Saturday, May 20, 2023

Out and back again.

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Warm out there.  Not really hot, yet.  But it's on the way.  It was a pleasant drive.  Would only have been more pleasant if I wasn't so very tired.

I busted myself a bit, pushing to get up and out.  I checked my balance.  I have $2 and change in my account.  Possibly overdrawn.  Will... look at things, see if any bills weren't paid.  Figure out what I can do about anything.  Yea.

Today?  Just getting returns which were probably about timed out, to amazon.  Not a lot of money back, but some.  Still, it will take a week for the deposit to be made.  They are getting slower and slower with returns.  Hey, I'm not... grumping, just saying.  Even big businesses have become bent over a barrel.  Not as sorry for them as I am for the little people.  But... too, I... understand.

I didn't weigh in.  Won't.  Already having a water.  Will have a coffee in a bit.  Both without anything, but just drinking 20 ounces of water will add weight.  Hopefully, tomorrow, I can be up and awake when it is reasonable, as I wish, without pushing.  And, then, can take my weight.  I'm not expecting any loss.  Maybe some gain.  Too tired and messed up to do any work, or much of anything.  So, weight is probably stuck in this range until I can catch a wind of some sort, and begin acting, moving, working.

Oh, mass later.  It sounds like a meal after.  I think I have a small stash of cash around.  *sigh*  Trying to save, here and there, but... not this month.  Ugh.

Awake?

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Yes, but it took... all morning.  That sounds silly, but I have been... waking?  Sort of.  Since seven.  That was too early.  Then it hit about ten and eleven.  But then I couldn't get up.  I did get up just shortly after noon, here it is nearly 13:00.  Still sitting here, but trying to get going in the day.

It was 74 outside, 64 inside, when I finally got up.  Dressed, and ready, mostly.  Had to find socks, and shoes.  Flipflops worked until then.  Yes, I got shoes and socks on, just not tied yet.  A complicated day.  Will see what I can do.

Down at a quarter to five up at ten after noon.  Meh.  It will do.  Blood sugar is 195 fasting.  At least it is back below 200.  Doing what I can, eating correctly.  Just not active enough, at this point.  Will keep trying.  On to it.

Friday, May 19, 2023

On to the tonic.

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It's something.  It is filling.  I am hungry.  That works.

It was still 70 just a quarter to half an hour ago.  Being so mild, pleasant, I decided to open up the windows... three of them anyway.  While showering, I got caught up on compression socks and underwear.  Odd things, but they are easier to wash while I shower.  They need to be hand washed.  And, I can just take them off while I am getting in.  They dry within a day.  Underwear I try to wash every day, or every other day, depending on showering.  But change daily.  Socks are washed after three of four wearings.  By manufacturing suggested practices.

Moving air helps those dry.

I had the fans on last night.  One pointing into the room from the far window, one pointing at me, and then also generally, off a wall, toward the opposite window from the pulling fan.  I think the fan, on me, helped with sleep the most.  Though, I haven't had fans on recently, being a bit too cold out.  While 40 is well above freezing, as the days warm, my acclimation point changes.  And, 40, now, is the new 26, by feel.  But I sure like a fan.  Hmm... might consider getting a smaller fan.  Like an office desk fan, for up there.  With or without an ac running.  Just... a little face air.  Love that.

Hoped.

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I had hoped to be out.  To get to town.  Had specific things to do, and had to be out by no later that 16:30.  There... just wasn't any way to make that.  I tried.  I kept an eye on the clock.  I got the shower first thing.  I had coffee in an attempt to push things along.

It wasn't enough.  Awake too late.  Or, too late to make it to town.  It is 70, in here, even right near the computer.  Sort of amazing, really.  I had thought it was probably up to 80 out there, by now.  But upon just checking, it is... down to 72?  So... very strange.  The sun was out, too.  Very odd.  Usually, often, the sun on even partially sunny days will heat the place incredibly.  Nope, not this day.  And so cool, while the sun is even yet up?  Without clouds or other weather formations?  Strange.  Strange days indeed.

