Slow, but getting there.

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Dishes are rinsing, I bagged everything several times.  It makes it slicker to just grab the top bag, and whatever is in there, and get it to the trash or recycling, when there are several bags underneath.  Same with waste baskets.  I dished out just enough burger mac and cheese for a lunch, heating that on a paper plate in the micro.  I'm just not moving fast, otherwise.

I am hoping to get the dishes done in an hour or so, take a shower, and head to town.  I am not sure I will make it.  The batteries are running quite low already.  It's not that I worked a lot, though I have put in a decent minor effort.  It's more that my clock is all messed up from over and undersleeping.  I more just ended up being awake at this time of day from all else.  I seem to have switched my time without changing my clock.  Tomorrow might be as early as I can get to town.  I won't plan for anything else, and will push my day today on into early evening.  It's as good as I can do, I believe.

At least I don't need chips, a reader, or some of the other things I was worried about.  I would like to get a rather robust dolly though.  No, not G.I. Barbie... a appliance dolly, one that works on stairs.  I want to clean out the back porch, and need it anyway.  But it will help in doing a job for my friend.  Yeah, I have other things in mind for it, like moving some furnishings and such out of my bedroom.  I had one, but it pretty much crumbled moving straight weights.  It was just for lighter stuff, I guess.  I'm hoping to find one that does those things, plus folds down to a cart.  Might not be possible, but worth searching.  I may get in to town earlier tomorrow, to look for such a device at a couple of places.  I'm looking online, too.  Price comparison.

Yeah, well, back to life.  Later.

Sometimes taking out the trash is more than it seems.

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This trash day was the first, I believe, chance to get rid of the boxes and old rug removed during house cleaning.  Between then and now I simply had too much trash, and no recycling day.  I had forgotten.  When I put the trash and recycling bags in the bins, and headed to the curb, I noticed the pile that was supposed to go.  I wasn't really feeling up to it.  Still, a deal is a deal.  More, I did not want this pile getting buried under snow, rotting until spring, and then dealing with it then.  When snow will come, and stay, is anyone's guess.  Overdue, if you ask me.  So... I had to pull bags out, squish and push this and that.  The rug was a bear to work with.  While we haven't gotten snow to stay, we have gotten snow and rain.  I would guess this thing is seven by twelve.  Dry it's a bit of a bugger, wet it's a bear, to manage.  Still, after this and that, I got rid of the rug, then broke, bent, and stuffed the boxes into recycling.  Done.  Yeah, I went around the cave, picking up anything that needed to go, emptying the waste baskets here and there, so it's a straight job.  Damn I'm doing good.

A bit of a break after that.  The dishes should be ready for a final wash shortly.  While these dishes and pots weren't left for long, they still needed a soak.  Cheese, burger, mac is messy.  It sticks to pots, it sticks to silverware, it's messy.  I have everything down, pretty much, to a shine though.  I just like that final wash, to be sure, and to get the last bits of grease out.  After that, a shower.  While showering, I will make sure the tub gets cleaned from after the dishes.  The tub is really looking good.  I had thought the porcelain had been scratched down to the iron.  Seems not to be the case, and all the porcelain is quite nice... if not quite perfect yet.  Good enough for a dame to take a hot soak and be relatively happy with it.  But not quite to spick and sparkle.  Might not be possible, it's older and the place is dusty.

Yeah, a couple of shows, perhaps the final wash and setting up a rinse, a couple more shows, then drying and putting dishes away.  Another show and a shower.  And, finally, a trip to town.  Later today, when I get back... or tomorrow... I'll deal with all the new boxes that have arrived.  Some need to be saved, some will be set aside for a specific group of items that may need to be sent, but some may just go away.  I'm liking keeping up, as good as I can.  Some days, though, you will lose.  I will.  I can only do so much.  Later.

Extra sleep.

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After waking last night, and writing about the dream with supper on the way, I realized I needed more sleep.  I had cut sleep shy yesterday, to wake.  Then I slept long after, to catch up.

I was hoping to be awake in time to get trash and recycling out, then to the curb.  I think that will get done.  I set the alarm for 6:00, just in case, but woke right at about 4:00.  I've reset dishes from yesterday, washing as I went.  I cleaned the stove, and cooking counters, off yesterday.  Then set up dishes.  Doing that right before my first bedtime, I really didn't have a chance to finish them.  Lunch was just before that, so I honestly didn't have time for a one day cook to clean shot.  I was still too tired when I woke to mess with it, as proof I went pretty much right back to bed.  After I get the trash and recycling handled, though, I believe I will give the dishes a final wash, set them to soak, and probably have them dried and put up by noon.  And a shower after that.  Hmm, if I have enough energy, I might even strop the razor and give that a go. 

I rinsed off the face with the trimmer recently.  The razor shaving isn't going as fast or well as I had hoped.  No gaping bloody wounds, but it's not as good as could be hoped.  I have everything but the cloth strop, for honing further with the high grit razor lapping compound.  I'm not sure when that will be in.  I suppose I will need to check the post box for that more often, along with my whatever my mother sent.  All good.  Still, with the whiskers all shorter, perhaps easier to cut, I would live to give the straight razor, as is, a bit more practice.  Yeah, crazy, I suppose.  But it's a hobby that, eventually, will pay.  In time I may collect old razors and fix as needed, then hone, and just have as a collection... or for barter and training.  I see now why men often went bearded before the advent of modern razors or easy affordable access to barbers.  Though even those are rather rough.  I am honestly hoping, with some skill, that this sort of shaving will be better on the skin.  No telling, I suppose, until I get good.  Practice makes as perfect as possible.

Other than those things, I do need to get to town earlier this afternoon.  My friend needs a favor, so...  I meant to have that done Friday, I think, but it didn't work out.  Then Sunday, but that didn't work out.  So today it is.  One way or the other, I will get in and take care.  I may sniff around a few computer shops, seeing if any of the hobbyists have heard much about the various security programs and suites.  Stay away from the minimalists.  I've looked there.  Going cheap, or to the smallest footprint, is for those who are, essentially, cheap or stylistically inclined.  Much as with writing in such a way, few are really good at it.  I am not among them.  Most noobs, even, especially I should so, if they think five years is a long time, have no clue.  Mostly.  Just notes and considerations will be taken, no purchases... save perhaps a larger thumb drive.  I used both I purchased for repair and settings images.  So, a couple more, for now, to transfer any photos, once edited, for posting.  That'll work for now.

