.
.
I don't often say much this way, but I mean it. This group does it better anyway.
Well, I did (happen) to be up, and mostly on time to go help do some community work. Oh, sure, I did light stuff. Computer data processing, until I shut the machine to turn it on it's side to plug in an internet connection as the one I had been using died, and when I opened it up, the machine went to a fingerprint security. Now, that is no comparison to what they did at my home. From sticks on the roof and cleaning the spouts, to mowing and removing the leaves and twigs, leaving a wheelbarrow full. I returned while they were in the middle. I hated to not help but I honestly couldn't. Nothing like being a gimp, I suppose that is the way of sin though.
I want so much to take a nap. I truly am fried just from showering, dressing, and walking there, doing that bit, and walking back. Being around people, after being alone so often, is a bit taxing. That is part of my problem with Church. I try to escape, after events, but often can't. I'm not quite rude enough, and besides I do like people. What a mess. Too tired to stay awake and too sleepy to do anything, but there it is.
In any case, I am going to try to get to confession today. And perhaps Church after. I doubt if I will make it to Church tomorrow, but I will try if I can't quite make it tonight. Much like a power system, you try to have the led lights to see the manual so you can figure things out, then you realize you can't afford the led lights! *blink* Whoa! What happened. Never... mind. That is how my heart works, sometimes. This last month has been like that constantly. We will see what happens now, with a slight reduction. They might be right, it might not be the medicine. But if it isn't, what then? Don't give me that psychiatric mumbo-jumbo, that stuff is bogus and always has been. It is an excuse for lazy doctors. There might be something else, but either they don't know or they don't care, or both.
Anyway, I do everything I can do, when I can, how I can. I am quite sure God is happier with me (on this score) than I am. He knows all. And, yes, that brings some satisfaction. He knows some of us 'rats' are in a maze that has no solution. I am not sure if He prefers that we settle in and just accept or if He wants us to push on through? Maybe each has a place. I know I have to keep trying. I don't even honestly always even know why. It's ingrained to never ever even honestly think of giving up now. Must... move... forward... Alright, who turned off the lights? *bonk* Alright, who put the steel bar at head level in the doorway? Bleh.
Oh, I am about a quarter of the way through the book-thing I downloaded from you, D.C. I am just reading it, as much of it as I can before my 'batteries die'. I will go back through and figure out what some unknown terms and components and such mean or are. Then when I have a good handle on things, I will read it again. I will be looking specific things up, looking at pictures of the items, sorting things in my mind, and getting heavy on this. It's a start.
Good day.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Batteries might compete with solar panels for cost.
.
.
I can't quite tell what is what, exactly, yet. Panels are in these units, batteries in those, and other components offer yet their own units of capacity. Still, just from looking here and here, and guessing a bit, it looks like batteries could easily be similar in cost on up to several times the cost of solar panels. That might make them impossible to include in my system. Then again, it is all pie-in-the-sky at the moment. Only the possibility exists. I did see this battery, but it doesn't indicate if it is actually nickel iron, here is one that is "only" $1,000 per, here is $66,000 dollars, not including the ties. I actually about choked when I first saw the batteries that cost a thousand. Then I saw the ones that, well, were more. And somehow I felt better? Something like that.
Now, there are problems with nickel iron. They do last forever, but they also seem to have rather slow recharge and discharge rates. Now, what that really means in terms of a system is another matter. Longevity though? There are nickel iron batteries that have been in use for 68 years and going. They were invented by Edison, yes, that Edison, while he was trying to develop electric cars. Oh, you thought electric cars were a "new invention". Ah well. No, I knew about electric cars. I just didn't know about the particular batteries they tried, or had forgotten. Yes, I've read about such things. As a young one, I was all hopeful and cheery about the future sci-tech mags and books promised. Then becoming a history buff, I began looking at where these promises came from. Usually history held the beginnings of notions. Man has created very little save enacting what other men could only consider in their times. Even the first computer, a numerical device, was developed before technology could abide it, then the son of the man actually built one when technology advanced enough. But at such a cost as to be useless.
We are very little different from those days when I was but a boy. The incompetence is the same, only complexity has been elevated, so instead of living in a make-do world, we live in a disposable one. We, instead of rising to the pinnacle of reason have sunk to the edge of extinction. If nothing else, everything is kept up through the skin of our teeth and one or two major failings will bring the house of cards down upon our heads so fast we won't be able to recover. When cashiers can't count change, when mechanics can't fix or even diagnose because they are dependent upon electronic gadgets to understand other gadgets and confused by how that works, and when all manufacturing is based on computer systems, which if I had to say, are artificially kept running because the bugs in the systems are so many, vast, and unrelenting that nothing actually runs as it should nor would computers last a week without nearly constant fudging. What a future.
One way or another we will go back. How far back? It depends on how well we can use what we have remaining to us when all else fails to hold the barbarians in check. I would guess the best regression possible would be to the 1950's. The worst? The dark ages. Ah, but these things come and go. It is only a matter of time, assuming we survive in the first place, which means assuming no nukes, which means you best pray we figure out how to stop Iran. A nation whose president believes he needs to help the end times arrive. With or without him, we are going back. Even then survival is not assured.
Too many peoples are hooked-up, hooked-in, and jacked around. They have no means of survival when pushing paper or stamping plans will no longer bring food to their plate or provide a home in which to live. This will be harder still on women who won't be able to compete for the materials of life that requires hard work. Women will understand the world in which much of what they call chauvinism, if not created then instituted by a queen, was mandated. And they will understand why, and why they aren't equal. Still, as much of a grin as that and some other parts would bring to my face, I hope I am dead by then. There is a reason ancient civilizations were abandoned in days, moments even. The edge of extinction takes a great deal of idiocy to create, decades, centuries, millennia of hard work too, and just a few things to enact. *blink*
That, as I have heard said, "don't confront me none...". I am here, now, and will do what I can to ensure what I can. I am just converting from the cricket who croaked to the ant who survived, if at a turtles pace. Then again, I suppose the turtle did beat the rabbit. Such is the way of things. A bit more sleep, I think. That must have been one heck of a dream I just had. Never mind.
.
I can't quite tell what is what, exactly, yet. Panels are in these units, batteries in those, and other components offer yet their own units of capacity. Still, just from looking here and here, and guessing a bit, it looks like batteries could easily be similar in cost on up to several times the cost of solar panels. That might make them impossible to include in my system. Then again, it is all pie-in-the-sky at the moment. Only the possibility exists. I did see this battery, but it doesn't indicate if it is actually nickel iron, here is one that is "only" $1,000 per, here is $66,000 dollars, not including the ties. I actually about choked when I first saw the batteries that cost a thousand. Then I saw the ones that, well, were more. And somehow I felt better? Something like that.
Now, there are problems with nickel iron. They do last forever, but they also seem to have rather slow recharge and discharge rates. Now, what that really means in terms of a system is another matter. Longevity though? There are nickel iron batteries that have been in use for 68 years and going. They were invented by Edison, yes, that Edison, while he was trying to develop electric cars. Oh, you thought electric cars were a "new invention". Ah well. No, I knew about electric cars. I just didn't know about the particular batteries they tried, or had forgotten. Yes, I've read about such things. As a young one, I was all hopeful and cheery about the future sci-tech mags and books promised. Then becoming a history buff, I began looking at where these promises came from. Usually history held the beginnings of notions. Man has created very little save enacting what other men could only consider in their times. Even the first computer, a numerical device, was developed before technology could abide it, then the son of the man actually built one when technology advanced enough. But at such a cost as to be useless.
We are very little different from those days when I was but a boy. The incompetence is the same, only complexity has been elevated, so instead of living in a make-do world, we live in a disposable one. We, instead of rising to the pinnacle of reason have sunk to the edge of extinction. If nothing else, everything is kept up through the skin of our teeth and one or two major failings will bring the house of cards down upon our heads so fast we won't be able to recover. When cashiers can't count change, when mechanics can't fix or even diagnose because they are dependent upon electronic gadgets to understand other gadgets and confused by how that works, and when all manufacturing is based on computer systems, which if I had to say, are artificially kept running because the bugs in the systems are so many, vast, and unrelenting that nothing actually runs as it should nor would computers last a week without nearly constant fudging. What a future.
One way or another we will go back. How far back? It depends on how well we can use what we have remaining to us when all else fails to hold the barbarians in check. I would guess the best regression possible would be to the 1950's. The worst? The dark ages. Ah, but these things come and go. It is only a matter of time, assuming we survive in the first place, which means assuming no nukes, which means you best pray we figure out how to stop Iran. A nation whose president believes he needs to help the end times arrive. With or without him, we are going back. Even then survival is not assured.
Too many peoples are hooked-up, hooked-in, and jacked around. They have no means of survival when pushing paper or stamping plans will no longer bring food to their plate or provide a home in which to live. This will be harder still on women who won't be able to compete for the materials of life that requires hard work. Women will understand the world in which much of what they call chauvinism, if not created then instituted by a queen, was mandated. And they will understand why, and why they aren't equal. Still, as much of a grin as that and some other parts would bring to my face, I hope I am dead by then. There is a reason ancient civilizations were abandoned in days, moments even. The edge of extinction takes a great deal of idiocy to create, decades, centuries, millennia of hard work too, and just a few things to enact. *blink*
That, as I have heard said, "don't confront me none...". I am here, now, and will do what I can to ensure what I can. I am just converting from the cricket who croaked to the ant who survived, if at a turtles pace. Then again, I suppose the turtle did beat the rabbit. Such is the way of things. A bit more sleep, I think. That must have been one heck of a dream I just had. Never mind.
Friday, September 9, 2011
Definitely frustrating.
.
.
Even knowing my condition is a physical health issue doesn't change the fact that when failure occurs it is frustrating. Exhaustion and incapacity are plaguing me. Sure, a bit of this and that goes on, but nothing close to what I had hoped to do. And, here I sit. Actually, I am about ready for a nap. I don't really have a lot of choice in the matter, either. It's like using a flashlight. You might want it to shine, but as the batteries die you get less and less light until it just fails. My batteries are dying.
Oh, something I forgot to mention before. My weight has jumped. I went from 264 to 295 in about two to three months. I am not retaining water, and this last bit of the jump I haven't even been eating much. Who knows. I did stop functioning, maybe that was enough to pack on pounds somehow. I hadn't noticed it. I asked the missionaries if I look 30 pounds heavier, but they didn't think so. Ah well. Of course I have suggested I can gain and lose 30 to 50 pounds in a very short period of time. I guess this is just more proof.
Nap time. Later.
.
Even knowing my condition is a physical health issue doesn't change the fact that when failure occurs it is frustrating. Exhaustion and incapacity are plaguing me. Sure, a bit of this and that goes on, but nothing close to what I had hoped to do. And, here I sit. Actually, I am about ready for a nap. I don't really have a lot of choice in the matter, either. It's like using a flashlight. You might want it to shine, but as the batteries die you get less and less light until it just fails. My batteries are dying.
Oh, something I forgot to mention before. My weight has jumped. I went from 264 to 295 in about two to three months. I am not retaining water, and this last bit of the jump I haven't even been eating much. Who knows. I did stop functioning, maybe that was enough to pack on pounds somehow. I hadn't noticed it. I asked the missionaries if I look 30 pounds heavier, but they didn't think so. Ah well. Of course I have suggested I can gain and lose 30 to 50 pounds in a very short period of time. I guess this is just more proof.
Nap time. Later.
Today is a new day.
.
.
I will begin taking my medicine again, at the revised dosage(s), today. I will also try to begin digging in and cleaning my home. I did clean this room a good deal more, if it is still a bit rough. Mopping a few spots, putting a few boxes and the rocket stove away, and putting a pile of books in order on a shelf would finish the project. So that is my goal, along with doing the dishes and laundry, getting rid of the boxes that have recently collected along with the few that remain from my last war on boxes, and making sure to feed my face and keep enough fluids going so that I don't dehydrate again.
I have only about a week until my mother arrives. I can do bits and pieces, as and when I can. I have enough food to not have to cook until she arrives, so if I can finish washing dishes, all I will need to tend are serving dishes and bowls. It will still be rather messy, I simply can't do enough, right now, to flush out the finer details. Her bed will be made, she will have a nightstand and a lamp, and I will try to remember to use the deodorizing device she sent (another thing I can begin using up to her visit, a minor task, but I need to remember to turn it on for just a short time, then turn it off, bleh).
And, I know she will put me to work. But now that I realize I have an actual physical health issue, I know that pushing it is more than a bit unwise. I will help, but when my body says to stop, I have to stop now. It isn't a matter of will or want and I will truck no abuse. If she feels it is unfair, I will ask her to sit and we will play card games while she is here, and with no offense taken. I simply can't go her way. Now I realize what I used to do in trying was more than she should have expected. But, she didn't know. Know we do.
Cool! I mean, in the 50's at night and only into the 80's F during the day (and much cooler inside). Now, though, I can begin opening up my drapes. I just open up what doesn't allow direct sunlight in, as that would still be a bit much. But looking out into the world is a fine thing. To my south, fully visible during my morning and afternoon drape dressing, are the Wellsville Mountains. That range, and the hike it offers, is the peak of my hiking hopes. No mountaineering is required, mind you. There is a path, or many actually. The more common, or typical, or main full path, however you wish to term it, it about 9 to 11 miles, rises and falls 3k to 4k, mostly in sharp upticks followed by steep inclines, and maybe more than one (depending on which way you go?). All I know is it will test the mettle of any hiker, from anywhere in the world, and allows you to hike along the top ridge for some number of miles (or the whole of some of the paths). Further, I think trying to climb the steepest angles might actually be beyond mountaineering. From space, I have heard, looking down on it is like looking down on a knife with it's edge facing up at you. I might be wrong about the mountain climbing part, that is just speculation from lore and looks.
Oh, well, I ought to get that money into my account and get my oil changed too. It is way overdue. I haven't been able to find another place other than the place I have been going unfortunately, so that will have to do. I haven't searched in Ogden or SLC, if that would be inconvenient. Though I could fit it in with my hospital and clinic visits, perhaps. While in town I may stop at the local used goods place and look for a cookpot or two, to try the rocket stove.
Have a good day.
.
I will begin taking my medicine again, at the revised dosage(s), today. I will also try to begin digging in and cleaning my home. I did clean this room a good deal more, if it is still a bit rough. Mopping a few spots, putting a few boxes and the rocket stove away, and putting a pile of books in order on a shelf would finish the project. So that is my goal, along with doing the dishes and laundry, getting rid of the boxes that have recently collected along with the few that remain from my last war on boxes, and making sure to feed my face and keep enough fluids going so that I don't dehydrate again.
I have only about a week until my mother arrives. I can do bits and pieces, as and when I can. I have enough food to not have to cook until she arrives, so if I can finish washing dishes, all I will need to tend are serving dishes and bowls. It will still be rather messy, I simply can't do enough, right now, to flush out the finer details. Her bed will be made, she will have a nightstand and a lamp, and I will try to remember to use the deodorizing device she sent (another thing I can begin using up to her visit, a minor task, but I need to remember to turn it on for just a short time, then turn it off, bleh).
And, I know she will put me to work. But now that I realize I have an actual physical health issue, I know that pushing it is more than a bit unwise. I will help, but when my body says to stop, I have to stop now. It isn't a matter of will or want and I will truck no abuse. If she feels it is unfair, I will ask her to sit and we will play card games while she is here, and with no offense taken. I simply can't go her way. Now I realize what I used to do in trying was more than she should have expected. But, she didn't know. Know we do.
Cool! I mean, in the 50's at night and only into the 80's F during the day (and much cooler inside). Now, though, I can begin opening up my drapes. I just open up what doesn't allow direct sunlight in, as that would still be a bit much. But looking out into the world is a fine thing. To my south, fully visible during my morning and afternoon drape dressing, are the Wellsville Mountains. That range, and the hike it offers, is the peak of my hiking hopes. No mountaineering is required, mind you. There is a path, or many actually. The more common, or typical, or main full path, however you wish to term it, it about 9 to 11 miles, rises and falls 3k to 4k, mostly in sharp upticks followed by steep inclines, and maybe more than one (depending on which way you go?). All I know is it will test the mettle of any hiker, from anywhere in the world, and allows you to hike along the top ridge for some number of miles (or the whole of some of the paths). Further, I think trying to climb the steepest angles might actually be beyond mountaineering. From space, I have heard, looking down on it is like looking down on a knife with it's edge facing up at you. I might be wrong about the mountain climbing part, that is just speculation from lore and looks.
Oh, well, I ought to get that money into my account and get my oil changed too. It is way overdue. I haven't been able to find another place other than the place I have been going unfortunately, so that will have to do. I haven't searched in Ogden or SLC, if that would be inconvenient. Though I could fit it in with my hospital and clinic visits, perhaps. While in town I may stop at the local used goods place and look for a cookpot or two, to try the rocket stove.
Have a good day.
Some questions.
.
.
No, no, not a consideration. However, I have been wondering about something for some time. Polygamy has been of academic interest. No, it isn't a common practice where I live and the Mormon church has left it behind, not in legal part but in actual doctrine and dogma. So, that isn't what it causing the questions in my mind. The thing is, after being told all my life that this practice is incorrect, I have yet to find a religious reason for the ending of the practice. Christ was a Jew. And, at that time, I do believe that marrying the wife of a deceased brother required Polygamy, as most men were married already. Christ said nothing about this.
