08:23

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Even with the sun  up, it is still only 52 out there.  I didn't see if it dropped below 45, but I did shut things up, a bit, and off.  Fans, doors, and windows at least partially.  Smoky out there.  At first I thought it was fog, but... no.  Smoke, from some fire, somewhere.  Fires?  And it still smells like smoke.  Sassy has calmed to it.  Knowing that it isn't something in the house.  Still, she doesn't like it.

Feeling just a bit rough.  I gamed through the evening.  Not much else I can do, for the moment.  On to bedtime.  But I am not crawling into bed, this morning.  Just going to sleep.  I've lost days... daylight.  But I'll work on getting it back.  Probably not tonight, I really need to water the lawn.  Though who knows how it will work out.

I'll say a good long prayer tonight, as I should be able to focus on not focusing.  A quiet time, as long as the rest of the prayer, longer sometimes.  Though usually I can't do more than an half hour, or I fall asleep in it.  Yes, your on the list.  Anyway, good morning and goodnight.

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Neighbor texted.  Awake?  Yep!  Just in time, but I didn't mention that.  He wanted to borrow my circular saw.  More work on a project.  It turns out, the circular saw he wanted was 7 1/4", or some such.  Mine is only a 6 1/2".  But, while we were talking, the new trimmer came up.  He is getting one, too.  A Makita.  I was sure my old one must be dead, didn't try it.

He... thought differently.  So, we went and checked it out.  He tried to start it, but... as I thought.  Nothing.  But... there wasn't a drop of gas in it.  I had some gas, so we filled it.  Popped the starter, and...  Lit right off.  He asked if he could use THAT.  Sure.  It turns out, his trimmer is on backorder.

That gas trimmer?  I bought that, from Sears, in it's original place, when it still existed, when I first moved in.  That was, say, 2009, 2010?  It's a 4-stroke, so I don't have to mix oil into the gas.  Never had a problem with the engine.  But, a switch had to be fixed on it last year.  The on switch wouldn't stay in the on position.  Amazing.  So, when I return the DeWalt trimmer?  I won't buy the other one.  Oh well.  Might... have to buy something else?  Dunno.

Anyway, now it is time for bed.

It's down to 45 out there?

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But it is 67/68 in this front room, just dropped to 74 in the main, 70/73 upstairs.  I just opened up the upstairs, and turned off some of the fans down here.  Really, I think I'll shut them all off.  Done.  And some cheese and salami.  Much less salami than last time, about the same amount of cheese.

As to that cheese?  I would rate it a 6.5 out of ten.  It IS good.  But it is a bit drier, less creamy, than I prefer.  But the salt is right.  I would gladly eat this on any given day, a few bites.  But I wouldn't think of it when thinking of a favorite cheese.  Now, it does put the mind some of my favorites.  A little less aged would, to my preferences, be better.

Just understand, tastes, literally and for music or movies or in women or wine, will vary.  Greatly.  And, for good reason.  That is, once you have acquired a deeper taste to begin.  I am... a moderate intermediate at best.  There are some cheeses I can't quite handle.  Working on it.  And, there are probably a dozen types of cheeses I haven't tasted.  While there are a thousand names of cheeses I haven't tried, the truth is, there are only just so many actual cheese types.  A gouda can go by a dozen names, and it might be something else too.  I would have to do a bit of digging, but there are only so many characteristics of cheese.  And, some suggest that Swiss cheese is NOT Swiss cheese.  I mean, in Europe, that type of cheese has a name, which is not "Swiss".  And, yet, if it has those characteristics?  How could it NOT be Swiss cheese?  Or whatever they call it there?  I see both points, and there are times where I would come down on one side, or the other, or simply wash my hands of the debate because it isn't clear to me which is right.  Then again, many times the debate is linguistic, whereas it can be technical... based in chemistry.  But who actually does chemistry on cheese, to that level?  And, most likely, there are very few bacteria, insects, and else in cheese, no matter where it is from.  Only so many are healthy, or at least not injurious in an immediate way.

Well, enough about cheese.  Probably.  Though, you do realize, cheese isn't, and never was, health food?  It can be healthy.  But it can be troublesome.  Beside the truth of dose, all things being poison beyond some unknown, possibly unknowable given variances per person, cheese was most likely accidently come to be known by people who had too much milk, set it aside... put it back, and... something strange happened.  Starving, they consumed what they must have thought was rotten milk, in some freezing winter, and... low and behold, nobody died.  Perhaps a few got sick?  Maybe those died?  But that cleared out the gene pool of those who couldn't eat cheese?  It's a story.  But, as mentioned, cheese is not, and was not designed, to be a health food.  It is merely a way to store milk longer.  Now I am done with cheese.  For the moment.

It is a pleasant night, morning now, at 05:27.  Beside turning off most fans down here. feeding Sassy, and tending her litter, well and eating... I did... something else.  Now, though, I have completely forgotten!?!  I did get a new controller on my console.  The old one was starting to do odd things.  I may see if I have parts, to try to fix that.  Who knows.

