Up for a bit.

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Jasmine was tied out, fed, and watered.  The cats as well.  A fatted coffee was finally enjoyed, while setting up reverse osmosis and filling any empty water jugs around.  Cold.  So I dressed more warmly.

Sleep was mostly good.  But the cold creeps in.  I have mostly been able to keep that at bay.  Still, it disturbs as it tries to eat the life from me.  I forgot to take meds.  Will get to it when next I am up.

I did have toasted keto bread and jam.  Nice.  Not at all fancy,  but good enough.  A handful of walnuts as well.  I'll have kefir when next I am up.  And reset the kefir in the jars.

Not perfect, but not bad.  Back to bed, sleep, after reading and listening to music for a bit.  Good day, and night again.

Two days up and out.

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Business tended, shopping, some medical.  Five stops each day, or more.  Not all successful, but mostly and I learned what to do about the failures.  Had been meaning to have these things started Monday, done by Tuesday or Wednesday.  But brutal hurts and terrible exhaustion crippled me too severely.

Warmer, sleeping and awake, the last three days.  But as I finished, exhaustion is making it difficult to be, stay, get warm.  Not frigid, or cold, yet.  Just this side of that.  With a poor outlook, if I don't tend things rigorously.  Though, even then?

Almost there.

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The left foot still aches.  Not as severely, often, or deeply.  I have been able to keep it warmer, mostly.  Last evening wasn't great, but better than a few days to months ago.  Warm, as I slept today.  Almost too warm, toward the end.  But I'll take that well before having them slightly cold.  Frigid feet are way out.

Pulled beef tacos.  Water.  Medicine.  I checked bp first.  Being more moderate, I took half the dose of carvedilol.  Glad I checked.  It would have crashed on full dose.  Now, full current dose is half what it had been.

Stupid bp!

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I was able to wake today, again.  Up around noon.  Medicine, food, and I had hoped some work.  After eating, after medicine, I... couldn't stand?  Lighter but definite tunnel vision.  No stars, in my vision, but right next to it.

I had checked blood sugar.  It was 100 this morning.  BP?  So I checked that.  It is 89/68, with a 70 pulse.  Ugh.  That is the problem.  I tried to figure a way through.  Having just taken meds, there is no way back, until the stuff works through my system.

Mom suggested a little fresh air.  I had a business call to make anyway, so I took the advice.  It didn't help, but it didn't hurt either.  And I made the call.  Like a butterfly, pinned to corkboard.  No pain, but no ability to be mobile.

Back to bed.  I hate to do it, no choice.  Hoping to be up later, finish with curtain rod installations, and sheer rods too.  I will check my bp before taking meds again.  Usually, if it's been a few days off meds, my bp is a bit high and sticks high.  This is... odd.  Oh well.

Back on to sleep.  Later.

Slept through a few days.

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No real choice.  Just woke a few hours ago.  Fed the cats.  Am gaming a bit.  Having water.  Missed meds.  Didn't help that mom was waiting down here, like a shark, with fifteen things to do, half not even on the list.  No.  There were things I wanted to do.  She was blocking my list with her list.  I wasn't sure I could do my stuff.  Certainly not with her trying to bend my ear.  So I just rested, slept.

Blood sugar improved.  It was 84.  Fasting doesn't always help.  This time it did.  Not having coffee, though, either.  Or meds or food.  I did have water up there.  Not much, finished it.  Should get water pills in though.  I have been trying not to drink at night, but being up there a few days... fluid is good.  I'll put more up there but limit usage, and to only when I sleep over a day or two.  Hmm... might get a medicine book folled and up there, in case I don't make it down for a bit.

Coffee and medicine shortly.  Maybe sorting something to eat.  A shower would be good.  So cold!  I turned the heat up a bit, when I woke.  Letting the bathroom warm.

At things tomorrow... or today actually?  I need to hit some things.  Later.

Up for a bit.

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Trying to switch days and nights back to normal, or expected, sleep and wake cycles.  If nothing else, to get morning medicine in, all of it, then do small parts of lists of work.  Doing both, lately.  Gaming too.  Just bits, here and there.