Nor can I find, in the Catholic Church, anything more than that the notion of marrying more than one woman was ever officially outlawed. It has simply become the practice. In minor research, so far, it seems that the early church only allowed one marriage, but did allow for having other women. Which, actually, seems worse than having two wives as there is little in the way of assurances to the other women. Perhaps the Church boxed itself in and sort of lost the fight on legalistic or moral grounds based on what I suggest. And, while finally giving over to the notion of a single wife and no other women, it didn't really follow through. But as laws became absolute and the state gained power, it took the notions from the Church and cemented them. In any case, I see no religious authority to bar multiple wives save a tradition that is no older, give or take, than the reformation. Oddly, the reformation accepted this unwarranted practice of monogamy.
Actually, other than social stigma potentially, and economic concerns (lessened by working women though, certainly), I have seen little concern from women regarding having multiple women as lovers. As often as not, I have seen women almost hoping I had other women, or at least was interesting to other women in this way, which for a healthy young men can only lead to one thing. For my part, the few times I tried it, it ended up more trouble than it was worth. No, not the part of having women jumping me about it, few did. It was the hassle of visiting this one, then that one, spending money here then there, and trying to do my own things on top of it. Women are expensive in more ways than one. Oh, sure, there were some women who wouldn't play multiples at all. Then again, I think they were first timers or had been raised in specific ways or had seen their father 'cheat' on their mother and didn't like it. I was always perfectly honest about it, though too. And, I was never married, so there was that.
Further, at least if the economy collapses and life goes back to the hard old days where men work hard and die young, it will make a reemergence. When women did everything by hand, it was much easier to do the work with four or six hands than with two. From rearing to cooking to washing, work was heavy and back-breaking. If the world of work returns to the very hard, too hard for women, and men become just as hard because of it and therefore won't tolerate a weak worker getting the same pay, women will again be home-bound. I do think things will change. Imagine no electricity, no engines or few engines, and the need for wood, coal, and the ability to lift a hundred pounds often or even swing a two pound axe or pick or shovel all day. It could happen, and in the blink of an eye. Just taking care of widows would almost obligate some, many, to such a situation.
Just... thinking. And, no, like I said, I don't actually look forward to such a time. Women ARE a hassle. It might truly have been men who devised marriage as a singular institution and moral code, but for themselves. Whoever invented it, instituted it, though... they weren't good at keeping it. That is all I know for sure. At least men and women aren't good at monogamy completely. Oh, whatever. It has just been on my mind and I want more answers. "Just because" has never been good enough, ever. And I hate when some one says it's God's way when they have zero evidence and in fact most evidence points to just the opposite.
.
No, no, not a consideration. However, I have been wondering about something for some time. Polygamy has been of academic interest. No, it isn't a common practice where I live and the Mormon church has left it behind, not in legal part but in actual doctrine and dogma. So, that isn't what it causing the questions in my mind. The thing is, after being told all my life that this practice is incorrect, I have yet to find a religious reason for the ending of the practice. Christ was a Jew. And, at that time, I do believe that marrying the wife of a deceased brother required Polygamy, as most men were married already. Christ said nothing about this.
Nor can I find, in the Catholic Church, anything more than that the notion of marrying more than one woman was ever officially outlawed. It has simply become the practice. In minor research, so far, it seems that the early church only allowed one marriage, but did allow for having other women. Which, actually, seems worse than having two wives as there is little in the way of assurances to the other women. Perhaps the Church boxed itself in and sort of lost the fight on legalistic or moral grounds based on what I suggest. And, while finally giving over to the notion of a single wife and no other women, it didn't really follow through. But as laws became absolute and the state gained power, it took the notions from the Church and cemented them. In any case, I see no religious authority to bar multiple wives save a tradition that is no older, give or take, than the reformation. Oddly, the reformation accepted this unwarranted practice of monogamy.
Actually, other than social stigma potentially, and economic concerns (lessened by working women though, certainly), I have seen little concern from women regarding having multiple women as lovers. As often as not, I have seen women almost hoping I had other women, or at least was interesting to other women in this way, which for a healthy young men can only lead to one thing. For my part, the few times I tried it, it ended up more trouble than it was worth. No, not the part of having women jumping me about it, few did. It was the hassle of visiting this one, then that one, spending money here then there, and trying to do my own things on top of it. Women are expensive in more ways than one. Oh, sure, there were some women who wouldn't play multiples at all. Then again, I think they were first timers or had been raised in specific ways or had seen their father 'cheat' on their mother and didn't like it. I was always perfectly honest about it, though too. And, I was never married, so there was that.
Further, at least if the economy collapses and life goes back to the hard old days where men work hard and die young, it will make a reemergence. When women did everything by hand, it was much easier to do the work with four or six hands than with two. From rearing to cooking to washing, work was heavy and back-breaking. If the world of work returns to the very hard, too hard for women, and men become just as hard because of it and therefore won't tolerate a weak worker getting the same pay, women will again be home-bound. I do think things will change. Imagine no electricity, no engines or few engines, and the need for wood, coal, and the ability to lift a hundred pounds often or even swing a two pound axe or pick or shovel all day. It could happen, and in the blink of an eye. Just taking care of widows would almost obligate some, many, to such a situation.
Just... thinking. And, no, like I said, I don't actually look forward to such a time. Women ARE a hassle. It might truly have been men who devised marriage as a singular institution and moral code, but for themselves. Whoever invented it, instituted it, though... they weren't good at keeping it. That is all I know for sure. At least men and women aren't good at monogamy completely. Oh, whatever. It has just been on my mind and I want more answers. "Just because" has never been good enough, ever. And I hate when some one says it's God's way when they have zero evidence and in fact most evidence points to just the opposite.
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Reviewing electric use.
.
.
Two things can be noted right off the bat. Firs, I think electric heating is not the way to go. It quadruples my energy use. Barring the months where I use that heating, I come in somewhere between 450 and 650 kWhrs of consumption. I suspect I could work on that a bit, too. Just leaving all lights on is a common occurrence here, well the kitchen (though that is fluorescent), the living room (a single bulb lamp), my bedroom (another single bulb lamp), and the four bulb overhead light in the computer room. As well, I usually have the computer on. Sometimes the television as well. No, I hadn't even been thinking along the lines of limiting use to see how low I could get it. The other thing to note is that, after falling behind and struggling to get caught up on payments, and finally automatically sending them $150 a month, I am $350 and a bit more ahead on that bill. I would love to have it be automatic, but they will only do that if I go paperless (I refuse to go paperless because of my problems with keeping my computer functional. I want to be able to track the bill, or at least see it.)
Anyway, just ending electric heat will help a great deal. If I could figure out my schedule so I could be up during the day, thus not needing light, that would help too. But, that has been an ongoing struggle my whole life. I doubt if I can do much about it, at this time. Still, I will endeavor to struggle, or... somethin'. How much that will raise my gas bill though, is a whole other story. Only time will tell. Then again, and too, I don't necessarily need to run around in my skivvies. I suppose wearing some clothes might help. :p Damn all-growed-up deck-apes, anyway! My blessed mothers did try! Ah well.
So, looking at 650 kWhrs is a lot better than looking at 2,130 kWhrs, for sure. A 3,500 watt system (assuming no losses, just work with me, and that this is per hour production) would need six hours and twelve minutes (give or take) to provide the a days worth of energy for a 650 kWhr month. (I am using maximum as my standard for example, and would in designing a system anyway. More so since I planning on going off-grid eventually.) Now, losses of at least 15% would come into play if I converted that energy into AC, thus making using some or most of that in a DC grid even better. (I do hate fluorescent lighting though, to be perfectly honest.) Still, if I am seeing this correctly, that is about how it works out. Given that I only get about two hours of useful sun in the winter (if that is correct), that would, with two systems, give me 4 hours at 3,500 wats, so, 420 kWhrs for those months.
Now, because of winter, doubling that might seem reasonable if I am not sure about affordable. And, the best case scenario regarding panels, I have seen so far, would require 28 panels in the 6' x 3' range!?! Yeah, okay. Even 14 panels of that size for a 3500 kWhr system would be a bit of a stretch. Scale, money, use, size, placement, shape. Ouch. Adding in cutting back on energy use and eliminating electric heating and at least temporarily having it grid-tied, would cover most of my energy use. But probably not quite, even so, in the heart of winter. But it does give me a starting point, a theory from which to work. An idea by which to begin planning, comparing. The good thing, assuming no emp blast during that time, is that in the warmer of six or seven months, I would be getting some money back from the system. For another couple of months I would probably just be breaking even. The final few months I would be paying a much lesser than current electric bill. Let me see, assuming (and rightly) that in a grid-tied, duel 3.5 kWhr system, I would end up paying no utilities (and might make some money), and assuming the system lasts 25 years without costs, at $150 a month, it would come out to (at $150 or $120 a month in utilities, not including anything electrical buyback), a savings in utilities of $45,000 or $36,000. A lot of assumptions there though. D.C. doesn't seem to think it pays for itself, but... if the warranties hold water, it would seem to pay for itself. Am I missing something?
I tried to look over the gas bill online but can't seem to log in or something. A simple cast iron stove (soapstone would be nicer, but sheesh, have you see the price of those?) would eliminate that bill, though whether wood would be economical is another matter entirely. Then again, if I use even eight cords a year (at the current prices I have seen quoted of $120 a cord), that would be $960 a year. Further, I am pretty sure I would use far less, more like four to five cords a year, so $480 to $600. Hmmm, it is just that upfront cost. Between the cook stove and a minor heating stove, plus installation, that would come in around $8k to $15k, if I did my adding correctly before. Further, a cooking stove can also be arranged to handle much of, if not all, the hot water needs of a home. Supplemented with a hot water heater, for those times when a cook stove is not wanted (summer) and add in the solar energy system, it could work quite well. What, the 21st Century Amish? Well, yeah. Sort of. Not a bad comparison I should think, in the secular way. Or more in a cultural way?
Doh! I hate seeing it all right there but just not quite being able to touch it. I suppose like all good things, one must simply abide their time and dollars.
.
Two things can be noted right off the bat. Firs, I think electric heating is not the way to go. It quadruples my energy use. Barring the months where I use that heating, I come in somewhere between 450 and 650 kWhrs of consumption. I suspect I could work on that a bit, too. Just leaving all lights on is a common occurrence here, well the kitchen (though that is fluorescent), the living room (a single bulb lamp), my bedroom (another single bulb lamp), and the four bulb overhead light in the computer room. As well, I usually have the computer on. Sometimes the television as well. No, I hadn't even been thinking along the lines of limiting use to see how low I could get it. The other thing to note is that, after falling behind and struggling to get caught up on payments, and finally automatically sending them $150 a month, I am $350 and a bit more ahead on that bill. I would love to have it be automatic, but they will only do that if I go paperless (I refuse to go paperless because of my problems with keeping my computer functional. I want to be able to track the bill, or at least see it.)
Anyway, just ending electric heat will help a great deal. If I could figure out my schedule so I could be up during the day, thus not needing light, that would help too. But, that has been an ongoing struggle my whole life. I doubt if I can do much about it, at this time. Still, I will endeavor to struggle, or... somethin'. How much that will raise my gas bill though, is a whole other story. Only time will tell. Then again, and too, I don't necessarily need to run around in my skivvies. I suppose wearing some clothes might help. :p Damn all-growed-up deck-apes, anyway! My blessed mothers did try! Ah well.
So, looking at 650 kWhrs is a lot better than looking at 2,130 kWhrs, for sure. A 3,500 watt system (assuming no losses, just work with me, and that this is per hour production) would need six hours and twelve minutes (give or take) to provide the a days worth of energy for a 650 kWhr month. (I am using maximum as my standard for example, and would in designing a system anyway. More so since I planning on going off-grid eventually.) Now, losses of at least 15% would come into play if I converted that energy into AC, thus making using some or most of that in a DC grid even better. (I do hate fluorescent lighting though, to be perfectly honest.) Still, if I am seeing this correctly, that is about how it works out. Given that I only get about two hours of useful sun in the winter (if that is correct), that would, with two systems, give me 4 hours at 3,500 wats, so, 420 kWhrs for those months.
Now, because of winter, doubling that might seem reasonable if I am not sure about affordable. And, the best case scenario regarding panels, I have seen so far, would require 28 panels in the 6' x 3' range!?! Yeah, okay. Even 14 panels of that size for a 3500 kWhr system would be a bit of a stretch. Scale, money, use, size, placement, shape. Ouch. Adding in cutting back on energy use and eliminating electric heating and at least temporarily having it grid-tied, would cover most of my energy use. But probably not quite, even so, in the heart of winter. But it does give me a starting point, a theory from which to work. An idea by which to begin planning, comparing. The good thing, assuming no emp blast during that time, is that in the warmer of six or seven months, I would be getting some money back from the system. For another couple of months I would probably just be breaking even. The final few months I would be paying a much lesser than current electric bill. Let me see, assuming (and rightly) that in a grid-tied, duel 3.5 kWhr system, I would end up paying no utilities (and might make some money), and assuming the system lasts 25 years without costs, at $150 a month, it would come out to (at $150 or $120 a month in utilities, not including anything electrical buyback), a savings in utilities of $45,000 or $36,000. A lot of assumptions there though. D.C. doesn't seem to think it pays for itself, but... if the warranties hold water, it would seem to pay for itself. Am I missing something?
I tried to look over the gas bill online but can't seem to log in or something. A simple cast iron stove (soapstone would be nicer, but sheesh, have you see the price of those?) would eliminate that bill, though whether wood would be economical is another matter entirely. Then again, if I use even eight cords a year (at the current prices I have seen quoted of $120 a cord), that would be $960 a year. Further, I am pretty sure I would use far less, more like four to five cords a year, so $480 to $600. Hmmm, it is just that upfront cost. Between the cook stove and a minor heating stove, plus installation, that would come in around $8k to $15k, if I did my adding correctly before. Further, a cooking stove can also be arranged to handle much of, if not all, the hot water needs of a home. Supplemented with a hot water heater, for those times when a cook stove is not wanted (summer) and add in the solar energy system, it could work quite well. What, the 21st Century Amish? Well, yeah. Sort of. Not a bad comparison I should think, in the secular way. Or more in a cultural way?
Doh! I hate seeing it all right there but just not quite being able to touch it. I suppose like all good things, one must simply abide their time and dollars.
Nope.
.
.
The book is a flop. It was written by a greeny who thinks the government should be in control, except that we shouldn't be using any energy. We should all just live off the land, or something. No, I don't agree. I just think that too many of our needs have become too dependent on too large of systems to remain dependable. When all fails, the government couldn't, if it wanted to do so, fix the problem. Any problem. Much like food, personal security, energy, and everything else, it is really up to you. Right now we have systems that keep food flowing, supply energy relatively cheaply, offer products and services for everything you ever needed and many things you simply want (or think you want... ugh). We are also living so far beyond our economic (but well within our natural resource) means that there is no way it can continue. Greens, as I see it, simply confuse the two.
Most greens, from what I have seen, are all talk anyway. Oh, sure, they will buy that electric car (so long as they have it as their show car with the Caddie, or Hummer, or Porsche in the garage). There are some young idealists and woman of all ages who buy such things (and quietly, after they realize the huge problems, get rid of them on the quiet, at a loss, while bragging about having them, until they have the new car, after which they completely flush the memory and bringing it up causes a hissy fit). The rich ones I have known have usually been some of the most abusive, in regards to energy and natural resources, of all the people I have known. One who just loved the earth and all that... had a home in Arizona, on the grounds of which she "grew" an amazing lush plant and tree filled oasis, using untold amounts of water and energy to sustain the unnatural. She was just creepy regarding these things and on all fronts of "the earth" and such. Got the money and her current income from divorce too, of course. I guess the greens I have known are three quarters of why I don't believe in "green". The other three quarters (it only seems to add up to more than 100%, hush) is the total fiction behind the notion of "green".
Practical efficiency and clean living? That is something else entirely. A rich man who lives in Arizona, but instead of trying to create a rain forest merely enhances his stead so as to highlight the native? Well, better yet, how about if you live anywhere, rich, middle-class, or poor, and you just abstain from the ludicrous, live your life, enjoy a family and pets, grow what of your food you can, and lead a nice normal humble life. Is that too much to ask? But don't spend your time worrying about having a light bulb lit, appliances so frugal they are all but useless, spending your hard earned gains on gimmicks that beyond being a further waste of money and also potentially being a hazard but also ending up adding to the waste of the world, or your next breath.
No, the book is junk. It did, very slightly, demystify solar power. It also does have some functional diy projects, such as a solar powered roof vent. I am not sure I can trust his book, but if so, it seems the crux of a system is in a very few components; solar panels, inverters/chargers, charge controllers, batteries, wiring, and maybe a tie-in (which would be integrated into the inverter/charger I am considering). He didn't bother getting into nitty gritty details, didn't offer a single formula, and was just preaching to the "kicky avant-garde" rich kids he went to Ivy League grad school with who, if they should be bothered by such strenuous activity of actually considering the new pop idea of solar energy would just have some servant create the thing, but would want to know enough to take full credit for it, assuming they could do so on someone else's nickle somehow. I've got to tell you, if you can't do the basic math, with a moderately well written guide, with such few components... Perhaps you should go back to school or get a contractor. As for me, I am now in search of a more technical manual that hooks all the components together in a general way, offering formulas for scale, things to consider, dangers, and resources for specifics. I am most certain someone out there has bothered to write such a book. A home energy audit and a solid review of my energy use, then tripling it in case a woman type ends up living here. (Yes, women use a ton more energy. No wonder they have guilt about living and such and thus are so often "greenies". What is that, anyway? If they bear young, they perfectly make up for it. If they don't? Not so much.)