I really am feeling better.  The muscles are still tight, but they don't hurt.  I can grow, and keep, muscle.  I just can't create enough stamina to do much with it.  At the best of times, it just doesn't hurt.  At the worst of times, I have to figure out how to get off the floor, out of bed.  I simply don't have strength.  Not sure if I will ever be able to do much about it.  That time was gone, 35 years ago, I think.  Still, I... will try, until there is literally no use.  Will see, though.  Later.

I don't know what is going on in the world.  But the party seems to be over, or someone(s) are trying to shut the program down.  The elites have literally said they have no use for standard people.  If there was no God, I suppose.  But, being that there is, and are still men of God?  I don't think they have a chance.  This isn't the time of the anti-Christ.  I just... don't think so.  But, it may be a time of change.  They can force that.  The church may diminish.  The population may shrink.  But it isn't these people who will remain.

In any case, do not worry.  You, as I have said a thousand times, have a choice between fear and faith.  If you believe if fear, I suppose there is little I can do.  But I will try.  What good is fear, even if you are definitely going to die?  More so.  Let it go.  Later, or goodnight... good morning... good day.

Smoke.

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From forest or other fires, many miles away?  Or... from something inside the house?  I smelled it, looked briefly.  But Sassy has been going nuts.  It still might just be on the air.  But it may well be something overheating in the house, that I just can't find.  So... I asked a neighbor to visit, take a look.  When possible, later, so...

I could get angry at Sassy, but I won't.  One of the things she does is lets me know if I left something on the stove.  She HATES smoke.  And, yes, it might just be on the air.  But... maybe not.  It is still in the 70s, definitely a foul temperament on the wind.  It's just an ugly summer wind, but into fall?  It should be cooler here.

I see the queen has died.  It is as I remember, from my dream.  Just... a few years later.  I hadn't seen who would become king, but I was hoping it wouldn't be either of her sons.  I guess the 'throne' has gotten over his Camilla escapades.  Either that or the grandsons refuse it.  What was it someone was suggesting?  We once had empires, ruled by emperors.  Then we had kingdoms, ruled by kings (or queens I guess).  Now we have countries.  You... do know who rules those?  Though, I'm not sure which is worse.  Anyway.  I had hoped she would divorce the crown from the coe.  But... she didn't have the inclination, or power?  Too bad.  The church might be troubled, but leave those troubles to it.  Don't... wear that crown of woe, on top of the secular one.  Twice vexed, that house.  No way home from there.

Well?  I don't know.  Mobility, of the smallest sort, is difficult.  Things hurt, weakness remains.  But... I'll... push through, if I may.  If nothing else, I am grateful for the opportunity to try, again and again.  To push.  To pray.  To work when possible.  I have already lost, and He has already won for me.  I can't win, but in Him, I can't lose.  Amen.

I crashed very hard.

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A bit before 10:00, I had lost all capacity to retain consciousness.  I had hoped to stay up, to return a delivery.  But that simply wasn't possible.  I pretty much crawled up the stairs, walking wasn't quite working.  I stumbled into bed.  I did wake a few times, being warmer.  It was 75, but that felt so very warm.  Too much corn?  Maybe getting to my diabetes?  Okay, we'll stop with that.  Though, I think it might be the return of the heat?

Not so sure though.  I just checked outdoors, and it read 80.  But there was a cool wind in my hair.  It was a rather pleasant 80.  Not sure if it has come down, if I suspect so.  Though, who can be sure.  No, I know not to trust the weather stations, they always... usually... pad the numbers by ten to fifteen degrees.  But it is 82 up front, and 78 in the main?  Very strange.

Hmm, I left my suv in the driveway.  I wonder if it has become a heat sink, baking the house.  I'll put it away tonight, see.  Why did I have it out?  First, the corn.  Then... a plan to go somewhere, do something.  It... my plans have failed lately.  I can barely stand.  Failed ideas... is why it sits in the drive.  I do wonder if that isn't soaking up heat, then blasting the house.  I'll know tomorrow.  Odd how... these things can work.

I called my brother, but that went right to messaging.  I left a short hello.  Then called my mom.  It's my turn, and then some.  I'll try to remember to call Saturday.  And my mom again, say, Monday?  We'll see.  I'll do my best.

Even so, crawling out of bed tat nearly 19:00 was a hell of a chore.  Just sitting up, at first.  But actually rising from the mats was terribly difficult.  My muscles and will and else are jelly.  Still, I refused to sleep one more minute.  If I was going to break, or hurt more, or even die, I was getting out of that stupid bed!

It did hurt to get up, and out.  My muscles are so very weak.  My body and mind are tired beyond reason.  Things ache, hurt, pinch... my body is... distressed.  But, I have things to do, or try to do.  I'll say a few series of prayers through the day.  And fast.  It's been a while, not sure I can do it, but it is the idea.  I can pray, that I can do.  Plus, there are many on my prayer list.  Actually, all of you, one way or another.  More of you by name than you might suspect.  A standard prayer takes an half hour.  Some prayers, like for my mother's friend, are as short as less then a minute.  Concerns as they appear, but dailies, unless I crash to sleep, are an half hour to hour... depends on how much time I can leave open for God to do His work, answer what He will, and change things at His behest.  He is pretty good at massaging a hard heart and thick neck.  :)  Seriously.  His massage-ju is pretty good, if you let Him.