Anyway.  The goal is, then, to do some work.  Wear myself out mechanically if possible.  Then sleep as early as possible.  Waking tomorrow, at a time which will allow me to get to town.  Things to do.  Other than mass and a meeting a week, I haven't been able to be out in... two weeks?  Three?  I missed a mass in there.  Yeah.  Tomorrow... tomorrow?  Tomorrow.

Awake!?!

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While I have gotten up, out of bed, and been... somewhat active the last few weeks?  I haven't been awake in at least the last, and more like the last two weeks.  Why?  I don't know.  Very rough.  Never awake, never asleep.  Sleep was... bad, averaging in the 30s to 40s (out of a hundred).  Technically, last night was a poor sleep, but that... was because my sleep cycle has moved outside of the parameters I set on the watch, so it... wasn't reading the right things, for the algos for that, at the right times.  Sleep was very good, and long.  I did catch up a bit.

A shower, first thing.  Weighing in right after, at 260.4.  I gained .4 pounds ~6.4 ounces, since I weighed in last, four or five days ago.  Blood sugar is high.  Oranges?  At 232 fasting.  Still... it is what it is.  Hungry, though.  Definitely the oranges.  Then again, I have been hungry even before that.  Still, while plateaued on weight loss, for the most part, I am eating... better.  Much better.

I really am awake, functionally, in the mind and body... both.  I have been awake one way, or the other, just not both.  Can I do anything with that?  I don't know, but will try.  It is 76 out there, or last I looked.  May get up to eighty.  Is it the warmth doing it?  Could be.  Oh, but... so nice to... mostly... be awake.  Now to see about getting my body to function.

While out checking the temp, I strolled through my asparagus bed.  Some spears, so I harvested and ate while looking.  I should check weekly.

Will try to do... some things... yet today.  Did get that shower, first thing.  Then fed Sassy.  Should check her litter box.  Trying to keep up on that, but did I miss a bit yesterday?  I'll... find out.  On to a new, awake, alive, day.

Sleep is way off.

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I think I got three hours in the last forty eight hours?  Something like that.  While I couldn't sleep, I did stay in bed, for a stretch.  Attempting to obtain more sleep, or at least rest.  Eyes wide open.  Toes tapping.  Much of the time.  Three hours of sleep just isn't pleasant.

It is warming up around here.  That is getting to me.  Odd.  It is only 70, here, near the computer.  But I am sweating.  It is 40 F outdoors.

I have had food.  Hmm, a kefir, a fatted coffee, two quarter pound patties, four strips of bacon, and about a quarter pound of mushrooms... and a single vinegar tonic.  Oh, but three oranges (they were going bad, wanted to eat them), a can of sardines (in ev olive oil), and two "keto" crackers... 12 carbs for two, I believe.  Blood sugar has been in the low 200s today, until just now.  It is 180.  I just don't get it.

I haven't weighed in.  Won't until I get some sleep.  Hopefully "tonight", as in shortly.  I'll see.

Strange... thoughts... through the sleeplessness.  And vids and music of course.

Thursday, May 18, 2023

To sleep very late.

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Awake so very early.  In some sort of distress for it, but naught to be done about it.  It is 64 out there, mostly overcast?  Partly?  Difficult for me to clarify, as the sky is in flux and I am not awake or able to shake off sleepiness.

Videos yet come.  Aimed at me?  I tell you, these things I learned... long ago.  I learned to add in ten minutes of silence into my nightly prayer.  Further, to make an attempt to hear people, not just listen to them.  God, sometimes, speaks through them.  Even videos, like this one.  More?  I attend my animal companions.  And... they... tell me much.  Even that they love me.  Important things.

I couldn't.

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Fasting all day was just too much today.  Why I can't say.  Only, I gave it a reasonable shot.  Now, it will pass for what many consider a day of fasting, eating one light meal and, or soon, two snacks.  I consider two to three cups of kefir, plain, with nothing added and an orange, a snack.  As well, I had a fatted coffee and soup.  And, later, I will have one more kefir.  So, I did fast, and intermittent fast, but not a nothing day.  Ugh.

