So very tired.

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Nothing doing about anything.  I am glad to be able to remain awake, or mostly.  So very tired.  The sleepy sort of tired.  Which is fine.  I did get chores finished.  I have since checked on the waterers.  All good.  It is warm enough that they haven't frozen.  Food is going slowly.  Odd though, how at 32 F, give or take, it seems cooler.  Then again, there is a breeze, fairly constant... almost a wind but not quite though just barely.

I do like checking on the critters.  As children might, they like it... and don't.  It is nice to be looked after, but it's not nice to have eyeballs over your shoulder too often.  And... what is too often is more a subjective than objective thing... in these terms anyway.  Sometimes I try to watch without them knowing.  So they don't get so upset.  It is a joy to watch them do their things.

I did get a shower in, if I hadn't mentioned it.  Such a splendid invention.  I know, if cold water was all that was available, I would skip bathing in the winter.  Just... wouldn't go there.  When I was younger, not only did I bath when it was cold, I did so just to prove out.  Now?  I have nothing to prove.  And cold is just... cold.

Back to gaming.  I'll try to get the ducks in early tonight, then pull the waterers... all right around hard dusk, so 18:00~18:30.  Then to get to bed.  I am going to have to push it to get there, but not too much.  Just a bit.  So tired.  Have a great day.

Well? Awake, I suppose.

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I did get to bed earlier, but... not all that much earlier.  I think it was around one?  A bit after.  I did set the alarms.  Blew through the first one, but the second one, in time, eventually woke me, or... lead to my waking.  Ugh.  Brutal.  The girls tried to help too.  They know when they want me up, but they also seem to know when I want, or am able (possibly) to wake, and will help.  Still, it was quite difficult to be awake before noon, I think before eleven.  But I did it.

A shower first thing, well and turning the heat up.  I treated the girls, as well.  Hmm... then rested as I wake.  Next I will get their litter, do chores, and... maybe make something to eat?  Yes.  I think that would be good.  A handful of pistachios already, but that's not best to eat as a whole meal.  A started snack, and occasional snack.

It looks like I am beating the ringworm.  A thick layer of desiccated skin has been coming loose.  I tried to peel it, but that... didn't work the best.  So I have been clipping it off, carefully.  Under is a fresh layer of underskin, as perhaps with a popped blister, which will have to grow out.  That is the price of getting rid of that, and a price easily paid.  I am still spraying it two to three times a day.  And will until I feel that the recovery will happen uncontested by the fungi... at least a few more days.

I think I pissed off a friend a while back.  He suggested he always felt like the adult, when around me.  He doesn't prefer that.  I suggested that that was the plan, but not the truth.  He... didn't like that, nor understand it.  He may not have believed it, either.  It is a mindful... and it isn't a comfortable notion.  The truth is, I only take over when there are no options.  And, should I do so, it is merely to an exacting end which I see a path.  As well, as much as possible, I will not reveal my involvement.  It was always your idea.  Trust me.  Though, often, I am unsure I should do so, only feeling compelled occasionally rightly or wrongly.

Well, that could all just be a story... or at least the parts I didn't actually state... the last parts.  Perhaps I am delusional.  Or, maybe, I really do... certain things in certain ways, and only when I see necessity.  Either way, that would be uncomfortable for some.  If what I say is true, it is in part because being in charge takes a great deal of energy.  I don't have it to spend on a permanent stake in life.  As well, I have always hated leadership, so not wanted to be a party to it.  If it is untrue, well... so be it.

I dreamed of having this conversation, carried out, last night.  How can you believe that?  Why would you do that?  Etc.  Not happy was the youngling.  Though, I have to say, until you understand to let go of the steering wheel most of the time, possibly even right to an accident?  That is beginning to know some aspect of God.  I am no where near so good, but... I am far closer than most of you would understand.  Or... that is my story, and I am sticking to it.  Be at peace, younglings.  And elders.  Though... I should add... even when I take the wheel?  I... realize it is not I who is in charge.  Even then.  It... causes me... wonder... about God too.  What... just exactly what... how? does He do, and not do, as He does?  ...or doesn't?  Amen.

I best get socks, shoes, and else on, and get to chores.  It's running late.  But... such is life for the near dead.  Ugh.  Have a good day.

About oyster stew.

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I realize some things, tonight.  As well, I implemented a few new things.  And will implement something else next time.  If I can recall.  The addition of guar gum was excellent.  I have tried to thicken it with heavy cream, butter, and else.  To no success.  But this?  This was excellent.  It will always be a guestimate sort of thing.

For this, at about half a cup of heavy cream, a stick of butter, two cups of milk, plus the oysters and juice, an half teaspoon, gelled in a quarter cup of the hottest tap water I have, created the perfect amount of slurry to thicken the pot.  I did add spice as well.  Cracked freshly ground black pepper, a touch of onion and garlic powder, and for my money... a dash of ground coriander.  Oh, it was solid.  Oh, and about an half teaspoon of salt.

