Very rough morning.

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I... couldn't wake up.  Had to really push.  Sassy was downstairs bawling, meowling, her fool head off.  I checked the clock.  Almost ten?  Why?  Why was I having such a difficult time waking?  I didn't know.  But I woke and started something small, upstairs.

The shoelaces arrived.  And, with what else I had bought, I looked them over.  The ones I bought at Al's weren't up to snuff.  Nylon?  Or something.  Good for some things, perhaps better for hiking when in rain, or through streams?  Or... something.  But, no, not what I wanted.

The ones from amazon seemed a bit better.  Not as good as the original, but better than Al's, and longer but not too long.  Ugh.  It's... as good as it will do for now.  So, I put the 55 or 56 inch laces on the Keen boots.  And, yes, it works.  But, rather than using any of the new, I used the old boot laces on the Keen shoes.  The boot laces are a few inches longer, so worked perfectly on the shoes.  I may see if Keens sells laces.  Afraid of the costs, to be sure.  But they are fantastic laces, just too short for what they come with.

All done.  Started and finished.  Wore the boots today.  Got downstairs.  Fed Sassy first off.  Then browsed the web a bit, and began gaming.  Something was just off.  I felt so cold!  Turned the furnace up, from 70 to 74.  Nothing, it just didn't seem to help, at all.

Then the doorbell rang.  Unusual, but I went and looked.  A package.  The metal lid for the flattop grill.  Between that and the burlap cover, it should help me keep that in better shape.  As I was going through the house, to get out and put that together, I checked the thermostat.  It was indicating 74, but reading... 61?  What the...

I decided to go look in the basement.  Perhaps the filter is filled already, or maybe the furnace was off?  Or...  I... didn't know.  I didn't know what to look for either.  But, to it.  Down I went.  Okay.  It was the furnace.  She was off.  The flip of a switch and she was back to it.  Ah...  It still took a bit, but it did warm after a bit.  Further, when it hit 74, after being so cool, I turned it down to 72.  Which was almost too warm even then, until I got used to it.

Then out to put the lid together for the flattop.  It either went this way, or that way.  There is, technically, a right and wrong way.  Though it would work either way, just that the writing on it would be the wrong way.  Too tired to think it through, so I just... flipped a coin (not literally).  And it worked out.  Then I installed it over the flattop, put the tarp back over the whole kit, and there she be.  It is sunny out, 

Or... was.  Clouds are back!  Gah!  So I may figure out a place to put it, under somewhere.

But, first, I need to do dishes... at least give them another shot.  Then set them out so that I can shower.  Hoping to make it to another mass today.  Probably not tomorrow.  But, then, Sunday too.  While I didn't make it much this week, I am making up for it.  No guarantee about today, but that is the plan.  Then a small bit of shopping.

I have a friend, in the KoC, and church, who has difficulties.  One of them, as with all bachelors, is keeping up on the house.  Cooking causes a mess.  Oil spatter, smoke, cooking smells.  For me, this flattop grill, along with the regular grill (once I get coals again), together will allow me to do a lot of my cooking outdoors.  I'll, mostly, if I used the oven, use it for a warming box... well, and roasts.

Winter or summer, I can use the grills most of the time.  Even if I am cold, cooking is a warm project.  And, I... seem to tolerate the cold well, for short spits anyway.  I may have to suggest this to him.  Even let him practice with it, to see if it works for his needs and wants.  

Sure, there is an initial outlay.  And there are ongoing costs, in propane.  But the savings on electric (which is crudely too high these days) and the ease of cleaning and else, a flattop might well pay for itself, especially while keeping the house cleaner, and allowing less expensive foods.  Yes, it does cost as much as an inexpensive oven.  But it is far more versatile, especially with the grill on this one.

When can I get to seasoning the grill?  I can't be sure.  I'll want the weather to be better.  I'll want to be in better shape... not so exhausted.  I just don't know.  This coming week, sometime.  I'd love to do it today.  Probablem is, I don't have the lard or other fat I prefer.  No, I won't use canola, rapeseed, grapeseed, or other processed oil.  NO!  I need lard or tallow, non-hydrogenated.  I may look in the store.

Could use bacon?  I don't think that works.  It needs the processing oils burned off.  Could put bacon on raw.  Get the fats from that.  But, the bacon would be a loss (to my mind, I wouldn't use it).  Have you priced bacon recently?  Yea, no.  So, I will look.  I do have tallow as said coming.  But it won't be here until Monday.  Scratch that, Thursday.  I want to at least be able to get to it before then.  Which means I'd still like to see about finding lard or tallow locally, that is quality, unhydroginated, perhaps even today.  I dont' worry about it being grass fed/finished, or non-gmo.  Don't give a shoot about that.  Just unhydroginated, and without any extra chemicals... just rendered fats.  Nothing more.

So tired.  Even now that I am warmer.  Not sure I can make it today.  It's already 13:00.  I'll hit the dishes, work on the freezertop, then see if a shower can be taken and if I can make it to mass this afternoon.  I'm... certainly trying.

I did get in.

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Mass, at 17:00.  Oh, I wasn't sure I was going to make it.  I was falling asleep in my chair from noon to 15:00.

I didn't get much more done.  I did reset the tarp out there.  It wasn't a lot of work, but some.  I used hiking poles as spreaderes, from on top, along with bungee cords.  Really, I got it to much better shape.

Why so tired?  I can't say.  It wasn't what was done earlier.  I had done very little, only helped.  Was so tired before and after anyway.

Still the grill is put together, and moved somewhere better.  The sun was out, and no rain or snow today for the first time in... I... can't remember.  Two weeks?  It seems like it.  But it is still cold out there.  I think it got up to 28, but just for a short bit.  Then it went back down to the 24 as of when I left, I think.  If it remains 24 as I returned.

I did do a bit of shopping.  Oh, and I got the laser thermometer working.  I ordered one.  With the help of my helper, the thing now works.  I will give him this one.  Now I know how to fix them in the future.  Another one is on the way anyway.  I'll keep this one until the new one arrives though, so I can experiment with the flattop grill.

So very tired.  It's just about 21:00.  I think I'm going on to bed.  I'll leave the door downstairs closed tonight.  I've let Sassy up the last few nights.  I need a break.  Especially if I am going to try to make a few more masses this weekend.  Tomorrow and Sunday is my plan.  Yes.

I am so glad to be back in church.  Even if it is difficult, I like being back in, getting the Eucharist, praying, and participating.  I am learning things.  Not sure if memory will stick.  But... I'll do what I can.  I will begin looking for ways to know what songs are to be sung, how the mass goes, and such.  So I can participate more fully.  As is, I am lost in there.  Everybody had to start somewhere, or restart.  Amen.

Help... helped.

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I woke, but was not moving fast or well.  Even then, it took a text to get me going at around eight.  Eighteen after.  Awake?  Am now.  But just barely.  I don't think I went down until around 21:30 give or take small change.  If memory serves.  I slept okay, but with the fistfull of waterpills still working from early in the morning, I peed all night.  Filled a three liter pee jug.  So didn't sleep perfectly.

And I am tired this morning.  It was a difficult world this morning, and last night.  Legs are like pins and needles, burning ones.  When the skin retracts, after having been bulked out with fluids, it hurts.  Just as while it is ballooning.  So, between gaining and losing water weight I definitely go through foot, ankle, and leg pains.

Still, I... got up, dressed, and was ready.  I asked that he bring rolls, potato rolls.  I sliced some of the roast thinly enough for sandwiches... which were had when we finished.

We... mostly he... got the furnace arranged so that it holds the filter correctly.  There is just a bit of wiggle, if I think that is normal.  I may work on adding cardboard shims to tighten that up.  And I will look for more new filters.  I used the last one I had anyway.  And those need to be changed every three to four months.  I will probably go with a mid-tier merv.  See how that works.

After that, we got to the flattop.  I had obtained two new propane tanks.  One is fresh, the other seems to have been replaced with an old one, and empty.  Oh well.  But, the grill is together.  I helped, in small ways.  He doesn't like help, usually.  But, when I help, it usually... is works out well.  I really couldn't do much today, but I could hold the cart at a better angle for assembly, and a do a few other minor things.

I was honestly having difficulty standing for as long as I did, while he tinkered today.  I am very tired, worn.  My legs are burning from standing.  Not... sure why.  I was totally exhausted by the time we finished.  The mushrooms and sandwiches worked well.  Homemade mayo, and mustard.  Which he thought were okay.  He passed on the mushrooms... more for me.

I'm having a bit of kefir to finish off lunch.  Then?

I don't know.  So very tired.  I have dishes I would like to run through.  But the freezertop being cleared and cleaned first is a requirement.  Then, perhaps, a shower?  A trim before that?  There is a mass tonight.  I am hoping to make it.  It seems there are many special masses to the end of the week and on through to Sunday, of course.  I am going to try to make it to two or three.  I know, required.  I also know, if I can't stand, I can't get to church.  And... that is difficult at the moment.  Not sure what is wrong, but... will... try to push on through.  If I can make three masses, I... will be happy.  And, I am back in good standing, so it does mean something.

It was 24 out there, last I looked.  The sun is out though.  Shining nicely, on a frigid (for April) day.

I need to get the house cleaned back up.  I have let the kitchen fall, but I was doing things.  And I have worn myself out fairly terribly.  I'll keep at things.