But so tited I haven't been able to stay awake long.  Today is no different.  But I did wake for a bit, did do a few tasks, and took medicine.  Spoke with mother, advised her on a few things, was there for a tele medicine call.  Got Jasmine out, fed the cats, and a few other things.

Better over better.

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I can usually walk without more than a slight limp and mild pain.  My torso has started hurting, mildly.  Not organs, just general pains, like after doing windsprints after a summer off.  The headache which developed over a few days, a new and different symptom, seems to have passed.

I did a few minor tasks for mother today.  Waking early, but going on back to bed early.  Then getting up for supper.  Doing a few more jobs.  Plus, keeping up on water and ice, rotating and checking kefir, and making plans for a bit of work each day going forward.

Better, if still rough.

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Wasn't able to sleep as warmly as yesterday and the day before.  But I wasn't bitterly cold either.  As well, I was able to get a decent bit of sleep in, if not as much as I had hoped.  Pains returned, internal.  In the torso.  And the feet were still slightly pained.  Better, though.

I am improving, slowly, incrementally, and with occassional hiccups.  Three steps forward, with a step back here and there.  A bit frustrating, but better than the doldrums of suffering I had known oh too well for far too long.

My feet are murder!

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Did I break them, fracture them, or are they somply not getting enough blood flow, so hurting from the cold?  A mixture of a few of those things?  Walking on them is a horror.  The knuckles, of both feet, ache... that without any weight applied.  Up on them, I end trying to walk on the outer sides of my feet, for the terrible pains.  Not possible, fully, in shoes.

I have been sleeping cold, no matter what I have done.  My feet and lower legs the coldest of all.  I tried a nightcap, literal, not a consumable, tonight.  Not sure if that was a good call, or just a rare warm natural sleep.  Will try it again.

A few problems being worked.

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The checks, sent to closed accounts, were... problematic.  First, two of the five were sent to accounts which have been closed for years.  Second, all of them were dated in January.  But January 2025.  No good.

I called the title company, to zero effect.  Absolutely dogmatic.  We will only reissue the checks if you come to our office.  We will only cancel the two dead accounts if you can prove those accounts are paid in full, maybe.  Both of those accounts were paid off, and ended, years ago.  I have no proof, and no way to get it on two year dead accounts.

I called my bank.  They... helped.  Made it so if I voided and ripped the checks, took a picture, and texted that, that would work.  To the best of my knowledge that suceeded.  However, they will reissue, with the correct dates, but to the same accounts!

I was told to sinply send them to the accounts, then wait for a refund.  Fine.  So... now I just wait for the new checks.

Then I got a call from one of the construction companies.  It ISN'T on auto pay.  Wasn't.  A bit late, but not too late.  I was able to catch up, pay this month, then automate payments henceforth.  Now to check on the other construction bill.  Pay it up, if needed, and automate it too.  Ugh.

One thing at a time.  But getting there.  If I can get it all done, then I can really rest for a while.  Wasn't planning on working on these things until Monday.  But... just...  saw an opportunity and hopped on it.  Very nice.

My last pain, the left foot, did well last night.  But hurt hellalot again when I woke and got up today.  Still, the first solid non-paimful sleep in... weeks.  Painpills are helping.  But I can't, won't, dose daily.  So tomorrow and Sunday I must simply suffer.  Every third day I will dose, once.  It's how I do.

Oh.  I made cornish game hens the other day.  One for each of us.  Excellent, according to both of us.  My mother is impressed with how well I cook birds.  We each saved half our bird.  I made a chicken stew tonight.  It was excellent.  Mom made ice cream, but using a new recipe I sugested.  It didn't work.  The first recipe was flawless.  I may have a fix for it, will try later tonight or tomorrow.

If the heloc update finishes going through, I'll be able to get on the electrical updates and upgrades, and the electric and gas tankless water heaters.  As well, begin getting quotes for hvac needs and make connections for a concrete driveway, three new exterior doors and screen doors.  Oh, and getting the kitche flooring installed, and paneling in.  Ugh.  Double Ugh!

Spend, spend, spend.  But... living in a warmer, cleaner, better, safer home?  Okay.  It isn't even just for value addition, or sales potential, at this point.  It's about better quality of life.

An successful experiment.