Now, what I didn't do either time, but will try to remember to do if I ever make it again?  After doing the oysters, getting them to curl... pull them immediately.  Let them cool as the rest of the broth finishes.  It needs to be hot, where heating too long will harden the oyster.  Not the best.  Oh, and if oysters aren't your thing?  As they aren't my favorite (if I will eat them, obviously)?  Add mushrooms!  Oh my word, that with the butter, and flavor of the stew, definitely does well.  If you put them in raw, you really need to let them cook a while.  Seriously very good call.  I had some on hand, and believed they might do well, and that thought turned gold.

The ducks are in.  Rabbits were watered freshly three to four hours ago.  Then just a bit ago, their waterers were brought in.  Since I am out that way anyway, bringing in a pail of fresh water to refill the waterers, I am also bringing in fresh water from the tap, for the girls.  So, they get fresh water every day, and that gets refreshed twice as day.  I had been giving them softened water, which did cause some concern.  I am much happier to be giving them fresh water.  The reverse osmosis simply doesn't put out enough to keep up with the cats too.  I need to work on that, but... not for the cats.

I had thought it already Saturday.  Not sure why, sleep issues, I suppose.  Glad that it is just still Friday.  Hopefully some work tomorrow.  Not much today, but sleep was so off... insomnia almost destroyed me.  I am hoping to be to bed much earlier tonight.  I'll sleep alone, tonight.  The girls haven't been coming up anyway.  Not sure why.  Oh well.  Good night.

So very tired!

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I have eaten, yesterday and today, enough.  Almost.  I hadn't been eating for days, or... longer.  Not well.  I turned the heat up, as is the usual lately.  I even dressed slightly warmer than usual, which hasn't helped either.  Even with the day being about 28 F, mostly, so rather warm comparatively.  What I am doing isn't enough to keep me very well awake and aware.  I'll keep at it.

I didn't wake until late.  But ducks and rabbits were tended immediately.  As well, I have been out to check on their water since.  It was all good.  At least a few hours ago.  I may put fresh out shortly, then pull then when I shut the ducks up for the night.  The rabbits take turns eating more, or more quickly, or less.  Though there are a few groups which always tend to eat more or less, most are variable.

I only had one bowl of oyster stew last night.  I was a bit nervous about my process, so only used one of the doses of oyster.  Which means more tonight!  Oh, and while eating it, I did think about it.  The oysters themselves?  They are... okay.  Not my absolute favorite.  What I really do enjoy is the liquids... milk, cream, and oyster stuff.  Well, and butter.  I do like the stew flavor, if the oysters themselves are only so-so.  I do enjoy them raw much more.  Crazy but true... iced though, but definitely with the juice itself, and lemon or lime, though plain isn't horrible.  Cooked?  They can get a bit tough.  Another batch of that stuff, coming up.  Though I will add salt.  It really does need some.  All else was good about my process.

I may be able to get to bed early.  Oh... someone suggested a video.  That video suggested that, when reaching ketosis, insomnia is a common symptom, side effect, choose your term.  Fair enough.  Although I think, with my splurge, I probably kicked out of ketosis.  Even volume can do that, if this wasn't all of the problem.  Though, another part of my problem, might be dropping out, then kicking back into, ketosis too quickly.

At this point, my body goes into keto fairly quickly.  Then, as I'm getting the flu etc symptoms, I drop out.  Which... has it's own problems.  Kicking back and forth, as I go into and off of the system, leaves me fairly vulnerable.  I need an even keel, but can't seem to find or maintain one on my own.  So... just like dropping of doctor prescribed medicine, dropping off healthy eating can really do a number on me.  Ugh.  But, yes, I am pretty sure that is part of the problem currently.  Now that ribs are... pretty much healed.  I think that last time I disturbed them, they reset really quickly.  It is like they needed to be hurt in order to finish healing?  I am wondering.  I was able to move bags of feed fairly easily the other day.  I have to move some of them, again, soon.  So will know more.  But I think... the ribs are good finally.

Oh, and a call with my brother!  A good call.  I... wasn't sure we would ever speak again.  It... isn't my issue.  I am not exactly sure what his problems were.  He never said.  They remain, but... we got through this call.  Politics is part of it.  The past, for his part, is part of it.  There are a few other things, but from his side, not mine.  I played my part, then, but have since let go.  We shouldn't even discuss politics though.  Probably not religion either.  Or his family.  Or the past.  Not for my part.  Still, it was a good call.  And... he... impressed me with a choice.  It will remain private, but I am well pleased.

Later.  Probably.

Aha! I figured out thickening.