So, now to begin digging. Well, not figuratively. How I will actually install a system is another thing. If I can get back to how I was doing until the last medicine increase, or perhaps the one before that, I might make my way to the effort. And, until the money comes in, it is all academic in any case. It will come down to a convergence of improbabilities? Maybe. But isn't that always the case? Yet, her I sit, typing, in spite of probably every number cruncher with the capacity to know enough to figure the probability of me being here doing that left scratching their head and wondering how. I already am impossible. (For more proof, ask any woman I have known, they'll tell you.) It could happen. And, if the right situations (that have a real possibility to occur) do occur, it will happen. But, if I have one of the legs, a solid plan with the components chosen in size and volume, firmly planted on solid ground when the other shoes drop, this plan has a much better chance of happening, and sooner rather than later.
Some odd things I noted, while looking at components. While price is a factor on any component, it is not necessarily linear. For example, a 250 watt panel is double in cost and size of an 85 watt panel. Of course, at three times the output, it is much more economical in size and output in a system aimed for that size output or more. Now, given things need to be in pairs, save minor stand alone devices, scale might have some influence. Physical size might be important to someone with limited sun access points. But to be honest, I think many contractors think purely with the lowest dollar in mind, thinking people want the cheapest (even when in truth it isn't, just looks like it). While it might be difficult for a single guy to look through, and keep up on, the product lines out there, you would think businesses would. Now, I can't say that they don't, I can only say I have reviewed a couple of notions from sites which indicate that this is not done. And while it might seem easy enough to review a contractor's offer, can most do that in a reasonable manner? Can they do it full depth? I worry that a contractor (the book really pushes for those) will use the cheapest components and lowest grade wiring possible. Is that really what you want to depend upon? Bah!
I need to find a better source for scaling, review my energy usage, put a system together, and consider dc appliances and lighting, and such. A book would be better. The internet is okay but this loaner machine doesn't even always save bookmarks for some reason and the internet flows and is mostly about sales. It is no longer the information superhighway, it is merely the commerce supernet. Of course, a book, by the time it is written and published, might be woeful dated. Though the newest technologies should often be avoided like the plague until they have been tried and trued by those who can afford to tinker. Hmm, I might also begin looking into whether the knob and tube electrical system is functional or is just remnant, and what to do about that.
By the way... The book indicated that most people have their fuse boxes outside of their homes. I have, in all my time, never known of such. Is that common? His name sounds German, perhaps he is and that is how they do things? In any case, that is something I want remedied. I find it unnatural.
.
The book is a flop. It was written by a greeny who thinks the government should be in control, except that we shouldn't be using any energy. We should all just live off the land, or something. No, I don't agree. I just think that too many of our needs have become too dependent on too large of systems to remain dependable. When all fails, the government couldn't, if it wanted to do so, fix the problem. Any problem. Much like food, personal security, energy, and everything else, it is really up to you. Right now we have systems that keep food flowing, supply energy relatively cheaply, offer products and services for everything you ever needed and many things you simply want (or think you want... ugh). We are also living so far beyond our economic (but well within our natural resource) means that there is no way it can continue. Greens, as I see it, simply confuse the two.
Most greens, from what I have seen, are all talk anyway. Oh, sure, they will buy that electric car (so long as they have it as their show car with the Caddie, or Hummer, or Porsche in the garage). There are some young idealists and woman of all ages who buy such things (and quietly, after they realize the huge problems, get rid of them on the quiet, at a loss, while bragging about having them, until they have the new car, after which they completely flush the memory and bringing it up causes a hissy fit). The rich ones I have known have usually been some of the most abusive, in regards to energy and natural resources, of all the people I have known. One who just loved the earth and all that... had a home in Arizona, on the grounds of which she "grew" an amazing lush plant and tree filled oasis, using untold amounts of water and energy to sustain the unnatural. She was just creepy regarding these things and on all fronts of "the earth" and such. Got the money and her current income from divorce too, of course. I guess the greens I have known are three quarters of why I don't believe in "green". The other three quarters (it only seems to add up to more than 100%, hush) is the total fiction behind the notion of "green".
Practical efficiency and clean living? That is something else entirely. A rich man who lives in Arizona, but instead of trying to create a rain forest merely enhances his stead so as to highlight the native? Well, better yet, how about if you live anywhere, rich, middle-class, or poor, and you just abstain from the ludicrous, live your life, enjoy a family and pets, grow what of your food you can, and lead a nice normal humble life. Is that too much to ask? But don't spend your time worrying about having a light bulb lit, appliances so frugal they are all but useless, spending your hard earned gains on gimmicks that beyond being a further waste of money and also potentially being a hazard but also ending up adding to the waste of the world, or your next breath.
No, the book is junk. It did, very slightly, demystify solar power. It also does have some functional diy projects, such as a solar powered roof vent. I am not sure I can trust his book, but if so, it seems the crux of a system is in a very few components; solar panels, inverters/chargers, charge controllers, batteries, wiring, and maybe a tie-in (which would be integrated into the inverter/charger I am considering). He didn't bother getting into nitty gritty details, didn't offer a single formula, and was just preaching to the "kicky avant-garde" rich kids he went to Ivy League grad school with who, if they should be bothered by such strenuous activity of actually considering the new pop idea of solar energy would just have some servant create the thing, but would want to know enough to take full credit for it, assuming they could do so on someone else's nickle somehow. I've got to tell you, if you can't do the basic math, with a moderately well written guide, with such few components... Perhaps you should go back to school or get a contractor. As for me, I am now in search of a more technical manual that hooks all the components together in a general way, offering formulas for scale, things to consider, dangers, and resources for specifics. I am most certain someone out there has bothered to write such a book. A home energy audit and a solid review of my energy use, then tripling it in case a woman type ends up living here. (Yes, women use a ton more energy. No wonder they have guilt about living and such and thus are so often "greenies". What is that, anyway? If they bear young, they perfectly make up for it. If they don't? Not so much.)
So, now to begin digging. Well, not figuratively. How I will actually install a system is another thing. If I can get back to how I was doing until the last medicine increase, or perhaps the one before that, I might make my way to the effort. And, until the money comes in, it is all academic in any case. It will come down to a convergence of improbabilities? Maybe. But isn't that always the case? Yet, her I sit, typing, in spite of probably every number cruncher with the capacity to know enough to figure the probability of me being here doing that left scratching their head and wondering how. I already am impossible. (For more proof, ask any woman I have known, they'll tell you.) It could happen. And, if the right situations (that have a real possibility to occur) do occur, it will happen. But, if I have one of the legs, a solid plan with the components chosen in size and volume, firmly planted on solid ground when the other shoes drop, this plan has a much better chance of happening, and sooner rather than later.
Some odd things I noted, while looking at components. While price is a factor on any component, it is not necessarily linear. For example, a 250 watt panel is double in cost and size of an 85 watt panel. Of course, at three times the output, it is much more economical in size and output in a system aimed for that size output or more. Now, given things need to be in pairs, save minor stand alone devices, scale might have some influence. Physical size might be important to someone with limited sun access points. But to be honest, I think many contractors think purely with the lowest dollar in mind, thinking people want the cheapest (even when in truth it isn't, just looks like it). While it might be difficult for a single guy to look through, and keep up on, the product lines out there, you would think businesses would. Now, I can't say that they don't, I can only say I have reviewed a couple of notions from sites which indicate that this is not done. And while it might seem easy enough to review a contractor's offer, can most do that in a reasonable manner? Can they do it full depth? I worry that a contractor (the book really pushes for those) will use the cheapest components and lowest grade wiring possible. Is that really what you want to depend upon? Bah!
I need to find a better source for scaling, review my energy usage, put a system together, and consider dc appliances and lighting, and such. A book would be better. The internet is okay but this loaner machine doesn't even always save bookmarks for some reason and the internet flows and is mostly about sales. It is no longer the information superhighway, it is merely the commerce supernet. Of course, a book, by the time it is written and published, might be woeful dated. Though the newest technologies should often be avoided like the plague until they have been tried and trued by those who can afford to tinker. Hmm, I might also begin looking into whether the knob and tube electrical system is functional or is just remnant, and what to do about that.
By the way... The book indicated that most people have their fuse boxes outside of their homes. I have, in all my time, never known of such. Is that common? His name sounds German, perhaps he is and that is how they do things? In any case, that is something I want remedied. I find it unnatural.
I'm not sure if the solar power book was worth the money.
.
.
So far. From what I have read it is quite general. I haven't seen formulas, concepts, or... anything. I am still rooting around though. It looks like the author believes completely in tied-in systems, with the only real exception being kits for mountaintop retreats or other places too far from the grid. Further, from what I am seeing, he is talking about what components do but not how to figure out the ratings, or how to decide which components are best, how to scale a system, or any of it. His goal seems to be to make you want a grid-tied system and have contractors install it, which he thinks will add very little to the project in the way of expense. It isn't a book, so far, so much to bring dummies up to speed but to keep dummies dumb. I am hoping there will be more useful information eventually.
While I never completed engineering school, or electrical tech school, I actually have more of an understanding than even I probably expect. Can I test out on it? Probably not. Can I used a tech manual to assist and get something figured out for volts, amps, AC, DC, fuses, and losses? Yeah, most likely. I was hoping this was the book. On the good side I might have some sort of idea what components go into a system, what they do, which parts are most susceptible to failure or problems, and a few other things, from which I might find a better book or other sources of information by which to create a way to create various scalings of systems to begin comparing prices, by which to begin checking need/want versus price. To be honest, if you have all the components anymore, in the correct capacity to work together, it is pretty much plug and play. Or, that is my humble opinion. It is not like you have to gear each device independently, programming it to work with your exact system. Oh, sure, there might be some settings, there might be some considerations that aren't obvious (due to losses, capacity, switching times, and such). But most components, from the solid manufacturers, are sort of made for dummies. They don't expect home-owning diy'ers, let alone contractors, to be professional electrical technicians who also have a degree in electrical engineering! That type of system will fail always and anywhere, save in a lab which employs such (and I would even have my doubts in many of those).
One thing that I can probably arrange is a home energy audit. They don't cost very much but they can do a great deal toward figuring out how, in the first place, to tighten up my home energy use, regardless if I go solar or not. I won't say the book gave me the idea, but it has cemented the idea and given it prominence in near future goals.
Oh, sure, I could have a company or three tromp through my home and give me quotes, with never ending mail and email asking when I am going to buy. I just don't want that kind of hassle. The book suggests that the energy company might not allow a grid tie-in, sort of required for a larger system (at least initially because of rebates), without it being contracted. I sort of suspect there may be issues, but because of the general notion in the Utah rebate program indicating self design and installation might not have to meet as high of a standard as professionally installed systems, I am wondering. Then again, that provision might be aimed more (or solely) at cabins and outbuilding type solar power systems. More must be learned on all that.
Back to reading. *shrug* Maybe I can pick up something of use.
.
So far. From what I have read it is quite general. I haven't seen formulas, concepts, or... anything. I am still rooting around though. It looks like the author believes completely in tied-in systems, with the only real exception being kits for mountaintop retreats or other places too far from the grid. Further, from what I am seeing, he is talking about what components do but not how to figure out the ratings, or how to decide which components are best, how to scale a system, or any of it. His goal seems to be to make you want a grid-tied system and have contractors install it, which he thinks will add very little to the project in the way of expense. It isn't a book, so far, so much to bring dummies up to speed but to keep dummies dumb. I am hoping there will be more useful information eventually.
While I never completed engineering school, or electrical tech school, I actually have more of an understanding than even I probably expect. Can I test out on it? Probably not. Can I used a tech manual to assist and get something figured out for volts, amps, AC, DC, fuses, and losses? Yeah, most likely. I was hoping this was the book. On the good side I might have some sort of idea what components go into a system, what they do, which parts are most susceptible to failure or problems, and a few other things, from which I might find a better book or other sources of information by which to create a way to create various scalings of systems to begin comparing prices, by which to begin checking need/want versus price. To be honest, if you have all the components anymore, in the correct capacity to work together, it is pretty much plug and play. Or, that is my humble opinion. It is not like you have to gear each device independently, programming it to work with your exact system. Oh, sure, there might be some settings, there might be some considerations that aren't obvious (due to losses, capacity, switching times, and such). But most components, from the solid manufacturers, are sort of made for dummies. They don't expect home-owning diy'ers, let alone contractors, to be professional electrical technicians who also have a degree in electrical engineering! That type of system will fail always and anywhere, save in a lab which employs such (and I would even have my doubts in many of those).
One thing that I can probably arrange is a home energy audit. They don't cost very much but they can do a great deal toward figuring out how, in the first place, to tighten up my home energy use, regardless if I go solar or not. I won't say the book gave me the idea, but it has cemented the idea and given it prominence in near future goals.
Oh, sure, I could have a company or three tromp through my home and give me quotes, with never ending mail and email asking when I am going to buy. I just don't want that kind of hassle. The book suggests that the energy company might not allow a grid tie-in, sort of required for a larger system (at least initially because of rebates), without it being contracted. I sort of suspect there may be issues, but because of the general notion in the Utah rebate program indicating self design and installation might not have to meet as high of a standard as professionally installed systems, I am wondering. Then again, that provision might be aimed more (or solely) at cabins and outbuilding type solar power systems. More must be learned on all that.
Back to reading. *shrug* Maybe I can pick up something of use.
I woke at midnight, or so.
.
.
Then promptly went right back to bed. I could have gotten up. But I wanted a bit more sleep to, recharge more or something like that. I will just miss medicine today, again. But I will set up my medicine container for the next two weeks today, at the new doses and start tomorrow. That might give me a chance to fight back through at these intermediate levels. Dangerous? Everything I do, at this point, has flaws, pitfalls, and dangers, as I see things. And I don't have the doctors on my side. They just want what they want and aren't worried about my ability to live within what they want. They have a good life, what the heck to they care? For them it is academic, for me it is very real. No, I know, they are just trying.
My mother called. I let her know that my plans to clean the place up before her arrival were sinking faster than my notions of going back to college. Not a problem, she suggested. We will see. She asked about the angiography. She was pleased to know that not only had I arranged it but that I have lodging arranged for our stay. I told her I couldn't necessarily find a room that allowed smoking, just to let her know up front and be forewarned, but she was fine with that too. She was hoping for a pool or sauna room or something. I think the place has that, but can't swear to it. When you look at a dozen places, details blur. She is set to arrive in about a week. I still hope to get some more work done, even if it's just trimming the edges. She will have to drive my 'rig', to familiarize herself with it, before she tries to do so in the traffic of SLC. She is actually a good driver, excellent, or was for most of my life and I see no reason for that to change (though I will ask that she turn off and not use her cell phone, that is the one thing she does that can be frightful and SLC traffic won't allow for it).
I had a visitor today. My word I have industrious neighbors. Anyway, he wanted to visit and discuss some things. This Saturday the first ward is having a... day of work contribution type day. They wanted to know if I would allow them to work on my yard. Well, I invited them in, and asked pardon for how my house looks. He said no problem, that his house might be messy at times (though I suspect that was just being nice). He had two of his young ones with him. We talked for a bit. I explained that I have been rather ill, and he sort of knew that from the last time he visited. But that time I didn't realize it was a heart issue, which changes much in minds, what is thought of an illness. He also asked if I would be interested in helping with data processing, but that it wouldn't be required, as they are putting information into a database. I suggested that is something I could do, and easily.
This man has six children, a huge garden, teaches fourth grade, and works another job or three, to make ends meet. Nothing like the harsh reality of real people to bring perspective, though I have little choice either. But letting people know that, if the medicine (which is brutal to take all by itself) doesn't work, that the doctors want to put you on a heart transplant recipient list (regardless that I wouldn't do that), makes a world of difference in their understanding of your condition. Mental issues? Not so much. Most people are half crazy with work, family, and religious fulfillment. But most of them aren't on death's door. No worry, though, I suggested. I don't think it'll kill me. It'll just slow me down a little more. *grins* I teased that the meds fulfilled the old saying about a chip on the shoulder. The illness being one chip, the meds being another chip, and that somehow a chip on both shoulders makes me BalanceD! Heh
He asked if I would be up a little later. And despite it being a long day, I said I would. At around 19:00 he brought over a bunch of garden items and fruits from their bushes! Berries are fruits, right? Potatoes, corn, berries, tomatoes, and such. So, yes, with a 'little work' you can have a fantastic garden hereabouts by the way! My word, it was like the best you can hope for from a farmers market! *sigh* And here I sit. The only thing of note that I do is, continue breathing... if that might actually be a trick at times. Still, it is depressing. Ah well, I'll deal with it. On noes! A third chip! Hmm, I'll root around for a fourth chip. In pairs it works.
Well, so it goes. Another day in the life. At least my humor stays. I'll probably be laughing while I'm dying, if it doesn't hurt too much or when I get past the pain. And, yeah, I like that idea. I probably came in laughing, if my mother didn't think it was all that funny. But then she didn't seem to have a problem putting me in there in the first place. *chuckles* 'Now where is my milk, woman!'
.
Then promptly went right back to bed. I could have gotten up. But I wanted a bit more sleep to, recharge more or something like that. I will just miss medicine today, again. But I will set up my medicine container for the next two weeks today, at the new doses and start tomorrow. That might give me a chance to fight back through at these intermediate levels. Dangerous? Everything I do, at this point, has flaws, pitfalls, and dangers, as I see things. And I don't have the doctors on my side. They just want what they want and aren't worried about my ability to live within what they want. They have a good life, what the heck to they care? For them it is academic, for me it is very real. No, I know, they are just trying.
My mother called. I let her know that my plans to clean the place up before her arrival were sinking faster than my notions of going back to college. Not a problem, she suggested. We will see. She asked about the angiography. She was pleased to know that not only had I arranged it but that I have lodging arranged for our stay. I told her I couldn't necessarily find a room that allowed smoking, just to let her know up front and be forewarned, but she was fine with that too. She was hoping for a pool or sauna room or something. I think the place has that, but can't swear to it. When you look at a dozen places, details blur. She is set to arrive in about a week. I still hope to get some more work done, even if it's just trimming the edges. She will have to drive my 'rig', to familiarize herself with it, before she tries to do so in the traffic of SLC. She is actually a good driver, excellent, or was for most of my life and I see no reason for that to change (though I will ask that she turn off and not use her cell phone, that is the one thing she does that can be frightful and SLC traffic won't allow for it).
