.
.
Weird. I was just... living. Tinkering online, window shopping, placing a minor order, reading, and all when I noticed it didn't hurt. Probably not the anacin, or not all. Unless that takes six hours to work fully? No. Some of the pain must just have lifted. Though perhaps the pills started the change. I can never be sure. There is still some serious pain that I can't feel. Oh, just trust me. Sometimes there is a type of feverishness when that is in play, and that is happening now. Still, it's better to have even a lot of unfelt than have that and a bunch of felt and suffered. I think even that has diminished.
After years of wanting one, I finally ordered a decent set of headphones. There is a thing called diminishing returns, and yet there is something about having to pay for quality. Between this and that, there is something that falls into any particular humans affordability factor. What for me would be less, or right, or a luxury beyond the pale is quite different than yours or anyone else. What even to buy? Headphones, do you really, honestly, need them? No. Nor do you need books, television or movies, fashion, or much else. Crazy, if you ever really stop to think about what you literally need, what you can live with, and what is fair beyond that. There isn't a single answer. Ask a monk or nun, ask a high school aged child, ask a married woman, a single adult male, your grandfather, or my great grandmother. And, sometimes, even when unseemly or seemingly too sparse, none of them are completely wrong. Efficiency comes with time, but who has time? No, youngling, not even immortals of flesh have enough time. And the true God is outside of time, so it is not a concern to Him. Just... trust me.
Do you enjoy the story being woven in? It is, you are sure, just a story. So don't worry, just play as you are comfortable. Also refuse to believe your parents' were never intimate despite your existence. *grins* Oh, no worries here. I understand some things, limits, notions, should not be disturbed. Still, the question stands, do you like the story woven right into the... urhm... story... or not?
I almost thought I might make it into town, after realizing I feel so much better. Yeah... no. Not even going to happen. I really could use milk, cream, butter, and some other odds and ends. I just can't get going. I am sputtering back to health, even if with pain and that haggard near-death expression which make covering mirrors, on some days, seem wise. The targets I ordered should be in Wednesday, though who knows when. So, I am hoping to get out by Thursday. Actually I am hoping to get out before then, just to work up to being out again. Though Thursday should be a hard certainty to be out. I hope. Then again I might surprise myself, see a window, and scamper through it to town.
Ah, the razor is in, the cross between a straight and a safety razor. I can split normal safety razors, and put them in. Though it came with 100 blades custom made for these types of razors. I am hoping to begin practicing with this. My beard had grown out since I have been down. I have an electric razor for that. I suppose I could just shove the blade through, but that really is no fun when there is an option. I don't care who tells you what, if you have a forest on your face, stick with a chainsaw, skip the axe. Yeah, I'll have to get used to that, more since I do still fall from time to time. But I don't have to start out the process of learning this blade that way! And I won't!
Whatever. It's just good to feel human, alive, and pretty much consciously pain free for a bit and again. Now get your butt off my porch! Was that rude? *smile* Just trying to cheer me, aren't you? Thanks. Now scoot.
Saturday, September 12, 2015
A bit better.
.
.
I know there is pain under there, beside the crushing pain I am feeling. All good. I think I am feeling the least of it. I am quite grateful, and of body gifted, in mitigating pain. I am also, somehow, a master at attracting, finding, creating, developing pain. Most of this is of body. The only reason I feel the horrendous muscle and bone pain is because whatever else is hurting is using up a ton of my anti-pain mojo. This is enough pain to make breathing shallow, what I consciously feel. The whole of it, if I had to lay money on it, would put the average person into shock. Maybe just what I feel consciously. What I do feel would certainly take the average person out and down. You don't have to believe me. Some day, though, you will know. All things, in time, will be known. All things. And in a place where truth cannot be denied. This truth, or your rejection of it, is so far down the list of things that you will learn that it is essentially inconsequential. Just telling you in advance though. Each truth denied, when understood, will be like a little sting. Only your faith in Christ, if you have it, will spare you just deserts. You will suffer each. If warned, however, you have a chance of... relaxing your grip. One even just one lie you believe, you will be grateful. Oh, yes, I will go through the same thing myself, if I make it out of shadows as a shadow. That isn't your problem though. If your own are serious enough.
Anacin is helping a bit. I am a bit surprised though. I thought it would take care of most of it. The pain must be much more intense, both conscious and unconscious. As horrible as I feel, I still think I can do a few things. To be honest, being in pain is much better than being in thick psychic fog, buried away from pain by a needful overdose of natural pain killers and an inability to hold on to reality. Trust me. Especially when no matter how bad or deep, one cannot seem to die. Now THAT can drive someone insane. I guess I was just too stubborn for even that. Stubborn, sure, but not insane. At worst just in a twilight of pain mitigation. But that is rare. I would even say those days are gone. My heart is working just enough better that I don't fog out, almost ever. A drift, from time to time, but still functional in absolute need. As ill as I have been, for example, I still was able to make an appointment, get to it, tend my cats, generally keep up on life, if food is slipping. At my absolute worst, currently, I am doing as well as I was doing in engineering school, on special medication, only sans special medication. Just 5% improvement in my heart, maybe a bit more now, and I am alive most of the time. I rarely approach death and never enter that impossible maze of fog.
I hope to finish the dishes. They just sit there. And fold and put up, and use, the towels. Perhaps do more laundry. And hit the kitchen as I may. I had hoped to get out but that just isn't going to happen. It took everything I had, plus a compromise, to make it to the post box. Getting to town is a bit off. I did, finally, just order the target system I was hoping to price check. Nothing fancy. Large enough for a 1,000 yard shot yet small enough for pistol work at 15 paces. Few believe us mostly dead can do much. Truth is, if you want, I'll be your Huckleberry.
Hmm... I'll give the anacin a bit longer to work, watch a video, play a game if I can handle it, and aim to work or more sleep, whichever has to happen. If I can work I'll get to it. Later.
.
I know there is pain under there, beside the crushing pain I am feeling. All good. I think I am feeling the least of it. I am quite grateful, and of body gifted, in mitigating pain. I am also, somehow, a master at attracting, finding, creating, developing pain. Most of this is of body. The only reason I feel the horrendous muscle and bone pain is because whatever else is hurting is using up a ton of my anti-pain mojo. This is enough pain to make breathing shallow, what I consciously feel. The whole of it, if I had to lay money on it, would put the average person into shock. Maybe just what I feel consciously. What I do feel would certainly take the average person out and down. You don't have to believe me. Some day, though, you will know. All things, in time, will be known. All things. And in a place where truth cannot be denied. This truth, or your rejection of it, is so far down the list of things that you will learn that it is essentially inconsequential. Just telling you in advance though. Each truth denied, when understood, will be like a little sting. Only your faith in Christ, if you have it, will spare you just deserts. You will suffer each. If warned, however, you have a chance of... relaxing your grip. One even just one lie you believe, you will be grateful. Oh, yes, I will go through the same thing myself, if I make it out of shadows as a shadow. That isn't your problem though. If your own are serious enough.
Anacin is helping a bit. I am a bit surprised though. I thought it would take care of most of it. The pain must be much more intense, both conscious and unconscious. As horrible as I feel, I still think I can do a few things. To be honest, being in pain is much better than being in thick psychic fog, buried away from pain by a needful overdose of natural pain killers and an inability to hold on to reality. Trust me. Especially when no matter how bad or deep, one cannot seem to die. Now THAT can drive someone insane. I guess I was just too stubborn for even that. Stubborn, sure, but not insane. At worst just in a twilight of pain mitigation. But that is rare. I would even say those days are gone. My heart is working just enough better that I don't fog out, almost ever. A drift, from time to time, but still functional in absolute need. As ill as I have been, for example, I still was able to make an appointment, get to it, tend my cats, generally keep up on life, if food is slipping. At my absolute worst, currently, I am doing as well as I was doing in engineering school, on special medication, only sans special medication. Just 5% improvement in my heart, maybe a bit more now, and I am alive most of the time. I rarely approach death and never enter that impossible maze of fog.
