Odd.

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As strange as it may seem, being back to gaming is quite good. It is a simple thing, the game. Or it can be as complicated as you like it. In theory, there is a best way to situate your character, arm it, use skills and spells in a specific order, which along with a few other variables produce the best results. Limits on availability of armor, weapons, gems (which enhance the equipment), and other things such as drink and food (or the resources by which to make those if you choose to spend time skilling up in cooking, fishing, and your willingness to hunt for certain meats). So, either sit back and just play for your own entertainment, or set up your character for grouping or raiding (again, groups are two to five people, raids are ten to twenty five people). So, I have a choice. Actually, I have several choices.

Since I have one main high level character and a bunch of minor characters, I can pick which way I will go on any particular day or part of a day. If battling hard for little or nothing, or so it seems, in higher level groups, I can always switch off to one of my lowbies (as I call them, my lower level players). Then I simply do quests all by myself or do lower level groups.

My guild is not very active. This is unfortunate. I would love to find a guild that works together often, on raids and in groups, and moves on to the parts of the game which require a solid, large, well diversified, guild. Actually, one of our fellow bloggers has offered this to us readers. The blogger in question is attempting to create an eighty man guild to run through the next game addition. I am working on a few things which might make joining more comfortable, and private, for me.

It sure beats simply blogging, reading other blogs (when you all deign to write! (though I understand... I used to work, and can only imagine working and having a family)), reading the "news", researching, and watching the stupidifier tube. Since I can do little physical, at the moment, I have little else to do. Hmm, now I might just turn off the cable television feed. Oh, and the telephone. Stupid phone, I hooked it back up as one business needed to call my landline for security. I just got a message for some woman, a prerecorded phone call. I did not bother to listen to it or deal with it. At least I have not been getting half a dozen or more wrong number calls a day lately. Still, it is useless to me since it will not work without electricity because the phone works through a cable modem, the only reason to have a landline is for utility when all else fails. (I got it installed because, by doing so, with it's cost through the requirement, it saved well more than half on the installation ($350 otherwise for installation went down to $120 in phone costs).

Well, time to... do something else. I can only really play for just so long. A little cleaning, a shower, and perhaps a shopping list for recipes that I am considering. That should do it. Then back to gaming. Later.

Bed time.

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And glad for it. I did very little, cooked a couple of meals was about it for actual work. I did play the game a lot today. Stretching my day and trying to pull together the ability to make goals and stick with them. And, to that end, I was quite successful. I am also looking over a few gifts, online, between gaming. It is not much, but it is what I can do. I think I will be going in to town soon, for shopping and maybe shooting if the weather clears up enough to allow access to where we shoot. I will get the recipe for a pork roast, using the pressure cooker, and perhaps something else for on the side. A perfect reason to have my shooting friend over.

Not much beyond that. Though I do notice I only have a bit more than a week to prepare the house. So, I best get to it. A room a day, or two if I can. That and staying on top of dishes, looking over a few recipes to decide what I will need to stock for provisions, and whatever else seems to come along and require work or other tending. That is as good as it gets. When this visit is over, I can then back off, try to save up some cash, and just relax a bit until spring, when my mother will be visiting. After that, I think I will take next year off from visitors and visiting, at least really long range visiting.

Good night.

At 7:00, all was well.

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And it remains well, to this day? Well, if life were a German fable, it would. But by 8:00, it is all still good. :p A few boiled eggs, a little milk, the kitteh cats got a little food and attention, and it is all still good. Thankfully, I have no gastro-intestinal disorders following yesterday. Then again, even when I used to eat like a king on that day, I never truly suffered. Some critters were simply designed to eat like that. I am one of those.

I am not sure what will happen today, though I know I need to start doing the little things in preparation for my lady friend. Oh, I think she would be fine with life as it is here, mostly. She knows me and knows how I am. It is clean, mostly, just rough around the edges. And, even clean, it will be a little rough as the kitchen is dated and the furnishings are those of a bachelor. Still, it is my intent to have the place neatened up and sorted for a friendly warm visit. She still does not understand why I chose to remain friends, I think, nor why she chose to accept. I think she understands that there is a level of maturity and concern on my part, something that does not fit love and such as she has known it. Most people, I think, see love as disposable, much like most modern technological devices or, actually, most anything commercially available. I guess that is not who I am.

Have you ever watched the shows where people do extraordinary things in order to survive very odd events? People walking through deep snow, swimming freezing rivers, navigating in ways that they should not really understand, and making it back to civilization and life? I watch these and always say, Bah! I would not do that! And yet, actually, I have. Many times. I cannot base it on the will to live though, it is more that I do not know how to die properly. I have never felt that I did anything out of the ordinary and it never felt like work or a strain. I sometimes have to wonder if God merely took the steering wheel. Or allowed the animal part of me to do so. For, as I said, I would not work that hard in spite of the fact that I have. One never knows, though, the next time, whether it will happen again. Still, for the moment, I am here and fine.

Another thought is, does blogging about something cause business to change something for the better (or worse)? I complain and nag, and sometimes things change. Others have commented on similar events. It seems like people really do read these blogs, including the people who run businesses. Then again, I have seen no proof of such. I have seen things change though. Paranoid, as one blogger put it. Yes indeed. But paranoia does not mean something is not true, either. Just... running a thought through the netisphere.

Well, time to... I dunno... begin waking up to see what I should do and be getting done. Have a great day.

Happy Thanksgiving.

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I have no plans for today having already had my Thanksgiving meal. I would have liked to have made a turkey or smaller fowl, but between watching my nickels and not thinking ahead well enough, I will make due and easily in another manner. Actually, I did have some fowl of sorts this morning. Chicken gizzards and hearts make a very good meal and treat for me. And so it was. Who knows what will end up for meals throughout the day, though I think I will do just fine.

I really do hope people find themselves honestly being able to find things in there life for which to be very thankful. Life may not be perfect, there may be serious problems, there are threats both domestically and abroad, and the list of concerns can seem never ending and arrive in a broad array of topics. Which, actually, can be something to be thankful for if viewed one way. What would life be without something to challenge, something to test, something to add the salt of work and planning to the sugar of success?

I live alone. Only two people know me well enough to call me and do so irregularly at that. I am not rich and will never become wealthy. I am disabled, confused at times, and deal with several health issues. And I am grateful every day I wake, no matter how many times, only occasionally dampened by headaches or too much confusion or exhaustion. I like being alive, enjoy company when it arrives, enjoy solitude when that is what is at hand if my felines tend to make solitude a bit of a thing of the past. I am glad I did not die in those many opportunities to die I have had. Life is good. Humbling, frustrating, confusing, complicated, and good.