I did figure out the tarp, as I may have mentioned?  It is up, out there.  But I brought all else in.  I think the new straps are due to arrive today.  For the hammock.  We'll see.  With it not snowing, and blowing, I may try to get out there.  I'll rig a pee jug up, too, so that it hangs, and I can just use it almost like a hanging urinal, pull it inside the flaps for privacy.  Yea.  This time, though, I will try to rig the hammock, sleeping bag system, and underquilt much more correctly... and lower.  Tiptoeing it out of the hammock, while having to pee, in the dark, cold, and sometimes windy and wet?  No thank you.  Still, I... think I could really enjoy sleeping out there.  Fresh air is wonderful, if nothing else.  Though maybe the air filter will really help.

Sore, tired.  My heart hurts today, for some reason.  I was good yesterday, but it has been bad for a long time before.  I really wonder if I am about to die.  This is... worse than even what I am used to.  I don't think it would be a bad thing.  But, I'll leave it up to God.  

Tomorrow?

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Will find out soon enough.  That is the plan.  Setting up the grill, looking at the furnace filter area, and perhaps checking out some notions regarding the new tarp, with the boxable ends.  Well, and showing off just a bit.

While I have backslid, on the house, in some areas, I have gotten ahead in others.  Oiling and greasing this and that.  Getting the new rollers in on the garage door.  Clearing the bathroom and bathroom hall, and sweeping.  I may mop in there yet tonight.

There are a few other things that have been improved.  I had hoped to have more done, but I needed today as a mostly off day.  And I took it off, mostly.  By Saturday, I am hoping to have the things listed done... if those won't really be noticeable.  But, too, get the kitchen table cleared, and maybe clearn the kitchen floor, and get it swept.  Maybe the hallways too... and laundry room/hall?  We'll see.

I am doing well.  Even today, I have done things.  Little things, but with solid improvements.  If I can get the freezertop cleared and cleaned, the dishes that are in there finished, and the laundry dried and checked yet tonight, I... will have done a pleasantly mild but solid day.

I... don't know how this is working.  It really was hurting yesterday, but I am doing well today.  Yes.  And, next week, even more.  The problem I have with the kitchen, and hallways/laundry room area, is where to put things!  Ugh.  I'll see what I can do.  Though, I have a lot more space up here, in this front room.

Those things would crowd this room back up, but would leave those areas clear.  So... as I sort things, that might not be bad?

I also checked swimming times.  Lap times are a lont way off, or right on, the mass time.  I might be able to make it in for the half hour swims, if I can get in right away.  Or I will have to figure out other ways, take much more time in between swimming and mass.  I don't want to have to drive home.  Too expensive.  Perhaps I could hit the library, or just read something I have, or... I don't know.  Trying to find cheap timekillers for between swimming and mass, if I end up needing three or four hours.  Ugh.

Oh, I didn't find my swimming gear though.  So... not tomorrow.  Swimming anyway.  But, maybe mass?  Depends on how long the efforts take.  Not sure... when, just in the morning.  Easy for me, since I have been waking around five to seven.  Ugh.  I'll try to get to bed as soon, and shortly, as possible.  So waking will be easier.  But I'm not hurting, so perhaps I won't need a twelve hour sleep tonight?  We'll see.

The waterpills really helped.  I voided a lot of fluid.  I would guess I zipped out a gallon and a half, or more.  That, too, has helped me feel better.  I may do three more pills tomorrow.  Then go back to normal.  Not sure why it was being held, but will take care of it.  Compression socks, the pills, and drinking as much as I need to as well.  I don't want to be choking on thirst to lose that water.  Tricky business.

The flattop grill arrived two days early.

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No worries there.  Always good to have it arrive early.  But, there isn't a good shot at getting it together solo.  I had to get the heavy duty appliance dolly to move it from the front porch to the back.  Way to heavy.  Even that was a trick.  Just getting it up, then leaning it back onto the cart was... some effort.

I am checking about help on some things.  Looks like, perhaps, tonight or tomorrow morning.  Get the flattop going, then perhaps begin figuring out the furnace.  Yes.  That should help a lot.  A lot of dust in there, so it will never be perfect without pulling it and redoing things.  But... it... will help, for now.  Oh, and I may see if he might be interested in adding a humidifier to the unit, or even consider helping install a new unit later this year... say before fall?  It might or might not be something he would be willing to do.  This would give him time to review the technicals, and see if this might be doable for him, or not.

I think, with central air, that would absolutely have to be done by a pro.  It would be a fresh, first, installation.  Unlike the furnace, which would be a replacement.  I could pay him a hefty fee, and still save a ton buying the unit and helping.  Perhaps.  I may get a quote, however, just to make sure.  And, let them know, I am looking at doing it myself.  See if they wouldn't come down some.

Risk?  Reward.  Risk is what it is, as is reward.

I did hit the dishes again.  Not sure that will be enough.  Will find out in an hour or so.  That is the majority of the remaining dishes.  Still some more, but bigger items.  Need to hit the freezertop.  When I sliced the beef yesterday, a lot of blood ran.  I cleaned, but not enough.  I'll get that tonight, so I can do some food things tomorrow.

The sun came out!  Earlier.  I just went to look out and enjoy and...  Clouds closed back in, plus it started snowing again.  Oh well.  I did get to see the sun for just a spot today.  Yes, yes that helps a good deal.

I am hoping to finish dishes.  Oh, and I need to put the wash to going.  Then get that dried yet tonight.  I am thinking a bit more of the roast, sliced thinly, with a twice baked potato.  Yeah.  Any other work?  Maybe to mop the bathroom and bathroom hallway.  That would be good.

Just a few lighter things.

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While I did change out the rollers, for the garage door, there were a few bolts missing.  I asked someone to pick those up, if he had an opportunity.

As well, I hadn't oiled the wheels and stems, so I went looking for spray oil, silicon spray, or deep penetrating stuff.  Which I ended up finding, both the latter.  Which coveres the former most as well.  Deep pentrating oil is still... just oil.  So, I grabbed that and went out.

The problem?  I got the door lock, for the garage door, working.  However, the handle on the outside doesn't work.  Or is locked and I don't have the key?  So... I had to try to use the side door.  But, the lock on that was really giving me fits.  It didn't want to let go.  I did give it a bit of a spray, but it didn't really help.  Still, I got it.

Then in, I sprayed the garage door tracks, and the wheels, plus the bars going to the wheels from the elbow joints on the garage door.  Wee!  Now she spins.  I had thought it was just here weight, the garage door.  But, no, this really makes lifting it a breeze.  

Then I went back to the deadbolt on the door.  Locked that, unlocked.  Still pretty tacky.  So I hit it here, there, front, back, worked it while spraying, after it was sprayed.  Gave it a bit more.  Hoping it will improve.  Still a bit sticky, if not as bad.  Tells me it probably isn't just the lock mechanism.  The bolt may be dragging, the door may be hanging, something else is causing physical friction or blocking.  I've done what I will for that for today.

Though, while with the oils, I went around to all the doors.  Several locks and other security devices have been tacky.  I gave everything and it's uncle a spot of oil, some working around, and testing.  Seems good, for now.  It's as much as I will do for now.  Happy with it.

Before all that, though, I got the dishes which had been soaking a shot.  A lot of grease in it, so they will need another soapy soak and wash.  Hopefully that will be enough.  I'll find out in an hour or two.  I'm not pushing today.  I am taking it slow.  Sounds like work, but it was all, mostly, rather easy.  Even lifting the garage door, at this point, was easy... easier.

Not sure, if it arrives soon, whether I will get to the kitchen sink drains or not today.  Though, if I do, I will probably only start out with one.  Make sure it fits.  If it does, and is watertight with the method I use... after several days... then get to the other one.  If not, send them back.  Hmm, sounds like everything just showed up.  Goody.

Bits and pieces.  Not a bad day, for a light day.  I need lots of breaks.  I tire very easily.  But, my heart hasn't given me much fuss today.  It isn't straining, hurting, or excessively tired.  But I don't want it to get to that point either.  A nice, level, easy, day.  Oh... one load of laundry.  Something I need to test, make sure it works for me.  I'll bring in the deliveries, get the laundry going, then do some gaming.

Lost.

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Losing?  Losing.  Don't know where it went.  Hips to ass?  Fifteen pounds, gone.  Odd.  I am not dieting.  If I am eating differently.  More kefir, or... a regular amount.  More like a quart or so a day.  More meat, in the diet.  Though not excluding veggies completely.  Salads, of various sorts... fresh veggies steamed or raw with salad dressing or hummus.  Still, mostly meat.

As well, I have cut coffee and tea intake.  Stronger, but less.  About four dosers during a day, maximum.  Trying to cut back more to two or three.  Using a french press to make it just so.  As well, trying to eliminate sweeteners, mostly.  A sweetened drink a day, every other day.  And, using less.  Even keto sweeteners have limits.  So, the less I use the better.

It was a nice surprise to see yesterday.  If, as I suggested, my diet isn't for weight loss.  I have given up on that.  Who knows, it may all come back next week.  It... can do that.

A few tools and parts are arriving today, if... what has been suggested by the sellers is correct.  Parts for the kitchen sink, a tool for the bathroom tub (the replacement parts for that will be next month), and a few other things.  Not sure I will get to those today, but hopefully yet this week.

The flattop grill is supposed to be here Friday.  Depending on the time it arrives, I will attempt to assemble it when it arrives.  If it is too late, I'll try to get it together Saturday.  I want to stop at the store before then, pick up non-hydrogenated fats... either lard or preferably tallow.  Not sure if they will be available.  Could use butter.  Don't trust storebough ghee.  Every type I have bought, from regular stores to "health food stores", the ghee has been mixed with other oils, and probably the kind you really don't want to eat (seed oils, or soy).