I hope to finish the dishes. They just sit there. And fold and put up, and use, the towels. Perhaps do more laundry. And hit the kitchen as I may. I had hoped to get out but that just isn't going to happen. It took everything I had, plus a compromise, to make it to the post box. Getting to town is a bit off. I did, finally, just order the target system I was hoping to price check. Nothing fancy. Large enough for a 1,000 yard shot yet small enough for pistol work at 15 paces. Few believe us mostly dead can do much. Truth is, if you want, I'll be your Huckleberry.
Hmm... I'll give the anacin a bit longer to work, watch a video, play a game if I can handle it, and aim to work or more sleep, whichever has to happen. If I can work I'll get to it. Later.
Not so good this morning.
.
.
Morning? Well, when I wake up, I call that morning. It's a submariner thing too, you know? Even with the ac on, yeah I still need that, I had blown off so much heat and burned the oxygen out of the room, that for a start I woke with a slight headache. There should be enough air flow in my room, and usually that is true. Sometimes, like last night, I must eat oxygen like an old train boiler ate coal. And with the similar result of creating massive amounts of heat and steam. It was sweltering in there, when I woke, with the ac set on 62 and an large fan running at top speed as well. Anacin, I do believe.
I have been doing very small little jobs, besides what I have told. Sometimes for their own reasons, sometimes in conjunction with other things. Like beginning to clear the kitchen in order to find the glucose tester. I've been looking for a while. If I can't find it soon, I may have to buy a few. Walmart sells them, 50 tests for $20. I could ask the V.A., but I am not sure... First they sent me strips, but without a device that allowed it to read, then I asked and they sent strips with them, but now I can't find the device. Their fault, my fault, no one's fault... enough failures and I just back off and try a different way. At least they didn't call me a liar this last mistake time. Tired, this doesn't help. Oh, I am sure they try. As do I. For what, sometimes, it is worth.
My doc called tod... yest... Friday. My blood sugar was at 560(ish), but the a1c was at 9.5(ish), which means my three month average was in the 230~50 range (which actually means lower before I cut back, given as high as it is and has been since I halved insulin). He also suggested my cholesterol is high, but that may be a dysfunction of such high blood sugars. Well, know he might believe my tall tale of having had 600< blood sugars for over six months on several occasions. Anyway, even if cholesterol is a problem I will not medicate that. Medication, for that, from all I have read, is worse than the disease. I don't believe doctors on all things, that is one where they have it wrong. I hope it comes down, so he doesn't nag, but I won't take poison to fix something that seems to be... unfixable. Set up an appointment next month.
I have been pining to get to town for some shopping for a bit. I sort of gave up on that for a while. Increasing insulin is brutal, sometimes. Even when it makes things better, like the last few days, there isn't much to work with. Simply little energy. Still, things, even when rough, are improved. There are two types of crashing in my life. Crashing out of, and into, health. Both hurt. Both take time. I have learned to know which way I am headed, even if I can't do much about it, or the speed of it, or such. I am crashing into health. I probably should have raised insulin more slowly. Then again, that just stretches out the agony, when there is pain. This time there is, sometimes, lots of it. I am getting breathers, from time to time. All good. It really does make the bad days more tolerable.
On to something or other, and waking. Later.
.
Morning? Well, when I wake up, I call that morning. It's a submariner thing too, you know? Even with the ac on, yeah I still need that, I had blown off so much heat and burned the oxygen out of the room, that for a start I woke with a slight headache. There should be enough air flow in my room, and usually that is true. Sometimes, like last night, I must eat oxygen like an old train boiler ate coal. And with the similar result of creating massive amounts of heat and steam. It was sweltering in there, when I woke, with the ac set on 62 and an large fan running at top speed as well. Anacin, I do believe.
I have been doing very small little jobs, besides what I have told. Sometimes for their own reasons, sometimes in conjunction with other things. Like beginning to clear the kitchen in order to find the glucose tester. I've been looking for a while. If I can't find it soon, I may have to buy a few. Walmart sells them, 50 tests for $20. I could ask the V.A., but I am not sure... First they sent me strips, but without a device that allowed it to read, then I asked and they sent strips with them, but now I can't find the device. Their fault, my fault, no one's fault... enough failures and I just back off and try a different way. At least they didn't call me a liar this last mistake time. Tired, this doesn't help. Oh, I am sure they try. As do I. For what, sometimes, it is worth.
My doc called tod... yest... Friday. My blood sugar was at 560(ish), but the a1c was at 9.5(ish), which means my three month average was in the 230~50 range (which actually means lower before I cut back, given as high as it is and has been since I halved insulin). He also suggested my cholesterol is high, but that may be a dysfunction of such high blood sugars. Well, know he might believe my tall tale of having had 600< blood sugars for over six months on several occasions. Anyway, even if cholesterol is a problem I will not medicate that. Medication, for that, from all I have read, is worse than the disease. I don't believe doctors on all things, that is one where they have it wrong. I hope it comes down, so he doesn't nag, but I won't take poison to fix something that seems to be... unfixable. Set up an appointment next month.
I have been pining to get to town for some shopping for a bit. I sort of gave up on that for a while. Increasing insulin is brutal, sometimes. Even when it makes things better, like the last few days, there isn't much to work with. Simply little energy. Still, things, even when rough, are improved. There are two types of crashing in my life. Crashing out of, and into, health. Both hurt. Both take time. I have learned to know which way I am headed, even if I can't do much about it, or the speed of it, or such. I am crashing into health. I probably should have raised insulin more slowly. Then again, that just stretches out the agony, when there is pain. This time there is, sometimes, lots of it. I am getting breathers, from time to time. All good. It really does make the bad days more tolerable.
On to something or other, and waking. Later.
Friday, September 11, 2015
Not bad, boys and girls.
.
.
I am simply feeling better. Psychic cohesion comes and goes. As with a pendulum, the stopped position being preferable by comparison and analogy in this case, each swing brings me closer to a better situation. When it stops, and I rest and repair, I will then... you guessed it, send the mass swinging again. Only this time, perhaps, it will be used for productive efforts, not just mere survival. Better, yes, much... and improving. Oh, certainly, I thank God both vocally and quietly, now and then. No, I don't thank God for easing my pain. I suffer with a gladness. No, I think God for, as I heal, the opportunity to do other works. Grateful, true, but pain relief and health isn't the point. Given all the givens and how little that really means in my case, mind you. No, no grump in there, at all. It's just good to shift efforts from time to time.
I cooked the local quinoa. I did it just by itself, as I wanted to test this quinoa alone, to know if it is good enough. It is. It is grown in Idaho, strangely. Like I said, it is gray, not golden. I could see how, if you are used to this or that, the color might be offputting. I just don't generally have much of a weakness to that sort of thing. It tastes just as good. It is slightly, but just slightly, cheaper. I would like to get a bag of that for storage. I want to see how long a bag will last, then check shelf-life. If it lasts two years, which I don't think it does, even when sealed and with an oxygen absorber, then I could buy one or two twenty five pound bags. This stuff is excellent eating. Oh, but I don't think I will soak it anymore. I will soak the 9-grain, whole rice, lentils and other beans. I found out what gets so mushy in doing this on it's own. Quinoa really gets startchy or... something like it. Much like sticky rice. Too much. Maybe because it is a seed? Anyway. That's fine. I'll soak the others and then just rinse/wash quinoa, then cook it all together. It's not horrible this gooey, it just isn't my favorite. I like quinoa with a bit more bite. I like all of it with a bit more bite, but the rest of it has that even after soaking.
