A few more days before I rest.

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We did get to town.  A freezer was picked and placed on delivery notice.  She was looking at a 7 cf, but I wanted the 14.7 cubic foot.  The price difference wasn't right, either.  I don't like paying 2/3rds or more for 1/2 the size.  Another string of Christmas lights was also purchased.  Then to Church, but it looked like that Church was closed for Thanksgiving, being a college Church and this being a week vacation.  So...  Well, we tried.

Tomorrow will see us in SLC, leaving quite early.  I should be in bed, but you all know that I sleep when I do.  Sometimes I can't, as was the case tonight.  I think I will get a few hours in, anyway.  A bit of shopping, and maybe an attempt to get the sewing machine in for tweaks and the bobbin winder looked at.  If we are suspecting, at this point, that the bobbin winder isn't the problem.  Most likely, from her side of thinking and mine, the problem is the bobbin isn't quite the right size.  We will see.

Tuesday I will be helping to do some butchering.  I am not sure what all that entails, curious to find out though.  At least, after being able to haul in two recliners mostly under my own steam, I have some strength left to me.  I also have some very sharp knives, a cleaver, and a steel to take with.  I will be buying butcher paper, as well, on our way through somewhere tomorrow, as well as butcher cord and extra plastic wrap.  Oh, and I will be stopping for artisan salami, cheese, and truffles for my host and his wife and family.  I meant to do that long ago, just... haven't been out much... at all.

Hmm, lots of things have happened, a bit of money has been spent, but... you should see my home!  Cozy and warm, clean and kempt, reminds me somehow of an anthropomorphized rabbit warren.  It is all coming together.  And I think I can keep it running well... for a while... on my own.  Never for too long, but so it goes.

I best get to bed.  Good night.

Slower and slower, still moving though.

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It ended up that I did get out yesterday.  My mother talked me into it, rather easily as it turned out.  We hit three stores, a few groceries I think on my own (preferred, I move), looking at potential wall paper (some of it isn't too bad, actually), and a few other things.  But all of it had to be short, easy, sweet.  Then we grabbed food from a drivethrough and headed for home.  I think she is as tired as I am.  She has been pushing herself pretty hard too.  We will be going to town again today, Church, looking for a freezer, and visiting my friend.  Visiting him stays on the list, but we keep running out of steam. 

A freezer?  Well, yes.  As it turns out, I am going to be getting some beef!  And I spoke with the man about pork.  It looks like I might be ending up with some meats a little sooner than anticipated.  I have little freezer space, as is.  And it has been on the list.  Some for freezing, but perhaps too some for canning.  I will be helping him butcher it as well.  All things on my list.  And, yes, I have enough to roll with a little overage for my monthly finances.  I will have to see when his next pork production is up for grabs, after the year end, and place an order too.  So, a freezer.  I have an account at Home Depot.  If I can find a freezer I like there, my hope is to put half of the freezer on account, half on cash.  As such, the thing will be paid, the way I do things, in three months or less.  Should even be interest free.  But where to put it?  I'm glad my mother is here AND will be gone soon (other wise she would pick the perfect spot, we would have it there for a while, then she would want it moved, then again, then again, probably ending up right back where it started... for a while... women!).

The clouds are out and it looks to storm.  It's a beautiful day, save if you would want to travel far.  I don't know if we will get more than angry looking storm clouds.  I'll take it anyway.  Still, on the trip tomorrow, I think I will take the low-country interstate way to SLC rather than the pass.  The pass can have it's own weather system, local rain, sleet, snow, while everywhere else seems sunny and happy.  Driving myself I go that way, just not with company...  Hmm, well, with my friend I go that way, but he is fearless, careless, or worry-free that way too...  I think.  I guess I am saying I don't take women where angels fear to tread?  Something like that.

Menudo is cooking as we speak.  I received a few pointers on this specifically and a general tip or two, from my mom, regarding cooking.  She is sewing curtains, has hemmed some with a few more to do, and has been suggesting things now and again as well, on those matters.  I just listen.  Sometimes some things won't make sense until I am doing.  But if I listen, sometimes that comes back to me when I am trying to square a circle and not doing so well.  She did ground me from the kitchen for a while, though.  *chatter, chatter, chatter*  *Go!*  "To my room", I ask?  "Nope" she says, "You can't be gone THAT long".  Bah!  So I am blogging.

My batteries are slowly dying, but I have today, tomorrow, and then Tuesday to be on top of things.  Then I will need two days down.  I am pleased with having done what I have done.  I am a bit sore, still, but I get this sore just sitting at times.  I couldn't keep this pace up for long.  I'll crash pretty good when she goes.  But I might be able to... do a little more once I rise.  Stamina has been stretched.  All good.

Welp, have a good day.  If you can't get to Church, at least say a little or big prayer.  It's God's gift of a day to us, a little appreciation for His thoughtfulness doesn't hurt.  Later. 

Another day into town.

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I did get my haircut, picked up a couple of recliners my mother purchased, second hand, and did a bit more grocery shopping. I couldn't stop and see my friend because I was already spent while still having promised to check the mail and needing to unload two big chairs and a solid wood bedstand. Plus, whatever else might be required.

I did need a bit of help with the first chair. I didn't ask for it, and would have figured it out myself shortly. Help arrived too quickly though. So, I half killed myself getting 'help'. On the good side, my help pretty much tuckered herself out. On the second chair, I had a plan. I was able to figure it out and get it in with a quarter of the effort. Left to my devices, other than nagging to get things done, I can do wonders. If I need help I will seek help. Hrumph! Still, she was just trying to help. She should leave muscle things to me. I'm powerful, lazy in that I look for efficiency of effort, and smart enough to wrap the impossible around my finger... with a little time to puzzle something out. All done though.

My mother worked quite a bit today too. She set up a rug purchased yesterday, then completely reorganized the living room to accommodate the new chairs. Well, and cooked. I helped a bit in the kitchen, to get dinner ready. Shredding cheese has become one of my specialties. And I have dishes left, though just some pots and pans. I also brought some of the vegetables up from the basement, both for dinner and to let her know what I have and keep some at her easy disposal. I went through the mail, she went through the adverts. Then supper. She went to bed right after. I'll set up coffee for her as well.

Oh, I think I am going to ask a woman on a date, shortly. I have a few questions for her, so I am going to ask them rather directly. Uhrm, if she decides to go on the date. I have decided not to dicker too much, or too much more. When discussing things with my mother, from the look on her face, I asked if she was more afraid of me having a wife than me. She suggested she wasn't, but... Well, mom's have lots to think about with a daughter-in-law, and as much with grandchildren as an absolute intent. Yeah, she looked spooked.

I asked my mother, tonight, whether my works out here have surprised her. She admitted they do. She suggested I was well on my way to self-sufficiency... as much as men can. The obvious limit is organization and house-keeping. She honestly seemed somewhat impressed. I think she forgets who I was when I had more on the ball. I haven't changed, I simply haven't had the proper place, time, money, and health until recently to put together my plans. Having used the tools she might have thought me foolish to buy, having taken care of the furnace (once I got over a minor learning/fear curve), and having most of the supplies she has needed and wanted for cooking and cleaning have all changed her... thinking about all this. My money hasn't been simply wasted. She has seen the dividends, and liked them.

The plan was for us to get the last of the goods she purchased second-hand, a table for the sewing machine, to be placed on the new rug. I think she had some other plans, including Church and a visit with my friend tomorrow. I hate to say it, but that ain't going to happen. I am done for a while, at least until Monday. But Monday is a trip to SLC, so that can't happen. I doubt if I can even hit my room a bit. I am simply done. A few days of total R&R is required. I could probably give a wife some private time, still. But I'd need breakfast in bed. That's the one thing that doesn't seem to fade or die. I couldn't be too close to death?

Well, that's that. Have a good night.

A slow fast hot cold day.

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Yeah, well, some days just have a bit of everything.  Going to town with my mother can test my metal.  Not that she is the problem, she really isn't.  Between biology and psychology, however, along with road rash and city life, things can get itchy.  The plan was a couple of stops for each of us, possibly a oil change, and maybe an haircut.  I called about the haircut, which can't be had until tomorrow.  I also called my friend, who says he can no longer get out of his apartment.  He then hung up.  I will call him again on my way in and maybe stop by and see him.

I waited to call about the oil change until I was sure of the place.  I knew where it was, and had been successful in dealing with them in the past, so wanted to give them another chance.  I drove by and, yep, it was the place I believed it to be.  Oddly, it showed up in none of the phone book yellow pages and only one of several phone books' white pages.  I couldn't even find it online until I knew the name.  I was able to get in, but an hour after I called.  I let my mother off at the second-hand store and headed to the grocery store myself.  Time flew by, what with traffic and my list.  I was hurrying to pick her up, and decided to call to make sure she was ready.  Nope, not even close, sort of.  She wanted me to 'okay' some things, a pair of chairs.

Well, I was in a hurry, feeling late for the oil change, and... almost got very short.  I stopped, just a second, and realized it was not her I was angry with.  Actually, I wasn't angry at all, mostly.  I didn't like making a spot decision on what I didn't really like, but...  Some days you just go with things.  I okayed the chairs, she got her stuff to the checkout counter with me... pushing just a bit.  I got the stuff to the vehicle and lit the engine, then... waited.  Well, fair enough.  We made it to the oil change just a few minutes late.  No, not angry... hurried?  Frustrated?  Drowning?  Something.  It wasn't her, it was the situation(s).  No, I was a good boy today.  No bite, no bark.  Perhaps a hiss or two, but all good.

