Yeah, some things.

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A few things.  Learning to use the computer again is... interesting.  I haven't quite created a functional area to sit and use the machine.  I am cramped in, until I make proper space for a comfortable sit.  As well, I am having to figure out how to adjust for vision, as the screen is set way back, and the machine itself, and router, need the space that would allow the screen to be moved.  After a bit, I found how to embiggen the screen matter without messing up the whole lot.  Other problems to be sorted, one at a time.

I have gone to amazon.  They do have repair kits.  I'm not sure if I have enough money, so will need to check through my bank.  The problem is... wait... I know my password?  I have been juggling so many passwords, and on a different machine, that I became slightly confused.  However, I know this stupid bank will require a message, sent through the phone (that was stolen), or maybe an email?  I do have the email address' passwords, but I am not sure if I have access to gmail.  It didn't work on the ps4.  I'll check that.  Not sure which email is connected to the bank.  Bleh.

Enough tech messing and the brain gets blurry.  But... one more thing and we shall see.  I am waiting just a bit before letting the ducks out.  The cats will be fed shortly thereafter.  Hmm, I seem to still be able to type, and am improving rapidly even then.  I will have to learn a few tricks, and familiarization is weak, but... I definitely like the keyboard better, and mouse.  Mostly.  I'll give the email a try, then the bank.  Blah.

Later.
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Ah-ha!  I got in to gmail, then through my bank, and, yep.  I ordered replacement parts.  Ugh but life can be messy some days.  Later.

Someone woke me.

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A pebble, against the wall, woke me.  I looked, but no one obvious.  Someone checking to see if they could break in.  Not tonight.  I figured someone was doing that.  I just hadn't actually caught them before.  Up.  Now.  Oh well.  It was about 3:30.  I got some good sleep before that.  I may well get more sleep.  Blood sugar was 212 fasting, or so.  But, with it so low, I hadn't taken the slow acting insulin at bedtime.

I tore back into the controller.  Yea, no.  One of the pad devices had come undone.  I had hoped it was friction-fit.  Not so much.  I tried superglue.  No such luck.  It seems superglue doesn't work on silicone, the facing material that holds t he button tabs.  I had an extra, two, controllers.  One was compromised somehow.  The other may well have been stolen.  I'll look for it.  I did notice someone else has opened the shell on the controller I was working on.  They... weren't very careful, chipped where they went in..  Careless, sloppy.  You can't even tell I have been in the thing.  As is, it works, just without a right direction key.  I will look for a parts kit.

Still so very tired.  I don't get it.  Can barely stand.Plenty of cool fresh air, enough food, medicine and insulin now.  BP and blood sugar controlled.  So tired it hurts in the bones, if not the kind that demands sleep.  Focus is extremely difficult.  I should get some slow acting insulin in.

I haven't found my phone.  The truck was checked, it isn't there.  It could be in some odd place, or beside the road somewhere.  It had been on, but calling, at this point, just leads to the answering service.  I had recently plugged in google maps, and turned on tracking.  If I can figure that out, from the computer I might be able to track it's last location.  Maybe.

Ugh.  Later.

A bit and still odd.

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Okay, no real work.  Still quite exhausted.  I first worked on my controller.  It was sticky.  I... did something wrong.  I'll get back to it in a bit.  I also sewed the pockets on one of my pj's.  Well?  I improved.  It is done.  I will definitely do better with the next three or four.  By the way, not only can I easily thread a very small needle, I don't generally need a thimble!  Thick skinned, literally.

Blood sugar was at 106, then 90 just now.  So, of course, no more insulin.  But a rib and brot would be good.  And I best keep an eye on it.  That really could kill me, quickly.

It is heating up fast.  Food then a nap.  Later.

An exhausted beginning.

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Down by one.  I opened up the two usual windows, turned on all three fans, and opened two additional windows to see if that would make a difference.  It... did, slightly.  It was two degrees cooler than closed with ac.  What was I nattering regarding about, to an old friend recently?  Ah!  Margins!  Yes.  Two degrees for a bit of crawling and a lowered ac bill?  Okay.