I should get to making ghee.  As the house is coming together, doing things like that, and rendering tallow and lard should be easier.  I'd like to have, say, six pints of each of those fats.  I could do bacon greese, but I'm not sure that is the best either.  Although, with a flattop grill, it will be vastly easier to obtain bacon grease than from a pan.

I have two propane tanks.  Might, through the summer, buy a few more.  Four would give me some solid cooking time.  Six would be better, but... so much money.  Though, over time, possible.  Then I could cook outdoors much more often.  Use the oven, more often than not, for a heating box while cooking various foods.  Though roasts will always require the oven.  Or the charcoal grill.  Hmm, I need more charcoal though.  I have run out.  Cooking outdoors will help with the house a great deal.

Yea.  Life seems to be coming back into bloom.  I am not waiting for spring to... spring.  I am just going to bulldoze my way through, even if I don't feel like it, it seems.  I am amazed the weather hasn't wiped me.  More light, even if I haven't seen the sun in... a week?  Two now?  It's been a while.  And it remains cold.  It was 24, hit 28 just now.  Might get up to the low to mid 30s yet today.  But that is still very cold for April 5th!

Still, if I can push on through, and keep things up, I will get going.  I will try to stay with it.  I will rest when needed, push when I can.  And, really, I am doing well.  Even if I get the sense death may be close.  Pushing too hard, but I can't... stop.  I didn't do because I couldn't to this point.  Now I can't slow it down.  Something is pushing me forward, through pain, exhaustion to the point of suffering, bruising, and else.  I... can't stop.  Well, I suppose, if I die I will stop... here.  I think I'll be busier dead than I even could have been alive.  Just... the way things go.  But, I am looking forward to it, oddly.

A twelve hour sleep.

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Much needed.  I pushed too hard recently.  Beyond physical exhaustion, the heart is so worn I have some concern.  As well, fluid was drastically collecting in my legs, ankles, and feet.  While compression socks back on, if after only a day off, I will take a few remaining waterpills today.  Say three.  And, if that doesn't do what is needed, five tomorrow.  No, I just went with five today.  And, probably, three tomorrow.  Then that should be good for a while.  

I checked first thing, outside, this morning.  It is 24 F.  It looks like some snow came down last night, but almost nothing stuck (to the driveway, difficult to tell out in the yard).  The driveway remains very clear, if not 100%.  Still around... 85 to 95 percent clear.  And what has snow just has a very light dusting sticking to it, along edges.

A few last orders coming in.  Some for the flattop grill, which itself is supposed to arrive Friday.  Some for the hammock gear, improved equipment.  Then I'll be on a financial diet for the month.  But I will have some things to tinker with.

Oh, after putting the garage door rollers in, I'll need to look around for oil.  Just a light coat of something or other.  I may do more tinkering with the folding doors, upstairs.  I really hate that they aren't well squared.  I think the bottom hinge plate on the left side is too low.  Maybe both of them are too low.  Not... sure they did anything but shove them in, at ground level, and call it good.

I will be receiving new drains for the kitchen sink, as well.  And a few other parts and pieces.  Those will go in when I can, probably yet this week, maybe yet today.  And I received a sheet metal bending tool, in order to tinker on the part of the furnace ducts which contain the filter.  It doesn't stay in there well.  I'd like to get that sorted.  Other parts and pieces are also arriving, in my final orders.  I may be able to really get some things sorted.  Little things, but things which have been on my mind for a long time.

While I hold my breath until next month, I will be trying to get the house clean, get to mass, and get back into the pool.  Something I will do today is find my swimming gear, get it washed.  Find a carrier for the goggles and such.  And have it all ready, while getting my mind ready.  I am hoping to be in to both mass and swimming soon.  Oh, I best check the swimming schedule, to see what would be the best times.  I can do that first thing.

On to my day.

A bit.

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It's a rough day.  The heart really is thumping.  Tired, for it.  Though probably from else as well.  Had to push, started late, got to some of it.

The first thing was a shower.  Well, after shoveling the driveway.  So, okay, I should be tired.  Before showering, I swept the bathroom and hallway as good as I could, and cleaned two of the pee jugs which had started accumulating.  It just happens, when I can't get going.

After the shower, I set up three smaller dishpans of dishes.  Then got dressed and out.  First to the pool.  Purchased a pass.  Had to take that one back, it was a day pass.  I wanted the semester pass.  I am sure I said that.  College kids hate older people, especially older men.  They'll get their turn.  Wait until they cut their nuts off and find out they are still hated.  Hahahaha.  Yea, it's... going to happen.

Anyway, done with that.  I had meant to get to shopping, but I was just... done.  Tired.  Crashing.  I did have a burger.  No, not the better one.  I just ate at what was at hand on the way out of town.  Some brown sugar trying to talk jive.  I settled that quickly.  Funny how they tighten up and speak English when shoved just a bit.

Then on to home.

Oh, and I did something else before the shower, after the driveway.  I have one of those folding doors, in my upstairs closet.  That thing hasn't been right since I moved in.  I just... didn't want to mess with it.  Finally, today, I got to it.  It isn't perfect.  But I am not sure it can be perfected.  I think the doors themselves are slightly warped.  But I did get them so that they close without bumping, and neither drags on the carpeting.

And, when I got home, after else, I changed the garage door rollers.  There are a dozen ways to do it.  I just bent the trackes, pulled the old rollers, put the new ones in, then bent the track back.  Yes, it works.  It was a bit more work than I had intended.  But, and yet, now it is done.

Wiped out though, currently.  I may have pushed too hard.  I know I pushed too hard.  I will take tomorrow off, mostly.  I may try to get my swimming gear together, and be ready for Thursday?  Perhaps.  The hope is to get in to mass, and swimming, with the shortest wait time between the two.  I'll... look that up.  And, the long term goal, is to swim and get to weekly mass twice a week.  If I do really well, perhaps in a year get to three times a week?  Not sure I can make it, but... that's... what goals are.  Hopes.

Had hoped to make it to mass.

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Too much snow.  I have been working on clearing the drive since I woke.  A bit here, a bit there.  It is done, but it is 11:30, as I catch my breath.  I need a shower before going to town, at least to mass.  But mass is at noon.  So even getting dressed and in would be... unlikely.

But, I did get the driveway shoveled.  There is... that.  Didn't beat me up too bad, but it did beat me up.  I had to go over what I shoveled earlier.  It hadn't completely filled in, but there was enough that it really needed to be removed for me to feel right.  It did warm from, say, 25 first thing, to 28 to 29 this last outing.  Not a large shift, but some.  And, some of the drive I had done earlier collected more snow, while other parts from earlier clearing had melted?  Very strange.

I left the tarp out.  There has been a goodly amount of snow collected, and then falled down from that.  Not like a ton.  And, some of it seems to melt, or simply be deflected.  Snow is mostly falling straight down.  Which almost makes me consider trying to sleep out there tonight.  Or... not.  Though, even if the wind picked up, and blew it into the enclosure, unless the volume really picked up, and the wind really whipped up, I don't think it would be a problem.  At least, not for one night.  A few nights, out on the trail, wet after rain after snow, and it could get really miserable.

Though, too, if I was out on some trail, I am sure I could find a better angle, against the wind.  So that it wouldn't get in.  As well, I have a tarp, with closures at the end, so as to encapsulate the sleeping area.  Yea, it's worth it.  I am also getting better tree straps.  Currently using a strap with sort of steps in it.  But that can't be set up in an exacting way.  I would guess there is six inches between steps.  There might be some other way to arrange that, but it would always be... difficult.  I ordered something that can be cinched, down to an exacting measure.

But, no, not tonight I think.  Still, might try to get out.  First, to get swimming going again.  Then to do a bit of shopping at my other store.  Lemons.  I never did get those stored.  I would like to buy enough to do so today.  With the house in better shape, doing little extra things like this is easier.  And, then, clean up after... plus a little extra cleaning while at it.

Oh.  I did slice some of the roast very thinly.  Then heated it in a foil pack in the oven.  Much much better.  It is still chewy, but when cut thin enough it's more of a feature than a bug.  It gives one something to bite into, whereas many meats, cut thin, simply don't have any substance.  And that beefy flavor really is pleasant.

I don't really need a shower, today.  Save if I were going to mass.  But I do need to dress a bit more appropriately.  And, while I have caught my breath, I... need just a bit more time to rest.  The drive wasn't a huge mess, the snow wasn't heavy, it was only about two inches.  But... it... got to me.  Maybe to town, maybe not.  

Who is saying "shh"?

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Who is there.  I hear the knocking.  But I can't remember who I see when I go to that door.  No, most of you wouldn't understand.  I do, mostly.  I just don't know.

Though, more than one.  Odd how... that can happen.

Who.

Down early, up late.

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Why?  The dark, cold, wet/damp has simply caught up with me.  I am having a heck of a time keeping up.  Tired.  Sore, even.  Not sure what I have been doing, but my forearms and wrists hurt, as if I strained them... used them beyond their capacities.  Cramping, in there.  Down at 20:00?  Or earlier.  Not awake until 6:00.

Dreams.  Discussing some things, the past, the Navy, how things happened, what happened.  There are still things I simply don't know, don't understand.  Maybe just the heart, the shutdown of it, initially, was so fast and nearly absolute.  Confusion.  Memories that they say aren't real, yet treatment for those false memories?  Diagnosis of those?  I can't tell you what I am not certain about.  All I know is I should be quiet about anything in there.  If the official line is that it was false, trying to suggest otherwise is nothing but trouble.  Check.