The shop paid for itself.  While the dealership had pushed a ($249) transmission fluid change, this shop said it didn't need it and wouldn't probably need one for another 10K miles (and they do it for $159).  They did suggest a new air filter and an in-cabin air filter (which I knew needed changed, and I could agree to the air filter easily, after viewing it too).  They checked for winterization, which was fine.  So, I have a new shop, one I can trust a bit more.  Two check-marks in their favor, at the Midas in Logan.  The Big-O tires in Logan has three check-marks in the good.  I'm beginning to have some good things going on.  It takes time to find your stride, get business going to the right people, and such.

This weekend should be slower.  I have over-done, but not too much.  I just need a minor breather, if I can still help and do a bit on my own.  I've had to tinker with the filter on the furnace.  They had had it jerry-rigged, but it worked.  My mother was not pleased, while I suspected they had done as good with what they had, or I have, as possible.  Sure enough, the rigging was necessary.  So I have reinstalled it, now just checking occasionally to see if I got it right.  Little bits of this and that will continue, plus I hope to sneak a little work in on my room through the weekend so the final push won't be too heavy.

I am trying to remember to thank my mother, during and after the work, for her efforts.  It has been much easier this time.  I've only had to bite my tongue three times (corn in the hamburger and bean mash, which turned out just fine, today, and one other non-issue thing).  And I have been able to keep up on her demands.  Though she hasn't been tornado-clean-crazy, either, which helps.  Not bad, not at all.  I honestly think she is enjoying her time here.  It isn't all about work.  It is as much about decor, design, and such.  She simply loves to do that sort of thing, and does it well.  She has turned this somewhat shabby batch-pad into... more of a home, and on a nickle or less.  Plus I have a few utility items that have been on my list for a long time.

It is past bedtime.  Sleep well, have a good day, you know.

Rough day, for me.

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I was able to be muscle, but I really hit it today.  I was feeling sick, fevering a bit, exhausting quickly.  I'm still not on top of it.  It looks like the travel plans have been canceled.  Rain, then snow, are a little too possible along the long drive.  With needing to be back Sunday and just the notion of icy roads, I can go with that.  When my mother decided to cancel, I suggested we take a bit of a break for the weekend, hitting things after my appointment.  My room is all that remains, inside.  I don't think the outside will get hit.  I offered to do the work, just have her... advise.  We will see.  She agreed, but the way she agreed was the way she might agree to doing something she isn't planning on doing.  I know her quite well. 

The idea, for me, is to begin sorting over the weekend, slowly.  Then empty the bedroom out for vacuuming and carpet cleaning Tuesday.  I am hoping to sneak some minor works before she begins... supervising... or simply taking the job over.  Thing is, she is sneakier and faster, on things like this, than I am.  Still, if I can buffalo her just a bit, and limp with certitude, perhaps I can throw her just enough.  *grins*  I already got her once.  She suggested lights on my trees, for Christmas.  I... grumbled... as I usually do about such suggestions.  But while in the store on my own, I bought a string of lights and more proper extension cords.  Every once in a while I can pull off a coup.

No, I have hit the end of what I can do for... a while.  Life just hurts at this point.  I have to sit, mostly.  I can still grab cans of food from the basement, move something heavy, or shred potatoes, I just can't do more than a half a dozen things.  I looked in the mirror, it shows.

Dinner arrived.  The lady who brought it didn't know my mother was here and offered to bring another plate.  No, no, I insisted.  I am always well fed to start, with the meals that come in, enough for two if I do it right, or even three meals if my appetite is weak.  Plus, between my mother being here and my own cooking, I have been eating very well lately.  Oddly, I am staying right at 260.  I gained 4 1/2 pounds from 261.5 to 266 the other day, then today I am back down to 260.  Go figure.  Anyway, at least my mother gets to see how well I do eat.  She is... satisfied, pleased.

Tomorrow?  I would still like to get the X in for an oil change and checkup.  It is well needed, deserved.  I have backed off changing oil "when recommended".  In newer vehicles it really is a waste.  Perhaps I can do a bit more shopping, while I am at it.  I am pleased with what I purchased for my mother's visit.  I have all of basics.  And, with the basics, she cooks and does enough stuff that I am seeing the holes in my prep (unsweetened cocoa powder, for example).  Yeah, well.  Still, no matter how well I prep, there will probably be little things.  In a shtf scenario, we will just not have access to what we remember.  We will have to make do.  No chocolate stuffs, no coffee unless you store, food won't be the same or nearly as tasty or easy.  So be it, at this point there isn't a choice.  There will be no parachute.  Wait until all of America is like Long Island.  They can't even handle one area, think about tens of thousands of such areas?  It's coming.

Well, on to... life.  Good day, good night.  Yes, sleep will come early, I think, tonight.  Sleep well.

To bed late, up late.

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With the work I have been doing, I have been sleeping quite well with a window open and my door shut.  With the furnace set at 70 I am usually on the verge of overheating too.  Never to worry.  I was goofing last night and lost track of the time.  My mother peeked out at about 3:00 and asked if I planned to get up in the morning.  Oh, fine.  So I shut the machine down and crashed quite well.  Up a bit before noon though.  She wasn't up too much earlier though, sleeping through her phone and nearly hitting 10:00.  We worked, then went shopping though yesterday.

One of the things on my list, for a while, has been a steam cleaner.  Renting presents too many problems.  My problem had been that research was not coming to a good conclusion.  I didn't like any of the answers, or questions.  One of the things my mother wanted was to rent or buy such a device.  I hate the smell of most rentals, and feel like I'm bringing someone else's stench into my home.  Plus, renting means returning, and for me that could get very expensive very quickly, with one slip of the mind.  She backed Hoovers, so we went looking.  That is what I woke to this morning.  Gladly, the carpets and area rug weren't too bad.  What I feared I would find, moving the couch, simply didn't exist.  The bad spots were clearly visible from the beginning.  The machine is a breeze to use, and clean, even for me.  It will see use after the cats... do their thing.  Cat tested already.  Just as my mother finished the living room and was hitting an area rug, Sam decided to give us a test.  My mom almost cried.  I can tell she is getting tired, the trip coming up and then V.A. appointment day will give her a much needed break.  Sam is banished until the noisemaker is finished, for her own sake!

Two days ago, all we had really hit was the kitchen.  We started to spread out.  Today?  We have pretty much the whole of the downstairs, laundry, and... the inside, done.  My mother is just casting about with arranging things now.  I am not awake enough.  And we ate right off.  Both trying to eat too quickly and trying to work to early after waking are mistakes.  Together?  I am going through cold sweats.  I told my mom I HAD to back down and sit for an hour or two.  I can't do that.  Usually she is good, but today's late start got her going, I think.  I move much more and I will lose my cookies.  It doesn't matter how soft, easy, or slow.  I need time to get the gears to mesh in the morning.  Period.

Oh, well, there is my bedroom.  When we return from the trip, I am going to clean it, having my mom just check on my progress and point and click.  There are things to do outside, but I am going to try to get her to relax her last week here.  As... much as she can.  She is a tornado at 70, it is probably what keeps her whole and going.  I don't want to trip that up either.  Bah, she can find something to do, and will.  The world is her playground.

Have a good day.  I will.  It's been good work, until this morning.  It'll get back on track in an hour or two.

I am slowing her down.

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Actually, I think though, slowing her down is a quality.  She, like me, sees the whole world and tries to do it all at once.  Unlike me, she doesn't know she has hit her limit until she is seriously sore.  I know upfront, as it happens.  And, my home needs a lot of work.  We have done a lot of work.  I have been putting in what I can.  Windows?  I can do those.  She hands me the stuff and points.  She has to wait for a bit sometimes, but if she will, I get to it.  Need furniture moved?  Not a problem, at all.  Need clothes in or out?  I can do that.  I can even cook a meal once in a while, help with dishes, and lots of things.  I even, sometimes, slide my work sideways.  She wants this, I start on that, get it done, and see some other things along the way and do those.  I think she has mellowed, and slowed a bit, but it makes this process much easier, and more successful.

I am amazed I have been able to stick with it this well.  Like I said though, when I hit my limits, she sees it now.  And, too, now that it isn't "just mental" according to the doctors, she realizes that when I hit the wall I really have to stop.  She now sees the symptoms of exhaustion as just that.  Oh, I don't blame her for pushing before.  None of us knew the truth.  A good parent will try to push her fledgling a bit.  I did it myself.

My home is really looking good.  On top of that we have been eating well.  She wanted to try some of my freeze-dried chicken stuff.  I mostly bought that for 'others' because chicken just isn't my favorite.  She added some of the canned chicken as well (also not my favorite).  I hadn't tried it, yet, so it was all good.  Actually, it tasted better than what I thought it would.  She was quite happy with it too.  All good.

I know, after my home is set up again, I will be calling the power company to get a energy audit.  I would like to make some plans to seal the house up a bit more.  I bought a window dressing for the spare bedroom, but it wasn't the good stuff and doesn't work really well.  So, I will need to get out, next time I am out, and get a more serious plastic weathering.  She thinks we can get curtains in upstairs, as well.  We priced the materials for 'blackout' curtains, and it is less expensive, but will take time.  The sewing machine she gave me, and I hauled around, does work.  I bought oil, needles, and thread for it.  She thinks if I figure out putting up curtains, she can sew the curtains.  I am not sure if there is time this visit, so I might actually try to get to that myself.  We'll see.  Hey, I have always wanted nice shirts, sewing my own would be the only way to get custom shirts.  It's been on my mind.

Well, it's back to work.  The living room and my bedroom are all that really remain.  It's amazing how dust-free my home actually is.  Still, working in one room always ends up dragging stuff through the clean rooms, so it's been a chore to keep it all up, for the moment.  I sure hope to keep it up a bit better this time.  Maybe with getting back on medication I might be able to do it, or do it better.  I will just have to see about a lot of things.

