Difficulties.

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Stress.  Down.  Had hoped to visit mother today.  Maybe to bring her home, if hoping she would stay a bit longer.  I won't be able to make it today.  Hoping to get a shower in a bit.  Well, after a nap, or longer sleep.

I woke for a few hours, to now.  But have just been crawling.  My uncertainty regarding mother, her condition, what all to do, and just my continued lethargy, have me pinned.  Blood sugar was 90.  Haven't checked bp.  I have been so off my game that medicine has been forgotten.  If food too.

I will try to get a shower tonight.  If tomorrow as well.  I have a few sets of clothes, house slippers, and such, packed for her.  I spoke with one of her charge nurses (the?).  They are deciding what to do.  Asked for my input.

No, a nursing home won't work.  I don't think mom would agree to that, either.  And I will support her on that.  The other, possible, option... if they can get approval, if they have a bed, etc, is for her to stay there a while longer, at the hospital.  But go through a more intensive physical rehab program.

For my part, that is what I chose if available.  I do need to visit a few times a week.  In any situation.  Though, if that is not available, I may have to bring her home and attend her.  I can't do that permanently.  But I can and will while she heals.  If she chooses as I suspect, at least ovef a nursing home should that be the only choice available.

I still can't believe she was so banged up from a fall, while I didn't even get a scratch after being launched at 30 mph off a motorcycle, hitting face first, shattering my glasses at the temple too, onto asphalt as well.  I... sometimes think it (and things like it) are luck.  But... there is no such level of luck.  Though, what it is?  Not for me to say, or even know.

Fragile.  I have limits.  But... not like you all.  I wish I could lend her some of my... resistance to damage.

Folk have heard of our folly, and offered to pray.  And pass on the prayer request.  I'll let mother know.  I can't do much more myself.  Consigned to prayer?  Blessed with the wisdom to know to do do, and request this, more like.  Any who reads here, if any really do?  Pray for her if you would?

I am crashing.  Fed and watered critters.  Remembered to water plants last night, as mother was about to do that at the time of the fall.  Have I lost a day in there?  Maybe.  

I'll fast, mostly, for a while.  Sleep as I must.  Shower and else several times soon.  And... do what I may around the house to catch and keep up.  Ugh.  Good night, I think.