I did finish the roast yesterday.  It was tasty, but damn is it chewy.  I'm thinking ribeye tasting shoe leather.  The suggestion was to cut it thin.  I didn't.  Next time I will definitely cut it thinner, a lot thinner.  Not sure the imbedded garlic did it any favors?  I won't do that again.  I thought I loved garlic.  And, maybe I do, in some things.  But not in everything.  Though I will say I think the organic garlic was worth the trouble to obtain and spend to obtain.

Unlike the nuts.  I tried roasting those with less time.  I have tried them straight out of the packages.  They aren't good.  They don't taste roasted.  Old.  Were they frozen, then refrigerated, to extend their life, but lower their quality?  Far too expensive to throw away, but they can't be eaten.  So, no, not all organic is worth the price.  Few organic items are worth the cost.  Very few.

Snow.  More snow, I should say.  It has been snowing for the last three days.  Mostly melting off, save for slight increases in some places... over the patches where snow remained.  But, today, we got about two to three inches which stuck.  It isn't all that wet, but it isn't quite powder either.  I blend.  I cleared a part of the drive, and the sidewalk, plus a path along the whole of the driveway.  Not sure if UPS is supposed to arrive with a package today, but... wanted to open up what I could just in case that was the case.

Well... on to something.  A shower.  Dishes.  and some more cleaning, here and there.  Hopefully sweeping in the bathroom and hall, then mopping.  I had best sweep before showering, then mop after showering and setting up dishes.  Perhaps workin on clearing the kitchen table after that?  And, just maybe, sweeping in the kitchen... or more, clearing the floor to then sweep, perhaps tomorrow.

I am hoping to get a good deal more set up, cleared, and cleaned this week.

Sassy is hungry.  Best get her some chow.

Nope!

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No major issue.  It just really wasn't recycling day.  I gave it until mid afternoon, then brought the recycling bin back in.  I saw them empty the trash bin, so had already brought that back much earlier.  All good.

I haven't been able to do much.  I did get the hammock, and all else save the tarp, back in, and either set to air dry or given a very short warming dry in the dryer, on the lowest setting.  So that will be ready if the weather cooperates.  I could sleep out there, in the weather.  It wasnt' that bad.  It's, just... for my first shot I don't want to, especially with the wind coming from the north, mostly, right into one of the openings.

I washed my various compression stockings last night.  I wanted to see if the washing machine, on delicates, with the socks in washing bags for delicates, would work.  And, yes, it looks like it.  Darker socks and else first.  Then lighter colored ones this morning.  Then I hung them up to air dry on a portable, foldable, rack... in the bathroom where there was more room, and so that wouldn't get in my way while working with the bulky camping gear back there.

Some of them are dry, and have been collected, and paired if necessary.  More to go.  But they should be done by bedtime.  I meant to put some compression socks on, but they were all in, or about to go into, the wash this morning.  Tomorrow.

Oh, and I did look up ideas on how to cook the sirloin tip roast.  And, I got busy on that.  Garlic, pealed (and slightly crushed for my part), put into slits in the meat, top and bottom.  Onions, sliced into thirds, put on top.  The meat was salted and peppered, and given an hour for that to tenderize it a bit.  It... does.  The all in, with butter on top, the onions in that.

I went 450 for fifteen minutes, on both sides, to sear it.  Then lowered the temp to 325, I believe (F, of course).  I hooked up an internal thermometer with an outside reader.  I also set an alarm for forty five minutes.  Aparently this roast makes for excellent sliced deli sort of meat, for hot or cold sandwiches.  Not sure I would use it all that way, but would like to try some that way.

Good also as a simple roast.  A bit tough, so longer and slower cooking seems to do best.  I am curious how this will turn out.

Not much else for work.  I am rather tired, not doing the best.  A shower, perhaps, this afternoon?  Perhaps setting up dishes after?  If I get that far, perhaps one run through of the dishes before bedtime?  All maybes.  I'd like to get all that going, even some would be good.

Tomorrow?  I am hoping to mop the bathroom and the hall to it.  Perhaps sweeping them both first, again, just to... clear things.  Then mopping.  As well, dishes could get going, perhaps finishing what I may start tonight.  Then going through another set.  I'll be nearly caught up by then.

Oh, as well, I have been using the essential oil infuser to help with the scent around here.  I have noticed that most people have... something somthing going on in their houses.  I think, for the most part, naked houses are... stinky.  It doesn't matter if a good wife lives there, or a very clean family.  People, and our processes, food, trash, laundry, else... well?  We... smell.  So, yeah.  A bit of odor care really does help.

I'll check on the roast.  Won't peek, until the alarm goes off.  But can look through the glass, see what temperature it is.  I am taking it to 125 F.  Then I'll pull it.  It may well get up to 135 resting.  I will find out.  Curious, for future cooking.  Not all work the same.  Size and shape, weather conditions, humidity... all can play an impressive roll in changing things.  But... one can get a general feel for these things, over time.  Every meal is an experiment, even if it's not supposed to be.

I... finally did.

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Or?  I gave it a first shot.  I didn't stay, but I went, for a while.

Hmm, you ask?  Ah.  Outdoors, in the winter, in the hammock, with a tar over of course.  I did use the underquit, the handwoven ridgeline I crafted a while back, my double sleeping bag, if I thought there was another part to it?, and... I think that was it.  I set it all up, with some y.t. help, last evening.

Staying light so late these days, I wasn't in it until after taking the trash to the curb, even then a few hours more along.

There were, are, problems.  The underquilt isn't on... perfectly.  I couldn't get into the sleeping bags, and zip them up well.  The whole hammock is too high.  And... other problems.  But, I was doing it.  Doing well in it, to be honest.  I think it was about 25 during most of the sleep, with between a breeze and a wind from the northwest by north, as much more northerly than not by far.  And it was snowing.

The way I have the attachment pole set up, the wind and snow were blowing in.  The pole is cemented, so it's... not... something I could really change, or very easily.  So, it was what it was.  Now, I could probably have altered a few things, regarding set up, which would have helped.

I did readjust the whole thing two or three times.  The problem, in part, was I didn't initially know what was wrong.  I just, as a first timer even, initimated that something was not as I would wish it.  So, not fully understanding the problem, finding a solution was going to be a luck thing, mostly.  I did not get lucky, punk.  At least I still have my head attached.

Now that I know what the problem is, finding a solution will still be a bit of a trick.  It's just not that simple.  Solutions are engineered, not just known, not scientifically solved.  Science can't wipe it's own ass, it certainly can't solver a rigging problem.  And I have little interest in theorizing why it isn't work, or what my solve it.  I merely wish to fix it, and will... through engineering.

Still, I did well.  Even with all the problems, I slept warmly enough, on my side, in a half fetal position.  Pulling the sleeping bag parts up around me enough, putting on a cap, and using my plastic houseshoes... which I wore out there... as pillows?  Yea, they worked well enough.

My problem?  I had to pee.  I always, or often, usually really, have to pee at night.  Two or three or ten times.  I had nothing out there.  I suppose I could have just peed off to some side, or out in the yard, or... such.  But that wouldn't work long term.  To be honest, I may need to have a pee jug out there, rigged to hang from a branch or such, and use that.  Again, really, an engineering problem.

Still?  Proof of concept, for me.  Even with so many things wrong, and something important lacking, I was able to sleep out there, rather comfortably!  I will be..; working on teh rigging, sorting the pee jug, practicing with the sleeping system, and doing else.  But, yes, I can do it without freezing to death, or sleeping miserably.  At least in the 30s.

I will bring the kit in, today, sometime, and put in in the dryer on the lowest heated setting.  Just to dry it out a whiff.  Though, if snow and rain and wind are continuing from the north, I won't go out.  I'll pull everything, dry it all, and put the experiment on hold until there are better circumstances.  I suppose I could try to jerryrig a door, or closure to the north.  But, I... think that would be noisey as hell and would be very tricky to get right.  There are tents with end closure options.  I am looking at those.  Add privacy too.

Still.  I did it!  This is, finally, a start on making the dream that drove me out here real.  The dream of winter camping up in the mountains.  If I push through, at make it out this winter?  I'll be very cautious, speak with the rangers.  The chances of an avalanche, even on places which are normally safe, is extremely high.  So, caution is the better part of valour, in this case.  I don't wish to die out there.  Though, there is always risk.  Mountain lions, bears, avalanches... people.  Life simply isn't safe.  If too, most people die fifteen miles from home.  Which... why?  Just move!  All I'm saying.

Still, finally, a start.

It is still snowing, from time to time, this morning.  It didn't, mostly, stick to the driveway.  But it is gathering on the old snow and what grass had found it's way clear.  There is probably two inches from when it stopped melting and started being able to gather again.

Oh, one note, about sleeping in sleeping bags.  If you want to get a trunk, torso, workout?  Sleep in a hammock.  It just... does something.  From the short time I was in, I think two hours, my midriff is... a bit sore.  Why?  I can't say, for certain.  I only know what I know.  Sleeping in a hammock will tighten your abs.  Absolutely no doubt about that.  Just for that reason, I am stoked to figure out the other problems and get back in the saddle.  Some pain is... preferred.

Not much.

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No shower, no dishes.  A few coffees...  Kept up on water...  Fed, watered, and tended the litter box for Sassy...  Not much.