Have a good day.

Busy even on a slower day.

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I had to go slower today.  I am too stiff and sore to do more.  Tomorrow will be the same.  Perhaps Tuesday I can get back to a bit more.  Even on a slow day I am doing more than usual(tm).  My mother?  She gets on a task and pretty much stays on it.  I will help when and how I can, even picking up on a few things she didn't direct me to do, if doing other things a little slower than she would like.  I can only have so much going on at one time, in real life.  Still, I think she has been happy enough with my help and the muscle I can throw at things.  I think she has gotten a bit tired herself, so slowed down today.  I am hoping she takes it easy on herself tomorrow as well.  She and I are similar, in that when we do start some things, we simply don't stop until it is done or we crash hard.

She is 70, has had a hip and both knees replaced, plus two major back surgeries (the last one quite successful), and many foot surgeries.  She just doesn't have a "slow" button.  She can stop, when things are set up to her standards, but not really until then.

I think, once set back up, I can coast well until she returns in the spring.  I am hoping just to work on a small garden with her when she returns.  She suggests, if I want to try to grow tomatoes from seed, that I will actually need to begin those in January-February.  Well, okay.  I think I can do that.  Maybe a dozen plants to begin, hoping half of those make it?  Perhaps a few other plants, say peppers?  In any case, the hope is that when she returns it will just be about plants and a garden.  Oh, we will see.

Food has been great.  She has enjoyed having food on tap, staples in store, and good pots, pans, baking pans, and the rest, of good quality and in plenty.  I doubt if even the best restaurants she has worked in have been this well set... at least compared to demands.  I don't know how she works to exhaustion, though, then takes a break to make a huge meal, clean up (I have been drying dishes (when I realize she is even washing and get out there before she just "does them")).  And I have cooked or otherwise prepared a few meals myself.  We both love good home-cooked food.

Just an update.  Be well.  Good night.

Home alone?

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Speaking with my mother, I mentioned something about the commercial for Home Alone.  The neighbor boy who had that look on his face some time back.  Watching the commercial further, she admitted something.  I'm not exactly sure how to take it.  She said I was like that kid, when I was little.  She said, given half the chance, I would have or did those types of things.  She suggested that she kept me fairly well... regulated... for that reason.  I don't remember it, but who does?  I was surprised though.

What do you think?  Is that a good thing or a bad thing?  Is it just the way it is, neither good nor bad?  I'm thinking on it myself.

Yeah, well...

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I am pretty much done for a day or two.  Two days of working and a day of shopping, even at a slower pace, has me pretty much done in.  To add to it I nicked myself quite well today.  Even after taking normal care of it, the blood kept flowing.  It took an hour to slow that flow.  We had to add more material and wrap it heavily.  My left hand is barely usable as I type.  At least it looks like the blood has stopped.  I am taking a bit of a break from the little that went forward this morning.  I need to make some appointments this afternoon.

It has been fantastic having fresh cooked home-made food several times a day.  I help out there, too.  Chop onions?  I can do that.  Open cans, find corn starch, find a certain type of bowl, sure.  Tonight I will be making fried chicken.  I have been helpful but I can't keep up, at all.  I need frequent breaks, though I can get a lot done when she has a list of things I can do quickly.

It is snowing here.  It is off and on, some is sticking now.  I doubt if it will last though.  I sure enjoy it, if too I don't have to drive through it. 

Good day.

Work is going well.

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My mother has been able to get me going.  Of course I am missing some of the things I need/ed to do, but I will be picking those up.  She is sort of like a tornado, pulling in those near her, and she breaks my meager concentration with her will.  Still, she is doing things I want done so it works.  She isn't pulling on me too hard, mostly.  The thing though is that she never knows when to shut down.  She has given me time to recoup, but then she either starts up again or keeps going and then re-engages me.  The woman doesn't stop.

The kitchen is in perfect order (according to me).  Windows from the kitchen back have been de-cobwebbed and washed, inside and out.  Much of the laundry has been done.  She finished the bathroom.  Pillows have been aired out.  Two or three meals have been made and cleaned up after (including a huge, complex, chicken mole with corn, mashed potatoes, and cheese and onion quesadillas.  Boxes have been torn down.  The kitchen has been re-ordered.  I am sure that is only some of what has happened.  Oh, no fear, your fearless leader has had his hand in much.  While not a tornado myself, I make excellent large block debris which can help with the "destructive nature" of the phenomenon.  I am often the muscle, and do so easily.

The trip to my cousin's has been planned, weather dependent.  We expect rain/sleet/snow this weekend.  Hopefully that will be done and gone before our travel plans are ruined though.  I haven't seen this cousin in at least a decade.  And more, he was about an half a generation behind most of us cousins, so I never knew him well.  I won't say more than that he lives in what some are calling the redoubt.  Unfortunately, a bit far for regular contact.  I am not looking forward to the long drive, I am looking forward to seeing him and his wife again.

Today?  Probably shopping, setting up a couple of appointments, and whatever else my mom decides to get into.  I actually am doing okay.  I don't mind hard work, so long as I can take some breaks.  And she has the notion of what to do, so I only have to think about my little corner of it.  Now, while I am doing something, I often slide into extra, more, better.  I can think around corners, while I am doing something.  It is getting to thinking about them in the first place that is the problem.  Well, or getting to my thinking.  One side or the other is always enough off that nothing gets done.  Not so with someone around who has learned to negotiate my situation.

I best get a shower and get going.  She is napping.  I think she overdid, herself, a bit yesterday.  All good on my long and short count, we have three weeks after all.

Changes.

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As my health has been figured out, I am sort of waking into a very dark world.  As I arrange my life, finally, the rest of the world is falling apart.  So be it.  I, like always, will live where I am as I can.  However, I cannot ignore the signs and portents.  I must consider my place in this new paradigm, or at least more open version of it.  I haven't completely decided what changes will take place, but I know some of them immediately.  Public comments on politics, or even politically affiliated considerations, must end.  That includes, and particular, with my family.  Life is now considered dangerous.  Who knows who would pass on what, even seemingly to them innocently.  There are other problems with communicating such.

I have to think there have been people in the past who realized the situation and tried to extricate themselves in order to save themselves.  I also know what I am considering is not good in the long term.  It has failed, for larger groups right down to individuals almost every time it has been attempted.  I don't have a long term.  And while there is the good of the whole to consider, as I see it, the whole chose their fate.  They were headed this way before I was born, they are simply on a faster and faster track.  I take heart in some of Christ's last words... Forgive them, for they know not what they do.  For my part and for theirs, as possible as not.

I must figure out, as a man who has lived quite openly for most of my life, to shut off some things.  Some information can no longer be transmitted, in any form.  Opinions and thoughts must be regulated.  No, they won't change, they simply cannot be shared.  If I had children, they too would be excluded to some degree, less so if home-schooling though.  At least I am not in the droves who are about to be added to the unemployment line.  And I already receive socialized medicine, so I won't have to face that as a new level of bureaucracy in my life.  And I am learning to live more and more off the grid, shut down, and simply do what I do.  I fear the cost increases in fuel, electricity, and such.  Though I am not sure it would have mattered who won on that score.  I think it has been decided, by both parties, to charge more for power.

The main thing, for me now, is to figure out how to live in a third-world nation.  That would have been going on either way, though a little less so in some ways with a different outcome.  I will only warn you, that if you disagree, disagree privately and quietly.  You are now a target.  That is the last time I will speak on any such matters.  Good luck

A day of some works.

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My mother has been doing her thing, and I have been helping when and where I can.  I can't do much more than I usually do, but I can be directed, or redirected, from time to time.  There is a lot of work to do.  The kitchen is back in play, fully.  Of course, everything has been moved, but that sort of has to be done to do it right.  For "slowing down" she still moves like a freight train.  Though I do see that she is slowing down some, fair enough.  She still moves faster and better than any common, and most uncommon, domesticated man-types.  Then again, she was still suffering from jet-lag, so I am not sure she actually has slowed.

I saw the election sliding into the toilet last night.  Before Ohio, Iowa, and Nevada were called, it was bed time.  I realized, however, that Romney had lost.  How much was due to malfeasance?  Quite a bit is my guess.  Enough?  In any case, since I believe Romney was aiming to win (unlike McCain?), and with his... acumen, I doubt he would have ceded if any false voting was undoable.  At this point what corruption exists is baked into the cake, as they say.

I don't see this as a personal loss, I see it as the beginning of the national decline and the return to world norms, tribal socialism.  At this point it is every man for himself.  Food is set to soar next year, unemployment will continue and grow as small businesses shutter, to be replaced by international corpa, who don't hire locals.  Taxes will soar.  Zerocare is now not just for veterans.  America is... dead.  The dream of free men in a free nation has been surrendered.  I wish you all luck.  We are now numbers for bureaucrats in Washington, they claim now to own us, our wallets, the rest.  The demographic bomb has exploded. Well, on to the rest of life, I suppose.

Later.  Or maybe not.  I suspect my mother will be keeping me busy, and I tire quickly, leaving little time for writing.

Done. For what it was worth.

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My mother was having jet-lag today.  All good, for me!  I woke at about 7:00-7:30, even after going to bed after 1:00.  I pretty much just tinkered, though coffee was ready for her right off.  The snack bars have been a boon as she gets her feet under her.  Yeah, it's a messy job, but she is good for it when she catches her breath.  Actually, she started in a bit tonight.  I showed off my larder, before heading out to vote.  My big canner showed up as well.  She... did appreciate the quality.  It reminds her of the canner her mother used.