Later.

Such dreams.

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I saw parts of my life.  I saw through my eyes, and the eyes of others, from the past.  I do, and have always, considered myself an ugly man.  Half giant, half man, all ugly.  I never did understand how I was able to be with many of the women I was with.  I didn't rate, as I accounted things.  Frankenstein type ugly.  It's how I see things, only worse as I grew older, gained weight.  Yes, between sixty and maybe eighty lovers, some of them the type men kill, and die, for.  I was never really into that killing and dying for a woman thing.  She either worked, and was available, or not.  If I do easily know the difference.

Hmm, little surprises.

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After setting aside reviews for security software, I turned my attention to installing photoshop.  At least that went simply enough.  Yes, it wants me to join something.  Initially, it seems, all programs offer something free.  Then they ask for your wallet.  Always.  No thanks.  Further, not being connected to the internet, or a way for the device to connect otherwise, no dice.  I wonder how much junk will wake up as soon as I do connect the device?  Lots, probably.  You would think we were tourists in the poorest African nation, eating a ham sandwich, with all the hands out when a new machine connects to the internet.  Half of those hands, even if offered a few dollars, would be stealing whatever else they could get their hands on while being funded.

Still, that went on easily enough.  After that, I couldn't stop thinking about the fact that there is a card reader indicated by the hardware setup.  So I went looking.  What I had thought was a minor vent, after closer inspection, appeared to be a card reader.  Even closer inspection showed there to be two letters, on the underside of the case... sd.  So... I tried it.  Look, machines don't come with manuals, at all, anymore.  They don't come with anything but a cord and the machine.  I tried the sd slot and it worked.  So... I can now take raw files and shift them to the machine.  I will have to figure out photoshop.  Actually, I have two pictures, and moved them over.  Photoshop, or the one I have, isn't very good at touching up RAW files though.  The pictures are too dark.  While P.S.'s RAW lab does brighten them a bit, I can't get much more out of it.  I don't know how it saves, so I don't want to mess with saving adjustments.  I was hoping for more.  RAW files hold serious data.  This lab just doesn't offer much in adjusting that data.  Then again, I just started tinkering.

I found a way to download a free copy of P.S.'s manual.  But I doubt if that will be worth a crap.  Manuals were written to give union employees work, not to inform the public.  Often they aren't even accurate, on top of being written by technical writers for reasons other than being informative.  It's a 9:00 to 5:00 job that satisfies some union rules for number of hires, hires not intended for the best and the brightest.  The companies don't care, the employees don't care.  Bleh.  Still, it might have something useful in it.  YouTube has become lame lately.  Between seeming trying to end music access, pushing politically correct topics, trying to force multicultural crap, and not showing good posts with their search engine... almost trying not to show what was sought more like, I haven't been able to find much of any use on their site... for a long time.  Working with them has become closer to pulling teeth than the breeze it has been.

Never mind, I'll figure the program out, or find one that works.  Grumpy, a bit, dealing with stupid tech, unions, political correctness, and the rest of it.  But... I'm not alone.  A lot of people are camping it out, looking for solutions.  Corps and .gov can only do so much.  The damn is not just about to break, it is broken.  It just hasn't spilled through yet.

Not bad, really.  Even with the weight of a dozen apes on my back, I have gotten the systems working, and as good as is possible so far.  I think, for a while, I will go back to researching security for the laptop.  This old os X machine is pretty much done.  There isn't much to do to save it.  Old tech, with MS working to undermine it as much as possible to force people to a newer os.  But the hardware, itself, is probably nearing the end of the line as well.  Now to just figure out the new junk.  Hey, if that were a car, it would be called a classic... in car years.  First, though, I think I will see if P.S. has better ways of working with RAW files, or if that really is it, and how it saves... or how to change how it saves.

It's must be getting colder, or my fridge is set wrong or misbehaving.  It's freezing meat when I thaw it and put it in there.  Hmm... could tinker with it's thermostat I suppose.  I am hungry.  Waiting on the meat to thaw.  I wonder if I turned the thermostat down this summer, in my illness, and forgot.  With extremes in temp, and an older refrigerator, that may just be required.  Hungry, dang it.  Perhaps the meat is rethawed.  Later.

Yeah, well.

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I've been looking over internet and anti-virus programs all night.  Most of it looks fail.  There is better and worse fail, but honestly, none of it is truly outstanding.  Free stuff is worth every dime, cheap stuff even less.  But paying more doesn't seem to help much.  Basically, it looks like hackers are seriously on top at this point.  Then again, they probably pay better than paying users.  Truth is, if you have a computer, someone else is using it.  Smart phone, tablet, doesn't matter.  If it connects through wi-fi, potentially bluetooth if there is something nearby that can control it that has access to wi-fi, your device is pwned.  It just comes down to who else is using it.  Better and newer means only .govs and .corps, unless they rent the use to others.  I have security on this machine, but I don't honestly care for it.  It, like the rest probably, works right up until it doesn't.  I can never quite tell if it's doing anything.  It doesn't tell me what it does to what it finds.  And, often, I get repeat problems that it just doesn't seem to do anything with.  currently, it is blocking something like amazonawd, or such, from internet access.  The last time I checked, it had refused access 90 times in an hour or three.  No option to fix or change anything, for me.  It just says it blocked access.  Hmm, haven't seen it messing around lately.  Either it succeeded or stopped, but viruses don't stop, so...

I will probably set security suites and software reviews aside.  I'm not getting anywhere with it anyway.  I'll just install photoshop and see where I can go from there.  If I happen to get that up and going, I'll then mess with some things, and figure out how to transfer a couple of pictures over, after taking them and figuring out how to transfer them.  My machine says it has a card reader.  I'll look again, perhaps it's some sort of internal card though.

Yes, I sprayed the bathtub for one more cleaning.  It may be about as good as it is going to get.  I'll mess around in there, then figure out what to eat.  Mac and cheese sounds good, maybe with tuna.  I don't think I have marinara sauce, or spaghetti type sauces.  Yeah, they are a bit different, somehow.  I use them interchangeably, for the most part.  More shows, as I think about installing photoshop.  Too many electronic things to mess with at once.  It'll get done, eventually.  Later.

Messing with the new laptop.

