Awake since almost six.

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I know I checked the temp, outdoors.  Can't, for the... oh, right.  It was 41.  I had meant to check again, before it started to warm, to see what the coldest temp might be.  But missed it.  Here at a quarter after nine, it is 63.  Not a bad temp.

With everything closed up, only the circulation fan on the furnace going (it set to 68 but not needing to run) and a fan going upstairs for air flow, it was 72 in the main, 73 near me, upstairs.  And down here it was 71 in the main, now 73, and 68 up front here, which it remains.  Very nice.

A lot of music.

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I... may do more, later.  It's been piling up.  And... I like the notion.  Her?  A her?  Maybe.  Some of my friends chuckle at my notions.  Others... suspect there might be something to them?  I don't know.  Don't care.  Just... the... songs fit... something.  So I began collecting them.  But so many.

Just three, this time.  From a while back.  I had collected these.  Then just never posted them.  but they keep cycling.  Which... is unusual.  I rarely see a song more than a few times a year, if it's an oldy... one I used to view a lot or a little.

Bedtime.

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I just had to try a few more things, to get through the roadblock in the game.  And, to that end, I succeeded.  The plan was to get through, then go on to bed, early.  Earlier.  I... got lost, in exploring.  No real direct plan, if a few ideas of what I wanted to do next.  As it turns out, I have done what I know how to do.  Everything from here on is... an unknown.  

I tried to figure out where to go.  As, I actually do know what I am supposed to do.  The problem is, I am not seeing any sort of path, or means of creating or developing a path, to where the 'toon is supposed to go.  I'll figure it out next time.

I will sleep as long as I need, "tonight".  I have been pushing sleep, or wakefulness, or failing to sleep well, lately.  I... need sleep!  So tired my eyes hurt.  My body is sore.  Things just aren't comfortable.  But... so it goes.  I'm still not sure why I am not dead.  It doesn't make sense.

What a... strange collection of pops.

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I just noticed strange things, looked, and patterns... emerged.  More than I am showing... for reasons.  But... enough.  Enough to share out of my mind, into this electronic nether.  If for no other reason that to suggest I see, and... maybe more.  Odd how the world works.

The many faced servant?  Perhaps.

While I remember realizing all things were possible?

Warming.

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Heating, really.  It is 78 out there, partly cloudy but it doesn't matter.  The reports suggest today will be the warmest day for a while, getting to 81.  But it is only supposed to be 74 now, so... your mileage may vary.  It's hot.  Actually.  The next warmest day I have seen in a few months has been 73.  Before that, 52 has been a typical day out there.  Nuggets!

Oh well.

I tried something I have been meaning to try for a while... roe.  Oh, not... the fancy stuff.  Just humble men's offerings.  Stuff I could afford, in smaller doses, from time to time.  Trying to add more seafood.  Most of the locals stores sell Chinese caught and/or processed, frozen or fresh.  I don't even trust their labels, at this point.  When it became obvious what was happening, they just... changed the labels.  Why would a Chinese fishery brand all of a sudden be coming out of Vietnam?  And, since when did Vietnam, or Laos, or some other dubious nations, have access to enough fishing waters, or commercial fishing boats, to deliver any kind of product?  No...

Gotta watch em' every step of the of way, I'm telling you.

Anyway... so... roe.  On cream cheese, put on those keto crackers.  I tried it straight up.  A bit... gamey, fishy, salty.  I had heard it may be better to rinse them.  A tricky thing, for smaller roe, but... doable... with acceptable losses.  Nope.  Just too fishy/gamy.  Oh, and, yes, I have tried expensive roe.  I still think it is a joke being played on the ultra rich, like diamonds, pearls, and other such.  Trust me, they get screwed, if they seem to enjoy it.

So, no.  Roe won't work.  I have sardines, and other canned fishes.  And places to buy fresh American fish, if those are beyond my means.  Then again, so is beef these days.  I have tried to fish, but just gas and the lack of success make that a no-go at this point.  So, I guess, canned tuna, salmon, sardines, and the like, will simply have to do.

Up, not quite at it.

