Hoping it is cool upstairs.

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I've been meaning to crash for a bit.  I just... kept... forgetting?  I did get the ducks more food and water.  Oh!  It's probably still running?

...

The heat must be getting to me.  After I turned off the water, I... got lost.  Went on upstairs.  The other ac doesn't do any better.  It was 80 upstairs, as well as 77 downstairs and 84 in the front room.  I 'got comfortable', set the fans to where they were optimal, and tried to rest.  No dice.  Far too hot.  Last I looked it was 92~94 outside.  That branch really did help.  Life is going to be miserable this summer.

I have gotten to where I can handle the heat of the day, through the day, mostly.  But this?  Unless I can figure out how to create a cooler place to sleep, I am in trouble.  Last night I made a mistake.  But that is when it cools off at night.  It won't be cooling off in the near future.  Yea, it is going to get tight.

It looks like I wiped out on medicine yesterday.  Or the day before?  I missed medicine.  I was sure I had taken it, but heat can through you.  Well, and I was busy with calls and other things.  Perhaps I just failed.  I was so sure I took them, though.

I told the judge my heart actually gets tired.  I think he thought I was being dramatic.  But, right now, it is tired.  It hurts right through my chest.  The heat?  Stress, which currently is from heat?  It hurts.  It is doing something odd in there, like trying to relax, but can't.  It isn't even beating all that fast, or hard.  It's more like it is trying to work, but can't.  Much like me.  BP is 143/102 with a pulse of 90.  The pulse and diastolic are a bit high, but not compared to my standards.  Just... heat stressed then.

I didn't mention I had quit tobacco, alcohol, and changed my diet as much as I am able.  I even found medicines that... work... or better... sometimes... and do my best to take what I trust, and can.  Even caffeine has been cut from massive doses, to a cup-a every other day or so.  It hasn't helped.  But... I have gone that path.  I have lost a hundred pounds, if before I came here, too.  I can't seem to lose any more.

Why bother.  I am pretty sure that was a wipe.  The law and all, is the law.  My neighbor thought it sounded positive.  I was pretty sure he just didn't want to see a grown man... whatever he fears seeing a grown man do.  I wouldn't have.  I... already know.  It's just a matter of figuring out how to get out of here without too much pain.  More pain.  And... sorting out where to go.

A lot of things to toss.  Or... just leave?  Not when high summer is hitting.  Not with animals.  I'll have to... sort some things out.  Yes, I already know.  The first clue was that no lawyer would take the case.  They knew something.  Surprised them that I got a judge in Chicago, but... I didn't do that.  I have no idea what happened with that.  Probably someone with some connections trying to... give me a chance?  I'll never know, not for sure.

Well, I'll... begin sorting, as able.  If money is back in order next month, I will get a smaller industrial dumpster, begin filling it.  Just get down to the suv, some camping gear, perhaps some of the food stores, and... away.  Though, I understand.  They will be pushing people out of everywhere but the worst of places.  And some of those are dangerous for a lot of reasons.  I will eventually lose the vehicle, be on foot.

I can't do rail lines.  Besides, they have shut a lot of those down.  Might well be killing freeriders.  The world has... become old school.  Except where they want the useless to go.  LA, San Fran, any big city, all even in better states are run by the left.  Traps, death traps, gotta be.  I can't afford rent and all, either.  And no one would rent to someone who just lost their house.  It's... a one way ticket.  I know it.  Next spring?  Yeah.  If it goes that way.  Just thinking out loud.