I had a visitor today. My word I have industrious neighbors. Anyway, he wanted to visit and discuss some things. This Saturday the first ward is having a... day of work contribution type day. They wanted to know if I would allow them to work on my yard. Well, I invited them in, and asked pardon for how my house looks. He said no problem, that his house might be messy at times (though I suspect that was just being nice). He had two of his young ones with him. We talked for a bit. I explained that I have been rather ill, and he sort of knew that from the last time he visited. But that time I didn't realize it was a heart issue, which changes much in minds, what is thought of an illness. He also asked if I would be interested in helping with data processing, but that it wouldn't be required, as they are putting information into a database. I suggested that is something I could do, and easily.
This man has six children, a huge garden, teaches fourth grade, and works another job or three, to make ends meet. Nothing like the harsh reality of real people to bring perspective, though I have little choice either. But letting people know that, if the medicine (which is brutal to take all by itself) doesn't work, that the doctors want to put you on a heart transplant recipient list (regardless that I wouldn't do that), makes a world of difference in their understanding of your condition. Mental issues? Not so much. Most people are half crazy with work, family, and religious fulfillment. But most of them aren't on death's door. No worry, though, I suggested. I don't think it'll kill me. It'll just slow me down a little more. *grins* I teased that the meds fulfilled the old saying about a chip on the shoulder. The illness being one chip, the meds being another chip, and that somehow a chip on both shoulders makes me BalanceD! Heh
He asked if I would be up a little later. And despite it being a long day, I said I would. At around 19:00 he brought over a bunch of garden items and fruits from their bushes! Berries are fruits, right? Potatoes, corn, berries, tomatoes, and such. So, yes, with a 'little work' you can have a fantastic garden hereabouts by the way! My word, it was like the best you can hope for from a farmers market! *sigh* And here I sit. The only thing of note that I do is, continue breathing... if that might actually be a trick at times. Still, it is depressing. Ah well, I'll deal with it. On noes! A third chip! Hmm, I'll root around for a fourth chip. In pairs it works.
Well, so it goes. Another day in the life. At least my humor stays. I'll probably be laughing while I'm dying, if it doesn't hurt too much or when I get past the pain. And, yeah, I like that idea. I probably came in laughing, if my mother didn't think it was all that funny. But then she didn't seem to have a problem putting me in there in the first place. *chuckles* 'Now where is my milk, woman!'
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Not too bad.
.
.
Speaking with the doctors, I knew they would try to argue me out of dropping as much as I wanted. And I let them. Of course, only on a temporary basis. If two weeks at their suggested intermediate step-down of dosage doesn't allow me to gain function, I will kick it down some more. My problem is that, as it cools, it is already going to be more difficult to step up, physically. Hikes are on my list of things to do, though, so the cool might be just fine. Actually, if I regain my weatherproof design, cold won't be a problem so long as there is no snow. The snow, here, when we get it, arrives in feet more than in inches. I don't currently have a means of being mobile in a deep snow. The only skis that are readily available for rental are either flat country cross country or downhill. One is boring as can be (or terrifying if you try downhill with them), the other doesn't seem like all that much exercise for the cost. Anyway, I will try their dosage for two weeks. Otherwise I will kick it down another notch and try, from their, to become more active again.
I found two restaurants I had wanted to sample. I had a meal at each. From what I can tell, so far, I would say they both stand up to their reputation. I had no problem finding them this time and I know why I couldn't find one of them last time I looked. Actually, both of them. One of them is on a side street, while the map sort of shows it on the main street nearby. You have to look up the side street (just a bit, but enough that it was by chance I saw it even this time and it's only visible coming one way (opposite of the way I came last time as well). The other place was not open to traffic across (over) the freeway the last time I was there. Both are now found and locked away. And, by the way, after I took all the time to write the instructions and draw my little map? I remembered it, in that I remembered where it was. I left it right where I wrote it. Maps, directions, and grocery lists all get remembered that way. But hey, without stopping to ask or fumbling at all, I found the places, and the book store.
Oh, finding the bookstore was not as difficult as it seemed. I thought, from the map, that it would be "right chere". Nope, it was in an outdoor sort of mall complex (sort of nifty, actually, like those ski resorts). Anyway, finding the bookstore once I got in wasn't the problem, it was figuring out where I could park that was sort of a pain. Done and done. I headed over to the mall map, figure out where I am, where the bookstore should me... nope... Ah, up. Two story affair. Right there, but now to figure out how to get to it. Stairs, escalator was closer though (if I disfavor those, I am running out of juice, so shorter trumps favoritism). On my way to the escalators though, I spot a chef store. NO! I have been avoiding such places. And it has been a long time since I spent a small fortune on anything. Ah well, my will was weak. I went in. Loverly place. Nothing I need, I kept reminding myself. But, maybe just a timer, so I can get in their system. I grab one. I just want to... look a little more. No! But, there it is, another specialty All-Clad piece, for braising meats more easily (domed lid, the whole thing in stainless, which is my kit). It is 40% off. NO! Ah well, it has been years since I shelled out on my hobby. So I grab it and head to the counter. Every woman in that store, and her children if she had them, thought the same thing and beat me to the punch. *grumble* *women* *grump* *kids* *grump* *luck* Bah! So, I get up there and the guy says, you know, we have a slightly larger one on sale for slight less. Oh? Yes, you have a 9", we have a 10", same domed, stainless, for $6 less. Alrighty then! So, I have a 10" skillet with a domed lid. *sigh* But, but, but...
I escaped with having not bought most of what I wanted, then headed to the book store. Barnes and Nobles it was. The place was huge. I tried to figure out this from that but had no clue. I tried to look lost but it took a while for the one floor lass to see me in distress and ask if I was as lost as I looked. Why yes, now that you mention it. I gave her a brief description of my need, of course, a book for dummies, solar power dummies to be specific. Ah, so she looked it up, and gave me a cue to follow. Not a difficult task, mind you. Just... sayin'. There it was, the only one in stock. The only book regarding solar power I could find. And, right beside it, "The Encyclopedia of Country Living". NO! How much have I spent on meals and at the cookery store? Letma see... There was, and, oh and the, plus tip, then the... Wait! I'm not a fucking accountant! What do I know. So I grabbed the book for dummies (I did notice a book for dummy accountants too... but... nah... then I couldn't do this stuff) and headed for the checkout. I paid and headed out. There I was with another All-Clad, a timer, the dummy book, and yes, the encyclopedia. *sigh* Hush. I'm not an accountant, not even a dummy one.
I thought about running back into town to deposit a check, get an oil change, and deposit my coins. I flipped a rigged coin, and of course, lost. I am bushed. Tomorrow, perhaps. If I wake similarly to how I woke today. Today I woke last night. Well, even close to that, say if I wake at 1:00, 3:00, even 5:00, I should be able to get into town and work on things. The missionaries are returning for a visit in the afternoon. I have read their pamphlet and have some questions. Something about a prophet to lead them, but... To my understanding, Christ was the last prophet. We may have individual prophecies, for us alone, but the prophetic age is over. Prophets will return, but it will not be new prophets, but Elijah and some of the others, near the end times, and then the greatest of prophets will return as King. Prophets, by the way, never lead. They were usually listened to in hard times, but when the threat was over, down a well, over a cliff, or death by stoning (or crucifixion for the greatest of them). Just some thoughts.
Well, it is probably about time for bed. A brief examination of the rest of your works and maybe some news. But, a stripping of all things hot, boots, socks, jeans, and turning on the fan in the bedroom to get the place chilling, then a read. Yeah! Oh yes. Be right back. Then later. Or, something like that. Again, hush!
.
Speaking with the doctors, I knew they would try to argue me out of dropping as much as I wanted. And I let them. Of course, only on a temporary basis. If two weeks at their suggested intermediate step-down of dosage doesn't allow me to gain function, I will kick it down some more. My problem is that, as it cools, it is already going to be more difficult to step up, physically. Hikes are on my list of things to do, though, so the cool might be just fine. Actually, if I regain my weatherproof design, cold won't be a problem so long as there is no snow. The snow, here, when we get it, arrives in feet more than in inches. I don't currently have a means of being mobile in a deep snow. The only skis that are readily available for rental are either flat country cross country or downhill. One is boring as can be (or terrifying if you try downhill with them), the other doesn't seem like all that much exercise for the cost. Anyway, I will try their dosage for two weeks. Otherwise I will kick it down another notch and try, from their, to become more active again.
I found two restaurants I had wanted to sample. I had a meal at each. From what I can tell, so far, I would say they both stand up to their reputation. I had no problem finding them this time and I know why I couldn't find one of them last time I looked. Actually, both of them. One of them is on a side street, while the map sort of shows it on the main street nearby. You have to look up the side street (just a bit, but enough that it was by chance I saw it even this time and it's only visible coming one way (opposite of the way I came last time as well). The other place was not open to traffic across (over) the freeway the last time I was there. Both are now found and locked away. And, by the way, after I took all the time to write the instructions and draw my little map? I remembered it, in that I remembered where it was. I left it right where I wrote it. Maps, directions, and grocery lists all get remembered that way. But hey, without stopping to ask or fumbling at all, I found the places, and the book store.
Oh, finding the bookstore was not as difficult as it seemed. I thought, from the map, that it would be "right chere". Nope, it was in an outdoor sort of mall complex (sort of nifty, actually, like those ski resorts). Anyway, finding the bookstore once I got in wasn't the problem, it was figuring out where I could park that was sort of a pain. Done and done. I headed over to the mall map, figure out where I am, where the bookstore should me... nope... Ah, up. Two story affair. Right there, but now to figure out how to get to it. Stairs, escalator was closer though (if I disfavor those, I am running out of juice, so shorter trumps favoritism). On my way to the escalators though, I spot a chef store. NO! I have been avoiding such places. And it has been a long time since I spent a small fortune on anything. Ah well, my will was weak. I went in. Loverly place. Nothing I need, I kept reminding myself. But, maybe just a timer, so I can get in their system. I grab one. I just want to... look a little more. No! But, there it is, another specialty All-Clad piece, for braising meats more easily (domed lid, the whole thing in stainless, which is my kit). It is 40% off. NO! Ah well, it has been years since I shelled out on my hobby. So I grab it and head to the counter. Every woman in that store, and her children if she had them, thought the same thing and beat me to the punch. *grumble* *women* *grump* *kids* *grump* *luck* Bah! So, I get up there and the guy says, you know, we have a slightly larger one on sale for slight less. Oh? Yes, you have a 9", we have a 10", same domed, stainless, for $6 less. Alrighty then! So, I have a 10" skillet with a domed lid. *sigh* But, but, but...
I escaped with having not bought most of what I wanted, then headed to the book store. Barnes and Nobles it was. The place was huge. I tried to figure out this from that but had no clue. I tried to look lost but it took a while for the one floor lass to see me in distress and ask if I was as lost as I looked. Why yes, now that you mention it. I gave her a brief description of my need, of course, a book for dummies, solar power dummies to be specific. Ah, so she looked it up, and gave me a cue to follow. Not a difficult task, mind you. Just... sayin'. There it was, the only one in stock. The only book regarding solar power I could find. And, right beside it, "The Encyclopedia of Country Living". NO! How much have I spent on meals and at the cookery store? Letma see... There was, and, oh and the, plus tip, then the... Wait! I'm not a fucking accountant! What do I know. So I grabbed the book for dummies (I did notice a book for dummy accountants too... but... nah... then I couldn't do this stuff) and headed for the checkout. I paid and headed out. There I was with another All-Clad, a timer, the dummy book, and yes, the encyclopedia. *sigh* Hush. I'm not an accountant, not even a dummy one.
I thought about running back into town to deposit a check, get an oil change, and deposit my coins. I flipped a rigged coin, and of course, lost. I am bushed. Tomorrow, perhaps. If I wake similarly to how I woke today. Today I woke last night. Well, even close to that, say if I wake at 1:00, 3:00, even 5:00, I should be able to get into town and work on things. The missionaries are returning for a visit in the afternoon. I have read their pamphlet and have some questions. Something about a prophet to lead them, but... To my understanding, Christ was the last prophet. We may have individual prophecies, for us alone, but the prophetic age is over. Prophets will return, but it will not be new prophets, but Elijah and some of the others, near the end times, and then the greatest of prophets will return as King. Prophets, by the way, never lead. They were usually listened to in hard times, but when the threat was over, down a well, over a cliff, or death by stoning (or crucifixion for the greatest of them). Just some thoughts.
Well, it is probably about time for bed. A brief examination of the rest of your works and maybe some news. But, a stripping of all things hot, boots, socks, jeans, and turning on the fan in the bedroom to get the place chilling, then a read. Yeah! Oh yes. Be right back. Then later. Or, something like that. Again, hush!
While looking around...
.
.
There are good and bad things about most states. And, while Utah has it's bad, it also has it's good. Not often will you find a construction that comes off like this.
Yes, you heard that right, a city/state construction project that was built ahead of schedule and underbudget, and yeah, that is expected now. But too, the construction wasn't just to "create and save jobs". It is a functionally well thought out infrastructure capital addition to a growing economy. Utah might not have the room to grow that Texas does, due to limits to how much of a population can be maintained. But for what she has she is putting her best foot forward, and it shows. Now, to work on some of the intense bureaucracy.
As soon as the government figures out that putting women to work is keeping them from marrying and having families, perhaps it will scale back that particular form of 'social welfare'. Yes, buildings full of women, unmarried, hired to do nothing work, is the same as foodstamps or EBT cards, boys and girls. Which might well lead to social changes where a woman will be less likely to go through college for some useless degree and figure out how to find a husband and help him get through. A few things like that begin, and a reshaping of America back to better days will occur. Dominoes, stepping stones, call them what you will. Though I suspect a number of issues will have to go forward all at once, and with some certainty about them and on into some significant future, for the family to again take shape. The family being the key and backbone to any real change, here or there, then or now. As the family goes, so goes the nation. As is, the family is in court with decidedly anti-family "judges" and laws that land them in front of the "judges", or under the gun of such. With half or less women working bureaucratic jobs, or even replaced by men? Bureaucracy will be broken. Good riddance!
I was looking for a particular restaurant, and how to get to it. I would like to take my mother here when we are staying there. I'm not sure I want to stand in a long line though. While I am in town, since it is near a bookstore I would like to visit, I am hoping to get in and try the food. While I have excellent taste in Mexican food, compared to the average, and know "home cooking" from canned, my mother is even more discriminating. If it isn't right, she will go ahead and finish her plate but she gets a "that's crap" look on her face. She was taught the way to do Mexican food without allowances for slack. She expects that from everyone else. We both love Mexican food, too. The problem is, a multicourse meal requires several sauces and production lines which makes it very difficult for one or even two people to really cook. I am hoping this place lives up to it's reputation.
While having my printer working would be nice, the truth is hand writing instructions, then drawing a little map to boot, puts the notion of where to go more positively into my brain. I have found though, that some map programs online are very bad at getting you where you want to go. Following their instructions, there are two places I have never found. I suppose I could call, but time has never been on my side. It is probably close to where the maps indicated, just not exactly there. I do what I can.
Have a good day. Time to shower and such and head out.
.
There are good and bad things about most states. And, while Utah has it's bad, it also has it's good. Not often will you find a construction that comes off like this.
Yes, you heard that right, a city/state construction project that was built ahead of schedule and underbudget, and yeah, that is expected now. But too, the construction wasn't just to "create and save jobs". It is a functionally well thought out infrastructure capital addition to a growing economy. Utah might not have the room to grow that Texas does, due to limits to how much of a population can be maintained. But for what she has she is putting her best foot forward, and it shows. Now, to work on some of the intense bureaucracy.
As soon as the government figures out that putting women to work is keeping them from marrying and having families, perhaps it will scale back that particular form of 'social welfare'. Yes, buildings full of women, unmarried, hired to do nothing work, is the same as foodstamps or EBT cards, boys and girls. Which might well lead to social changes where a woman will be less likely to go through college for some useless degree and figure out how to find a husband and help him get through. A few things like that begin, and a reshaping of America back to better days will occur. Dominoes, stepping stones, call them what you will. Though I suspect a number of issues will have to go forward all at once, and with some certainty about them and on into some significant future, for the family to again take shape. The family being the key and backbone to any real change, here or there, then or now. As the family goes, so goes the nation. As is, the family is in court with decidedly anti-family "judges" and laws that land them in front of the "judges", or under the gun of such. With half or less women working bureaucratic jobs, or even replaced by men? Bureaucracy will be broken. Good riddance!
I was looking for a particular restaurant, and how to get to it. I would like to take my mother here when we are staying there. I'm not sure I want to stand in a long line though. While I am in town, since it is near a bookstore I would like to visit, I am hoping to get in and try the food. While I have excellent taste in Mexican food, compared to the average, and know "home cooking" from canned, my mother is even more discriminating. If it isn't right, she will go ahead and finish her plate but she gets a "that's crap" look on her face. She was taught the way to do Mexican food without allowances for slack. She expects that from everyone else. We both love Mexican food, too. The problem is, a multicourse meal requires several sauces and production lines which makes it very difficult for one or even two people to really cook. I am hoping this place lives up to it's reputation.
While having my printer working would be nice, the truth is hand writing instructions, then drawing a little map to boot, puts the notion of where to go more positively into my brain. I have found though, that some map programs online are very bad at getting you where you want to go. Following their instructions, there are two places I have never found. I suppose I could call, but time has never been on my side. It is probably close to where the maps indicated, just not exactly there. I do what I can.