The temperature, last I checked, was down to 40.  Not a bad thing.  Just, still surprisingly cool.  Though, that it got to 78, and would have easily topped well into the 80s if a storm hadn't barged in, does show that... normal temps are coming.  And, it will hit hard, and fast, when it does.

Our river, just to the east, is becoming eerily deep.  It is up to the bridge.  Could it go over?  I think that is dam water they are letting through.  The real question to that is, could they, even for a bit, stop the dam?  I'm not sure that is necessarily possible, or for long.  So... could lose the bridge to the closer town.  Have lost other passages, smaller bridges and simple roads, to the flooding already.  It could be quite worse, but... it is what it is for now.

Wednesday, May 17, 2023

While dreaming, thinking.

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I have a window I need replaced.  It is leaky, air gets through... not water.  It is old, ugly, doesn't open properly, or close rightly.  A big one.  I think it is 36" x 48".  I want, what, a double hung?  Right.  I think the last time I looked they were... six to eight hundred?  If that might have been in the middle of covid, so prices may have been... exorbitant?  Maybe.  Haven't looked since.

It would take a month or two of savings, so I could put half on credit, half in cash, if that is the price.  If it's a thousand or more now, than... longer.  No use grumbling, it is what it is.

So, initially, I am hoping to take the old window out, craft a new casing/frame, for the new window.  Get that squared and sized, for an easy replacement, when a window can be purchased.  And, then, close that in with plywood inside and out, and insulation.  Why take it out now?  I need to get an ac in there.  I can't handle another year of having it only be cool upstairs.  I... need some cool down here.  I just... I am getting too old.

As well, getting that done would make installing a window a lot easier and faster, when I can afford it.  I would probably need a hand with that.  But, with one window?  Having help, with the casing essentially constructed, and shims on hand, would only be an hour or two.

To that end, I texted someone I know, who might know, if he thinks I could remove the old window, create the casing, and lock it in with plywood in a day, solo.  I just... with the rain, lately, and else, I don't want that left open for any time.  Worst case scenario, I'd at least want tarping reading, in case something didn't work, or went wrong.

If he thinks I could doing it, knowing the work as he does, and me, I'll consider purchasing a few sheets of plywood, and perhaps some 2x4s for structural integrity since I am considering putting in an ac.  Well, that and a large ac.

Ah, decided to check.  Just one place, so far.  It would cost, if ordered today, $574... well, and taxes, title, tags, and the rest of the thievery.  So, what, $650?  Hmm...  Thinking.  No, I can't order it this month.  Oh, and delivery, if ordered today, wouldn't be until Pretty much August.  So... yeah.  If prices will fluctuate hugely, potentially.

Staying around 58 out there, 72 in hear near the computer.  Probably in the 68 range in the rest of the house.  Raining off and on.  Dark, out there.  No worries, I won't be cooking today.  A few kefirs.  I already had a fatted coffee, without sweetening.  That stuff, the sweetener, messes up blood sugar.  I'll, pretty much, fast today and tomorrow.  Maybe another complete fast tomorrow and or the day after.

Having trouble with blood sugar and weight.  So... pushing it.  Will push more, these coming weeks.  Yeah.  I want to snap that blood sugar problem.  Working, and exercise, possibly walking, might help.  Will... see.  Just not sure how safe it is out there for me.  I don't mind dying, I just don't want to be die like roadkill.  Especially on purpose.  Becoming a bit... more attentive to my paranoia, of late.  For... good causes.

Dreams.

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I used to be able to find vids, about off-grid living.  Truth is, I didn't want complete off-grid.  Though, the truth beyond that, is there is no such thing.  You bring water up?  Fine, but SOMEBODY had to create the access to the water.  You need to charge your phone, and battery packs?  SOMEBODY has that electricity, and is allowing you to use it.  Nothing is free.

Still, there are homesteaders who either by need, lack of access, or such, have learned to live lean.  A lot of fiction out there too.  But, between the fiction, and the reality, there are people who truly live a... if not quieter... simpler life.  That has always been a goal.  But, a goal which time and possibility where gone before I ever understood the want.