If you are a alone and feel lonely for it, call someone. The technology of today is remarkable that way. Get online and write a blog or comment at the many blogs who will be celebrating the day. Spread the cheer. You might be surprised at how high the returns on that are. Though I might make another suggestion. Do not let this day pass and just forget it. Like Christmas, let this day not be a singular event but turn it into a way of life. Be thankful every day, and share that.

Just... Have a happy Thanksgiving. Then remember it through the years.

Yum!

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Hungry but with no meat thawed, my bad, I decided to do something with eggs. Fried eggs are great, but not all that tasty. Sure, you can do this and that with them, or add spices (which I have few of at the moment, not yet on top of that game yet), or add them to other things. I have few neat little items in my kitchen currently. Having just moved in this summer, with so many things going on and needing to be done, my pantry has not been stocked as I would like it and have had it. That takes time, years I am guessing. It really does.

Still, I thought about the project while my stomach let me know that my brain was on a short leash. Feed me or the gray matter gets it, was pretty much what I was getting. Still, being slow to act, I let notions come and go, looking at options, and taking my sweet time, until it hit me. Scrambling the eggs seemed like the best plan. But what else? Ah, browning the edges of onion in butter, then laying in the eggs! Oh, and bacon and toast. It turned out perfect, simple as it all really is if that is not the point.

I am, however, quite hungry for meat. Not eggs, not fish, not chicken if that does technically pass for meat, but real meat, red meat. If I do not eat that in large enough quantities and often enough, no matter what else I eat I am left with a huge insatiable hunger. I do prefer beef, but lamb (fresh young lamb, not mutton!), venison, and a few others will do to a degree and for a while. I actually need beef. I suppose I can technically live on the other meats, or even beans and rice. Think zombies and brains, almost literally, then change it to me and beef, almost.

So, the next time I am in town, I am going to stop at the butcher shop. I have been living low and using my money in other ways. Fine, fine, but now I have to get beef and keep it in stock. Roasts, steak, hamburger, stew meat, offal to include brains if I could get it and blood if I knew of a place where I could get it fresh and warm. Yes, I know, odd. But that is how it is.

Well, the eggs worked and it was satisfying given what I have. The onions were a treat in there. As plain as even that sounds, it was wonderful. Bacon does not hurt almost anywhere it is present or however it might be fixed either.

Later.

Troubles.

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My current favorite game is having major revisions. A new addition to the game is getting ready to come online. All settings, and there are many, including armor types, spells, attributes, and the various "trees" (each class (warrior, mage, etc.) can be one of three types, and vary beyond that by choosing lower levels of the tree from less activated trees... yes, confusing). Okay, that is one character. I have 10 on my main part of the game and another 10 to 12 on other parts. Every time I check in after an update I am having to reset my characters, and blindly.

There are people who devote themselves to figuring out which tree, attributes, and such are best for a particular need or want. Let us say I have a druid, and I want to solo. Or, let us take that same druid and consider that I might want to group or raid (grouping is 5 players, raids are groups of groups... so can be up to, what, 25 players). There are different set-ups for these different choices. You can change these, for a price. However, at this point, and with continual change, it is impossible to know how to set up a character. It will settle, more, in time. However, changes happen continually, even without a singular major event like an addition. So, I am... simply lost. Oh, and after making everyone a bit too powerful they have nerfed (devalued) the upgrade and maybe more than taking it back to what it was. I have no idea what works best and am nervous about how well I will be able to solo (do quests and fight alone).

To boot, the system is shutting down for another revision or a reset as I write. That is part of the reason I am writing, or I would be playing. Usually, on Tuesday, they do all of the updates. Sometimes, like today, they have to shut everything down and go back and make corrections to the game, add nerfs, or other things.

Are you lost yet? I know I am. I am hoping something will normalize and stabalize before too long. I am guessing, however, since they are being so ambitious with the changes, that this will not happen for months, perhaps a year or more even. I am hoping, before too long, to be able to just hop on and play without worrying about having to reset all of my characters again, only to know that the next update will require me to do this all over again, and without any real support from the players who do the numbers because they cannot possibly keep up with major weekly shifts. Yeah, best guess is fine, to a degree. But in such a competitive environment, it is tricky.

I suppose I will look through the blogs and see what is going on, checking in to see when the game is back up and what has changed because of the outage. Arghhhh!

Oh, another thing though on a different topic. I read today that a dog is smarter than a cat. And, in some ways, that probably has some version of truth with it. Here is my deal with that concept, cats can survive on their own and very well, dogs cannot. I guess this is akin to suggesting that a microbiologist is smarter than a woodsman. While many tests might prove that to be true, without the gut-wrenching foolishness of modernity to uphold the useful idiot, the scientist could not figure out how to start a fire to cook the food that could not be caught. Smart, very. That does not even include dealing with aggression (from any source) related to surviving in a real (harsh) world in obtaining a place to sleep, water, or any other need. Smarter? Really? Let us play. (And, no, naked aggression based on secular zealotry will never win against tried and proven combat skills and mindset, and when it comes right down to it, that will happen, period. *BAM*) Though you can train a dog, you cannot train it to survive well by itself. Cats are not all that trainable, but they do not need to be. Sometimes brains get in the way, though they make a fine fat for those with hunger and a little zip. And those little dogs? Cat food...

Either I live in a plains valley or the weather services were wrong.

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Take your pick. Personally, I am guessing I live in a plains valley. A few inches of snow and some serious cold from an arctic blast is what I am seeing. Oh, right, I best turn on a bit of heat. It is a bit chill even for me. It did snow heavily last evening. It sounded and looked like there was some wind and gusts as well. Very nice, at least if there remains no need to travel in it.

I finished the dishes, mostly, but not until this morning. On the good side, I cleaned the new devices I purchased yesterday. My gravy boat and gravy fat separating measuring cup are clean and put away. Even with all the cupboard space, along with my inability to store things sanely, leaves me running out of space. At least in the kitchen. A bit of a reorganization and using other area cupboards would help, but, yeah. I do not do such things.

Oh, and my computer game is now working and well. I am thinking of removing the other version from my fast main bootup hard drive, but I am nervous about that. I think I have it scheduled to work on the new hard drive, but I am never sure about these things. Always, doubts. Always. I can also set up some other games on the new drive though too. Games are something I can do when I can do little else, they help me stay awake and longer if too they might tend to stretch my awake time too much. Sum total, they are very good and more so during down times of whatever cause.