I ought to get dishes finished. Just a few to dry and fewer to wash. The towels are more than ready. Then a bath. My feet are heading toward good. It's still off and on. But between the soaking, scrubbing, and slathering, they are improving. It was getting so bad that just standing took contortions just to not writhe in pain. I bet, at the doc's office, they didn't even notice. I am good at hiding extraordinary pain. And I was most definitely in it, save when seated.
Loverly, boys and girls. Ah, for your... good behavior?
.
I am simply feeling better. Psychic cohesion comes and goes. As with a pendulum, the stopped position being preferable by comparison and analogy in this case, each swing brings me closer to a better situation. When it stops, and I rest and repair, I will then... you guessed it, send the mass swinging again. Only this time, perhaps, it will be used for productive efforts, not just mere survival. Better, yes, much... and improving. Oh, certainly, I thank God both vocally and quietly, now and then. No, I don't thank God for easing my pain. I suffer with a gladness. No, I think God for, as I heal, the opportunity to do other works. Grateful, true, but pain relief and health isn't the point. Given all the givens and how little that really means in my case, mind you. No, no grump in there, at all. It's just good to shift efforts from time to time.
I cooked the local quinoa. I did it just by itself, as I wanted to test this quinoa alone, to know if it is good enough. It is. It is grown in Idaho, strangely. Like I said, it is gray, not golden. I could see how, if you are used to this or that, the color might be offputting. I just don't generally have much of a weakness to that sort of thing. It tastes just as good. It is slightly, but just slightly, cheaper. I would like to get a bag of that for storage. I want to see how long a bag will last, then check shelf-life. If it lasts two years, which I don't think it does, even when sealed and with an oxygen absorber, then I could buy one or two twenty five pound bags. This stuff is excellent eating. Oh, but I don't think I will soak it anymore. I will soak the 9-grain, whole rice, lentils and other beans. I found out what gets so mushy in doing this on it's own. Quinoa really gets startchy or... something like it. Much like sticky rice. Too much. Maybe because it is a seed? Anyway. That's fine. I'll soak the others and then just rinse/wash quinoa, then cook it all together. It's not horrible this gooey, it just isn't my favorite. I like quinoa with a bit more bite. I like all of it with a bit more bite, but the rest of it has that even after soaking.
I ought to get dishes finished. Just a few to dry and fewer to wash. The towels are more than ready. Then a bath. My feet are heading toward good. It's still off and on. But between the soaking, scrubbing, and slathering, they are improving. It was getting so bad that just standing took contortions just to not writhe in pain. I bet, at the doc's office, they didn't even notice. I am good at hiding extraordinary pain. And I was most definitely in it, save when seated.
Loverly, boys and girls. Ah, for your... good behavior?
Right sleep and waking is wonderful.
.
.
Oh, I'm still in harsh condition. Slight pains and fog remain, if those are lessening. I was awake a full, and more, day yesterday. I am getting back to literal days. Oh, sure, it doesn't completely matter. It's more of an attempt to live in the world of men, as much as one as I can. As well, I slept a proper length of time this evening. Waking without help. My days and nights are still canted, a shift off really. Improving.
Everything is improving. I grilled chicken thighs yesterday... I think? I have been soaking quinoa, fermenting it really. A little long on that, but it should be ready. This is a type grown more locally, and less expensive. It isn't golden, more like a gray. I will taste it to see if it will do. I am hoping to get a batch of that, as well as spelt and hard white wheat, now that I have the grinder. With the materials and equipment on hand, when the opportunity presents I can just get to it. I probably need some sifting grates as well. I'll have to do research on grates to see what is generally, seemingly, preferred. Plus, having everything in play will offer incentive to getting my kitchen back in order. The first thing I want to do is to begin a sourdough.
My fridge really does need cleaned out. But even if that were to happen, if legitimately now and more so in the future, it is starting too look like Frankenstein's refrigerator. Stuff bubbling here, and there, and over there. Righteous mostrous food prep! *grins* I am hoping, over time, to have little oddities here and there. Sauerkraut to pickles, sprouting grains and seeds to fermented grains and seeds, perhaps even aging beef, making pestrami and true dry salami. If I can't work, I should at least try to make myself useful. Since I can't even do daily~daily in a guaranteed manner, I might as well attempt to specialize in mid-term food and project efforts.
I am hoping to get a bath before my morning turns into a dawn. Between soaking and slathering I am hoping my feet will get better quickly. Much is improving, quickly and well. But much was wrong, and in really bad shape. A bath, more pumice stone, more slathering, a shave, and then in to town for some shopping and price comparing. Right... After this I will compare prices, tossing shipping into the equation, so I can compare apples to apples. Who cares if you get a 10% cheaper price, only to pay 25% more due to shipping and handling! I'm not the best with numbers, or tending them anyway, but I really try... when I can. Later.
.
Oh, I'm still in harsh condition. Slight pains and fog remain, if those are lessening. I was awake a full, and more, day yesterday. I am getting back to literal days. Oh, sure, it doesn't completely matter. It's more of an attempt to live in the world of men, as much as one as I can. As well, I slept a proper length of time this evening. Waking without help. My days and nights are still canted, a shift off really. Improving.
Everything is improving. I grilled chicken thighs yesterday... I think? I have been soaking quinoa, fermenting it really. A little long on that, but it should be ready. This is a type grown more locally, and less expensive. It isn't golden, more like a gray. I will taste it to see if it will do. I am hoping to get a batch of that, as well as spelt and hard white wheat, now that I have the grinder. With the materials and equipment on hand, when the opportunity presents I can just get to it. I probably need some sifting grates as well. I'll have to do research on grates to see what is generally, seemingly, preferred. Plus, having everything in play will offer incentive to getting my kitchen back in order. The first thing I want to do is to begin a sourdough.
My fridge really does need cleaned out. But even if that were to happen, if legitimately now and more so in the future, it is starting too look like Frankenstein's refrigerator. Stuff bubbling here, and there, and over there. Righteous mostrous food prep! *grins* I am hoping, over time, to have little oddities here and there. Sauerkraut to pickles, sprouting grains and seeds to fermented grains and seeds, perhaps even aging beef, making pestrami and true dry salami. If I can't work, I should at least try to make myself useful. Since I can't even do daily~daily in a guaranteed manner, I might as well attempt to specialize in mid-term food and project efforts.
I am hoping to get a bath before my morning turns into a dawn. Between soaking and slathering I am hoping my feet will get better quickly. Much is improving, quickly and well. But much was wrong, and in really bad shape. A bath, more pumice stone, more slathering, a shave, and then in to town for some shopping and price comparing. Right... After this I will compare prices, tossing shipping into the equation, so I can compare apples to apples. Who cares if you get a 10% cheaper price, only to pay 25% more due to shipping and handling! I'm not the best with numbers, or tending them anyway, but I really try... when I can. Later.
Thursday, September 10, 2015
Still awake.
.
.
A bath and a lot of work with the pumice stone. It just isn't really getting through. I found a dermatology prescribed lotion and put that on. I've got to get my feet back in shape.
I called my mother. It sounds like she may be second guessing the trip this fall. Just not up to it. I don't know if this is just a bad day speaking, or what. I hope to go, I have at least one other planned stop I would have to renege on. I couldn't see my brother solo. I am honestly not sure I would be welcome. Given all of our ages and health, this may be the last time all three of us could gather together. And yet, I understand my mother's difficulties. While I have improved, the weight of life even now would be like adding twenty to forty years to my life age. It used to be as if I was even older though. So while it seems like I am getting younger, the improvement is a truly relative thing. At least so far. Then again, I am beginning to go through periods were I am more my age, or younger... or potentially. Anyway, I know her suffering. And I know her worries, about... arguments.