The thing  is, I woke with a body so physically exhausted, rolling out of bed was a p.i.t.a.!  Shutting windows hurt.  Then, after making it downstairs, I had forgotten my modern upstairs.  I have been removing that and hiding it because someone has taken to using my system at night/when I am asleep.

I must have almost caught the perp, several times.  The last time, the back door was nearly unlocked, of course from the inside... a hook and one of the locks on the inner door were undone.  I always lock those.  The cats have never unlocked them.  It won't be pretty if I do catch whoever.  The sheriff will be involved.  And any attack or resistance will lead to an ambulance or the morgue, for someone.  If they are armed and ready to murder for burglary, it will be me.  I don't mind.  Amen.

Because of such devastating exhaustion, right away, I decided to check blood sugar.  The device I had hobbled together suddenly stopped working, flashing some error signal.  Oddly, my main device, which had disappeared from where I had kept it for years, showed back up in a place I had searched many times.

It works.  So, I used it.  *sigh*  Blood sugar was 216 fasting.  Not superior, of course.  But a vast, almost impossible, improvement from the 395 fasting read from yesterday.  I have to wonder if the drop, even if still high, is whyfor the exhaustion?  I think so.  I still have slight tunnel vision and a few other symptoms from that crash.  Plus, I am having trouble just with energy to breath.  I am having to consciously breath, and deep enough.  I will take it slowly today.

The ducks were let out, and fed.  The young gents have been gourging, and are getting massive.  Not quite as tall as my senior drake, if almost.  But they almost certainly outweigh him.  For now his seniority will hold sway.  But they may endanger him when breeding becomes a thing.  I really need to hobble a tractor for the muscoveys.  If the four total hens become too beset, ready or not, I may have to cull males.  Two, if that works, three if no other choice.

A brot and chicken drumstick as breakfast?  Yes.  Perhaps a fatted coffee too, low dose... my figure, you know!  I will add insulin, but just a middling dose and only of the fast acting.  Trash gathered and out is the only absolute chore(tm).  But a final load of laundry, dishes, and counters plus stovetop are on the menu... if I can stand without breaking into a sweat, or falling.  Weird.

It was 55° outside, at 07:30.  I opened things a bit more because of that, and am reaping the benefits.  The ceiling fan, once remembered, is proving an exceptional tool in... if not actually keeping it cool(?), definitely lending to a practically wonderful perception.  Now, 73° feels chill, 75° is partially tolerable, and 70° is that near cold I so desire.  It's not winter, but it's... what... the equivalent of 60° for an Iowa summer day?  I'd lay money on people feeling such.

Have a great day.  Get to church if it is open and not in obeisance to the filthy blm or antifa.  I tried a y.t. mass, but it was queerified and unGodly.  Convergence must provide much better funding than true Godliness.  Paid for by Soros and central banking.  Eventually they will just send in antifa to finish the job, as they did at the start of the USSR.  It won't be killing the church, that is in the hearts of the people now.  It will just be eliminating the enemies of the church who occupy the buildings.

Good but odd day.

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Music was handled.  It has been... troubling me, for some longish time.  I was hoping it would go away.  Like a cold, infection, pest, or other irritant.  It wouldn't cease.  No choice.  The response section was done nearly immediately, to be done with the bother, whole, once and... for the moment.  Cursed or blessed with what and how I see.  Whether I share or not, it will, has, always been there.

Medicine has been taken.  And, after scratching around, seeking all the old glucometers I could find, I hobbled one together that works with my tabs.  And?  395!  So... back on insulin.  I took my slow acting, once daily, immediately.  As well, I had a small keto meal, then took a max dose of fast acting.  I also did a blood pressure read.

