The day is done.

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I have done what I could. I did go look at some of the storage units, but none were climate controlled as my search had specified. I did a bit more digging. The climate control places are not open currently and are simply not accessible at this time. I will need to wake early and make some calls. I was not able to make contact with the man with whom my previous neighbor was trying to put me in contact. I did find a place to get a decent sandwich. Though they were closing, they allowed me to eat right there, and stay a little later. I was quite grateful. I am pretty sure I smelled 'bud'. I neither do the stuff nor tolerate it in my domain at all, but I know it when I smell it. Since they were gracious, I will stay mum. I also was able to find a place to wash my SUV. It really needed it, the windows were difficult to see through. Dust, rain, and stuff from the road really did a number on the poor creature. I also found my apartment. It is not the prettiest thing, but it will most likely do very well. It looks like a two story college student type of place. Not bad, perhaps there will be more going on and a little more access to activities. The young have a way of quickening us fossils. Perhaps with my Xterra and money to a degree, and their enthusiasm, I can become younger and they can become wiser? It could happen. :p

Driving the Xterra instead of the nasty moving truck and trailer has been fantastic. I still catch myself trying to add in room for turns, slowing down well in advance, and in most other fashions driving as if I was still in the monster. I will be driving the big truck one more time, to unload it. Then I will be free of it for some time. Next time, I will put in a reservation so far in advance, and check on it, to ensure I will not get stuck with such a large truck! Then again, without the trailer, it might be fine as is. The Xterra is still very packed, however, so I probably still need to take some care. The rear view mirror is obstructed as well, which puts me right back into the hauler truck by similarity.

While driving around the last few days, I have been having a strange feeling. I could not quite put my finger on it until tonight. I feel as if I have lived here before. There is a familiarity with the place that is uncanny. I feel like I am home, for good or ill, but mostly for the good I think. The people I have seen, the stores I have driven by, the facilities available and that I have used all bear the mark of having been from my past. Sometimes I wonder if I was simply in a terrible accident and forgot who I was. Everyone else knows, and knows me, but have been told not to tell me or I might not be able to handle it. Perhaps I was a monster, perhaps merely another, who knows. I know it is silly, but there it is. And, as I joined the Catholic Church, then moved here, I feel that I am triangulating on something. Whether that something is my future or my past, or both, I cannot tell. Being as tired as I am, my mind just tumbles through possibilities, thoughts, feelings, and such as if dreaming on my feet. I know this. But I cannot shake the feeling that this new place is indeed not new at all. Perhaps, simply, I belong here. That is a powerful thing all on it's own.

I did have an unusual experience tonight. I was getting money out of an atm. A black man drove up, it was night, I had just entered, and I got a little twitchy. Size and skill are only half of it, dealing with bad situations, win, lose, or draw, has a hefty price. He stayed in his car until I got my money then went to my vehicle. I had forgotten my receipt! And, yes, I was thinking what to do. He came out, with the receipt, and approached me in my vehicle. He looked for acknowledgment about whether to approach and I gave it. He offered me my receipt and I thanked him. Yes, it does make me think. If this is how it is here all will be good. All that I ask is decency. I may have to retrain myself. I will not need to separate good from bad if all try to be good. I may have my beliefs, theories, and such, but I am never displeased to be proven wrong or partially wrong. And I will give any man, who does right as best he is able, anything I have, including parts of my heart, mind, and soul as a brother. Though too, I will slay a thief, murder, rapist, or such without a second thought. I will have to see further evidence, but this is looking more like the place I should be at every turn. I have prayed to God for wisdom, love, and kindness. Perhaps He has lead me to where I may offer that without fear. Time will tell.