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First thing was just trying to get the thing to sort of work.  First thing I had to do was remove Norton.  Beside being a poor performer, it was trying to get me to pay.  Don't come to me with your hand out and a bad report card.  Especially don't try to jack the operation of my device while doing so.  Expunged.  Now to figure out how to get Window 8.1 itself to behave.  It's a lousy system, made so that only they can jack it.  Not hooked to the internet?  No problem, they will just screw with you on autopilot.  At least 8.1 has a window setup, if it keeps opening various controls as if I had moused over the corners.  It's a monster, whole, and ugly.  I call it the ObamaWindows.  I honestly thing the two are connected.

Next I need to find what else can be expunged from the system.  Bloatware, like bureaucracy, unchecked, has to be sorted out.  Seamless operation means control.  Between .gov and .corp, they aren't, none of them, on your side.  Anything they offer for free will cost you, one way or the other.  There are enough stupid people, ignorant people, and lazy people, that they get away with it most of the time.  And if you don't care, they don't care, as they ware selling your data or otherwise walking to the bank with money they stole, or made from stealing, or otherwise harming, you.  When the two work together, you get what you get. 

For my part, while I can't fix it all, I can give it a good shot.  The number of programs on this thing that aren't needed, or wanted, isn't too bad.  I dumped a bunch of games, so far, and am looking to get rid of ebay and amazon connections.  But those seem to be in a program, that for the moment, I see as useful.  Which means I either have to find an alternative, go without the utility, or figure out how to remove that junk from within the program.  After ridding bloatware, I will move on to figuring out access.  I won't be using kindle, for example.  Some things have to be allowed access through the firewall.  It's more a matter of figuring out which ones are needed for basic operation and which ones aren't needed or wanted, or are a threat all by themselves.  No, toshiba is not on my side.  Money, money, money.

The thing is, you can't trust much internet available advice.  They'll sure tell you how to open your machine up to hacks.  Yeah, it might perform better, until they own it.  Damned things are monsters.  There are few places were advice isn't ruled by hackers, .gov, or .corp.  That's just the way it is these days.  I, generally, don't download executables.  I generally go to websites I know.  Doesn't matter.  They are even learning to hack through photos.  Viewing the photo is executing it.  And just going to some internet sites is enough.  Java scripts, I guess.  To be honest, even the pros don't know anymore.  If they ever did.  Nasty business.

I don't have much worth stealing, but that isn't the point.  Not all of it.  I'm still deciding what to do about security.  But first I have to tame windows itself.  The damned os just does what it wants.  I have to figure out how to turn of charms, or whatever, but know how to get to them if I do so.  Bleh...  Lots of work before I even begin trying to install photoshop.  I sure dug a hole this time.  I am feeling just a bit overloaded.  I'll... get to it.

Got to love a good sleep.

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I've been pushing.  No doubts.  If not longer hours, fuller days at least.  And I do think I have been pushing awake time, if I had to guess... which I do because I can't track that.  I'm my own boss, so I can do that.  Sleep has been delicious for two reasons.  First, I am healthy enough that sleep actually does some good.  I wake slightly refreshed.  With that first in mind, I can push my days and work loads.  I'm trying not to go over that invisible line into utter exhaustion.  I remind, I said invisible line.  I won't know, for sure, until I cross it.  And, perhaps, if my condition stays good, I will be able to push that line further along.  I am impressed with what I have been doing.  That line has to have moved.  At some point it will bite me, moving the wrong way, and blasting me off my feet.  No problem, as long as I can make that temporary. 

I have been back on medicine, at the lower dose, for almost two weeks now.  Daily, regular, and right.  I will probably go another week, then increase dosage on the life-killer one stop, and see if I can handle that.  That is as high, if it works, as I will go.  I seem to be doing quite well.  It is a compromise, but as much of one as I am willing to make.  Docs will just have to deal.  After this week is up, I will begin taking stats three or four times a week.  I won't do those daily, they just upset me... or bore the daylights out of me... neither to any good purpose.

Now to figure out the machine, software, operating system, and mechanical connections and transfers.  I will need to purchase an external card reader, and figure out a non-wi-fi connection to the internet.  I thought about using the laptop just for pictures, but my current OS is pretty much dead.  Infected and the securityware, as usual, is bogus.  Doesn't remove, or fix, anything.  It might be containing it, or not.  Like I could tell.  When you openly court hatred from the left, just by your nature, you should expect .gov and brownshirt electronic attacks.  These people are pussies, and wouldn't consider open violence.  They use .gov for that.  Which is why they support, and create problems with, .gov.  It seems like an illogical move unless you realize their top down, bottom up mantra, squeezing everyone else between an increasingly tyrannical government, which they help create through their behavior.

Well... first a bit of waking.  I just brewed fresh coffee.  It's a treat.  Cold, hot, new, or old, it all goes down.  But fresh coffee is the bestest!  That, a little music, I've already hunted, and been hunted, by the girls.  Hmm, I might spray the tub again, and let that soak while I wake.  Another episode or two of the show, then on to the new machine and software.  Gosh, it's almost like I have a plan, one that is halfway holding together.  Later.

I wanted to sleep.

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At midnight, actually, sleep sounded good.  First, though, I wanted to clear the table.  I often left stuff on the table after shopping or visiting the post office, or around wherever they landed.  It wasn't laziness, I simply had no remaining battery charge.  Not this time, anyway.  Everything to put up, set where it was to go, a new spray bottle was filled with windex and actually used on a couple of glass and mirror objects, the easy to get ones so far.  I put the thumb drives in the case I purchased for them, and that was set near the laptop.  Everything was put away.  Then I went through my mail.  My remote control for the camera was in, and a very nice gift from my brother.  My mom suggests something will be coming in from her, so I'll check every few days.  Probably.

Okay, but I still wanted to go to sleep.  Hmm, but first I used some of the new cleaner on the tub, then that extending handled scrubber.  I like that.  Actually, I sprayed the tub and let that soak a bit, while watching another episode of Supernatural.  While I was doing that, I activated the remote in the camera settings, though I didn't try it.  I then put the remote in it's carry case, and put that in the camera bag.  I also unpackaged  the new camera memory, put them in their cases, and stored them in their place in the camera bag.  I need to format those too.  Can't remember everything!  Plus, after the episode, I was in a hurry to mess with the laptop, but had to hit the tub with the brush.  Then I got to the computer, found the instructions for saving various backup data to the thumb drives, and did that.  I was going to begin optimizing the laptop, but the battery was low so I just hooked it up to charge.  I suppose I could work on it further, but the place available for charging isn't convenient for messing with it.

