Oh, just... thinking out loud.

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May have to ask someone what they think.  Yeah.

One of the worst nights I can remember.

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The blankets were set up well.  Didn't matter.  I began freezing.  I made sure they were set up correctly, again, later on.  And they were.  So I turned the electric blanket on.  Which helped, until it hurt.  It became too hot.  I would put my feet out for a bit, then freeze, pull them in, then bake.  I simply could not get it right.

More, swelling.  Feet, ankle, knee... all swelling to the point of pain, on top of being too hot or too cold.  No idea why.  The window was closed.  But it is getting warmer up there, into the low to mid 60s.  It has been in the low 50s until spring has begun it's thing.  Though, too, it's the body trying to heal.  And pulling, pooling, pushing blood around to do things.

Doing this and that.

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While mostly just gaming, while gaming I am doing more.  I am working the ankle, and knee.  Not... greatly?  But, from time to time, giving each a bit of some turning, lifting, stretching, and light twisting.  Flexing my foot, wiggling the toes, just... trying to give everything that hurts a bit of a push, pulls, and all.

I'm not doing it to severe pain, but I am pushing past the pain to some degree.  As well, I am leaning into the bruised hip.  Not... so much as to cause agony, but enough to stretch into pain a goodly bit.

Well?

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After more time on the phone than you might imagine, I... found some things out.  I got next appointment date, time, place, Dr.'s name, and contact info.  Then, the appointment following that.  But... had to call three different numbers to find things out about that.  Further, I changed the place, which required a change of date and time.  But... okay.

As to the last appointment, that I knew about?  It's on no record with anyone I called.  And anyone I might have had access, or any connections anyone knows about.  So... there is one appointment that has simply gone missing.

Nausea.

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Back.  Not from food, or such, this time.  Just from the various pains.  It's all adding up to create nausea.  Well, and dizziness, along with a few other things.  All I can do is suffer through it, for now.

I keep receiving calls, for more appointments.  It difficult to stay on top of these things.  One of the things I will need to call back about.  I have the time, and date, and address or roughly.  But I don't know what clinic, the name of the center, and it isn't one I would know.  I also don't have their phone number.  Radiology?  By why several towns over?

I have to admit, life is hurting.

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It's more than everything hurts, than that something hurts.  Both legs, the right ankle, hip, and knee, ribs, and other things.  Amost a suffocating sort of hurting.  Breathing is difficult, from the pains.  Headache, and the neck is finally starting to hurt.  That begin yesterday afternoon.  Plus a bit of a headache, from or with that?

Nothing is excessive, on it's own?  It's just a lot of pains.  Well, as long as I don't bump my hip, or stand wrong, or sit too fast.  Still, it's everything in combination that is really getting to me.

An hour earlier.

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Or so.  When recoverying, I simply need more sleep.  The first couple of days I slept even more.  Twelve hours last night.  Again, I did set the alarms.  Hoping to wake at four.  Actually, hoping to wake at two or three.  Couldn't do it this morning.  And knew that wrestling with the snooze bar would only frustrate me.  So, when it went off, I turned it off immediately.

However, I woke a bit before six, turned on the light, sat up, and shut the alarm down before it sounded.  It took me nearly the ten minutes before to finally get socks on, and get up.  Wearing pj's to bed, and had been wearing socks, but it got too warm.

Still awake.

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Very tired.  Rather stiff and sore.  Ribs aren't too bad today, for now.  I had to get out for a bit, and did.  But... the body is about to get worse.  And it feels so socld.  It was at least 46 out there.  But it's feels so much colder than that.

Night medicine, down.  As well, some painkillers.

Well, a start.

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A message to my primary.  A request from the attending physician.  Then a call to podiatry.  I was looking at the wrong paperwork.  The right paperwork did have a number to call, but just for podiatry, not for... the other.  But, that may have been a misunderstanding.  That may be a referal from that referal, if he feels the need.  Can't reember what it is called.

Still, I have called the two numbers I have.  Oh, and the appointment from wound treatment, for that first wound is setup.

Hurt?

