leaving them to it. I am not sure what to do, so... for now... natural is as it is.
That little bit totally winded me. What? That shouldn't have been a problem. Whatever. I will catch my breath and go from there. I keep being amazed by how clean the bathroom is. So pleased, I have been keeping up, cleaning the toilet just a bit near daily. I haven't, yet, officially, cleaned the sink or mirror. I finally found the glass cleaner, so that will be done before I shower and shave, which is my first chore today. Perhaps in a few hours. I thought I would be able to hit a lot more work... looks like not. I will do what my health allows.
I found the eyehooks and wire. I will seek the stud finder. As the rest of today, if a second and other winds can be had, will be about the bedroom. Well, and finishing laundry and putting up dishes when only small shorter tasks can be done. Tea, after brushing my teeth and cycling laundry, then a long sit. Air! I need air.
Oh, blood sugar is 294. Not great but beats the 330s and higher. My stupid sleep, and maybe excess sweetener while fogged in, are the problems? Maybe. I'll be careful. Chia breakfast, and a fatted tea, later a fatted broth. I need to thaw more of those. They aren't fantastic tasting... if not bad with herbs, spices, cream, and salt. It is knowing I am getting natural stuff my body needs, craves. I wonder how much bone broth has helped my feet, skin. The gelatin, minerals, and else, really can't be had in many other ways.
Later.
.
It was supposed to be a nap. Not a chance. I was going to sleep after that last post. Again, not a chance. It was three hours later, five? At least two, if probably closer to the first two guesses. I had slipped to far into that dread insomniac fog to know. I am sure I examined the clock out here, and the alarm, bot which run of the atomic clock signal. It doesn't matter how accurate they are if the mind can't generate enough short term memory for recall. Awake at 13:30, for whatever that means.
First thing, ducks. I think I forgot them yesterday. Because of the vagaries of my sleep pattern, the miss was between twelve and eighteen hours, not twenty four. Odd, but I think they doubled egg production! I am leaving eggs for now. It looks like they have sorted into three nesting areas. For now I am leaving them to it. I am not sure what to do, so... for now... natural is as it is.
That little bit totally winded me. What? That shouldn't have been a problem. Whatever. I will catch my breath and go from there. I keep being amazed by how clean the bathroom is. So pleased, I have been keeping up, cleaning the toilet just a bit near daily. I haven't, yet, officially, cleaned the sink or mirror. I finally found the glass cleaner, so that will be done before I shower and shave, which is my first chore today. Perhaps in a few hours. I thought I would be able to hit a lot more work... looks like not. I will do what my health allows.
I found the eyehooks and wire. I will seek the stud finder. As the rest of today, if a second and other winds can be had, will be about the bedroom. Well, and finishing laundry and putting up dishes when only small shorter tasks can be done. Tea, after brushing my teeth and cycling laundry, then a long sit. Air! I need air.
Oh, blood sugar is 294. Not great but beats the 330s and higher. My stupid sleep, and maybe excess sweetener while fogged in, are the problems? Maybe. I'll be careful. Chia breakfast, and a fatted tea, later a fatted broth. I need to thaw more of those. They aren't fantastic tasting... if not bad with herbs, spices, cream, and salt. It is knowing I am getting natural stuff my body needs, craves. I wonder how much bone broth has helped my feet, skin. The gelatin, minerals, and else, really can't be had in many other ways.
Later.
Nothing.
.
.
Almost nothing. There was a small load of laundry, synthetics, which have been washed. And the other load which was given a spin... should be through, I'll flip those shortly. I also made fresh tea, then had fatted tea with chicken. I will have the last of the roast beef with a fatted broth shortly. Oh and, well, I've done minor work in the bedroom.
After another meal, I need a nap. I hope for more work, but may end the day with sleep. I am terribly tired. Who knows. Maybe I can do more soon... yet today, tomorrow. I will get it this time. I am sure of it. So extraordinarily tired, worn. The heart feels better , from rest. Not a bad thing.
Later, or much later.
.
Almost nothing. There was a small load of laundry, synthetics, which have been washed. And the other load which was given a spin... should be through, I'll flip those shortly. I also made fresh tea, then had fatted tea with chicken. I will have the last of the roast beef with a fatted broth shortly. Oh and, well, I've done minor work in the bedroom.
After another meal, I need a nap. I hope for more work, but may end the day with sleep. I am terribly tired. Who knows. Maybe I can do more soon... yet today, tomorrow. I will get it this time. I am sure of it. So extraordinarily tired, worn. The heart feels better , from rest. Not a bad thing.
Later, or much later.
Hmm?
.
.
Of course I understand where from you most recently got the gist, as titularly notated, I simply don't particularly grok usage, or by whom. Sure, I can see with my eyes closed, just not everything. Less so when I am the target, or involved without... being in the inner circle. Hmm?
The muse herself? Perhaps a sister, a... a jealous sister. But hers or mine?