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Planning on a shower, shortly.  My feet are... really doing well!  Just after a few days of solid slathering, and more frequent showers, plus a little bit of cuticle and nail trimming care.  Well, and taking a few extra water pills to get the lead out!  Oh, and, my nails, toe and finger, are beginning to grow much faster.  I have backed off protein powder a bit, too.  I suppose it is just catching up, or warming up, or both.

Down between two and three again.  Up at about 09:30.  Pushing it.  But... I... couldn't sleep last night.  And... I... couldn't sleep more this morning.  It is what it is.  Oh, and I checked outdoors, first thing.  It was already 52 outside!  I did leave the windows open upstairs (only, shut up the downstairs).  It only got down to 59 up there?  Weird, but okay.  And, I didn't turn the furnace back on yesterday.  It's 62 in this front room, and 66 but oddly warm in the main room.  I did turn the furnace on, and up, but just to 72.  The chill has broken, or for today.

A bit cloudy.  That may or may not pass.  I'll have to try to sit out there, or do something out there.  Sun or no, as long as it doesn't rain.  Dancing in the rain is only cosher if it is, or has been, warmer.  I'm not ready for that today.  It honestly feels like it could snow though, again?  Oh well.

Today?  Trying to get back to things.  Breakfast is going, though just chia.  I'll have the chop and eggs later.  A shower, and very shortly.  Then dressed, and going, and on to some business.  I'd like to get to the grocery store, though who knows.  And, I'd like to sort storage in the kitchen, so I can clear the freezertop of the extra jars!  Ugh!  I can probably get enough foodstuffs down to the basement pantry to open up the shelves.  Probably.  And, if I go that way, I may open a whole lot of space... putting foods down, AND other things in their own, and/or rightful, place(s).  Bleh.

I think I can, I think, I can, I think I can, said the little choo-choo train.

Have a great morning and day.  Eat a spot, have a beverage of some sort, straighten your mind around, and get to it.  Good morning and day.

How... does that work out.

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I had to listen.

I love it...

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When I meet a white knight, who thinks... most of what they think.

That might be it.

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Or, the last of the problems.  With medicine down, bp is 118/87 at a pulse of 81.  Good enough.  Not sure if it is exactly where the doc wants it, but it is far better than 150/110, and far better than 225/180.  Choices, choices.  That is 17 days on meds, including two new ones.  It may be too much, or something else could be wrong.

Ah, blood sugar.  I haven't tested that in a very long time.  And I have been eating terribly for a few weeks.  The last two days, mostly, I have been keto.  Cold turkey, minus a huge wrong turn, then back.  My tester was being non-specific, if quite genial?  "Hi".  Hi... back?  Oh, right.  No, that means it was above good numbers, by a lot.  My last few machines were 'genial' when my blood sugar was above 600 to 650.  I think my last one read to 650 at least.  Not a good number.

Anyway, so, yeah.  Though, to be honest, blood sugar, even that high, usually isn't a problem, it doesn't have symptoms.  However, this time I am pretty sure it does have symptoms.  So, insulin.  Of both types.  I need to be careful.  When I stop eating carbs, in a hurry, sometimes my blood sugar remains extremely high.  But with one to four more potent doses, I can crash so hard and fast, a coma or death is possible.

So... while I have hit it hard and heavy, I will be checking.  I will continue to dose in the stratosphere, in hopes of bringing it down quickly.  But I will test frequently, even if nothing seems to be happening.  I have set the alarm for two and an half hours, and will check then.  If it's still high, and it probably will be, I will dose it between medium and high (probably).  When it starts being in the 180 range, or crashing, then I'll slow this and that, and perhaps eat carbs if absolutely necessary.  