Have a good day. Time to shower and such and head out.
Ah, the fun and games continue!
.
.
I have an appointment this morning, with the doctors. I get to tell them that I am at the end, and past it really, of my capacity to take the medicine. My guess is they knew this was coming, sooner or later. Since they put the appointment a month off, I think they even knew the cutt-off point. They were hoping a month would allow me time to get situated on the medicine. Or they wanted to give the medicine time to work, knowing I would do my best. I have to cut my medicine, at least back to where it was. Despite them saying they have never heard of anyone having problems with these medicines, my guess is they have heard this from every client they have, save those who are so ill from the heart problems, and tended by someone, that the patient doesn't notice the difference.
Now, it isn't that I don't want to take care of the condition, it is merely that I cannot take care of the condition. I suppose the best I can do is take what of the medicine I can take. Since the difference between one quarter and one third of the max dose (the max is what they really want, and for example, I am not exactly sure the portions only that the logic works) is probably the difference in my capacity to take it on my own, that there is little health benefit from the upper part of that and I do better on the lower amount, which means I will probably half and half again the dose of my main medicine, over time. I suppose a bit of medicine coupled with being (more) active is better than nothing and better still than taking so much I end up missing lots of doses.
I have a good idea how they will take this. But that is that. I do need to check and see if the angiography is still planned for later this month. I have arranged lodging for the visit. Hotels either have a three star or better rating at a hundred plus a night or they get comments suggesting the plumbing doesn't work, the place is either dirty or filthy, the place seemed dangerous, and even that prostitution and drug deals are going on in the places. Urhm, a hundred and more didn't seem all that bad, all things considered. Oh, those things will still happen, they just won't be nearly so obvious. Now, the thing is, after going through an online site to order my reservations I went to look at the hotel more closely at it's own site. I wanted to see if I really saved any money (to my notions, from what I could see, I did not, by the way). In any case, the hotel itself was showing no vacancies. Odd, and most hotels were showing no vacancies throughout SLC. Is something happening mid-September that would cause hotels to be booked full? Hmm, not Thanksgiving, not Christmas, then, what? Ski season won't open for another month either. Weird. All over SLC, hotels seemed booked. I couldn't find a hotel with smoking rooms though, for my mother. I don't mind, mostly. She will, but... Not much I can do if such a thing doesn't exist.
I wish there was more to do in SLC, early. While I am sure, if you lived there and knew the place well, you might be able to find a thing or two. But for a big city it does roll up the streets and shut down the world at a rather early time. Then again, what would be open in real big cities? Bars? Great. Actually, what would I be interested in doing? Hmm, window shopping tools, chatting up a solar energy store employee (though often the salesmen know nothing), finding books on the subject. Nothing exciting but it might be something. Hmm, since I will be in town after it wakes up I might look for a bookstore or a alternative power store or resource center to visit.
Later.
.
I have an appointment this morning, with the doctors. I get to tell them that I am at the end, and past it really, of my capacity to take the medicine. My guess is they knew this was coming, sooner or later. Since they put the appointment a month off, I think they even knew the cutt-off point. They were hoping a month would allow me time to get situated on the medicine. Or they wanted to give the medicine time to work, knowing I would do my best. I have to cut my medicine, at least back to where it was. Despite them saying they have never heard of anyone having problems with these medicines, my guess is they have heard this from every client they have, save those who are so ill from the heart problems, and tended by someone, that the patient doesn't notice the difference.
Now, it isn't that I don't want to take care of the condition, it is merely that I cannot take care of the condition. I suppose the best I can do is take what of the medicine I can take. Since the difference between one quarter and one third of the max dose (the max is what they really want, and for example, I am not exactly sure the portions only that the logic works) is probably the difference in my capacity to take it on my own, that there is little health benefit from the upper part of that and I do better on the lower amount, which means I will probably half and half again the dose of my main medicine, over time. I suppose a bit of medicine coupled with being (more) active is better than nothing and better still than taking so much I end up missing lots of doses.
I have a good idea how they will take this. But that is that. I do need to check and see if the angiography is still planned for later this month. I have arranged lodging for the visit. Hotels either have a three star or better rating at a hundred plus a night or they get comments suggesting the plumbing doesn't work, the place is either dirty or filthy, the place seemed dangerous, and even that prostitution and drug deals are going on in the places. Urhm, a hundred and more didn't seem all that bad, all things considered. Oh, those things will still happen, they just won't be nearly so obvious. Now, the thing is, after going through an online site to order my reservations I went to look at the hotel more closely at it's own site. I wanted to see if I really saved any money (to my notions, from what I could see, I did not, by the way). In any case, the hotel itself was showing no vacancies. Odd, and most hotels were showing no vacancies throughout SLC. Is something happening mid-September that would cause hotels to be booked full? Hmm, not Thanksgiving, not Christmas, then, what? Ski season won't open for another month either. Weird. All over SLC, hotels seemed booked. I couldn't find a hotel with smoking rooms though, for my mother. I don't mind, mostly. She will, but... Not much I can do if such a thing doesn't exist.
I wish there was more to do in SLC, early. While I am sure, if you lived there and knew the place well, you might be able to find a thing or two. But for a big city it does roll up the streets and shut down the world at a rather early time. Then again, what would be open in real big cities? Bars? Great. Actually, what would I be interested in doing? Hmm, window shopping tools, chatting up a solar energy store employee (though often the salesmen know nothing), finding books on the subject. Nothing exciting but it might be something. Hmm, since I will be in town after it wakes up I might look for a bookstore or a alternative power store or resource center to visit.
Later.
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Bee in the bonnet.
.
.
While I can't sleep and am unfit for work, my mind has been doing things. While browsing the web I happened to be directed to a horror movie. No, that one wasn't of particular interest. But it did cause me to start thinking of movies I had seen. Just as now, as a child, I had difficulty sleeping. My mother happened to be a fan of horror, and company was better than not. So, while my brother slept, we watched old horrors. I wasn't allowed to watch the really bad ones, like Last House on the Left (which I still haven't seen, and won't).
But there was one I could only faintly remember. Something about dinosaurs, and some people running, and an insane asylum at the end. I thought it would be easy to find. Not so much. A half dozen search criteria in several search engines and YouTube came up with nothing. Looking through hosts of sites, dozens of collections of trailers, I was starting to get a headache. Finally, with a list of movies and links where I could check the name and find out more, I hit upon it. "Equinox" (1970, though the original was "The Equinox", 1967).
Oh, it is a stupid movie. The monsters are claymation, the story is probably as bad as the monsters, the acting is wretched, I had no doubts. I don't think I thought it was all that good as a child. But I did see potential. Not for anything fantastic, but for more than what was shown. And, the good thing was, it wasn't the soft-port (or even harder versions) that a lot of horror was and is, it wasn't a slasher (never cared for those). Just a tale to tell over a fire while camping I suppose. But, I did find it.
There is one more I may look for someday. In the story, a young woman and her husband meet the mother-in-law (the wife's mother). As the story goes on, it turns out the mother-in-law is a witch. And she tries to kill the husband for some reason. I think they try to escape but trickery is afoot. Finally, he finds the witch, kills her, and buries her. Then continues life with his wife until he realizes it is not his wife. He races to dig up the grave of the witch only to find it was his wife he killed and buried.
I used to like Vincent Price movies, but later on realized they were extremely melodramatic. And just as cheesy as the others. Of course, he seems to have a very 'Poe' appeal. Then again, I sort of burned out on Poe long ago too. Ah well. It is interesting to find out what movies are available to watch without paying. Some are tightly guarded. Equinox was just released as a bundle of a bunch of stupid things, for $36 or so, therefore it is not available. But to me, it never will be worth $36, or even $6 and shipping. I just wanted to know what the darned thing was called! Ack. Well, I would have watched it again, if it was free. Spending my time as the fee for nostalgia, nothing more.
I think it is about bed time. I have to get up and get going for an early appointment tomorrow, but that shouldn't be a problem. I will probably be up by midnight and I am staying up 12 to 18 hours, which will see me off, which is all I need. I can limp back if I have to. Oh, beans and ham are cooked. I suppose I should tend that. It takes hours for it to cool down enough to mess with though. Hmm, a bowl of that wouldn't be a bad thing. With some of the whole whipping cream to thicken the juice. Numm!
Good night.
.
While I can't sleep and am unfit for work, my mind has been doing things. While browsing the web I happened to be directed to a horror movie. No, that one wasn't of particular interest. But it did cause me to start thinking of movies I had seen. Just as now, as a child, I had difficulty sleeping. My mother happened to be a fan of horror, and company was better than not. So, while my brother slept, we watched old horrors. I wasn't allowed to watch the really bad ones, like Last House on the Left (which I still haven't seen, and won't).
But there was one I could only faintly remember. Something about dinosaurs, and some people running, and an insane asylum at the end. I thought it would be easy to find. Not so much. A half dozen search criteria in several search engines and YouTube came up with nothing. Looking through hosts of sites, dozens of collections of trailers, I was starting to get a headache. Finally, with a list of movies and links where I could check the name and find out more, I hit upon it. "Equinox" (1970, though the original was "The Equinox", 1967).
Oh, it is a stupid movie. The monsters are claymation, the story is probably as bad as the monsters, the acting is wretched, I had no doubts. I don't think I thought it was all that good as a child. But I did see potential. Not for anything fantastic, but for more than what was shown. And, the good thing was, it wasn't the soft-port (or even harder versions) that a lot of horror was and is, it wasn't a slasher (never cared for those). Just a tale to tell over a fire while camping I suppose. But, I did find it.
There is one more I may look for someday. In the story, a young woman and her husband meet the mother-in-law (the wife's mother). As the story goes on, it turns out the mother-in-law is a witch. And she tries to kill the husband for some reason. I think they try to escape but trickery is afoot. Finally, he finds the witch, kills her, and buries her. Then continues life with his wife until he realizes it is not his wife. He races to dig up the grave of the witch only to find it was his wife he killed and buried.
I used to like Vincent Price movies, but later on realized they were extremely melodramatic. And just as cheesy as the others. Of course, he seems to have a very 'Poe' appeal. Then again, I sort of burned out on Poe long ago too. Ah well. It is interesting to find out what movies are available to watch without paying. Some are tightly guarded. Equinox was just released as a bundle of a bunch of stupid things, for $36 or so, therefore it is not available. But to me, it never will be worth $36, or even $6 and shipping. I just wanted to know what the darned thing was called! Ack. Well, I would have watched it again, if it was free. Spending my time as the fee for nostalgia, nothing more.
I think it is about bed time. I have to get up and get going for an early appointment tomorrow, but that shouldn't be a problem. I will probably be up by midnight and I am staying up 12 to 18 hours, which will see me off, which is all I need. I can limp back if I have to. Oh, beans and ham are cooked. I suppose I should tend that. It takes hours for it to cool down enough to mess with though. Hmm, a bowl of that wouldn't be a bad thing. With some of the whole whipping cream to thicken the juice. Numm!
Good night.
Solar power, inverters, charge controllers, wiring for dc.
.
.
Yeah, okay. I'm starting to see rough outlines. I am starting to see where, money allowing, along with a little ingenuity and elbow grease, a decent system could be created easily and rather quickly. The more difficult aspects are designing the system,which will require understanding what I need/want from the system in the first place, wiring dc (and perhaps developing some of the dc to ac for a small number of ac outlets, if it is possible to have a "duel fuel" power system), and probably hooking up the tie-in to the grid (required to receive the government rebates which would make the system more feasible).
From what I am seeing, so far, the reason a tie-in system is more of a problem is because it involves a (pseudo, if they insist) government bureaucracy involvement (the power company, so regulated it might as well be the Post Office!). I am not sure how much red tape is involved, but just understand, whenever the government gets involved, expenses and complexity escalate exponentially. As well, your opsec is smashed. No, you can't trust your government, or to keep it's mouth shut. Telling the government anything is like putting neon signs every few miles on every road leading from your home for as far as our borders and beyond (or, telling a woman, which is often exactly what you are doing). Bah! Still, those neon lights dim in time. And in a grid down, they would go out.
I am looking at a couple of devices tonight, a grid-tie and battery back up inverter and a charge controller, trying to figure out what they mean. Sure, sure, they have descriptions. Oh, of course, it is easy to find more general descriptions of the general device, how it fits in, what it really does.
One indicates it is good for 3.6 kW at 48 volt and 45 amp DC charger and is vented. Okay. Is that, per hour? Is that per day? Do I need one, two, four, six? What in the world am I really dealing with? Is that average in a sunny place like Hawaii or Florida, is that average in the contiguous US, what? Can I even just have one, or must they come in pairs? Oh, sure, I have read, and read, and read, and... I am still reading. How can you know how much to plan to install if you don't even know how much you really need? I did see a bill from December last, electric, indicating I had used 1.3k kwHrs for the month. I suppose that is a start, but how does that relate to real daily usage. (Remember, I have some electric heat, which I use always in my en suite bathroom and any time I am here in the computer room and feel a chill (since I am in skivvies, even in the winter, that is usually:). I use far more electricity, I think, in the winter. But, what does that really mean?
Oh, why the 48 volts? I am thinking that the best place, for me, to install solar panels, is out back, on poles, stacked several on a pole, around the fenced periphery of my acre. I can't swear I need 100 yards (or is it feet), but I suspect I might. The trees would make them invisible from the front. I suppose I could put a couple (four, maybe eight) on the font south facing slant roof, but that roof is low enough that they would easily be seen on the road. I don't wish to advertise.
The second device is much more straight forward. Heck, it doesn't even indicate it is self-venting, or needs venting, or... something. What is missing, again, of course, is scale. Is this a singular device, how many kWhrs will it handle, and of course installation.
Well, this item makes more sense, though I still don't have a good grip on how much power over time it actually offers. It says 7,200 watts. Nice. Is that per hour of sunshine, per day, per minute, per... what? If it is per day on a sunny day, this is (according to my December power bill) about one seventh of what I use, currently. Did you happen to notice how much it cost. Of course, you still have to add solar panels, the charge controller, wiring, and either do or have the installation done. My guess is, if you buy your own parts, many companies will not then install or if they do, they would do so at a steep premium. Their junk or your work, most likely.
There is nothing altruistic about solar, or any other, alternative energy source. It's all about the green which has nothing to do with grass, trees, the planet, carbon footprints, or anything else. Only the foolish earth religionists can imagine that, fool themselves into any such damned fool notions. It's about backing away from a failing system and covering your own butt, or if you install and build, about getting as fat and happy as you can while the (economic) sun still shines. Right, Gore?
Is there a "Solar Power for Dummies", then a solid follow-up for more advanced, then maybe a manual for installation? Hmm, now I went and did it! Okay, that is what I need to look for. Books. I will go look. Reading online, mostly from people who are saying "Don't worry, buy this, it is the best evah!" isn't getting it.
Later.
ahahahahahahhaaa whoo haha Solar Power Your Home for Dummies
.
Yeah, okay. I'm starting to see rough outlines. I am starting to see where, money allowing, along with a little ingenuity and elbow grease, a decent system could be created easily and rather quickly. The more difficult aspects are designing the system,which will require understanding what I need/want from the system in the first place, wiring dc (and perhaps developing some of the dc to ac for a small number of ac outlets, if it is possible to have a "duel fuel" power system), and probably hooking up the tie-in to the grid (required to receive the government rebates which would make the system more feasible).
From what I am seeing, so far, the reason a tie-in system is more of a problem is because it involves a (pseudo, if they insist) government bureaucracy involvement (the power company, so regulated it might as well be the Post Office!). I am not sure how much red tape is involved, but just understand, whenever the government gets involved, expenses and complexity escalate exponentially. As well, your opsec is smashed. No, you can't trust your government, or to keep it's mouth shut. Telling the government anything is like putting neon signs every few miles on every road leading from your home for as far as our borders and beyond (or, telling a woman, which is often exactly what you are doing). Bah! Still, those neon lights dim in time. And in a grid down, they would go out.
I am looking at a couple of devices tonight, a grid-tie and battery back up inverter and a charge controller, trying to figure out what they mean. Sure, sure, they have descriptions. Oh, of course, it is easy to find more general descriptions of the general device, how it fits in, what it really does.
One indicates it is good for 3.6 kW at 48 volt and 45 amp DC charger and is vented. Okay. Is that, per hour? Is that per day? Do I need one, two, four, six? What in the world am I really dealing with? Is that average in a sunny place like Hawaii or Florida, is that average in the contiguous US, what? Can I even just have one, or must they come in pairs? Oh, sure, I have read, and read, and read, and... I am still reading. How can you know how much to plan to install if you don't even know how much you really need? I did see a bill from December last, electric, indicating I had used 1.3k kwHrs for the month. I suppose that is a start, but how does that relate to real daily usage. (Remember, I have some electric heat, which I use always in my en suite bathroom and any time I am here in the computer room and feel a chill (since I am in skivvies, even in the winter, that is usually:). I use far more electricity, I think, in the winter. But, what does that really mean?
Oh, why the 48 volts? I am thinking that the best place, for me, to install solar panels, is out back, on poles, stacked several on a pole, around the fenced periphery of my acre. I can't swear I need 100 yards (or is it feet), but I suspect I might. The trees would make them invisible from the front. I suppose I could put a couple (four, maybe eight) on the font south facing slant roof, but that roof is low enough that they would easily be seen on the road. I don't wish to advertise.
The second device is much more straight forward. Heck, it doesn't even indicate it is self-venting, or needs venting, or... something. What is missing, again, of course, is scale. Is this a singular device, how many kWhrs will it handle, and of course installation.