My lady friend has found the information she needed from my email account and is prepared to visit this fall, early winter, whatever it is supposed to be when she arrives. I think the parks will be closed, after this much snow, but I will be checking. If nothing else a drive through some of the mountain valleys (canyons) is quite doable. There are some beautiful, if you have a notion to such things, vistas, lakes, and mountains very close by. I am hoping the state part I took my mother to visit is open though. It is the finest view of the Great Salt Lake available, to my way of thinking. If not, perhaps we can drive around the thing, though I have not really seen a road just for that. Because of the decline, and occasional expansion, of the lake, it is difficult to create a tour path to see it around the circumference. It will be good to see her.

I did not get to the snow blower, and doubt if I will need to do so. Looking out this morning, I was rather displeased about one thing. I left the Xterra out! I never do that. Ah well, it will give me room to tinker with the snow blower when I get to it, sometime today. I think that is why I left it out and then became too tired and forgot. Bah!

I am not sure what is going on with politics, though I have some notions. The liberals are either purposefully trying to kill their party, or they are trying to do every single thing that they stand for as they lose power, or the political world has lost the collective mind it created. Let me see, pat downs for juveniles, letting muslims go through without those same patdowns, the Dream Act, taxes, foreign policy, hmmm, well, actually, anything they are trying to do, enforce, create, draft, push, or pull, actually. They are in meltdown mode and either have no means of changing it or simply will not change the path. The only thing that surprises me is how many non-liberals (those who are not secular zealots) either do not care or are in agreement with what is happening. Such is the makings for the death of a true democratic republic.

Well, back to waking up. Have a good day. If it is snowing, make snow cones, snow angels, or snow balls and forts. If it is sunny, get out, even if just to a chair on your porch. If it is raining, have some tea and meditate to the pitter and patter of the life-bringing liquid. If all you have is five minutes for such, use it wisely. You will never have it back. Me? Meh, I am going to sit in the dark and grump. No worries, it makes me happy on the inside. Bah!

In and safely back.

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With time to spare. It has not started to snow yet, which is fine by me. I do not mind driving in the snow or while it is snowing. If I were the only one on the road, I would mind it not at all. I do not trust most drivers. Too many of them have their phone out and are talking or texting, even here. That madness really needs to end somehow, and I would support devices being put in automobiles so that phones could not be used while the engine is turned over. Simply put, driving is a privilege, driving while impaired for whatever reason is an abuse of that privilege. Well, that is it for barking.

I picked up my friend and we went shopping first. Wal-Mart had the siphon I wanted, and I bought another for the water tanks. No, I will not recycle gas for water, or the reverse. I also bought some large candles for backup heat and perhaps minor cooking, an oven thermometer, and some gas stabilizer and engine cleaning stuff. Then I went to the chef store and purchased a gravy device (measuring cup with a spout to separate fat from fluid), a gravy boat, and an apple slicing device. Yes, yes, but they have been on my list for some time and... so that is that.

So many bloggers are being so quiet, I am wondering. Then again, as the holidays hit, those with families or places to go are busy and those like myself often pipe down as they turn to reflection, and sometimes it is a painful time. The weather is moving in as well, the sun is not smiling so often or so halefully, and I suppose even if this was not a season of holiday meant to be shared with the stresses that produces, the season itself can swallow one whole. Not me, not this year, not now. If I am doing poorly in some ways, I am quite pleased, very thankful, grateful to many and to God, and, really, a bit annoyingly chipper. That whole Doom thing sometimes slips my grasp. *gasp* Bah, I will be back, more bitter and gruesome than ever. Give me a break, even Christ had a couple of down days. (Though, knowing Him as I feel I do, He was whistling while He worked, even there. Brothers and Lords sometimes!)

Well, uhrm, later. I will let you know if God has set things in motion such that a heavenly deluge of white stuff is loosed or not. Hmmm, snow angels? Yeah. Oh, and just maybe... cat and kitteh snow angels! *evil grins* Here kitteh, kitteh, kitteh!

So many projects.

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I have, after consideration, decided to craft a B.O.B. for in my vehicle, perhaps an enhancement package for that at the ready as well. Though I will not be traveling, often, far, or in the event of a cataclysm at all probably, I will do some shorter distance traveling. Then, why a B.O.B.? Because I travel in a place where most of the year is winter and the temperatures are below freezing. Beyond that, people being who and what they are, cell phones, and the general idiocy of modernity, the B.O.B. may be useful to one of "those people". Around here, I will help even "those people", mostly.

I will be setting up my B.O.B. slightly differently, of course. Who in a desert needs a candle, as a cooking device, a little fuel for that, and means of lighting a fire should suffice. Sure, it gets cold there too, but candles are better for enclosed spaces and any tent a desert B.O.B. might contain will not be of the roomy sort. Food, water supplies, and some other things will be shared and common. I am going through what is needed and wanted at this point. As the blizzard approaches, I might buy a few things for the home and car while in town. Care is needed. I could lose electricity and heat. (Though the block captain suggested, if need be, I could stay with them should I lose everything, and I might considering I am a bit shy on immediate prep (or other) funds at the moment...)

Something else I have been thinking about. While the idea of having guns is great, and it is, and for many reasons, there is more to contemplate with the deal. Whether people are active hunters, into plinking or more serious target shooting, own firearms for self or social defense, or simply to have (so long as they at least know how to use them), I am all good on all of that. (Though safe queen aficionados tweak my bill... a personal thing.) The thing to keep in mind is that good guns, even the best, but most surely the lovely pieces, need LOTS OF CARE. You cannot simply shoot a gun forever without one of a number of problems showing up. All of my .22 firearms require a ton of work. After a few hundred rounds, all of them become at least cranky. At worst, they will no longer fire. Actually, what is worse is an intermediary situation in which they will misfire much more frequently. You cannot reload these rounds, and they may not be easy to replace. Get used to keeping your firearms up to spec. Just a thought I felt necessary to pass on. And, no, it is not always easy to clean all of the guns you might own. Learn what is needed to take it down and at least try to get the thing running again. Buying commonly fallible parts is also wise, along with extra springs for the gun and for any magazines. Geez but the bills pile up, the work load gets heavy, and the risk becomes real otherwise. Take care or prepare to have a pretty club.