Travel would be quite expensive, driving. I am guessing right at $1,500-$2,000, with gas and lodging for ten days on the road, total. Hmm, well, and whatever food costs would go in there, and a few other things. Though planned well, I would only be slightly road weary, and would have seen parts of the US I haven't seen. Is seeing the world important? Yes and... no. I suppose I could consider comparison values, and all that jazz. It just... either it would be worth it or not. I must say, I have been pleased to see parts of Arizona, Nevada, Idaho, and Montana of recent years. And I'd like to see a bit more, even just by train. I am sure I have been to San Diego, but I have never seen L.A., San Fran, and a few other cities. I'm not a city fan. But if you can visit such a place, and avoid the worst parts, hit it at the best time, avoid the tourist traps but hit the truly good spots... A distraction, and something new.
If the trip is off, I have plenty of things that money could be used on. A bit more grain, if I am going to start using that. A manual grain mill for backup is the next big item. Perhaps some coin spilled on commercial or constructions bins in order to clear out the cave. Doesn't matter if I go or stay, I will want to get to work on that. Many things are wanted and needed. Hmm, I'd like to buy components for reloading. I believe it is time to work up hunting loads, and better defense pistol loads. I'm simply not interested in pure target loads.
Ah, but it is past 15:00. There is a good chance I can get out for shopping and some minor business tomorrow. I'll keep at it, if not. Soon, I hope. Later.
.
A bath and a lot of work with the pumice stone. It just isn't really getting through. I found a dermatology prescribed lotion and put that on. I've got to get my feet back in shape.
I called my mother. It sounds like she may be second guessing the trip this fall. Just not up to it. I don't know if this is just a bad day speaking, or what. I hope to go, I have at least one other planned stop I would have to renege on. I couldn't see my brother solo. I am honestly not sure I would be welcome. Given all of our ages and health, this may be the last time all three of us could gather together. And yet, I understand my mother's difficulties. While I have improved, the weight of life even now would be like adding twenty to forty years to my life age. It used to be as if I was even older though. So while it seems like I am getting younger, the improvement is a truly relative thing. At least so far. Then again, I am beginning to go through periods were I am more my age, or younger... or potentially. Anyway, I know her suffering. And I know her worries, about... arguments.
Travel would be quite expensive, driving. I am guessing right at $1,500-$2,000, with gas and lodging for ten days on the road, total. Hmm, well, and whatever food costs would go in there, and a few other things. Though planned well, I would only be slightly road weary, and would have seen parts of the US I haven't seen. Is seeing the world important? Yes and... no. I suppose I could consider comparison values, and all that jazz. It just... either it would be worth it or not. I must say, I have been pleased to see parts of Arizona, Nevada, Idaho, and Montana of recent years. And I'd like to see a bit more, even just by train. I am sure I have been to San Diego, but I have never seen L.A., San Fran, and a few other cities. I'm not a city fan. But if you can visit such a place, and avoid the worst parts, hit it at the best time, avoid the tourist traps but hit the truly good spots... A distraction, and something new.
If the trip is off, I have plenty of things that money could be used on. A bit more grain, if I am going to start using that. A manual grain mill for backup is the next big item. Perhaps some coin spilled on commercial or constructions bins in order to clear out the cave. Doesn't matter if I go or stay, I will want to get to work on that. Many things are wanted and needed. Hmm, I'd like to buy components for reloading. I believe it is time to work up hunting loads, and better defense pistol loads. I'm simply not interested in pure target loads.
Ah, but it is past 15:00. There is a good chance I can get out for shopping and some minor business tomorrow. I'll keep at it, if not. Soon, I hope. Later.
I thought I would get out.
.
.
No, I didn't want to go. I did have things to do, and if I can, I will override my want to rest. I think I got close. Just not close enough. I will bath again. My feet need it and I enjoy it when I can. Showers are okay, baths are better. I can only imagine swimming, wading, and washing in clear clean waters as being even better.
I was almost sure I was going to make it out. Then I snagged on some aspect of life and didn't make it. It is past noon, and I suspect I will be awake several more hours. A bath, drying off, perhaps a few phone calls.
I did place to calls. One to a local silver shop, another to my friend. Neither answered. Good thing, at least regarding my friend. I might have had to cancel if I made a promise. I was doing good, then just crashed. I'm pushing hard to stay up, if not just to stay awake. I want to get a bath in. The bath will keep me awake, I suspect, if I can get to it. Yeah, sounds crazy. Just... I work within a system that is so broken that I couldn't write a manual for it. It is unlike anything else out there. I know it, to a degree. If it is possible, I can make it happen. Though I can't always know if it isn't possible until I make an attempt, or near it.
I can do things others simply can't. Clicking 250 pound hand exercisers, given my condition, is probably unusual. I can't just squeeze out a dozen. Some days I can do a few, sometimes closing on ten. I can play sudoku at speeds that are unusual. I can do interesting things, given the givens. But they are more parlor tricks than sustainable or regular. I am hoping, though, that as medicine gets back in order, and as it cools, that maybe I can hike again, begin camping, and maybe push on into snowshoeing/camping. It is possible. A miraculous disaster? Something like that. I am looking for that spark... I may find it.
.
No, I didn't want to go. I did have things to do, and if I can, I will override my want to rest. I think I got close. Just not close enough. I will bath again. My feet need it and I enjoy it when I can. Showers are okay, baths are better. I can only imagine swimming, wading, and washing in clear clean waters as being even better.
I was almost sure I was going to make it out. Then I snagged on some aspect of life and didn't make it. It is past noon, and I suspect I will be awake several more hours. A bath, drying off, perhaps a few phone calls.
I did place to calls. One to a local silver shop, another to my friend. Neither answered. Good thing, at least regarding my friend. I might have had to cancel if I made a promise. I was doing good, then just crashed. I'm pushing hard to stay up, if not just to stay awake. I want to get a bath in. The bath will keep me awake, I suspect, if I can get to it. Yeah, sounds crazy. Just... I work within a system that is so broken that I couldn't write a manual for it. It is unlike anything else out there. I know it, to a degree. If it is possible, I can make it happen. Though I can't always know if it isn't possible until I make an attempt, or near it.
I can do things others simply can't. Clicking 250 pound hand exercisers, given my condition, is probably unusual. I can't just squeeze out a dozen. Some days I can do a few, sometimes closing on ten. I can play sudoku at speeds that are unusual. I can do interesting things, given the givens. But they are more parlor tricks than sustainable or regular. I am hoping, though, that as medicine gets back in order, and as it cools, that maybe I can hike again, begin camping, and maybe push on into snowshoeing/camping. It is possible. A miraculous disaster? Something like that. I am looking for that spark... I may find it.
Wednesday, September 9, 2015
Things are still very off.
.
.
A season change, just working on medication dosage... that will take about another week and then recovery time, and figuring out life in all that. It will take some time. For whatever reason, my feet had become so dry they were painful to walk on normally. Even drinking fluids by the bucketful it seems, my body was becoming desiccated. I honestly was worrying about rips. My left heel and right front pad, plus the split between my left big and next toe, all had severe problems. I've been showering, the usual every few days, mostly. But not using anything. Then again, I haven't used stuff, save for occasional attempts at moisturizers, which all failed, mostly, or at least over time.
A bath, tonight. A long soak, olive oil in the epsom salt and essence. Lemon and lime, I think, this time. I have found it is best to only make one jar of goop at a time. Having two or three around will allow the salt to cake, making it nearly useless and a hazard to try to use. I honestly didn't think a single application and use of the pumice stone would really do much. But without starting, no cumulative affect would be had. Actually, just one hit really did help. But then I soaked for a good long time (as far as a attention deprived fool can count time, mind you), and really hit the feet with oil, the stone, and just plain massaging. I am amazed. And yet, I am hoping to soak, perhaps, once a day for the next few days to week. My feet were in serious trouble, and really still are.