Well?  Well... on to a bit of looking around.  Then maybe some gaming if I'm not ready or able to do more.  Then, hopefully, work at some point.  Good evening, day, and perhaps night.  Be well.

Almost finally cooling.

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It has just now gotten down to 74 in the front room, near the computer.  Starting out overcast is helping as much as anything else.  It is 63 outdoors, 76 in the main.  Not sure about upstairs, but with the ac on, it could well be 68/70 in the main, a bit warmer where I sleep.  Still, it just is lowering, now, finally, to 74.  It's been an oddly warm night.  I think the ground temps have risen.  In September?  But, as has been noted by everyone and his uncle, this year, and the last several, has not been normal.

As mentioned, overcast.  I had a sense rain was coming.  Though I thought it would be in a while.  Then again, this has been "a while".  I've just not been keeping up.  Still, not sure this is it.  If I see rain, then I'll know.  Still, at least it is keeping it a bit cooler for the short bit.

I finally got a shower in.  But am so tired.  Trying to stay awake a bit longer though.  There is something I am hoping to do, yet today.

No, I haven't gotten far into the corn.  Not sure I will.  I did get two batches parboiled, but not off the cobs yet.  Will hope to get more done.  That at least.  It's a rough day.  I feel poorly, I hurt, and I am tired.  Meh.  I've definitely had worse.  Later.  Or goodnight, if I crash.

Other worlds.

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Some ugly, bad, rough.  Some much more peaceful.  If you need the latter, look at the last two.  The rest?  Well, look or don't.

A warm one.

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Still nearly 70, last time I looked.  Outside.  I have been in the other room, with this area mostly shut down, with the door open and fan going.  It is still 79 in this area.  Rough.  It was 77 in the main area.  A bit too warm.  But, so it goes.  I have been gaming, in hopes of getting something started.  I did set the big pot to a hot soapy soak.  the corn water that was in there was rather stout.  So, yea.  I have to clean it before using it to parboil, or such, the corn.

I do have three dozen, or so, ready to go.  And, should be able to get the last three or four dozen husked, cooled, and decobbed, before the night in through.

I was a day and an half off medicine.  The sleep problems made it so that I just couldn't keep track of medicine.  I am back on it.  Got an extra half back in.  But I am not going to mess with trying to get the other lost part back in.  I'll just start from there.  I wonder if stopping medicine actually helped things.  Sometimes, I suspect, the medicine just works too well.  But, falling off things by falling through the virtual floor into nowhere gets me off medicine until I can get back into shape.  Maybe, maybe.  That cold... that sense of being frigid, in the 80s and 90s, that was spooky.  I've been dead, I know what that is.  Death is cold.  Bodily.  This wasn't quite that, but it was going there, in spite of the environmental heat.

I've had even another snack of cheese.  Very small bits.  I doubt if I have eaten three ounces.  I make them very small bites.  I eat them slowly, with plenty of water.  Wine might not be bad, I just don't... really do wine all that much, or any other alcoholic sipping these days.  Oh... once or twice a year.  Maybe over a week, I'll indulge lightly.  Try to stay within keto, or have very little... such as solid draft microbrew out on my birthday.  That was rather nice.

Feeling a bit rough, but... I'll work through it.  Truth tell, I have been feeling rough for a while.  Off and on, though generally a bit worse as temps climb again, and when they are higher.  I just... forgot... that I wasn't feeling well.  Too busy trying to get things done.  Something just seems off, with the weather.  I fear it will be really warm, and then simply plunge.  It's got that tricky, wicked, treacherous, feel to it.  We'll see.  Something is terribly off, but more a weather influence contest that, most likely, can't be won.  Or... just the rich trying to destroy the middle class, with government helping.  

Governments want billionaires, and billionaires want government controls.  They think they can work together, against us or such.  Truth is, they will war before long.  As is happening in China, where they are destroying their billionaires.  It worked, until the government became jealous, or greedy, felt they were losing control.  Heck, even raping their international athletes.  Pretty wicked over there.  Our current government would love to pillage the billionaires.  Currently they are working with and for them.  If this remains, that won't last.  Funny, how billionaires think they can negotiate with zealots.  That's never how it works.

If they get rid of the middle class, the upper class is next.  Being last is not a salvation.  Funny, a lot of the wealthy don't think they are in danger.  Watching the middle class get utterly destroyed, their wealth stripped, one way or another, from inflation taxation, to actual taxation, to denying social security (not just me) and such.  Who do they think will come to their defense when politicians just take?  They are a smaller group, and are becoming hated by the middle classes, or what was that, and definitely by the poor.  They have no allies.

We'll see, but things are going to get settled, one way or another.  

Salami and cheese.

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.l

It arrived today.  I was worried, for they had just set it on the front porch, out in the absolute baking sun.  It was 90 when I woke, at 17:00... 17:30?  Maybe a bit later.  As it turns, though, the package was fine.  They had four ice type packs.  Unlike with the "sustainable" (probably toxic, and leaking) Veterans Admin corrupticrat ice type packs, these can be used after, and don't slime up the contents on the way.  Protecting their cronies from having to offer something that could be used twice?  Poisoning vets?  Who knows, but rude and crude.