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The knee, ankle, and hip... in that order?  Only when I stand or sit.  No "attempt".  If I mean to do it, I do it.  Though... I may not get up whilly-nilly, as I might have.  Still, It, mostly, only hurts when I do get up, or for a shot while after getting settled.  It is still true, truer than I thought it was going to be, after first thinking it was.  My ribs hurt more, from losing so much weight so fast, yet not quite being skinny yet.  That 'tweener stage is brutal.

Now, waking, getting off the mattresses, crawling over to a bench with which to help me life up off the ground, since one knee and angle is bum, and one side can't be flexed without absolute misery?  That... hurts.  And, yet, I am guessing that is probably as good as physical therapy as I can get?  Or... won't hurt in that deepartment.  Wait, it will hurt.  But that department... does hurt.

Yea?

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Look, I was graced with suffering, and pain.  And... I took it like any red-blooded American man, from my time, should.  Regardless of my... many troubles aside.  Pain, and being useless in the world, is... difficult.  I tried just about everything, save a great height.  Since nothing else worked, I feared becoming a broken... thing... or more broken.

You know it's a bruise?

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When they send you to physical therapy just for that.  The clot, in the middle?  I think it was 8 something cm?  The whole thing?  Much bigger.

No broken bones.  But they aren't sure about other things.  So the foot doctor, for something he will treat.  Or... maybe.

I... know it was her.

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Oh, yes.  I... know.

She tells me.  She... didn't want me to say it.

Not bad.

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From the bumps and such yesterday, not too bad today.  No extra pain, save two things.  The leg and knee are stiffer.  No serious swelling as I had feared.  But it's... limpy time.  However, the minor abrasion the on the side, that hadn't gone into the skin?  Well?  That side has a swollen mass the size of a softball, under the skin.  Burns.  Probably as much from the swelling as else.

I may call the VA, about an ER visit today.  We'll see.  Later.  I've never seen a swell like that, in all my accidents, incidents, and such.  As well, I'm slightly worried about my knee and ankle.  Sprain, break, twist... something.  Ugh.  Could have been worse.  Haven't looked at my face, yet, today.  Yet.  Ugly, nothing to look at.  So... but do want to see if any swelling is there.  Or... more swelling.  Bleh.

Well... for now, just some waking up.  Later.

Oh, ouch.

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Just did a do dinger.  Skinned my knee in two spots, left a goose egg under the bigger of the two dings.  As well, scraped my wrist in a couple of places, like as if skidded, and caught one patch, then a smaller patch.  Twisted my ankle something fierce, and fell on my side hard.  Could have been worse, much worse.  But... I'll survive.

My ribs still hurt more than any of all that.  And I don't think that hurt my ribs more.  We'll see tomorrow.  It really might bite me then.  Oh, and broke my glasses.  They weren't my best glasses, but my second best.  Not happy.  And... I may try to fix them.  Oh well.

I really didn't want to...

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No, the dishes I wanted to empty and remove.  To take a shower.  Which, I also wanted to do.  It's the scale.  I didn't want to step on it.  Last time I stepped on it, say... four days ago?  Did I list it?  I weighed 238.6.  Up from my low of 235.x... some week or two before.

I plateaued, and worse, had started gaining.  Nothing felt different.  Sure, I was getting rid of fluid.  But, by physical indications, I am only half way through that process.  I... really wanted to wait, a few days, get more water out.  But... no... I was naked, to shower, decided to just eat the bullet.

A bit of a fuss.

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I was a bit grumpy, and angry about having to provide so much information... when it was they who called me.  But giving out that much information is not wise, either, anyway.  But, sore, tired, unhappy with that, I got angry.  A few days ago.

They called my primary, and asked to cancel me.  So, my primary contacted me.  I explained my fuss.  They gave me a number to call, so I called.  But they were busy, and busy, and busy, so I never got through.  It was lunch, that happens.  I got a call back today.  Saying they had tried to call me.  But... they hadn't.  I've been awake, my phone is open, and I have recieved no calls.  But I did say I would call again, and did.

Awake, late?