I best get going. I should call my friend and see if he wants to do a food run. It is not much, but it will end up being what of a Thanksgiving either of us will have in season. And, you know what, I am good with that. A friend, some food, and no one (I know of?) trying to kill me and no one on my short list. It really is all good, gravy for a fact. Oh, and I can warm up and shower if I want to shower. And, wake-up call is on my command, within my limits. Hmmm, oh, and I can have a beard, even long hair if I wanted it. And women are as available as I am willing to get off my couch, even if only friends though I think there is much more available. Bah... I said "women". *mumble*

Later. Thankfully at that.

Up and early.

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Actually, I have already had bacon and eggs, and used my new vacuum coffee pot to make coffee. I used that coffee to mix with hot cocoa mix and milk to make a tasty warmer and might have another before I shower, shave, and ship off to town. And, I will do the dishes before I head out. There is more snow out there but not all that much.

My plans for the day are to try and get the snow blower working and be ready in case we get that possible eight to sixteen inches of snow. I am not quite sure what they mean when they say mountain valleys. There are three zones here, I gather. Mountain, mountain valley, and valley. And of course there is north, central, and south, with east and west used occasionally but more rarely than to include my area. Though I listened to the news when I first arrived and since, the weather had little correlation with my needs until now. And, just as now, it was a confusing mosh of mixed up terms for areas, with the few reference towns often being unknown to me (if that part remains). Throw in that, what, one third to one half or even three quarters of the time news weather is wrong and... I remain baffled. As it stands, mountains will get two to four feet, mountain valleys (here or canyons?) will get eight to sixteen inches, and the (what?) plains valleys will get two to four inches. I will figure it out.

Sleep has been good. I have the house heat set to be 72 F for a few hours starting at 6:00 in the morning, then cool to 66 F for most of the day from 8:30 to 17:00, then have it warm up to 68 for a from 17:00 to 19:30, then have it drop to 62 for overnight. Somewhat syncing with a proposed day schedule of waking and breakfast, midday life, then warming for supper, and finally cooling for sleep. Well, it is a plan. What has helped is finally using the electric heat for the areas I usually inhabit. I have been experimenting with those. I may end up turning the main house heat down further and being more directional with the use of the electric heat. Still learning.

From what I see, and assuming I get a few things done, I can see myself in a much better financial situation in only a few years. Many of the expenses I have had have been one time deals, such as the lawnmower, weed whip, water systems, and such. And though I have more one time purchases to come, such as wood working tools (both power and hand), a grain mill, and some cookery and heating devices for off-grid, I also have some money coming in. I will have to be wise in the use of that money and then my money after that, but it could see me to a bit more stability, something I have never really known or been able to be in a position or put myself in a position to know. This is the first time in my life that I have had to strain, though, too. Before now I could have always merely walked away. I am tied to my land, stapled to it, give or take. Sure, I could walk away, still. But not quite in the same way.

Boy that coffamoca is good.

Oh, I am trying to make some plans for meals, and a special meal, when my lady friend arrives. She has become an absolutist about sugar, her newest kick. I keep telling her absolutes are incorrect and she continues to look for new ones. Well, so be it. She allows honey and some of the plant derived sweeteners though, so we will work on that. I have been meaning to stock up on honey for sure, and some of the others, and try them in cooking. I have tried all of them she is aware of and some she has not heard of yet, and they are all pretty bad. The best so far, for more raw usage anyway, is Splenda. I am torn between a turkey, a turducken, or a Beef Wellington. The turkey I know (though it will be different out here), the turducken would be new and is a little spooky, the Beef Wellington is very spooky as it is not just the main dish which would be new, making the duxelles and puff pastry would be first times (though I could make those in advance, easily, and test my processes). Each would have a different set of requirements, each would require different skill sets and would also demand varied side dishes, and I certainly could not afford to do even two of them (though may a turkey on the side as a rescue main dish?). But beyond these things, I have to consider what we will eat other than the main meal. Something I viewed from the series "Good Eats" caught my attention though, that is a pumpkin stew/soup cooked right in the skin! And, of course, I hope to try a few meals using my pressure cooker, beef stew tops the list, though pork roast would not be bad either. In truth, I probably only need to cook three main meals (at most), along with having grains, rice, beans, and my other handy meats at hand (such as hamburger and tuna). I am curious what she thinks of my tuna fried in butter, with rice, hot and savory spices creation. Fresh tuna steaks cooked as a main entree in a meal, then the left overs used in my creation, would be truly fine dining. The thing is, my nickle is thinning to a thin penny and even it does not go all that far and more and more as our government continues it's war on our excessive wealth! (People really ought to be thinking of who to string up first, for that I would be thankful.)

I best visit my favorites, check on the news rolls, check email, and then get ready for my winter road trip. Does a twenty mile trip count as a road trip? What if you can see snow? What if it is snowing? ArE wE THerE yETI?

Interesting...

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I keep thinking about women. Lord, since you are listening, please help me. No, not in a "bad" way. My thoughts concerning women could be seen in a bad light, but they are natural and even good thoughts. Making a woman honest is not about sex before marriage, and then marriage to make it right. Making a woman honest is marrying her so that she may be right with her thoughts and yearnings (works both ways, but tradition focuses on women for... many reasons). Blathering. Anyway, as I said, women have been on my mind. There is always the chance I might still be able to help produce, feed, raise, and send forth a couple or more new humans. This, of course, requires women though in the singular tends to work better. And, so, like any intention, thought is needed. Thankfully or not, I need no such incentive. As vile as women are or can be, they are unmistakably attractive, utilitarian, and are or can be as good too. In the dishonest way the more attractive in some ways, which is settled by marriage? Gakh! Never mind.

I saw an article suggesting that traumatic events might be erased from memory. This, it is supposed, will fix that dread disease. For my part, I know it will not work. I know because some of my issues are not remembered. What ends up happening is these sensations come to the sufferer, who has no memory, out of context. As well, there is the possibility that, with these sensations, the mind will create memories so as to make sense of the sensations. Either that or I have forgotten less than I think. As well, even if memories may be banished, that is only one part of the effects of trauma. Things which cause serious turmoil, pain responses, and such, are stored not just in memory but in a gland or part of the brain that is still little understood. Reactions come from that even if there is no memory to go with it. The brain was well geared to keep us alive, even if memory fails... short or long term. This would not heal but would create a horrid life of shadow and pain for any who suffered disastrously and then had their memory erased. The only way to begin healing is a lot of talking with someone who can handle hearing about things, real things, most people might not even have heard of or thought possible. A claymore does things to bodies most simply cannot imagine and Hollywood has not really even tried to show, for example. I hope they do not experiment with this on troops. It is very easy, during some stages of suffering, to wish to simply forget. The easy road will not end up being half so easy as the "hard path". Try it on Obama when he fails and is castigated to the fringes of history and society. With a sociopath, I do not think it can actually do any harm. But then send him back to Kenya or wherever will take him. Cuba? NK? Sure, he will not know or care, mostly.