Anyway, with four of those, and then those only partly thawed on top of it, the items were fresh.  I got everything stowed, save what was for supper!  I know, it's actually "breakfast", but it isn't a 'breakfast' (" " = breakfast by proximity to waking, while ' ' = breakfast by type but out of time... such as bacon and eggs at whatever time might pass for dinner or supper, relative to when I woke).  Yes, but by time of day, this IS supper.  Okay, fine, it's a supper "breakfast".  :p

Sliced, or diced, I have a fine, albeit very small, cheese and salami plate.  I usually choose the fennel based salami.  And, most of the cheeses, this time, are either goudas or similar, from slightly aged to very aged.  The one I am eating, just one at a time, is rather aged, if not the oldest.  Veins of salt, to add a bit of crunch... from being well dried.  I absolutely love those types.  While not a true gouda, as likely from the wrong country, or county within, of very similar characteristics, just aged more than gouda often is.  Still, wonderful.  It will take a week to polish off the 7 1/2 ounces.  Even of that, a small portion being rind I do not eat.  It isn't even that expensive, save shipping.  But I got that free this time.  And, it got here fast.  I am used to it taking a week or two.  Even with the holiday, it got here in four, including the holiday?  Crazy, but yes.

I may have a few more cubes of that cheese.  But that... was enough salami.  Maybe too much.  My eyes and belly never confer with memory to remember how rich that is.  Still, nice to have extra treats once in a while.  And, a sixth of the charcuterie cut... instead of a quarter!  Ugh.  I have... overdone... in the past.  Like a dog with peanut butter, I have... confused my hunger for capacity!  Getting better.  But... a bit more of that cheese.  Just two inch and an half squares, off the thinner edge, diced into quarters.  Even so, I won't have much more.  That stuff is... potent.  Let's just say, eating too much (of either actually) and you get... a pucker bomb!  Have to eat more corn!  Well, that corn is doing it's own thing.  *googly eyes*  I suppose a bit of pucker magic wouldn't be all bad.  Still... smaller bites.

I didn't get to the rest of the corn, but I got a good start, and some in the freezer.  I think I can get the rest, now, today.  I hope.  Ugh!  I am surprised it is still good, but it is.  And I'll keep trying, working, pushing.  When it isn't too cold, it is far too hot.  Today, no warmer or hotter than lately, mostly, and it feels wicked hot.  Perhaps, after a time, with it heating back above the 80s, into the 90s, it's stretching things, heating the soil, heating everything back up.  So be it.  A grace to enjoy, and work through as I may.

Artikaas Gouda Vintage, for precision.  Nope, Sassy wants none of it.  Probably a bit more aged than she prefers.  And, this is one of, if not the, oldest of the lot.  There might be another 36 month, but I thought I just ordered one in that age.  The rest are fresher.  Some are Italian, and for pasta dishes.  I have alternatives to pasta which will have to work.  

On to... waking, and some more cheese.  Oh... I'll see if Sassy will eat it.  Sometime she will, sometimes not.  Hey, it's protein based, has good fats, just that... pucker factor.  Probably like her dry food, to be honest.  Later.

Okay, some of the corn sealed.

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The water bath sealing method does seem to work.  It's a bit tricky, but... what isn't?  I just have to get the freezertop cleared, then get those in.  I think there are three dozen, maybe four.  I have... been eating it, while putting it up.  More eating, but getting some up.  It'll... get there, shortly.

It is 52 out there.  I... the ac was left on upstairs.  Wasn't feeling well.  Didn't know if I'd be going on back to bed.  So... it just is what it is.  All good though.  Down here, it is 73/68/69.  Even with the computer on, with the door open and a fan, this front room got cool.  Then again, I was gaming in the other room.  I am as much a heater as the electronic devices.

Strange as it is, I don't feel so cold, even when it is much cooler.  That was a health thing, not a weather thing.  I still don't understand, literally, how I am still alive.  It isn't a medical likelihood.  I found a stethoscope.  Couldn't hear my heart.  Nor could a visitor.  Or, he wasn't sure.  That is the medicine?  It definitely doesn't sound like a flat tire anymore.  There is that.  Not sure which is worse?  At least with a flat tire sounding heart, you know it's actually pumping.

On to get the freezer filled.  And, with the water coming to a boil, some of the other corn is likely to be to going before long.  I won't dump the water, each run.  Just give it three minutes, then put it in a bucket of cool water.  Until that water gets too warm, then just flush that water.  Corn on corn, in boiling water, especially for short runs, won't be a trouble.  Even using old corn water is fine.  Bleh.  Cutting it off the cob and bagging it will be the real work.  I'll do it on the freezertop, another reason to otherwise clear that.  And clean it if that is needed.

Yea, I might get the corn done and in tonight.  It's as fast as I could do it.

Still awake, doing alright.

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I haven't gotten to any work, yet.  But think that may happen.  I did grill some meats, and cooked corn.  Just enough for dinner.  The meats were a few very thin chops, and some thin beef cuts.  Some of the latter were fresher, some were rather old.  They looked good, but the older beef, while good of texture, the taste was... dated.  I suppose I could have eaten it.  I just decided not to do so.