It is snowing and cold.  Well, 36 and lower.  I think 36 was around the high.  It has been snowing most of the day in any event.  It hasn't been sticking, mostly melting.  But, as it gets colder tonight, perhaps it will stick.  A pleasant day, mostly.

I did get the trash and recycling out.  Hmm, I don't think it is recycling tomorrow.  Oh well.  Better safe than sorry.

It is still light out there!  Even with the snow, and of course being densely overcast.  So strange.  I probably should be, normally, in the 40s to 60s, not the mid 30s down.  The water should be good, if they don't spill it all.  May have to, I get that.  But shouldn't if they don't need to.  Can't trust the bastards, not even in a red state, for whateve that means these days.

Oh, it's about bedtime though.  A different sleep arrangement, for the night.  I'll... write about it soon.  Goodnight?  To whom?  I... don't know.  Nobody visits anymore, most can't.  Those who can, don't.

Oh, but I did call my mother.  Since she called the other day.  I won't generally call her, unless she calls first.  I gave her some advice about a frog, in her throat.  Vinegar, in water.  Perhaps with a touch of salt.  Experiment with doses, vinegars, give it a try.  It might not work, if her's is a respiratory illness, though maybe.  I texted my brother but heard nothing back.  I didn't think I would.  Yes, goodnight.  If just to me.

Up late.

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I didn't go to bed late, or all that late.  Between 20:00 and 21:00, I think?  But, I took two long trips to town, did some heavier cleaning, went to mass, and... other things?  It... was a longer harder day.  And, I am tired from the rest of the week.  Right down to a very sore, hurting, heart.

I didn't wake, finally, until 5:30.  I only got up then because I felt it was very late.  And, as per my recent schedule, it is.  It was about two hours later than the recent usual.  Still... not terrible.

I fed Sassy first thing.  If I wake at 3:00 to 4:00, I'll wait an hour or two.  But if I don't wake until 5:30 or later, I'll feed her first thing.  Just... trying to play fair with her.  Cats are very regular animals.  I think most animals are, once they become... domesticated to within their capacity.  Though cats would push it, at times, if they could.  They will try to wake you earlier, to get food.  Which is why I usually don't feed them for a few hours after waking.  It removes the immediate payoff of waking me.  And, that actually works well with them.  If I could just wake on a regular schedule.

I have never been good at that.  Nighttime allowed me to... be who I was, or wanted to be, potentially without interuption, punishment, brutality.  The... training, to be who I was supposed to be, was brutal.  So, yeah.  If there may have been health issues involved even back then, too?  Maybe.  But, with the heart added on, keeping days and nights, save for short periods of time, is... literally impossible.  Especially when I work.

Oh, while I have given up on Japanese... the call to it diminished beyond my ability to sustain the effort... I am thinking of attempting to learn Spanish.  More Argentinian Spanish, but alos try to dip my toes into Mexican Spanish.  There are... many reasons.

The hope of moving to Argentina, or visiting.  And maybe Ecuador?  But, too, many locals and Catholics speak Spanish.  There would be some opportunities.  And, depending on which Spanish they speak at the masses for the Spanish ones, that would be an oportunity to learn... hear and learn.  And make new friends.

What a day.

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I think I wrote about this morning's work.  So, yea, that.  After that, a shower.  Then to town.

Grocery shopping.  At two of my stores.  One more tomorrow.  The garlic I bought last time just didn't have much flavor.  So I am trying organic, from the local health food store.  It didn't smell all that strong.  Didn't have an odor at all.  Meats, butter, this, and that.  Veggies too.  At the wholer food store, I bought nuts, garlic, and some spices.  Gotta watch it in there.  One bag will be $2.50, or $4.25 or such.  Not bad for a decent little pouch of spices.  But then another one will be $15, or even $30?  Crazy.  No.

I also stopped at a shop for shoe laces.  I had hoped for 54" and maybe 56" or 58".  But, no.  It went from 54" to 60".  Could cut them down, as the shoe floor worker suggested, but you loose the end.  And the boots I want them for need that end.  They have hard tubes, that make putting a longer lace through nearly impossible.  Hmm... I may try those 60" laces, next time I am in town.

I got home.  Realized I forgot coffee.  Since I was going out for mass, I hit the coffee shop.  I... may have to find alternatives.  They are now selling them for $17, and only for 12 ounces.  No, that's far too expensive.  I'll buy them for now, but be looking for good coffee at better prices.  That is just way too much.

And I made it to mass.  I am exhausted, wiped, tired, and to the point of pain, in the heart.  Still, a good day.  I'll get on to bed before too long.  I may roast some of those nuts, raw nuts, before bedtime.  Gotta just keep it to some at a time though.  I bought pecans (less expensive than amazon) for equivalent quality.  Walnuts as well.  I'll only back about a half pound at a time.  Or I'll eat them far too fast, far too often.  Oh, but I truly love simple, unsalted, roasted raw nuts.  Ugh.

I saw a roast on sale, a very good sale.  Not sure I will like it.  Will look to see if there are any special instructions for this roast, then hit it tomorrow, or Monday.  Hoping it is good.  If it is, I may get several of them the next time I am in.  And I need cherry tomatoes and lemons from my other store.  On a decent sale.

I have trash out, ready to go.  Just two bags of recycling, but it isn't recycling week.  That was last week.  No worries, plenty of room left for that.

It got up to 48 today!  Crazy.  The forecasts were all so very, very, bad... the ones I watched.  Nothing matched up.  No where near as much snow as suggested.  And far warmer than suggested.  I watched two different stations' forecasts, for generally the region.  Horrible.  Even a cave man could have done better.

Ugh.  Tired.  But I do want to roast some of those nuts, pecans I believe, tonight.  But that only takes the time to warm up the oven to 350, then to toast them about twelve minutes.  I can leave them out to cool.  No worries there.  A good day.  But I need to sleep, and take it easy for a few days.

It looks like, if health holds, I can make it to both the KoC meeting, and the other meeting.  I have found the paperwork, to put in for potential membership in the other group.  We'll see if it is enough or not.  Meh.  I'll watch vids, while the oven heats and nuts roast.  

I wasn't sure I'd get to anything.

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I was sore, in the heart, tired in it too, this morning.  I mean, as in ill from it.  I was considering going back to bed.

I had a bite to eat, the last of the boiled eggs.  Coffee as well, the last of it.

I then played games and browsed the web.  I couldn't... stay focused, with either.  Kept going back and forth.  

Finally something changed.  I didn't feel better, but gaming and browsing were annoying and I couldn't get back to sleep.  So I started doing things in this front room.  Moving boxes, sorting, moving chairs, and more.  Mostly trying to get to the floor.  Which, for the most part, I did.

To the floor in order to sweep.  I cleared one area, tearing down some boxes, sorting others.  When that area was clear, I swept.  Then moved things back, only in a much better arrangement.  I finished the room, as... far as I can at this point.  Boxes will have to be gone through.  Some things tossed, some things sorted and stored.  But I did some of that as I was going, tossing the easy things.  Very nice.  Truly.

Then I got in to the bathroom hall.  I will admit I was slightly afraid of that.  Still, I got to it.  Had to sit for most of that, and as much as this room, as I could.  But, I did break everything down, tossed much, recycled some, and it is now clear.  I swept the bathroom and the hall very well.  But mopping is sorely needed, for both if the hall needs it the absolute most.

Very good.  I am quite pleased with that.  I thought to hit dishes, but I needed a shower.  I got to that, showering after trimming my whiskers.  I even shaved when I was finished.  Short hair is so much easier to tend.  No two or three washes, and a conditioning or two.  Just one of each, usually.  I even think I wash much better.  Why?  I can't say.  But one wash and rinse is usually good enough.  And I have been working lately.  Sweating even.  One wash was good.

Oh, but too, now that I have the water softener working, that is helping a lot.  I initially had it on 120 hardness?  Way too much.  I slowly titrated down, finally getting to 30, then 25?  20?  I may cut it just a bit more.  Thankfully, it doesn't make the tub slick.  It does, at times, make my hands slick, seemingly difficult to rinse.  But not dishes, or as mentioned the tub floor.  As well, it should make the reverse osmosis system components last much longer.

After the shower, a shave.  Not the closest finest shave I have ever tried.  And, yet, I think it came out as well as when I tried up, down, left, and then right (just did down, up, then a bit along the chin).  A bit of baby lotion on after, and it's... good.  Now to get more properly dressed.  Why?  Why not.

I think I am finished with work for the day.  Not sure what I can do.  Who knows.  I... might read something?  I'll think on it. 

Up at about 2:30.

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I had to think.  Went to bed at 17:00, pretty much exactly.  My mom called at 21:xx?  I didn't check, until I woke up.  Didn't know who was calling at the time.  Couldn't even roll over to check it.  Found out this morning.  Or, maybe I looked later in the night?  Maybe.

A tornado hit, where the last woman lives... lived?  I haven't heard from her in... a long while.  Have called.  No response.  From the looks of things, it didn't hit where she had been living.  And, it doesn't look all that bad?  But I haven't seen casualty reports.  Usually they breathlessly spew how many died, were wounded, or are missing.  So I'm thinking probably not many, if any?

My mother is the bringer of bad news.  Not... saying... that is a problem.  But... if there is bad news, she is first to report it.  It's... a quality, of sorts.  Of course, every time she calls I... have that in the back of my mind.  Especially later at night, or at odd times.  She's not just a hobbiest, she's a pro at that!

