Someone is digging.

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Exactly, specifically, and pretty far back.  No, not lucky hits.  They know what they seek.  And they are finding it.  I suppose my conversations, and recent posts, have stirred something in someone(s).  Yes.  I do believe so.  Which, in turns, is stirring something in me.

The... rest, or whole, of the story?  Fine.  Do the digging, I'll do the telling.  Appearances in these aren't the same, but the ideas are.

Sleep cycles are simply not level.

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Like a rollercoaster.  Awake for three to ten, down for four to twelve, up for six, down for eight.  I have been using alarm clocks to sort things, but that just isn't working.  I have five times, on my various clocks, available.  I have been using three of those.  To absolutely no good.  I hear them, but wake up shaky as a baby, with no strength to wake.  And sometimes taking a cycle or two to sort out how to just turn them off, knowing there is no way I will wake up.

Three alarms this afternoon.  In truth, I turned two off, then realized the third had no chance so turned it off.  That was a 16:00 alarm, it was 19:00 when I am finally, barely, crawled out of bed.  An half hour later and I'm almost thinking of going on back to bed?

Cat tracks?

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Never can be certain.  But... when I see foreign things, and old thoughts?

I do suspect.  A suspicious man.

Finally feel mostly rested?

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Sleep has been off.  Too much, but in shorter periods.  I think, I say I think, I am sleeping between four to eight hours at a time, and awake more like four to eight hours at a time as well.  I just can't stay awake long.  A normal day runs between fourteen and eighteen hours.  A normal sleep is between six and eight hours.  Sometimes  Alarms will help me maintain that.  Currently, not so much.  Usually waking before the alarms go off, if sleeping twice as frequently, in parcels, as usual.

The weather, medicine, and not eating, are all playing a roll.  I really need to get propane in, begin cooking.  I do have kefir going.

Well?

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Sorting out the morning.  Still dark, overcast, possibly wet, and cool to cold out there.  And it creeps in.  But... fine.

I changed the bandaging, and it went really well.  No lidocaine needed.  I should have changed it earlier.  By the looks, it seemed minor.  But, when opened, it had filled the bandaging with blood a bit more than it seemed.  Fine.  Live and learn.  I have a better idea of what to look for, so when to change it.

Oh, right.

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I was awake around midnight, until two?  Or so.  But the internet was dead.  Was still tired anyway.  So I just crashed.  I finally woke up around four thirty?  Or so.  It is six, now.  I looked around the internet.  Looking for anything new or interesting.  Nada thing.  Well, some things, just nothing real.

Sure, I am surprised Net has been ordered arrested.  It'll never happen, or be fully functioned.  Unless the US and Europe are going a different way, and Israel is turning a new, or fake new, leaf.  That, if slightly a surprise, looks more like a warning shot, wake up call.  Nothing more.

Up way early.

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To bed sometime between 1:30 and 2:30?  Probably in the latter half more likely?  I'm pretty sure of it.  then awake around 5:30?  Not sure I'll be awake much longer, but it's nearing eight.  And I... will probably still be awake another hour or three?

Cloudy, again?  Sure seems like it.  At least there was some sun yesterday when I got out.  Lately, any time the sun shines you best take it, enjoy it.

Rough.

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I promised to be to an event this evening.  A meal out, in which a portion would go to charity.  But... I had been working all day... morning... later evening.

I believe I was up around 18:30 last night, and drifted and worked through the day.  Finally getting what else I could do done by 11:00?  10:30?  Then down.  I set alarms for 15:00 and 16:30.  I couldn't crawl out until 17:00?  Or so.  Then had to take a shower, dress, and go... with an half hour drive time and the shower and dressing, it was closing in on 18:30 when I arrived?

So tired, I can't remember.  But... I did make it.  And I did have a dinner.  Not carnivore, not keto, but... sometimes that is the way it goes.

There was a large group in front of me.  And the orders were slow.  Thankfully, they just let me go on ahead of them.  No, I wasn't fussing or such.  They were merely gracious.

As well, I saw one of my friends, and the KoC chief when I joined, and a new guy.  Well, and a few other folk, here and there.

So tired.  But, from getting up, showering, and shipping out, I had too much energy and such being produced to crash when I got home.  I hate being messed up like that.  That is just how it goes sometimes.  Almost ready to sleep, finally.

A good day, if a bit brutal.  Goodnight.

A... story about a story.

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Two... but... we'll stick with the one, for now.

What she thought?

Someone...

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Someone brought up the notion of... hard, mean, dark, women.  Oh... I had to laugh.  And remember.  Some songs, dedicated to those affairs, presented her in the past.

I remember seven, eight?  Seven for sure, but I think there was another one back there, just... a bit too foggy to remember fully.  Ring-tailed sort of mean, but more lost in time.