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Yes, both to recent norms, and by when I went to bed.  Must have needed the sleep.  Down at 17:30, hard.  The last bit of gaming totaled me.  Waking and getting up at 3:30.  In better shape?  Well, for now.  But I feel the ribs beginning to whine.  Now, it does look like, between compression hose and water pills, water is... if not leaving the body yet, is vacating the feet.  Not all gone, yet.  But... going.  Another day or two, I am hoping it will be in better trim.  Using old, larger, socks.  Will use newer, smaller, socks when I... can fit them.

Blood sugar is 101 fasting.  Weekly, biweekly, and monthly averages are 106, 124, and 139.   That last?  Is about the A1C from my last visit ~6.5.  Today's reading is around an A1C of 5.1...  Getting there.  I think I have enough blood sugar test strips to last to the end of the month.  Then I'll have to buy more myself.  At least for a while.  I want to monitor it, stay on track.  Especially when trying to add a few foods back.

I finished the game.

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Not... that I am done with the game.  And... I didn't beat the game.  Solo?  I doubt it is possible.  Personally?  I just don't think so.  If it weren't for blind coop, having people basically carry me through?  There is no way I would have done it.  Just forcing coop.

Still, the first playthrough is... about... learning parts of the game, finding and sorting gear, and... such.  Even on the easiest mode, it is basically too difficult for most players.  It just is.  I'm a decent player.  But... am aging, and am not... the best, never was.  Just... reasonable player, good enough for this level.  Or... was.

A nice day.

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I had decided, even if it got to 50, I wouldn't open up today.  Just... feeling cold.  The trash truck went buy, emptied my barrel.  An UPS truck delivered something.  So, eventually, I got out, got the package, then brought the barrel back in.  Then, while feeding Sassy a bit later, I checked the temp.  58!  I... can do that.  I opened up the back spaces, just the windows.

Forgot to turn the furnace off, but got to that a half hour after.  Close enough.  I need to get the windows upstairs open.  Just... the ribs hurt so terribly.  But... just... I'll get to it.

Very strange.

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Did get the trash out, and something extra.  Sassy is being fed, her litter and water tended.  And, was redoing water.  I had one last jug.  It had been cleaned, then left to purify, in hot water.  Not boiled, but at 170, say, and contained, closed, for overnight, I count that as probably sanitized.

So, I finished that, but needed to run water.  I did that.  But, water was showing over 880 particles?  The usual high is 440 with it often running in the mid 200s.  Now, it could be the machine, but the water DID look different as I filled the reservoir.  Bubbly, extra white, strange.  Not sure if something, along the system, got flushed?  Or if there is some problem in the line, here or else?  Or... as I mentioned, perhaps it was just the machine (if the water does look... strange).

A good sleep.

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A fine awakening.  Down at 16:30, awake at midnight... well... five to.  I stayed down until 1:30, with some effort.  Finally had to wake, get up, get going.  I left the window open a solid crack, say a third, quarter, the way up.  It was 56, outside, when I went to bed.  But a cold 56?  Strange how 46 can seem warmer than some 56 F days, nights.

The air was good.  Fresh, nice.  Then I shut it about when I woke up.  Give or take fifteen minutes?  Memory, while sleeping, even right when waking, is... cloudy.  Still, got a better night sleep, with fresh air coming in.  And, strangely, it was warmer.  Usually it is 59, lately, up there.  With the window open?  64.  Though, maybe, even with the door shut, it pulls heat up and through?  Don't know.

Doing good.

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I feel like I have been run over by a semi.  But, blood sugar is... incredible.  It dropped from 122 fasting, to 95 just now.  And the weekly, biweekly, and monthly averages are 108, 128, and 140.  I was starting to think insulin was permanently out of control.

I had corrected it.  Twice before.  Then... just... blundered back into old eating, and drinking, habits.  I didn't think it would correct, this time.  Took a LOT more effort.  And, it wasn't just dissatisfaction with my food.  But real pain.  I'm still hurting.

Midnight thirty.

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Well, when I awoke.  Tried to stay it.  Only made it to one.  Fine.

Sassy was fed, first thing.  She didn't get much food yesterday?  I think she only got one can.  Usually I feed her two.  Oddly, she didn't fuss much.