Rants!

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Rant 1. What is with all of these sex pill adds? Lord knows what I would pay for just the opposite. Without a wife the urge is unnecessary yet commanding. Bigger size? Who needs that? Actually, should I find a wife, a little smaller, at least for a while, might be nice. I have been on medications which are supposed to suppress this, of one type or another, for most of my adult life. It has never helped. Back when I was quite debauched, a rascal one might say kindly, I never found a woman or three who could take up the slack. Hmm, even if I found a wife actual functioning saltpeter might still be the ticket. The only thing that ever killed the appetite was being on a submarine with 168 other guys. But once I got to shore leave and saw women again, all it returned. Raging bull, red flags, yeah, it happened (on more than one occasion). But the incessant ads are more than annoying, they are revolting. I cannot imagine that there could be this much of a market for something that would end up in my death. Gearing up my libido would be like adding meth as a requirement for race car driving or something. Bah!

Rant 2. What happened to the science, wildlife, history, and other such channels? Between avoiding UFO, UWO, Yeti, and terribly incorrect if politically correct broadcasting, I am left with maybe 3 shows a day I would watch from those, most of which I have seen and nearly fully debunked even then. Even the commercials have become politically correct trash. The police shows are completely politically correct. T.V. has become one of the worst “bargains” out there. It is usually $40 dollars for cable, but because (I think) they were having negative growth here, they cut the cost to $15 dollars (at least initially, if that ends I will not re-subscribe). It is barely worth the $15 dollars even with 50 channels or more. Bah!

Rant 3. Diamonds, who would ever buy one of these except as an exceptional cash dump? A big one on a girls finger? Every woman I have known, other than that big rock she is not involved with paying for to get the show rolling (unless she is savvy and forward thinking, then she would reconsider even that, dated a few of those too), would rather have a large capacity front loading washer and dryer set, with the trimmings, a new (second) vehicle just for her own self, a trip to Hawaii, or something like that. Though it is somewhat of a liquid asset, unless you buy them illegally at a cut (-throat, blood based) rate, you lose your shirt just walking in the door. Bah! (add humbug to that)

Rant 4. Stupidity, ignorance, and arrogance. Who came up with these? Now, I like cheerleading blindly for some noteworthy but wrongheaded idea just as much as the next guy, but sheesh, is there no end? Oh, and you had best not slink away now and leave me alone in this circle. Do not even think you know half so well the truth about half of what you believe, why you believe it, or what realistic criteria you base your beliefs. We all live in this circle. No matter how great our knowledge, experience, or certainty, we all fail. To some degree, the more we know the more we are at fault and the greater damage we can do. And grouping with others only amplifies that sensibility. I like the old saying, “We either hang together or we hang alone.” (among other versions, admittedly). But the truth is, we should all be hung, together or alone would do. Well, if fairness and justice were rightly applied and if for no other reason than that we are terrible imperfect. (See, look at how wrong I can be!) Bah!

Oh, heck. It is all good, so long as I take the time to back-peddle once in a while, admit I am wrong, work ahead a few more steps or miles, and do it all again. I have another chance tomorrow to do what I should do, to concede my failings, to work on my strengths and weaknesses, and to pick up and keep going or change direction a bit. I do have a compass that helps, but keeping one’s eye on the compass would mean losing track of some of life. I have become better at guessing the right way when no time can be afforded a review, but that is weak. Even looking directly at the compass, sometimes, can leave me guessing. I suppose this goes with Rant 4.

It looks like the deal will go forward on the new Xterra. It does cost a bit more each month, and though I do not like the deal completely (I never do), I have reasons to let it do so. The dealer did not make a mistake so I will let it stand. It is not that bad of a deal, seen in the plain light and with certain information corroborated. And, it is always nice to hop into a new vehicle. It does have a few neat new adds, as well. I have tried to call my professor, to see him before I go, but as yet, I have not caught him in the office, only receiving his answering service. I would like to talk to him, more generally, about the class as well. And, I would like to see if he could show me how to use my calculator more efficiently. Though he seems to accept some fudging, I would like to figure out how to do some of the more odd (and archaic) math methods regarding some of the math (such as finding the difference between various table data, I know how to do this generally, but I am not sure a z or t(n-1) table follows that exact model both vertically and horizontally along those tables). Ok, fine, I am a bit of a math nerd, or perfectionist, or something. But… but that is not the point!

I am quite nervous about my doctor visit today. There is a great deal riding on the outcome. If he answers well and I trust that answer then I will begin figuring out how to remain in school. If I do so, and if it works, I should be able to begin working out again as well. I would start that at the end of classes to give myself a bit of a jump-start to spring classes and to get back into some kind of shape. All the medicine in the world will not make a difference if I cannot change my physical condition. And, a major change in my physical condition could actually end up changing everything else, perhaps even eliminating the need for medication. I saw it, was so close to it, I know it can happen.

My last loads of laundry are finishing, I have taken care of one of my major tasks (while attempting to care for the other with the calls). I have one minor task, one major task, the completion of my laundry, and I will be ready to go. I suspect packing will be short and sweet, I have a method now. I am off to Mum’s for Thanksgiving. I hope you can find yourself to a home, a meal, or just find some reasons to be grateful. If anyone wants to leave a tip, and since I do not have a tip jar, feel free to help me figure out one of my rants. The last one is best, but any of them would be fine. Happy Thanksgiving!