This fellow, in this video, is... like what I had envisioned?  Only... without realizing the depths.  Not all of them.  Though, does anyone realize how hard things are in life, no matter which direction they go?  I don't think so.  If, truth be absolutely told, there are no easy paths.  And, the honest and true paths are the most brutally difficult.  The world... is jealous, hateful, and doesn't... want you to win.  It will help you lose, but not help you win.  Winning costs.  If too, winning isn't... winning?

Sleep just isn't happening.

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From last night.

Awake.

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Up forty five minutes ago.  Difficulty figuring things out this morning, just running a bit rough.  No, not from the affairs of last night, merely because, is can be the case.  I slept fairly well.  Did more prayers, to manage my end of what happened, and else.  Then let it go, if that all did keep me awake far longer than usual.  Anguish will do that.  Funny how hatred used to not bother me, even after I had let my hatreds go.  I've... become a simpleton.  I... don't mind.  I'm just surprised I have changed that much.  Didn't see that coming.  Thought I'd always be bitter as arsenic laced shoe leather.

When I woke, I checked the temp.  It was 78 at about 14:20?  Or so.  The temp was sure, the time is give or probably add a handful of minutes.  I did spot dark weather to the West.  But hadn't checked if it seemed to be moving, or was just sitting, glaring.  When I realized I hadn't looked for movement, I thought about going out for that.  But, was too tired, and then... just... forgot.

I did a few things.  Fed my furry friend, had my first brb, then checked blood sugar... 202?  Oh well.  It looks like vinegar has done what it may.  Still, that is less than the 360 to over 650 where it usually runs, without interventions and careful eating.  It's as good as it will get, but I will take it.  It's... what I can do.  More fasting?  I suppose.  Definitely intermittent fasting.  And, a few days a month, absolute fasting.  A part of my prayer cycle, as well.  I will do that.  If I can get to exercise, that would help too.

While I was finishing a few things, and getting the internet to work... was fiddly this morning... almost thought they had killed my computer or internet.  Yes, they have that kind of pull.  Bureaucrats, public, private, religious, are all one body, at this point.  They work together for what the government tells them is the common good.  Lethally, if they believe that is correct, and are given said instructions.  Believe as you wish.

Anyway, got it going.  Then... *rumble*  The storm is already overhead.  Further, the temp dropped from 78 to 61 already, or... when I checked after starting this then hearing the rumble.  Cooler yet?  If it rains, maybe.  Wow.  That wasn't hugely fast.  But, when you see something, in place, that big.  Any movement seems fast.  Well, if you have a sleepy head.  But it must have been moving fairly quickly.

On to my day.  I'll... see if I can do a few things.

Better?

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A bit.  More so now that I have chosen a path.  And informed those of the path I will be on.  Still, a bit stressed.  That was intense.

I get that a lot.  Some locals, some at church, family.  What was it, something about someone going to the doctor.  The doctor asking what hurts.  Someone tapping on their shoulder, knee, wrist, and so on.  Saying all these things hurt, terribly.  Right.  The doctor, then suggesting that it is the finger that is broken.  The punchline.

If... you are hated by most you know... the problem must be you.  If you are in hell, this could be a good thing.  Save that, well, you are in hell.  But, if you are the one thing, in hell, hated by all others in hell, besides the general hatred from all in hell to all others?  If you don't hate back, or have hate in your soul?

Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Hatred.

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Not mine.  Felt, sensed, like a punch in the gut.  Absolute hatred.

I have never felt that from someone I have never met before.  Several of them, I think.  But mainly from one man.  A district deputy, for the Knights of Columbus.  Since no one reads here, I write it.  Or... phonetically, as I understood it.  Just to try to let it go... Andy Beck.

I don't think I have ever seen him.  I haven't met him anywhere, seen him, had any involvement with him.  But he sure knows, and absolutely hates, me.

More and more.