Yes, yes, lots of little things.  Lots and lots of little things.  I have sort of run out of little things... hmmm, other than formatting the camera memory.  That's quick and easy.  Then... to bed, I do believe.

I have a couple of big things to get done in this coming week.  A Christmas card or two, two extended business calls and activities, and more work here in the cave.  I realize, at this point, that keeping up isn't exactly possible.  The better I get the more realistic I see.  I can't keep a home up.  Not alone.  But I can sure plug at it as I can.  I can do better than ever.  But... I just can't do it all, and well.  Too much.  I suppose the deal is to get it as good as you can, and keep it as good as you can for as long as you can, then... prioritize and revisit problem areas.  I'm working on it.

Good night.

Well, lists do grow.

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I was late getting to town.  My friend decided shopping and dinner was all for tonight.  A task he wants to do, he decided, it was too late at night.  First shopping.

He didn't have much on his list.  Initially, he was going in with a small list as well.  I think just whole whipping cream.  I think I have the lad addicted!  That stuff is good.  Don't even listen to the doctors.  I think, even if somehow through the secular indoctrination they still believe they are in it for you, they are being indoctrinated to kill you with bad advice.  Low fat, in many cases, means high sugar.  The first is good for you, the last is bad for you.  Put sugar in your gas tank to see a quicker view of what high doses of sugar does to engines.  Your body, boys and girls, is an engine.  Anyway, he ended up with eggnog, cream, and a pack for his chair.  I may be looking around for something a tad better for his birthday.  Or not.  Depends on what he says about it or if some other need is discussed.  I don't notice haircuts or shaves, but I do listen for little actual needs.  That's how man friends do things. 

My list was small.  A couple of thumb drives, milk, and perhaps a couple of other things.  Cleaners?  Yeah.  Well, I got all that.  I bought enough Rid-X for six months, in a form that is safe from bugs (they eat the Rid-X in cardboard box, and the boxes too... weird... unless that is how it treats septic tanks, by getting bugs to do the, urhm, dirty work?).  Plastic seal wrapped doses, in water-dissolving packets.  Then I went a bit crazy in the cleaner aisle.  This and that and those...  I still have a bit of work to do on the tub, but it is very close.  I got an extending handle scrubby, so I can do just bits while I am taking a shower.  Might work for a back scratcher too!  :)  Then, while heading to the thumb drives I remembered kleenex, and then cat treats.  Finally, at the thumb drive area, I found the highspeed chips I was going to buy, for the camera, next month.  They were half the price I was set to pay.  Two of them, the last two in stock, and on a literal 1/2 sale.  So, yeah.  Thankfully I checked out in the electronics section, so wasn't interested in messing around at the front checkout, or keeping things straight between bought and unbought, or who knows what else might have ended up being purchased.

Then dinner.  Nothing fancy.  At that hour, McDonalds was all that was open, I believe.  All good.  But the meal filled me past the comfort zone.  Something I have noticed, when eating twice a day?  I have to cut back.  I simply can't eat very much at a time now.  My old order habits will have to change.  No doubles, but singles.  Not large, but medium.  That meal exhausted me, so that the drive home was a weary one.  I hate that sort of driving.

Well, now with the thumb drives, I can set up the laptop, then set up photoshop... then possibly make another system "picture", or such.  It would give me two layers to fall back.  Beside photoshop, I'll probably put a couple of other adds on, like Pale Moon, and adjust settings a bit, and some software security or two, before making the last system picture.  Two levels of back up, one to initial loaded and setup, the other back to, essentially, factory.  No, these systems can't be trusted.  This isn't even a guarantee.  It's just as good as I can do.

I don't know if that will happen tonight.  That meal, and the much shortened sleep period, are really doing a number on me.  I may just watch a few episodes then hit the sack.  Good night, either way, though.  I doubt if I'll make it back to the machine. 

Weird life lately.

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No, it's great.  I seem pushed, but don't have the sense of being pushed.  Little things are improving.  The care of my home, little cleaning projects, keeping up on dishes.  My schedule is slanting all over the place as I get carried into groups of projects and pastimes and can't seem to back off and remember bedtime.  Just today, I washed the dishes, so that I could make a meal.  Then I made the meal.  Not a bit dish day, but that is unusual.  What is more?  I washed those dishes, and stored the extra, as soon as lunch was eaten.  Smaller meals makes it easier to get to things right away.  But just the notion of those sets of actions, in real time, on one day, is... good.

My friend asked me to get to town today, so I will.  I'm a bit late, but that isn't too unusual.  I best get going though.  I'll see about a flash drive or two and some groceries.  I had to cut my sleep pretty short to be up to be in even so.  Though running late is pretty common around here.  It always will be, unless my heart is cured outright.  Beside the lack of focus, I think time is somewhat metered off the heart by the mind.  If that isn't the only way a bad heart messes up scheduling.  Well... I best be off.

Still... I'm almost beginning to live a dream.  I'll be picking up some stuff just for bath tubs, and more Lime-Away.  I've almost got the bathtub beat.  Once that is as clean as I can get it, I hope to do a few touchups with other similar sinks.  It's a small thing, it just isn't going to be stopping there.  Eventually I might actually get my home the way I like it, mostly.  It's easier to start from clean that to work up to it.  I just can't believe how many side, small, and main things I am doing a day.  I still need lots of breaks, but I take those then seamlessly get back to other projects, or hit the main project again, or make a meal and clean up, and such.  I have honest never done this good before, since becoming ill.  Very nice.

Bits of this and that.

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I'm messing with the camera again, watched a half dozen episodes of Supernatural, hit the bathtub, earlier, with two more various cleaners.  Oh, and I washed, rinsed, and dried the few dirty dishes before hitting the tub.  The tub is coming along, but dang is that thing soaking up some energy.  Closer and closer to clean, now a frosty soft white.  Mostly it looks like layers of dust.  Once I get it clean, I am hoping keep it clean won't be such a fuss.  After doing the dishes I cooked quinoa while steaming fish.  This time, unlike when I made rice recently, I remembered my new containers and pulled one out to store the extra quinoa. 

I am hoping to get back to the living room before long.  For now I am keeping up on things, so the cave isn't caving back in on me.  I do need to get the syrup spot off the carpet first, well and move and arrange things a bit for an easier time when I finally do get the steam vacuum out.  While I am not there, I do many things each day.  When I used to suggest that I got a shower, and maybe dishes done... or did laundry and made coffee?  Yeah, that wasn't a bit of what I did.  Often, that was all that I got done.  I am literally doing, in days, what I did for months earlier this summer. 