I showered and got out to vote.  The line was non-existent, but then I went in just a bit after 15:00.  Around here that is usually work-time and school.  Perfect.  I voted as I said I would.  I couldn't hold my nose with McCain, I have to  with Romney, as I see it.

My mom wanted fresh onions, so I decided to run to town.  I got a few other things while I was there, garlic, potatoes, a bit more soda.  I also got out from under her feet for a while.  She started in on the kitchen.  Yeah, it's a good time to go.  Plus, if I am too handy, she tries to have me jumping to do something every five.  This way she has a list of things for me to do.  Stop and go traffic kills me, but a small list is eminently doable.  Find space for these, glasses for the plastic utensils, put this up there, bring that up there down, all at once rather than this now, that in five minutes, etc.  Drives me nuts to try to help in 'her moment'.

She is rather put out with Sam and Sassy about them vomiting.  She tells me she wouldn't put up with it, and it would wear her out too.  But she would most likely put them down.  I simply won't.  Nor will I follow her suggestion of shutting them up in one room, letting them out when I want them out.  That... doesn't work.  She has never had a cat like these, she says.  Perhaps, or maybe she just doesn't remember?  Dunno.

Now to sit back at watch.  I'm using AoSHQ election site to track things.  He has done rather good in the past.  If you want to watch, if nothing else this site offers another option to check on things.

Have a good one.

Election day.

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The options are not optimal, and I mean that in every way.  Still, it is quite true that one of two will be the president when the election is completed.  Ron Paul will not win.  Johnson has no chance to be president.  Either Romney or Zero will be president.  Beside the 47%'ers, and the (at this point) 2% of election malfeasance, there is little room for a win, assuming most conservative type folks do what they usually do, stay home.  I don't like any of it.  I really don't wish to vote.  But it is what I can do in that forum.

While living your life your way is one way to vote with your wallet, feet, etc., what happens when the right to do so is taken from you?  Rights are, and have been, eroding for generations.  Though, to be honest, much of what passes for rights never were meant to be rights, too.  We were, I think, never quite expected to do, or be able to do, much of what we do.  Some libertarians, including myself, sometimes don't fully understand that.  I keep... bumping into things myself.  Libertine, libertarian, conservative, even liberal and left, have some very distorted views due to life in an age of technological wonders.  Those wonders are no more a right, let alone a good.  Texting?  Cell phones?  Transportation on demand?

I think, in forgotten times, men probably did have technology that came close to what we have now, I do.  I think either those times were lost due to the inability of men to keep the thing going, a series of natural disasters, or even a realization that such a life was not worth living.  We keep coming back to pinnacles, golden ages, then... surrendering them.  The extremes in either direction are... untenable.  In one we are forced to live like animals, and stealing and murder are just other methods of getting food and protect our food sources.  On the other end, everything we need and much of what we want can be delivered to our door in two days, less if we wish to pay just a bit more.  We have no real needs.  But too, we have to do exactly what we are told, when we are told.  We become cogs, numbers, just one of the many of the faceless masses.  We surrender our souls to have what we want, when we want it.

Is there a sane balance?  Can it be maintained?  When we do well we constantly improve.  When we get some, we find out how to get more, better, faster.  I don't know if there is a way to keep the drive while avoiding the excess.  The drive is so strong.  Our abilities outstrip our humility, humanity, sanity.  We try to climb on our humility to gain power, wealth, whatever else.  My health holds me in place, and is therefore a gift, save that it depends on... well... a world of cogs which can be milked.  Gah!

Never mind.  As I said, I have decided to lend my vote to Romney.  I don't think he is the best choice, if I think the Republican field for the office was thin anyway and the Libertarian choices were no better.  Perhaps my unhappiness is an extension of the more, better, faster notion the modern world has brought me?  Perhaps I simply can't be satisfied?  Dunno.  Lots of questions, no good answers.  Well, at least I could like Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan, should they happen to become social circle staples.  There is that.  And, that might not be all bad.

Not bad, not bad at all.

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Oh, well, my home was still a bit rough when I left to pick my mother up from the airport.  But I did get in a last spurt of cleaning-fu before heading out.  Fresh bedding on her bed, towels washed and put in the dryer, all but the very last few dishes done, and even a bit of work on the Xterra.  In any case, I ran out of time so just hopped in and headed out. 

As I was approaching SLC, a good half hour to hour from the airport, my mother called to say she was just about to leave Denver.  Hmm?  I suggested she hurry up, I was almost there!  A bit of a chuckle on her end, but what can she do?  Either the trip had been changed, or... what?  I get to town and take the wrong turn-off.  That one catches me from time to time, I use it so rarely.  No matter, I wanted to fill the tank and look for a car wash.  After driving as far on that road, and not seeing a car wash or a station with one, I simply filled up and headed back out to the airport.  Time was getting a little tight, if she really was to be there on time.

The first load of passengers were disembarking as I took my seat.  Since she is given a wheelchair ride, I figured she would be the last.  And usually she calls me to let me know she has landed.  Cellphone dead?  I watch as the last of the footed passengers come and go.  Then I watch as the carted come and then go.  No Mom.  Well, as I like to do, when all else fails... wait longer.  And so I did.  Two hours beyond the time she should have arrived I finally get the call, but she isn't where she said she would be.  She has been wheeled outside.  A bit of searching and, there she is.  All good.  While discussing things I realized that while most idiots changed their clocks last Sunday, I proved once again, I am no idiot.  :p  One hour could have been the time change, but why where the rest of my clocks even an hour further off?  No, no, I changed them last time.  Perhaps the clock faeries where dyslexic?  Dunno.  All clocks save my watch (too tired to tinker with that for tonight) and my auto have been corrected.

She was... mostly satisfied.  She didn't expect much and was pleasantly unsurprised, or rough, about it.  She went to bed rather quickly.  I just couldn't as is often the case.  I've set the coffee for her, and will be heading to bed shortly.  She will be trying to get me up, along with my alarm, in time to wake, shower, dress, and vote tomorrow.  Yeah, I am voting.  I would have voted anyway, just I wasn't so sure about voting for the lead office.  I have, finally, decided that, yeah, there are only two real choices.  One might continue the wrecking of America, but one most certainly will destroy America.  Quick or slow.  I don't hold out much hope for more.  They both have advantages, though slow offers some hope of redemption (not economic, of course, that is nearly impossible at this point).  The other offers zero(tm) hope, and worse.  It's that simple.

Tired, so very tired, but I have things to do in the next few days, and my mom will want me to help with her things.  I don't have a lot left.  I tried to pace it but that isn't something I have full control over.  Oh, I'll limp through.  If I have to, I'll take long naps.  At least she is looking good, healthy.  Don't you worry, this place will be shipshape in no time.  Three days she says, just on the house.  Three days, I think?  Hmm, that would be like... two months for me.  Never mind.

Good night.

Slow but sure?

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I didn't wake until 9:00 this morning.  I woke twice in the night, which is rather unusual.  But as I was getting the girls fed I noticed the back door was wide open!  Someone had been in here.  I KNOW I didn't leave the back door open, it is winterish out there!  That, I realize, is why I woke up.  It is why whoever was here didn't close the door too, they were in a rush to get out as quietly and quickly as possible.  It sucks to be the only one here.  A woman would have heard that and woken me.  I just woke, didn't know what I woke for.

Hmm, things to do today.  Too many things, really.  I will begin sorting through the chores shortly.  I am still moving a bit extra slow though.  I managed to stub my toe this morning, letting Sam back in after letting her out (an open door) after feeding her.  The good thing is the toe hurt and bled.  I didn't hurt the bone, I scraped the skin on top.  While it is bad, it is good too.  It means my toes are still quite sensitive and bleed easily and well.  Both diabetes and heart trouble can leave the feet without sensitivity or blood flow, all of which is bad news.  Get a lemon?  Make lemonade. 

Just... waking.  Not much else to say.  Good day.

A low and slow day.

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Making it to bed early and then rising early seemed good.  I crashed, though, after being up for about four hours.  I have been pushing things a bit.  Fine, fine, so long as I can get a few more things done.  My mother will just have to understand that I am not even as spry as I used to be.  Hmm, probably better to have me out of the way most of the time, anyway.

I did begin trying to track those guys down.  I found dozens of leads, none of them panning out.  I did find a picture of one of the guys I am looking for, from archives.  I don't have a date on the picture, though, for reference.  I found out about his divorces, and looked tentatively for either of his former wives.  No luck on any of the scores.  I do know a bit more about him.  The others... not a thing.  Not a clue.  Nothing, as if they simply vanished, or maybe never where!  I will do some more digging tomorrow.  I am not even sure what other tools are publicly available.  I have several now, but it hasn't proved out.  I would also like to call our district deputy and discuss a few things with him.  Tomorrow afternoon, I am thinking.  I had hoped to do that today but it got to be too late as my searches failed and I kept... chugging away.  He might even know of a few tools of which I am unaware.

A very slow day.  I did manage to fry another pan of chicken drumsticks though.  Quite good.  I needed, and still feel the need, for some solid good food.  When I run a bit too hot, a bit too long, my desire for food grows terribly.  I do, however, believe my desire far outstrips my need, if my need is real.  So, I try to watch it.  If I had too much easy food, or a full time cook, I could easily over-indulge and end up right back at 350.  I love me some food, more so when I try to push through my fragile health. 

Tomorrow?  A bit more searching.  The last of the dishes.  Trash and recycling out.  My mom's bedroom sorted, laundering the linens and all.  And the bathroom needs some final touches.  Well... uhrm... those are ON the list.

Now for the last of the chicken, a bit of goofing, and then to bed early again.  Good night.

Sleep will be easy tonight.

