Not all hoped.

.

.

Just couldn't.  Kept getting lost... in thought, memory choke points, or firing failures.  I did open windows, for fresh cool clean air.  I brought canned waters in.  I went out to set hoses up, didn't have a light, so thought to break boxes down.  Fumbled that, no cutter.

So found a cutter.  Went out but stumbled toward the hoses, but without a light?  Back up to look for a flashlight.  On it went, until I was exhausted from going up and down the steps, always with the wrong items for the chore?

Know when to quit.  But... I did find the pile of knives and lights I had acrued, then seemingly lost... right in front of me?  Must be tired.  Too tired.

I did get water going.  Two fills, then the reservoir.  As well, I put the towels away that mother folded.  I did a few knives, in the sink.  And am finishing a sip of kefir, after having waters, cold cuts, and cheese.  Might have another kefir.  A very rare double shot of the stuff.  Is she getting into it?  No, all good.  I just need too make more.  Up to four quarts.  Happy to share, especially the good stuff.  Just... need to plan for it.

Mother got into my cheese.  To be fair, it is all we had.  But it is the rare real rennet cheese.  She doesn't know, or care.  Wait, there was American, which I won't eat.  NOT going to complain.  For the work she does, she could eat my last steak.  I begrudge her nothing.  It's more scarcity, on my wants, and other cheeses and her indifference.  Price, to be honest, is similar by weight.  I'll have to... speak with her.  If she really likes this cheese?  I'll get more.  If it was just there, I'll get her regular cheese.  Not a point of contention, just consideration and planning.

Oh... and earlier?  She asked if, at night, if she woke up, if she could come out and join me.  I was doing 'calculus' on three things, so didn't hear... in the normal way, or ever respond.  I remembered, just a bit ago, so wrote a note.  Telling her, twice, she is always welcome.  Poor thing is so lonely sometimes, and I am asleep or a statue.  I... do try.

Maybe not everything.  But the important things.

Good night.