.
Of course I understand where from you most recently got the gist, as titularly notated, I simply don't particularly grok usage, or by whom. Sure, I can see with my eyes closed, just not everything. Less so when I am the target, or involved without... being in the inner circle. Hmm?
The muse herself? Perhaps a sister, a... a jealous sister. But hers or mine?
Wednesday, March 20, 2019
Whought?
.
.
Down, finally, around 10:0x to 10:1x? Definitely in that range, up at 16:30 to 17:00. Not feeling bad, surprisingly. A slight twitch in my lower right love handle area, more like a very minor back pain translocated there. Very strange, but a minor weird complaint I can live with. And, because there is such a dearth of other pains, I am noticing a slight pain in the right shoulder blade. I really thought I would wake in wracking pain. All good to wake rather rested and... good?
A call to my mother. She has something strange happening. Vertigo? I know of such, but as a reaction to height. When I suggest I fear heights, that is my main symptom. Whether driving out on a bridge with sweeping, unexpected, vistas dropping away, or up in a tree and looking down without thinking... or looking over the edge of the Grand Canyon, straight down a thousand or two thousand feet. Stomach lurch, knees... legs turn to jello, nausea, perhaps breathing issues as I can forget to breath, and that spin! Around and round we go! Anyway... Her's is not as bad, but sustained. It might be an ear or medicine thing. I'll be checking on her until it gets better. Her doc checked her out thoroughly, no stroke or other of the worst possibles.
Today? While doing quite well, I have been pushing. I am quite surprised nothing broke. I am not going to continue the extreme treadmill. Putting clothes away at a leisurely pace, clearing the bedroom, and putting up the storage units from now through the weekend. Actually, if I catch myself pacing too fast, I will slow down. For now the goal is two hours on, two off, doing actual work no more than six hours a day.
Even that might be pushing it, because I am allowing regular daily duties on the side. feeding, watering, and care for self and the critters, dishes and laundry as things gather... before they get out of hand, and other such. We will see how all works. Definitely doing better, if pushing a bit too hard. I can sense trouble if I don't throttle back at least a little, maybe a lot. Heart feels like it is... cracking. The clothes in the dryer should be done, just needing a short spin.
Fatted tea? Shortly. Cold tea and medicine first. Blood sugar is 284. High, but lower than any read since the 13th. I'll... keep that going. Chia and fatted tea. While early as per sleep cycle, my sleep cycle is off. So... I don't mind eating "early". Yea, sleep oddities make the world messy. Later.
.
Down, finally, around 10:0x to 10:1x? Definitely in that range, up at 16:30 to 17:00. Not feeling bad, surprisingly. A slight twitch in my lower right love handle area, more like a very minor back pain translocated there. Very strange, but a minor weird complaint I can live with. And, because there is such a dearth of other pains, I am noticing a slight pain in the right shoulder blade. I really thought I would wake in wracking pain. All good to wake rather rested and... good?
A call to my mother. She has something strange happening. Vertigo? I know of such, but as a reaction to height. When I suggest I fear heights, that is my main symptom. Whether driving out on a bridge with sweeping, unexpected, vistas dropping away, or up in a tree and looking down without thinking... or looking over the edge of the Grand Canyon, straight down a thousand or two thousand feet. Stomach lurch, knees... legs turn to jello, nausea, perhaps breathing issues as I can forget to breath, and that spin! Around and round we go! Anyway... Her's is not as bad, but sustained. It might be an ear or medicine thing. I'll be checking on her until it gets better. Her doc checked her out thoroughly, no stroke or other of the worst possibles.
Today? While doing quite well, I have been pushing. I am quite surprised nothing broke. I am not going to continue the extreme treadmill. Putting clothes away at a leisurely pace, clearing the bedroom, and putting up the storage units from now through the weekend. Actually, if I catch myself pacing too fast, I will slow down. For now the goal is two hours on, two off, doing actual work no more than six hours a day.
Even that might be pushing it, because I am allowing regular daily duties on the side. feeding, watering, and care for self and the critters, dishes and laundry as things gather... before they get out of hand, and other such. We will see how all works. Definitely doing better, if pushing a bit too hard. I can sense trouble if I don't throttle back at least a little, maybe a lot. Heart feels like it is... cracking. The clothes in the dryer should be done, just needing a short spin.
Fatted tea? Shortly. Cold tea and medicine first. Blood sugar is 284. High, but lower than any read since the 13th. I'll... keep that going. Chia and fatted tea. While early as per sleep cycle, my sleep cycle is off. So... I don't mind eating "early". Yea, sleep oddities make the world messy. Later.
Bedtime, finally!
.
.
Several small extras, one more as I go to bed, and laundry put in the dryer. Not as much as hoped, if i am probably planning too much on top of too much, over and over. I need slower days for a few days. I have a serious lower back pain, a sour stomach from too much to drink... non-alcoholic mind you... hmm perhaps a vinegar ketonic will fix that... as well as several other problems else happening.