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In spite of getting fired up and, eventually, going today I will be able to sleep easily tonight.  I am barely hanging on at 21:00.  Actually, I just had a few last things to do and had to push it to get them done.  I could have been in bed an hour or two ago.  It must be that trying to run two 'hot' days together is simply more than my body will take.  I needed time to cool down yesterday, not so tonight, at all.

I called my mother.  She checked the itinerary.  While it did change, as the email suggested, it was a change of one minute... somewhere.  That was it.  I think she can live with that.  I also looked over the Kindle 4G again.  It is in the basket.  After my mother's visit and that, with the tires on and the pressure cooker on the way, I will be holding off spending for some time, to build reserves back up.  I am keeping level on my 'nest egg', but just.  This visit may... set that back a bit.  But just a bit.  I have planned for most of it, and much of the expense has already been paid, save the trip.  But there is money set aside for that on top.  It is just that... sometimes expenses arise.

While my life isn't picture perfect, I am keeping things going.  I have a bit of savings, just in case I do happen to die... for expenses.  But also for an ongoing life.  I have food stores, and more going in if at a slower pace.  I have my bills expensed and well tended.  My vehicle needs to be tended a bit better, but...  I suppose I could try a little harder to get the medicines that do work, but I am limited in how much effort I can truly put together for that.  Really, it's a small life, but a good one.  I am almost becoming a simple Hobbit type!  It is something I have always sort of sought.  Too many things stood in the way.  I suppose my aspirations vexed by my health has been the tripping point.  Now that I'm not stumbling in the blind about what is wrong I can... retire a bit... more surely... with some understanding.

I have become a humble simple man of limited by reasonable means.  I am learning to fit the shell that seems to have been given to me.  It is not a bad life.  It is just that my potential is exponentially beyond this.  I should be crafting the world, not my Hobbit-home and life.  I should be sculpting ideas into practical realities.  If nothing else, I should at least be warring to keep kin and kith safe and sound.  Instead I am shaping this very little piece of life and home.  It is growing on me though.  And I am... pushing in a few areas.  Ah well, there are much worse things.  Perhaps this is how Father really wanted things.  And, as I said, some parts of me have always wanted this too.  If like most groups, places, and things I have done, I do not quite fit the shell, mold, group.  Gah!  How can you be too angry about stumbling upon a pile of domestic gold?  Or humble but reasonably so living?  Or good neighbors?  Or a place in religious life, mostly?  A wife would complete my happy misery.  *grins*

Good night.

Wasn't sure the wings would unfurl today.

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The plan was to be off to town in the morning, for a tire change.  That went over like a molten mildew.  I was up by 8:00 or so, I think.  Fussed with the alarm a time or two, I think.  So, technically, I was awake in time.  Getting going was a whole other animal.  Just getting to the shower was messy and slow.  But a fine shower was had.  I washed, then just soaked for about an half hour, then air dried for an good hour.  Nice!  Clean, super duper clean, too.  Not until 13:00-13:30 did I find my way out the door.  I had hoped to clean the vehicle out a bit first, but that just wasn't going to happen.  Beside having stretched things greatly, time-wise, already, I simply didn't have the steam to do that.  Thankfully, for a bit over $900, I have new tires all around.  My mind is at ease.

Now, I didn't get to a oil change shop, or the coffee house.  I realized that early and just decided to let that be a Monday thing anyway.  I did, however, remember to pick up meat I had asked to be wrapped and forgot at the store yesterday.  Hmm, 15 pounds of hamburger in 1.5 pound packages, plus four New York Strip steaks, two to a package.  I also grabbed a pound and an half of raw medium shrimp plus four fish steaks, while I was at it this time around.  Pricey, but...  That should see me, the way I eat, even with my mother here, through several months though.  I can't believe I forgot that yesterday.  Glad they still had it, set back for me.

I can take some rest time, working on finding those individuals for the KoC and resting up for Monday.  Oh, wait, maybe not quite.  My mother arrives Monday.  Hmm.  I will have to try to get an oil change in tomorrow(tm).  :p

I have most things set, the dishes are almost done, food is on hand, new tires are in play, and I am... staying up on things a bit.  Nothing is perfect.  It is better than past visits though.  And it sure beats the slog this summer and most of the fall turned out to be.  Food is going in the medium and short term larder.  The pressure canner will be here just in time for my mother to eye it over.  (She'll be a bit put out, even if I can prove it's technical superiority and longevity compared to her device(s), she wanted me to save on that since she is thinking of moving out.)  Hey, mom doesn't always get her way, you know!

I received a thank you letter too.  It amazes me what others can do with what I think of as... a little extra.  It is humbling.  The grand schemes of the lion are nothing compared to the humble perpetual doings of the field mice.  What is a roar compared to the humble meek squeak?  I dunno, too melancholy, too... something.   I won't go there any further.  It was just nice to be able to help one human, and know it.

Well, on to goofing, until I can calm a bit and... think...  Good day.

Huh? Hmm, interesting.

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Okay, so I didn't wake at 6:00 or even 7:00.  I can't now tell you, somewhere between 7:30 and 8:00-something.  Waking wasn't bad, when it finally happened.  I have eaten a couple 'snack bars', had some caffeine, and am goofing.  I am not seriously tired, or out of it, I am simply not moving fast.  I need to get another shower, look over the tires in question online, and such.  Well, and while I put everything away that needed to be frozen or refrigerated, I still have a bit that needs to go to the larder or be sorted up here.  Hey, I was pleased with what I did get done yesterday.  And that today promises a few more things.

I may call the tire shop, though, and see if the afternoon would be fine.  We didn't have a particular time, so that might work.  And afternoon was a choice, one I thought I could pass on.  I need to review my shopping list as well.  A pot of coffee could go on, too.

Oh, I finally checked my mail.  There must be a month and some of mail!  Two bills from my what-had-been nearly paid credit card, so definitely more than one month.  The tires are too pricey, either way, to pay with cash alone.  I might even just put them wholly on my card, since I had more than paid it off (I think I would have had $60 overpaid on the card (my only credit card, by the way).  Dunno, thinking on that.

Well, on to... my morning round-up, prep, and doings.  Have a good day.

The dragon finds his wings.

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I did not lift off as early as had been hoped, not leaving until shortly before 13:00 for an appointment at 14:00.  I was able to get to town in time to have a bagel and coffee.  I called to offer to bring the same to the man with whom I would be working but he had just dined.  So I scoffed my goodies and headed to his home for...  Actually I had no idea what to expect.  As it turned out, we went over the roster, focusing on those members with whom little or no contact has been had in some time, years for most of them.  Some, through various sources, my fellow knight was able to track.  Others remained quite elusive.  As well, we went over the list of active and senior members.  Some of the senior members, it is his hope, will be made life-time members.

Beside getting members involved, and trying to keep them involved, there is also a business reason for retention, of course.  While they are on our roles, whether they pay dues or not, our group must pay state and "federal" fees for those on our roles.  Now, there is a method by which to remove those who no longer wish to participate and those who cannot be contacted, but a specific course of actions must take place.  A record of those actions, and any correspondence, must be used to the end of clearing a member from our ranks.  State, of course, does not wish to lose membership (or the dues).  We, of course, do not wish to lose members but do not wish to pay for non-members.  There is a bit more going on than I had fully known, if I suspected from things said over time.

In any case, after several hours of working on a number of members, tracking and actually bringing one back for sure, I was given homework.  A number of members are completely lost, as to contact information.  None of my fellow's contacts could offer any information on some of these.  One fall-away member has an address in the state rolls, so we will try to contact him.  I will draft a letter, and with the knight I am working with and our senior knight, we will decide on that letter.  Not so much because one letter is important, though it has some importance too, more that we want to create a form letter for such cases in the future.  And there are rules, and decorum, as well as simply ensuring the information, all of it, needed to be relayed, is included.  So, I have a little work to do, and it was suggested that it would "be good" to have my work done and have another meeting Monday or Tuesday.  Striking while the iron is hot, and I think I can do that.

After the meeting I decided to do some shopping.  I purchased most of what my mother wanted, and most of what I wanted.  I remembered my list, well... where it was.  Right there, at home, where I had drafted it.  So I had to work blind.  I still haven't compared the list to what I bought.  I know I only added a number of cheeses to the list, the rest was on the list.  What I don't know is how much, if anything, of the list I missed.

Before I went to town, I called around for new tires.  With a long trip planned while my mother is here, I just... have to do that.  Tomorrow morning, it seems, I will be driving back into town.  The choice boils down to Big-O tires or the original tires that came with the vehicle.  I will do a bit of checking tonight, comparing the two.  Big-O tires come with a three year warranty, but I am more worried about 35-40k than three years to be honest.  Oh, I'll look.  I'll compare.  After that, I will look for a place to get an oil change and tune-up.  I have a place in mind.  If they can't fit me right in I will see when they can or find another place.  I am also hoping to check on a haircut and finishing any shopping I may have missed.  Coffee!  But what else?  And, by the way, I did order a 30 quart All-American pressure canner.  I delayed the canning tools and such, I just don't have it right now.  But at 2/3rds off, I didn't want to miss that price.  The rest will come over time.

I am tired.  I should hit it, but as usual, when I do a bit more during the day, sleeping can be a bit of a problem.  I will set the alarm and hope it all just happens from that point.  Oh, I did finish the dishes that were rinse-soaking, which is part of why I was late getting out.  I then set, nearly, the last load to be washed to soak.  I also cleaned up my mutton chops with the trimmer, then shaved the cut-outs clean...  It takes time to look as good as I do.  Grrrrrhahaha!

Well, just so you know, I haven't kicked the bucket.  And I can still motate a bit.  Good night.