So, yeah, it could be diabetes.  If so, between regular medicine, bp, pulse, and blood sugars, then being careful with what I eat and drink, I may be able to improve quickly.  I really hope so.  I am so tired of being so very tired, and hurting everywhere.  I... just... lost track.  I do what I honestly can, I just can't always do it all.  On the good side, if I can get things back on track, I can get in for a blood test a bit before my upcoming doctor visit.  Too bad I can visit for a blood test, but not go in to see the doctor.  It's no longer just the mask, it's also the jab.  I get the feeling they would try a hard sale, and maybe threats of various sorts, if I go it.  I wonder if he has a hundred grand riding on the number of people he can "vax".  I doubt if he would care, even if he knows it's bad.  He can get a fake one, and this might help him get some properties sold off for his kids or grandkids... or a Switzerland skiing trip, or pay off the nurse he bungled... and the kid.  He... is a businessman, before a medical practitioner, probably.  They all seem to be these days.  Sell their mothers for a few dollars more.

Anyway...  It wouldn't be a bad deal, to at least get blood tested.  Later.

Some... other thoughts.

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It would be interesting to think that they know.  That they know and don't like it.  Is it possible, that tools and devices are picking up on what seers, mystics, and else are understanding, have understood for a long time.  They use different terms, but the time, or a time, approaches.  It would be interesting if they could see through tech what some see through... other means.

Time killer?

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Want to bet?  Here.  Not to... prove a point.  Just to... do my job?  *grins*

Nah, not much more.

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I do know I need to, possibly, get to town soon.  The problem is the last time I was out my tires were low.  My vehicle was one of the first with a stupidwarning.  It doesn't say which tire, or all, or how much.  It only puts on a dumblight if one, or all, are below pressure.  Best to take a look, but I was pretty much to town when it came on.  And they looked good enough.  So I just finished and returend.

I have a cordless air compressor.  It worked as advertised.  One tire, the rear left, driver side, was down by 8.  At 27, it didn't really look low.  I keep them at 35, am considering pumping them just a bit higher in the winters.  Not sure, yet, but... a notion of a possibility I must research.  The other tires were all either 33 or 33.5.  The device was easy to use, and the process was quick and painless.

I looked all over the tires for the marking of the highest pressure, the max.  It was never, explicitly, given.  It was passively suggested, as I see things.  It can go to 50psi, but 35 (which wasn't give at all) is what the vehicle recommends (if that was for stock tires, which these aren't).  Still, I do believe they were set at 35psi, recommended, as well.  Why don't they write that on the tires, in easy to see formats?  Still, I got the tires aired up.

I couldn't find my pressure gauge, any of them.  The device has one built in.  Even so, I prefer to test.  If nothing else, a double check.  I... prefer to check tire pressures manually.  I don't trust digital things all that much.  Still, it is good, in a pinch, to not need one.  Need has little to do with things, always.  Tradition?  Or... just... a double check, front and back?  Something.

I also checked in on my friend.  It seems he did quit early.  It dipped below 50, to 46 I think he said.  There are spots where it does get colder.  All valleys, even on the plains, depending on weather patterns, wind channels, and else... there are spots which are colder, sometimes static, sometimes changing.  It was still 52 here, but we are a bit higher?  Well, we aren't a low spot, near water?  I think that is more it.  And where we are situated is warmer in the winter, and cooler in the summer, than on either wall of the valley.

I would have thought, being out in the middle of it, we would be colder.  But the winds are much less of a factor in a major cauldron like valley, of, say, 50 to 70 miles by 30 miles?  Roughly, and mostly.  We have mini-titty mountains inside of the valley itself.  It's... a strange place.  But, with no real wind, the snow likes to pile along the mountain sides, while the sun burns those in a strange way.  Or... that is what I believe to be the cause.  Who... really knows.

Oh, on to... something.  I'd like to hit the dishes, once, anyway.  And refill waterers while at it.  I won't finish the dishes.  That'll have to wait until tomorrow.  Hopefully first thing.  Then a shower, and maybe shave.  Chores, and counters?  Something.  Ugh...  Good night.

Down to 50.

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I am not sure if it dropped below even that.  I think it was around 05:30 when I checked.  Crazy.  That is very cool.  It has been down to 46, that I saw, not too long ago.  Crazy, I suppose, can get crazier.  It is getting up to the high 80s and into the 90s, possibly as high as into the 100s not too far away.  But getting as cool as it is really puts a dent in the feel of that.