I did not make it to town to buy a siphon for gas yet. I need to get to sleep and try to be in to town and back before the big storm hits. I ought to buy a little more food while I am at it, at least milk. We will see.

Good night.

Work, as I can.

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And some play to boot. I just got the machine back and hooked up. It is always nice to have. I miss reading blogs, staying up on the news, researching this and that, and games of course. And I always fear taking it to the shop. One never knows how much it will end up costing. This visit was not too bad, but it was money out. One of the problems, as I have learned, was that the power cord for the drive was bad. He did not say what else was wrong. Well, one thing tended.

I have been reading about the pressure cooker. After a failed attempt to cook beans in the device, I re-read and read more consciously through the instruction book and cook books to better understand things. Still a bit unsure, I decided on using the pressure cooker in a test. I tested how much water it loses. What I found was surprising. In 20 and 40 minute intervals, it only lost 1/3 of a cup of water. At an hour it lost 2/3 of a cup. It is a rather tight device, as some lose up to 3 cups of liquid in an hour. I learned some other things, including knowing what means what on the pressure cooker. The variance in water loss, I also realized, depends on how fast I bring it up to pressure and then tend that. Oh, and I really can cook on a very low setting when it is up to speed. My range goes from low to 1, then through the numbers to 9 and then a high. About 8 minutes on high will get it pressured and if I then put it on another burner set at 2 the pressure will be maintained.

As well, I have been reading much in "The Joy of Cooking: 75th Anniversary". What a splendid cook book, by the way. If you want a top of the line, just about all inclusive, solid manual regarding cooking, this is it. It covers many types of cooking, from the range to drying and curing to pit cooking. It has 4,500 recipes which seem spot on (from a cook who loves to experiment, me, that is) to the various methods and variations within those methods. The book had something I have been interested in cooking for a long time but never got around to cooking. My foster mother made custard once in a while if I was sick or as a treat for my foster father. I loved it but... was nervous about making it for some reason. I have now, officially, baked my own. It needs improvement, perhaps, but it was sufficient and even tasty.

Laundry has been washed and dried, the kitchen has been being used and kept clean, and little bits and pieces go forward. I need to begin cleaning the whole house in preparation for my visitor early this coming month. I think I can get that done. As well, my days have been, pretty much, brought into daytime alignment. Oh, I had another visitor. The block captain arrived to let me know there will be a weather condition tomorrow, from 17:00 on through the night. He obtained my phone number though, so that a visit will not be required next time.

I still have not visited my neighbors (back) yet. But then I am having trouble getting going on lots of things. I am eating, resting, and such well enough, but there is simply something wrong. Sometimes, no matter mood, temperament, appetite and the feeding of that, and sleep all being in good alignment, I still cannot function well. And, so it is currently. Oh bother, I will get to things. Time. By the way, I can see the neighbor's livestock out back now. Several Shetland ponies and... a Llama! Heh! How many people can say their neighbor brought a llama over into their back yard? *grins* A llama? A llama! Heh.

I did solve the problem with the laptop. I found the password. However, it does not have security yet, nor can I find the power supply cord. When I get to those things, I will then at least have access to the internet and blogging when this dies next time. So many little things to do, so little time, too much of a problem doing things. But they will be done in some time and some order.

Well, bedtime I think. I will try to be up early enough to get into town for a few last minute items. Good night.

Still awake.

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I made it through the morning lull and I think I will be able to make it to the computer shop, stopping by the post office on the way. I would like to go shooting, but the only gun I have clean is the .45 and right now bullets are not on the economic menu. It is only $20 or so a box, but I would want two boxes.

Sassy is going out more often, and sometimes asking to go even when Sam chooses not to go. Sam is going out less, for whatever reason. Milk has them both happier critters, though Sassy became seriously silly. She is on a tear, beating on Sam and me, if losing in the end. I am not sure what is up with her. Growing pains I suppose.

We are supposed to get snow this weekend and into the beginning of next week. I have not checked my snow blower yet! I need to get a siphon to remove the old gas, if there is any in it, before trying to prime and start it. Old gas has a way of causing real problems. Even being left in the machine causes me worry. I simply have not checked that yet. If we get the amount of snow they suggest, I will need the snow blower. This will be, if it happens, the first snow to stick let along pile up so far this season. Oh, and I saw a predicted low of 12 coming up in about a week as well. Of course, to me, 12 F is... heavenly. If I am back to where I have been for years, I do not really suffer cold until it drops to negative 20 F. Every lover I have ever had has been able to withstand letting me open the window in the winter, as I put off enough heat... at least in bed. What they do not like is having to skitter through the cold to the warmer part of the house when waking up. Meh, I always enjoyed watching that part. *evil grins*

Well, I ought to get going. I would like to get another larger kitty litter box, now that Sassy can use it. Before it was simply too high for her to get in safely and sanely. Now it would be nice for the extra sifter and having 4 pans of the same size for switching in and out and cleaning and allowing to dry. The kit comes with two pans, along with the sifter, so having one "pan" already along with another, given that it's a set, accounts for the numbers. In case you were wondering.

Have a great day!

In spite of extra sleep, I am quite tired.

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I suppose it just takes time. This would be my sleep time, or nearing it, if I had not slept extra long last night so I suppose it is to be expected. I did buy, finally, coffee. I may try that and a small breakfast of oatmeal and an egg, along with coffee. My new pot is not in, yet. Well, it might be. On my way to shop I stopped at the post office. I have two slips indicating that I have packages in. It sort of surprised me as usually packages are delivered via UPS or the other. I was wondering about that because when Amazon emailed me, they indicated there was a problem with delivery. They offered a link to USPS, but that link is not functional in handling packages in my zip code, so I just assumed that undeliverable meant just that. I will go in today and see if my cookbooks, pressure cooker set, and such, are in. One can hope, if doubt as well.