A bit more.

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Laundry is flipped.  The dry pulled, the washed drying, and a new load into the washing machine.  Teeth brushed, after a few cans of kippers.  Well, and tea.  I went with green plus herbals/forals.  Wonderful.  Each batch I make is a bit different.  This time with caffeine, regular if green, tea.  I have white, green, and oolong teas, plus... six herbals and florals?  Some things don't work best together.  I... need to keep a list and cross reference things.

A bit of a rest.  I had to go upstairs, to pull a big second batch of laundry.  Then separate cotton from synthetic.  The cotton went in.  It'll take two loads to dry the load that is in, heavier synthetic pants, a heavy "farm/industrial" jacket, and a synthetic winter jacket just... take time.  I am hoping to finish the drying of the two loads going currently, then have the last load of synthetics through, and into the dryer.  Can I get that done before bedtime?  Maybe, but more likely not.

Actually getting to things.

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Laundry was started.  I had planned to do that after a shower.  But... that wasn't moving along.  Pants and jackets, as a first run.  Then, shirts and underwear.  Plus, when they are dried, I'll try to get them folded and put in airtight bags.  My house is rough, this helps.  Same with jackets and maybe some shirts?  Just t-shirts, I mostly wear black t's.  I have one of those folding boards which does really well with getting shirts folded.

As well, I got the freezertop cleared, then washed.  Pulled meat to the other freezer.  Nothing out, to be thawed yet.  If I get propane tanks filled sometime this week I will pull meat out to thaw.  Burger and steaks, but getting low.  Well, I still have, probably a dozen steaks in the drop in freezer, and maybe... ten to twelve packs of burger.  Plus a quarter to half that in the fridge freezer.  Plus a placket of ribs, various roasts, and eight to twelve multi-pound packs of ground pork.  Food for a while.  A pack of burger, or  two, per week.  And usually a steak a week.  So... sure.

Finally awake.

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Down at 10:19.  I looked, several times, and remember this time.  Up at 18:30, give or take, just a few.

I brought pants down, to be washed.  And a few shirts.  But a shower first.  Then laundry started.  And, then, finally, the rest of the freezertop.  I did get started on that, but just failed to complete.  Fine, I'll... get it tonight.

I didn't like how the dream ended.

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Even knowing it was a dream, and being aware in it.  I couldn't change the ending, or stop it.  An... unusual event.  I don't like unusual events.  And some nightmares are far worse than others.  Some... I don't like.

A dark day.

That dream... woman.

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I don't know.  All I know is...

God gave them gifts.  I can't deny the gifts.  I have... denied them, am denying them.  But I don't want to deny them.  It denies myself as well.

A lot of sleep.

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Can't be sure when I went to bed.  Early afternoon?  Between 13:30 and 15:30?  Really, that is just a guess.  I woke up at about 22:30.  Still a bit weary?  Yes.

Coffee first thing.  And... "night" medicines, minerals, vitamins in with that.  Oh, forgot the cod liver oil.  I'll get that.  Still have fatted coffee, so that will work.  Had three eggs while at it.  Might have two more.  Not hungry, just... I'd... like to put a bit in, beside coffee.

Ugh.

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"Morning" meds in, collagen in the coffee, and a cup and a half of kefir down.  Browsing the internet, listening to music, watching videos on some topics.  Ignoring (most of) the propaganda, especially on y.t.  I do enjoy Zero Hedge, if too I ignore the articles and just go see what is kicking around in the comments section.  I can't seem to post there, so I just up and down vote things.  Or... stay away.

Yes, most of my favored bloggers are propagandists.  Some of them look to be state operated, give or take.  I know this.  If not state operated, then they took small tickets, or simply took money for an opinion?  If they aren't state actors outright.  Especially the zionists.  Their one-sidedness is too fierce.  Unless they are Israeli citizens/actors.  As an American, they should know better, by now.

Both sides of some things?

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Having a heck of a time going to sleep and waking up.  I hurt?  Numb from it, mostly.  But I know it is in there.  I just don't know why.  When living in a body which should be dead,  there is going to be pain.  But... not beyond my ability to tolerate.  Mostly, as mentioned, numb.  But I can sense it back in there.

I can't quite figure out... anything... though?  Currently, just trying to take medication, drink when thirsty, add electrolytes, add collagen, and eat... something.  Eggs and fatted coffee, for now.  It's not a lot, but it is something.  The next trick is to get sleep regulated.

Heading to bed.

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Slowly.  I've been heading to bed for... two... three... maybe four hours?  Gah.  Never mind.  I'm... still heading to bed.

I just thought of something I realized when reviewing keto, but more specifically the carnivore viewing section of y.t. videos.  And, just now, I decided to share it.