My heart hurts.  Something is wrong.  Not sure why though.  I took yesterday off, pretty much.  Oh, I did a few things.  Cooked a few (if very light) meals, and lightly gamed and serfed the internet.  Too tired to do much else.  Even so, I will try to do a bit of work today.

A few more boxes where found.  Some areas could be swept, front room and bathroom.  Working on the bathroom hall might take place.  Oh, and finishing laundry, and starting back in on dishes after a shower.

A bite to eat this morning.  The last of the boiled eggs and coffee or tea.  Nothing fancy, but that is pretty good.  Rightly fed and pastured chickens, fed without soy, produce some of the finest eggs one can buy.  I may ask for two dozen, rather than one, this week.  So I can fry some and boil some.  Loverly.  Plus, eggs go well on salad, and make very good salad on their own... of a different sort... potato salad, really, to my mind, without the potato.

On to... something.  Breakfast, I think.

Not as much as had been hoped.

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Breakfast lunch and dinner though!  It's a lenten Friday, so no meats.  No bacon, no burger, just eggs and salad.  Fried eggs this morning.  An, actually, very good salad for lunch... lettuce of course, cheddar cheese, capers, artichoke hearts (chopped a bit), and the homemade blue cheese dressing.  Very very good.  Then, later, eggs with a remaining, precooked potato.  Sliced, fried with onion and garlic, with well blended eggs over the top.  Food was pretty good for being meatless.

Then I received packages.  First, the air fryer, from the recall.  I called the new owner of that, and they were just coming in to town anyway, so they picked it up.  As well, I had sheets that should fit their bed.  New ones I didn't use.  So I set them up fairly well that way.  And showed off some of my new tools.  Nothing he doesn't have, or better.  But... tools are good conversation items for us.  Well, maybe one tool that was... attention getting.  He still has similar, and just as good, if not quite as exacting?  Though he does have a lot more tools, and some of them really sharp.  Still, tools are a... draw... for both of us.

As well, I received the jacket.  Instead of going down just one size, from two extra large to one extra large, I went to large... if in tall.  It fits, well.  Hoping it doesn't shrink in the wash though.  That is... amazing, to me.

I also got for cases of carbonated water.  I got that stowed.  Couldn't shower.  Couldn't get more work done.  Could barely game, or stay awake.  Had hoped to make it out tonight, to a church event.  But I just can't.  I am crashing.

Some snow, and rain, pretty much all day.  Though it got to 38 F, last I looked about an hour ago.  Crazy.  Everything that had accumulated seems to have gone, and more as well.

I have been looking at techniques for the flattop grill.  Food ideas.  I may end up doing a lot of my cooking on it.  As much to cook out in the open air as for the types of food which that makes easier to cook.  Done right, it is a very keto friendly cooking item.  Looking at tools I may not have, as well.  I probably need squirt bottles, maybe a heating rack.  Though perhaps a cookie cooling rack would do?  Pretty big, so I don't know.  Will see.

Crashing so hard.  Been crashing for a while.  I did let some folks know I couldn't make it tonight.  Hoping for tomorrow.  Yes.  I think I'll go on to bed.  But, on the good side, I have kept on top of things.  Clearing, cleaning, even washing the dishes, pans, and such, I have used through the day.

I didn't do more dishes that are in the wings, though.  But I did get two loads of laundry through.  The last is in the dryer.  The other has been folded, but is back in the wash room still.  I try.  

Found a cooking tool I... had meant to use long ago.

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While I have a food processor, or two.  And many modern tools for cooking.  I have been collecting the... old, and even ancient, tools.  From a hand crank mixer, to mashers and ricers, a small mortar and pestle, attempting to collect metal, steel, stainless, measuring cups and measuring spoons, plus glass measuring items.  I want... backups.  For if power goes out, or... any of a number of things, really.  As well as for health.  Glass and stainless are better, usually.

A molcajete was purchased... some... long time ago.  A year?  No, more like two, or three, years ago.  I have dug down to it, several times.  It just was never uncovered long enough to remember and attempt to use.  I need to use rice, or rock salt, in it first.  Though, last night, I tried to use it without doing those things.

It's a much bigger mortar and pestle.  Heavier.  Made of lava rock.  Pumice, or somesuch.  A heavier type of it, or a sister type of rock.  Very abrasive, very heavy, interesting.  I'll get working on it, see what I can do, now that I found it.

The one thing?  It takes a LOT of work to grind things in it.  Then again, my first shot with it was without setting it up by scouring rice or rock salt through it, and what I was working on was mustard seeds.  I am sure guacamole should be easier?  We'll see.  After clearing it out, that is probably the first thing I will try with it.  I'll look for the best tomatoes and avocado I can find, and... whatever else might go well in it.

I have been working on dicing onions in smaller and smaller bits, as with fresh garlic.  So far I haven't felt that it really helped with flavor or texture.  Though, to be honest, I often like larger chunks onion.  The garlic I bought was from Florida, or so it said.  It has some flavor, but not... as much as I would like.  May try it from the whole foods store.  Last time I was there, I didn't see any.

However, my cutting skills are improving.  If I find better items, or look how to cook better with these items, I should do well.

And, as a last thing, on the cooking front, I ordered a flattop grill today.  I wanted one last year.  I ordered one.  But it just didn't work.  Plus, that one didn't have the grill under the flattop, as it was advertised.  This one definitely does.  It is still cold out there, but I can get to grilling things.

I have learned how to make keto pancakes, with a batter.  And, I would like to work on omelets, bacon, sausages, and smash burgers.  I am heading more into the carnivore diet.  If I don't mind a veggie or two finding it's way into my food, on it, next to it.  Never thought I'd say that, to be honest.  But veggies aren't bad, if... they aren't nearly as nutritious or good for you as they said they were.  But they... do add... variety.  And, if careful with choosing, and preparing, they can be... okay.

Yes, I am beginning to get back into cooking.  Doing fascinating things, like kefir, the creme fraiche, homemade mayo and dressings, and other such.  And, really, the deeper you go, the cheaper it really gets.  And, it lasts well if you do it right.  The French don't have it perfect, but they are much closer than much of the rest of the world.  High fats, natural simple fats, and everything in moderation.  Smaller bites!  I am... trying to learn, I am learning.  I am doing.  I am eating so much better.

I honestly feel like I just ate at a fancy restaurant.  Well, when I did it right.  Actually, there are no American restaurants which make food both good, and right.  They all add soy and other debauched oils, chemicals, and whatever it takes to create a flavor profile.  They don't care about health, or anything but taste and profits.  I do care, and I do watch.  I am changing my tastes to match what is affordable, healthy, and right.  And still amazed how inexpensively that can be done.

Sardines, sometimes, are a bit of a push.  As are a few other things. Working on it.  At least I truly enjoy liver, even kidney now.  One thing at a time.

Ah, another thing.

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I had been expecting a lot of snow.  As well, cold weather, and wind.  As I was changing Sassy's water, I decided to check.  First, I realized there wasn't much wind last night, and didn't hear any this morning.  So, that was out, probably.  While checking, I didn't sense any real wind.  Air movement?  If so, light.

The snow did fall, but it didn't, mostly, stick.  The drive is clear, save a few areas where the snow did stick, along lines... cracks... but closer to the house.  The vast majority of the driveway, and anything I would drive on, is clear.  More wet than snowy.

As well, it is 30 F out there.  Which, while not warm by any standard, certainly isn't a cold dive.  The forecasts weren't good.  Perhaps they are a day off?  Two?  Who knows.  Will find out.  Now, I myself expect more snow, and cold weather, for a while.  At least until the middle of the month, and possibly if more mildly and infrequently until mid May, or even early June.

The snowfall totals, I think around SLC, I heard, were 750 inches so far this year.  But, they are pretty sure we will get to 800 inches.  Now, that can't all be on the ground currently.  That would be 62.5'.  No way could that all be on the ground.  And 800 inches would be 66.6'.  Ah, I see why the newsroom was so excited for 800 inches.  Seriously, evil.  Though, truth be told, that is just a number.  But you can't tell the evil worshippers that.  Anyone paid to knowingly lie, who goes along with that, in any state or nation, is evil.  What does Christian tradition say about lying?  Yea.  Anyway... and even so... that is a lot of snow.  Don't worry, they will find a way to memory hole and dump it.  Even Utah has become... questionable.  They want drought.  Unless they can have flooding and then drought again.  They... really hate us, top down.

But, yea.  No serious snow.  Not two to four feet, no one to four inches.  Probably more rain than snow.  No seriously cold weather.  No winds.  Or... not yet.  It could come.  It... will come, most likely.  Just not when the various sources I reviewed suggested.

Yes, awake.

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Down right before 21:00.  Why I was awake so late I can't say.  Maybe because I had to push to get things done, and later in the day, I simply couldn't get to bed... had to come down off the pushing and shoving.  But I did get the compressor filled, the filter cleared, the vacuuming done (what I could get to), and a shower taken.  So... at least it was fruitful pushing and shoving.

I woke at about 3:30.  A bit before, in minutes, but memory isn't absolutely clear.  All good though.  I set a timer for an hour and an half, so that I don't forget to feed Sassy.  She was rather... fussy this morning.  Not sure why, but she really wanted to eat, and was acting up.  I made it completely clear that such behavior would not be tolerated.  