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Not for tonight, but for the other soup.  Adding pigs feet, tripe, even chicken feet... plus of course homemade stock.  Those, in parts or combined, will release gelatin and else, plus fats, which thicken like nothing else can do.  Those will, probably, be best cooked first, then removed... or the fluid ladled out... then begin with the actual edibles.  Yes, I have been looking.  As well, I found an excellent recipe for keto sweet and sour soup.  Oh I love that.

Never did get to gaming.  I will game, just a bit, before bedtime.  Good night, sweet dreams, see you next year?  Aye... one way or another.  Cheers. 

Happy New Year!

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Well, as close, or nearly, as I am going to get.

I let the ducks in, and shut them down.  Had to chase the whole lot of them in.  Chase?  Hmm.  Slow walk them in.  Then waterers were pulled.  They hadn't frozen, and were mostly empty.  Very good.

I will play a game for a bit, then have oyster stew.  I do enjoy that, mostly.  Though it may more be the butter and tradition than actual flavor?  I'll know more in a bit.  I always think I am going to really enjoy, but rarely do.  Still, I will eat them every other or every third year, more often if I could keep my mind focused.  I have so few traditions that I need to keep the ones I have... when I can.  It was either that or chili.  And, chili, mostly, is off limits.  I suppose once a year... yea.  Next year, one for one eve, the other for the next eve.

So pleased to start with groceries on hand, and food for critters, plenty for the next few months.  The trick is to buy when it is about at half.  I'd like to do price checking, but... that's not how feed works.  Tomorrow I will begin working on a serious meat and vegetable stew, thickened with psyllium husk and/or gum of guar?  Some such.  An actual natural product, used for keto thickening.  The trick is to find out how much to use.  And it will be hot, though not sweet.  I wonder if there is a keto sweet and hot recipe.  That is about the only oriental food I miss.  The soup... minus tofu.  Hmm, might try some of that in the oyster soup... to try to make it more stewlike... since I won't be using soup crackers.  Worth a shot.

Anyway.  Happy New Year.  Enjoy.  Maybe we will see each other tomorrow.  Good evening and night.

Out!

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I... didn't know if I could.  I... wasn't sure there would be money.  Still, in spite of all my fears, doubts, and else, I got in my vehicle and headed into town.  Groceries.  I've been living on dirt for far too long.  No, I wanted food.  I had to check my account first.  You... never know.  All good.  It was in.  I had gassed up last time I was out, so all good that way.  I pulled just a few dollars, so I have something more than a five and some ones, if not much more.  Then to the store.

Groceries.  Sure, everyone (else) is masked up.  I just smile.  I don't think they are afraid of china flu, they believe Biden won.  They expect the crackdown.  Even those who would like to believe otherwise, nominally like me, don't believe Trump will carry through.  They wear masks out of dejection and a failure of leadership?  I have seen nothing indicating, historically or presentationally, that Trump will do it.  And, yet, I... actually have one last hope.

I know that if he fails to secure the US vote, that is that.  It means... bad things.  Worse things.  Either way, I won't wear the mask.  As was actually thanked for it... for not wearing the mask.  All I said was... "Any day"!  *grins*  I simply will not follow the herd.  Especially one which is cowed by fear.  Of this or that.  I looked upon them with... sympathy.  For I know no empathy for such.

Shopping!  There was no kale, but cabbage will do.  Mushrooms, mixed stew vegetables, celery stalks, and more.  It should make for a very pleasant stew.  I will just use the chipped pork butt meat.  I have sixteen ounces of beef stock ready.  Not much prep, really.  The vegetables are prepped, mostly.  Could be smaller?  Celery is by the stalk but needs sliced.  Meat is cooked.  Mushrooms are sliced.  I simply need to put it together.  And, actually, I will be using reverse osmosis water for this.

Not tonight.  A tradition, as much as we had one, was oyster on either Christmas even or New Year's Eve.  It's New Year's Eve this year.  As I was checking out, I realized I had no milk or cream.  While I have restarted that, it doesn't begin until next week.  I had enough that I could get back and grab milk and cream, being back just in time to add it to the last items.  What a rush.  So, that for tonight... sans soup crackers.  But... all good.

I have checked the rabbit waterers several times today.  It is warmer, but... not perfectly.  I was able to reset their water once, had to change it the next time, then reset it when returning home from the store.  Happy little critters.  As well, on the way home, I stopped and picked up four rabbit food bags, and five duck feed bags.  I am hoping to also buy three more metal cans, perhaps four.  As feed storage.  Plus, perhaps, a few more waterers.  Just a few a month, say four, until I have enough to change them out up to three times a day, for two days.  They will need the water in the summer, constantly.  Probably need it now, but the cold and my real limits only allow what I can offer... three to four chances at water per days, during the day... or whatever passes for my day.  They are helping me keep on track, for now.

