Time and a few things.

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It may not be as quickly as I had thought.  I will be ending my association with gab soon.  I'm not a good fit.  It has been "new".  It is addictive.  But it doesn't really add anything.  Socializing with complete strangers.  I suppose some sort of relationship is created.  Just as often someone who is ignorant, none too bright, or just a jerk, is on the other end.  Mocking, but as leftists do.  They never really do just say they don't like what you said or your music.  They actually do just the opposite.  It's difficult to tell what you are dealing with, probably ever.  Snark doesn't do well online.  No tells.

How much longer I will stay is sort of up in the air.  I'd like to wait for Trump's inauguration and first hundred days.  There is some good info, from time to time, there.  If too, there is a lot of junk-false news.  Or just the loony bin stuff.  I am so itching to leave.  It is just a matter of time.

Then, sometime... perhaps before, maybe after, I will end blogging.  I don't know if I should kill the blog, but I am thinking that is probably right.  Between youtube and blogger, the older posts, especially with music, are falling apart.  I really can't keep up on them.  Every once in a while, if I track a hit back, I'll try to fix a page.  But it's... too much work, and not always possible anyway.  Yeah, best to just take it down.  Probably.

I don't know that I'll be able to get to anything more.  Maybe.  The future will just have to be what it is, when it comes, as those things happen.  Yeah... I'm giving you fair warning.  The day is coming.

Good night, Mr. Leonard Cohen.

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Nothing I could say would properly express his life or the learning and joy I gained from it.  A few of my favored pieces.  How best to celebrate some special individuals?  With their own works.  Rest in peace.  A prayer for the resolve of your soul is in the works.

Wonderful.

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Wonderful headache.  Oh, and a bit of nausea.  Wonderfully messed up body.  Wonderfully missed appointment.  I think I can manage the headache.  It isn't a migraine, but is enough offputting I will attempt to treat it.

I changed my doctor appointment to today.  I was awake.  I knew it was coming.  I tracked the time, and... time blew right past it, with me in tow.  How do you drop two to three hours.  Well, it means I'm still doing poorly.  I used to drop weeks, so...  A few hours is what it is.  I just wish it hadn't been today.  Nothing to do but keep at it.  I won't bother making another appointment until I am clear of this psychic... and physical... muck.  Fog?  Fogue.

I'll just... I don't know.  I am hoping to break through before long... or settle in for a long winter of mostly sleeping.  I've been seriously off my feedbag as well.  Which is fine.  I have been meaning to fast, at least daily, for a while.  I am there, I think, or more.  Which also means I need to be getting the potassium in.  Ugh.  There is always something.

Just checking in.  I am just awake.  Days and nights might have shifted back aright, but with the winter darkening, it almost doesn't make a difference.  All good anyway.  Good day, and morning.

Hmm, so it is.

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I tried to stay up later yesterday, to see if Florida, at least, would get called.  I simply ran out of energy.  I left the machine on, so I could easily check if I woke, then go on back to bed hopefully.  I did wake.  Not having to fuss with getting the machine functioning, I hoped I could go back to sleep right away.  That simply didn't work out.  Everything was up in the air, but in a much more potentially positive manner than...

Look.  I didn't think he would win.  I wanted him to win.  I shilled for him, without compensation.  I took some hits for him.  And I hit at him.  It's my way.  Friend or foe, blows of some sort will happen.  Not always, as with Mr... president... Trump.  Testing the tires.  It is how my kind do.  I actually avoid physical, and have for some time, if that wasn't always, even so, my choice.  Sometimes one would step up to champion, sometimes my claims went unanswered.  I am simply not afraid of asking hard questions, serious questions, to me.

To my mind, even so, he held up well.  Not so all of his champions.  But, then... most people, not even men, should step up when I am at bat.  I don't play to be civil, I play for blood.  I mean to win, even if playing the devil's advocate.  If you want gentility, go to the lady's knit club.  Uhrm, or... not.  Depends on the bloody mood of the brood.  Go play softball with the girls.  They might play for blood, but they don't have that much to offer that way.  I'll make you legless, freefalling in gravity, then further slam you even faster on your way down, just to see if you can take it.  As I said, he did well, not so all his champions.  What a pussy world this has become, and that's many of the men.

So, I stayed up, and watched.  None of the sites offering information could be trusted, by me.  I was not going to open cookies for the NYTimes, or abccbscnbcnbccnn or any of them.  So I had to get what news I could from others, on gab.  Every station, to me including fox, seemed to be shilling for Hillary.  All night.  Even when they realized they had no chance, they still tried to push her way.  Last I heard they were trying to suggest she won the popular vote.  Which... I doubt.  Wonderful.  I had, days ago, in spite of my doubts, bet he would get 305 or better.  I'm still not sure if he got there, or yet.