No worries. And I will sleep until I wake, comfortably. As much as that may be possible. I should take my night meds, as days and nights are inverting. It's the only way to not begin losing doses, while not struggling through sleep with fresh water pills disturbing rest. It's just a short down and dirty trick, but it works.
Rough, but just as the edge of a good whisky. I earned it, I'll take it. Good night.
.
Several small extras, one more as I go to bed, and laundry put in the dryer. Not as much as hoped, if i am probably planning too much on top of too much, over and over. I need slower days for a few days. I have a serious lower back pain, a sour stomach from too much to drink... non-alcoholic mind you... hmm perhaps a vinegar ketonic will fix that... as well as several other problems else happening.
No worries. And I will sleep until I wake, comfortably. As much as that may be possible. I should take my night meds, as days and nights are inverting. It's the only way to not begin losing doses, while not struggling through sleep with fresh water pills disturbing rest. It's just a short down and dirty trick, but it works.
Rough, but just as the edge of a good whisky. I earned it, I'll take it. Good night.
Not as much as hoped.
.
.
Between slowing down and that odd insomniac fog of war, plus dinner? I just couldn't get started, then couldn't work hard or fast. I did get through several baskets of clothes put away, and will get empty boxes and packaging out. I couldn't make it through to the bed change. I'll get there soon.
There is no way I can get to swimming today, but that is closing in. All swim wear has been rounded up, and put in a bin with what else is swimming related, but won't be going every time. Hmm, there are a few more items to go in there yet tonight. If I kit out, I buy extras. It just saves heartache.
I will put a load to wash. Just trying to keep up. I have dishes soaking in the sink. I can do those while waiting to cycle the laundry. Yeah, I am working on keeping up. Might as well hit the cat litter, and should feed my ladies while at it. Don't I have towels to take back while I go that way. I am sure of it. See how things add up?
Blood sugar is 232 after dinner. I can handle an 18 point spike, if I'd be happier with a drop. I had more beef than planned. Still, good enough and well below the 330s. Oh, through the magic of the Internet, everything except flipping laundry is completed. Nothing extra, but I didn't promise anything extra.
Yeah, on to the few things remaining while closing up shop. Lungs are a bit tired... wet, full. Perhaps I am pushing a bit hard? The extra water pill should be helping. Ugh. I won't take more, more. I'm stretching things as is. I may need to slow down for the last of the week. Not stop, just slow up a bit. Good night.
.
Between slowing down and that odd insomniac fog of war, plus dinner? I just couldn't get started, then couldn't work hard or fast. I did get through several baskets of clothes put away, and will get empty boxes and packaging out. I couldn't make it through to the bed change. I'll get there soon.
There is no way I can get to swimming today, but that is closing in. All swim wear has been rounded up, and put in a bin with what else is swimming related, but won't be going every time. Hmm, there are a few more items to go in there yet tonight. If I kit out, I buy extras. It just saves heartache.
I will put a load to wash. Just trying to keep up. I have dishes soaking in the sink. I can do those while waiting to cycle the laundry. Yeah, I am working on keeping up. Might as well hit the cat litter, and should feed my ladies while at it. Don't I have towels to take back while I go that way. I am sure of it. See how things add up?
Blood sugar is 232 after dinner. I can handle an 18 point spike, if I'd be happier with a drop. I had more beef than planned. Still, good enough and well below the 330s. Oh, through the magic of the Internet, everything except flipping laundry is completed. Nothing extra, but I didn't promise anything extra.
Yeah, on to the few things remaining while closing up shop. Lungs are a bit tired... wet, full. Perhaps I am pushing a bit hard? The extra water pill should be helping. Ugh. I won't take more, more. I'm stretching things as is. I may need to slow down for the last of the week. Not stop, just slow up a bit. Good night.
Yes, work as well as... thought?
.
.
I can't call it thought, or not mine. I merely noticed what someone... someones... were reviewing. Oh, I suppose I thought about such, and responses. Clarifying.
First, fatted broth. Blood sugar is staying high, even back on keto. Fasting this weekend, sometimes it is the only way. Hmm, just checked. It broke below 332, in that range for the last week, to 214. Yeah. Okay. Anyway. I still need food. Roast beef reheated soon. Hungry, but will go shorter on beef, longer on fatted tea. Watching the artificial sweetener levels and hitting fats is what is working.
After the liquid lunch, I hit some work. First, the spare bedroom. Why? No clue. Sorting boxes, recharging batteries, stacking sorted boxes. Okay. On the good side, I finally found my first mp3 player. It is charging as I speak. I hope it still works. If not, I did order another, if the new one needs charged and loaded. Ugh. Quite a nice job though.