Well, this item makes more sense, though I still don't have a good grip on how much power over time it actually offers. It says 7,200 watts. Nice. Is that per hour of sunshine, per day, per minute, per... what? If it is per day on a sunny day, this is (according to my December power bill) about one seventh of what I use, currently. Did you happen to notice how much it cost. Of course, you still have to add solar panels, the charge controller, wiring, and either do or have the installation done. My guess is, if you buy your own parts, many companies will not then install or if they do, they would do so at a steep premium. Their junk or your work, most likely.
There is nothing altruistic about solar, or any other, alternative energy source. It's all about the green which has nothing to do with grass, trees, the planet, carbon footprints, or anything else. Only the foolish earth religionists can imagine that, fool themselves into any such damned fool notions. It's about backing away from a failing system and covering your own butt, or if you install and build, about getting as fat and happy as you can while the (economic) sun still shines. Right, Gore?
Is there a "Solar Power for Dummies", then a solid follow-up for more advanced, then maybe a manual for installation? Hmm, now I went and did it! Okay, that is what I need to look for. Books. I will go look. Reading online, mostly from people who are saying "Don't worry, buy this, it is the best evah!" isn't getting it.
Later.
ahahahahahahhaaa whoo haha Solar Power Your Home for Dummies
Cheesy?
.
.
I've gotta tell you, when a woman laughs at your jokes a little too much, it sure seems cheesy. Oh, fine, in a bar it's great. Everyone is fat, happy, and stupid there anyway. Which is probably why I don't go there anymore. Something akin to the Camelot in Monty Python movies? Yeah, probably.
Anyway, I have always found women who laugh at everything you say as silly. I used to think it was due to drink. But when it happens at a grocery store? Oh, she was pretty enough. Couldn't have been much more than 23 or 24 either. What was she doing laughing at my jokes? I tested by tossing out a couple that were blatantly foolish. Nope, she still chuckled. Maybe I am being too harsh? Is this a natural reaction to a guy they like, hate, fear, see as authoritative, or... something?
Anyway, I did get some groceries bought. On the downside, I am out of freezer space. I went with pot pies, as a filler food. I even bought a dinky apple and cherry pie, just to sample. Curiosity got the best of me. Of course I bought some nice salami cuts, various cheeses, sour cream and whipping cream, and ricotta cheese. I have never tried ricotta, though I am guessing it is similar to a pseudo-pureed cottage cheese? I have had it in lasagna, just never by itself. I want to try it in the beans and ham, maybe with the cold cuts and cheese too. Just to get familiar with it.
Oh, I did buy a little more than the recommended amount of bleach for storage. It is the first item officially ready to go and put in my downstairs pantry. I need to get a permanent marker, or find mine and see if it (or they) still work, to put dates on things. My goal is to replace many things in a year, including bleach but minus long term food storage items. I'll just look through stuff occasionally, and if it is a year old, put it on a grocery list, buy it, and trade places with the "old" long term storage item. I would like to add foods into a rotation, say keeping some flower and some wheat berries on hand, but turnover isn't quite as time sensitive (other than opened containers, which is why I think #10 cans are best for me, at this time).
If you want to become a chef, to be honest, don't go to chef school (first). Go out and eat everything you can get you hands on, of various "qualities", in various forms, mixed, matched, cooked, raw, and in between. Sample what spices do, mix and match, and create flavor profiles of your own. And don't stop with what you like. Try to learn how to create flavors other people like, maybe especially if you don't like the taste. Just so you know what is right and wrong about a particular dish and can tell if it is "right", even thought you despise the profile. No, I will never be a chef. But I would like to be as close to a home chef as is possible. My lady friend often liked things I despised, to her I owe a great debt (if I didn't, at first, understand or appreciate). I learned to make things she adored and I hated as well as learning to make things we both liked. Almost all my dishes were hand made, start to stop, too. But I also learned that, to be a real chef, you need to shop pretty much daily, you need a prep chef (or two), and someone to wash and keep on top of that, and you need some cooking devices that are outside of the financial capacity of two middle incomes unless both were extremist foodies. Think blast chiller, salamander, and the rest. Well, and a home which has been refitted to handle the heat and energy requirements of that equipment, and given the space for easy access and use of several of those at a time. *laughs* Hey, I thought about trying to figure it out at one time.
I am not sure I will get to much tonight. I would love to, but there is nothing left to give. Who knows though, as time passes, perhaps something will trigger something which will start the ball rolling. Once it gets rolling, it works. Until then, well, you have here what I have had for the weeks before yesterday. If nothing else, the big picture ball is on the move. I am getting closer to having things done. I am well ahead of where I was yesterday.
Later or good night.
.
I've gotta tell you, when a woman laughs at your jokes a little too much, it sure seems cheesy. Oh, fine, in a bar it's great. Everyone is fat, happy, and stupid there anyway. Which is probably why I don't go there anymore. Something akin to the Camelot in Monty Python movies? Yeah, probably.
Anyway, I have always found women who laugh at everything you say as silly. I used to think it was due to drink. But when it happens at a grocery store? Oh, she was pretty enough. Couldn't have been much more than 23 or 24 either. What was she doing laughing at my jokes? I tested by tossing out a couple that were blatantly foolish. Nope, she still chuckled. Maybe I am being too harsh? Is this a natural reaction to a guy they like, hate, fear, see as authoritative, or... something?
Anyway, I did get some groceries bought. On the downside, I am out of freezer space. I went with pot pies, as a filler food. I even bought a dinky apple and cherry pie, just to sample. Curiosity got the best of me. Of course I bought some nice salami cuts, various cheeses, sour cream and whipping cream, and ricotta cheese. I have never tried ricotta, though I am guessing it is similar to a pseudo-pureed cottage cheese? I have had it in lasagna, just never by itself. I want to try it in the beans and ham, maybe with the cold cuts and cheese too. Just to get familiar with it.
Oh, I did buy a little more than the recommended amount of bleach for storage. It is the first item officially ready to go and put in my downstairs pantry. I need to get a permanent marker, or find mine and see if it (or they) still work, to put dates on things. My goal is to replace many things in a year, including bleach but minus long term food storage items. I'll just look through stuff occasionally, and if it is a year old, put it on a grocery list, buy it, and trade places with the "old" long term storage item. I would like to add foods into a rotation, say keeping some flower and some wheat berries on hand, but turnover isn't quite as time sensitive (other than opened containers, which is why I think #10 cans are best for me, at this time).
If you want to become a chef, to be honest, don't go to chef school (first). Go out and eat everything you can get you hands on, of various "qualities", in various forms, mixed, matched, cooked, raw, and in between. Sample what spices do, mix and match, and create flavor profiles of your own. And don't stop with what you like. Try to learn how to create flavors other people like, maybe especially if you don't like the taste. Just so you know what is right and wrong about a particular dish and can tell if it is "right", even thought you despise the profile. No, I will never be a chef. But I would like to be as close to a home chef as is possible. My lady friend often liked things I despised, to her I owe a great debt (if I didn't, at first, understand or appreciate). I learned to make things she adored and I hated as well as learning to make things we both liked. Almost all my dishes were hand made, start to stop, too. But I also learned that, to be a real chef, you need to shop pretty much daily, you need a prep chef (or two), and someone to wash and keep on top of that, and you need some cooking devices that are outside of the financial capacity of two middle incomes unless both were extremist foodies. Think blast chiller, salamander, and the rest. Well, and a home which has been refitted to handle the heat and energy requirements of that equipment, and given the space for easy access and use of several of those at a time. *laughs* Hey, I thought about trying to figure it out at one time.
I am not sure I will get to much tonight. I would love to, but there is nothing left to give. Who knows though, as time passes, perhaps something will trigger something which will start the ball rolling. Once it gets rolling, it works. Until then, well, you have here what I have had for the weeks before yesterday. If nothing else, the big picture ball is on the move. I am getting closer to having things done. I am well ahead of where I was yesterday.
Later or good night.
Twitching but awake.
.
.
Yeah, it has been a tough couple of days. Sleep is difficult, adding in a doorbell and it was murder. I am not sure what I can do, but having started with tasks, even though I don't feel like continuing, seeing the carrot of partially completed tasks drives me on. Little areas looking better today than for days or weeks, jobs in themselves half or more completed, and little things I have been wanting to complete which haven't be touched in a bit are everywhere. I need some time to get my bean wrapped around life but there seems to be no time like the present. Food would help but none is just sitting there, ready to be consumed. So, perhaps a shower, a trip to town to grab a bit, eating a bite, recovering from that, then on to work. It is the plan, whatever really happens.
I have loaded two pounds of beans into the soaking pot. I have a ham thawed for when it is time. A little bit of sour cream, or whole whipping cream, might be good. I know I have no whipping cream so I best check on sour cream before I head to town. That adds a richness when the beans and ham become a little stale from eating it a bit too often over a short time. The ham and beans should give me a good week of plentiful eating, maybe two. A loaf of good bread or rolls would add to that greatly. This time I ought to freeze about half of my production, but that ends up being a lot of work I am not sure I can do. Splitting off and cutting up the ham, portioning out bits ham to the various containers, all of it going into a half dozen containers or back into the cookpot, then being allowed to cool enough to freeze. It's a goal.
Well, on to... waking up. Good "day".
.
Yeah, it has been a tough couple of days. Sleep is difficult, adding in a doorbell and it was murder. I am not sure what I can do, but having started with tasks, even though I don't feel like continuing, seeing the carrot of partially completed tasks drives me on. Little areas looking better today than for days or weeks, jobs in themselves half or more completed, and little things I have been wanting to complete which haven't be touched in a bit are everywhere. I need some time to get my bean wrapped around life but there seems to be no time like the present. Food would help but none is just sitting there, ready to be consumed. So, perhaps a shower, a trip to town to grab a bit, eating a bite, recovering from that, then on to work. It is the plan, whatever really happens.
I have loaded two pounds of beans into the soaking pot. I have a ham thawed for when it is time. A little bit of sour cream, or whole whipping cream, might be good. I know I have no whipping cream so I best check on sour cream before I head to town. That adds a richness when the beans and ham become a little stale from eating it a bit too often over a short time. The ham and beans should give me a good week of plentiful eating, maybe two. A loaf of good bread or rolls would add to that greatly. This time I ought to freeze about half of my production, but that ends up being a lot of work I am not sure I can do. Splitting off and cutting up the ham, portioning out bits ham to the various containers, all of it going into a half dozen containers or back into the cookpot, then being allowed to cool enough to freeze. It's a goal.
Well, on to... waking up. Good "day".
Monday, September 5, 2011
Gotta try for more sleep.
.
.
*zzz...* Huh? Oh, right.
Waking up hurt. The news of possible water access rung a very tired bell, beside the irritation of the doorbell. I had to dig and then begin trying to come down. *zzz*
Later.
.
*zzz...* Huh? Oh, right.
Waking up hurt. The news of possible water access rung a very tired bell, beside the irritation of the doorbell. I had to dig and then begin trying to come down. *zzz*
Later.
Another door bell ring.
.
.
This time it came a few hours after I had laid down to sleep. And I really needed sleep. I am surprised I heard it. I was wearing the CPAP (for the first time), which might have been new enough to keep me from deeper sleep. I wondered if I had missed something or if a neighbor needed something. I had forgotten to call my neighbor again. Odd, but the neighbor called right after the doorbell incident. It seems the Mr. got my message and was calling back? I spoke of that for a bit, he said he will look into it, then he had news.
He said his mother works for the county water board. It seems I DO have water shares or rights, two water shares. The last owners hadn't even known, somehow. The water was in the name of the original owners (only three different owners (the first owners passed it down through the family from 1880 until 2003 or so)). If so, their shares go back a long way, which is quite good in a state where the date of the claim is counted as your position in line for water in scarce years (rights though, not shares, as I have found out after researching). It is irrigation water, from what I am told. I think I was told more because I haven't been watering my lawn than anything else? That was mentioned. *grins* Never... mind. He suggested what an upwelling (or something like that, where the water comes out) might look like. As soon as I can get my act together, I will begin looking for it. Two shares. I'm not quite sure exactly what that means, though it should be plenty for a little more than an acre.
After a bit of checking, I will learn more. Okay, here it is. Both water rights and shares exist, and they are quite different. Both of them seem to have limits on non-use, where access may be canceled after so many years (5). If it is water rights, it would be a set amount of water. But if it is a water share, that is dependent on a board's ruling here in Utah that sets "water bounties" based on what is considered necessary for production locally, by county, per acre, though some counties might have more than one area if the conditions are different enough I suppose.
I am terribly surprised the last owners didn't know. I am quite sure they would have utilized that water. They did a lot of work. And, though I am not positive, it seems that even irrigation water can be used for livestock? Oops, irrigation water is seasonally available. Oh, but there is some other classification, agricultural water, which can be used for both livestock and irrigation. Ugh, this is getting confusing. I honestly can't understand why that wouldn't have been a part of the contracted deed of sale, or whatever? Perhaps the one who sold the place was a widow and she simply didn't know these things?
In any case, if I can renew that, and get it into my name, I probably will, cost dependent. If it is too much I simply won't be able to move on it. I only have just so much financial wiggle room right at this moment. But you know I would love to have some water availability, even if just for the lawn. A timer or two and hoses, I suppose.
.
This time it came a few hours after I had laid down to sleep. And I really needed sleep. I am surprised I heard it. I was wearing the CPAP (for the first time), which might have been new enough to keep me from deeper sleep. I wondered if I had missed something or if a neighbor needed something. I had forgotten to call my neighbor again. Odd, but the neighbor called right after the doorbell incident. It seems the Mr. got my message and was calling back? I spoke of that for a bit, he said he will look into it, then he had news.
He said his mother works for the county water board. It seems I DO have water shares or rights, two water shares. The last owners hadn't even known, somehow. The water was in the name of the original owners (only three different owners (the first owners passed it down through the family from 1880 until 2003 or so)). If so, their shares go back a long way, which is quite good in a state where the date of the claim is counted as your position in line for water in scarce years (rights though, not shares, as I have found out after researching). It is irrigation water, from what I am told. I think I was told more because I haven't been watering my lawn than anything else? That was mentioned. *grins* Never... mind. He suggested what an upwelling (or something like that, where the water comes out) might look like. As soon as I can get my act together, I will begin looking for it. Two shares. I'm not quite sure exactly what that means, though it should be plenty for a little more than an acre.
After a bit of checking, I will learn more. Okay, here it is. Both water rights and shares exist, and they are quite different. Both of them seem to have limits on non-use, where access may be canceled after so many years (5). If it is water rights, it would be a set amount of water. But if it is a water share, that is dependent on a board's ruling here in Utah that sets "water bounties" based on what is considered necessary for production locally, by county, per acre, though some counties might have more than one area if the conditions are different enough I suppose.
I am terribly surprised the last owners didn't know. I am quite sure they would have utilized that water. They did a lot of work. And, though I am not positive, it seems that even irrigation water can be used for livestock? Oops, irrigation water is seasonally available. Oh, but there is some other classification, agricultural water, which can be used for both livestock and irrigation. Ugh, this is getting confusing. I honestly can't understand why that wouldn't have been a part of the contracted deed of sale, or whatever? Perhaps the one who sold the place was a widow and she simply didn't know these things?
In any case, if I can renew that, and get it into my name, I probably will, cost dependent. If it is too much I simply won't be able to move on it. I only have just so much financial wiggle room right at this moment. But you know I would love to have some water availability, even if just for the lawn. A timer or two and hoses, I suppose.
Running out of steam.
.
.
I have done what I could. Two loads of dishes, two loads of laundry, a bit of cleaning, picking up, and organizing here and there. I want to fold the last of the laundry and what is in the dryer, put the wash into the dryer and let it go on 'fluff', make my bed, and then crash as hard as I can. If nothing else, I am pleased to have gotten the work that I did do finished. I have some hope that this isn't the last of my work cycle. I would like to have the computer room, laundry, dishes, kitchen, and my bedroom ready for inspection from the mother general. Next week would be an easy week if so.
I need to do a bit of shopping to see me through. I do need good food when I want to work. I had grilled chicken the other day, a bunch of it. And that did help probably get me to the point of working. In these times, with the medicine beating me up, knowing to eat is one thing, figuring out how to buy, getting enough going to cook, even remember to eat, and figuring that all out in a short enough time that the food doesn't spoil, is actually one heck of a trick. It's almost an accident. Still, it's part of my game plan.
Well, I best get to things. My back is starting to ache and not recovering well anymore. Just a few more things and I can sleep with a (more than usual) tired body and a rested mind (rested from having begun the work, done the work that I have).
Good night.
.
I have done what I could. Two loads of dishes, two loads of laundry, a bit of cleaning, picking up, and organizing here and there. I want to fold the last of the laundry and what is in the dryer, put the wash into the dryer and let it go on 'fluff', make my bed, and then crash as hard as I can. If nothing else, I am pleased to have gotten the work that I did do finished. I have some hope that this isn't the last of my work cycle. I would like to have the computer room, laundry, dishes, kitchen, and my bedroom ready for inspection from the mother general. Next week would be an easy week if so.
I need to do a bit of shopping to see me through. I do need good food when I want to work. I had grilled chicken the other day, a bunch of it. And that did help probably get me to the point of working. In these times, with the medicine beating me up, knowing to eat is one thing, figuring out how to buy, getting enough going to cook, even remember to eat, and figuring that all out in a short enough time that the food doesn't spoil, is actually one heck of a trick. It's almost an accident. Still, it's part of my game plan.
Well, I best get to things. My back is starting to ache and not recovering well anymore. Just a few more things and I can sleep with a (more than usual) tired body and a rested mind (rested from having begun the work, done the work that I have).
Good night.
Moving forward.
.
.