The kitchen has been swept, the kitty litter changed, milk has been offered though the mousers did not seem as interested as I had thought they might. Everything I purchased has been put away, beans are soaking. So, I suppose I did do some work. I noted that my bedroom smells like a manroom, beastroom really. So, I suppose, I should get on that. I was wondering if my sense of smell was going because I had not noticed any foul smell lately. The bedroom would not be noticeable as I am either sleeping or barely awake when in there. No, I think my nose is still good... well, as good as man noses go.

Oh, there is a young woman who I see frequently when I shop. She is, to say the least, different. She is... interesting. She is young enough to be a mother, seems single, seems interested, and is interesting. I always talk her up, though tonight I just smiled, nodded, and said a few things... then rushed off. Not to be rude, or seem disinterested, but too, showing too much attention is not a good thing either. None of that was the issue, however. As I said, I am natural at these things. She would make for a controversial wife, should that come about. But, what about me or my life is not controversial? No, not inter-racial or any such thing. Tattoos my friend, and visible and such. There is just something about her, a combination of innocence and not. The tattoos, like money, strength, finesse, and other traits or qualities or considerations, are only an indication of something. Anyway... Yeah. Whatever.

Hey, I think out of the box here and in real life. A woman comes to a man as she is, and he either bites or spits her out. I like this one. Oh, I would be fine with a woman with no tattoos and all normal other things too. Actually I would prefer that for all intents and purposes. All I know is that when a woman attracts me, I then begin considering why that is so and maybe working on it. Yes I do.

Well, later.

Some success, some not.

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While shopping I always check what food storage is available. I have been having a difficult time finding the types of plastics I like. I have some glass, if they are smaller and more for the freezer to my mind. After throwing out the larger junk ones, I have not seen decent sized snap tight lid types in some time. Well, tonight was the night. I found many in many sizes, the largest holds 2.5 gallons, and I bought five or six other smaller sizes. Now I feel ready to tackle batch cooking much more readily.

I did find an internal hard drive, the last on the shelf. A Seagate Barracuda, 1 tb, and pretty much what I had been hoping to find. A 500 mb device would have been fine, but that was not to be. At $130 or so, plus $6 for a warranty (yes, for this, definitely), I cannot go wrong. The problem is, it does not work either. I am thinking my system has a problem. It connects to the motherboard, so I went into bios. Everything is set to automatic, nothing detects another device. I am not sure what else to do in bios. I do not know enough to really try and troubleshoot. I do have the manual for the motherboard and bios somewhere, though I do not think it will help. I honestly think I have everything set to seek or find a new hard drive. So, there I am. I will simply have to take the machine, plus my old hard drive, in and see if I can get this fixed. I would like to have them all working, to be honest. If I buy a newer system, I will salvage the 1 tb for that, along with what else I have planned. Well, at least I got of my duff, got out, found what I needed, and set it up as I am able. Hopefully this afternoon I will have my machine back to gaming specs.

I will also ask about the printer. For whatever reason, it simply is not functioning for me. The printer does show up, from time to time, as connected through the USB, but then it disappears and never works. I simply do not know what the problem is. I cannot find a security issue either. No, not sure where the problem is. It has worked, and well, before. Faxes to printing to copying, this system used to do it all. The only thing it might be, again, is memory issues. When the only hard drive gets down to a certain level, RAM may become problematic (something like that). I know there is a place to check and change that parameter... Hmm, might have to look. *sigh* Well, there is hope.

Oh, I have washed and dried the storage containers. I did not buy them then let them sit around for a month or two before cleaning them and getting them ready for service. As such, I will soak beans to cook sometime today, and cook rice as well. Bit by bit, with a little incentive from the local peeps, I seem to be getting back into the grove. And, yeah, it does feel right... good... and about time.

Well, that is that.

The push is on.

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Okay, so I have been crippled a bit lately. And I have a wonderful talent for understatement. After the visitations, I have been trying to figure out how to kick out of the rut, get on my feet, and then back into the saddle. Really? Yes, really. Looks can be deceiving. When one is flat on their back and in a rut, getting out is not always what it might seem. Sometimes, when you roll right to the edge of the rut and it would seem you should keep pushing in that direction, you would be wrong. You must go back and either rest a bit and try again, try the other side, or try the same side you almost got out, depending on what looks best. Momentum is required. If you lost it all getting that close to the edge of getting out you must either rest, or reverse course hoping to build enough momentum to get out the other side. If you trust me on nothing else, trust me on this. I do know this thing.

The first thing I did today, consciously, toward becoming more functional, was to stay in bed longer, consciously trying to sleep longer. As I have noted, I cannot reverse my schedule. Or to put it another way, I cannot wake up earlier in order to reset my working time schedule. If I am waking up at 10:00, there is no way I can begin waking at 8:00 and then 6:00. I have to oversleep my way to waking at 6:00. Like a clock that has no mechanism to reverse the shown time, one must advance the time to the wanted new shown time. So, I slept an extra five or six hours. Further, when I finally did get out of bed, I took a shower right off the bat. No more musky me, whenever I get up. If I skip a day of showering, I must then at least comb my hair and or wear a cap. It had been... some time since I showered last. My soap did NOT want to get near me. Shampooing took... a bit. Can you say 'old goat'?

I could not get out yesterday. No shopping, no computer shop, nothing. I did eat, and kept up on the dishes. Other than that, nothing. Today, since I am up later, I am hoping to try and get some of those things done. No promises. I cannot offer those. I can only tell you that I am itching to get back up and going. Even one such as I am affected by the social. More so than I am affected by my own plans, ideas, or such. I guess, after all, I am not an island? Yeah, I suppose.

The good thing about tinkering with the computer is that I have realized how easy it was. I was beginning to worry, after so many years, if I had forgotten all I knew and that things would be Greek to me, or at least forms of Greek I am either no longer familiar or forms I never learned. *grins* Learn math, you will collect some Greek. Become familiar with the English Language as Americans speak it, and you will learn more Greek. Trust me on this, though less so than earlier, if you wish. Nope, I was able to clearly see what was going on, what to do, what to try, and how to do it. The tight spots of some of the plug options, the complexities of finding a cords two ends once it has been bundled, and a few other things, of course, remain a pain in the butt. Still, it is better than engines, where a tight spot often can mean busted knuckles. Yes... I... do... remember.

I know a good deal. Not so much about mechanics, though I could learn more on that if I chose to. I still hate to have greasy oily hands and filth under the fingernails that cannot be removed... which is why I could never be a mechanic of any sort. It is... repulsive to some aspect of my nature, if I do respect those who not only can do that but will do it, and more if they like to do it. I am electrical or combat, with a nod to mechanical. Still, if it comes to it, my hands will go in... But it had better mean the difference between life and death.

