The Final.

What can I say, it seemed to go smoothly. Though it was not a simple test, by any means, I believe I understood each question well enough to answer it correctly. I probably had my typical “math bad hair day”, missing a minus sign there, or 3 + x^3y –y^cos(z) mismatching, but I think I was strong with theory and practice, just missing in the little math detail. After the test, while waiting for my study partner, a group of us began to congregate and discuss the problems, the ones we were sure about and the ones we were not sure about. All I can say is that, from that too, I have a decent feeling about the test. My friend did not feel he did so well. I was unhappy about that, but I do believe he will pass and will do fine. I am pretty sure, depending on how poorly my simple math was, that I should be keeping my B. Knowing my penchant for math errors though, I doubt if anything in the test would convince the professor to offer me an A. It is better than I had hoped in the beginning. I had to try. And, I am pleased in some ways.

I was not able to try and register for classes today. I decided to study with my friend, and it did help. Just by accident, we were discussing a problem from homework (one of hundreds). He solved it, and I watched (it is one thing I cannot do, step-wise valuation from (x,y) to t, given a graph). If he had not done that, I would not have solved that problem on the test, it was the exact problem from the homework!). We actually did not work on homework problems, sticking to previous tests only for all of our finals study (except for that one problem, and that only incidentally as, while I was turning pages looking for the general form of something, I saw it, pointed it out as a difficult problem, and his mind works in such a way that he just does what he sees in some odd fashion!).

Now, to look forward to next semester. Oh, and take care of life between now and then. I did a little shopping tonight and had hoped to do more, soon. It looks like an ice storm is coming through, so I do not know if I will be able to get out tomorrow to finish grocery shopping and do some minor errands. I am not even nervous about the surgery, I am just looking forward to having straight toes. My left foot hurts a great deal, and often, more so than the right foot. That is part of the reason it goes first. Though, another consideration just happens to be that I will be on my own through this operation. And, I may need to do some driving. Though the grades will probably be posted Friday, I would like to take a look at the monster, which means a drive. As well, when my mother returns from the baby-sitting job I have sent her on as her Christmas gift, I will be driving up that way. I have not seem my Mum in a while, and I am getting a bit cranky about it. She is a one of a kind, and big as I am, I still cannot quite be as much of a big baby without her. Yea, I know, but I have finally come full circle to where I have accepted much which I had foresworn. I suppose that is part of why I became Catholic. Kneel, knave, and know your place… I think I heard that somehow. And, finally, appreciate it in more ways than one.

Hey, I might have discussed a woman in class, one I might have thought of as attractive, interesting, smart… Urhm, well… I realized I no longer had her email address, due to my computer problems. So, trying to figure out how to deal with that situation, I decided to ask her, preferably before class, for an email or phone number exchange. As it worked out, I could only do so as we were seated and right before the test was handed out. She finishes the tests (historically, and did so again) quickly, then leaves. In order to minimize any discomfort, I had written my email address on a piece of paper beforehand. She had her own idea, however, and asked if I wanted her email address instead, which of course I did. So, she wrote it down and gave it to me. Now, this was ostensibly merely to ask her about statistics (which I am interested in and she is heavy in that field). I swore to myself that was all it was about. However, my deep blush when trying to speak English in that little conversation in the presence of the rest of the class and my inability to do so coherently indicates to even my clueless man-self, that, perhaps, there is more. *sigh* Yeah, I know. What are clueless male types supposed to do? Anyway, she seemed pleasant and interested. And, she had one of the biggest smiles going on. I cannot be sure if she was laughing at me for being a fool, the situation, happy that I asked, or some mix thereof. Read the clueless part again. Still, it is done. Now to figure out how well I can get around, how soon, and then when and what to write. Yeah, buddy. And, no matter, I will always have that little memory of my foibles in calculus with a woman as a fun little moment to remember for years, perhaps decades.

As with women, my mother, and God, I am forced to kneel with ineptitude and just graciously accept their gifts, favors, and follies. I finally realize I do not need to understand. More, I will never be able to understand. It is freeing, if still a little vexing.