I'm not sure about getting out, not right now.  Learning and configuring this camera is beating me up.  The shows, give or take, aren't eating me.  They are simply diversions while I relax after working or thinking too much.  If I have an addiction at the moment, it is the camera.  Bit by bit, it gets arranged, and understood as much as possible.  There is much to go, but not as much as I had thought.  What I really need to do is to see a full explanation of what the various panels show while, or when getting ready, to shoot.  Where is the iso shown, shutter speed, and the rest.  How is it shown.  Some of it, as shown, makes no sense without knowing what it is supposed to say.  It's probably just like most dslrs out there, but it's just been too long since I used one.  Well, and I had only worked up slightly beyond the beginner stage of use.  I could take decent simple pictures with it, nothing more.

My mother called today.  Her Christmas present is in.  A better winter coat.  It fits precisely, and is pleasing.  I hoped it wasn't too warm, but I think it fits the bill.  Color, style, fit... perfect.  I hope.  If she hated the thing, I don't think she would tell me.  It is just like the one I got, but form fit to a woman, and with a girly color.  Dames love those... weird colors.  I do hope she enjoys it, but more that it keeps her warm.  It's warmer, so far, out here.  But where she is, they are getting hard, deep, brutal, cold.  I haven't even had a real chance to break out my new winter coat this year!  Bleh.  Maybe I missed a cold day, or spell, but I can only go by my experience.  Always nice to hear when a gift arrives.  One less thought, or worry, or whatever.

Well... today?  I'll be staying up as long as I can.  Probably just a bit more tinkering on the camera, another three or four episodes, perhaps the last of the quinoa, with butter, salt, and pepper... I remind you, quinoa has full proteins, like meat.  While it isn't filling in the same way, it isn't as lame as rice or some other vegetarian or grain things.  Just a tad bland, even when sorted with butter and the rest.  Ah!  Not enough fat, or fat natural to it.  Butter helps, but doesn't quite fix the dull.  I am hoping, after a sleep period, to get to town.  It'll be late, but I want to get a flash thumb drive so as to get the laptop going, then get photoshop going. 

It seems, with photography today, you have three choices.  You can become a simple photographer, using jpeg (only option in inexpensive cameras), you can be a fussy photographer and try to get your camera and settings just right even while using RAW format, or you can use RAW and do most of your fussing in post-production.  I would like to split between the last two.  The goal, for me, is to take optimal pictures in RAW, using post-production for when that fails.  Jpeg is fine, but post-production work is extremely limited.  You absolutely have to get pretty close or you won't get a photograph.  Choices, and I have chosen.

Ah, well, right.  On to another cup of coffee, the last few menu items for the menu "page" I am on, a few more episodes, then bedtime.  Not sure I will be back.  Enjoy your day, whatever else. 

Doing too much standing still.

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Not completely still.  I've been hitting the bathtub with everything but bombs.  Vinegar, first, which removed little.  Then Lime-Away, which removed more but certainly not all.  Finally I hit it with Pinesol, or such.  Letting each soak in for various amounts of times, then using both a nylon scrub brush and a sponge with nylon scrubbing backing.  It's better, not not pearly, or even fully clean.  I will wait until I take a shower, or two, before going to ammonia.  Mixing and matching that stuff just isn't good.  Ammonia, itself, is not perfectly safe, even cut.  I may just have to work on it over time.  But I did get a vast majority of the stains off the toilet.  I will swab and rinse that, with just soapy water then clean water, to get the chemicals off, before hitting that with ammonia.  The whole process will probably take a week to get to the use of ammonia, as I have other projects, and I want more than just rinsing, but time, to weaken any other chemical traces.  If that doesn't work, another week of clearing, then I try bleach.  Caution, boys and girls, when working with nasty chemicals.

I thought I was doing nothing.  With the slow progress in the bathroom and little else seemingly going forward.  As I review, however, I realize I am doing much more.  One of the big eaters of time has been tinkering with the new camera.  Between simply deciding which modes to use, reading the setup guides or watching them on YouTube, and just fiddling with the thing and components, it is eating a lot more time than I thought.  Further, I am having to learn so many terms just in photography.  Yeah, yeah, iso, cool.  But shutter speed, beyond the simple meaning and on into understanding function, aperture settings (and modes, and types), various focus routines... I still haven't gotten to setting the focus as I would like it.  Some of it is set up, now.  A few more menu screens to work through.

I finally realized that just watching some guy or gal fiddle with their camera in a video was not going to get me there.  I would have to read, do a basic setup, then tinker from there.  I think, once I have a better handle on where various controls are, then I can use the videos to fine-tune, check, and consider my settings.  This is eating bogus amounts of time, time I don't realize is flying by.  Further, I still need to create and save a reset image for the laptop, in case it fails.  Then install photoshop.  And finally, learn how to transfer images, and then use photoshop.  It is much more than I first considered.  Oh... and whether to copyright photos or not.  For now, I suppose, orphans are fine, for general matters.

Oh, and, I have been reviewing Supernatural.  I have the first eight seasons on bluray, and have been tumbling through those.  I have been keeping up on food, too.  So, yes, busy.  But most of it is busy on my butt, so it doesn't seem, to me, like I am doing anything.  I am probably running longer days, as to activity.  I am not sure if I am staying up more or less, but I am exhausted at the end of each "day".  That is messing me up just a bit.  Still... since I have nothing on the calendar for the moment, I suppose that is all good.  Eventually I will find a pace that is more suitable to a schedule.  If nothing else, I will simply burn out, lay down, and sleep for a few days.  Bleh.  I'll keep at things as I can.  Later.  Actually, probably good night-day.  Yeah... I pushed it, or did I fall short?  Gah!

Busy morning already.

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I wanted to cook breakfast, but thought I could do double duty.  Ended up being triple duty.  I have been reviewing information about how to remove stains from porcelain.  The mildest was first.  Vinegar.  I let that soak while thinking about breakfast.  I wanted to mildly season my cast pan and placket, so I started that process too.  After the vinegar had soaked, I rinsed it.  No luck on the base of the toilet, but it cleaned the bathtub a bit.  One layer of stuff anyway.  Next I've put Lime-Away on the stain.  I'll check that in a bit.  If that doesn't work, I'll try ammonia, cut to some percent if I think 10 to 1 is a bit steep as was recommended, more like 3 to 5 water to ammonia.  If those don't work, I'm not quite sure where to go.