The other meats were good.  All good, and the corn was very good.  I must have serious biofauna, in my gut.  I have been eating a lot of very fresh corn.  It isn't showing.  Softserve.  My body is breaking it down.  Not a single grain of corn shows.  Laxatives, but not roughage?  Very strange.

I may be going back to milk, but not to drink whole.  For kefir, again.  But, I want to make sure I have enough bottles, and that I am in shape to transfer the bits of old with new, more than... I keep losing my capacity to keep these things up.  I suppose old will work, but I wonder if things get lost.  Why back to kefir?  Because it really is a good, keto, diabetic, food.  I like it a bit more bitter than most, but... I think you get more from the bitter, if that isn't why I like it.  

For a foodie, I'm not really a health buff.  I do try to keep to keto, and maintain a reasonable diet for diabetes.  But I don't go deep.  Just... enough.  Though I need to get frozen fruits, too.  Mostly berries.  Sometimes kefir blended with berries, sometimes with even added keto sweeteners, sometimes just plain but blended smooth, or with veggies?   Works well.  I've missed it.  

Though, to be honest, I suspect what kefir has done for my guts is to make it so that it can completely crush even corn, right down to... well... softserve.  I've never had that, in all my years.  Always had grains of whole corn come out.  Even living hear, previously.  It's just been a few years since I really hit keto and then kefir.  I had stopped eating corn, for a long time, as it is said to be bad for diabetes.  Though, now?  Well... sometimes, you just have to enjoy life.

Anyway.  I am hoping to get the corn put up tonight, and maybe husk the rest.  Then, get that parboiled (or some such, boiled a few minutes, then cooled, then cut off the cob).  Then get that bagged and frozen.  It's still quite good.  I was worried, having just dropped for a few days.  But, no, still good.  Not quite yet, but soon.

I missed getting the trash out.  I just fell, hard, and couldn't get my feet.  It is sort of amazing.  I really couldn't stay awake, and was never able to get to anything.  Achy, everywhere.  But I've been achy all summer.  Arms, legs, muscles, joints.  But my organs aren't screaming.  And the pains are... more mild.  Just aches, pinches sometimes.

I am grateful for the opportunity to keep at things.  I try to ignore the pain, or just accept it.  As I have mentioned, I offer this to those in purgatory.  I have... certain ones in mind.  I hope that is where they are.  Some is for those I consider, name, some is for those poor bastards who have no one who knows their name.  I was... among them.  Close as I was, as I remember things, to the gates.  I... still couldn't move on, not just then.  Dreadful to move on, worse to not.  Fire.  But fire was seen with gratitude, just weakness.

I don't mind the pain.  I guess, if nothing else, I can farm that.  Spend it on the... lost.  A breeze, letting them know which way to go.  Some are people I wouldn't talk to here on earth, had I known them.  And, yet, I would do much to see them in heaven.  Even if I didn't get there.  It's... not as it seems.  Though, I do hope to be in heaven.  That's a God thing, like life and death.  Still, I find gratitude in being able to suffer for others.  Though, pain pills...  I have lost those?  I need to find them, take a day off every other week, or once a month.  There is peace, from time to time, too.

On... to something.  Later.

Something is a bit off.

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Started out okay.  Doing mostly okay, if not really getting to much.  Then a bloody nose.  I kept checking it, it kept bleeding.  Then?  The other nostril.  Two bloody noses, I guess.  A bit woozy, too.  Not too tired, not cold or even too cool.  But, not able to get to much.  

I have been playing games, in an attempt to jumpstart something.  I'm doing okay, if not the best... in the game.  And it isn't helping me to start other things.  Sometimes it does.  Sometimes, like this time, there is no difference between pushing and sitting... browsing.  I just made some fatted coffee.  Haven't had that in a while.  Not interested.  Mostly drinking plain, if reverse osmosis, water.

I would like to water the lawn, but I just can't get to it tonight.  Tomorrow?  I can hope.  I will get to corn, if it kills me, tonight.  It's still 81 in this front room?  I opened up and turned on the more powerful fan.  It was 72 outside, so it's just not all that cool?  Well, it's only 21:23.  It feels later, but it's not.

It's rough.  Just not sure what has gone wrong.  I am probably only warm because it is actually hot and I am wearing to layers on my legs.  I fear getting cold and crashing, or just crashing.  So tired.  Energy levels could drop in a heartbeat.  I don't know.  More gaming, with a timer.  I'll see if I can get to somethin in a couple hours.  I just can't right now.  Later.

Awake, again, for... a while?

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Up at around 17:00.  It got really hot up there.  It was 79, when I looked.  Impossible to sleep in, yet I still couldn't wake.  So, I shut things down, turned on the ac, and went back to bed.  So tired.  Usually so cold.  I slept with two layers for bottoms.  Even then, I was chilly.  No socks, because those, somehow, sometimes, can make it seem even colder.  I don't understand how, only when.  And, that when is when I am cold from illness.  That is what the problem is.