Next month I may buy the duck pellets.  I bought the loose stuff, mostly meat feeder stuff, this month.  A few more cans, a few bags of that stuff, and then I feel more secure.  Just incase things, businesses, money, come to a screeching halt.  I want to have a month or two extra feed.  If it all goes to hell, I have time to butcher.  I don't want them to starve.

All good.  A very good day.  I am hoping to do a bit of work in the bathroom, and clean some counters.  Plus the last of the chores... putting ducks up and pulling waterers.  Later.

Late but at it.

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To bed past 01:15.  Perhaps as much as an half hour later.  Somewhere in there.  Still, fighting to get to bed earlier.  And... that is earlier.  Insomnia calls me, like a wisp in the forest, drawing me into a land where sleep and wakefulness are banished, only gray skies, muted sounds, shadows, and suspicion lives.  I resist, as I may.  Forcing myself to bed before I venture too far into to that forest to find my way out.  It takes care, when being drawn in so seemingly sweetly.

I woke, the first time, just before the eight alarm.  In time to shut it down before it went off.  I would have just disturbed, not awaken.  I was hoping for the ten alarm.  Then, the mower-plow was kicked over.  That... helped... somehow.  Then, finally, and about twenty to ten, I was able to kick out.  This is normally about when I start chores, so... I just got right into it.

Oh, but I started out dressing rightly first thing.  It does help one to feel human.  But it isn't feasible without a clean body.  Anyway, dressed, and down to it.  The neighbor was back, after I finished the ducks and while preparing for the rabbits.  So we spoke just a bit.  He had to be tested for covid, recently.  He had cold features, it was required to return to work.  Checked out, for whatever that means with their terrible testing.  Though, I didn't think covid had anything to do with cold symptoms?  Then again, I'm not sure there really is anything but the flu... being called covid.  Death rates are just lower... with covid.

I checked to temp, before going back to the chores.  It is 22!  Warm wave.  I mean it.  This is so much better.  It must have... warmed... sometime in the night.  As the duck pond, which I forgot to empty, only had a thinner sheet of ice... an inch perhaps, versus three to four inches of late.  Very nice.  Even the ducks are in a better mood for it.  The rabbits don't... emote a great deal.

Now, as to rabbits.  I finally have their feeding down.  Will they ask for more?  Always.  But I have their amounts pegged.  I do give an ounce more, per animal, but that's it.  Save for the mini does.  I probably give them a couple ounces extra.  They just... seem to need.  So be it.  Further, I have decided to clear some of the minis.  I would like to keep four, two bucks and two does, for breeding.  Which leaves two of each to be culled.  It's merely a matter of sorting out their dispatching.  Cleaning isn't so difficult.  Butchering them is probably easier than doing a chicken.  They are older, but not too much older.  Then again, I may wish to hold off until I am sure they can/do breed and produce.  At this point, this exact breed is irreplaceable, and I really don't want mixed breeds.  So... a while longer, if I best get started with husbandry.

As for ducks, I am waiting until they produce, or figuring out how to get them to produce.  No eggs, which leads me to suspect they are eating their own eggs... which means obtaining stone "eggs".  And, perhaps, creating nesting areas for the hens.  I can't cull until they are producing.  It's... akin to eating the seed corn, a survival dependent act of desperation.  At least with these, though, if there is a duckopalypse, I can get more.

Well.  Today?  Calls, dishes, counters, bathroom?  That is the idea... I need to wake, more, first.  Just because I was able to kick out chores first thing... which is a bit of luck anyway... doesn't mean I was at all ready for the day.  I need... to... wake, more fully.  Grasp the world, work my way out of bed in the mind rightly.  Then I'll get to it.  Later.

Cold just reached a new low.

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The thermometer says it is 14 F, or so.  Well, and that it is.  However, even with dry hands, touching metal right now causes the skin and metal to merge.  Something different about this cold.  And, it seemed to be snowing.  There may or may not be actual snow in there.  It may just be frozen air.  Seriously, there is something very different.  Humidity is reading 24%, indoors.  I am betting it is below that out there.  Which is why even the very mild dampness of skin sticks to metal.

Everything has a frost to it, that is outside.  I forgot the mostly empty feed bucket out there.  Even the feed had hoary frost on it!  Something unusual is happening.  I would not wish to find myself out in that for long at all, without serious preps.  Warm clothes, fire-starting equipment, and a strong penchant for prayer.  It is one of the spookiest cold events I have seen... at least here.  This is, pretty much, a warm spell in Iowa... or used to be.  Seriously.  A -40 in Iowa was pretty common, and I have been through a two month session where the highest in that period and a bit more was negative twenty.... as the highest temperature for over two months, perhaps closing on three months.  Still, this is different.  Iowa was never dry, not like this, unless it was much much colder.