A load of laundry is just about dry now, one of the loads of dishes has been washed dried and put away, the computer room has been touched up, and during my break I have booked a hotel room for the angiography and read something I promised to read. While it is far from stellar, my plans for tonight are indeed moving forward. I need to eat though. Hmm, eggs, toast, bacon, and milk? Yeah, I suppose that might work. But after one more load of laundry and dishes have been completely done, so I have a kitchen sink available and another bit of work checked off. I hate cooking without having a sink right there, open, free, and usable in all ways. And food is a good carrot to get other things done.
Before I booked a room I checked my accounts. Not great but not bad either. If I only spend on groceries and travel as needed, plus a couple nice meals with my mom, I should be able to do well enough. Nothing fancy, mind you. And, if I keep it frugal by watching my nickels, I do believe I might be able to get the sweeteners this month if things look good at the end of the month and push ahead and buy a good deal of the rest next month. Wheat will be the one thing I will definitely be holding off buying until November. The stuff I want is a bit more expensive. Why buy it? Because I am not willing to hope that I am buying fresh good grain, that is not several years old, for all I know, and of questionable sources. Right now a store will sell you your own foot if they think you won't notice. But I think I can buy the rest of the food stores for a year next month.
Oh, I had meant to do it but forgot, I did fix that. I had suggested saving an extra hundred each month, for, say, eight to ten months, and then buying a mbr, namely the M1A. So, since pay day just passed, I put $100 into savings then set up an automatic transfer. I already have a transfer going but I couldn't find a way to amend that one. I actually have it set up to pull for the next three years or so, same as the other. Which is fine, I would actually, eventually, time allowing, like to dump 20% of my income into a 'possibilities' account. But that will be... a while. Even though I may end up using much of my savings (except at least that $100 for the rifle), if need be, to buy the long term and three-month supply. I want to get that kick started hard, and figure out rotation, and eventually rotation of even some of the long term foods (grains for cereal, bread, whatnot, and of course the beans and rice). I will sleep a hell-a-lot better knowing I have food for a year and stored properly, and three months of easement food (intermediary food, between all by hand and the ease of life today). Then I can move on to a grain mill, electricity needs, the possibility of propane installation and then appliances and perhaps a propane generator. Oh, and somewhere in there a chronograph. And, well, everything else. Ugh!
So much, so big, but it is going forward. It does take time. It takes money, and managing money. It takes effort. I have been, while in zombieland, prepping if somewhat in a sideways fashion (wool socks, new clothes (of utility), skivvies I have wanted and needed due to their particular utility, tools, and such). These things are good, but I was missing the boat. I should have been buying food. I am so distractable, worse when illness or medicine flare up. Then again getting out was not easy, sometimes it wasn't possible. Whether I seemed to want or need to get out it just didn't happen, often. If I can get the foods in order however, I will be pleased with those other things. I have never had a pair of cotton socks last me more than a year or two, I have wool socks from back when I was playing with the hippie chick(en). Ha! That is seven or eight years of wear, or more, and I wear them daily. Well, when I do wear anything, which is usually save summer when I don't have to leave my home.
By the way, it is seriously cooling off. While it seems warm enough during the day, and it is in the 70's and 80's, my house is staying at 72 (with the windows closed) which, after the 90's and 100's seems downright cold. I'll... have to adjust. Hopefully before the real cold hits. Uhrm, right, back to it.
.
A load of laundry is just about dry now, one of the loads of dishes has been washed dried and put away, the computer room has been touched up, and during my break I have booked a hotel room for the angiography and read something I promised to read. While it is far from stellar, my plans for tonight are indeed moving forward. I need to eat though. Hmm, eggs, toast, bacon, and milk? Yeah, I suppose that might work. But after one more load of laundry and dishes have been completely done, so I have a kitchen sink available and another bit of work checked off. I hate cooking without having a sink right there, open, free, and usable in all ways. And food is a good carrot to get other things done.
Before I booked a room I checked my accounts. Not great but not bad either. If I only spend on groceries and travel as needed, plus a couple nice meals with my mom, I should be able to do well enough. Nothing fancy, mind you. And, if I keep it frugal by watching my nickels, I do believe I might be able to get the sweeteners this month if things look good at the end of the month and push ahead and buy a good deal of the rest next month. Wheat will be the one thing I will definitely be holding off buying until November. The stuff I want is a bit more expensive. Why buy it? Because I am not willing to hope that I am buying fresh good grain, that is not several years old, for all I know, and of questionable sources. Right now a store will sell you your own foot if they think you won't notice. But I think I can buy the rest of the food stores for a year next month.
Oh, I had meant to do it but forgot, I did fix that. I had suggested saving an extra hundred each month, for, say, eight to ten months, and then buying a mbr, namely the M1A. So, since pay day just passed, I put $100 into savings then set up an automatic transfer. I already have a transfer going but I couldn't find a way to amend that one. I actually have it set up to pull for the next three years or so, same as the other. Which is fine, I would actually, eventually, time allowing, like to dump 20% of my income into a 'possibilities' account. But that will be... a while. Even though I may end up using much of my savings (except at least that $100 for the rifle), if need be, to buy the long term and three-month supply. I want to get that kick started hard, and figure out rotation, and eventually rotation of even some of the long term foods (grains for cereal, bread, whatnot, and of course the beans and rice). I will sleep a hell-a-lot better knowing I have food for a year and stored properly, and three months of easement food (intermediary food, between all by hand and the ease of life today). Then I can move on to a grain mill, electricity needs, the possibility of propane installation and then appliances and perhaps a propane generator. Oh, and somewhere in there a chronograph. And, well, everything else. Ugh!
So much, so big, but it is going forward. It does take time. It takes money, and managing money. It takes effort. I have been, while in zombieland, prepping if somewhat in a sideways fashion (wool socks, new clothes (of utility), skivvies I have wanted and needed due to their particular utility, tools, and such). These things are good, but I was missing the boat. I should have been buying food. I am so distractable, worse when illness or medicine flare up. Then again getting out was not easy, sometimes it wasn't possible. Whether I seemed to want or need to get out it just didn't happen, often. If I can get the foods in order however, I will be pleased with those other things. I have never had a pair of cotton socks last me more than a year or two, I have wool socks from back when I was playing with the hippie chick(en). Ha! That is seven or eight years of wear, or more, and I wear them daily. Well, when I do wear anything, which is usually save summer when I don't have to leave my home.
By the way, it is seriously cooling off. While it seems warm enough during the day, and it is in the 70's and 80's, my house is staying at 72 (with the windows closed) which, after the 90's and 100's seems downright cold. I'll... have to adjust. Hopefully before the real cold hits. Uhrm, right, back to it.
Not going to waste what I have.
.
.
No more, or at least not tonight! I have been sitting and moaning recently. Sure, research is ongoing, including long term food storage. I think I might be able to get more of that more quickly than what I had thought. While I haven't checked out my money to see if I can buy sweeteners this month, I have that list. My guess, with two nights of motel and food costs in SLC surrounding the angiography, it would probably be wise to skip that this month. But, other than looking and thinking, nothing physical has been happening. As I said, not tonight.
I... sort of just stumbled into it. Angry to have been tricked, in a way, by my medicine, and while walking through the kitchen and seeing the dishes stacked up, I decided to put my hands to them. I drained what needed to be drained, filled one basin with hot sudsy water, washed off the counter space I will need and then some, put two more basins of dishes to soak, and... decided that wasn't near enough. I think it sort of followed like this. I then went to get my dirty laundry. I was fearing I had a bunch in the wash room but that didn't confront me none. It all has to be done. So, I entered my bedroom and picked up every last stitch of easily collectible dirty garment I could find, putting it all into a heaping basket.
But then I looked at my bed. It was still out in the middle, due to having had it tilted with 2x4's when edema was at it's worst. Though no longer on the wood, the wood was still there and there was little room to get into bed, which means my night stand isn't in place, so the CPAP machine has not been used. (Yeah, it gets complicated in my stupid little world, or at least I have to think of everything before doing anything so often things get sidelined. *nevermind*) The point is, I removed the wood from under the bed, put the bed back on the sliders to move it more easily, then pushed it back in place, found the nightstand and put it where it will help, then found the CPAP and put it in place on the nightstand. Okies. I then stripped the bed and will wash everything again, putting on clean bedding shortly.
Happy with that, I picked up the laundry (though I still need to grab the towels and hand towel from the bathroom(s)) and took it into the laundry room, fearing I was going to have to add it to two other baskets of clothes. Hmm, it seems I have already done those! So, I sorted what I had, then put a load in. I'm still not perfectly clear about sorting, I just do the best from the memories of having watched women do this. The cats are outside or they would have thought popo had gone mad again.
Which they no longer really fear, but it does get them going. Popo might storm and shout and get uptight, but the worst he does is make noise, they have found. But they do almost pay some attention and quit whatever they were doing, mostly, for a while. But the truth is, there is no fear. It is more like a game. Exemplified by exhibit A, as follows.
I had to stop, my back started killing me again. But as I finish writing this, it is already completely better. Just a little stoppage from time to time will do. Then I will finish cleaning this, the computer room. Sorting paperwork, picking up fully, then sweeping and mopping. I will have this room good to go, those three basins of dishes done and whatever is left after that set to soak, my bed set back up, the laundry done by morning, and use my CPAP for the first time the next time I crawl into bed. Yeah, I do think I will. Wish me luck... while you snooze? I may need it, and I'll just take it since I know you are good for it.
Sleep well.
.
No more, or at least not tonight! I have been sitting and moaning recently. Sure, research is ongoing, including long term food storage. I think I might be able to get more of that more quickly than what I had thought. While I haven't checked out my money to see if I can buy sweeteners this month, I have that list. My guess, with two nights of motel and food costs in SLC surrounding the angiography, it would probably be wise to skip that this month. But, other than looking and thinking, nothing physical has been happening. As I said, not tonight.
I... sort of just stumbled into it. Angry to have been tricked, in a way, by my medicine, and while walking through the kitchen and seeing the dishes stacked up, I decided to put my hands to them. I drained what needed to be drained, filled one basin with hot sudsy water, washed off the counter space I will need and then some, put two more basins of dishes to soak, and... decided that wasn't near enough. I think it sort of followed like this. I then went to get my dirty laundry. I was fearing I had a bunch in the wash room but that didn't confront me none. It all has to be done. So, I entered my bedroom and picked up every last stitch of easily collectible dirty garment I could find, putting it all into a heaping basket.
But then I looked at my bed. It was still out in the middle, due to having had it tilted with 2x4's when edema was at it's worst. Though no longer on the wood, the wood was still there and there was little room to get into bed, which means my night stand isn't in place, so the CPAP machine has not been used. (Yeah, it gets complicated in my stupid little world, or at least I have to think of everything before doing anything so often things get sidelined. *nevermind*) The point is, I removed the wood from under the bed, put the bed back on the sliders to move it more easily, then pushed it back in place, found the nightstand and put it where it will help, then found the CPAP and put it in place on the nightstand. Okies. I then stripped the bed and will wash everything again, putting on clean bedding shortly.
Happy with that, I picked up the laundry (though I still need to grab the towels and hand towel from the bathroom(s)) and took it into the laundry room, fearing I was going to have to add it to two other baskets of clothes. Hmm, it seems I have already done those! So, I sorted what I had, then put a load in. I'm still not perfectly clear about sorting, I just do the best from the memories of having watched women do this. The cats are outside or they would have thought popo had gone mad again.
Which they no longer really fear, but it does get them going. Popo might storm and shout and get uptight, but the worst he does is make noise, they have found. But they do almost pay some attention and quit whatever they were doing, mostly, for a while. But the truth is, there is no fear. It is more like a game. Exemplified by exhibit A, as follows.
I had to stop, my back started killing me again. But as I finish writing this, it is already completely better. Just a little stoppage from time to time will do. Then I will finish cleaning this, the computer room. Sorting paperwork, picking up fully, then sweeping and mopping. I will have this room good to go, those three basins of dishes done and whatever is left after that set to soak, my bed set back up, the laundry done by morning, and use my CPAP for the first time the next time I crawl into bed. Yeah, I do think I will. Wish me luck... while you snooze? I may need it, and I'll just take it since I know you are good for it.
Sleep well.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
One more thing tended.
.
.
A little bit of looking around and I found what will help me figure out power usage. The thing that sticks in my craw is that many things get great reviews, but if you look at the bad reviews you find all kinds of ugly. And, yes, looking at only the good is foolish. That is what an optimist does. He sees a majority of favorable reviews and ignores the rest, then whines ceaselessly when failure occurs until he finds another product with (mostly) good reviews. Something about doing the same thing over and over and insanity? Anyway, I figure if I order one of these, and get right on using it, I have 30 days with an actual guarantee for the cheaper one.
Before I can figure out my solar electric system, I have to have a clear idea about how much electricity I currently use. I can't plan for having appliances that use propane, or a wood burning stove, or anything else until I have those in hand. And, I may have to go with a system that won't cover all of my current usage and hope there is time to scale back in time. But I need to have a solid scale so that I neither overspend nor short myself "unexpectedly".
Something else that has to be noted is that, in the shortest of the winter months, we only get 1.9 hours of sun here. And, that is when it is not overcast (though perhaps that is the average including cloudy days?). We have another several months in the 2 hour and change range. While it is sunnier here than in Iowa, from what I have seen (which means little, in truth, as empirical data from a few years is void), that really impacts my best hopes for the system. And while a wind/solar system might sound good, this area is particularly windless coming in at the lowest wind production capacity rating available, making the much higher costs unreasonable for several reasons. So either I upgrade the system to provide something during those times, plan to cut back hugely in the winter the time when electricity is very important for at least lighting but also due to not being able to get out of the home as often or for as long, or a bit of both while figuring out how to change some the parameters by adding propane or other gas appliances.
This is not an easy trick. But I don't want to do what I have read others have done by building a system with high hopes only to be crushed by the reality on the ground. The truth hurts, but more so if you don't ever seek the truth in the first place. What was it? Ah. "How terrible is wisdom when it brings no profit to the wise." Too late is simply just that, too late. You can always upgrade, unless you have used every resource at your disposal. Those panels need space, lots of it for a decent sized system, and they are expensive. Adding in the best would reduce space at a cost, and vice versa. A balance has to be obtained that works for your pocket and your land. This might be the more painful of directions, slowing all progress. But the pain is felt going in, not in the living. A few months of serious planning, sweating the details, covering for losses and problems, designing for needs and some wants, adding some padding for when even the worst case scenario ends up not being the worst, and knowing what must be cut from current usage versus living in the squalor of failed dreams. Just... that is all. Again.
You know, one of the things most people don't take into account is huge. If the economy collapses you will be spending a much larger amount of time in your home. For me, I see this amazingly easily since I am often stuck in my home. As a fact, my home has become more of an extension of my body than a place to dwell. Being desperately exhausted all of the time must be something like having diarrhea to a degree. Most of you have had that. With both of those, you have serious limits on how far and long you can leave a 'safe place'. If you have diarrhea for an extended period of time, you will more and more simply choose to stay home. It is the same with exhaustion. The world is unkind to the weak and ill. And, being in your home, you will use far more resources. When doing activities become dangerous because there are no medicines or doctors, you will cut your activities to only what is necessary. No more hikes to see the top of the world, no more hanggliding, no more wind surfing, no more camping unless to live in a cooler climate for a bit but it won't be the same. You will work and sleep. And you will not work eight hour days, the work will be far too hard.
I know they say farmers used to work from sun up to sun down, but I think you miss that the woman and young children were always at home. And that work was at a very slow pace, save planting and harvest times. Further, the man was always home for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Don't be fooled into thinking, depending on where you live, that you will be working long hours in 100 F plus or even 20 F minus weather. It won't happen. Your will is not stronger than your body and your body isn't so strong as you would like to imagine. You will be homebound and sucking juice or burning wood or using water constantly, like nothing you have ever known. Just... some more thoughts. Most people do not realize that most of their life expenses are subsidized by their employer. Oh? Oh yeah. Now... that is all.
.
A little bit of looking around and I found what will help me figure out power usage. The thing that sticks in my craw is that many things get great reviews, but if you look at the bad reviews you find all kinds of ugly. And, yes, looking at only the good is foolish. That is what an optimist does. He sees a majority of favorable reviews and ignores the rest, then whines ceaselessly when failure occurs until he finds another product with (mostly) good reviews. Something about doing the same thing over and over and insanity? Anyway, I figure if I order one of these, and get right on using it, I have 30 days with an actual guarantee for the cheaper one.
Before I can figure out my solar electric system, I have to have a clear idea about how much electricity I currently use. I can't plan for having appliances that use propane, or a wood burning stove, or anything else until I have those in hand. And, I may have to go with a system that won't cover all of my current usage and hope there is time to scale back in time. But I need to have a solid scale so that I neither overspend nor short myself "unexpectedly".
Something else that has to be noted is that, in the shortest of the winter months, we only get 1.9 hours of sun here. And, that is when it is not overcast (though perhaps that is the average including cloudy days?). We have another several months in the 2 hour and change range. While it is sunnier here than in Iowa, from what I have seen (which means little, in truth, as empirical data from a few years is void), that really impacts my best hopes for the system. And while a wind/solar system might sound good, this area is particularly windless coming in at the lowest wind production capacity rating available, making the much higher costs unreasonable for several reasons. So either I upgrade the system to provide something during those times, plan to cut back hugely in the winter the time when electricity is very important for at least lighting but also due to not being able to get out of the home as often or for as long, or a bit of both while figuring out how to change some the parameters by adding propane or other gas appliances.