I did get my cast back up to speed.  The skillet didn't really need it, but it's how I clean it anyway.  Peanut oil, lard, whatever.  The fat doesn't even have to be fresh, though it smells better if it is.  Heating, slowly, first a lower medium, than a lower high, then I let them cool.  I then scrape them, and redo as necessary.  Three different heat cycles, as I saw things, this time.  Then on to breakfast.  Eggs, ham, and potato crisps.  Nice.  I'll clean the pans out, again, shortly.  I use these often enough that I don't need to salt them.  I ought to work on my dutch oven though, and salt that and put it up.  Some other morning, when I have the right conditions.

I'll be tinkering on the bathroom throughout the day.  I'd like to get those spic and span.  It just feels better.  If I can remove the stain from the toilet base, keeping the bathroom clean, to my expectations, will be easier.  It just bugs me, having a stain.  Getting the bathtub cleaned will also be good for the mind.  It's just... something I like.  And, doing better as I am, I have time for it, and energy.  Heck, I'm working at a time of my day were usually I am just spending hours waking up.  Yeah, I like it.

It looks like I have a problem spot in the living room I had forgotten.  It has to be tended first.  I spilled maple syrup, and it has dried in.  I researched how to clean that, and think I can do it without too much trouble.  It's mostly just moistening the spot, but with care so as not to flood the carpet and backing, then, over a day, rubbing, scrubbing, and rinsing.  I figure I can prep the rest of the room for the steam vacuuming, while treating the spot, then have it ready to go tomorrow.  The steam vac will pick up any extra moisture that might have accumulated as well.  Sort of a back up plan to cover the corners. 

I just need a bit of time to digest breakfast.  I ate a bit too much.  Next time, just two eggs and two potato patties.  I am having to relearn to cook for daily daily, and then some.  Proportions are drastically different when you only eat a few times a week versus eating once or twice a day even.  Yeah, I'm working on it.  Whatever else, life is really improving.  I still have to negotiate, cover for weak points, mess with sleep or just put up with it as it is.  Life is returning to these bones, though.  That is certain.  Back to digesting breakfast.  Later.

Rather than fight a losing battle, a retreat was called.

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The last few days have been difficult.  Malaise, sleepiness, inefficiency... dragging butt, really.  I was doing everything I could.  Medicines, other than Monday I think, were on track.  I was eating at least a few bites a day.  I was sleeping reasonably well, if I seemed to be waking a bit early if that was only shaving an half hour to hour off my schedule, and that will little work so it wasn't exactly a stretch.  The engine and caboose of my train were fighting each other to no good ends.  I was becoming slightly worried that I might be in for a downturn.

Last night, though, way early for me compared to the last week and an half, I would guess, the opportunity to get to bed early occurred.  I took it.  I was in bed before 22:00, and probably asleep shortly after.  That would be like you going back to bed at noon?  Something like that.  Oh, and I slept well, if I woke rather early... close to 3:00.  Which makes sense, when you plug all the numbers into a spreadsheet.  Perhaps that took care of the building slight deficiency.  Or, maybe, my body just needed extra sleep for it's own reasons.  All I know is, since waking, life is good.  I feel ready to hit some things today, finally, again.  Some odds and ends, but mainly the living room, and testing the snow blower.  Odds and ends may end up being impressive.  No worries, I won't bother boring you with them today.  I might do a summary, later, or not.

Dreams.  A short one and a long one.

In the short one, the first one, I found myself in the kitchen, talking to my wife about shopping.  With three children, shopping trips were at least once a week.  Sometimes one, sometimes the other, and just sometimes a lunch date with both of us, having found a sitter.  Today was the latter.  We were going over our various checklists.  When shopping together, we would split the list by type and placement, meeting toward the front of the store.  I was faster moving, but she faster at finding, so it... worked out well enough.  A new tech arrived, where you could take virtual items you had on hand, in with you.  If they were ripening a bit slowly, you could even check the virtual version through a system, then manipulate the real with the data, and they would ripen more quickly.  The wife was not so in to new tech.  With herself, me, and three children... new ideas were just not fun.  Hand-holding through systems and processes, though, if they were simple enough, it what it took to get her on board... if she liked the results.  And if she decided she trusted the system.  Fair enough.  It wasn't a fancy dream, but it was real enough seeming.  No sex, no this, no that, just domestic... near bliss.  Good enough for this old dog.  I think that part of life... is just as much as any of it.  I enjoyed this dream a good deal.

In the next dream, I was an older woman, a widow of a wealthy man.  Somehow I got my nose bent out of shape about prisoners.  I decided to put my money, effort, and time into training prisoners for work, rather than have them sit around all day.  Or worse.  It took a great deal of advocating to various powerful men.  The governor, industrialists, even the prisoners themselves.  In time, it worked.  A minor arrow production system was created.  Myself, another woman, and a man, became the leads on the project.  All with similar goals and ideas.

Some parts of it were rather dangerous to work.  With the often poorly educated inmates, so those of us who were in charge decided to take those tasks on ourselves, after several inmates died in the process.  In time we became a force to be reckoned with, in the industry.  Wooden arrows, really.  For a dozen, or score, of years, we trained inmates in various skills, starting from the simplest, advancing them as they were able, on up to managerial tasks, accounting, mechanics, on down to simply being to work, on time.  It became quite a thing.  In time, hunters began using rifles more before, and new types of arrows were being produced.  Still, the program struggled on.

The three of us who created and ran the program were getting older.  None of us were young when we started, time does no favors.  With the change in hunting methods, and competition in the arrow field, the program was beginning to wind down.  Finally, when the other lady on the directors board, and dear friend in the dream, was killed doing one of the dangerous processes, the program finally came to a halt.  In some ways, I was very sad to see it go.  On another hand, it was time.  I suppose I had just hoped it would have ended on a different note.  I can't say the program helped a single inmate find his way to a new life, records were not kept.  But that was the hope, and opportunity for that had been created.

Strange dreams.  But that is the dream world.  And, nothing so strenuous that today isn't a good one, or at least it is starting out quite well.  Good day.

Old, new, why.

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Not even ammonia and day tripping can stop the bell.  She sings, I waltz.  That is neither new or old, it's just the way it works with men.