You know, I was thinking, it is simply very odd. If I change my medicine just a little bit, quite often I can go through serious effects. Not always, but it is very possible. Too much of this food, or that, or fluid, or too little, and I can suffer. I never know what is going to bring pain, or fever, or solidify my skin (on my feet in this case) so much that the meat under it gets pinched by walking. And yet lye didn't even open me up after ingestion, avoiding vomiting for hours and limiting the episodes to three, and then waiting twelve hours to go for help. By which time there was nothing they could do. Don't ask me. And don't give me that placebo effect garbage. That works on the weak minded, for the most part. Check it out. I have been on enough medication, as well, to know better. It is simply strange how I can be so vulnerable to some things and invulnerable to others. It doesn't make sense. But, yes, quite often, I am a medicine light-weight.
By the way, I think it is, or is nearly, a month since I have been off tobacco. Oh, I still jones for it, from time to time. Or just plain get set to go look for my can of tobacco, off hand, before I realize that isn't part of the program anymore. I do wonder if that is playing a part in my sense of dehydration, or fact of it? I just know I am thirsty, thirsty, thirsty. I also know that I cannot drink enough. Which means some part of my thirst is of the mind, or a false sense caused by something else... a misinterpretation by my mind of some other things going on. I keep trying to figure out what it is about, but so far nothing has been noted. I seem thirsty... no, I am thirsty. But not just for fluids. Fluids help just a bit, not enough. I have tried things I should and things I shouldn't drink. Salted beer is the best, sports drinks don't do anything, coffee isn't helpful, various fruit, vegetable, and punches do little, water just leaves me thirstier. I don't know. Could be something to do with tobacco, or having been low on insulin, or maybe the summer just caught my body off-guard this summer?
Sleep is still off, but seems to be normalizing. Nights are my days, for now. I am working at getting that pushed around, with some success. But that is moving slow. I wish I understood this all. I am hoping, in a few days to weeks, to be back to normal enough to begin... living again. We'll see. Later.
.
A season change, just working on medication dosage... that will take about another week and then recovery time, and figuring out life in all that. It will take some time. For whatever reason, my feet had become so dry they were painful to walk on normally. Even drinking fluids by the bucketful it seems, my body was becoming desiccated. I honestly was worrying about rips. My left heel and right front pad, plus the split between my left big and next toe, all had severe problems. I've been showering, the usual every few days, mostly. But not using anything. Then again, I haven't used stuff, save for occasional attempts at moisturizers, which all failed, mostly, or at least over time.
A bath, tonight. A long soak, olive oil in the epsom salt and essence. Lemon and lime, I think, this time. I have found it is best to only make one jar of goop at a time. Having two or three around will allow the salt to cake, making it nearly useless and a hazard to try to use. I honestly didn't think a single application and use of the pumice stone would really do much. But without starting, no cumulative affect would be had. Actually, just one hit really did help. But then I soaked for a good long time (as far as a attention deprived fool can count time, mind you), and really hit the feet with oil, the stone, and just plain massaging. I am amazed. And yet, I am hoping to soak, perhaps, once a day for the next few days to week. My feet were in serious trouble, and really still are.
You know, I was thinking, it is simply very odd. If I change my medicine just a little bit, quite often I can go through serious effects. Not always, but it is very possible. Too much of this food, or that, or fluid, or too little, and I can suffer. I never know what is going to bring pain, or fever, or solidify my skin (on my feet in this case) so much that the meat under it gets pinched by walking. And yet lye didn't even open me up after ingestion, avoiding vomiting for hours and limiting the episodes to three, and then waiting twelve hours to go for help. By which time there was nothing they could do. Don't ask me. And don't give me that placebo effect garbage. That works on the weak minded, for the most part. Check it out. I have been on enough medication, as well, to know better. It is simply strange how I can be so vulnerable to some things and invulnerable to others. It doesn't make sense. But, yes, quite often, I am a medicine light-weight.
By the way, I think it is, or is nearly, a month since I have been off tobacco. Oh, I still jones for it, from time to time. Or just plain get set to go look for my can of tobacco, off hand, before I realize that isn't part of the program anymore. I do wonder if that is playing a part in my sense of dehydration, or fact of it? I just know I am thirsty, thirsty, thirsty. I also know that I cannot drink enough. Which means some part of my thirst is of the mind, or a false sense caused by something else... a misinterpretation by my mind of some other things going on. I keep trying to figure out what it is about, but so far nothing has been noted. I seem thirsty... no, I am thirsty. But not just for fluids. Fluids help just a bit, not enough. I have tried things I should and things I shouldn't drink. Salted beer is the best, sports drinks don't do anything, coffee isn't helpful, various fruit, vegetable, and punches do little, water just leaves me thirstier. I don't know. Could be something to do with tobacco, or having been low on insulin, or maybe the summer just caught my body off-guard this summer?
Sleep is still off, but seems to be normalizing. Nights are my days, for now. I am working at getting that pushed around, with some success. But that is moving slow. I wish I understood this all. I am hoping, in a few days to weeks, to be back to normal enough to begin... living again. We'll see. Later.
Tuesday, September 8, 2015
That worked.
.
.
No promises, but for now it looks like everything should work. Doc suggests, at the dosage I am on, perhaps changes are in order. Fine. I am the patient, which means boss. But I am going to him for expert opinion and treatment options. It's sort of like when being called to mother's table. If we really couldn't eat it, we wouldn't have to do so. We would, however, have to try everything. And, to be honest, the witch tried things we didn't like before, every once in a while. Now, to our betterment, if through moments of nausea, in the end. Though never fully. There are still some things I can't, or won't, or wouldn't if the choice were mine. Plus, he has an obligation to the state. Fine, as things stand. A visit, stats taken, and then blood tests. I was a bit worried about those. I had planned for the doctor, but not really for tests. Not a full blindside, just... a worry that became more real at that moment.
I had brought extra, as the last visit has been way over what I had been told up front. Double or so? Something. I didn't know if that was a common practice for medical types these days. They suggested, perhaps, trying to bill the V.A., for the tests. But when I saw how little the tests were, I just wanted to pay those and not involve the V.A. Cash up front. Anything hugely major, and I won't have much choice. Even a broken leg and... hahaha Tricked you. As many times as I have jumped or fallen, at speed, from bad heights, and landed at ugly angles... Yeah... Okay, but maybe, just maybe, something like an bad case of appendicitis. Which still has me thinking that moving might be best. Having a local doc, however, might just buy me time to rearrange things and get in shape for the move, or... settle back down. Even that latter depends on... something that might be more fantasy than possibility. This does buy me time to choose, ask, think.
I know some of the locals at least think I am... okay. Mostly. But there are some who would outright kill me if they thought they could and could get away with it. SJWs are everywhere. If they want me gone quickly, just come across with $200k for my home. That will pay the bill and send me on my way with a reasonable grubstake. *wink* They don't work honestly though.
I almost missed the appointment. I wrote it down, somewhere. Then seem to have lost the note before getting it into my calendar. I thought the appointment was at 10:00 or 10:30, it was at 9:00. I got a shower last night, but wanted another today, and a shave, and cleaner clothes, and... got none of it. I did apologize on that score. I was, for the most part, presentable. I think. Save for my shirt. But I had no time to change it when I realized the time of the appointment. I literally had just enough time to be somewhat late, and beg. Which I was and did. I knew there was a bit of a spill, black olive juice, the last of it, as I tipped the last few olives out in my half sleep this early morning while trying to stay awake to call for the appointment time.