This is not an easy trick. But I don't want to do what I have read others have done by building a system with high hopes only to be crushed by the reality on the ground. The truth hurts, but more so if you don't ever seek the truth in the first place. What was it? Ah. "How terrible is wisdom when it brings no profit to the wise." Too late is simply just that, too late. You can always upgrade, unless you have used every resource at your disposal. Those panels need space, lots of it for a decent sized system, and they are expensive. Adding in the best would reduce space at a cost, and vice versa. A balance has to be obtained that works for your pocket and your land. This might be the more painful of directions, slowing all progress. But the pain is felt going in, not in the living. A few months of serious planning, sweating the details, covering for losses and problems, designing for needs and some wants, adding some padding for when even the worst case scenario ends up not being the worst, and knowing what must be cut from current usage versus living in the squalor of failed dreams. Just... that is all. Again.
You know, one of the things most people don't take into account is huge. If the economy collapses you will be spending a much larger amount of time in your home. For me, I see this amazingly easily since I am often stuck in my home. As a fact, my home has become more of an extension of my body than a place to dwell. Being desperately exhausted all of the time must be something like having diarrhea to a degree. Most of you have had that. With both of those, you have serious limits on how far and long you can leave a 'safe place'. If you have diarrhea for an extended period of time, you will more and more simply choose to stay home. It is the same with exhaustion. The world is unkind to the weak and ill. And, being in your home, you will use far more resources. When doing activities become dangerous because there are no medicines or doctors, you will cut your activities to only what is necessary. No more hikes to see the top of the world, no more hanggliding, no more wind surfing, no more camping unless to live in a cooler climate for a bit but it won't be the same. You will work and sleep. And you will not work eight hour days, the work will be far too hard.
I know they say farmers used to work from sun up to sun down, but I think you miss that the woman and young children were always at home. And that work was at a very slow pace, save planting and harvest times. Further, the man was always home for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Don't be fooled into thinking, depending on where you live, that you will be working long hours in 100 F plus or even 20 F minus weather. It won't happen. Your will is not stronger than your body and your body isn't so strong as you would like to imagine. You will be homebound and sucking juice or burning wood or using water constantly, like nothing you have ever known. Just... some more thoughts. Most people do not realize that most of their life expenses are subsidized by their employer. Oh? Oh yeah. Now... that is all.
Ugh.
.
.
I could not sleep so I tried to stay up, to take my friend out. Hmm, missed confession, church, I wanted to at least try for this. Nope. I completely ran out of steam. Yeah, it has to be the medicine this time around. How can you take full dose medicine when you can't take full dose medicine? That is easy, you don't. I will continue to do my best to take it until my next appointment. But I am shot. Little will happen in life until I start lowering the dosages is my guess. I will try but I realize I am back to zombieland. At least they honestly did do the increases slowly enough that I didn't actually 'black out'. Sure, it crept up on me, but I have been, for the most part, able to take the medicine up to this point. At this point though, that is almost the sum total of what I can do. I didn't lose a month, fall off medicine mostly, only to 'wake up' one day and feel guilty about... not taking my medicine. Back to those initial levels, it's as good as I can do, or want to do. Then again, even trying to just take it back to the last dosage level might be enough.
My appointment is coming up rather quickly. My mission, should I accept it (and I do), is to get there, somehow, by hook, crook, claw, or nail. It will be difficult. I can barely sit in this chair and type. Zombieland indeed. I wonder if all medicine does this? Every type, whether they were treating some false diagnosis or this real one, when it gets up to or even close to dose, does this. Do they have anything that doesn't cause a complete failure in my function? Is that their goal? I really don't know. I know only that nothing can help me if I can't take it. They might as well just quit and go home. That is what I will be doing after I inform them, mostly.
I did see a cool little home, again. I have written about these before. I never did find material costs and such until this time, I think. They are called Tumbleweed homes. People keep calling them the $99 dollar houses, which I knew was wrong. That is how much plans cost. The building material list is more along these lines. Still, not too bad. I would not be building it on a trailer, thus cutting some costs, but then adding costs by building a foundation. I would try to get it on a foundation (perhaps even with a small cellar), and have electric and gas attached.
Why? For one or two of those crazy women types who have some claim to me to have their own little nest. They would have to bring something to the effort, financially, mind you. But they would have a place to themselves, each. My mother would hate it, upon first seeing it. But after living with me for a week or two, she would be moving in faster than I could count to 1, 2, feminists suck, 3. *evil grins* My lady friend would absolutely love/hate it. As she does all her things. But they would have the main house if it got too cold/hot, for laundry, for bigger meals (or meals in general). But... with my rules. No mouthy woman crap in my presence. They want to natter, they could do it amongst each other or find friends to hate on. And being that they don't like each other much more than they like my manness and my attitude, it could work, mostly.
Yeah, well, my sense of humor never leaves me, mostly. Yes, to some of you women readers, I understand that you have no sense of my humor. But... think about it. You aren't supposed to have it. It's in the genes. *boing* I will try to get some work done tonight. This room has been started but not finished. And perhaps I could revisit the dishes. That is all.
Sleep well while I try to get my lump going faster than a snail. Good night.
.
I could not sleep so I tried to stay up, to take my friend out. Hmm, missed confession, church, I wanted to at least try for this. Nope. I completely ran out of steam. Yeah, it has to be the medicine this time around. How can you take full dose medicine when you can't take full dose medicine? That is easy, you don't. I will continue to do my best to take it until my next appointment. But I am shot. Little will happen in life until I start lowering the dosages is my guess. I will try but I realize I am back to zombieland. At least they honestly did do the increases slowly enough that I didn't actually 'black out'. Sure, it crept up on me, but I have been, for the most part, able to take the medicine up to this point. At this point though, that is almost the sum total of what I can do. I didn't lose a month, fall off medicine mostly, only to 'wake up' one day and feel guilty about... not taking my medicine. Back to those initial levels, it's as good as I can do, or want to do. Then again, even trying to just take it back to the last dosage level might be enough.
My appointment is coming up rather quickly. My mission, should I accept it (and I do), is to get there, somehow, by hook, crook, claw, or nail. It will be difficult. I can barely sit in this chair and type. Zombieland indeed. I wonder if all medicine does this? Every type, whether they were treating some false diagnosis or this real one, when it gets up to or even close to dose, does this. Do they have anything that doesn't cause a complete failure in my function? Is that their goal? I really don't know. I know only that nothing can help me if I can't take it. They might as well just quit and go home. That is what I will be doing after I inform them, mostly.
I did see a cool little home, again. I have written about these before. I never did find material costs and such until this time, I think. They are called Tumbleweed homes. People keep calling them the $99 dollar houses, which I knew was wrong. That is how much plans cost. The building material list is more along these lines. Still, not too bad. I would not be building it on a trailer, thus cutting some costs, but then adding costs by building a foundation. I would try to get it on a foundation (perhaps even with a small cellar), and have electric and gas attached.
Why? For one or two of those crazy women types who have some claim to me to have their own little nest. They would have to bring something to the effort, financially, mind you. But they would have a place to themselves, each. My mother would hate it, upon first seeing it. But after living with me for a week or two, she would be moving in faster than I could count to 1, 2, feminists suck, 3. *evil grins* My lady friend would absolutely love/hate it. As she does all her things. But they would have the main house if it got too cold/hot, for laundry, for bigger meals (or meals in general). But... with my rules. No mouthy woman crap in my presence. They want to natter, they could do it amongst each other or find friends to hate on. And being that they don't like each other much more than they like my manness and my attitude, it could work, mostly.
Yeah, well, my sense of humor never leaves me, mostly. Yes, to some of you women readers, I understand that you have no sense of my humor. But... think about it. You aren't supposed to have it. It's in the genes. *boing* I will try to get some work done tonight. This room has been started but not finished. And perhaps I could revisit the dishes. That is all.
Sleep well while I try to get my lump going faster than a snail. Good night.
Figuring yourself out.
.
.
Do you think, for the most part, you are a kind man or woman? Do you think you try your best, and that you even do pretty well? I know I do. I also know I am blind to much of what I do. Memory issues aside, I have to wonder what the other guy, gal, or "witnesses" thought. I do know I've probably not missed having a particular curse word used against me. I've been in a lot of fights. I've known a lot of women. How wrong was I? How judgmental? How many mistakes, real mistakes, did I make?
There is a song and a movie that... sure made me stop and think. The song is just a general notion. The movie... How much don't I remember. Nah, the movie is a bit extreme, even for me. At least in the deepest and darkest parts of it.
Do you really know who you are? Now, I will say this. Once I became a Christian, for sure, and to a greater degree, I do. Not that I'm not still capable of being a tool, just not that kind of tool. I can choose to sin, but I can't be made to do so.
.
Do you think, for the most part, you are a kind man or woman? Do you think you try your best, and that you even do pretty well? I know I do. I also know I am blind to much of what I do. Memory issues aside, I have to wonder what the other guy, gal, or "witnesses" thought. I do know I've probably not missed having a particular curse word used against me. I've been in a lot of fights. I've known a lot of women. How wrong was I? How judgmental? How many mistakes, real mistakes, did I make?
There is a song and a movie that... sure made me stop and think. The song is just a general notion. The movie... How much don't I remember. Nah, the movie is a bit extreme, even for me. At least in the deepest and darkest parts of it.
Do you really know who you are? Now, I will say this. Once I became a Christian, for sure, and to a greater degree, I do. Not that I'm not still capable of being a tool, just not that kind of tool. I can choose to sin, but I can't be made to do so.
I figured it out.
.
.
The reason my days and nights and sleep are becoming messed up is probably due to the increases in medicine. It makes me less able to be active, which makes it harder to sleep, which makes my days shift and twirl. And, perhaps, it makes me healthier so that even if I cannot function I do have the energy deep down inside. That keeps me awake. That is why they made the appointment for a month after this last increase. They thought I might bottom out and where hoping to give me some time before adding to the dosage. I hate to say it but I won't be ready for another increase. I know where that next step will take me.
I think I have hit the limits with medicine. The problem is, it is nowhere near where they want it to be in order to actually fix anything, if it can. But barring moving forward I may have to move backwards. If they can't figure something out, this is probably it. I will be discussing this next time. I don't have a wife to tend me. I don't have the capacity, as is, to tend myself. Something has to give. Ah well, I gave it a decent shot. The upshot is that on minimum doses I sure feel better. I might be dying faster, but I sure don't feel like it on low doses.
You can't say I didn't try.
.
The reason my days and nights and sleep are becoming messed up is probably due to the increases in medicine. It makes me less able to be active, which makes it harder to sleep, which makes my days shift and twirl. And, perhaps, it makes me healthier so that even if I cannot function I do have the energy deep down inside. That keeps me awake. That is why they made the appointment for a month after this last increase. They thought I might bottom out and where hoping to give me some time before adding to the dosage. I hate to say it but I won't be ready for another increase. I know where that next step will take me.
I think I have hit the limits with medicine. The problem is, it is nowhere near where they want it to be in order to actually fix anything, if it can. But barring moving forward I may have to move backwards. If they can't figure something out, this is probably it. I will be discussing this next time. I don't have a wife to tend me. I don't have the capacity, as is, to tend myself. Something has to give. Ah well, I gave it a decent shot. The upshot is that on minimum doses I sure feel better. I might be dying faster, but I sure don't feel like it on low doses.
You can't say I didn't try.
Sleep cycle is nuts.
.
.
You can try to sleep but that doesn't mean you will sleep. You can want to sleep with the same results. Who knows why. I simply cannot find sleep when I necessarily want or need it. Oh well. I have been doing more research regarding a solar power system. One thing I am certain about is that I can't depend on one completely to live the life I lead. Wait, let me take that back. I could if I wanted to use my acreage for solar panels and somehow spend a fortune. Then again, when I am filling out forms, I probably exaggerate without really knowing what I am talking about.
Several things do come to mind though. One line of questioning is how much electricity do I really use. How much of it is needed. With my sleep schedule being erratic, it will change. If I am awake in the day, I use very few lights. If I am awake at night, I blow the bank. I hate having the whole house dark. Now, I probably could get more lamps. Most of my main room lights are four bulb jobs. I suppose I could change those out? Uhm, no. When I want serious light I like having four 100 watt bulbs. But I could go with more single light lamps, or lamps with multiple independent bulbs. Anyway, I need to figure out how much electricity I really use.
Another question is how much I can reasonably cut back and how much I will seriously need to change in my lifestyle, if I want to have a (basically) off-grid system. When my mother returns home I will be disconnecting cable tv. But I will still watch movies from time to time. I will still use the dvd math tutorials occasionally. But that would only add up to, say, six hours a week, maybe twelve if I was studying heavily. Though I would like to get a refrigerator and freezer along the lines of what I showed D.C., or what he showed me, I wouldn't be using those unless there was a grid down event (probably?).
I would like to change to a propane drier, perhaps stove (unless I decided to go with a wood stove). Having both might have advantages for sideways reliability (no wood, no problem, no gas, no problem). Crazy talk, but. What I am saying is I would like to alter some of my appliances, change my ways a bit, and figure things out. I may start looking for a tool that allows me to measure my energy usage a bit more closely, and can check the power usage of items, or two different devices if need be.
Given all that, I still think going with the best solar system I can afford is the way forward. [after food and transport, of course] Oh, I really would love to upgrade my kitchen in there somehow, but that looks like it slid so far down the list as to be off the list, for now. After the power source, I then have appliances and tools to consider. Everything from a wood burning stove and stock stand alone heater, to propane drier, and perhaps propane stove/oven, and in there as well, canning supplies, livestock, kit for livestock, and the rest.
I feel like a ship run by a crazy captain. He wants to go where it is safe, due north. But he wants to go where it is warm, due south. So he commands they head north by south! I still want some good things in life. I still want to enjoy what is enjoyable, while I can. But I don't want to squander time or money or my own energy. How about north by southnorth? Oh, I thought about a solar water heaters, but I think just my power plant will take up all available reasonable slots for solar panels. I might make those propane though. I wish I could consolidate the hot water supply, but the distance and complexity would make that a bit fail, I think.
Anyway, I keep looking and finding out more. I suppose some of this will come through osmosis, some will have to be the hard work of crunching numbers, figuring out amps, volts, wiring, components, learning how to install things, how to configure them, making and reading diagrams, and ugh stuff. None of it will be easy, at all. Even the pro's mess it up. And, I would argue the pro's are almost more likely to mess it up because they are never who they seem. DIY is the best way so you know what is in there, you know what goes where, you will probably learn any maintenance along the way. Why have a system you know nothing about for a time when there may be nobody to help?
I have to take my friend shooting at 13:00 and it is now 7:05. I need a bit of sleep, anyway. Good night.
.
You can try to sleep but that doesn't mean you will sleep. You can want to sleep with the same results. Who knows why. I simply cannot find sleep when I necessarily want or need it. Oh well. I have been doing more research regarding a solar power system. One thing I am certain about is that I can't depend on one completely to live the life I lead. Wait, let me take that back. I could if I wanted to use my acreage for solar panels and somehow spend a fortune. Then again, when I am filling out forms, I probably exaggerate without really knowing what I am talking about.
Several things do come to mind though. One line of questioning is how much electricity do I really use. How much of it is needed. With my sleep schedule being erratic, it will change. If I am awake in the day, I use very few lights. If I am awake at night, I blow the bank. I hate having the whole house dark. Now, I probably could get more lamps. Most of my main room lights are four bulb jobs. I suppose I could change those out? Uhm, no. When I want serious light I like having four 100 watt bulbs. But I could go with more single light lamps, or lamps with multiple independent bulbs. Anyway, I need to figure out how much electricity I really use.
Another question is how much I can reasonably cut back and how much I will seriously need to change in my lifestyle, if I want to have a (basically) off-grid system. When my mother returns home I will be disconnecting cable tv. But I will still watch movies from time to time. I will still use the dvd math tutorials occasionally. But that would only add up to, say, six hours a week, maybe twelve if I was studying heavily. Though I would like to get a refrigerator and freezer along the lines of what I showed D.C., or what he showed me, I wouldn't be using those unless there was a grid down event (probably?).
I would like to change to a propane drier, perhaps stove (unless I decided to go with a wood stove). Having both might have advantages for sideways reliability (no wood, no problem, no gas, no problem). Crazy talk, but. What I am saying is I would like to alter some of my appliances, change my ways a bit, and figure things out. I may start looking for a tool that allows me to measure my energy usage a bit more closely, and can check the power usage of items, or two different devices if need be.
Given all that, I still think going with the best solar system I can afford is the way forward. [after food and transport, of course] Oh, I really would love to upgrade my kitchen in there somehow, but that looks like it slid so far down the list as to be off the list, for now. After the power source, I then have appliances and tools to consider. Everything from a wood burning stove and stock stand alone heater, to propane drier, and perhaps propane stove/oven, and in there as well, canning supplies, livestock, kit for livestock, and the rest.
I feel like a ship run by a crazy captain. He wants to go where it is safe, due north. But he wants to go where it is warm, due south. So he commands they head north by south! I still want some good things in life. I still want to enjoy what is enjoyable, while I can. But I don't want to squander time or money or my own energy. How about north by southnorth? Oh, I thought about a solar water heaters, but I think just my power plant will take up all available reasonable slots for solar panels. I might make those propane though. I wish I could consolidate the hot water supply, but the distance and complexity would make that a bit fail, I think.
Anyway, I keep looking and finding out more. I suppose some of this will come through osmosis, some will have to be the hard work of crunching numbers, figuring out amps, volts, wiring, components, learning how to install things, how to configure them, making and reading diagrams, and ugh stuff. None of it will be easy, at all. Even the pro's mess it up. And, I would argue the pro's are almost more likely to mess it up because they are never who they seem. DIY is the best way so you know what is in there, you know what goes where, you will probably learn any maintenance along the way. Why have a system you know nothing about for a time when there may be nobody to help?
I have to take my friend shooting at 13:00 and it is now 7:05. I need a bit of sleep, anyway. Good night.
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