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Fudge.  I found an "easy" recipe.  Chocolate chips, sweetened condensed milk, butter, vanilla, and salt.  Okay.  But I was almost certain that could be made in keto form.  Went looking.  Sure enough, one of my favored keto gals had both the sweetened condensed milk and fudge recipe, all together in one video.

Would it really work?  Would it really be keto?  Only one way to find out.  I had to buy chocolate chips, of the keto sort, too.  And, unsalted butter.

All done, then to it.  It took forty minutes, maybe ten to fifteen minutes more, to reduce the cream and butter, with powdered allulose, and two to four drops of liquid sucralose, to produce the sweetened condensed milk.  My dogs are still rough, so it was a painful challenge.  I need a tall chair, for cooking!  If my feet are going to be bad like this this often, for this long.  Ugh.

Still, I sweated through it.  Then added more butter and the chips.  At first, I didn't think that was going to work.  Patience, Grasshopper.  But my dogs were making patience a challenge.  Finally, after fifteen minutes, it started looking... possible.  Then vanilla, a few last stirs to swirl it all even.

In the pans, I added walnuts to most of it, and stirred those in, or pushed them down in.  Some left plain.

Poured into two 8" square glass baking dishes, with oiled parchment.  Then set to cool.  Liquid, still, after an hour?  Freezer!  It never did get to where it could be cut.  Spooned out.  After days in my very hard freezing freezer.

However, the taste was fantastic.  That is some of the best fudge I have eaten.  Was it keto, though?  I had serious doubts.  Mother quite liked it too.  We gobbled those dishes up in less than a week.  Some daily, more some days.  I refused to test my blood sugar, for fear.  Though, on the evening, after I ate my last portion... so last evening, I broke down and bit the bullet.

Blood sugar was 89!  A fluke?  Was the test strip old, too old?  It was the last in that pack.  So, this morning, with a fresh pack of test strips opened, I checked again.  It was 99.  Nice.  Thar HAS to be solid keto.  So rich, decadent, and yet didn't cause the mildest of glucose spikes.  And, it tastes like regular fudge.  Could not differentiate, and I am very discerning.

I still have the mats to make regular fudge, but I think I will toss that.  Or leave it for mom to use, in other things, just for herself.  If she really wants more fudge, I'll get more keto mats.  For me?  I am done with fudge for... another year or two, three maybe.

As to health?  Better.  Mostly needing sleep, to recover.  That broke me pretty hard.  My left foot remains in serious pain, but my right foot seems healed, mostly.  And my internals, from the illness to the biopsy, seem better.  Just... tired.  I was exhausted before I got sick and damaged.  Healing kept me from resting, even while resting.  Everything was going toward healing, not resting.  Maybe now I can begin catching up on sleep and such.  Or die.  ;p

Later.

Warmth.

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Socks, not even the thick wader/hunter socks, which go up even over my knees, was doing it.  I noticed some stick-on handwarmers, made for the feet.  Now... not all feet are created equally.  Having size 15 means it takes two patches on the bottoms, and one on the tops, to warm the stupid things.

The large wool socks help, once the patches begin warming.  Wouldn't mind a few higher up, say on the calf, and shin.  And, maybe, sometimes.  But worried about it getting too warm, and running out.  Even so, these are helping with healing.  Probably helping with circulation, which then helps with healing?  Maybe both, straight up.

Slowly improving.

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Colder out there.  Finally got to below freezing, for the high?  For a day or three.  Looks to be in the 40s this coming week.  Very strange, even for a la nina year.

My feet still hurt, and hurt the most.  But internals are still tighter than is comfortable, with recovery aches?  Or the remnants of what was wrong before the procedure.  I am wearing the robe on to bed to keep a slight fever.  Would have that, from time to time, anyway.  Without the robe, I would have chills on off times.  The maintained slight fever, I think, is helping me get better slightly faster.

Better on better.

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Far from well.  Half way back to humanity?  We'll see.  The internals are... better.  Less swollen, bloated, compressed, less blood in my urine.  Still some.  They suggested if there seemed to be too much blood, that I should go in.  The key, to me, was too much.  Well, and where.  No bleeding on my back, or bruising, infection.

