Saturday, July 24, 2010

As done as it gets.

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The spare bedroom has been emptied. I am leaving two things in there though, cheapo plastic dressers. Either my mother or I will or may need or want those. For now, that is what I have. I purchased them as portable dressers, not wanting to pull my good one out or tow it around. The living room has been cleared, if it could still use a little more. And it is arranged for when I get a television. This computer room has had a good half of the items removed, but where I am storing this type of stuff is full. And I just do not have it in me to rearrange that to stack more in. So, it is a done deal, if not perfect.

Neck is letting me know I pushed. It is not that the work was great, but today is an off day. Not just because I did a bit more yesterday, but because it is for reasons all by itself. Still, I pushed past that and got to some things. Late, sure, but just as well as I would have if I had been on an good day. What, precisely, will it cost in the near future, I cannot say. Hopefully I have gotten past that enough that I can sneak an extra work day in. Time will tell.

On a very positive upside, the living room will be much more enjoyable from now on. As well, with the kitchen table set up and the proper chairs around it, the bed set up, and the kitchen together enough to use roughly, I am almost home. I really want to get more done, before my mother arrives. I do not want her working physically. I want her to merely work on trim, neatness, lady things. And, I want to enjoy time with her. Just time spent remembering, playing, and talking. It is better to have had and lost than to have never lost. The more terrible the loss the greater the life. One of us may not have a lot of time left. Especially if one of us does not get on the ball.

I am doing well. I am over my head and... learning to swim? Learning to breath water more like! Ah, perhaps a bit of both. I still have far more to do just moving in than what I had hoped and yet I could not have done what I have done a year ago, certainly not with one hand. I feel the pull to go back to sleep and just duck it all, but I feel a stronger need to arrange for my survival in a rough future. It is a real pull, if too I am using it as a crutch to keep on some track. For me, starting with the basics is good, vital, not optional. Perhaps I will figure things out from there. Sam, by having needs only I can fill, has been a part of that. Rabbits are next, though perhaps not as quickly as I had hoped?

Yes, a good off day. Some prospects for a good tomorrow. And perhaps my mother can come into a little tidier mess:) As well, perhaps she can find some peace in her 'trouble' child's new ways and means. To lift some of that worry from her aging shoulders would be a blessing for me. One more piece of history tended and well, an often dark and tumultuous one. This could be good.

Good night, Mom. See ya soon.

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