The ducks and rabbits seem okay.  The ducks are keeping their water open, which probably means they have been swimming.  Other than that, all seems okay.  The rabbits, too, seem okay.  The littler ones have four to a cage, so can cuddle if all else fails.  I did try to get their waterers to work, but the freezing was just too strong, so I replaced their waterers.  I may do so again, as cold as it is.  So have reset the waterers I brought in... just letting them warm.  Oh, and I closed their tarps down, as if for night setting.  Hopefully to allow them to stay warmer.  Brutal out there.

I got a shower.  Finished chores.  Finished laundry.  I should set up dishes, and perhaps get ready to clear and clean more counter space and get trash and recycling ready.  Ugh.  So cold, so tired.  I do have the heat up, it just isn't mattering in this weird spell.  Hmm, perhaps something to eat would help.  What could I mix some of the pulled pork with?  I'll have to check.  I am sure there is something to go with it.  Doesn't have to be fancy.  Later.

Down late, up late.

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A sort of gravity thing.  Even so, I am up, proportionally earlier.  Down at 02:30, perhaps later... that was the last time I saw.  Up by 10:00, actually a bit earlier... fifteen to an half hour earlier.  So, only seven hours down.  Still, it's an uncomfortably wake.  I don't feel at all good, or about it.  But it is time.  I need to get feed and water going.

On the good side, that massive headache which has been a plague was tempered by aspirin last night.  It has been a suffering something awful, all by itself, for days.  The ibuprofen did nothing.  Ignoring it did nothing.  I took another handful today.  It isn't as bad, sleep was painless unlike since it started, but at waking it... is back... coming back.  It is lighter but I am so very tired of being that pained.  I will try aspirin again.  I try to go without, but sometimes the need is greater than the want.

Strange dreams, but they dissipated with the sun.  In part because I was too tired when I went to bed, and when I woke.  Other dreams, remembered, recently, but not important.  Not all that interesting either.  Sharing a cab with a worldly man, while trying to track down... where I used to be, where I lived for a while, given inheritance of a place I used to know, reside within.  I just couldn't remember, and he was just interested in business, so we had to take turns calling locations.  It... might mean something to some of you.  And I see some things in it.  But just... personal things.

A shower, first thing, this morning.  I did get the port shredded, bagged, and refrigerated last night!  It was the last thing done.  It was pleasing to watch as it was done and stowed.  Now, to craft a barbeque sauce for it.  As well, laundry was all done, and the last load put in the dryer, at least the first time.  I'll need to do a morning dose on it, to shake out any remaining moisture.

A trim before the shower.  A shave after?  Hopefully.  Then chores.  Gaming as a rest period thing, work as I am able, and keeping up on the waterers.  It's cold out there.  I'll bet it's just as cold as yesterday.  It was down to 50 upstairs?  Weird.  I haven't checked outdoors yet.  Chores, a few business calls, a familial call, and cleaning in the bathroom and kitchen to begin.  Yes.  That's the plan.

Ugh, but I feel so wretched.  Nausea... light, headache, a general worn feel, tossed in with a vague ill sense.  I'll figure it out and try to get to it anyway.  Good morning and day.

Way too late.

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So be it.  Some nights just... drag.  I can neither sleep nor work nor play.  So... I... get lost.

It must be a trick?  I don't know.  I just feel like... well...

No worries.  I'll do what I may, as I am able.  It'll work.  Good night... if I still have a bit to do.

A strange day.

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Bits done.  No business, today.  Tomorrow, I must.  Laundry was run through, two loads.  Chores, and keeping up on water.  I missed a bit, and it was all frozen, so new waterers.  These the bunnies used to completion, or close.  Food is all gone, save the little guys.  Sometimes they eat more, sometimes less.  Today it was much less.  I check, to make sure food hasn't gotten stuck in the chute.  So it isn't that.

I also grilled chops, then put a pork roast on for a low, slow, cook.  I understand why they use barbeque sauce, pork can sometimes be just a bit bitter.  I may work a sauce up tomorrow.  I have keto ketchup.  With a bit of work, some of that can be turned into a sauce.  Hot, vinegary or not, thicker or thinner, hotter or mild, etc... whichever way I want to go with it.  Then, try some keto buns, perhaps a fathead dough sort?  I've been wanting to try these things.  I am planning on shredding the pork.  This is the first time I dared leave it long enough that it is literally falling off the bone, and apart.  It is tasty, but as mentioned, slightly bitter.  I hope the sauce helps with that.