Another resting day.

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Another day of rest.  I almost literally did nothing yesterday and am happy for it.  I was sore, wrung out, done.  I do hope to do two or three very small things today.  No real plans, no intent, just... as the day goes by I want to do a bit more.  The girls woke me two or three times last night.  I don't know why, either.  It is unusual for them.  Then, first thing this morning, Sassy vomits.  I had had enough.  The girls got a two hour time-out, banished to the outside.  No food, no water, just OUT!  Poppo was just a bit put out with them this morning, and I am pretty sure Sassy vomited in protest to not being fed, in spite of knowing that scratching at the door all night puts him in a 'mood'.

I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon.  I may try to be in early, to get some of the dry-goods shopping done.  Then, after the meeting, go do some of the shopping for stuff that has to be brought home more swiftly.  I doubt if I will get to all of the shopping in one day.  Simply put there are two many stores and too many supplies for a one-man run.  Well, at least for this man.  Remember, I have to pace things.

Another thing of note, dealing with medicine and my legs.  My legs have been a dark color for a long time.  Vascular problems from the heart has caused blood to soak into the legs.  Doctors have told me nothing would help this, that wearing constricting socks(tm) was the only way to stop it from getting worse.  I, foolishly, believed them.  I have been putting my legs up, a few hours a day off and on, for the last six months, just because though.  The other day, while drying off, I noticed something about my feet and legs.  It was... disturbing.  But I couldn't put my finger on it right away.  Then, a few days later, it hit me.  They are... becoming skin colored!  I had to take my socks off, right then, and see if that indeed was what I had seen.  True enough.  Now, my legs will never be normal again, but... they are almost human now, not that deep red/rust.  Stupid doctors either know nothing or are just louts.  Neither informative, correct, or even helpful.  Why or to what end they are and do what they are and do I will never know.  Don't trust doctors.  Ever.  Fuckers.

Well, on to my day. 

Rest, cats, news, and politics.

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Oh, sure, I can rest today.  And tomorrow.  And I will.  A few tasks may go forward, little things.  Kept from becoming all-out assaults on my task list though.  While I agree with the notion of resting, I don't like it.  Something about striking while the iron is hot and all.  I have learned, if I want to be able to function for a while I can't do what I did in my younger days.  Still my body doesn't have a stoke-limiter.  It's either on or off, and right now it is on.  Never mind, I'll do my best.

Some information about cats from one who... thinks?  I have been baffled by Sam's emittances.  Continually vomiting, she was a great annoyance in this regard.  The vets didn't seem to know why, or think there was anything to be concerned about.  And a few times, from the remnants, it was clear the problem was that she had a 'mouse in her throat', or at least needed to get rid of the indigestible parts of such.  But the rest?  Ah, it finally came to me.  Sassy!  While Sam is not Sassy's mother, she is an older female.  Kittens do two things to their mother.  First, they demand milk.  Milk, milk, milk, and more milk, for a very long time, as long as they can stretch that out.  The next thing they demand is... undigested food... in the form of vomitus.  Ah-ha!  So... that is what was happening.  As I said, Sam did not birth Sassy.  Still, the interactions might well be the same.  Sassy knows how to get Sam to vomit, and Sam has no way to defend against that.  So, now I, and you, know.  Much has been forgiven.  None are at fault.  All was a natural cause and effect.  The vets SHOULD have known this, though.  Bad on them.

I read this article and had to laugh.  The suggestion is that smarter people drink more, ostensibly because drinking is a modern form of getting a buzz from eating rotten fruit.  And smart people would rather use "techy" stuff.  What idiots.  Of course, most people who write these things are "smart people", and shy in their own favor by miles.  Truth be told, "smart people" are miserable people.  This coming from the mouth of a "smart man".  Why are smart people miserable?  First, many of us think we can do it on our own, that there is a way to 'the good life'(tm) without God, rules, morals save as we see fit (as if we were constant).  As well, we understand how thin the veil that keeps life kosher and civil, something much more to our liking.  We know how little it would really take to cause the world to descend into madness.  And without faith for many of the "bright", hope is weak and fear grows.  Drinking, therefore, is often a replacement for faith.  It is a poor substitute.  There are other reasons for smart people, and anybody, to drink too.  But many smart people are social misfits.  Drinking does help with this.  As well, drink can... expand the mind.  It removes barriers and allows for more purely theoretical thinking.  I have seen amazing stuff while inebriated... some of it panned out later, some... not so much.  Silly researchers.

For a down day, more is already done that planned.

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After working a number of days I begin to get what I call heart-sick.  It isn't tired, though that is there.  It isn't this or that.  Nothing else is quite like it.  Today is one of those days.  Oh, it doesn't mean I am dying, that I can't do more, or anything.  It just means if I don't slow down my body will do it for me.  It's a signal.  Today, therefore, was going to a be a low day.  I have done a few things, then a big thing came up.  My food came in.  The grains and legumes for a year.

The guy brought the pails to the back of his truck, I loaded them to my stoop.  Once that was done I brought them a few steps in the door.  Then I got them through the house and back near the steps down.  And finally I hauled them down the steps and arranged them.  I think there were 10 buckets.  It doesn't seem like much, even though most weigh in at about 40 pounds, save the two buckets of oats.  Quite a task for today.  Which means I really do need to take a couple of days down after today.  I have limits.  I can negotiate, stall, but there is a price.  I am trying to ease into the prep for my mother's arrival, so I will have some wind when she gets here.  You should have seen the guys face when I told him my heart was pumping at 20%... while I was loading the buckets as well as he was unloading them.  I should have told him, "You should have seen me in my prime".  Heh...

One of the things I did get done, so far, is to call and get the list of stuff my mom needs from the store.  It will be quite a haul, along with my needs.  I am thinking Wednesday or Thursday for the shopping.  It might even take both days considering there are several stores, and larger buys (on the smaller scale).  Soda for her and me, coffee, three gallons of milk, a lot of meat, chicken, several types of flour, paper plates (of several kinds), and the list goes on.  I will do that when I can, as I can.

I still plan on finishing that load of dishes, then soaking another batch.  As well I have a phone call to make, to try to become the retention officer for the KoC.  I have the time, and no issue with talking to people.  I can handle everything from anger to sobbing.  I even have to time to meet with people from time to time, or even help out in small ways.  Yes, that... I see as something I can and would like to do.  I do respect the KoC, even with the little spats and all.  It's going to happen with a diverse group of men, even if we all have good intentions.

I am seriously heartsick at the moment.  I'm going to need extra sleep and food, I believe.  Ah, I also fried chicken for lunch!  And I heated up a can of peas and  carrots, plus had a side of fruits.  See, I'm trying to add the squishy stuff to my meals.  Store-bought canned isn't the best, but it is what I can do for now.

Yep.  Tired, but feeling really good to have the food here and stored rightly.  All good.  Have a great day.

Up and at it, again.

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Today will not be a heavy work day.  I am a bit sore, a bit tired, and just not feeling it.  As I said, I hope to get those dishes tended, then put a (the last?) load of dishes to soak.  A shower this morning sometime, too.  And I will hit the bathroom, calling the manufacturer of the shower head to try to finish the bathroom off as well.  Other than that, feeding my and the girls' faces will be it.  Tomorrow will be a day of rest, as will, if all goes well, the day after.  Then I will try to finish the rest of the kitchen, recondition my spare bedroom, do some shopping, and while grocery shopping also stop at the hardware store to check about and indoor and outdoor window treatment (plastic wrap type) to insulate the spare bedroom's window nice and tight.  In the summer it is, mostly, fine to have some air flow through that stupid wrong thing.  But in the winter, not so much.

If I have anything left, after all of that is tended, assuming I am able to tend to it, I will then begin hitting little spots here and there.  The computer room could use a bit of straightening, as could the living room even after my recent rampage clean there.  My bedroom could use some spit and shine.  Well, anywhere I look there are things to do.  There is no end to what needs to be done, only a limit to what I can do.

I would love to say my mother is the cause of my recent activity.  And, that plays a part.  The truth is, I either function or I don't, and it has little to do with external or internal pressures applied.  Those can help, a bit.  But they are just as likely to make me stumble as not.  No, I am simply doing a bit better for no good reason.  I'll take it.  I will.  I'll run with it, I always do anyway.  It just happens that I lucked into a window of opportunity at a critical time, at least for my psyche.  My mother knows my ways, and was probably expecting nothing from me.  Possibly even not having the dishes done.  Hopefully this will be a nice surprise for her.  I think... she will enjoy my pantry too.  If nothing else it will put her mind a bit at ease concerning me.  Food, and a larder, for the middling to poor, is all the wealth we will ever truly know.  I am getting that, in spades.  She came from poverty, she understands, even if... on the periphery of her modern understandings of stores as larders... she is beginning to understand the limitations of that as her own mobility declines.

Well, on to my day.  Several hours of goofing, a mug of fresh coffee, and... musing.  Good day.

Hmm... I am trying.

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Not a thing I planned to do today was completed.  Two of the three got hit, and pretty hard.  It turns out that those little tasks ended up being a bit more than anticipated.  Not that I was moving at a super pace.  Even if I had been I question the task allotment. 

The cat litter area was restored, and that small area was vacated, swept, the pan that was tipped was re-ordered and put back into action.  But getting to the rest of the kitchen would have required a bit more work.  I wasn't up to it.  I did get the air conditioner out of the window, and mostly back into it's box.  The box doesn't go together very well or easily though.  Plus, I couldn't find the strapping to bind the box!  I did put the slat-shades and curtains back up though.  I did what I could there, for now.  I did not mess with the dishes, though I did check on them.  A little vinegar in the rinse-soak seems to be keeping that under control.