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More clouds.  I thought the thing would just grumble, spit and hiss, then pass on by.  The clouds have expanded, taken over more of the sky, and it continues to rain.  Spits and spats, still, drops and drips.  But sometimes big drops.  Very large.  And the temperature has dropped ten degrees, to 67.  Very... nice.

I, myself, could enjoy this weather for the rest of my life.  Not... sustainable.  Crops don't grow well in this cool, dark, damp.  So some sort of wealth would have to exist outside of this place.  Which, to a degree, I have.  Retirement.

Chicken is finishing.  But it isn't up to temp.  I am giving it nearly twenty minutes more.  Just at 350.  I used to put it up to 415~425.  But, being summer, and... not in a hurry, a little lower lately.  Summer?  What is passing for the beginning of summer.  I suppose even 67, compared to the average temp of most of the year here, could be called summer, definitely later spring.  Though, until recently, it would be 80 here, now?  About that.  Though, 76 before the storm... isn't too awfully abnormal either.  Nor is rain this time of year.  Check.  All good, just... strange.

Sure am hungry.  I'll get a fatted coffee going as the chicken finishes.  Then a shower a bit after dinner.  Ugh.

Awake.

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Right at twelve thirty.  If that was over an hour ago.  Not doing all that well.

The world it warming.  It was 76 when I woke.  It is now partly cloudy and 77.  Okay.  A kefir going in.  Blood sugar was 200 fasting, and weight is 260, even.  Nothing is as good as hoped.  But it is another day.  Is this a plateau?  Or... is this the end of better results.  I'll stick with it, it's as good as it gets, so far, without medicine.

I am thinking about having some chicken.  The thing is, I'd have to either microwave it, which I don't like to do.  The fat gets extremely hot, which... is the only time fat is bad for you.  Or I have to turn the oven on, and that will heat up the house.  I only partly cooked the chicken, so while heating it it doesn't overcook.  Would it griddle well?  Maybe.  Meh, I'll just put it in the oven for a bit.

Yes, bedtime, check.

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It's really that time.  Was hoping for one final brb.  Or... did I have one?  Tired and mixed up.  Should just go on to bed, whatever else.  Clear the jars for coffee and kefir tomorrow.  Be ready.  Yes.  Some... music.  Things just... on my mind.  One or two pops lead to... others.

Troubled.  But... finding peace?  I think so.

Blood sugar.

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I was honestly worried it would be a bit high.  Beside the two quarter pound patties, three chicken legs, kefir, and vinegar tonic, I ate an orange and a grapefruit.  Wasn't hungry, more hungry for those.  More worried about the fruit, though the volume too.  Sometimes one or both of those can really bite me on blood sugar.

Two hours after eating I checked.  Almost had kefir before checking again.  But, nope.  At 156, it's not the lowest reading I have taken, but around the second lowest since beginning taking readings?  That is my guess.  It's my only other test for the day, as I messed up and ate kefir and an orange, before realizing I hadn't taken my reading.  All good.

It was warmer through the day.  It is reading between 69 and 73 here in the house, this front room and closer to the computer, is the warmer temp.  Outside it was mostly 69?  I think so.  But it is down to 55 here at nearly midnight thirty.  I think, with it being warmer, I burn more calories.  Which... helps with blood sugar, and maybe weight loss... simply burning more calories offsets food.  Seems logical, and is.  Until it isn't.

Monday, May 15, 2023

A bit more to eat.

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Nothing fancy.  Chicken drumsticks.  I had them going.  But had to wait a bit, as they needed more time.  Then I heard it.  A roaring.  Someone was mowing?  But... where?  It sure seemed close.  So, upon checking, I realized it was my known neighbor.  I was... hoping the chicken would hurry done.  Wasn't sure what to do.

I decided to open the door, and at least waive, in thanks.  but I didn't want to bother him, either.  Not... yet.  I decided to offer him the chicken.  Well, I had more chicken.  But that is only part way done.  These pieces were to be well done, but without being over done... when then hit 175.