Six days ago, bp was 220/134, pulse 98.  Three days ago, it was 185/122, pulse 102.  Today, it was 138/97, pulse 93.  It took a bit.  Another week and I add the extra 3.125mg tabs, twice a day.  Which is more than humans take daily.  That will put me at 31.25mg of the stuff... carvedilol.  Everything else is up to regular doses, no side effects with any of the rest of it.  Getting up to dose has been mostly painless this time.  If I am still rather crushed under the weight of the stuff.

As the afternoon passed, I started to feel... odd.  Ill?  First thing I do, when on insulin and feel off in any way, is to check blood sugar.  It felt like a low read, but how could it be!  It was.  It had dropped 316 points, to 79, in five hours.  If I suspect most of that drop was almost instantaneous there at the end.  I am almost sure of it.  Odd as that may be.  And I believe it would have kept going.  I took a glucose tab.  Fifteen minutes later, still feeling rough, perhaps worse, I took another.  Ten minutes later I was still horrible.  I decided to eat potato salad.  It is now 170.  High, but... I still have remnants of tunnel vision and other diabetic crash symptoms.  That is so very odd.

I may set the hutch up, and try to gets the ducks in?  Or... stay up for one more read, in a few hours, before messing with my fowl friends?  Yea.  But I will set up their water and open it up.  I wish to see if food, perhaps a small... tiny... dose of insulin with food as well... miight be prudent.  If it has gone up.  If it stayed the same, a touch of food, as well if it has dropped.  More food if it dropped much, but keto.  Later.

I certainly enjoy responses.

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As well, I have a few of my own.  Fair play, even if foul.  Fowl ball?  Bad bird?

I... almost... remember?

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So off.  But these have been coming together, as a slow but terrible storm over the whole of the central plains.  Maybe literally, and in sync with the physical realm?

I can't make full sense of it all.  Though, I will explain some things.  Do you honestly think God hates anyone, or anything?  Think on that deeply.

Lucifer?  I tell you, no.  Hate the sin, not the sinner.  For those, even if drawn to darkness, who... or which... at this point, can't choose good or evil, so aren't capable of grace or damnation, even these will only receive death.  As any animal.  Mostly.  Paul, I believe, Saint Paul if he may have had doubts about that, suggested there was possibility for even those.  Rare.

In any case, when Satan visited Jesus, in the desert, in order to tempt the Christ, do you think Jesus couldn't have cast him out?  Perhaps slain him?  I write "him", but could well have used the terms  "snake", "Lucifer", "her", "dragon", etc.  Those, some form, some once analogy... or synonym(?), all physical for a being of spirit with thoughts of her own.  Jesus could have outright denied her.  He didn't.  Not only did they speak, they travelled together a bit.  Why, if so antagonistic?  War, as men know it, is false, wrong, but the only way.  Same with peace.

Still awake.

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Sleep has been beckoning since 9:00.  At 13:00 I would love to sleep.  But there are a few items set to arrive.  I wish to stay up until they do.  The ducks are in the right place to be herded in early as well.  The trick is to not scare them while opening their pen.  If I can avoid that, odds are good.

A few pieces of ribs, a piece of chicken.  Some shared with the girls.  No work, but I have been crashing all morning.  I am hoping to get to some of it tonight and tomorrow.  Dishes, more laundry, a redo of the counters and stovetop, then the ones I haven't hit.  Maybe some work in the bathroom, and a shower.  Always plenty to do.

As soon as packages arrive, bedtime.  Good night.

3:30?

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Again, my area was 73°, while the rest of upstairs was 68°.  That really is unusual.  It is two nights running, a unique streak and as singulars.  It was 62° outside, and 73° downstairs.  It stayed around 75° well after dark tonight.  Something in the wind, which also persisted until late.  But why only three hours, pretty much exactly, down.  I need more sleep.  So tired.

I will tinker on machines, try to wake, become active.  If possible, a load or two of dishes.  If not, as I go back to bed, perhaps a load of laundry in, or at least folding.  In a worst-case scenario, back directly to bed as I fall.  It is a... reasonable night.  No pain.  I am just so TIRED!

