I only got partial plates.

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Last night and upon waking are tough.  Dreams, all night long.  The ghosts of women past haunted my steps.  I'm almost thinking it was all of them.  Some chose another way, others chose not my way, and some I chose against, and some... a few... no one had a choice.  Many opportunities, if I still suggest none of them were right.  None where choice remained anyway.  That doesn't mean that they won't kick me in the head.  And they did.  Well, okay, the dreams weren't so much about them badgering me as reminding me that I do miss feminine company.  Sort of, mostly.  Even the most submissive woman is rather demanding, comes with her own set of rules and demands and care and feeding instructions, at least some of which need to be abided, mostly, truth be told. 

A few, who found out that my heart was bad, in real life, as the reason for my... laziness... had a very guilty reaction.  Some just didn't care.  And I don't think, until you are dead, that they truly would change.  And even then they will be angry at you, on top of deserting them you aren't doing anything.  :)  I swear it is true.  Two of my mothers are widows, I get the scoop.  Even when I put out moderate work and decent money, it was never enough.  I learned quickly to hit the "ignore" button and do at my pace, and figured out how.  Oh, no problems, I know it is in their nature.  I also learned how to use that push to my advantage, when I could.  Think of it as an always running motor.  Just because it is always running, doesn't mean you always have to engage the transmission.  Some men never understand, and become hen-pecked.  Yes, I do miss having a woman around.  Mostly. 

I also slept badly, wrong, off.  I couldn't stay asleep, I couldn't get comfortable, like a fish on land all night.  I am a bit sore this morning for no other reason than having slept wrong.  It is a mild thing, and if history tracks with the level of pain on waking, it will burn off like fog before a few hours have passed.  Nothing terrible, just a minor price for a rough sleep.  Everyone has these.  Most, in their hurry to get on with their day, will be over this sort of thing an half hour into shoving their day into gear.  Nothing fancy, this one.  The combination of dreams and hard sleep, probably unrelated, is what makes this one a little unusual.  Aye, but I won't let this get me down.  I did get enough rest in there, and I know what I know about the women and our parting ways, at least the ones where their were choices available, and the pains will be gone shortly.

Hmm... on the home front... The valves need to be taken back and replaced, but probably not today.  Not much today.  Perhaps some of those little chores, and some cleaning.  I don't have much going.  A day of rest, most likely.  But if I see a path to more, you know damn well I will take it.  I hate sitting.  And though I do end up stopping some days, sometimes at a full halt even, I have also been working rather well, all else considered.  Usually a little every day, sometimes more, sometimes much more.  I am no longer in full down exhaustion.  I just, now, have too many things to do and only so much functional time in which to do it.  A bit overwhelmed, and with problems that don't seem to have solutions no matter how deeply I dig.  That faucet, and those valves, are proving to be horrors.  There is no seeming logical reason why they shouldn't be working.  None.  No blockages, no failure to open and close, no grit in there, nothing.  Frustrating.  Should have been a few days of work, and only failed when I installed the r.o.  Doesn't make sense.  Every job I tend seems to end up like this lately.

Oh well.  I'll keep going until I find the solution, I suppose.  More research today, it is something I can do.  If I find a possible solution, that might... get me going on it.  Actually, I might wait until I have several possible solutions, or one that seems highly probable.  Dunno.  Might not be able to get to it anyway.  If not, I will store it, or them, away, like a squirrel stores it's food.  At least memory works these days, too, and fairly well.  Midterm memory still needs... a spark.  Long term memory, of some times, is more like a Salvador Dalí painting in which I have to try to interpret.  But I do have my childhood as good or better than others, and much of my later adult life is in pretty good tact.  When my heart was going bad, memory got just as shredded as the heart.  Short term memory, I think, is what went wrong, which then affected all other forms of memory.  Toss in the pains of dying, and confusion that causes, and it became a real mess.  Short term, I can honestly say, is back to almost normal, maybe better.  Haiku, soduku, medicine, regular feedings, and my effort to push through with enough things in play to do so.  All of it had to be in play, I think.

Oh, okay.  Maybe those pains aren't just from sleeping wrong.  I was tinkering under that sink for a long time yesterday.  Down, in, under, around.  Just those ugly angles, and upside down on the back, and this and that.  But, still, minor.  I just let Sam out, and, yeah, some of it is skelo-musculur.  As I said, minor, and a combination with the sleep issues.  And that is the type of pain I work to earn.  Maybe not every single day, but it's a good thing, to my mind, to have some of that every week, perhaps every other day, more like four or five days a week if I have the energy to earn it.  It means I am doing something new, or a bit more.  And I like doing something new and/or more.

Well... on to waking.  Good day.