Then I showered and shaved. I also washed another pair of swimming shoes, then sprayed them with disinfectant. Doing that regularly, with all my shoes and boots, has cleared that locker-room smell I had once thought was just a permanent guy thing. Well, that, treating my feet with antibacterial and antifungal until I wasn't too ashamed to get them professionally groomed, then a year, almost two, of that. I also rasped the heels again. Crazy, but my feet are almost baby butt smooth. I'll keep on top of it, but that is taking less and less. More pedicures? Yes, the human contact and circulation help, for now, is quite worth the price.
I am hungry. Food next. Then I hope to dig into the bedroom, my main bedroom. I would like to put away or hang up every last stitch of cloth devised items that are clean, strip and remake the bed, then get the empty boxes and trash out. It's just packing and packaging, so no real fuss. I don't eat in there, etc. Finally, if I can do it. Or nearly? No, I will dig in. How far I get can't be yet known. Hungry. Later, unless I crash. Very pleased with all.
.
I can't call it thought, or not mine. I merely noticed what someone... someones... were reviewing. Oh, I suppose I thought about such, and responses. Clarifying.
First, fatted broth. Blood sugar is staying high, even back on keto. Fasting this weekend, sometimes it is the only way. Hmm, just checked. It broke below 332, in that range for the last week, to 214. Yeah. Okay. Anyway. I still need food. Roast beef reheated soon. Hungry, but will go shorter on beef, longer on fatted tea. Watching the artificial sweetener levels and hitting fats is what is working.
After the liquid lunch, I hit some work. First, the spare bedroom. Why? No clue. Sorting boxes, recharging batteries, stacking sorted boxes. Okay. On the good side, I finally found my first mp3 player. It is charging as I speak. I hope it still works. If not, I did order another, if the new one needs charged and loaded. Ugh. Quite a nice job though.
Then I showered and shaved. I also washed another pair of swimming shoes, then sprayed them with disinfectant. Doing that regularly, with all my shoes and boots, has cleared that locker-room smell I had once thought was just a permanent guy thing. Well, that, treating my feet with antibacterial and antifungal until I wasn't too ashamed to get them professionally groomed, then a year, almost two, of that. I also rasped the heels again. Crazy, but my feet are almost baby butt smooth. I'll keep on top of it, but that is taking less and less. More pedicures? Yes, the human contact and circulation help, for now, is quite worth the price.
I am hungry. Food next. Then I hope to dig into the bedroom, my main bedroom. I would like to put away or hang up every last stitch of cloth devised items that are clean, strip and remake the bed, then get the empty boxes and trash out. It's just packing and packaging, so no real fuss. I don't eat in there, etc. Finally, if I can do it. Or nearly? No, I will dig in. How far I get can't be yet known. Hungry. Later, unless I crash. Very pleased with all.
Tuesday, March 19, 2019
To it a bit early.
.
.
It all started by accident. I was fussing with something in the tub? No, I was grabbing a towel. I am washing towels after two uses. I'm pretty clean and it saves on everything. I tried more, but am not satisfied. More than two, sometimes as many as three but not always, and I have to use vinegar with soap, or it smells musty.
Anyway, as I pulled the towel, I pulled my liquid soap sprayer, which fell. It landed bottom first, but either the solid hydraulics of the impact, or simple mechanical forces of said, or tipping as it landed, shattered one side pressure containing the spray trigger. Cool. Bullshit actually, but cool as I knew I had another. Definitely bullshit. Anyway.
I knew where it was if, too, I didn't. In the shelving above the towel drawers, I was all but sure. So I opened the cupboards and... shit... what a mess. Not dirty, just... tangled... a jungle in there. So... I tried a few pokes, but realized that was just not going to be efficient enough. It all had to be organized.
Four levels of shelving, each with up to three levels, five?, deep, and probably twelve across, per shelf? Gah! Still, I hit it. It... actually wasn't that bad. Some of it was trash, old products no longer used, empty boxes, etc. No messes, thankfully, though I had resigned myself to clean if required.
Dig, sort by keeper products and size. Cleaning kit near cleaning stuff, application by application, soap by shampoo by conditioner, etc. Ah, the extra spray bottle? I had almost forgotten, given up. It was finally found. Not only in the last place I looked, but also the last place left to look... behind the last bucket on the right side of the top left shelf. Ugh. It had water, from when I tried it on the cats... worked, per cats, but was adding a musty note to the cave.
With that much done, I decided to hit the floor in there. Sweeping first, then mopping. I only have the sink remaining, and it isn't to bad. Though I will clean the toilet lid again, again, after I shower, then scrub under were it was again, again. Still, mostly done. Nice.
Then the ducks and girls were fed and watered. Forgot litter, will hit that after this post. I hit it twice yesterday, so it won't be too bad, if the overnighters are the worst.
I went to work an hour early, so a timered break after. An hour and an half. Then I will shower, shave, prepare a fatted bone broth while heating roast beef and... something else. As the beef heats, I will begin sorting clothes and the bedroom. Yea, yea, I am feeling it, in the non-feelings way. It doesn't matter that I don't feel I am up to it, only that I do it when I can.