Hopefully some of that cooling can be brought in.  It is so warm, or feels it.  For me, 73° is, usually, a bit too hot.  Tonight is typical in that way.  On the good side, I missed my last dose yesterday.  Not noticing I almost missed it all at about when starting dinner.  While I can start at 25 mg of carvedilol, usually, mostly, I am deathly afraid of double doses.  Won't kill me... so far... but it's like a severe beating with a baseball bat (from experience, if I ended up winning that one), mixed with the flu, on top of intermittent organ failure.  But, five to seven hours apart is easily safe.

I'll... see.  Later.

A late rise.

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Intentions.  The goal was to be to bed by noon, at the latest.  At this phase of medication titration, days are odd.  There are two wake periods and two sleep periods.  The length of any particular group can produe two or three "days" in a day.  As medication becomes normalizes, and as the world cools until it gets cold, those periods may end up going the other way... where my "day" actually consumes several actual days.  It makes planning, scheduling, almost impossible.

As it turns, I couldn't sleep until 15:00, 16:00?  Perhaps a wee later.  Exhaustion doesn't always allow for sleep.  I really don't understand.  Willpower, exhaustion, excitement, and other factors, can act exactly as supposed, or act opposite to their presentation.  Even caffeine can do oppositional action.  I am often too tired to sleep!

The alarm was set for both 18:00 and 19:00.  I almost didn't set the 19:00 alarm.  Poo-pooing that I wouldn't, couldn't, wake.  Almost.  Glad I did.  When the alarm sounded at 18:00, trying to... the world looked somewhere between Picasso and Dali.  Seriously. I knew I wasn't waking, or shortly.  I, very carefully, turned that alarm off... snooze partitions would have made it worse.  The 19:00 alarm remained.

I kept bumping awake, as if the snooze was active.  Finally, at 18:43, I surrendered... in part realizing food would also be late, if the Boss arrived at the earlier time.  I had beef ribs, but they need salted.  I prefer salting an hour before cooking.  Or, barring that option, salting right as they go in.  As was the case tonight.  However, cook time would be a bit shy.  Plus I had to boil eggs.  Ugh.

I got up, and to it.  But it looks like no Boss.  No supper.  I did cook the ribs short, but have the grill going for finishing.  As well, the eggs were done, then potato salad finished.  I'll have a few ribs tonight, put everything up, and attempt work when I wake.  The ducks did go in earlier again tonight!  That really makes life easier.

A strange night, again.

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Strange for different reasons.  I was very sleepy at bedtime, around 22:30?  At the latest.  With it being cool out, I just used fans upstairs, with the door to the downstairs open.  I woke at 02:30, but kept sleeping until 03:30.  It was 73° both times I woke, near me.  It was 68° on the other thermometer.  An unusually high difference.  It was 64° downstairs.

Thermal dynamics here is strange.  Though my contribution to that is strange too.

Sleep was good, but short.  I may be going back to bed shortly.  I couldn't work.  I did have two drumsticks.  Do you know how you know you did well with chicken?  If it isn't too salty while warm to hot nor too bland cold.  Without warming them up, they were quite good.

I will let the ducks out, close up shop, then go on to bed.  So tired.  The sun is up and out, if it is still cool.  I had hoped to get eggs boiled.  Later.  I may not be progressing quickly, but I am not falling too far behind.  I'll get back to it when possible.  Perhaps in a couple weeks, when medication settles and high summer ebbs?

I will do anything possible.  Maybe some things impossible?  Good night again?  Later, almost certainly.

Some serious chicken.

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Brined.  Drained.  Patted dry.  Seasoned with salt, fresh ground pepper, and an Italian blend... a light touch.  Fried in the oven... in a cast skillet, initially covered by a cast placket.  Never airtight, but allowing drippings to baste, the placket removed for the last 15 minutes of a 40 minute, at 425° F, cooktime and temp.