Just a third into August, and one really does get the feel of fall, later September, even mid to later October.  I am sleeping odd hours.  As if my body isn't sure how to deal with things.  The cool makes me want to sleep, the heat makes me want to work... until it breaks me.  My physical form just doesn't quite know how to handle the weather.

Here, at twenty to nine, it is 62 out there.  The sun is up, but hasn't broken through whatever is between it and the ground.  Clouds?  Inversion?  Smoke?  A mix?  It will, probably, get quite hot out there today.  Or may.  Humidity is at 36%.  Down from the 40s, even high 50s for that bit.  Though it could go either way, in a hurry, with just a bit of something or other coming through.  Though, truth be told, it is... pleasant, mostly.

Blood sugar dropped to 122 with a small meal and dose of insulin.  As such, I'm having another small meal, coffee this time, with milk, and cheese.  Micromanaging might end up biting me where it hurts most, but... I... want to try.  If it drops a bit too much, I'll just have something else to eat.  I need to cook up some burger, for a taco salad, anyway.

Does anyone get the sense that the world has gone absolutely black, the wrong way, is going in the wrong direction, top to bottom?  I'm not sure if the elites are pulling a Jim Jones.  Perhaps they know, or believe, their world is going to end and want to go out on top?  Or, they have just lost all faith, but as worldly people, believe death for all is better than living in poverty, or in difficult times?

Something very wicked this way comes.

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We no longer have a government.  Neither is it legitimate, nor is it for our benefit.  The military, intelligence services, even the bureaucracies, are against us.  Who, exactly, are they for?  Do they even know?  Do they just, as with tyrannies past, just do what they are told, just do their job, and not worry about who gives the orders or the effects those have?

It is even to a point where they aren't supporting what had been their system supports.  From Hollywood to the media, not only have people dropped out, but the powers that be aren't even trying to create the fake numbers which lend legitimacy.  The only reason most companies remain seemingly alive is because they are being bought by our government which is being bought by China, Japan, and whoever else is buying our debt.  It's... all debt, their is no value, worth, wealth, in any of that.

Everything is illegitimate at this point.  Nothing is supported by the people.  Whoever is in power doesn't care.  What is it they know, or think they know?  Who really is endangered?  Who is writing the scripts for news and else?  And what is coming?  I am pretty sure they don't know much.  They are afraid.  Not really of us, but of something.  Are they just buying time?  Or is there some kind of game at hand, one they think can be won?

I would be cautious.  Don't trust what you hear, what they say.  Be ready.  Have some extra food on hand.  Don't do anything without really thinking it through, no matter how dire the warnings seem.  Be careful out there, folks.  Something is terribly wrong and very few are honestly on your side.  Many who have your ear may well sell you out to get even another day themselves, or for their family.

It's coming, slow or fast.

A strange compilation.

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Meaning?  Who knows.  Drawn, to a few things.  Mostly new, some old.  Enjoy, or not.

Did not stay awake long enough.

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Crashed, and hard, right after righting that.  Back to bed, just waking at 05:03.  Not sure I'll be awake long even this time.  Maybe?  No dreams remembered, if I think I keep dreaming of flying.  That strange type of flying, which both is and isn't a sort of flight, moving at exceptional speeds, and is more something between flight and teleportation.  Once you have everything dialed into, to within a block... which takes a while... a month or several?  Once all dialed in, for the earth, movement takes a moment.

Whether going shopping at my usual grocery store, having a luncheon in Paris (if I wouldn't these days), a late snack in Jordan, a tea in Japan, or such, the travel time duration difference is not measured even in seconds.  Still, whether going to the refrigerator, clothes dryer, or Timbuktu, one generally needs a reason.  Usually, finding a reason is... not a good thing.

Oh, the temptation to go into any cash or precious metal depository... taking as I wish?  Besides the various risks of flesh, there is always the risk of the soul.  Nothing, as I told my friend earlier, is free.  Is it worth risking the soul for something not paid?  And... God is always watching.  No, not to me.  Still, to see a few sights... from The peaks of the highest mountains to, certain shore views at dawn or dusk?  To watch some of the most spectacular wildlife, and events in their lives unfold?  To see miracles of life, for people, unfold.  Maybe to even play some small part in a success that might not have happened?

