Ouch.

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I have to find some large, long, gloves.  Rubber, this, that, the other.  From washing things, and my hands after touching things that were dusty, grimy, or else, all day while doing any number of odd jobs, dishes, laundry, and else, my hands are falling apart.  While washing my hands just now, I noticed blood on the faucet knob.

So, I went looking.  A stealth blood nose?  No.  Locating the, probable, culprit was difficult.  Minor tears in the skin, here, there... everywhere!  My hands hurt, when I took a shower earlier.  Now I know why.  I still don't know which tear left the blood on the knob.  It could have been one of a score.  If it seems to have stopped quickly.  Strange.

Hot water, here and there.  Cold water usually.  Soaps, detergents, scrubbing with washcloth, scrubbing with a steel scrubber, just washing hands in look warm water.  I will see if I can find some sort of salve, or aloe vera lotion, medical cream.  Oh, I should have plenty.  I used a lot of different things on the leg wound.  Some of it didn't work for that, but might work for this.  Talk about working your fingers to the bone.

I had thought to be back in bed by now.  But I just couldn't get there.  Thoughts keep my awake.  Well, and... sorting.  How to try to go forward with no future?  But... I've... lost my future many times before.  Some of it permanent, if not total.  Some of it returned.  Eventually there is an end.  We'll see.

I left the furnace and heat off, up here in front.  Until now.  I am not going to sleep, so might as well be comfortable.  The cold wasn't enough to drive me back to bed, as had been hoped.  So... I started doing little things.  Sorting the dishes, for soaking... when I get back to that.  Cleaning the water kettle, running it one more time, after four other runs, with vinegar water, to get the last of the scale off, then wiping that off, where it came out of the lid and spout as steam.  Then emptying that, adding regular water, and running that through a few times.  One run down.

I reset the dryer.  And, did go ahead with another load of synthetics.  May do a large load of whites, next, if I remain awake.  And put the dryer stuff on hangers, fold, or whatever is required.  Doing well.  Taking a lot of breaks.  More breaks than work, to be honest.  But, staying on it.  Getting up and doing... something... every fifteen to thirty minutes?  How... I would like to have worked, at least, for decades.  Blocked, stopped, but not now?  So strange.

Had to make fresh water, for the tea pot usage.  Didn't want to use tap in it, even with the softener, it's... hard.  Or, perhaps that is some of the salts from the softener?  Both?  Dunno.  Keeping up on water.  And, now, with the dishwasher, which gets the glass jugs and jars sparkly like old Doom likes them, I can keep up on switching those out often.  I have enough to easily swap any I need, for water, kefir, or else, at a moment.

Oh, and the shelf I keep them on is coming into clarity and sanity.  Throwing things that have been cluttering the place, collecting dust, for years.  Some of it is timed out, some of it was never used, or used by not liked.  Still, there was hope I would come around.

Little areas here, there, everywhere, being picked, sorted, cleared, cleaned, as I go.  I finally cleared the stovetop.  Yes, a bad place to have things, but... yes.  I know.  And hit the counter, the last few days really.  Nearly open.  But... another few rounds, and then some serious cleaning... elbow grease needs be applied.  Then the kitchen sinks.

The cupboards are being picked over, bit by bit.  What to keep, clean, toss.  Charity?  No.  The... world has too many things.  It neither wants, needs, or really should have, more stupid stuff it doesn't need.  I'm the poster child, or a poster child, of that.

Bags, in three, four, five rooms?  Plus the trash can in the kitchen being, often, a primary catchall when I forget the other bags, just happen to be going that way anyway.  Three large bags, two already out, full.  plus, I'd say, a bag and a half, very full, between the rest of the bags.  None of them full enough to pull.  But the trash bin outside is nearly full.  It'll take one more full big bag, which I have at the ready.  But more?  I don't think so.

This next week, or this week?  I... get confused.  When I am talking but have death buzzing in my hindbrain.  Anyway.  The bathroom will be stripped, opened, and prepped this next work session.  Two days of effort.  I'd like to put floating shelves in there, and one or two sinks, and medicine cabinets.  Nothing fancy.  Possibly with a tankless water heater.  It's a tiny space, so a thirty to fifty gallon tank in there takes up precious space, and looks... tacky.  Just... it does.  It does work though.  Oh, and a light, or two.  If two sinks and medicine cabinets, then two sets of lights.

I don't know.  I just think en suites, for a master bedroom, really deserve doubles.  His and hers.  This place was made for a family.  And there is enough strife as is.  A little personal space, right in intimate spaces, is... good.

The flooring needs redone.  The shower is very good, if some grout work would be useful.  A floor drain, with or without a regular tank water heater.  A new toilet.  I have the sinks, fixtures for those, several floor drains (wasn't sure which I wanted), and a new toilet for in there already bought and ready.  So... it's just running the copper, adding the floating shelving, putting in the items, wiring (have to have an electrician do that, and possibly just have him install the tankless while at it, if going that way).  As well, installing the floor drain, changing the flooring, and maybe adding a vent?  There is a window, well frosted unless opened... so I'd like a fan vent.  Have to open the walls for other work anyway, and it's on an outside wall, so that shouldn't be a problem.  But... a lot of work.

I may have him rather than try to do all the work?  Just... work when he can.  But, show up a few times a week.  Acting like a boss.  Telling me what to do next, sort of.  If I get stuck, on some things, contact him, or someone else.  His dad is handy, too.  And there is another local fellow who might be able to give his two cents.

If you can't be a worker, be a servant.  If you can't be a servant, be a slave?  Just... do.  Learn.  Work.  Get it done.  Rip and tear, even, as is needed.

I can't believe how much has been done in just the last two weeks.  Or since the dumpster.  I am pretty sure, now, that I can spend, say, a month getting things ready to go, then getting a dumpster for a few weeks to a month.  Depending on costs for dumping.  The initial arrival fee is a ton, but then it's by the day and far less.  Just need to find out how much emptying or exchanging that costs.  Just... good to know.

Tonight yet?  Laundry.  The two loads in, if possibly.  Starting a third load.  Possibly finishing that load if I just can't sleep.  As well, a bit more picking up, here an there.  Looking through things, over things, for things.  Being nosy, curious, seems to be working for me.  Possibly cleaning up this desktop.

I'd sure like to get the living room ready to move the computer out there.  Easier to keep just the main house cool, close off this front area, for summer.  And into next winter.  If I am still here.  I play, now, as if I am going to be here, then.

I might even begin going into the spare and master bedroom, looking, opening, tossing, sorting.  Just... fifteen minutes, to twenty, gets far more done than I thought.  Plus, it isn't then being covered over, as everything is going out rather than coming in, especially those rooms.  So the place is beginning to change.

I ordered a small point and shoot digital camera.  I want to begin documenting... from where I am starting to when I finish... or as far as I get, living or dead.  Just... for my own records.  Though, possibly, I may share it... in time.  Probably not until after a sale though.  If it goes that way.  "Smart phone" camera?  Yeah no.  Those are compromised.  Who knows who has access to what you have on those.  No, I'll... keep it in a separate camera.  Nothing fancy.  Cheap and reliable as I could find.  As good as cellphones?  No, but also not sent to google for "perfecting".  Yes, you'd be surprised what you send corporate, and... whoever else has access to corporate.

Rambling!  /rambling

Later.