A lot of sleep recently.  I suspect, before midnight, I'll be down again.  It is 90 outside.  Not sure if it was hotter earlier or not.  But that is still pretty warm.  76/78/79 downstairs, and 73/76 upstairs (in part because the door to the downstairs was left open when I turned the ac on.  I shouldn't be feeling frigid.  Now, currently, I am not.  But... it might return as the temps begin to fall.  It's like my body feels the cooling, hops on, and just coasts down into the cold... well beyond the real marks.

Several calls.  But I don't know the numbers, no messages.  I hate that.

Today?  Whatever I can do.  Might not be much.  Later.

I'm not going to make it.

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I was never really able to fully wake.  And I won't really wake up.  Not... quite yet.  I am falling back to sleep, and there is almost nothing I can do about it.  Not too cold, mostly.  But there is something that feels cold, inside.  Adding more clothes won't help this.  It's... a health thing.

So, back on to bed.  Have a great day, anyway.  I will, if I can ever wake up.  I have things to do, and will get to them as possible.  God speed, and design.  I made it to 06:47.  Up a few hours, anyway.  Goodnight.

I couldn't stay awake.

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Shortly after the last post, I felt so cold I couldn't stay awake.  So, on up to bed.  I crawled in.  I... can't be sure when?  22:30?  20:30?  19:00?  After the last post, but not by long.  A quick check... the last post was started at 19:47.  So... yea.  What a crash.  Down so very hard.  So cold.  Couldn't stay conscious.  Reminded me of when I have been in shock, only without the pain, or... after the pain had passed.

I woke around 02:30?  Yea, about then.  It 2as 74 near me, 73 in the main of the room.  Odd.  Usually it is three degrees cooler out in the room.  It was still 79/81 up front here, and about 77 in the main.  So, yea, I opened things up a bit and turned on some fans.  Just been awake for a short bit, but has cooled a bit in here.  While 81 seemed cold, when I went down, 77 feels rather warm even now, with the fans going.

I didn't get corn going.  I'll do that shortly, unless I crash again.  But, probably.  I did check it, it seems okay, still.  But I best get going.  I have filled a smaller bin of water, to attempt to make the packages as airtight as possible.  Popping popcorn for something quick and warm to eat.  If I have coal, I'll do some grilling as well, later.

This time, I put on two layers of bottoms, of course on top of unders.  If just a muscle shirt for now.  I can always add a second shirt, or jacket.  But, so far, all is good.  Socks, too.  Though, I think the sensation of cold was the heart just... being tired.  I pushed last week, and then last night.  It adds up and can, and did, take me down.

Tired, worn.

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Fair enough, now.  I was up way late, both working on the corn, and looking for the scope.  I completed neither task, but that doesn't mean I didn't do everything I could do, and more.  I definitely overdid things.  Then, it was too cold upstairs, and too hot when I came down, and is getting too cold again, down here.  I had to put on thick pj bottoms over else, and were a jacket while working on the corn.

I just checked outside.  It read 79, but feels like 73.  It's cool out there, for being so warm.  And while it feels cool, at 76 in the main area, at least it feels warm in this front room at 82.  But I was in the living room, at 76.  So, not sure why 79 feels so cool.  Strange days these days.

I am still trying to get things together.  I did sort out the litter boxes.  But next I need to sort out the corn.  First what is ready, and then on to what needs worked a bit more.  Much of it is bagged, ready to have the air pushed out of it, then frozen just on the cob.  But the cobs needing blanched, and cooled, then cut off, remains.  I am pretty sure I can finish it up tonight.  Hopefully before it gets just plain cold out there.

I just... I need to get going.  I may have to push through.  I may not feel like it, all night.  I was up way too late, yesterday, and really did exhaust myself.  Still, it's a good thing.  I just wish the price wasn't so severe so often.  Later.

Some of it.

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I got, say, seven dozen ears husked, plus.  I may well end up with three or four more dozen yet to do.  I didn't get them frozen, but will.  Chief Nose Wetter had something up, a video, about how to get water out of the bags, as one is freezing things for winter.  Ah, not the same video, but it will do.  I'm glad I watched this one.  I was wondering what would be large enough.  A bucket will do.  In the tub.

Well?

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Had some corn to hand off.  And, since he was going shooting, I handed off a couple of rifles.  Not for tonight.  I looked around for my scope, was hoping to hand that out too.  Nope.  Or, not yet.  I have been looking for it since.  Well, when I can.  I can't believe it isn't showing up!

As well, I have been husking corn.  So far, three and an half dozen ears.  I only have... six or seven more... dozen.  Ugh.  Still, I will get it done tonight.  Will I get the parboiling, or such, done, and all?  Maybe not.  I should get some of it, and the on-cob corn, sorted and frozen.  So, with half going to on-cob, and if I could do half the half to be decobbed, I could maybe get through three quarters of it?  Maybe.

I am about to have six ears.  Cooking them to munch.  He had some very small ones he was just giving away.  I didn't want to take too many, but I did take six of those.  If too, I bought three extra dozen, to help him out.  It's not a lot, but it was something.  Those are on to good homes tonight.