Work or play, or play work?

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I did get to bed earlier than usual, if for no good reason.  I didn't do a bit more work after packing and storing the bowls, glasses, and cups.  I was simply done.  I figured I'd need to rest a bit, sooner or later.  Last night, and the next few days, I suspect, are it.  Oh, I'll fiddle and all.  Focus is off, energy is down, and that is that.  Even so, I get more done than I often have in a week compared to this summer.  Even yesterday, I did an half dozen little things... a bit of sweeping, cleaning off a counter, this, that, and the other thing.  And food production is ongoing.  An extra meal a day when meals come in, and at least a meal a day otherwise.  Two meals is quite good, but even one a day is golden.  If I am not losing weight, I am solidifying, or... something.  Often, this summer, a whole weeks work was merely emptying my bladder on time.  Yes, I can do less if thankfully that doesn't lead to accidents.

The choices are slim today.  I would still like to tinker in the living room, at least prepping it for a heavier cleaning.  I would love to rake today, but I don't have that kind of energy and know it right now.  But, too, my camera did arrive today.  I have the batteries charged, one in the body, one on the handgrip and I have tested the latter to satisfaction.  I have run through some of the setup, adding time, date, and setting a few controls as I prefer them.  I have added the lens, tinkered with that just a bit.  Some of my tinkering has been from advice in the direction I mean to go, some of it has been from my own preferences after reviewing a lot of material.  I might tinker with it more today, or not.  While it seems like play, it is play work.  This is not a point and click.  I think it has an auto mode, and variations of it.  I am looking more for manual mode.  I have had a lower level amateur camera before, but not nearly this involved.  And that was some time ago.

Actually, my first photographs will be the Christmas lights, maybe tonight.  I will review some of the material I bookmarked, look through a guide I purchased, and either tonight or tomorrow I will be giving that a go.  I will need to install the RAW converter, probably to the laptop, before I can tinker with the images.  The camera, and all things about it, are much more complex than it seems on paper.  You just point and press a button, right?  From figuring out iso, white balance, and the rest, to setting up the tripod mount, then converting the images for just the right look.  Further, it's all subjective, to a degree.  The nice thing about this hobby?  Even if I can't get out, or up, or to projects, I can sit and take pictures from right where I sit.  As I said, I have been looking for hobbies that don't cost energy, time, travel.  But could also include those things.  Ta-da!  Is it better than gaming?  Could be.  Then again, some people can make a living off gaming, so...  Still, yeah... it's better than gaming.  It involves the real world, and involvement in it.

For now, however, after tinkering as I could, I will just rest and relax until I am ready to hit it some more.  Just a bit off, for some, or no, reason.  A shower shortly.  A bit of music in an attempt to kickstart the day...  I don't know.  It's a blah day, even with Christmas early.  Later.

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Can't stop tinkering.  But then, I keep thinking of things.  A few settings I remembered but haven't found come to mind, and so the camera comes out.  It's much easier to find controls and settings when guided, but I sort of like fumbling through and checking things out on the way.  Some I haven't figured out how to find yet, but I'll get there.  Then there are bits to add or setup.  Most recently, I realized I hadn't installed the memory cards.  Then to format those.  The last step mechanical thing to do is to install a screen shield.  I'll do that when I'm in a better mood or condition for fine motor control and fussing.  I could do that, and do it well, right now.  It is simply that it would be annoying to do right now.  I'm just not waking up well.  In hopes of waking up, and to attempt to push that along, I'll look over information on nighttime shooting, and landscapes, in the hopes of taking my first pictures tonight. 

Oh, and for some things, like the added battery grip, when you put that on or take it off, there are a number of little steps, beside just adding and removing, that you have to take.  There is a plastic piece that covers the battery body connector to the camera, and a rubber piece to place, depending on whether adding or removing the device, onto the various parts.  Minor details, but potentially very important ones.  It's quite the little device.  I must admit, it makes me nervous, just a bit, to fiddle with too much.  I'll get used to it before too long.  Finding that balance between babying it and taking things for granted leading to a drop is... just going to have to be figured out.  Just like a real baby, I suppose?  Even a real babe of various sorts.  Yumbleh.  Yeah, funny.

Strange.

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I think I will get my smaller work load done tonight, and early.  I loaded the containers, glasses, and mugs, preparing them first, into boxes.  Transported them to the basement and found a good place for them.  I did a couple of other smaller things, such as beginning to charge the batteries for the camera.  I have the socks and clothes in easy reach for finishing.  If I do that, I'll do a little bit of looking over the place just to get ready for anything tomorrow.  Then I may simply go to bed a bit earlier tonight.

The camera seems to be on some sort of delay.  I am not getting updates.  It was supposed to be in today.  I have no clue when to expect it, now.  They aren't saying if it was broken, lost, or if there was some other problem.  I would like to have that soon.  UPS has been very good to me.  One mishap in a hundred packages I can manage.  I just wish I had an idea of when it will arrive.  It is merely anticipation, though.  There is no huge race, or hurry, or need.  I have, or will have, everything else in by then.  I have a little box just for all camera related pieces and bits.  I should have my photo editor installed by the time I get the camera as well.  I actually have a minor project, a drywall repair, in mind for my first project walkthrough.  I am interested in taking pictures of my home, with the Christmas lights set up.  I want to get pictures of the girls.  I have asked my friend if he would mind being used for portrait practice.  And I have asked another group of people, tentatively, once I become more practiced, if they would mind me taking some snappy snappies for practice.  Then to edit those a bit and offer the data to whomever.

Tomorrow?  I really am hoping to sweep and vacuum, then prepare the living room for a steam treatment, or three.  That will pretty much be my whole day, I think.  If I finish that tomorrow, I will have to wait for that carpet to dry before figuring what else to do in the cave.  So, it would be a good time to begin tearing into the garage.  Moving stuff, "dusting" or whatever will pass for that out there, sweeping, than arranging this and that.  I didn't start the snow blower yet, so I may get that going, checking the oil first, adding some fresh gas, and perhaps just letting the machine burn through a tank.  Oh, and I suppose I could try to get the twigs burned.  I really don't want those sitting out there all winter.