As for urine, the first day there was a lot.  But I expected that.  Every time I have been hurt or else, internally, I have bled a goodly lot.  I can't say that is normal, only normal from me.  Hit by a vehicle, dropped a bit far, and some sorts of... unofficial repairs or surgery or surgery-like events.  Can't... remember all the deets.  Only that this is far from my first rodeo.  So I wasn't worried.  Expected blood in urine for longer.  At day three I would have started to worry, a bit.  Day four I would have seen about going in.  I can go pretty low on blood.  As low as 40%, initial loss, and run at 60% for... a while.  Though I was young and fully healthy, that mighg be pushing things these old ill dog days?

Better.

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For the moment, again.  As when I woke for supper, warm sleep had helped.  Though I woke a time earlier, after supper, in impressive agony.  Which surprised me.  I thought, from feeling so much better, at super, I was getting through to the better side.  Nope.  Each time I wake, it is better or worse, but in the better episodes I begins to fail quickly.  So that taking a few sips of water, tylenol if it is time, then jumping back to sleep to attempt escaping agony, seems the best.

I am surprised either the condition, or the procedure effects, continue to physically or otherwise, plague me so long.  Thankfully, I have the time and way to attempt to sleep it off.

Sleep helped.

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I was in such absolute misery.  I couldn'y get warm.  My feet hurt.  My wound hurt.  My insides felt bloated, bruised, and more.  I would call the sensation closer to absolute misery.  Worse, I couldn't escape it by sleeping.  It was simply too intense.

I got up for something.  This morning?  Time isn't, doesn't quite yet, make sense.  Just got up to get more electrolyte powder, vinegar, water, and tylenol.  Some of which to bring up.  I took four tylenol, but forgot extras.  About cried when I suffered down and up only to realize I had forgotten those.  I was terrified to make another trip any time soon.

Biopsy.

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I've never had one before.  Kidney, left this time.  I wasn't at all sure what to expect.  As well, I am still suffering from... whatever has recently been plaguing me, plus the simple mechanical pains and mobility issues caused by a fractured or broken big toe (or two, both hurt terribly).

Still, this had to get done.  Stall after delay after reset, if it killed me, I was going in.  Today.

Better.

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Probably temporary.  It seems that in early morning, for a while, my symptoms partially lift.  Still something of a stomach ache, minor feverishness, mild aches.  Just nothing crippling.  Mostly.  Still wouldn't be up for a marathon, or even heavy excercise.

Mother made supper.  Something I would easily eat.  A chuck roast in the crockpot.  But she added many vegetables.  No.  I am backing away from those.  I had to think about it.  I may have some meat, just no juices or veggies.  My week to month averages are all three below a hundred, for blood sugar.  My fasting read is 110, oddly.  With nothing but water for a day and a half.  And only one meal for the three days before that.  Meh, probably my metabolism pulling muscle for it's needs.

Still bad.

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A stomach ache, bad one, remains.  The fever too.  I am mostly mamaging the chills.  The dry mouth is difficult, but having water up here helps.  I think I need to bring up doses of electrolytes and vinegar somehow.  Those things help, slightly more than water alone.  Perhaps drinking flat, reverse osmossis water too, rather than carbonated water?

Aches, pains, exhaustion, muscle weakness and pains.  A very difficult time.  I have had worse, but this isn't close to good.

I was able to get up for a bit.  And will do so again, if just to bring Jasmine in, test hydration recipes, and let mom know I am alive.  Well, and show her how to get Jasmine in her cage.  It will be a very short run.

I am in serious trouble.  In some ways it is better, in some ways it is worse.  Later, or goodnight again most likely.

Not... out of the woods.

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Not quite yet.  I think the trees are thinning.  The parh is slightly easier.  But fever remains, muscle cramps... especially the legs, a continued stomach ache if milder, lungs are sore from the fever I think.  Little general aches too.  My joints, currently, aren't hurting though don't know if that is a short reprieve or if that part is better.

I did get up, had food and coffee, gamed, got Jasmine out, drank a lot of water, and am going back to bed.  What was hurting started to hurt more, fever and chills returned with vengeance, and my legs began giving out to cramps and exhaustion from just sitting.  Still, this is better.  Oh, and neck glands started to ache... like a sore throat, but not quite.

On to sleep.  Good night, day, whatnot.