Dreams.

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Three to be precise.  The first was totally different, the next two were... associated.
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In the first dream, according to remembered chronology, a woman came to stay with me.  She was a refugee from some part of Europe, say Poland or Romania.  War.  Not a large war, a local, family, war.  An old blood feud between some of the powerful houses had broken out.  Some, as with this woman, chose to escape.  She had no close family ties, to either side, and was not married either.  So she was at great risk and with no real means of self-defense against the various soldiers.  I believe my church had brought her in, and had sort of just told me to take her in.  So, yeah, I did.

She spoke English, if not really well.  She spoke her own tongue, but only as a native.  She didn't know the language really well, structurally or such.  It either wasn't taught or was not her forte.  Still, we worked on language up front, and tried to learn to communicate and to teach each other.  She was a pretty enough woman.  Middle aged, a younger middle-age than myself.  Even so. probably not virginal, so of little interest.  A younger woman who makes a mistake is somewhat forgivable.  A middle-aged woman who has been on several and more casting couches is not.  I just didn't get the sense that she could have children anyway.  Still, I was as friendly as possible.  And, personably.  She was a fine seeming woman, in the general way.  And I did have sympathy for her plight.

We did become friends.  She had much curiosity, and I fed that as much as possible.  I was given a small stipend for her overstay, which I used to feed her books and some travel, what went beyond food and household expenses.  I am just as curious as she was.  It was fine to share in a search for history, knowledge, wisdom, and understanding.  I even tutored her with English, tried with math but she became frustrated with that very quickly.  Still, I did insist on just a bit of mathematics.  Simple functions, fractions, and minor bookkeeping.  I let her catch my checkbook up from the last four years.  Not because I need, or want, that, but because she would eventually be on her own and need to understand dollars and cents.

On one of our trips, some of her enemies, who happen to have traveled here seeking other enemies but who found her and started to hunt her, interrupted our travels.  Between me being armed, and trained (far better than the thugs who attacked), thus saving us from dying that way, she had also, in fleeing while the gun battle occurred, slipped and fallen over a path, and was hanging on for dear life.  After dispatching or chasing off the hooligans, I found her, told her to be calm and relax as much as possible, that I would be right back.  She thought I would need to go into town, so was extremely surprised when I literally returned in a few minutes with rope.  I had a harness too, but it was far too big for her, and would have been a danger.  I tied a few loops that would work for legs and torso, and lowered it to her.  She was able, with simple instruction and taking of some minor risk, able to get into the rig.  At which time I pulled her up.  She laughed and was pleased, and suggested I was just like John Wayne.  Funny how they, over there, some of them, still remember him and Americans don't.

That night she offered herself to me.  Not... rudely.  Not... rightly, in a secular way.  I let her know I was celibate.  Though I... also showed her that I could, and showed her that I was interested, while refraining from actually engaging.  I wanted to make sure she didn't... misunderestimate.  If anything, I impressed her further.  If too, she hated me for it.

Soon, though, her time was coming to leave.  We talked, and wondered.  We found out as much as we could to ease her mind.  On the last day, I... broke my oath.  She didn't want to, by then, but didn't resist.  I made love to her that whole day, in many ways.

A few months later, she let me know that she was indeed pregnant.  That she had been a virgin until me.  I told her I would accept her, but not as a wife, as a house servant.  But that I would respect the child as my own.  If she wanted to stay with me.  I don't know if she accepted, but I think in time she did.

Hey, keep any judgements in YOUR pants.  It was, after all, simply a dream.
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The next two, while they differ in a major way, about a major point, are two parts to a tale of searching.  The story is based in India, where I am seeking specific components for a non-metal, non-leather armor.  Personal armor, sort of like what knights or samurai wore.  I had researched on ancient cultures and had stumbled upon two types of armor that, it was written, were made from types of grains or seeds.  The grains were only grown, unmodified to a degree from their original types, in a few places in the world.  In both cases, it seems some of the more traditional parts of India would at least get me started.  I even had dna samples from the original grains by which to compare the crops reported to be of the same traditional strains.
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The first part of the dream, I was just me.  I do have a way with these things.  If I have the energy.  In foreign countries, especially at the lower end of the economic scales, where governments are somewhere between weak, arrogant, corrupt, and the rest, and the people can be kind to absolutely depraved, without always being able to tell when or where you will interact with what, it takes... instinct and the will to do what it takes to survive.  Best to know who is approaching, and why.  And yet best not seem like a killswitch.  Balance, nuance.

As I said, I was searching for a few farms that might still grow some ancient crops.  India is hot and muggy often.  There is some variance, but, really, especially for someone like me, it is just... hot and muggy or hotter and muggier.  I sometimes hired a sort of long distance taxi service.  Somewhat of a taxi plus a guide and a second for security.  I still had connections, and those connections have connections everywhere.  For a bit of kit, I might have to do some kibootle.  I grab a clean connection, then I deliver a package.  Nothing technically illegal, but sure as shit to get me shot if found.  But, hey, who wants to live forever?

The rest of the dream was just... boring.  I found two sources of one of the grains, and secured the crop and next year growing season, just to make sure.  Plus, if I found grains that were more true to what I was looking for, both farmers had been willing to forgo their normal seeds for a year or two, possible more, so long as their current seed would be saved for their future use, or kept in production some other way.  Tit for tat, farmer, .mil, .intel, .woman...  Just the way it goes.  Then that part of the dream ended.
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The next part of the dream was a bit odd.  In it I was a woman.  Talk about tit and tat.  Never mind.  Anyway...  Somehow I, as a woman, took over the operation, but before I as a man had begun it.  My plan to get to India was a bit different.  Women really do have to do things differently.  It just doesn't pay to try to bravado their way through things.  Security had to be beefed up.  And even with it, as a woman, it was a concern.  Especially with India becoming a terribly murderously raping nation, in some parts.  The horror stories out of there are pretty rough.  That's was social pressure to only have sons and the technology to get what you wish... but then unbalance everything.  Why not just change the marriage system so that dowries aren't so crushing?  Why not a lot of things.  But that isn't our call, and it certainly isn't as easy as it sounds.  I'm not even sure they are even trying, or looking at options.

Anyway, the rest of the dream was similar to it's... sister dream... brother dream?  Only a lot more fussing.  Crazy.  A man, such as myself in real life, can go wherever and do whatever, and just... do it.  A woman wants to plan, needs a shower or bath and privacy and clean clothes and... and... and...  Gah!  That part of the dream about drove me batshit.

No, ladies, and women, and broads, you are not equal.  You can't "just do", or "just go", or "not worry".  Anyway... those were the dreams. 
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Oh, a little music, since you have been such good kiddies, reading right along.  No, no other thing other than I like this singer and group.  Not sure if I like the song yet or not, but it's... got a sexy sadness to it.  Not a terrible thing for something that dreams both left and right of some lines.  *wink*

A song sort of... well... myth and all, plus the dream, some other notions, and such.  Yeah...  Gotta be careful of those things that are hard to put down and aren't of just one type.  *wink*

Took me all day to write this out.  I got to it, and, bit by part, finished it.  I'm surprised the dream memories held.  Good night.