I boiled a goodly lot of eggs. They are cooling as I speak, and seem to peel quite nicely this time! Yes, a strange thing to be excited about, but stored boiled eggs, along with cooked rice and beans, in the refrigerator, means I can cook less but much better when I do, and still eat a much better set of foods. Variety, along with bulk and fine cooking, will make any efforts I commit to much more possible. This time I used every trick I knew and one my friend recommended, used my "good water", and boiled in a precise military manner, watching everything closely. They needed a bit more cook time after the boil, the middles a little soft, so... The timer is going off, it is time to deal with those. Now, I like, even love, softer centers, perhaps even liquid to a degree, for fresh hot breakfast. But for refrigerator stored peeled eggs, no... Well, to the eggs. By the way, the boiling pot is already cleaned. If I make it to the store, I will use it to cook rice later.

One last update, all the dishes are now clean. I will spend an hour or two looking over my news and blog sources (often more news from blogs, actually), and wake up. Then to the store. Hmm, now would be a great time to put in a load of laundry, while I am at it and getting on top of things.

That is all...

Doh!

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Okay, I really have started getting my home straightened. It does take time, and while doing so, I have not been tending to my own grooming. Yes, squirreled away in what had been an unbreachable abode, I have... been lax. Dishes, trash, kitty litter... Tended and well and usually, with only dishes sometimes falling slack. But these are all up to par now. Grooming and minor tending... is on the list. I have made small inroads here and there, but much remains. Oh, no, I do not live in a pigpen even at my worst. It is simply a little cluttered and unkempt. Just so you know. I may be a bachelor, but I am not a complete sloth.

Three more visitors, ladies all, visited this evening... just after I woke up. Even if I do tend to grooming, well, I will have to work on my schedule. There would not have been time to groom between waking and their visit, and to be honest, right after I wake up I... well, I smell. I am sort of funky, like any wild animal. I definitely smell like a bull male, heavy, harsh, musky. Still, they were rather pleasant. Oh, but this time I at least welcomed them into my home. I really felt bad about not doing so last time. And, from now on, good or bad, visitors will be brought in. Which reminds me, I ought to keep something on tap for visitors. Beer is not quite the going social liquid refreshment, and is not even a regular item for me. But hot cocoa might be. Or at least water. Yes, yes, grumpy as I am that is how I prefer to roll. But I need to get the living room a bit sorted out so that company may enter and be seated as well. Some grump I am turning out to be!

Other problems include that I still have not taken my machine in or gone shopping. Today is, sort of, just starting. A shower and to the store before I get bogged down in work here. I really need some food. I do quite well with the stores I have on hand in spite of being low. That is something else I garnered from my mother. Having been a farm lass and having been a single mother, she learned that two groups of vegetables whether they be from can, fresh, a quick stop at a store, or home canned, a meat, and milk, water, juice, or something (we did not 'do soda' except as rare treats), and a meal for our little family was on. Mixing, matching, and experimenting, a little spice, a little love, and a bit of work makes for fine food. And it beats eating out any day. Anyway, I best get to the store as I would like some of my regular meals and to quit tearing into my short term stock. (Short term stock is loverly to have, by the way!)

My lady friend keeps calling. She wants flight information I have printed and sent, and yet my machine is broken down that way. She does not have email, so I cannot simply forward it. I am going to try one more thing tonight, to try and get that functional. I am wondering if the new security ware is the problem, though I have no real clue how to begin fudging that just enough to allow the printer and yet keep it whole enough to remain secure... if that is indeed the problem. Further, all attempts to get the second hard drive functioning have failed. I could not use the cords currently not attached to the working hard drive as they simply do not fit. As is, the cord that is used in the functional hard drive had to be "modified" to fit (probably using a high tech device, like a Dremel, bah!). Custom computer builders are not what they are cracked up to be. Although it has worked for into 7 or 8 years, that they did not use the correct cord is annoying (as a friend would say, for the charges they priced). I have to give them that 7 or 8 going onto 8 or 9 years though. While shopping, I may see if I can find a hard drive to add in. I am not sure if the old hard drive is dead or if the connections are dead, perhaps the wiring is dead. I simply do not know.

In any case, I cannot get the information to my lady friend, or much else, until I figure out the computer. Gahhhh! Everything happens all at once, it seems.

In any case, I have truly enjoyed the few visits that have occurred. What guy would not enjoy having six women stop by to say hello from time to time? And a couple of gents before that? Oh, and another lady before even that? Never happened in Iowa City. And, as reclusive as I seem, I enjoy company. Most people are so busy that company is a luxury they rarely entertain. My problem is that I have so much time that visiting people would make me a pariah. So, I leave the door open and let them choose the time. Which, also, can be a difficulty. Although, with this many people to bother, I might start visiting on a rotating basis. Exploring who does not mind a visitor from time to time, who has the time and interest, and... well... getting out a bit. Who knows what kind of troubles the locals are into. There might be hunters, or hikers, or shooters, or eaterists ('nother made up word, sue me), or horsemen and women, or... well, you get the gist.

I will... figure these things out... eventually. Oh, these three ladies, the visitors from tonight, wanted to pass on information to the lady of the house. They saw my mother here, or something, and thought to invite her to lady's functions, such as knitting groups and such. And they suggested, that if I needed help with things, that they would be willing to provide assistance through their husbands or other men. I offered them my number and suggested that if they need help, and can call a day or two in advance (or even stop by and check), that because I have no schedule, I would be willing to pitch in. I have forgotten to do that up to this point. Yes, yes... not much, but it is what I have to offer. And, who knows, perhaps they will find work for these idle hands. I might even learn something too. You know, a knock on my door might be all it takes to unlock what I am and can do... again. I once was a wonderful worker, hard, smart, dedicated, interested, and... once, long ago, able.

Well, time to shower and get on the road. I might do the dinner dishes though. Now that people are visiting, I had best keep on top of that. Later.

Still tinkering with the computer.

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I am not sure what went wrong. I do know, in the shop, he had both hard drives working. Now only one is working. I have tried various attachments, none seem to work on the bigger hard drive. So, I am about to try the attachment on the hard drive that is working on the hard drive that is not and go through another battery of trial and error. To be honest, I worry that this may kill the good hard drive, but such is the way of things. If all else fails, I will simply buy two more hard drives. I may be buying one already anyway. Wish me luck.