.
It all started by accident. I was fussing with something in the tub? No, I was grabbing a towel. I am washing towels after two uses. I'm pretty clean and it saves on everything. I tried more, but am not satisfied. More than two, sometimes as many as three but not always, and I have to use vinegar with soap, or it smells musty.
Anyway, as I pulled the towel, I pulled my liquid soap sprayer, which fell. It landed bottom first, but either the solid hydraulics of the impact, or simple mechanical forces of said, or tipping as it landed, shattered one side pressure containing the spray trigger. Cool. Bullshit actually, but cool as I knew I had another. Definitely bullshit. Anyway.
I knew where it was if, too, I didn't. In the shelving above the towel drawers, I was all but sure. So I opened the cupboards and... shit... what a mess. Not dirty, just... tangled... a jungle in there. So... I tried a few pokes, but realized that was just not going to be efficient enough. It all had to be organized.
Four levels of shelving, each with up to three levels, five?, deep, and probably twelve across, per shelf? Gah! Still, I hit it. It... actually wasn't that bad. Some of it was trash, old products no longer used, empty boxes, etc. No messes, thankfully, though I had resigned myself to clean if required.
Dig, sort by keeper products and size. Cleaning kit near cleaning stuff, application by application, soap by shampoo by conditioner, etc. Ah, the extra spray bottle? I had almost forgotten, given up. It was finally found. Not only in the last place I looked, but also the last place left to look... behind the last bucket on the right side of the top left shelf. Ugh. It had water, from when I tried it on the cats... worked, per cats, but was adding a musty note to the cave.
With that much done, I decided to hit the floor in there. Sweeping first, then mopping. I only have the sink remaining, and it isn't to bad. Though I will clean the toilet lid again, again, after I shower, then scrub under were it was again, again. Still, mostly done. Nice.
Then the ducks and girls were fed and watered. Forgot litter, will hit that after this post. I hit it twice yesterday, so it won't be too bad, if the overnighters are the worst.
I went to work an hour early, so a timered break after. An hour and an half. Then I will shower, shave, prepare a fatted bone broth while heating roast beef and... something else. As the beef heats, I will begin sorting clothes and the bedroom. Yea, yea, I am feeling it, in the non-feelings way. It doesn't matter that I don't feel I am up to it, only that I do it when I can.
Up, late.
.
.
To bed about 2:00, or as much as a quarter after. Insomnia was just about to set in. The fog of deathly waking sleep was closing in. I escaped it, just. I must have fallen hard. The next thing I remember was looking at the clock, at 11: 38 or 48. Too early regardless of the objective time.
Sam has been a little terror through the night and morning. I try to let her out, as it seems a tom is what she wants or needs. Still too cold for her to be out long, low 40's, often, in the days. She is chasing around, jumping on me, knocking over trash bins and attacking the bags... which are thankfully mostly empty. Ugh. Heat, in any female, is annoying. *grin*
Back to it today? Slightly sore. Still tired. I don't know, but definitely if I can. I'll turn up the heat, take medicine, grab some aspirin, wake for a bit, then shower and shave in a couple hours? That is how it is set. First meds, then altering the furnace, then my morning *cough* reading session, then I'll set the alarm for two hours... for waking. Then I will know. Ugh. Later.
.
To bed about 2:00, or as much as a quarter after. Insomnia was just about to set in. The fog of deathly waking sleep was closing in. I escaped it, just. I must have fallen hard. The next thing I remember was looking at the clock, at 11: 38 or 48. Too early regardless of the objective time.
Sam has been a little terror through the night and morning. I try to let her out, as it seems a tom is what she wants or needs. Still too cold for her to be out long, low 40's, often, in the days. She is chasing around, jumping on me, knocking over trash bins and attacking the bags... which are thankfully mostly empty. Ugh. Heat, in any female, is annoying. *grin*
Back to it today? Slightly sore. Still tired. I don't know, but definitely if I can. I'll turn up the heat, take medicine, grab some aspirin, wake for a bit, then shower and shave in a couple hours? That is how it is set. First meds, then altering the furnace, then my morning *cough* reading session, then I'll set the alarm for two hours... for waking. Then I will know. Ugh. Later.
Dinner, that was about it.
.
.
A chuck roast and chicken drumsticks, well spiced and tended carefully. Not just good, amazing. I don't know why food goes from terrible to almost magic. Same point of purchase, same recipe, same measure of doneness. Sometimes I can barely eat food, especially chicken. This time it was not only good fresh, but a few pieces were seriously good cold. The beef was excellent warm, and I am betting warmed as well.
I heated the cave. I ate enough. Medicine was used. I dressed warmly enough. It didn't matter, I was simply too tired. I am awake this late in the hopes something would happen. I did bring barrels back. I am doing better about such things. Not perfect, better.