Not sure why, either.  I fed her right before bedtime, as usual.  Only, bedtime was much later.  Ah!  Irregularity.  Cats prefer things to be on a clock, regular, timely.  When things go off in the wrong direction, they can... get fussy.  And Sassy is more by clock and regularity than even most other cats I have had.  Yea, okay.  I had... just forgotten.  While I have been slipping, it has been a slow slip, until yesterday.  That was a six hour slip, rather than a few forward or back.

Today?  A shower shortly, just to get things kicked off.  Being Friday, and in lent, no meat today.  I think eggs are okay.  I had been planning corned beef hash with it, but had to change that.  Eggs will do.  No bacon either.  Tobasco sauce will help, and an extra egg.  If hungry a bit later, I will have a salad, maybe with boiled eggs.

There may be a supper tonight.  I think they are doing the stations of the cross, again.  I can't do that again.  Hopefully next year I will be in better shape for that?  I... wouldn't mind doing that each Friday of lent, if that is how it goes.  I'm just not in shape to do that this year.

Dishes, today, after the shower.  Set up at least.  But, with the freezertop clean and clear enough to put out some loads, that should be easier.  I may even be able to finish dishes today.  Best look, may have to put some dry dishes away.  Thought that shouldn't be a problem.  

I think water is caught up, but Sassy needs fresh water.  I have moved her to a smaller water bowl, but change it much more frequently.  And, use r.o. water.

As well, I would like to do a bit more cleaning in a few rooms.  sorting a few boxes in the living room, moving and opening the front... computer... this... room.  And, maybe, sweeping the bathroom, clearing the bathroom hallway, and maybe clearing some of the table top.

As well, food items need to be taken downstairs.  So many things to do.  Even if I finish these things, so many more things to do.  But... I... think this is possible.  Not, maybe, as fast as I am writing it.  :)  How much I can do in a day is something else.  I just don't know.  But, if I can get a few hours a day, plus upkeep, I... can get there.  Four hours a day?  I could fly.  Six, eight, hours?  Even an half hour at a time, three to ten times a day, or more... it could go fast, if I can keep at it.  I'll... see.

Had my first morning kefir.  Just a cup.  I'll probably have another, to make room for the freshly fermented kefir.  Then get a shower.  After that, either have fried eggs, or do some work.

And, I did make mustard this morning.  I don't know if it was worth the cost and effort.  It has to set overnight.  Well, I am letting it set on the counter just a bit, to see if there is enough fluid to mix it all.  In a bit I will give it another healthy stir.  If it looks good, I'll put in the fridge.  It is supposed to be very shelf stable, and last a very long time.  I will find out, in time.

Ugh.  I need to sit after those things.  Then I'll get the shower, dishes, and eggs.

AI response?

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No one reads here.  And, yet, responses?  I think so.  As mentioned, artificial intelligence, or some algorithm type of system?  Maybe.  Or... someone can either see, even now... or can see what I am looking at?

A few last things.

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Things done.  And, one more to go.

I air blasted the filter, then put on a filter cover.  Vacuuming the living room after that was completed.  Not... the whole room.  Just what has been opened.  Still, what isn't open isn't all that bad.  It will get it too, in time, though probably with the regular vacuum cleaner.  Still, it's much better in there.

Then I reset kefir.  I have two half gallon jugs in the fridge.  I did have a cup of the stuff.  It wasn't as cool as I like it, but it was nice to have in any case.  I miss it when I mess up and have to reset from scratch.  Still, I have the process down and can get it back to trim in a week, or a week and a few days.  I don't like spending the thirty dollars.  But, now that I am saving grains, and freezing them,  I shouldn't have to worry about that, probably.  Assuming they do freeze for up the three months, or even more?

Though, if that is the case, I will begin pulling them at two and a half months, and restoring them.  Replacing what I pull with other grains.  It's... a whole system, or money after money.  For me it is worth the effort.  Though, if I fail, I will just have to order more.

The last thing I want to do is get a shower.  Should be easy.  After the shower I will take the towel in, with the rest of the whites, and start that wash.

Ah, and it was 34 out there earlier.  When I was out working with the compressor it had dropped to 32, but it sure felt colder.  And it started snowing.  That is sort of what was suggested.  It is supposed to snow the next few days, possibly a lot.  I thought they suggested up to two feet, in the valley?  That seemed like a lot, but this winter it is very possible.  Probable?  I'll find out soon enough.

I am definitely tired.  I haven't worked as much as I had thought I would, or wanted.  I did do some reasonable little bits of work, hit some of the goals, and will finish the last thing I can do shortly, going to bed clean and worn.  How I prefer it.  I'm betting we do get a lot of snow though.  And, no, this still isn't the last of it.

Ah...

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I need to get the air compressor plugged in, and get to work on the filter.  Plus find the filter covers.  Yes, slow, but... yes.

I called the college, about obtaining a swim pass.  It is $55 a semester.  Thankfully, it is prorated.  So, for the final bit of the semester, to May 8th, it would be $18 dollars.  I... can do that.  They will be closed for a couple of weeks, this summer, but that is fine.  I hope to get in tomorrow, or Monday, to get that arranged.

I made a breakfast.  Wasn't really happy with it.  An omelet, with onions, burger, mushrooms, and garlic... fresh onions and garlic.  Oh, and cheese.  It just... wasn't very tasty, I must admit.  No, the eggs were good, the ingredients were fresh.  It's... my skills, or tastes.  Perhaps I just don't like omelets?  I love fried eggs, usually.

Even if I haven't gotten to much else, yet?  I love walking through my house.  Seeing the more open spaces, the clean areas, realizing that things are happening.  The right type of things.  I am tired.  Exhausted.  Still, I am trying to do a few little things here and there.

My days and nights are being turned around.  I have been awake until right about this time, 15:00 or so, for the last three days.  I may push a bit longer today, in order to clean out the filter, perhaps do some vacuuming with that vacuum, and to get a shower.  Very good.  I hope.

I had wanted to get out, and have a meal at the Black Onion... a mixed oriental shop.  I do like their meals, and they are affordable.  I just couldn't get out today.  If I get out tomorrow, or Monday, I will stop in.  I have... gained a bit of a sweet tooth regarding their restaurant.

Haven't heard from mom or my brother since the very first week of the month.  I won't... bother them.  I tried mom.  She... avoided me.  I won't call if she doesn't want to talk.  Not sure what I might have said or done.  I... guess it's just the way things go.  We are going our own way, I guess.

Life is improving.  I am trying to get things going.  I'll see, in time.  Either things are improving, or I am dying and just don't see it coming.

A bit going on.

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I had hoped to have a bunch of things done by now.  Actually, by six or eight.  But, no.  I just couldn't get going.  I was becoming afraid I was done before I started.  I turned up the heat, made a coffee... or two.  Thought about breakfast, but that just wasn't going to happen.  No, I just had to see if I could get to things, in time.

And, yes, I did.  A bit.  Two loads of dishes, and change.  Washed, rinsed, then the freezertop had to be cleaned, so that was done.  A bit of work, more than it sounds.  But, done.  Then I finished the dishes, dried them, and set them to air dry.  More than it seemed, at first.  But, too, done.

I really wanted to hit the counters.  But that seemed like an impossible amount of work.  And the stovetop.  So much there, to be moved, sorted, cleaned, removed, replaced.  Well, and so much chaos.  Too much to face?

I hit the stovetop.  It... went well enough.  Yes, I had to move and sort things.  Ugh.  Clean.  I was thinking of stopping there.  But, I thought, just one counter.  The far corner one?  Sure.  It went pretty well.  Cleared, cleaned, things washed a bit then put back if they were meant for there.  I... wanted to quit about then.

But, no.  No, no, no.  It was going well.  Easy.  Quick.  Pleasant results.  No, I wouldn't quit there.  I'd see how far I could get.  So, a fresh washpan of hot sudsy, with my tools, and... to it.  The first counter was a bit of a mess.  But it got done.  I think that is where the smell, bad odor, was coming from.  Not sure what made that mess.  Was Sassy up there?  Do something?  I don't know.

I cleaned that area, to the shine or what of the shine remains on the old bits and parts.  Then to the first sink, second sink, and finally to the last counter.  The last sink and counter were the worst.  Lots of stuff.  Some clean, some dirty, some being used (coffee and tea), water heater, lots of stuff.  But, cleared, washed to the shine, things replaces, or some of the things.

Now, to figure out where to put some of the things I removed.  Sprouting bins, a few canning tools, and... such.  I'll... figure this out as I go.

So, so far this week, I have cleared the boxes (and there were a ton... filled the hatch on my suv, and part of the back seat), cleared much of the living room floor.  Not... all of it.  Just a nice swath.  With trash being separated as I go.  Then, now, the dishes... or digging into them.  The counters in the kitchen, including the freezertop.

I might dig through the top of the refrigerator, next time I can work.  And set up more dishes.  Laundry is pretty much caught up?  Well, it might be time to hit them again.  Towels and colors... cotton... anyway.  I need a shower too.  Oh, and I will see if I can get the air compressor going today, so as to clean out the filter from the shop vac.  And, get that going the next time I work.  Ugh.

Quite a feast of work.  Only... working in half hour to now hour spots at a time.  Sitting for a few, if needed.  Like now.  Really hitting things.  Not because I want to hit them.  I always want to work.  But because, for now, I can hit them.  

I am hoping, if I can get the compressor working, to hit vacuuming either yet today, or tomorrow.  Then, hit the bathroom tomorrow.  I have been keeping up on the toilet and sink, mostly.  But sweeping, mopping, and clearing a bit in there would be good.  I am mostly keeping it clear, save for dishes.  But those are being done.  Hmm, if I can get a shower today, I'll put another couple of loads in to soak, hitting them before bedtime perhaps.  That should be most of the dishes?  I have between two and four dishpans left.  I do them two at a time, so I don't balk and crash from sensory overload.