As a return favor, I called my mother this morning.  I wasn't sure which way she have voted.  She was cheery yesterday, though that could go either way with her.  I was just as cheery this morning.  Hi.  Good morn.  Sleep well?  *chitter chatter*  Oh?  Did you know your man won?  *dead silence*  Who, Trump.  Uhm-hum.  This and that.  Well, she was a woman.  Still is, as are over half the people in the nation.  I knew, then, who she was with.  You know, with over half the population female, and them have the vote since... 1919, or maybe effectively 1920... and we haven't had a woman president?  Just the history of women, and how they voted, should tell something.  But, nooooo.  Then again, this wasn't even close.  I'm curious to see if this was a Reaganesque beat-down or a little less.  It was harsh.

Still, favor returned.  She was so chipper and smug yesterday.  Wonderful.  You know though?  I should have told her Hillary won.  Oh... the schadenfreude when she heard otherwise.  Gosh... maybe next time.  Not sure if I can get back to sleep any time soon, or if I will simply try to push through the day.  Ugh...  I'm doing okay so far.  But I know I am running on vapors.  Later or... much later.

Okay, changes.

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Small things, yesterday.  More today?  Maybe.

My mother called this morning.  Just a check-in and flyby.  Well, and an election jab.  It's how my family 'do'.  It doesn't matter which side of things.  If they know which side you are most likely on, they'll poke you in the eye with it.  Not too poignantly, just enough to see if you still have reflexes.  I just laughed.

She said my brother has been calling, has left messages.  I haven't received any calls or messages.  Unless his numbers have changed I have him programmed in, both home and cell.  I couldn't call him right then, too early.  I did try a bit ago.  He didn't answer.  I didn't want to call his cell, that would more likely have meant he was out, perhaps voting?  Anyway, there is that.

Another shower today, I think.  I will cook food, a bit.  I did make a bowl of popcorn.  Plenty of butter.  I simply can't, really, taste food.  I haven't been able to for a bit.  I try to eat anyway.  I'm not sure what the deal is.  No major issue, I have had this happen before.  Not hungry, so it's not too much of an issue.  I guess I really didn't need the gum to begin fasting again.  Still, it might help when I hit a snag.  I have enough for a small gum stand and a larger event.  I may make a few burgers in a bit...  Without bread I'll just add some ranch dressing, maybe melt cheese on top as it finishes.

Yeah.  Another shower.  Perhaps some work if I can get to it.  And an attempt to push through the day.  It's not dark today.  I don't need the curtains open to sense it.  I can even enjoy it, as sensitive as I am, in what you might consider blackout conditions.  Yeah... I'm... that sort.  Oh, sometimes I am better, and enjoy going out.  And a woman might create inducements... one way or the other.  Love em', hate em', or a bit of both... but they sure get their men to... become more active.  *grins*

Later.

Life?

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I felt as if something improved.  Health returned.  For a moment, just a sensation, will it lead to anything more?  I don't know.  On top of that, I dreamed of cleaning my closet, moving to the spare bedroom for a bit, and finishing off my main bedroom on out from the closet.  Time will tell.

I have been a bit frozen lately.  Night and day have been confused.  Often having several sleep and wake cycles each day, and before that some time back, more like having a day last two actual days, if sleep was more normal.  Just the season.  I haven't been keeping up on food or medicine well.  Even so, I may begin carvedilol this week... if I can find it, then load it into the dispenser.

I have a powerful itch to begin cleaning.  We'll see.  Later.

Black Friday?

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Most of my life I have ignored the big sale days.  I always suspected that, for all the rush, mostly what was offered was merchandise... I wouldn't want if they gave it to me.  Last year I did a minor search of what was offered, I think the year before too.  I didn't write about it.  I wasn't sure if the failure was mine or if it was correct.  As the third year rolls around, and I suppose some skill improvement has occurred, I'll give it one more shot.  So far, what I am seeing, is the clearance of merchandise that isn't selling anymore.  Dated, shown to be defective or ineffective, or just out of style.  Even the things that are put on really cheap, limited number sales, have seemed to be low end, really out of date things... like big screen televisions of a brand I wouldn't buy.  If I wouldn't buy it at ~$400, why would I buy it at ~$99?  Not good enough doesn't become better when it is offered for less.  And, most such can't be returned.  You won't even have that as a minor backup.

Clearance of items which won't sell any other way.  That is what most of these sales bring to mind.  Cheap stuff made even cheaper.  As I said, it just doesn't work for me.  Now... if there is a minor niche to fill, or a rather specific item you had already been seeking, that comes up?  Sure.  I just haven't seen a thing I would buy, so far.  I'll look, again, this year.  Urhm, no... I won't do the store thing.  That is insanity.  And for lesser deals even then, from what ads have shown.

If someone can advise me about what I might be doing wrong, I'll listen.  I won't even argue back.  I'll give it a go.  Just... trying to find a way to save some money.  But on things I really would like to buy.  *shrug*  Later.