No shower or shave. Tomorrow. Brushing teeth four times and still a lot of bathroom runs, if only three sit sort today. Still a lot. One is okay, two is better, three isn't bad if hedging toward annoying. I still feel a bet wet in the lungs. I have cut from two to one extra water pill. A few more days, I am hoping, and all will be clear.
I'll keep with today's list tomorrow. Taking things slowly, in hopes of having energy for swimming Wednesday. I have just worn myself down, stretching direct energy spent and stretched my waking hours. I... am pushing a bit too hard. Well, and starting medicine on top of that. Ugh.
Good night.
.
A chuck roast and chicken drumsticks, well spiced and tended carefully. Not just good, amazing. I don't know why food goes from terrible to almost magic. Same point of purchase, same recipe, same measure of doneness. Sometimes I can barely eat food, especially chicken. This time it was not only good fresh, but a few pieces were seriously good cold. The beef was excellent warm, and I am betting warmed as well.
I heated the cave. I ate enough. Medicine was used. I dressed warmly enough. It didn't matter, I was simply too tired. I am awake this late in the hopes something would happen. I did bring barrels back. I am doing better about such things. Not perfect, better.
No shower or shave. Tomorrow. Brushing teeth four times and still a lot of bathroom runs, if only three sit sort today. Still a lot. One is okay, two is better, three isn't bad if hedging toward annoying. I still feel a bet wet in the lungs. I have cut from two to one extra water pill. A few more days, I am hoping, and all will be clear.
I'll keep with today's list tomorrow. Taking things slowly, in hopes of having energy for swimming Wednesday. I have just worn myself down, stretching direct energy spent and stretched my waking hours. I... am pushing a bit too hard. Well, and starting medicine on top of that. Ugh.
Good night.
Monday, March 18, 2019
Very late to bed.
.
.
It was after 4:00. A bit or hours I can't tell. Memory went blank, mostly... I just remember seeing 4:xx, but not going to bed even quite then. I woke at 13:00. I was expecting to be in pain. As I was waking there was mild pain. But by the time I actually woke, aches had mostly backed down, and here an hour later it is pretty much all gone.
Teeth brushed, ducks fed and watered, tea going down and fresh brewing, while thinking about breakfast. I won't be eating for a while. I just... food is on my mind. Not hungry, just... my mind likes food! No swimming today though. I was up too late. So I need to get a shower and shave. Wednesday? Yeah.
Back to work. With laundry and dishes done, and all laundry folded, I really am down to putting laundry away and sorting various rooms. I did clean the toilet, if I do need to sweep and mop, and hit the sink. I am hoping to really hit two rooms and the bathroom. Plus, later, roasting beef and maybe something else.
Not perfect, but I did get some things done, I am moving ahead fairly well, and I am feeling better. Besides work, I need to get my mp3 running, thus my computer has to be set up. Hmm. Yeah. I'll get there. I am solidly getting there, if not as fast as I would like, it is at a more reasonable pace. To fast and I am more likely to crash... remember the story of the tortoise and the hare? There you go. I have the choice, but the rabbit mode always loses. A shower and shave after I fully wake, a break, then into the laundry going up while hitting the bedroom.
Oh, the specters have changed once again. They are the size of adolescent cats, and are popping right at my feet. They, or it, appears just long enough to spook, and as I begin trying to visually... comprehend, it disappears. Left and right side, usually on the floor, within a foot, fairly frequent, sometimes up on a chair near me. Further, both Sam and Sassy have been startled. So it isn't just me. They don't seem to fear, as with me it's the sudden appearance that gets them. They must have figured something out though, because now they ignore the arrivals.
Dreams, last night. I... may, or maybe not, cover it, them? in a bit. Later.
.
It was after 4:00. A bit or hours I can't tell. Memory went blank, mostly... I just remember seeing 4:xx, but not going to bed even quite then. I woke at 13:00. I was expecting to be in pain. As I was waking there was mild pain. But by the time I actually woke, aches had mostly backed down, and here an hour later it is pretty much all gone.
Teeth brushed, ducks fed and watered, tea going down and fresh brewing, while thinking about breakfast. I won't be eating for a while. I just... food is on my mind. Not hungry, just... my mind likes food! No swimming today though. I was up too late. So I need to get a shower and shave. Wednesday? Yeah.
Back to work. With laundry and dishes done, and all laundry folded, I really am down to putting laundry away and sorting various rooms. I did clean the toilet, if I do need to sweep and mop, and hit the sink. I am hoping to really hit two rooms and the bathroom. Plus, later, roasting beef and maybe something else.
Not perfect, but I did get some things done, I am moving ahead fairly well, and I am feeling better. Besides work, I need to get my mp3 running, thus my computer has to be set up. Hmm. Yeah. I'll get there. I am solidly getting there, if not as fast as I would like, it is at a more reasonable pace. To fast and I am more likely to crash... remember the story of the tortoise and the hare? There you go. I have the choice, but the rabbit mode always loses. A shower and shave after I fully wake, a break, then into the laundry going up while hitting the bedroom.