A good day.  If the start was very late.

A few weeks of catching up.

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All... well... all the boxes I could find... in the front room, and kitchen... were broken down, loaded up, and taken in yesterday.  As well, I had a piece of equipment from xfinity, rent being paid on it, but wasn't functional for me.  That got loaded and returned.  An amazon jacket that was far too big was sent back.  And... something else?  But, too, I had a meal out, while out.  Some tacos at a "Mexican" chain.  Not bad, but... not original.  Commercial.

I got everything where it needed to go, then returned.  As well, the day before, I went through a lot of things in the living room.  Boxes were sorted.  Still more sorting to go, but much of the floor was cleared.  And more was tossed than last time.  Slowly... figuring that out.

I also found parts for the shop vac, so I can vacuum in there, or at least take out the worst of it.  Then hit it with the regular vacuum.  Eventually, probably, a steam vacuum run or two.  I need to clean out the filter.  Then get the shop vacuum going.  Further, I purchased filter covers which will make that far easier in the future, and have some ideas about how to clean that, and the filters, easier.  Will be trying several techniques today, hoping to get the vacuuming done.

Kicked out dishes, earlier in the week.  Have more set up.  I'll hit those while it is too dark and early to run the compressor, or power drills.  Waking folk up  this early is just plain rude.  After dishes, perhaps a shower.

Kefir is back on track.  I shifted through the storebought kefir, then am now into raw milk.  I have saved nearly three quarters of a gallon of the stuff.  One more ferment and I should be back to being able to drink some daily.  I am not going to be drinking as much.  Perhaps a quart and a half a day?  A little less.  But in that range.

As well, I made mayonnaise and creme fraiche this last week.  From those, and with some cream, and the blue cheese (which was still good, hadn't been opened) I made a blue cheese dressing and a ranch dressing.  Very good stuff.  And, with adding kefir, it really does last much longer!  And well.  It doesn't even get funky.  Oh, life is good with fresh, whole, real, foods.

I had hoped to get to church through the week.  That just wasn't possible.  Between still recovering from the stations of the cross, and the foot, and then hitting local work, plus the weather, I just... yesterday was the first day I was able to get out again.  Still, not bad, all in all.

I looked up swimming.  I think I might be able to afford the fees.  I'll check, to make sure I got the prices correct.  If so, I may start that up this month.  At least get the pass started, or set that up for next "semester"... or such.  

I remember how to get it going.  First, I go in for a half hour.  I... don't swim much.  I do a few laps, until I am too winded.  Then I rest as needed.  Then I swim more.  It takes a few times, weeks, a month maybe... to get to where I can swim most of that time.  Then I work on increasing my lap numbers and time, just... as things go.

When I can do an half hour swim, solid, then I go to an hour.  And, then, I do the same thing.  I swim as well as I can, until I can't.  Then I take breathers, rests, as needed.  I continue on until I can swim the full hour.  Then, again, I begin increasing my times and lap counts.

The best I got last time was swimming about a mile in an hour.  Pretty lame from when I was younger.  I could do three miles an hour, and even then that was just... taking it easy.  I could swim a bit faster, or so I believe now... and even then.  Not sure if I tested it, but I felt that I was dogging it.  Just... keeping trim.  But, who knows since I don't remember testing it.  I used to swim three times a week.  For now I may try to just hit twice a week, initially.  If the goal is three times a week, in time.  Well, that's the plan.

Anyway... Yea.  Things are up.  Will see if I can improve life, the old fashioned way.  Things are improving.  But the weather is still tough.  It has been as low as 9 F just a day or two ago.  If it is 30 last I checked a bit ago.  Snowing, but lightly.  May have turned to rain.  Supposed to get more snow this weekend.  As much as two feet.  And... it may turn cold again.  

As for snowpack?  We are at record levels.  They have been keeping records since 1980.  Crazy, would have thought they checked from long ago, but... no.  The only other time we have had snow pack like this was in 1983, followed by massive flooding.  Though, then, there was no meltoff until very late, then it hit 90 and all came down at once.  Better infrastructure to handle it, too.  But that is still a risk, regardless of what they say.  It is still rather cold, and already rather late.

The snow pack is actually heavier, at this point.  The questions are whether the pack will continuing adding and whether it will melt off slowly or fast.  The water content, if melted all at once, would be equivalent (currently) to four to five feet of water!  Serious snow pack, very serious.

Well... that... should make up for being too busy to blog in a bit.  Later.

She still haunts me.

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I have... written... pieces, parts.  But not ever, I think, have I put it all in one... phrase.  Yes, this will do.  No readers.  Isn't for you.

Nearly noon.

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Bits and pieces, through the night and morning.  Not... a lot.  Short work periods.  No heavy work.  But a lot of little things, between resting.  Couldn't really game.  That, too, takes energy.  I would rather do mechanical labor than game, but that isn't always an available option.

I didn't get a shower, but the tradeoffs were good.  I didn't get recycling gathered and out, but will.  I got much else I wanted, and a few more things.  The coffee seemed ready, this morning.  So I pulled the grains, which are in a nut milk bag, then put the liquid in the refrigerator.  As well, I reset kefir.  It is smelling off.  I don't understand.  How could it be off already?  Maybe it is just my perception.

I checked the creme fraiche, but that seems... off... too?  I just don't understand.  It has worked perfectly the last few times.  Very strange.

It snowed again last night.  Perhaps two more inches down, though there isn't a foot of snow on the ground anymore.  And some areas are finally becoming bare... of snow.  And it seems to be soaking in, which is greatly needed.  A few weeks, or even months, of a healthy soaking, and the aquifers, general surface water tables, and such should improve.

A bit more done.

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The chicken was baked.  This time I was very careful with doneness.  I looked up what temperature it needed to be, and kept measuring the temperature.  For chicken thighs, the temperature required is 165 F, but going to 185 isn't going to harm to chicken, or so several sources suggested.  I... don't trust those sources.  Overcooking food is simply not good.  I got it to between 160 and and 175.  Some of the thighs read much warmer and cooler.  Very odd.  Yes, I missed the bones and such.  Not sure why.

But the chicken, between brining, drying well, lightly spicing, and baking to the right temperature really came out well.  I had two, letting the other four cool then putting them up.  Bagged and refrigerated.

After a bit of time allowing it to digest, I boiled eggs.  I checked them first, to make sure there weren't any floaters.  Literally, if they are in deep enough water to fully submerge, if they float they are bad.  And, these were the oldest eggs I had on hand.  Which, actually, I find boil much better, and peel much easier.  If... my old eggs are probably as fresh as storebought eggs get, so there is that.

And they did peel quite well.  I put an inch or two of water in the bottom of a heavy bottomed pot, bring that to a boil, (usually, but not this time) turn the temp down from high to medium) and cover, let go for ten minutes, then dunk into a lot of cold or a bit of iced water.  I then give them fifteen minutes to cool and peel them.  They were done just slightly under completely done.  Perfect in my book.  I ate two, to test.  A smaller and larger one.  They were equally done, and just right.

As well, I put some of the dishes up that were drying.  Then worked on more that were soaking.  Those should be about ready.  I'll go in and check, probably just give them a very hot rinse, bring them out, dry them, and leave them to air dry.

I also got water reset and going again.  I should have two clean half gallon water jars, and may make another one for the fridge.  I do like cold water, even on cold days, once in a while.  I've been drinking too much carbonated water.  Not a problem, just more expensive.  So... yeah.

More coffee, through the night.  Trying to avoid sweetener.  So used to it, and such.  Sometimes I forget and add it.  Kefir may be reset yet tonight.  I dit set up another batch of creme fraiche.  And a lot of other little things.

Something smells truly terrible in the kitchen.  I have moved the trash bin, to see if that is what it is.  I can hope.  If not, perhaps something crawled under the floorboards, or is dead in the wall?  Ugh.  It's... pretty rough.  But just in one small area.  Can't smell it several feet away.  It was near where the trash bin was, which is why I moved it.  If the smell is gone yet tonight, and appear with the bin, I'll get the bag out.  Otherwise?  I don't know.  I suppose, tomorrow, I could go downstairs and see if there is something there, or... if I can look around, find the scent down there.  It smells like something dead.  I'll... figure it out.  No, not something that has been smelling like that for long.  It's new.  Ugh.  Might have thrown something out that was really bad, rancid, or something.  Not much in there, but... you never know.  I did pull the bag, to see if it was the bin, but no... it wasn't that.  Looked in some cabinets and drawers.  Didn't find it.  Though that doesn't mean it isn't there.  Ugh... scent, especially weak even if terrible scents, are tricky to track sometimes.

I did wash some pans.  One of which was... very dubious.  Might have been somthing bad in that one.  They are clean, so don't smell.  But what I scraped out of one of them might have been it.  I'll... just take the trash bag out.  There isn't much in it, but it isn't worth sparing a bag for the potential of it being the source of the odor.  Pew!

Still, not a bad thing.  I am doing little things, here and there.  Trying to get to more.  Liver won't be tonight.  But hamburger... getting that fried and put away would be good.  Though, if I do so, I might have a taco salad yet tonight.  Lots of meals, all rather small... and tasty.  As well, I'd like to get a shower tonight.  Perhaps to make it to mass tomorrow... early or late.

No promises.  And things are... a bit difficult.  I will see.