Feeling better.  Not great, but not nearly as poorly as I had been.  Not sure why I felt bad or got better.  Though I'll say, this... was minor.  I haven't felt truly terrible in a long time.  My organs haven't been hurting, my ribs haven't felt torn, so many things I have suffered just aren't a problem anymore.  I suspect it is the medicine.  I am finally on the right stuff, and at a level I can usually maintain.  I can take it, handle taking it, and it works... or well enough.  It won't ever get me back up on my feet, but it will make the dying process a lot less painful.

Well, I best check on the corn.  Perhaps I'll watch a movie, while eating.  It seems y.t. has absolutely stopped putting up new vids.  My social credit score is horrible... for their Chinese masters.  So be it.  Later.

Not feeling well.

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Slight nausea.  A bit tired.  It is 81 here, near the computer, still.  Has been since at least 17:00, 16:00?  That isn't the problem, though.  As I feel cool.  Very strange, but... well, not cool, how about comfortable?  Temperaturewise.  It is 74 outside, but oddly warm for it?  Very odd.  Still, I have opened up the door, to let air in.  We'll see.

I am hoping to get to corn yet tonight.  I'd like to have it all put up by the time I go to bed.  Will see.  That'll be a lot of husking.  But with half of it going to on-cob, or more, it shouldn't be too bad.  I'll have a few ears, for food, while at it.  Then it'll be a while.  Maybe a bag of each type, per month, through the winter.  Two if it turns out well, and it seems I have enough.  Three packages a month would require thirty packs, to get me to next June.  Though I don't think corn is up until later in July, is it?  Not sure, but... I think locally.

A bit of gaming, first.  Something to eat would be good.  I have chops thawed, and several other meats, which could be grilled.  I'll get the grill going, while I game.  Sounds good to me.  I just... that bellyache, or upset stomach, not sure.  Perhaps food will solve it.  I'll eat, either way, in a bit.  Good evening.

Crashed, hard.

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It was too cool, this morning.  And I couldn't... work my way through it.  Around twelve thirty, on through to maybe thirteen thirty?  Somewhere in there I crashed hard.  Maybe even earlier, or later.  I just don't know.  I looked at the clock down here, and up there, several times, but the time just wouldn't stick in my mind.  Up around 16:30, give or take a quarter?  Something.

Awake now, more fully.  But it is 78 down here, in the front room.  And it is 92 outside?  Which is probably as warm as it got, probably.  Probably as warm as it will get too.  Probably.  It was 73 near me, 68 into the room, upstairs.  Odd, the large difference.  Then again, usually I don't sleep in the hottest part of the day, either.  Oh, and 74 in the main of the house still, which I was finding a bit too cool to remain awake earlier.  Odd.  Both odd that it is still that cool, and that it crashed my systems.  But... all good.

More dreaming about that island.  Exploring it, but exploring what happened too.  Everyone else, to some degree, was in on it.  I didn't really care, to be honest.  I was just trying to sort out how deep the hatred.  For some it was just a game, for others it was with full intent, even to do harm and cause financial discomfort.

A beautiful town, all of stones.  From houses to shops to streets.  Not updated, almost at all.  Electrical runs, though, modern sewage equivalents but of ancient techniques.  Vistas, overhangs, parapets, and city and castle walls.  It was a marvel of very old engineering.  Merely, for the most part, kept up.  I suspect they were keeping it on the basis of a prophecy.  A place for people, one day, in which again to dwell and live.

I could... feel out the minds, of the monks and nuns.  Initially they had been tasked with simply keeping the prophecy implications going.  But those who don't believe, don't do well.  So, over time, they found monks, nuns, and priests who believed.  Brought them in, and put them in charge.  And, finally, the place was managed with diligence.  Modernized with electricity, had water works replaces to remove all lead, and made the place into a fully functional city-state, with even arms and other things for the new population.

The reason the archbishop chose this place was because of another black bishop.  Not black skinned, souled.  There were many archbishops and bishops ordained here, most were of the right sort.  But this one chose to be ordained here because of a particularly infamous one among the right ones.  As mentioned, if I had known which one was to be ordained, I would not have been there.  

They say dreams can't, or don't, recur or carry on.  I... don't think the experts are very expert.  They certainly don't understand my dreams.  And, I doubt if I am all that unusual.  I'm too blasé to even be unique or interesting in any particular way.  Mostly just waiting around to die.  Don't have time to be interesting or exciting.  Heck, I can't even stay awake, without probably showering and dressing more warmly, on a low 70s degree day!  Like an old dog, needing the fired cast oven to be near, just to... stave off the cold of death.

Anyway... I am up!  Sassy has been fed.  Her litter cleared.  I'm hoping to hit the corn tonight.  Oh, my mother did blanch, then cool, the corn... when cutting it from the cob.  But, on the cob, she just cleared and cleaned that, and put six in a gallon bag.  She used to add sugar, but I think stopped doing that.  With better corn, it isn't needed.  That would more be for field corn, when it was edible?  Or before they really made it sweet?  Or just the old ways.  When the .gov was pushing sugar on us.