Oh, and I did get the last of the dishes washed and put away. I would love to make some oatmeal now, but since I did not make it into town, I have no milk. And, yes, I can be predictable about some things. Milk with oatmeal is a non-negotiable. On another matter, Sassy finally worked up the nerve to go out, slightly after Sam, on her own and without any intervention on my part. No milk plus a little more size makes her just a little more curious? Ah, but it is a good thing. She was the first to let me know she wanted in. Sam came home about a half an hour later. I do think, now, that Sassy has learned not to follow Sam. Smart kitty, if I read Sam as well as I think. *evil grins* (Hate those older/younger siblings sometimes, no?)

Well, back to spoding my machine. Later... Maybe much later. By the way... since I am still up, I may just try and make a day of it. It is a brutal thing, and often does not really help me reschedule, but... with the added pressure of wanting to be social... it might. Later, again...

Much done much to go.

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My plans hit a little snag... reality. The dishes, actually, took much more time to do than what I had anticipated. Part of the problem is that I have been cooking with and eating more cheese than usual. Well, cheese it seems, is not a pleasant or easy item to clean out off pots, bowls, plates, silverware, or... anything. And it gets everywhere. No worries, I enjoyed the cheese and I did get everything clean, finally. Well, cheese and that I had about 8 pots on top of everything else. No, not the little pots. The smallest pot I have is 8 quart. It is cute next to the big ones. I did set those to soak last not, putting down newspaper on my table for them to set upon while I soaked all the dishes I could fit in the sink. Of course, now I have more dishes to do as, after a good bit of work, I became very hungry. Those are now soaking and will be done, I think, before I go to bed.

Tomorrow will be the day for shopping, the computer shop if I cannot figure the problem out on my own yet tonight and I am just about to start on that, and shooting if the weather is good. Wait, scratch shooting. I still have not cleaned my guns. They all need more than a spit and shine, other than my .45 which is pristine at the moment. If I have energy after getting home, I will try to get to laundry. I have a ton of that to go through.

The visitors are what I needed. Actually, not just them but this last group was the main catalyst. People have been visiting and I have been meaning to visit the man who harvests the alfalfa. I sort of have a plan to visit some of these people, and to have my home in such order (regularly) to invite people in when they happen to knock. I really should not be embarrassed to let people in, but I currently am embarrassed. Who knows, maybe someone will simply visit, or stop by to see if I could lend a hand for a moment or longer, or such. None of that will become as natural and frequent if I am not able to welcome people in. Some people might be comfortable otherwise, and if it were ongoing construction in the middle of an already busy life that would be another thing too, but this is not that and I am not those people. For good or ill, this is a thing passed from mother to son, strongly. I think it is for the good. Just like my unwillingness to leave the house unbathed, even after only a single day.

So, it seems all I needed was a little push. Interaction with people is a wondrous thing. Especially people who are clearly share interests and are neighborly. In spite of my obvious state of being, they have all even been pleasant. This is... new to me. Even some of the people in Iowa City who where pleasant where merely looking for... something, anything. These people really are not. The back lot? But they were willing to pay for it. Imagine, offering to pay for something that really is no loss to me to offer. Yes, I live in a different place and I want to catch the wind. Which means a bit tidier abode. Plus, I want to start visiting some of these people with offers of food, a hand, or merely a bit of talk. Which reminds me... I need to start going to the post office when it is open. Hmmm, that might be incentive to begin my walks out to the lake. The weather is cool enough to be good and will soon be cold! Well, walking there in the winter might be a bit tricky. The road does close in quite a bit and is narrow as is. Snowshoes? Cross country skis? Hmmm...

Well... whatever. I am getting a fresh start. I may complain about women. And rightly darn it! But uhrm, that does not always mean all that much. Dogs bark. Still, they do something for men, even men who are not their own. Annoying. But I like how that whole thing works anyway. Well, a few searches on the internet, a looking over of the machine to see if I can get it to work, a few more dishes to finish off with a clean kitchen tomorrow, and then to bed I think. Good night, probably.

Visitors!

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I am still in my pajamas and have not fully awaken yet, let alone showered, but I received a knock on my door, then the doorbell. So, I ran and got my baseball hat, for some modicum of presentability, and answered the door. For some reason, here, I will answer the door even if I am in poor shape. I guess it is because I have real neighbors here. Neighbors I do not have to fear or kill. Three women were there and... had a question. Am I using my back lot, do I have any livestock? Well, no, not yet, not this year. Could they use it? Well, urhm, I am sort of leasing it to Paul for the alfalfa. This would not be problem, it is simply for a short period as their field is a bit wet and congested, so deteriorating, the main speaker says. Well, then, certainly! She offered rent, and I suggested for $3,000 a month, I would be all good... then chuckled. No rent, I insist. Not for neighbors.

The conversation could have ended there, but several topics came up. Goats, of which they have several (many?), and rabbits, and chickens. These folks, all of them, are... well... animal lovers! (Of the homesteading varietal.) So, we discussed these various things. Goats only need milked once a day (that is new to me). Rabbits are not quite the work that they might seem either, so I was told. And, reading about these things might be more of an issue than actually just doing, I am told. So... I now have a source of information and livestock, have met some of my neighbors, and will have some livestock in my back yard if temporarily. Neat. Oh, and they will be checking the fence to make sure it is good for their needs and improving if necessary! I suggested, if they need or want help, to try and contact me. I also suggested that it might be difficult, as my sleeping patterns are haywire, a thing I have been struggling with for into the third decade now, but I suggested I am worth the attempt if it is successful. (Yes, I do like to work, especially to learn or if someone else knows what they are doing and just needs a hand, though those sort of go hand in hand a bit.)

Good things do happen to bad people! Well, not bad, broken? Yeah. Then again, as I suggested to them, I chose this place, this city, and this state for a real reason. It is filled with real people. People living the way I am hoping to figure out how to live. People learning that wealth is in self-sufficiency, and that good things come to those who toil. I do probably need to get over my incessant notion that work needs to be Spartan in nature. Even the Spartans knew that, while I seemingly have missed a nuance or dozen in those ways. I did not tell them but believe the horrid make-belief riches of the city are banal, evil, ugly, polluted, harsh, and even often (usually) fatal in both fleshly and spiritual ways. I could not have been more correct in my assessments about this town, as I come to see more and more. Now to get off my bum and make use of the resources and offer my work to make it all work for myself and others. Yes, freedom is free, but you have to choose it. It is work, time, and effort, but you will be employing these no matter the case, even one such as me.

Just... an update. Now for dishes, a shower, and shopping. Later.