Oh, quite as good of chicken as I have ever made.  Potato salad?  So far only so-so.  The eggs I boiled came out soft, as in runny, yolked.  While truly delicious, not right for potato salad.  As well, too much mustard, though with an half to whole pound of eggs 'missing', it would have too much.

The good news is that I  have time to boil more eggs, correctly.  Each way I try to boil eggs can take vastly different times.  This method, I think, will take eleven minutes.  But, tomorrow.  Everything will be put up.  As it turns out, while it rained lightly today, it may rain very heavily tonight, so no supper company.

I must have slept wrong.  Both of my arms were asleep this morning, and are just starting to feel better.  The odd thing was, I was awake often through the night and morning, until the final awakening.  I never sensed a problem, usually do (if there isn't always I can do that changes the outcome).  Ugh.  First they woke slowly, then they ached, now they are beginning to not hurt.  Mostly.

I am so tired.  I did get the second load of laundry set.  A trim and shower were enjoyed, and dishes set for a soak.  Plus food made.  I have a few items to store and refrigerate.  Tomorrow will be easy.  I think I left my phone in a friend's truck?  I have no way to contact him, currently.  Bleh.

I was about to say, " Later".  But, after putting food up, I believe it to be bedtime.  So, good night.  Sleep well.

An odd day and weird events.

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It was 70°, read at both thermometers, upstairs.  Unusual.  Usually two degrees difference.  And with both ac's running?  It was 70° downstairs, but is up to 72° after the machine was on for a few hours.  And, just checking outside, it is 72° and a bit humid?  Yes.  A rather peculiar occurance in these parts, especially at this temp and being high summer.  It must be something from the south?  Remember, it is usually 86° for cool days in July.  So 72° is... nearly miraculous.  And a whole day of overcast?  Rare even in August.

While refreshing water for the ducks, I realized they were in place to possibly be herded in to the pen.  So, after finishing that task, I left their hutch doors open and reentered the side back door.  Then I emerged out the front door, so as to put them between myself and their hutch.  I gently, distantly, let them know I was there.  Slowly I approached, guiding them into the hutch the way you steer on snow?  I think so.  In they went.  I don't usually feed them at night, but there wasn't much left, I wished to encourage good behavior, and they are leaving the hutch well in the morning without food draw now anyway.  So, perhaps in the future?  Or just on overcast days?  Perhaps I can get them in earlier.

Oh?  Whoever borrowed feed has replaced it.  I'll not complain about that going forward.  Though, if I might?  I would suggest just borrowing a bag.  I usually keep two extra.  It would be easier.  Though I still much prefer a request.  Still, wanted to let you know that I noticed.  And payment, in full and then some, is appreciated.  Just ask next time.  Or leave a note.  I don't even need to know who.  I work on a relaxed system... as long as repayment is made.

I slept after the last post.  Down around 15:00ish.  I set the alarm for 18:00, but hoped to be up before that.  I think it was shortly after 16:00 when I woke.  With ducks tended quickly, and nearly immediately for some unknown reason, I then emptied the dishes in prep for a shower and then to reset those.  Too tired to then shower, I took a break to rest and post.

Next, I'll check laundry.  If the first load is dry, I'll pull clothes for a shower, set the next load drying, but am done with laundry, other than completely drying and perhaps folding those clothes, for today.  I hate having my panties in a bunch!  ;p  Otherwise I will reset laundry drying.  I am really looking forward to getting the clothesline up.  While I won't put everything out... think underwear... I will put much out.  It isn't a real money savings, definitely not a time savings, it is just fresher clothing?  Or just the idea... ideal?  Meh.  I don't know.

A shower, then setting up dishes for a fresh soak, and then supper preps.  Chicken drumsticks, leftover brots, and potato salad for the boss, mostly.  Potatos were boiled earlier.  I best boil eggs and brine the chicken.  You know, bbq sauce improves even chicken.