Still, there it is. Done, for a while. I asked the secretary, or whatever they are called these days, if he would get that out in time for the deadline, the 16th. I've got to tell you, my luck with a certain age of women these days has been terrible. Actually, that age has expanded of late. *cough* Neo-Neo *cough* Whether by hook or crook, I just don't... I think... I know... tomorrow,I will call and get the extension. I just didn't like the glint in her eye. Maybe, maybe not, but it looked more like a... the doctor WILL get it signed, but I definitely won't get it there... sparkle in her eye. I could be wrong, but why worry. *wink right back*
Well... tired. I'll rest until dinner arrives. Or crash. I don't have much choice. I wanted to nap earlier, but couldn't. Then I wanted to stay awake until later. I, sometimes, simply don't get a choice. Later... or maybe good night. I simply can't do better. Tired.
.
No promises, but for now it looks like everything should work. Doc suggests, at the dosage I am on, perhaps changes are in order. Fine. I am the patient, which means boss. But I am going to him for expert opinion and treatment options. It's sort of like when being called to mother's table. If we really couldn't eat it, we wouldn't have to do so. We would, however, have to try everything. And, to be honest, the witch tried things we didn't like before, every once in a while. Now, to our betterment, if through moments of nausea, in the end. Though never fully. There are still some things I can't, or won't, or wouldn't if the choice were mine. Plus, he has an obligation to the state. Fine, as things stand. A visit, stats taken, and then blood tests. I was a bit worried about those. I had planned for the doctor, but not really for tests. Not a full blindside, just... a worry that became more real at that moment.
I had brought extra, as the last visit has been way over what I had been told up front. Double or so? Something. I didn't know if that was a common practice for medical types these days. They suggested, perhaps, trying to bill the V.A., for the tests. But when I saw how little the tests were, I just wanted to pay those and not involve the V.A. Cash up front. Anything hugely major, and I won't have much choice. Even a broken leg and... hahaha Tricked you. As many times as I have jumped or fallen, at speed, from bad heights, and landed at ugly angles... Yeah... Okay, but maybe, just maybe, something like an bad case of appendicitis. Which still has me thinking that moving might be best. Having a local doc, however, might just buy me time to rearrange things and get in shape for the move, or... settle back down. Even that latter depends on... something that might be more fantasy than possibility. This does buy me time to choose, ask, think.
I know some of the locals at least think I am... okay. Mostly. But there are some who would outright kill me if they thought they could and could get away with it. SJWs are everywhere. If they want me gone quickly, just come across with $200k for my home. That will pay the bill and send me on my way with a reasonable grubstake. *wink* They don't work honestly though.
I almost missed the appointment. I wrote it down, somewhere. Then seem to have lost the note before getting it into my calendar. I thought the appointment was at 10:00 or 10:30, it was at 9:00. I got a shower last night, but wanted another today, and a shave, and cleaner clothes, and... got none of it. I did apologize on that score. I was, for the most part, presentable. I think. Save for my shirt. But I had no time to change it when I realized the time of the appointment. I literally had just enough time to be somewhat late, and beg. Which I was and did. I knew there was a bit of a spill, black olive juice, the last of it, as I tipped the last few olives out in my half sleep this early morning while trying to stay awake to call for the appointment time.
Still, there it is. Done, for a while. I asked the secretary, or whatever they are called these days, if he would get that out in time for the deadline, the 16th. I've got to tell you, my luck with a certain age of women these days has been terrible. Actually, that age has expanded of late. *cough* Neo-Neo *cough* Whether by hook or crook, I just don't... I think... I know... tomorrow,I will call and get the extension. I just didn't like the glint in her eye. Maybe, maybe not, but it looked more like a... the doctor WILL get it signed, but I definitely won't get it there... sparkle in her eye. I could be wrong, but why worry. *wink right back*
Well... tired. I'll rest until dinner arrives. Or crash. I don't have much choice. I wanted to nap earlier, but couldn't. Then I wanted to stay awake until later. I, sometimes, simply don't get a choice. Later... or maybe good night. I simply can't do better. Tired.
Electricity went down.
.
.
A strange night for that to happen. No heavy or hard weather. It wasn't too hot or cold. Nothing seemed to be wrong. I looked outside. It seemed as if I was the only one. I don't really know what to do about such events, so I just made up a plan. I thought to call the electric company, but knew, if I was answering the call, in spite of never having called before or answered such a call, that I would want to know if the fuse box had been checked. So... I checked that first. Everything off, then back on. Just to make sure. Nope. So I called. Without electricity, at night, but not even close to bedtime, options are limited. I do have flashlights available, and handy. I also found a couple of those snap and glow lights, and used two, just for general light.
Then I bunch of things hit. First, I needed to be showered for tomorrow. If they didn't turn electricity back on before morning, that would mean a cold shower. I suppose I could have heated water in a number of ways... The grill, the propane heater, or the rocketstove, at least. I do have a number of cookstoves as well, though those are mostly for smaller volumes. But that would have taken a bit of fussing and finding and digging and scraping. So... I thought, perhaps, to take a shower before the water got cold.
I worried, next, about the freezers and refrigerator. I can't really do much about those. I guess I just hoped electricity would come back on fast enough. I suppose a backup generator would be nice. But getting it wired in sounds like a major chore or expense. It's just not in the budget. Usually when the electricity goes out, and stays out, it's in the winter. I suppose, in that situation, turning off the water at the main, draining the pipes, and just figuring out how to stay warm enough to survive is the thing. The cold will take care of the rest. Though the refrigerated food may freeze to ruin? If I was sure I'd be staying, I would definitely get some sort of backup generator online. As is, it's not in the cards. I'd honestly prefer to put in a minor solar system, just for overhead lights, and perhaps minor appliances along with my new ac/dc fridge/freezer. Hmm... I could have fired that up and put it to freeze, running it on the batter. If all else failed, and I drained my battery, I have the tools to kick it over and perhaps recharge it.
I have so many things to do tomorrow, though, that I was worried. Some of my clocks and alarms have batter backups, but how long those last in a grid-down is difficult to be sure. Old batteries? Have they been used a time or three already? A few hours. Newer or barely used batteries? A day? Half a day? All unknown. I still would want a shower in the morning. Rent a room somewhere? It depends. If electricity comes on, when? If it's an hour before I need to go, even three, there wouldn't be time to heat the water. Bleh.
As it turns out, electricity did come back on. My next trick is to be awake when I need that. I can't find where the appointment is written. They weren't open today, so I couldn't call. I thought of calling Friday, but was so sleep deprived, and off schedule as well, that it didn't happen. I knew, wrongly, that I could call today. Ugh. Sometimes it's an ugly life. It doesn't take much to make an ugly life a little shop of horrors. Thankfully, this time, just for a moment. Probably. Later.
.
A strange night for that to happen. No heavy or hard weather. It wasn't too hot or cold. Nothing seemed to be wrong. I looked outside. It seemed as if I was the only one. I don't really know what to do about such events, so I just made up a plan. I thought to call the electric company, but knew, if I was answering the call, in spite of never having called before or answered such a call, that I would want to know if the fuse box had been checked. So... I checked that first. Everything off, then back on. Just to make sure. Nope. So I called. Without electricity, at night, but not even close to bedtime, options are limited. I do have flashlights available, and handy. I also found a couple of those snap and glow lights, and used two, just for general light.
Then I bunch of things hit. First, I needed to be showered for tomorrow. If they didn't turn electricity back on before morning, that would mean a cold shower. I suppose I could have heated water in a number of ways... The grill, the propane heater, or the rocketstove, at least. I do have a number of cookstoves as well, though those are mostly for smaller volumes. But that would have taken a bit of fussing and finding and digging and scraping. So... I thought, perhaps, to take a shower before the water got cold.