Funny thing is, I handled the cold quite well today.  I mean extremely well.  Before I was awake enough to realize what I was doing, I was out doing chores.  I had meant to take a shower first thing (which I still plan to do as well tonight).  But hadn't gotten to it.  So?  So I went out without any socks on.  Or even a second layer under my pj's.  Or third, as I often do.  And, yea, it was about 2 F out there this morning.  I never did, obviously, get to the shower, or put socks on.  Didn't need them?  Apparently not.  The several more times I was out for chores, and while setting up the grill then checking the food, I was out without socks.  Just flip-flops, if of the sideways band sort.  Hmm... imagine that.  I AM still an ogre, or bear, or giant of a milder size.  Not all dead, or too old, yet.

I thought that might be due to blood sugar?  I just checked... fifteen minutes after eating between half and a pound of grilled pork roast, it read 144.  So... no, I don't think so.  No... I... haven't been taking insulin, either.  Odd, that.  I... just... got lost in things.  Still, I actually should get back on my heart medicine.  That really is becoming... spooky.  Yes, I have a very strange anatomy.  I guess I really have been eating less.  I think a few hundred calories a day for... well... a while... and a while before the last bigger meal I had, even two or three of the last bigger meals I have had.  I'm not hungry, or thirsty, even when I am.  *shrug*

Well... I best get to some things.  Good evening and night.

The headache remains.

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Not so bad as last night.  And I am moving slowly to keep it that way.  I'll take a few aspirin this morning.  Actually, it was ibuprofen which was consumed last night.  I thought it might be due to inflammation, as the back of my neck was sore, and likely the source.  Didn't even touch it.  So, aspirin this morning.  Not  quite getting nauseous from it, but close.  Still, with meats thawed, I'm thinking breakfast before long... a pork chop and eggs, with a side of... nothing, actually.  Still, that should be good.

I went to fill the duck pond this morning.  Something got to the hose, chewed one end all to bits.  I am guessing it was a deer or cow looking for water.  They know hoses, apparently.  I had to find another hose.  While it was the shortest lightest one I could find, it is too heavy.  I will use it for now, replace it with a twenty five footer as soon as possible.

While it is cold out, just as cold as yesterday morning, with the sun up and out, it feels a lot better.  Or I'm just in better shape?  I had no trouble doing all of the chores, all at once, only going in once to grab rabbit food and waterers without spending any time warming.  The rabbits are doing well.  The mini does are the most skittish creatures I have.  The ducks, even the younglings, are less frightened of me.  I suppose size and other limits leave them no choice.

I have set up laundry, but am waiting to get a shower in to start those.  Then I'll set up dishes, perhaps making a pan of water to begin clearing the kitchen counters off and then cleaning those.  A few phone calls today?  Yea.  A bit of business, a bit of medicine...  I will.  I will get to it.  already started.  Further, I'm not getting back into pj's.  I'll dress proper, and feel like an adult.  Just for today?  I'd like to do it for a week, and begin taking some of my life back.

The week is back to getting my home in order for... well... you will see or you won't.  Never can tell exactly how things will work out.  Mysterious ways.  Good morning and day.

Massive headache.

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I am still awake for it.  Took aspirin a bit ago, to no good.  I'll just have to go to bed as is.

I finished with the rabbits and ducks just a bit ago.  I guess I lost track, while hoping the aspirin would work.  It's been hours.  Just lost time.  The rabbits ended up drinking most of the water, somehow.  It has gotten colder, again, in steps.  It is now at 5, down from 12, down from 17 as a high.  I emptied the duck pond, grabbed the waterers, and got in as quickly as possible.

I did have a dinner.  I am wondering if the headache is from not having eaten in a bit too long.  Well, not nearly enough.  A few hundred calories a day is bad for the carburater.  I haven't even been drinking much, down to as little as an half gallon, or even have that on leaner days.  Just no gumption to get it.  Not thirsty.  A very strange thing, for me to be off my feedbag.  Or the headache is a symptom of what might be causing me to be off my feed?

I have more meats thawing.  I should be back to food.  I found beef stock, which I am hoping to turn into a stew of some sort before too long.  It'll work with chicken thigh meat and veggies.  Though I would rather have a roast of some sort.  Which is something thawing, rather than thighs anyway.  I simply need to get fresh mushrooms, cabbage, carrots, and maybe a few other things.  No potatoes... this time... perhaps a try at broccoli or cauliflower?  Maybe.  I want it very vegetal and yet very meaty too.  And thick.  Perhaps with some decent spice to it, hot spice.  I am getting closer to dipping my toes into soups and stews.  Why so afraid?  My efforts, to date, have been absolute failures.  I'll... find a solid recipe.  Go that way.

Good night. 

A last watering.

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I caught them just as, or just before, they froze up.  Shaking and just a bit else, and flow was returned... for a while.  They all seem to have fed well.  Drinking has been a bit shy, if there are limits to availability.  I opened the water for the ducks, and checked their food.  All good.  There is a light layer of freeze on top, nothing the ducks can't break through.  Still, I do it for them, then stir it all.  It keeps it more open for them.