I wasn't sure it would be done in time.  So, I just had to wait.  I kept listening.  Sometimes it sounded like he had left?  Then the machine would start up.  On and off it would go.  Perhaps he was getting sticks out of the way?  Which... is why I haven't mowed yet.  I... was just praying the chicken would be done in time.

Kefir and burgers.

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Patties, anyway.  A small collection of sliced mushrooms, cooked in better.  Smash burgers, with cheese, onion, and serrano and jalapeno peppers... the latter three sliced, the latter two kept seeds in.  It's the only way for me to have a bit of a taste.  If I see habanero, scottish bonnet, carolina reapers, or such, I may just pick up a few.  I... like it a bit spicier.

Finished.  Happily.  Not too full, not yet hungry.  I'll make a vinegar tonic and consume that.  Water, next.  For the rest of the day.  Trying to run on this.  Will see if it is enough to, before long, get to some work.  The kitchen drain is plugged, has been for a week.  The rest is running well.  Dishes too.  But... I want to shower before dishes, if I don't want to shower until I have sorted out the kitchen drain.  That will most likely be messy.

All good.  It is getting. warm.  But that make functioning a bit easier.  If it is going to begin hitting 70 out there, or higher... which is likely?  I need to capture the cool in the morning, then shut the house up.  Trying to keep it to 70 or less, as possible.  As well, I may need to put the air on upstairs.  Or at least in.  If I go up there, and it is 73 or higher, I need to run it or I won't sleep.  Maybe just the fan(s), if I can go to bed at night.  Ugh.  It's just the way it is.

Sleep is still bad.  It felt better, last night.  But... hmm?  I guess it did score better, at 74.  That's only a C, people.  So not great.  Just so much better than the 30s and 40s!  Anyway, so, yes, sleep was better for reasons I can't know or tell you.  That has to get better.  At least, with the watch, I have some idea of what might be the problem.  When you get an F for a night's sleep, that can... be worked past.  When you do that for a week, shit starts falling apart.  And, yes, for probably seven of the last eight to ten days my sleep has been abysmal.  A single C night will no recover that.  But it is a start.  It might allow me to eat, digest, burn calories, do some work, and begin the upward cycle.  The Lord knows, while I will have to one day drown as I leave this world, until then I mean to climb.  Dig, right out of my grave.  And, I will... as I may.  Even, sometimes, beyond any reasonable means.  So be it.

Yea.  Vinegar tonic, the sink drain tended, a shower, then setting up dishes.  Oh, I may roast chicken legs, to be griddle finished tomorrow... some of them.  Yum.  Sounds good to me.  Wish me luck?  Or, better yet, say a little prayer to God.  That I may be able to work, burn off some energy, get things done.  These things I do in His name anyway.  Believe as you will, but I tell you the truth.  All good deeds are in His name, as we are not good without Him.  Amen.

Trending well.

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Blood sugar is 185 fasting.  Not the absolute best, but good and better than yesterday.  Maybe better than the day before.  But the weekly average is 184, biweekly is 190, and month average is 215.  Fifteen points, I believe, better than my last best average.  It is still going down, just not as quickly.  One day, measurement, thing, at a time.

I called off the potential pizza run.  Look, I am doing really well.  With what I eat, what I consume with meals, my numbers.  I just don't want to mess it up.  I even took a day of fasting, completely, yesterday.  Blood sugar was too high.  If it refuses to come down, when I do the right things?  I'll up and stop eating.  

I have plenty of stored fat.  A "skinny" human, at 150 average weight?  Has 100k extra calories stored on his body.  At 3k caloric burn a day, for said man, that means he has about a month of food on his carcass, for incidents and accidents.  He won't be able to burn too many calories for too many days, but he can put out more than most would think, and for longer.  I have an extra forty to sixty pounds.  Each pound is about 4.1k calories.  So, sixty time 4k is 240k calories.

Up very late.

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Between warmth, turning the furnace on... sleeping so late into the morning... to past noon to beyond morning... then with the nap?  Aye, but I needed sleep.  Still do.  I am sleep deprived, from a week of fighting, and losing.  I will, for a while, sleep as much, and when, felt... needed.