I worried, next, about the freezers and refrigerator. I can't really do much about those. I guess I just hoped electricity would come back on fast enough. I suppose a backup generator would be nice. But getting it wired in sounds like a major chore or expense. It's just not in the budget. Usually when the electricity goes out, and stays out, it's in the winter. I suppose, in that situation, turning off the water at the main, draining the pipes, and just figuring out how to stay warm enough to survive is the thing. The cold will take care of the rest. Though the refrigerated food may freeze to ruin? If I was sure I'd be staying, I would definitely get some sort of backup generator online. As is, it's not in the cards. I'd honestly prefer to put in a minor solar system, just for overhead lights, and perhaps minor appliances along with my new ac/dc fridge/freezer. Hmm... I could have fired that up and put it to freeze, running it on the batter. If all else failed, and I drained my battery, I have the tools to kick it over and perhaps recharge it.
I have so many things to do tomorrow, though, that I was worried. Some of my clocks and alarms have batter backups, but how long those last in a grid-down is difficult to be sure. Old batteries? Have they been used a time or three already? A few hours. Newer or barely used batteries? A day? Half a day? All unknown. I still would want a shower in the morning. Rent a room somewhere? It depends. If electricity comes on, when? If it's an hour before I need to go, even three, there wouldn't be time to heat the water. Bleh.
As it turns out, electricity did come back on. My next trick is to be awake when I need that. I can't find where the appointment is written. They weren't open today, so I couldn't call. I thought of calling Friday, but was so sleep deprived, and off schedule as well, that it didn't happen. I knew, wrongly, that I could call today. Ugh. Sometimes it's an ugly life. It doesn't take much to make an ugly life a little shop of horrors. Thankfully, this time, just for a moment. Probably. Later.
Monday, September 7, 2015
Cool is helping.
.
.
Dropping into the 40's F doesn't fix everything. It does help a sort of internal fever from burning up all energy and will. I'm not able to do a great deal, but some. I washed one round of dishes last night. I should finish them yet today. I also got the trash and recycling out. Hmm... wait, today is a holiday. They didn't need to be out until tomorrow, probably. They are out though. I wondered why no one else had their barrels out! Ah, and I am trying to keep my kefir supply in good order. I have found that really fresh kefir is simply too watery. I prefer it after it has been given a first fermenting, then strained of kefir grains, fermented about a day that way, maybe strained again, and then refrigerated for several days to a week. Sometimes I will strain it for use, sometimes not, depending on how much chunk I want in it. And, yes, sometimes I do like a bit more texture.
I am hoping to get the dishes finished before too awful long. I was going to wait until recycling was picked up, until as noted I realized that wasn't going to happen. The dish towels are clean and dry, probably. I might run them through a heated dry cycle before folding and putting them up, and using some of them. Between putting up towels and drying the dishes, plus the trash and recycling, I believe that will be it for in-house today. Depending on if a shower or bath is considered work? But I would like to get in to town and look over frames for paper targets, and paper targets as well. I really would like to get three double hangers. And of course paper targets, at 15', 25', maybe 50', plenty of 100', 200', and maybe even 300' paper targets. Cans or range rot, while easy and fun, just isn't good enough. Especially with a couple of places, and firearms, that will reach out a bit more. I suppose, in time, metal targets too. But, really, you have to buy one/several for each distance, and they are pretty pricey. Though they are better for much longer ranges, so you don't need to visually check. The sound will let you know.
I did call my friend, to let him know I might be in town. Shopping, a bite to eat, and maybe trying to figure out where I need to go soon enough for some other business. He is thinking about shooting. I'm not quite so interested. Hmm... I may actually need a nap first. Yeah, I'll set the alarm, and hope that works. I told him I wouldn't be in until early afternoon, though if I can be out by noon I will. Two, four, six, even eight, would technically be fine. Earlier is simply preferred.
Has everyone fallen off the blog posting and commenting circuit? Wow, just dead out there. Now, I am hit or miss, but something at least daily. Some of you guys are so off your feed that I'm not sure you are still alive! You too, madame, but you have indicated you will just enjoy the fruits of others. Fie! But fine. Dames get away with everything, and for a reason. :p
Later.
.
Dropping into the 40's F doesn't fix everything. It does help a sort of internal fever from burning up all energy and will. I'm not able to do a great deal, but some. I washed one round of dishes last night. I should finish them yet today. I also got the trash and recycling out. Hmm... wait, today is a holiday. They didn't need to be out until tomorrow, probably. They are out though. I wondered why no one else had their barrels out! Ah, and I am trying to keep my kefir supply in good order. I have found that really fresh kefir is simply too watery. I prefer it after it has been given a first fermenting, then strained of kefir grains, fermented about a day that way, maybe strained again, and then refrigerated for several days to a week. Sometimes I will strain it for use, sometimes not, depending on how much chunk I want in it. And, yes, sometimes I do like a bit more texture.
I am hoping to get the dishes finished before too awful long. I was going to wait until recycling was picked up, until as noted I realized that wasn't going to happen. The dish towels are clean and dry, probably. I might run them through a heated dry cycle before folding and putting them up, and using some of them. Between putting up towels and drying the dishes, plus the trash and recycling, I believe that will be it for in-house today. Depending on if a shower or bath is considered work? But I would like to get in to town and look over frames for paper targets, and paper targets as well. I really would like to get three double hangers. And of course paper targets, at 15', 25', maybe 50', plenty of 100', 200', and maybe even 300' paper targets. Cans or range rot, while easy and fun, just isn't good enough. Especially with a couple of places, and firearms, that will reach out a bit more. I suppose, in time, metal targets too. But, really, you have to buy one/several for each distance, and they are pretty pricey. Though they are better for much longer ranges, so you don't need to visually check. The sound will let you know.
I did call my friend, to let him know I might be in town. Shopping, a bite to eat, and maybe trying to figure out where I need to go soon enough for some other business. He is thinking about shooting. I'm not quite so interested. Hmm... I may actually need a nap first. Yeah, I'll set the alarm, and hope that works. I told him I wouldn't be in until early afternoon, though if I can be out by noon I will. Two, four, six, even eight, would technically be fine. Earlier is simply preferred.
Has everyone fallen off the blog posting and commenting circuit? Wow, just dead out there. Now, I am hit or miss, but something at least daily. Some of you guys are so off your feed that I'm not sure you are still alive! You too, madame, but you have indicated you will just enjoy the fruits of others. Fie! But fine. Dames get away with everything, and for a reason. :p
Later.
Sunday, September 6, 2015
Just a touch of psychic jazz.
.
.
No, not jazz music, at all. More the conflations of life that aren't necessarily repeatable... the only jazz I like. Some thoughts about the past, present, and future. As I am seeing them anyway.
.
No, not jazz music, at all. More the conflations of life that aren't necessarily repeatable... the only jazz I like. Some thoughts about the past, present, and future. As I am seeing them anyway.
The way of the future?
.
.
I hate using alarm clocks. It is just that I get a much better idea of how long I sleep, and I sleep with more confidence. More, if I am oversleeping, it gives me some idea of how much. Why do I need to know these things? Ah, because if one problem, or another, is cropping up, sometimes I can consciously change things. Normally, for the last year or even three, I have been doing pretty good about just know what is going on. My mind tracks these things. Not so in the last week or... whatever... month? And yet I haven't completely fallen. An alarm clock might just fill the gaps in my memory and all. I set the alarm for eight hours and woke just before it, if I am not sure I quite got out of bed before it went off. I just woke up, yeah, that is how bad memory is. Still, I know I slept at right between seven and an half hours, and eight. Slept? Was down. Sleep was wonky.