After that, I am hoping to tear into my bedroom.  Remove everything.  Vacuum and steam vac, and probably just live out of the spare bedroom until that carpet is dry.  Moving some of that will be tricky.  It's not weight so much as fragility and size.  Moving a mountain isn't so much of a problem.  Moving a sand castle is.  I might even see if it needs a coat of paint, and consider that, while I am at it.  Hmm...  I might want to tear out the vanity in the en suit before I do that.  As I said, I plan to simply put heavy, lower hanging, shelving in to replace a vanity in the en suite.  So I will need to paint the bathroom as well, to cover where the old vanity, and mirror I will be removing as well, were.  But painting was on the menu anyway. 

Yes, it's all possible.  I have been keeping up, and doing extra.  Food, mostly, some days.  Sweeping after I drop something on the floor and just once in a while just because.  Keeping up on trash and recycling.  Staying on top of dishes and laundry.  And, as I said, doing more, sometimes much more.  This is good, very good.  I'm liking it.  It's like I've come back to life again, much as that first summer on medicine.  I bet it was lower dose, but I won't swear to it.  Perhaps I have simply burned out on the stuff.  Anyway...  This is about as optimal as I can make it.  Slow but really sure.  Later.

Oh...  I've been ordering fudge for Christmas.  I don't want to order even one more thing, though, this month.  But I really love walnut fudge.  So I looked up a couple of recipes.  I think I should be able to do that easily.  My double boiler, at present, is a chemical one, so I can't use it.  But I do have glass bowls and smaller pots that would work just fine.  The trick is, if you want really good stuff?  Start with quality ingredients.  Finding walnuts that aren't too acidic is going to be a trick, the chocolate shouldn't be too difficult.  Yeah, and it is much cheaper to make.  Well... if I watch it just a bit.  You could spend a fortune if you want some high-falutin' furrin chocolate.  Same with anything, I suppose.

Yeah, no to raking.

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I did finish the dishes, and tinkered on a few other things.  I didn't get to it all.  Then again, remember, yesterday I thought it nothing was going to happen.  And, of course, my ability to plan work is still a rough thing.  I feel a bit drained today, or at least this "morning".  I won't really make a plan today, other than hoping to finish those tasks from yesterday... pairing the socks, putting up the last bits of laundry, and packing and storing the glasses and containers, putting that or those boxes in the basement.  Yes, I did reset the timer on the Christmas lights. 

Sleep was oddball.  I woke several times, but never quite awake.  Enough oddity in that last that I might simply have dreamed that I was awake.  Dreams, I am sure, but no memory remains.  Vivid, is all I can recall.  As a term.  Much as if you normally live on apples and potatoes and someone slips a lemon in there, only visually based.  Vivid for certain.  Nothing fancy, I don't think, just... visually stunning.

A few days, actually, will be spent sort of down.  I would like to do little things each day, maybe a bigger project.  I am feeling a bit worn.  Weather might be changing.  Perhaps it is merely getting cooler.  It still feels more like fall than winter, and by the calendar... nah, it is probably winter now.  Something is going on.  Still, I am pretty sure I can at least do a few light tasks each day.  It is becoming more common for me to see a problem, project, or area to clean, and just do it.  It has been an amazing month, especially compared to the rest of the summer and fall.  I do believe it will carry through the winter.  With ups and downs, like today.  I am very pleased with my efforts though, recently.  I won't complain.

Later.

That was a fast recovery!

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While I thought "today" was going to be a wash, possibly a complete wash, I seem to have miscalculated.  I took "morning" medicines immediately, then started on a general slog for what I had proposed to be a dead day.  I decided to take care of trash, since I seemed up to it.  Which I did, and cleaned the litter boxes, while grabbing the recycling bag on my way.  Further, since the bin was a third full, I decided to take that to the curb.  When I returned, I swept the kitchen, if not all of it, put new bags in, and kept going.  I next washed the dishes and set them to a hot rinse.  Not thinking I was quite done, I grabbed a laundry basket and collected the socks.  That was enough, though I did set a steak to salt.  I salt those for an hour, to tenderize and come to room temperature before cooking.  It works, try it some time.  I set the timer for an hour.  But that was that.

Almost everything I thought I might get done "today" was done, in a flash.  I have since cooked my late dinner, eaten it, and am digesting for a while.  Oh, but the hot rinse had cooled, so I warmed that about halfway through my break.  If it is warm enough when I finish my break, I will move on to drying those, putting up the regular dishes and such, then wrapping and boxing the extra glasses and cups along with the glass containers, and taking that whole box downstairs for storage.  I wanted to hone a razor or two, again, with more information I have garnered through research, but I won't do that until I have my tabletop cleared again.  I might have that done yet tonight, if I am mostly through should I finish that.  I might yet put up some clothes, deal with the socks, and reset the laundry baskets, but probably no more and maybe not that.

I am still stumbling a bit.  I haven't quite gotten a good reading on what a reasonable set of work is, and that still varies from day to day.  But even just a few things, every day, and life is really smoothing out.  I am doing in days what I would do in a week, or even more sometimes this summer.  It's been a rough one.  I think my medicine change is exactly what I needed.  I will attempt to work it up, just a bit more, but that is all.  If it is too much, this time, I will just jack it back down.

The chances of me getting to some real work, and exercise, are much more real.  I still have a ways to go, but getting to things, getting up, getting out... all have been happening rather well.  I won't say it has been easy.  I still have to push, pull, and sweat.  I really am about as close to death's door as someone should be, even if passing through isn't a threat, getting to things is very difficult.  I am doing very well, but even these things are difficult.  Difficult I can handle, impossible... not so much, at least usually.  Oh, and I have been researching dozens of projects, the camera and some software, trying to figure out some security issues with machines, and so on.  Even my down time is productive, or at least more so.

I'll probably wish you good night/day now.  I'm getting tired.  If I do the work I have planned, and a bit more, I might not get back to post.  So, yes, good night/day.

Oh, another thought.  If it is reasonably warm tomorrow, I may actually get out and rake instead of other planned affairs.  Why?  I can't really say.  I'm not sure what the whole thing with raking is about, to be honest.  Perhaps to put a more public face on my new life, perhaps for social norms, perhaps just to be out in the air.  Yes, it will snow fairly soon.  Few will even know what I did, fewer still even of those who know will know why.  Late is the hour of the season.  But... just because I can, if I can, if I wake early enough that there is still enough light is the one caveat to the plans.  And, if I get to it, I might burn the branches.  I am told we can't burn leaves, so will just bag those.  But branches can burn, and if I do that first, I can keep an eye on that.  Yes, good night.