As I finished, I checked the temperature.  It is back down to 12.  What of a sun we had today is going back down.  If it isn't dark out, it will be in half an hour at most.  We did get a very little bit of heat from it, I'll take what I can get.  I'll bet it is going to be another very cold night.  I best empty the duck pond while collecting the waterers.  I can't wait for summer, at least for the watering part.  I shouldn't have trouble with overheating, not with them mostly in the shade, and many bottles of frozen water to offer.  Enough bottles for two a day, per rabbit, if needs be.  A sprinkler on a timer might not be horrible either?

Oh, finally cleared the freezer, and pulled meat.  It has been a long time since I have had a passable meal.  I have several meats thawing, one on the faster track... hopefully for dinner in two hours.  One hour to thaw, one to absorb salt, then set the grill an half hour through the salting process.  It's how I do.  Well, and a can of veggies, with butter.  Peas, corn, green beans, beats?  Maybe a mix of two.  Yea.  I... could sure use a bite.

Later.  Maybe good night already.  Not sure.

Still quite chill out there.

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With it being so cold, I have been checking the waterers every few hours.  I changed the nipples, and shook them up, last time.  They drank happily after.  This time the whole bottles needed changing out.  They were pretty much frozen from the nipple to an half inch around the outer parts of the bottles.  Fresh, warm, waterers were put out.  I will check on those in a few hours.

It is up to 17 F.  Perhaps these will last longer.  I will check in a few hours again.  But that is that.  I may have to change the nipples, they freeze fairly quickly.  Though, being warmer, and with fresh warm water, they may be pretty good yet.  One last insurance of access to water, then I'll call it that.  Leave them too it until the ducks are to be put up, then just pull the waterers.

Oh, the mini does haven't been eating hay, they just pulled it out and threw it down.  Hmm?  I suppose, like real women, who do the same with toilet paper?  It's... a wiring issue in the female brain.  *sigh*  *laughs*  But they really do eat the most, per rabbit, per pound, of all my critters.  And they drink the most!  It... must be a perpetual bachelorette party?  Ha!  And it well might be.

Even dressed well, and with gloves, a hat, and handling warm waterers, it was a very hard cold out there.  I couldn't tell the difference between seventeen and zero.  If I think there is more of a breeze going currently.  The valley is breathing, and it's noticeable.  Still, I'd rather winter than summer, if spring and fall are becoming my more favored... when they behave as one should expect.

I really have to get to some things, but am so tired.  I'm not sure how to get to them!  I will try.  Later.

So very cold, and dark.

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I finished chores.  Had to come inside and take minor breaks.  It is zero, 0, F, again.  Time is my enemy in that.  I used to be able to handle zero fairly well, even as mentioned down to -20 F, even -40 on a good bad day.  Age wins the day, I guess.  That is with gloves and extra layers and winter boots!  How did I do that when I was even a few years younger?  Crazy.

The mini does have gone through a whole second batch of timothy hay, while the gents have only gone through about half a similar amount.  The other rabbits haven't finished a quarter of that.  Okay.  Most were thirstier than hungry.  I did minor adjustments, up or down, today.  I'll leave it at these amounts for the next week.  Then check and possibly adjust again.

Glad I tipped the duck pond last night.  It would have been frozen solid, as the level was down, and it was so cold.  The ducks really didn't want to leave this early.  Funny thing.  Still, I opened it up, and they... seemingly more by habit, came streaming out.  All were happy to see fresh water.  Even as cold as that water might seem, if it is above freezing?  It is warmer than the air.  It is also above 32 F, or it would be ice.  To them, that is warm.  Splash!  Quack!  I'll... bet their balls are on the inside!  :p

After that, I started failing.  Cloudy to near dark, that cold, and just because.  I went down at around 10:00.  It felt like I slept for hours and hours.  Waking just now, at 11:12, I am thinking of going back to bed?  Maybe not.  I will do a quick check on the waterers, make sure they are flowing.  And, perhaps, check the temp.  It may have risen, the sun seems be out or trying to get out.  It was 61 upstairs.  I suppose, with that branch gone, even modest sunlight really heats the place.  This summer will be brutal though.  That branch covered the length of my roof, and probably twenty to thirty feet of breadth, no more than five to ten feet above it.  Warmer in the winter, but absolutely brutal in the summer, more than ever before.  Ugh.

I'd best figure out something to eat.  The cold really uses juice.  Stay warm, dry, and fed, if possible.  If not, find some tune to whistle while you work if you must.  Auf Viederschreiben.

Better without improvement?

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Mostly.  I didn't make it down as early as hoped, but I did get down well before midnight.  I was in bed by between 21:30 and 22:30, more middling if I had to lay odds.  I woke, initially, at 04:00, exactly.  Turned off the fan, as that will keep me under, then went back to sleep.  It seemed like hours, but I woke at 05:00 exactly... for the second and final time.  I pretty much just got up then.