Blood sugar is 147.  Not fasting, even if I have been fasting.  Literally, not... in some... sort of pseudo fasting.  Without food.  Water, coffee, tea if I wanted that.  So far just water, and one coffee.  I tested four hours ago.  It popped down to 160.  Did I write about that?  I think so.  Four hours?  A... goodly bit ago, two to eight maybe?  Too tired to remember well.

On to bed, shortly.

A nerve?

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I... can strike those.  Do I mean to?  What do you think?

Who is there?

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She?  I think so.  I... may have forgotten.  She yet has access.  I just didn't think... well... I did suspect.  Saw no... clear evidence.  Until now?  Maybe.

Sunday, May 14, 2023

Such dreams.

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Believe?  Who... needs belief.  Always.  Dreams are their own.

Why?  Do they come though, at times.  I don't know.  Rarer, these days.  Beautiful, in their terror.  If you have learned to accept, humbly, that which must be... with or without you?  You... can walk on, in, through.  With hope, faith, and charity.  I don't embrace horror, I just... understand it well enough to... walk beside it, through it, in it.  Even be the face of it, at times.

The power by which it presents?  Only in rare moments am I brought to tears.  Certain memories, faces.  None real, of course.  For I never was.  No One.  I simply wasn't there, didn't do those things, didn't see those things, or such.  Just dreams, or... as it is said.  I dream 23 men women and children were logged to my name.  More, probably many more, but... not all things can be accounted in war, let alone mere dreams of war.  And, not even I can be certain about the number.

As I dream, so I paint, with music, and even some art.  Go away.

That was a drop.

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A nap.  A long one.  Needed.  Still tired.  I didn't have the door open to the upstairs.  The downstairs was closed up and the furnace was set to 72.  So, was warm when I came down.  It was about 62 to 64 upstairs.  Wind would come through, and when it was raining is was cooler as well.  I may shut windows when I go to bed next.

Oh, right.  Blood sugar...  It was 205 fasting, this morning.  Then 204 later, before the nap.  Now it is 160.  Not... sure how it rises so high.  I only ate one meal yesterday.  But that was eaten later.  It was only meat, sauerkraut, cheese, and mushrooms, and really not that much.  Probably two thirds of a pound altogether?  And, all very keto.  Hmm.  Oh, and weight is 257.6.  I am really jumping, from day to day.

Why it fell forty four points through a nap and a bit more waking I can't be certain.  It did surprise me.  I did have a bottle or two of water, and will have another.  I may also have a fatted coffee, with collagen.  While the collagen only offers about fifteen percent of it's protein, that... isn't the whole reason to consume it.  The collagen, itself, is the major part.  Does it help?  I don't know.  I just add it from time to time, while eating less, these days.  As well, it is used in some keto recipes so I keep it on hand.  But, no more daily dailies of the stuff.

So tired.

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I did close up shop, and turn the furnace on.  Still not feeling all that better.  A nap?  Maybe.

Closing in on 16:00.  It rained, for a bit, out there.  I think it stopped.  At least for the moment.

A few old songs were seen, then heard.  This one... brings this spring to mind.

Up around noon thirty?

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Give or take.  It's nearly 14:00.  Barely going even so.  Tired.

It was 62 outdoors when I woke, 64 indoors.  The front room is up to 67, near the computer.  But the rest of the house is 64 and the outdoors has dropped a degree, and it's threatening to rain.  Looks like it sprinkled, just a bit ago.  Even when the hygrometer reads high humidity (70 to 100 percent, rare as that is), between the thirst of the ground and environment, drops don't stay on the ground long, or visibly.  So, had to have been very recently.

Two bm's already?  One last night.  Still, I think I'll go light on food today.  I'm just not burning much energy.  My watch suggests that I burn around 3500 on a slow day, up to 6500 on a heavier day.  I can't... guarantee those numbers.  But I can say the trend is very much correct.  It's too cool for me to push into heavier efforts.  Barely dragging through the day, just sitting.