I did call my mother before I went to bed. It's mid to high 90's, with high humidity out there. Actually, I did score one nearly right thought. She was supposed to be at a wedding when I called her yesterday. Just as a guest though. But the heat and humidity got to her, so she called in sick. They have had a decent summer out there, too. It's just dragging a little long. She'll miss it when it's gone, mostly. I guess even she gets tired of the heat, either that is such an Iowa girl that a season out of place, even her favored wrong, sets wrong in the body and mind. It's just good to hear her voice. God usually gives us our parents for long enough into life that we can handle whatever may come. Though that isn't always true. The idea is there, though. It's the reverse that seems most unfair. And yet, it truly is the good who die young... even if they don't understand it.
It's a bit rough, again, today. Not so bad as most of this week if also no where near as good as it was for a couple of days, mostly. It feels as if the boxing team has all gotten a couple of free shots to my midsection. That'll teach em'! That is the worst of it, so I can't really complain. I have two people still on my convalescence prayer list. I am not included. I figure pain is the price for my life, and it has cosmic uses. I keep hoping for some email that just hasn't shown up. Someone said there were things I should know, asked for my email, then... nothing. Though he is on the convalescence list, so now I have concerns both about his query and his health. Oh, I know, I will suffer at him! That'll teach him. :p
A shower, as soon as possible, then? I don't know. Later.
.
I hate using alarm clocks. It is just that I get a much better idea of how long I sleep, and I sleep with more confidence. More, if I am oversleeping, it gives me some idea of how much. Why do I need to know these things? Ah, because if one problem, or another, is cropping up, sometimes I can consciously change things. Normally, for the last year or even three, I have been doing pretty good about just know what is going on. My mind tracks these things. Not so in the last week or... whatever... month? And yet I haven't completely fallen. An alarm clock might just fill the gaps in my memory and all. I set the alarm for eight hours and woke just before it, if I am not sure I quite got out of bed before it went off. I just woke up, yeah, that is how bad memory is. Still, I know I slept at right between seven and an half hours, and eight. Slept? Was down. Sleep was wonky.
I did call my mother before I went to bed. It's mid to high 90's, with high humidity out there. Actually, I did score one nearly right thought. She was supposed to be at a wedding when I called her yesterday. Just as a guest though. But the heat and humidity got to her, so she called in sick. They have had a decent summer out there, too. It's just dragging a little long. She'll miss it when it's gone, mostly. I guess even she gets tired of the heat, either that is such an Iowa girl that a season out of place, even her favored wrong, sets wrong in the body and mind. It's just good to hear her voice. God usually gives us our parents for long enough into life that we can handle whatever may come. Though that isn't always true. The idea is there, though. It's the reverse that seems most unfair. And yet, it truly is the good who die young... even if they don't understand it.
It's a bit rough, again, today. Not so bad as most of this week if also no where near as good as it was for a couple of days, mostly. It feels as if the boxing team has all gotten a couple of free shots to my midsection. That'll teach em'! That is the worst of it, so I can't really complain. I have two people still on my convalescence prayer list. I am not included. I figure pain is the price for my life, and it has cosmic uses. I keep hoping for some email that just hasn't shown up. Someone said there were things I should know, asked for my email, then... nothing. Though he is on the convalescence list, so now I have concerns both about his query and his health. Oh, I know, I will suffer at him! That'll teach him. :p
A shower, as soon as possible, then? I don't know. Later.
It's been a good night all night.
.
.
Oh, little problems and difficulties. Given the givens, this has been the best, and a full, waking cycle I have had for a goodly while now. I suspect that it being much cooler is helping. I don't know what the low was, but I saw 49 display on the e-thermometer, which is usually high. I have seen it 10 degrees F high, and more, frequently. I decided to check, 45 currently, with the sun just up. That was probably the low, though it can go cooler through the day sometimes. Yes, summer has broken. We may still get warm, even hot spells. Though once it breaks lower like this, I really think fall will shine a bit more often.
I have decided to do a bit more for target practice. Cans are fine, and this and that is all good. Still, I would like to get proper targets. Just paper target holders and paper targets for 15', 25', 100', 200', and 300'. If those get used, then I'll move on to greater distances, right on out to 600', if I can. Iron will only take me, probably, to about 200'. On the rifle. I can probably do out to 100' with my pistols. Not minute of angle, mind you, with a pistol. Though very possibly with the rifles. Some of them. Yeah. Something to do. And I'd like to work both iron sights and the scope on several of my rifles. One is only iron, one is only scope, and one is both. It's best to shoot on week days. Not just for my preference to have more privacy, but also because the working stiffs who only get weekends deserve me using my time wisely. I'll call my friend and make a visit Monday. Possibly just to price shop targets and holders, perhaps rebar, a rebar planter, and a rebar puller. Then, if there is time, a trip to the range. If not, a meal and plans for a trip on another day.
I'll call my mother again, see if she will answer. I don't fuss too much. I know if weather is pulling cool here, it might be there. But fall is on the way. It sort of beats her up, she's a summer girl. She feels the cold moving closer right in her bones. She has age, I have health... for her it's cold, for me it's the change that sets things off. I mean, when I called she didn't answer. I suspect she went to bed very early. Then again, the woman can, even now, be a workaholic. She can't say know, even when she should. Who know, maybe she was cooking for a horde, for a wedding, anniversary, funeral, or family gathering. The woman ain't no slouch. At least, finally, I understand I am not either. I am simply mostly dead. But what I have done in my condition is amazing and more, if I can't do it every time, like she can.
Later. Or good night.
.
Oh, little problems and difficulties. Given the givens, this has been the best, and a full, waking cycle I have had for a goodly while now. I suspect that it being much cooler is helping. I don't know what the low was, but I saw 49 display on the e-thermometer, which is usually high. I have seen it 10 degrees F high, and more, frequently. I decided to check, 45 currently, with the sun just up. That was probably the low, though it can go cooler through the day sometimes. Yes, summer has broken. We may still get warm, even hot spells. Though once it breaks lower like this, I really think fall will shine a bit more often.
I have decided to do a bit more for target practice. Cans are fine, and this and that is all good. Still, I would like to get proper targets. Just paper target holders and paper targets for 15', 25', 100', 200', and 300'. If those get used, then I'll move on to greater distances, right on out to 600', if I can. Iron will only take me, probably, to about 200'. On the rifle. I can probably do out to 100' with my pistols. Not minute of angle, mind you, with a pistol. Though very possibly with the rifles. Some of them. Yeah. Something to do. And I'd like to work both iron sights and the scope on several of my rifles. One is only iron, one is only scope, and one is both. It's best to shoot on week days. Not just for my preference to have more privacy, but also because the working stiffs who only get weekends deserve me using my time wisely. I'll call my friend and make a visit Monday. Possibly just to price shop targets and holders, perhaps rebar, a rebar planter, and a rebar puller. Then, if there is time, a trip to the range. If not, a meal and plans for a trip on another day.
I'll call my mother again, see if she will answer. I don't fuss too much. I know if weather is pulling cool here, it might be there. But fall is on the way. It sort of beats her up, she's a summer girl. She feels the cold moving closer right in her bones. She has age, I have health... for her it's cold, for me it's the change that sets things off. I mean, when I called she didn't answer. I suspect she went to bed very early. Then again, the woman can, even now, be a workaholic. She can't say know, even when she should. Who know, maybe she was cooking for a horde, for a wedding, anniversary, funeral, or family gathering. The woman ain't no slouch. At least, finally, I understand I am not either. I am simply mostly dead. But what I have done in my condition is amazing and more, if I can't do it every time, like she can.
Later. Or good night.
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