Further, I did clear the boxes out of this (the computer) room and brought the (empty) boxes up from the basement food storage area.  I cooked two meals, and all but the (pretty much clean, just recently used) cast iron pan have been cleaned.  Yes, the pot I used to make mac and cheese is clean and stored already.  I also got the trash and recycling to the bins and took the trash bin to the curb for tomorrow.  A few other odds and ends also happened, though nothing large or complicated.  Yes, I chose a bit too much to do for today I do believe.

It is all coming together nicely.  With slightly less than a week and a half to go, I think the timing couldn't be better, either.  I do need to call my mother for that shopping list though.  I need milk, coffee, her kind of soda, and a few other things anyway.  So it would be good to have her list before I go.  Two trips in such a short time before her visit, while also trying to get a handle on things for her visit, is just a bit much. 

And, actually, yes, I am satisfied.  My progress is fine, my efforts are fruitful mostly.  I have a plan and two simple goals, if it ends up that more is being done than what my primary goals are.  Tomorrow I will refocus just to the ends of finishing every last stinking dish and cleaning the bathroom top to bottom.  I would also like to call the manufacturer of that terrible showerhead and ask them a few questions.  It would be nice to have that operational, and not just for her stay.  The idea of it is great.  Oh, I also tinkered with the kitchen sink faucet.  While it began working better, it was still even slower than it's usual.  So... I took a studied approach.  I got my rubber mallet out and whacked it a few times.  Worked like a charm.  It's still not fast, but it does work a bit better.

Tuesday or Wednesday I hope to be in to the stores, grocery shopping.  A few more smaller paper plates, the food items I need, my mom's want list...  I would like to visit with my friend but I am simply... pushing to get done what I am getting done.  I am hoping to have him over for a dinner when my mother arrives.  At least there would be that.

Yeah, well, I am tired now.  Good night.  Sleep well.

A bit more to do today.

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Actually, there is a ton more to do.  Today will only see two things, for sure, done.  I am a bit stiff and sore, though not because of cleaning.  The other day, after a long day up and little sleep the "night" before, I went in to sit in my chair.  When I am very tired I have a way of just dropping into my chair.  As I did so, I realized something was very wrong.  Sam was under me!  If I hadn't used everything from legs and arms to stop me, and right in that extremely short window of time between realizing she was under there and fully seating, I am pretty sure I would have killed or seriously hurt Sam.  (Oh Lord, that would have killed me.)  Using every muscle and all my will, in a micro-second, I halted my fall.  But I used, and tore, muscles I haven't used in a decade or simply didn't know I had or that could be hurt.  Muscles from between my ribs seemingly to of course my inner thighs burned like fire, but only for a few minutes.  I am surprised I didn't do some real damage.  Then all the pain was gone, until after my home cleaning workout yesterday.  Now it's all back, but in a much more muted manner.  Still, doesn't confront me none.  I can still work.  The thing is, I don't want to rush it and cause some other problems.

The air conditioner needs to go.  As well, the girls, while playing, fighting, or a bit of both, for the first time since I met them, knocked over one of the litter boxes.  They did that yesterday but I was too busy to muss with it.  So, that will be done today.  I will, technically, do one more thing... sweep the kitchen.  I would be sweeping part of it anyway, to sort out the litter pan debacle of '12.  But much like vacuuming, it seems a waste not to do the whole of the area while you are at it.  Oh, and I will finish off those dishes that have been sweetening in vinegar water.  I had almost forgotten those.  So... that is all I have planned for today.  Then again, there is always more to almost any job than just the stated.  Dishes, once set, must be dried, then put away.  The kitchen will have to be sorted a bit in order to sweep.  And the air conditioner will have to be bound in it's box, strapped, then stored somewhere.  Still, I might be able to get to more, but as I said, this will be enough, for today.

Absolutely wunderbar!  Yeah, I am getting to things.  I might have the kitchen done, the bathroom sorted, and my mothers bed freshened and put back together, linens-wise.  Oh, and a bit of shopping done too.  I hate having to do a big grocery shopping trip when she is here.  Hmm, I need to get on her though, she promised a list of ingredients she wanted me to have on hand.  I have some of it, but...  Doing my part, folks, for my part anyway.

Good day.  Oh, and remember to be thankful to God.  Complain as you like, if you have the voice to complain, you have the life to lead and the wherewithal to be unhappy about some things.  Many do not.

Wow. Woot!

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I knew I had the tele-tech coming in this morning between 8:00 and 9:00 but I couldn't get to sleep until a half past midnight.  I did set my alarm for 6:00, in the dim hope that I might be able to clean up a bit around the area he would be working.  The dust on the components was thick enough to use as a blanket and the floor of that area, where I have mostly been "living" for the last six months or more, was littered with... well... the debris of living!  Gnarly, rough, not good, and some other things. 

I woke at 4:00, not sure I really wanted to get up but...  And I kicked around, drank a bit of coffee, and goofed until 5:30.  I fed the girls, let Sam out, then goofed until 6:00.  I wasn't sure anything was going to get done.  It was then that I decided I should at least take a shower.  A shower I thought?  But... the dishes are in there.  Well, that one trailing load.  So... I did those dishes.  I washed, rinsed, dried, and put them up.  And of course I cleaned out and dried off the bin I am using as a dishpan.  THEN I took a shower.  Okay.

But I wasn't done.  I got into the living room, started tearing into the area.  Where to start though?  Hmm, the folding diner tablettes.  They had lots of stuff on them, and needed cleared and cleaned.  So I did that.  I set them aside.  Then I grabbed the tv cleaner disposable cloths and cleaned off the television screen, the rest of the tv, then on to dusting the stand, blue-ray player, PS 3, and the general area.  Finally I tore everything that was just lying around out.  Most of it was simply trash or trash worthy at this point.  Into the (rectangular albeit) circular file that all went.  Moving my chair, I decided to sweep the carpet before trying to vacuum.  I did that, then vacuumed.  But... like they say with Pringles or whatever, one chip won't do, so I pretty much vacuumed all of the living room I could get too.  Remember, I was on a timer so I had to try to stay focused. The area almost looks livable again!

Then I had to sit.  I goofed until he arrived.  While he was here, to avoid being a hoverer for the whole time, I went and finished off the dishes in the sink (they are rinsing, I added a little bit of vinegar to the rinse, for surety).  Oh, and before I took my shower and after the dishes were done, I cleaned the toilet bowl and gave the rest of it a first hit.  Lime-Away is fantastic, for me, here.  After he was here and gone, with much done, I decided a more proper meal was in order, so I made tuna mac and cheese from as much scratch as is possible this far from the sea.

That on top of other works that have been happening.  Yeah, I might get some things going by the time my mother is here.  The other night, when I thought I would just be going to bed, I ended up hungry.  And with meats thawed, but the stove and my cast iron pan in deplorable conditions, I got to work.  I cleaned the stove quite well, and twice, perhaps thrice, right down to the sparkle.  I cleaned the iron too, making it food ready again.

Bit by bit, sometimes in leaps and bounds, sometimes one solitary lonely job at a time.  Progress is going forward.   Life is good!

Good day.

Not much, not far, not fast.

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It is definitely movement, and work goes on.  One load of pots and pans and a roaster down, one more soaking, and dishes were given a fresh soak.  Why do I hate dishes so much?  Well, it isn't necessarily the dishes, it is the clutter around the dishes... well and the clutter of the dirty dishes too.  When I finish with the pots and pans I may just start doing regular dishes in there.  I just feel a lot less claustrophobic doing dishes in the dishpan in the bathtub.  Sinks are so small!

I have done a few odd other assorted things as well.  Nothing fancy, nothing big, just... somethings.  It does add up.  And, as I said, when these dishes are washed and away I will be going to disposable only... as much as I can tolerate that.  I love solid silverware and good plates.  I just can't keep on top of them.  I will keep to my glass drinkware, but the rest is... history.

Tired.  Good and tired.  I didn't let the headache slow me down, if that didn't help me much either.  Still, I'll do what I can, whatever the case.  I know there will be days where nothing will get done, as usual.  I don't even begrudge that too much anymore... just the facts of life.  Well, okay, I begrudge the hell out of it, I just don't beat myself up over it.

It's bedtime, and at a right proper time... 20:47 or some such.  I won't be setting the alarm, just waking when I wake.  Then a few hours of goofing, then back into a rotation of wash, wash, rinse, repeat as necessary... tending to the girl's, and my own, hunger as needed.  I will sleep well, I hope you do likewise.  Good night.

Oh, really? Why, yes. Yes indeed.

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I have been slowly returning to life.  Oh, nothing fancy, and it started with a few dishes one day, cat litter the next, along with the help from the neighbor.  I think he and his son's help... broke something open.  Or at least helped quite a bit.  It can be so difficult to see chores, tasks, jobs, wants, and such and be able to do nothing but sit.  So it is always a wonderful thing to be able to begin tearing in even at what is still, and probably will remain, a snail's pace.  But at a snail's pace at least some things will be done.

Yesterday I called Emergency Essentials.  I believed they had shorted me two cans of seed I had ordered.  They promised to resend those.  The woman on the line questioned my thoughts, so I promised I would recheck the supplies.  She put the order in and suggested that if I find them, just call and cancel.  I did recheck, too.  I try to be a man of my word.  No seed, so I needed do nothing more.  Then I asked about the year supply of grain and legumes...  That was backordered it seems.  It had just arrived and would be being sent out yesterday or today.  No problem there, I assured her, just so long as the order had indeed been placed (at that very nice price), and that it was all in the pipeline.  I was quite good with waiting a few days, weeks, or month.  So, my grains are on their way!

