I fiddled…

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while there was work to do.
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I took yesterday off, after the test and my second class. I arrived home just in time for the furnace repair man and my landlord to arrive. This is a duplex and they decided to check both furnaces while they were here, starting with the other apartment. My landlord was as surprised I was home as I was that they were still here, or more just arriving at my place technically. With the furnace working it was difficult for the technician to diagnose a problem. He did give me some idea of what to listen for and showed me where some problem leds where, which I could also check in such a situation. He did some maintenance, cleaning a particular part and checking several others. Still, nothing seemed out of the ordinary making it more of a general check-up.

Then my landlord began working on a kitchen drawer which had become dysfunctional. I had purchased the piece to repair it but I had not gotten around to it. It seemed that it would be really tight work for my big hands and arms as well as my general inability to do more than just barely keep up with what I need to do for school, home, business, and such. He had thought it would be a quick job. I knew better. He was here for a good 3 to 4 hours tinkering with that. He did get it done and did a good job. I offered technical help, occasionally. Sometimes it may have been helpful, sometimes he already knew, but I was not mistaken and did not lead him astray, but mostly I just let him tinker unless he asked for help of some sort or other. Generally, he did not ask for technical help. I only offered it when he kept doing the wrong thing, the wrong way, or made a mistake he had not considered (adding washers to a screw to make it go through the drawer less also added to the length of the screw head which would disable the ability of the device to roll along the track, for example). He still tried it and it still failed, I was just saying. And, I did have some tools which helped the process, my smaller bolt cutters, Dremel, and a few parts (like the washers he insisted on trying, and again after I had suggested he take them off and he did, only to put them back on when I had drifted away… men :P and yeah, I am like that too when I am the worker and not the technical adviser). Anyway, he got the thing done, we had a decent afternoon of occasional chat, and then he headed out.

So, being that it was late, I was exhausted from the test and from the company (having people in my home makes me tired somehow), and just because I felt like it, I took the rest of the day off. Well, I take that back. I needed to do homework for probabilities and statistics. One component of that called for the use of software at the University. I had gotten that to work once through my home computer connected through the internet, then I could not get it to work the next time I tried, so I was not sure I could do it from home. And I was nervous about the work, both technically and then the actual problem(s). So, between tinkering and plunking around the thing, I got to a point where I could explore. It all went so smoothly, once I figured a few things out, and the work was easy, so I just did it. That is the kind of work I like to do. But, I was very nervous about the rest of the homework! It really is somewhat complex, if I have an idea about what we are doing, and a good one, actually doing the work seemed too daunting. I planned on waking up this morning and getting right on it! Urhm, yeah, about that…

After tinkering, messing around, looking at the stupidifier (television, on), eating, then back to tinkering and messing around, it was about time for my nurse to visit (she is back). My weight is down, my blood pressure is pretty darn good (136/85 or so), my blood sugar was up (to 150), and my temp was up (to 97.6, a degree and change high for me). And, of course, we talked. I do not know if she really likes talking or if this is information they somehow use for research or to keep general tabs. I can just see it, “Client # likes beer, rich food, and talking.”, “Client # thinks the V.A. is out to ruin his college career, believes they have given him a placebo, and asked me if I might be involved.”, etc. I really am not worried, I say what I think and pretty much think what I say. I have trimmed what I think, for the very large part, to what can be said. You get here what anyone else gets, for the most part. Anyway, that took me to lunch. And, anyone knows, you cannot work right after eating a meal!

At 20:00, I finally decided to begin trying to do something. But there was one formula on one page (and only given on one page of notes) which I could not find! I sorted, shuffled, searched, and stacked. I went through my file, my back pack, and other papers which might have been near where I had been working. Nothing and I was just about nauseous about it. I looked in the book, but how the book presented it, if that was even the correct formula, was a little too Greek. I thought it might have gotten into my physics notes, so I did the same there. No luck, so I straightened and organized that and put it away again. I went back through everything from probability and statistics, and found it after the second go around. I am not sure when, or if it was set aside the whole time, but I finally found it off to the side. I did the first two problems, and was initially stymied. I just could not get it to work. Back to the notes, and I reread a number of things. Ah, I was using the standard deviation from the problem before and the intended significance level for the other problem I needed to do. I whipped it out, rightly, in no time, once I used the correct data. I just assume I was still a bit wired from searching for that one page (which I still have not needed, and may end up not needing at all, as they have been giving us that information rather than having us work it, so far, arghhhhh!).

I still have a good deal of work to do. I am probably ¼ of the way through, though more like 1/3 the way through if you consider the computer lab component into the equation. And, I feel quite confident I will get it done and right, mostly. But I had to just break down and shove to even get started. Then with the frustration of losing that page, I was not sure. I have been doing poorly on homework, if I even attend on Fridays to hand it in for fear of the quizzes. I have 3 or 4 homeworks not handed in, and with that of course, 3 or 4 quizzes which will be 0’s. Those were from when I was falling. I may ask him if there is something I could do to ensure I do not fail. I cannot ask for exceptional offers, but if doing some projects would keep me from failing if that is the case, then I would do so. Since and before my illness, I made it a rule to be there, with what I have (and to have it done as well as possible). And, I am doing it. This time though, it was just very hard to get started, harder than usual. More work remains, I should stop fiddling.

Oh, no physics tomorrow, so if I need to speak to him about a problem, I will have an hour after office hours to finish. Assuming I can awaken in time for office hours after staying up to do the homework. But the house is warm, I am back on track with this material, I finished my physics test (and studying for that) as well as I honestly could, and I am set to have next week off for Thanksgiving (they give us the whole week now!). I would like to go over some of this material, prep for physics a bit, and enjoy a good meal or two. I will be visiting my Mother and other family and friends in that area. She already has me lined up to do some work, but that is fine. It pleases her so much and it gets her little nest a bit more to her particular liking. It is nice to be the good son, once in a while, now.

I am off and at it again!