The thing is, such a power does not make one God.  Saving the world from reality, or itself, or even a few men... and women?  As tempting evil?  More so perceived good.  The most difficult thing is to let people choose and face consequences... to follow in the real God's footsteps, or try.  Hard?  Unimaginably... or... nearly.  But, yes, I.... foreswore playing God shortly after my initial foray into miracles.

Not all of this was from the dreams, just things from the dreams, coupled with thoughts from the dreams... while awake.  The thing, beyond, is there is no way to save everyone.  Choosing who to save becomes quite the thing.  Then the temptation to end those who are evil creeps in.  Also, not... to be done.  People must choose.  Prices must be paid.  And even the innocent must die, and the guilty must live.  It was terrible, realizing some things.

There is a place to... affect change.  Self-defense is a requirement... a universal law.  Protecting and helping one's own, and community up to a certain point.  Oh, and keeping one's abilities from being know, too, is required.  They would hound you night at day for everything from lost keys to petty or right vendettas, to lost cattle, or a structurally unsound home.  You would become a false god, and loved by those you helped, hated by those you didn't, wouldn't, or couldn't.

Anyway... for whatever reason, the last week I have been flying around, looking the world over.  Most nights, and some shorter sleeps, dreams of flying.  Mostly touring.  Or just the enjoyment of the... flights.  I got the feeling I wasn't the only one out there.  Though the others kept out of my ability to see.  Angels, I suspect.  Perhaps demons?  Too, I suspect if I started "helping" the world, life would have become difficult.

Oh, there were ways to... biome wealthy doing this.  And I did, to a degree, profit.  But gold, wealth, and such, has to be tempered... as with the other things.  And getting rich has never been a great calling, for me.  Just a... rare item here, or there, otherwise lost to men.  Or noticing where certain minerals or other commodities might be... a thing unnoticed to point by others.  It... doesn't take much.  What dreams.

Later.

Already back up... just for a bit?

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I went to bed at 21:36.  Wanted to remember, did.  Woke a bit after midnight.  Couldn't remember the exact time, didn't try.  Dreamed.  In the dream, I put together an incident report of what actually did happen today.

As I was out, I grabbed a meal at a burger joint.  They have two lanes, some asshat pulled in the other way then tried to muscle his way through to my lane.  Nope.  Plus a few choice words.  Nigger being one of them.  One he happened to be.  He finished his ordering process before me, but tried to have me go first.  Nope.  I only ever want what is mine.  He paid for my meal.

Now, that would have seemed cool, but I was pretty sure that wasn't a gift.  I had no choice, but that was that.  I kept my awareness about me the rest of the night.  Turns out I was being tagged.  His vehicle was very peculiar.  A higher end, but a ministation wagon one.  I had never seen that config.  On my way to check on the critters, it was pretty dark, and I was switching lanes, and leaving the road, often enough that, tracking me would have been difficult.  And would have been noticed.

I kept seeing blacks, however, on the way up.  Which... was unusual.  Especially so many.  Yea, I... was wondering.  But I didn't see him.  On the way back, I did see him.  He, and at least one other vehicle, were jacking around... he was ahead of me, going just slow enough to make sure I would catch up, another was blocking the outer lane, but began advancing, and a third suv was behind, and began a push.

Then we all saw a cop suv, and all the tomshittery up and stopped.  Ten to one, they were using listening devices used by cops to hear what occupants are saying.  I knew cops had that years ago... proved it to Kordell by getting a cop to nearly ram us.  *grins*  Don't fuck with a psyops, boys and girls.  Anyway... looks like antifa, blm, agents, even in small college towns, have that gear.  If too, it looks like cops know about it and are on to some of it?  I saw three more cops on my way home.  I took a different path, checked as well as able, and got home eventually without seeing more.

Now... are the cops... which angle are they playing.  For all I know, saying nigger is grounds for arrest these days.  It looked like they broke up the attack, which only hadn't happened because they aren't used to attacking a driver who is willing to do what it takes to... keep out.  But... watch it out there, boys and girls, the groids are up in arms, and are on the attack.  Go armed or go home, and be ready to fight for your lives.  Don't die because a monkey doesn't like a word.  There is a reason they are called what they are called.