After that I placed an order for cable television.  Tomorrow, it seems.  And I was able to tag the third tier for the price of the second tier, without a contract.  I just want to make sure my mother has enough to watch, the local channels would not have made her very happy.  Only a few major cable channels would also have been a bit dry.  While I really would like to have the Catholic channel, I just don't like television.  Well, there is the cooking channel too.  But, like, I have been doing any of that.  Hmm...  Anyway, that will probably be quit at the end of her stay.  Probably.  There was another call yesterday, but I can't remember what that was. 

Today, I woke up hard.  I felt like someone had done a blackjack number on my skull.  One dose of aspirin, and another to come, and I seem to be doing a bit better.  I fed the girls and degaussed their litter pan first thing.  Then goofed a goodly bit.  But getting the coffee pot clean, and coffee grinder refreshed, has been on my mind.  So, I broke the grinder down and soaked it in vinegar.  I then set the coffee pot to run through several doses of vinegar, now I need to begin running through several pots of fresh-each-time water.  The coffee grinder together and should be fresh.

Next, more goofing.  A goodly lot.  Goofing equals console games (Skyrim).  After that, I re-soaked the dishes, putting the vinegar-water from the coffee pot in with that load.  It just smells bad even after a wash or two and several fresh soaks.  That might just be the drain?  Anyway...  I was lamenting the big pans I have to wash in the little sink.  Then I remembered something!  I bought that big tub in order to wash the big stuff, without completely gunking-up the bathtub.  So, I emptied the bin out, put some soap in the bottom, and took it into the tub and began filling it and loading it with the bigger things.  The roaster, the 20 quart pot, several 3-5 quart pans... you get the picture... the things that standard sinks just don't fit correctly.  So, washing the dishes should be completed in a day or two.

Yes, things are moving forward.  Life is coming back to my bones, muscle, skin, brain...  It isn't fear.  It is more... excitement?  Looking forward to having some company?  Having a goal?  I dunno.  It's not just one thing.  This sort of thing works once in a while, and allows me to do much more for a short time (potentially), but it doesn't last and in real terms it is lackluster.  You can only say it is wonderful if you know me well enough to see it.

I need to thaw some meat.  With dishes going forward, I should have a pot to cook in and a bowl to put leftovers.  Nothing fancy, perhaps mac and tuna cheese, but the actual kind, not that insta-crap.  Or... something else.  Meat!  I need meat too!  I suspect I should thaw several bits of meat.  Anyway... it is moving along, slowly albeit.

Good day.

Trying to shove it into gear.

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I didn't finish the dishes, yet.  Washed twice though, they just need one more time for me to feel right about them.  If I hadn't mentioned, the hydrant has been filled around.  I was quite pleased about that.  The lawn got torn up a bit, but that is a far lesser problem, and one I CAN solve next spring.  A little seed, a rake, and a week or two of tinkering will be a project I might enjoy.  I am, however, going forward with a few other arrangements.

I will be calling today to make sure my mother has television from day one.  She is as plugged into tv as I am to the net, or gaming.  Yeah, we are an owned people, true enough.  The people who bring me food offered to continue doing so.  My mother, however, would have none of it.  She was grateful for the offer, but cooking is not an issue for her, it's something she truly enjoys.  As well, she had me look up the distance to a cousin's home.  He lives in the redoubt, deeply.  Fishes and hunts, too, go figure.  My mother would like our 'vacation' time to be a visit with them.  I suspect that can be arranged, even with gas prices and the distance.  But the travel and stay will take four days.  Not a problem.  We may need time off by then, perhaps putting the visit right in the middle of my mother's stay.  If my cousin and his wife are amenable to the proposal anyway.

I have been keeping the girls fed, but keeping up on the litter box fell a bit behind.  I was only doing that a few times a week, three at least.  But the crystal litter has held up quite well.  When I went back to get the same stuff though, the store either no longer carries it or they were out.  Several stores actually, simply didn't have it.  I found a similar type, just different brand.  I hate changing brands right away on a new product trial, but...  Both brands do quite well.  And that first type lasts about three to four weeks.  Even then it wasn't as skunky smelling as regular stuff after only a week, even after I started cleaning it out.  Urine smells simply vanish in this stuff.  Just so you know.  And, pound for pound of useful litter, it is far cheaper, and lighter, than the other stuff.  Yeah, I am plugging for it.

Hmm, to make a call and get the dishes into a fresh soak for a final wash this afternoon.  Then maybe to some laundry.  I dunno.  I want the dishes done and the kitchen spiffy for my mom.  If I have time, after that, I want to make the bathroom particularly nice and perhaps create a space for her stuff, a medicine cabinet just for her in there, I think.  I might have one around.  Anyway...

Good day.

Teh boy is alive, alive I tell ya!

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Okay, I'm not doing wind sprints, benching weights, swimming, or... much.  But I did hit the first load of dishes.  Well, I didn't FINISH them, but that wasn't possible.  After sitting in a soak for a very long time they had to be washed off first before being washed.  And that has gone forward and they are sitting back in a fresh soak, to be completed tonight/this morning.  It killed my legs and lower back, but that is the way of it when the 'machine' has been out of commission for a while.  Cranky, rusted, and such, but I will deal with that.

I have other things I am beginning to plan.  Grocery shopping tops the list.  While I have been doing okay, food-wise, it has not been optimal.  No one died, unlike other less than optimal outcomes, but...  I have been barely keeping in bits of food.  If it weren't for incoming food I would have been in serious trouble though.  Milk, tobacco, caffeine, all being kept at marginal levels.  I am working on keeping more food available that I can simply supplement the real meals on wheels.  I am probably going back to those breakfast bars.  After being off all of that for over a month my diabetes is staying solid at 130-140.  While high, it is better than 200-400, or even well over 600-700.  Plus, those bars are really easy, were helping me lose weight, and just work.  I think my diabetes will do what it does regardless of what I do.

We got our first snow tonight.  It has been raining the last two days, I believe.  It just turned to snow sometime tonight.  It won't stay, most likely.  Being a winter man, I do like seeing that first snow.  I can deal with the cold, it is that heat that gets to me.  I am keeping my home just a bit warmer this year though.  Not really for comfort, more so that if the window of opportunity to get to things or get out arise, I can leap on it.  I would love to get out, after the first snow, and just look at the local world, go up a pass, enjoy the crisp air.  I do love it here.  This is where I like to love and will probably die, someday. 

Yes, back on track perhaps.  We will see.  Good day/night/morning... something.  Whatever it happens to be for you because those things mean nothing to me.

Politics? Bah! Bleh! Meh?

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No, I don't like the choices.  A moderate versus a slightly less moderate.  No, I do like Romney.  He's out of my circles, but... not really.  Just where he has gotten in life, not in who he is.  He is a common man, just a hard worker, who had goals, health, and parlayed his life well.  As a man, fine.  I would give him the shirt off my back in need.  But as a pol?  Nice guys finish last.  Then again, from what I believe I saw between the lines in this election cycle, he isn't... truly nice.  No, not a bogeyman either, just... rather... insistent, persistent, intent, and willing to do what it takes... within true reason from what I can tell.  Still, politically, I am... simply not convinced.  The Bush's burned me on politics quite a bit.

Of course, Zero HAS to go.  And, Romney is the ONLY one that can make him go.  R. Paul, Johnson?  They have zero chances.  And, regardless of what Vox suggests about a vote for Paul being a vote for Zero, the truth is half of that is true.  It IS one less vote for Romney.  Then again, and in truth, I think Romney has it in the bag.  I don't think more Republicans are going to turn out, I think more everybodys are going to turn out, save maybe Dems (though many indies will vote for him, shielded by the ambiguity of being an indy).  I believe Romney will win huge, and the numbers voting will be larger than we have seen... probably ever, and possibly even by ratio for the last several decades (meaning, at one time nearly everyone who could vote, did... that has changed, it is down to... what... 60% of voters?  summit like that).

Something almost kicked over today.

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I wasn't able to capture it, but for about an hour this morning I almost felt alive!  It doesn't seem like much.  Contrasted with not being able to sit or lie comfortably, while in a gray fog, for the last hundred and eleventy days it... was a kindness.  Perhaps I am trying to pick up a bit before my mother arrives.  An old dog, trying to wag his tail for his old master?  Dunno.

Then, the fellow that brings me meals saw that... the house was a bit ragged.  So... he and son scoop in, vacuum trash and recyclables into a dozenty bags, hauls it all out to the bins, and takes the bins to the street!  That gives me room to breath.  So, I set the dishes to a soak and hope to get to them soon.  I'll keep the soak fresh until I get to the dishes.  A shower wouldn't hurt either.  And some laundry.  Something needs to break.  Mom is coming!

I've been tinkering with the heat.  I keep it 72 all of the time, kicking it up to 76 when my bones hurt from cold, turning it back down when the heat makes me break out in hives, and with my bedroom being an ice cube factory for sleep, it works pretty well.  Not much else has happened, but maybe a few things might get kicked over soon.  Oh, and I am staying right at around 260 pounds.  I quit much of my snacking because it was fueling my diabetes, which I haven't checked in a while.  If it is back under control I need to find a new set of snack foods to add nutrition, which fuels weight loss.  I'll keep tinkering with that until I have a load of quick easy foods that don't bugger my diabetes.  In any case, I think the 'fever' might be breaking.  I might be able to get my feet on the ground and get some things done before my mother arrives.  I do hope, someday, to have a clean home to invite her to visit.  It's possible today, it just wouldn't be MY home.  :p

Good day... evening... fine, it's night... uhrm, morning already?  Never you mind.  But I'm not a gonna go to bed!  Though I hope you sleep/slept well.