At least sleep was good.

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The last few nights I haven't been able to get to bed until very late.  Further, sleep has not been good.  It may have something to do with getting used to the new chair.  The position is different, and with a solid back, I can actually "relax" into the chair, but in a more upright solid position.  Well, that and soft of coming down off medicine.  It takes a while for that to work it's way out.  Tomorrow I hope to make an appointment to get things going again.  I really think I should, and I really would like to see if my heart has improved at all or if this has been a wasted effort.  I have decided that the medicines do help, marginally.  They hurt too, if not as much as they help.  Everything, with my health, is extremely marginal.  At least so far.

It is cloudy, or overcast really.  There aren't clouds so much as a smudged sky.  This summer, it turns out, has been brutal.  Higher temps, no rain very few overcast days.  I guess that is why I was having such trouble this year with heat, compared to the last few years.  It IS a bad year.  Good to know.  The stored water is at 71%, so those who use that for fields are okay.  Those who depend on other sources of water are in serious trouble, with the season already over for many of them who would usually harvest several lots right on through to September, down to 10% of yields.  Which means cattle are being, or going to be, put down by the herd.  That will lower prices this year and raise them for at least the next several years.  This adds to other things that have been going on with cattle.  Meat is about to become extremely expensive.  Add to that, grain is being impacted and grazing land has been destroyed, and you see where that is going.  Life is about to get tough, adding unemployment and underemployment only adds grimace to grim.  I won't even go into the economic realities beyond all these.  Enough already and little to do about it.  Buckle your belts, say a prayer, and learn what family is about.  Because money and food have just... hit reality?  Something.

Who knows what tomorrow will bring.  But that has always been our lot.  We lived in a seemingly impossibly fertile time.  We saw marvels, from men landing on the moon to the mapping of (one of trillions) of genetic codings possible for men.  We saw a seeming unending economic monolith created, not realizing it was pie in the sky albeit, born on the back of the most evil genocide, one against children.  And we all drank heartily from that bloody pool, one way or another, knowingly or not.  Payment is past due and the devil doesn't wait.  The good thing?  What the devil takes in payment is what we need to lose in order to regain our composure.  Odd how that works, but it does.  Suffering, humility, pain even?  These aren't to be sought, but they aren't to be shunned, either.  See where they come from.  Pain means you are alive.  Life is the only real magic of this world, and human life is the most magical of all.  Humility allows us to know there is something contrary to that, and seek it.  And yet, I think in the end, we find that humility is also a virtue on it's own if we search deeply enough.  But there is a positive counter to it.  We find both of those, when we seek, the same place we find the source of wisdom, in God.  So, all these things have their place and purpose.  And offer the hope of renewal.  All good, really, let the devil have his dues.  And good riddance.

I ought to get back to goofing.  Have a good day.