Not quite ready for the day, but I want to be up.  I want to keep my day schedule.  I have been doing very well, for a while now.  It helps me feed the critters on a more regular schedule, if more based on sunrise than an some random hour.  I am not sure if that is good enough, but it is the best I can do, when I am going to be able to do it.

Colder than usual, upstairs.  At 53 or 55, it just... usually it stays 57 to 59.  Then again, in the north downstairs bedroom, I often slept with the window open.  But that was before I found that a fan worked just as well... probably better... without making it nearly so cold.  It made waking easier.  I'm not sure why it was so cold tonight.  Usually, the fan makes it warmer, driving it as high as 61.  Oh well.

Same plans as before.  Nothing extra has been done.  If I could just shake exhaustion off my shoulders, wake, and do.  I'd do what I could.  Time and health have me by the balls, and winter is piling on.  Nothing unusual.  And, for as much as it pains me to be awake, being awake is mostly an improvement.  While I am awake, and aware enough, to suffer... I would rather suffer my life through, than sleep it off.  It's just how I would prefer.  Haven't always had the choice.

Well... about time to do my morning routines.  The cats have had a snack.  I will set the alarm for two hours, then... try something new.  Good morning and day.

Some days, checking on the critters is extra good.

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It is a pleasant day, for winter.  At about 28, it actually feels pretty good.  The sun was out, and made it warmer... or at least it seemed warmer.  I have checked on the furry and fowl twice now, as much to see the sun and to make sure all was well.  Feed is good.  Only the mini ladies needed more water.  All are good with food, if some are out.  

The ducks are having a meeting, and seem to enjoy being under the rabbits.  I'm always suspicious about things falling down.  But the ducks don't seem to mind, either knowing where to not be, or not caring?    So be it.  Their water is easily staying open, though I will drain it tonight.  It's been two days.  Refilling it in the morning.  All is well.

Oh, the mini girls went through their hay like it was cotton candy, yesterday.  And I think again today.  I just kept filling it.  This last batch has not been touched.  The mini bucks went through one batch over two days.  I refilled it, as well, but they haven't touched this second batch.  I added fodder in, lightly, to the rest of the cages.  They have eaten between half and three quarters of what was given.  I'd like to get the mangers on for them, but I'm just not doing well.

I'll pull the water when the ducks go in, and try to get to bed about that time as well.  I'll like to get them in around 18:00~18:30.  Might have to steer them in.  They might not go.  Will see.  So tired.  Doing well otherwise.  Gaming, mostly, today.  It's all good.  Hmm... maybe a phone call?  Later. 

Good morning!

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Just... a good morning.  For no good or bad reason.  I didn't get to bed until midnight, woke at 08:00 or very close one way or the... well... must have been an half hour after... looking at the clock.  Still, all good.  Got stuck waiting on the ducks to go in, had to herd to groups in, even then.  Then, being 21:00, I missed my window of bedtime, didn't see the problem, and almost killed my day schedule.  We will see.  I think I am going to be a bit more forceful with the ducks.  There are limits, but there... are limits both ways.  Be of good respair, I tell you.

I turned up the heat, first thing.  I have the alarm set for an hour, to begin with chores.  Wearing gloves and my slip-on winter boots makes tending the critters a bit easier even when it is very cold.  I save any wetwork for a final project.  As that just gets me, no matter what.  And the gloves can't be worn, and wouldn't help much, in the water.

I almost have a pattern...  Start the water in the duck pond, if that is happening.  Then feed and water the rabbits.  Then let the ducks out, and grab their pans.  I keep those in with them, as it could rain or snow overnight, and things tend to munch on their food if left out... a roaming cow, deer, and mice, are known thiefs.  Though other birds may munch?  Inside, the only thing that might get food is mice.  But if the muscovys find them, they will eat them.  If even the indian runners will kill them if they happen to notice.  Then, alive or dead, the muscovys would eat them.  I like muscovys.  Like both types, actually.

I've already snacked the girls... right in the face, I tell them.  They still seem hungry!  Or is Sam just wanting attention?  I didn't let them sleep with me last night.  I needed sleep, not face tickles, head butts, and body walks.  So, maybe it is just attention.  Sam is... nearing her end, soaking up as much of my time, love, and patience as she can gather.  I get that.  But, sometimes...  "Don't... touch me!"  Man, sometimes I just need some space.

Well, on to espying the web.  Good morning, day, and Sunday.  If you are going to church, say a little prayer for me.  Just to let God know He is always on my mind.  Literally.  Not like He doesn't know, just... He likes hearing it from second-hand sources.  It would be a favor to both of us, in His eyes, I do believe.  Have a great day.  Stay warm, dry, and fed... as possible.