Oh, the specters have changed once again. They are the size of adolescent cats, and are popping right at my feet. They, or it, appears just long enough to spook, and as I begin trying to visually... comprehend, it disappears. Left and right side, usually on the floor, within a foot, fairly frequent, sometimes up on a chair near me. Further, both Sam and Sassy have been startled. So it isn't just me. They don't seem to fear, as with me it's the sudden appearance that gets them. They must have figured something out though, because now they ignore the arrivals.
Dreams, last night. I... may, or maybe not, cover it, them? in a bit. Later.
Well, yes.
.
.
Trash, recycling, dishes from the tub put up, a bin rebagged, and two loads of dishes finished. One load was sort of hidden. I am up late, I believe, because I forgot medicine until very late. It just doesn't always allow me to sleep for a while. Fine, I got a few things done.
Oh, I loaded travel dispensers with soap, shampoo, and conditioner, bagged those, then double and triple bagged the lot. I also started setting up my swim duffel. I have yet to try my new and old trunks. I do have them gathered, just... I ran out of energy. Tomorrow. Yes.
It's almost 2:00? No nap. I don't hurt? Bedtime. Good night.
.
Trash, recycling, dishes from the tub put up, a bin rebagged, and two loads of dishes finished. One load was sort of hidden. I am up late, I believe, because I forgot medicine until very late. It just doesn't always allow me to sleep for a while. Fine, I got a few things done.
Oh, I loaded travel dispensers with soap, shampoo, and conditioner, bagged those, then double and triple bagged the lot. I also started setting up my swim duffel. I have yet to try my new and old trunks. I do have them gathered, just... I ran out of energy. Tomorrow. Yes.
It's almost 2:00? No nap. I don't hurt? Bedtime. Good night.
Sunday, March 17, 2019
Supper, a ghost, and else.
.
.
The last of the carby food. Spaghetti and doctored meat sauce. Blood sugar is high, but will come down by Wednesday to Friday. Another fatted tea. Might have another. I have eaten much less today, yet am stuffed. No nap either, or work. I will get trash and recycling out. Oh, I did set supper dishes to soak. Might even give them a first wash.
Not long ago, I suggested I never saw ghosts. No matter how I phrased it, I was mistaken. I have seen them before, and since. I might prefer to forget? This last one was between when I suggested such and now... a week ago, four days hence? In there like that.
She was a small woman. I sensed she lived here once, before the front and back additions were added. I saw her in the kitchen, going into the back hall. She didn't see me. I was in the short hall, to the bathroom... getting cat food. I almost asked her who she was until I realized what she was. A daughter, or wife, of a previous owner.
I... opened up, to... understand, or try, what she was about. She was a bit confused, as a lessor sensation. She thought she was still alive, believed she was home, but didn't understand the very existence of the kitchen. Okay, I got that. Her main problem was jealousy. She believed a woman would be arriving, to become the woman of the house. She thought she was or would... should... be the woman of the house.
.
The last of the carby food. Spaghetti and doctored meat sauce. Blood sugar is high, but will come down by Wednesday to Friday. Another fatted tea. Might have another. I have eaten much less today, yet am stuffed. No nap either, or work. I will get trash and recycling out. Oh, I did set supper dishes to soak. Might even give them a first wash.
Not long ago, I suggested I never saw ghosts. No matter how I phrased it, I was mistaken. I have seen them before, and since. I might prefer to forget? This last one was between when I suggested such and now... a week ago, four days hence? In there like that.
She was a small woman. I sensed she lived here once, before the front and back additions were added. I saw her in the kitchen, going into the back hall. She didn't see me. I was in the short hall, to the bathroom... getting cat food. I almost asked her who she was until I realized what she was. A daughter, or wife, of a previous owner.
I... opened up, to... understand, or try, what she was about. She was a bit confused, as a lessor sensation. She thought she was still alive, believed she was home, but didn't understand the very existence of the kitchen. Okay, I got that. Her main problem was jealousy. She believed a woman would be arriving, to become the woman of the house. She thought she was or would... should... be the woman of the house.
My bad.
.
.
I forgot to turn the heat up. If that wasn't all of it. The diuretics were releasing fluid, but seem to be releasing more. While I have only lost, probably, nearing thirty pounds, it looks like I lost more. My torso was backed up. Today I have consumed one small meal, the last few days I have eaten, to be honest, light. And, yet, I have gone about six times, plus the standing job about a dozen times in the day, four more through the night, and for the last two days solids, the last four liquids.
It isn't liquid, so not sickness. Some of it may be getting back to keto. High fat, high fiber, on top of more fluid and added diuretics. My eldest cat, Sam, has taken over one of the towel drawers. Usually sleeps soundly, ignoring me. The last few days, when I go in and sit, she finds somewhere else to be. I don't think it's all that bad. But she has never done that before. ;p
I think those things, plus not turning the furnace up, have broken my effort so far. I just raised the temp, am having another fatted tea, and will make the last batch of spaghetti shortly. Then, hopefully, some work or sleep. I could probably put up dishes before sleep, if it is headed that way.