I have been tracking my work.  Trying to increase work times.  But with being off medicine was crippling me, then getting back on meds have pummeled me, as much as it might sound, about eight hours a week is as much as possible.  As little as three hours one recent week.  And that includes food, showering, laundry, dishes, and pets... everything most people don't even count?  *shrug*  I'll keep at it.  I need to find or replace my glucometer.  I just wish amazon got back to two day delivery.  Later.

As the day passes...

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At a quarter after ten, it is 62° outdoors.  It is 70° in the main while 66° in the front room.  I just shut everything down so as to take a nap.  The ducks were let out, a baked potato for breakfast, and a load from the wash to the dryer, on a final spin, and another load into the washer.  A start.  As well, potatos boiled for potato salad today or tomorrow.

It did rain.  According to sidewalks.  The driveway didn't look as if it had rained, but the sidewalks were conclusive.  Just when I can't say.  Odd how some places really show it while others don't.  Not even all sidewalks show it.  And it looks to have been a reasonable rain.

I have been back on heart medicine for a week and a day.  I had been on insulin, but my blood sugar meter has gone missing.  I'll look again, again, again when I wake.  Too cold?  Yea.  So tired from that.  A nap, then to dishes and a shower, back to laundry, and more when I wake.  Good day.

A prayer.

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After speaking with my mother, I promised a prayer.  Rain.  It was suggested they sorely need rain.  Actually, we haven't received rain in some time either.  Still, in mind... July?  Rain is quite rare.  Not my problem.  So, I prayed.  A very simple quiet prayer.  Leaving it at that, I went about my day.

Now, I am not certain it has, or will, rain here... or anywhere.  Still, it is cloudy as if rain were possible this morning.  I am at least enjoying the cool of the day.  Will it rain here or there?  At His leisure, should He offer it.  Still, just this is quite a gift, for as long as lasts.  Amen.  No, it's never the one who prays...

I am hoping to use the cool to work.  Dishes, laundry, a shower, cleaning the bathroom, cleaning parts of the kitchen... perhaps other things.  Or... not.  I am hoping to work, but not really going to push.  I have chicken drumsticks thawed.  This time I will brine them before cooking.  I didn't last time.  They were a bit too bland.

I'll let the ducks out a bit later.  Hmm, but I will get laundry started.  I best gather all.  Then set a timer to feed the cats and start dishes?  It is hoped.  A shower then rinsing dishes, to be done after another break.  I... will try.  Have a great day.  Oh, it is wonderfully cool.  Later.

Sleep is good, if off.

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I had to sleep at 18:00, almost exactly.  I wanted to stay awake until I could put the ducks in, I couldn't stay awake.  I set the alarm and was able to get up and out in time.  Waking a few hours into sleep is a tricky thing, especially after a long day and fairly heavy work, compared to recent norms.  I wish I could get them to go in earlier.  Without a bird dog, they won't go and I can't round them up.  Bushes are too thick.

Back to bed, again, after putting them up.  Sleep until a bit after one.  I tried to sleep longer.  Made it to two.  A bit of online reading, a meal, and it looks like bedtime is returning at closing in on four.  A very cool night.  It sure seems it.  Good night, again.

Oh, a very good finale.

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A sunch was served, lupper?  Satisfactory.  I... was not satisfied.  The spices were a bit bland.  The heat was there, little more.  But, with lettuce, onions, tomato, and raw fresh sour cream?  Oh, the rest carried my minor flaw over the line.  The boss was happy enough.  I will practice.

And... a sort of food dare was finally completed.  Pig brains, in a can.  We both sampled.  This has been on the books for a long time.  Taste?  Not bad, if it smelled like wet canned cat food.  It was the texture.  Somewhere between chalky and meally, with a spam taste, and cat food smell.  Will not be a daily.  Would like to try fresh.