A shower, too, sometime.  I refilled water jugs between this morning and since waking.  The water purifier had been offline, so as to get in the freezer.  Actually, I still need to get in there, so I won't be doing a whole lot more on that top, and need to clear it again.  Oh, but the work I have been doing on the water softener?  That has helped with the reverse osmosis.  Now, it uses almost all of the water in the reservoir, rather than two thirds.  And, there is no salty residue.  So... yes, it worked.  Still, one more shot, at the end of the month.  Amazing how things differ with a bit of work.  And, how easy and inexpensive things are.  Some things.

The next physical house project is to begin going through drawers, sanding them, and spraying them with clear spray paint.  Well, will try a few, see if that really works.  If so, I'll continue.  It is rather inexpensive.  Whereas shellac is expensive as heck.  Or... seems to be.  At $35 a quart?  Ugh.  Then again, who knows.  Maybe a quart would outlast the six spray cans by a mile?  Will find out.  Well, sanding, spraying, and maybe putting up mesh to keep critters out.  Only had it happen once, but... was disturbing.  

Though, any of that, other than corn, today?  I just don't know.  Maybe.  Later. 

What a strange night.

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I did get to bed early.  Perhaps 21:30?  But I awoke around 23:30 to 00:30?  Sometime in there.  Then was awake until 04:30ish?  Pretty close.  I am waking, again, right at 11:00, as I sit.  It was 73/73 upstairs, is 70/71/72 down here, while already up to 82 outside?  And a hot feeling 82.  All good.

This is the earliest I have been up for three to five days.  While not perfect, and it took a bit of a jog, I... am pleased.  I hope to do even better in time.  Though, maybe I have lost the day.  Hard to know, up front.

My mother was telling me that a friend of hers, there, is ill.  And it may be her time of passing.  At 97, she just... is tired.  And is ready to go.  My mother is a big girl, and understands.  But... would miss her.  If she wouldn't say anything.  She spent the last night in with her.  And was a bit out, from trying to sleep in the recliner, I suspect.  It is what friends do.  I've been praying for them off and on.

I didn't tell her, but... we don't get that choice.  Or... I would have been gone a long time ago.  We don't get to choose the time.  Even if we fudge, attempt a mulligan, or others do it, it isn't up to us wee ones.  Is it God who decides, or does He have a system that decides?  Or, maybe, a bit of both?  I don't know.  But I... merely prayed for them in their hours of concern, for their concerns and God's will.  I can do no more or less.

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Oh, and a dream.  I was invited to go to a cardinals ordination?  It was to be a small event.  Out, on an island, in a once city.  A place which had been full of life, until it was mostly passed by.  It was, thence, kept functional and restored by monks, as a respite for pilgrims, a place for tired priests and such to go, the monastery and a nunnery, both putting in to keep the place functioning and available.  But, for the most part, empty much of the year... say a 1200 century castle keep and city.

If I had known which archbishop was set to become cardinal, I would not have gone.  But, there I was, with the rest of a group.  As the new cardinal was grasping hands, as part of his initiations, he suggested with surprise that I had warm, friendly, hands.  His eyes... got large, in surprise.  Anyway, the ceremony ended.

Me and another fellow were new to these things, and were the last ones out.  As we were going, they shut the doors in front of us, each of us going a different way.  We had to fiddle with our own doors, to get them open.  By then, the horse-draw carriage that had brought us was thundering down the way.  There had been something in their eyes, when they rushed out.  This was planned.

Now, being who, what, I am... I had studied the island.  I knew that the carriage had to go down many streets, in a circular fashion, many times around, for the road was circular.  There was no straight way to the piers.  As well, I knew, at the circularity of the roads, they couldn't keep up speed.  It would take them an hour or two to get where a pedestrian could get in half an hour or less.  If one knew their way, and I did.

So, I instructed the second fellow with me to meet me at the pier, and give him the simple instructions.  I got to a place where the carriage would have to go quite slow to round, a particularly sharp turn.  Then I waited, letting on as it came by.  I then asked what the deal was, why they were left.  And was told if I didn't quite get it, or remember to now.  But it was leftists being mean, basically.  I suggested they go back, and pick them up.  Only then did they realize who I was.  And, well, they did go back.

I got off, as they were heading back around.  And, I made it to the pier.  I told the captain to go on.  There would be only one trip to shore tonight.  He asked about the others.  I merely said, if they were here, they would be here already.  Not... a lie.  So, we went on.  At near the shore, he got a call and was about to turn.  I just shook my head at him.  After he let us off, he could go on back.  I let him know it wasn't an option.

Then, when to shore, we got into the bus, and told them to take us on to the airport.  They, too, asked about the others.  I just, again, said if they were there, they would be going.  More a reality statement than an idea about any truth.  And, it was true.  So, we went on to the airport, caught our flights, and were home before you knew it!

The others?  Oh... some were a bit hot under the collar.  I just said, what's up, Doc.  One thought about coming to blows.  I just asked him, if I was a threat to him, if I tried to enter his business field, as a competitor.  He said of course not.  So, I told him, that was the same about him physically threatening me.  He... understand, and calmed his jets.

Me and the other fellow, and some of the other truer Catholics, had a chuckle about this for years.  The others didn't try games again.  Apparently, they all had other things they need to be home to do, and missed by three days their other duties and attendances.  From archbishops' affairs, to business and family deals, to other such.  Not my problem.

What a strange dream.  Amen.