Later.
.
I forgot to turn the heat up. If that wasn't all of it. The diuretics were releasing fluid, but seem to be releasing more. While I have only lost, probably, nearing thirty pounds, it looks like I lost more. My torso was backed up. Today I have consumed one small meal, the last few days I have eaten, to be honest, light. And, yet, I have gone about six times, plus the standing job about a dozen times in the day, four more through the night, and for the last two days solids, the last four liquids.
It isn't liquid, so not sickness. Some of it may be getting back to keto. High fat, high fiber, on top of more fluid and added diuretics. My eldest cat, Sam, has taken over one of the towel drawers. Usually sleeps soundly, ignoring me. The last few days, when I go in and sit, she finds somewhere else to be. I don't think it's all that bad. But she has never done that before. ;p
I think those things, plus not turning the furnace up, have broken my effort so far. I just raised the temp, am having another fatted tea, and will make the last batch of spaghetti shortly. Then, hopefully, some work or sleep. I could probably put up dishes before sleep, if it is headed that way.
Later.
Noon.
.
.
Ducks were fed, Sam allowed out. Now to actually wake. I feel, mostly, pretty good. A bit tired, some aches and pains, but better than most mornings for weeks now? I think so. Life is improving. I am still limited in how much work I can do, and when, but even that is an improvement, and improving.
Dishes from last night will be hit before long. One of the pots will be used for breakfast. A roast for supper, and a couple of fatted teas and chia and flax cereal to fill out a sort of lunch/snack... those latter being how I get the fat portions configured. Until steak is fiscally viable as a near daily driver again, fats have to be consumed this way.
The goal is all washed clothes and dishes put up, the bedroom sorted, and boxes to be broken down at least gathered. If that gets done, then the bathroom. Even more? Then the boxes taken down and some sorting in the living room. I doubt if I will make it out of the bedroom, but who knows. Seriously, sometimes I just get second, third, and fourth winds. I want direction, a plan, just in case. I have lost that drive to not having goals before, quite frustrating. I'll save putting up storage systems for tomorrow. Probably.
Oh, trash. I doubt if I have more than three smaller bags. Perhaps a bag or two outside already? Doubtful. I think it is recycling day? I think I do have two bags out there, maybe one to take out. Yeah, easy enough. A few garbage cans will need bags added. No real heavy work this time. Stay on top, easy to keep up.
Swimming tomorrow. I will shower at the pool, before and after, so no need shower at home. That isn't unfairly taking advantage, it is what most pools prefer. It cuts cleaning expenses much more than it costs. I am a bit nervous. It's been a while, new pools, and, well, people... mostly naked people. *grins* Later.
.
Ducks were fed, Sam allowed out. Now to actually wake. I feel, mostly, pretty good. A bit tired, some aches and pains, but better than most mornings for weeks now? I think so. Life is improving. I am still limited in how much work I can do, and when, but even that is an improvement, and improving.
Dishes from last night will be hit before long. One of the pots will be used for breakfast. A roast for supper, and a couple of fatted teas and chia and flax cereal to fill out a sort of lunch/snack... those latter being how I get the fat portions configured. Until steak is fiscally viable as a near daily driver again, fats have to be consumed this way.
The goal is all washed clothes and dishes put up, the bedroom sorted, and boxes to be broken down at least gathered. If that gets done, then the bathroom. Even more? Then the boxes taken down and some sorting in the living room. I doubt if I will make it out of the bedroom, but who knows. Seriously, sometimes I just get second, third, and fourth winds. I want direction, a plan, just in case. I have lost that drive to not having goals before, quite frustrating. I'll save putting up storage systems for tomorrow. Probably.
Oh, trash. I doubt if I have more than three smaller bags. Perhaps a bag or two outside already? Doubtful. I think it is recycling day? I think I do have two bags out there, maybe one to take out. Yeah, easy enough. A few garbage cans will need bags added. No real heavy work this time. Stay on top, easy to keep up.
Swimming tomorrow. I will shower at the pool, before and after, so no need shower at home. That isn't unfairly taking advantage, it is what most pools prefer. It cuts cleaning expenses much more than it costs. I am a bit nervous. It's been a while, new pools, and, well, people... mostly naked people. *grins* Later.
To bed it is.
.
.
The only thing I will do is set the dishes up, and put the last of the sauce away. Well, brushing teeth as well. Crashing hard. It's half of each thing hoped, earlier to bed if not the earliest, but with little done. Good night.
.
The only thing I will do is set the dishes up, and put the last of the sauce away. Well, brushing teeth as well. Crashing hard. It's half of each thing hoped, earlier to bed if not the earliest, but with little done. Good night.
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