And, just understand, the cops aren't always going to be on your side, even when they seem to be.  They are so politically correct driven, they may be pc drones.

I remember, when taken from Iowa to Chicago, to the deserter detention center, in three points all the way... even on the airplane.  I think they try to break people that way?  And, then, at the center... where they tried their best to humiliate, hurt, bother.  I... just didn't mind.  Sitting there, allowed to do nothing, for days and weeks.  I... had no difficulty with anything.  Then... they realized... just what I was.  All stupid shittery stopped.  They... were told nothing of me.  Which, on top of their own instincts, frightened them even more.  Death, it was a form of death, they had bottled up.  One who was on a cruise like vacation, for all intents and purposes.  Worse, a Noone Death.  They all learn, in time.  I think half of the parties involved tonight know.  The other party may learn so fast it never registers.

It was a white or silver audi q7 or etron, I believe.  Saw it one too many times, in one too many places, for coincidence.  And in a caravan at the end.  So... yeah.  Watch it.  Watch for it.

But you, out there, watch it.  They are listening into your car.  Ask a cop friend about the tech.  They almost all, or all, have it in their vehicles.  Might not be admissible in court, but can lead them to what is or keep them from being shot.  *wink*  But that is how they are choosing who to pull out of vehicles and etc.  They may be listening to your homes, while they march by, as well... tagging certain people for future and present attacks.  Watch yourself out there.

Her too?

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Eh, tu, Bruta?  A she, yes.  Oh... she... wants me to believe other than how I know.

Trump did it.

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How, exactly, did he get Mitch and the others to go along?  Didn't even need Pence's vote.  Even got the cow ski to go along?  He didn't, publicly, push all that hard.  But he had to have done some back room brawling.  Absolutely no doubt about that.  Further, they believe he is going to win the election, or they simply wouldn't have switched sides.  Three or four republican senators are democrats in truth.  But, they... live in republican waters.  Easy access, but not often accessed.

No, it won't matter.  She, as stated, is a woman.  She isn't her own keeper, no woman is.  The question is, who is.  Her husband, her bishop, the pope?  How compromised is she, and to whom?  The third Trump installation, of four conservative judges installed of the last four.  And?  And very little change on the courts.  None of them are reliable.  Most of them are weakly constitutional, in truth.  I don't think it matters.

I hear she will be better than Ginsburg.  That's, really, a lot like saying Hitler was better than Stalin or Lenin even.  Yes, well... and it depends on whom.  Better for who?  If a Jew or gypsy or even Catholic, which was worse is dependent.  Hitler killed some Catholics, Lenin killed all of us he could find.  Both intended to murder all the Jews, but Stalin sold them at $10k a head, if many were just hardened criminals he wanted to be gone.  If you are a baby, will she matter?  With this pope, very possibly maybe not.

Something about excusing herself from decisions in which the pope has spoken?  Right.  Among other problems.  What hasn't this, or that, or some other, pope... specifically, religiously, or personally, expressed opinions regarding?  Well, and he just came out for gay civil unions.  What do you want to bet she won't be against those?

Better than Ginsburg?  Who to whom?

There is a chance, a hope.  If, usually, hope is for the forlorn.   So be it.  I am happy to see Trump got his nominee through.  I just wish he would have picked a good one.  Perhaps there are no good nominees at this point?  Then again, the liberal campaign against her was rather... pathetic.  I have some wonder that she is considered reasonable by them... not a good thing.  Or, they have her, one way or another.

Time will tell.  But this is just another judge Roberts, if I was to lay odds.  Her "kids" are the tell.

Bringing out the boy in the man.

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I watch this guy's videos with some frequency.  He covers swords, to battle axes, to movie reconstructions, to sword inlays of historic natures.  Everything a lad, or man, could imagine in the world of battle weapons of an old to very old European bent.  As well, he has... ideas... such as how to improve on a "Legolas" bow.  Look it up or never mind, but quite a curiosity... with potential for more.