We made it without a gag, if he almost lost it.  I just laughed, if I had advice.  Of course I did!  I suggested he let his mind go blank, like when a woman talks at you.  Works with wonky food too.  Too late I realized he... doesn't have the skill, or see the need.  I think he... well... he will sort this out.  No offense ladies, it's... well... we have to defend ourselves.

As well, a newer machine was made operational.  Then the internet was set up.  As well, the password was found.  I should have an easier time with access, probably.  Ugh, but that front room is blazing.  I may have to figure out a way to get Internet upstairs.  Hmm, if the rig is wi-fi...

We also attempted to check a dead socket.  Definitely dead.  The way to it is... difficult.  May have to get estimates and go from there.  Quite a day, with and without help.  A nap is needed.  Later.

What a day!

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I think I have been awake for much of the night.  Think.  I think I woke sometime early morning?  Initially I could do nothing.  The duck pool was washed out and set up.  Running water is a rarity, but they got it today.  Fresh food today, as well.  They don't always finish their food.  Lately, every day.  I'll feed them as they will eat.

Then I had to sit.  I almost wondered about going on back to bed.  It wasn't that kind of tired.  After a bit, I collected dishes, put them in to soak, washed a bunch of mason jars... set them to soak leastwhile.  Then started on a couple of counter tops and the stove top.

Bit by bit I have taken bigger and smaller bites of chores.  Those counters, the stove top, and the cast have been cleared, cleaned, and seasoned as necessary.  As well, the bigger group of dishes was washed, then I got in for a shower, and finally everything was put back for a final wash soak.

Then, thinking I might be having lunch company, I got taco meat going.  Not sure company will be arriving.  All good.  I will have a taco salad, a glass of milk, and... I think that will be it.  Avocado?  Uhmm, yum.  I do like those.  Then?  A nap.  Blood sugar, without anything today, at 12:36, was 67.  At around 09:30, it had been 263?  Yes, but maybe I did dose?  And am using a new vial, with refills said to be arriving shortly?  I was almost sure I didn't.  Work and heat can do funny things to the read.

I'm just not sure.  Heart medicine, initially, hurts diabetes.  Once some envelope is extended beyond, it helps.  There are a lot of variables in play.  I caught it, by feel, and managed it.  And I will be eating soon.  All good.  Still, it really can startle.  That taco meat smells quite good.  Later.

She is a sweet girl.

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She doesn't always seem it.  She doesn't always want to be.  She is anyway.

A strange little horrible place in life.

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Too hot?  Too cold?  Same temperature, sometimes the same time!  Reminds me of women, as a general notion... if half the reason why I like them, strangely.

Strangely?  An echo or a grin, smile?  Strangely indeed.

So strange.  I am needing so much sleep.  I get it, but feel the need for more, but pain, the cold, heat, or mix doesn't allow for it.  What woke me most recently was a mixture of being too hot and too cold all at once.  Such a strange thing.  My feet were absolutely frigid, at 70°.  While my torso up was just too hot.  Obviously at the same temperature.  Definitely a female thing.  I wonder if women can cast curses?

I called my mother yesterday.  No response.  I will call when, if, I can reclaim function.  I am only awake to settle whatever was wrong.  I'm not actually functionally awake.  I am merely dealing with some biological oddity.  My mind wants to be sleeping in spite of nearly days down with very little uptime.  Hmm... maybe the cot would do.  It is 75° down here.  I am hoping it is 70° upstairs.  I would like it cooler, but... the heat out there just doesn't allow that.

Medicine.  But it could be, probably will get, worse.  I could easily spend two weeks to two months in my virtual coffin.  I'm always a little surprised when I start medicine full blast that something doesn't break, snap, give.  Or... maybe it does.  As mentioned, I don't die well, or even stay dead when I... get lucky.  Lucky... means different things to different people.

I'll keep at it, generally.  If getting a nap, or another 18 hours down, may well be a part of keeping at it.  Hmm, best set an alarm, so as to let the gigglers in.  Good night.