Another little hobby.

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Since sudoku is not going to improve all that much I thought a new hobby might have to be undertaken.  I still hit 5 second solves in sudoku regularly enough that I know it's not a complete fluke.  Further, 7 seconds is my new second fastest time.  I get 7, 8, and 9 second solves often enough, beyond having hit 5 seconds at least five times, that...  Oh, I suppose, I might, somehow, hit 4 seconds.  Maybe, in some madness, even 3 seconds.  But, really, I think I am... mostly... at a limit with sudoku.  So?  So, rubik's cube.  Now, I am learning, a bit at a time.  I'm not in a race, yet.  Perhaps I won't be able to learn the rhymes to solving the thing, or I may.

As to the rest of my plans?  The dishes were cycled.  Those which were in a rinse, or where the washing was quick and easy, those have been dried and put up.  The rest were set aside for my shower, which I took.  They are, even so back in for a final effort.  Let them soak for a bit.  As well, dinner is cooking.  I already got it up to a boil, then turned it down to a simmer.  An hour more should do it.  While I did get the wash into the dryer, I haven't scared up a mess enough of clothes for a second wash.  I'll get to that before the night is through, I do believe.

Really, what I have left, is another load of laundry, pushed through to completion, drying the last of the dishes in soak, dinner and putting that up after I am done... oh, I need to remember to scrub and add a patch of red potatoes... the sauerkraut can be heated at the end, then, later, to scrub the bathroom... sweep, mop, pickup, rinse the floor, and perhaps hit the pot while I am at it.  Then, if I still have mojo, put in the last of the dishes which are free ranging my a.o.

Not bad.  I really wasn't sure if I was blowing smoke about my efforts.  Especially off medicine.  All good.  Now to game a bit, as things percolate their way to completion in their time and I recoup some of the energy cast off on my side of things.  Good good.  Later.

A start.

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A first load of laundry is going.  Simple cottons.  I don't have much in any category.  Still, I might be able to put a couple more loads together, and through, tonight.  If nothing, I will take laundry back and separate it for when I do have enough.  I reset dishes to a fresh soak, or rinse as the case demanded.  I set the alarm, after that.  When it goes off I will hit the dishes again.  Those in a soapy soak will be washed, the others will be dried and put up.  Then a shower.  After that, the dishes go back in for a fresh rinse, laundry will be rotated with a new load going in if there is enough, then back to gaming.  Hmm... might set dinner to cooking before I rest.

After that, a bit down.  Then dinner, and a bit more down.  Finally, perhaps, tending the dishes that were soaking.  As a last effort, cleaning the bathroom.  Though once that is clean, then I will set up the last of the 'wild' dishes, the ones remaining around the house.  Mostly all in the kitchen.  Still, it's wise to look here or there.  A fork might have been set aside, or even a glass from time to time.  You never know when dealing with an ogre.

If I get these things done, tomorrow I really hit the kitchen.  With the intent of completely cleaning and clearing it.  It's mostly empty boxes and packing material, with general clutter.  It, if I can get to it, and can stay with it, will take a couple of days to clear and clean down to something resembling a shine.  Then a day or two off, and then on to the computer room.  Yeah, I am going to really push to clean.  A couple of days in each room, a day off... two if needed, then back to another room.  If I finish, then a week break, while trying to maintain my gains, then back for finer detail work.  That's the idea anyway.

I am hoping to have my place cleaned well enough that I can have company visit without too much embarrassment.  A meal, here, where I have my favored pans and systems.  Well, and to cook, even for myself.  I really want to get back into cooking, do some baking, and not have to trip over too 'busy' of a kitchen.  We'll see.  Later.

Yes, I know the day.

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Not much I could do about it.  Sleep is very off, and strictly limited.  I AM pushing, for what it is worth.  I wake at about 20:00, then can't really do anything until about 22:00 or a bit later.  I am staying awake until 11:00 to noon, but those last four hours are pretty useless.  They merely mark a full day.  As I push those, in order to weave night into day, I suffer.  This time it is taking a great deal of effort to push days and night around.  It is taking longer.  I chalk that up to not being on any medicine.  Though, even on medicine, that can happen.  I have arranged to get out Wednesday.  So I am hoping to have things set up, or close enough, by then.  But it may be a week after that before I am back on days.  I just know, having a goal can help.  Especially with a ribeye tied to success.

I have been doing bits and pieces of this and that, workwise.  I hope to try to increase that.  A true push.  Tonight I hope to hit laundry, again, and in a major way; dishes, doing what is soaking, setting those aside, getting a shower, then doing what of those are still wanting and any other dishes I can find, cave wide; and, if that goes well, perhaps hit the bathroom hard tonight.  The tube/shower area is fine, it is the floor that needs hit, and the sink to a much more minor way.  The toilet itself, of course, could always use a bit of work.  I have found that doing just a bit, but often, with the toilet, is far better than hitting it really hard bur rarely.  Twice a week, three times maybe, just lightly... a bit of cleaner, a short soak and brush clean, then a final brushing out.  Very little elbow grease is needed this way.

Oh, and I might fix a corned beef roast through the night.  I have a small bag of red potatoes and plenty of sauerkraut.  I'll see if the sauerkraut is any good.  It's been in the frig the whole time, bottled up.  Not sure how long it really lasts.  Must be a year or two old though.  Always nervous about old food, even if it is supposed to 'last forever'.

Will I get to it all?  Who knows.  I have some doubt and some hope.  Both are good, for their own reasons, in the mortal plains.  If you know how to use them, they can help.  If you aren't watching them as if they were wild children, they may well trip you up.  It's not always a choice though.  Young ones are quick and we are only... well... human.  Or, that is how you would understand it!  Later.

With eating fish comes responsibility.

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What's that, again?  Oh, well, if you are going to eat fish, shrimp, or shellfish, or the like then you have to do some things.  First, buy as fresh as you can.  Better out some coin than out some coin and with bad fish.  A bit more for a bit less means care in use and a bit of humility in consumption.  If you aren't coastal, that is as good as it gets.  Still, I would like to do trout.  Even that is a bit of an expense to obtain, mind you.  I doubt if it is any cheaper, costs over price.  Though I think that taking a trip up, camping over several days, maybe a week, if care is given in foods and living arrangements, perhaps trout could be had at a better price, though time is money too... just less expensive for one such as myself than for most.

Okay, after freshness?  Ah, cleanliness.  I found this out quickly, last time.  If you cook fish or the like, you must clean up immediately.  Any waste needs to be tended, first in the kitchen, then out of the house.  Quickly.  Hie!  That stuff goes bad so fast your head will spin.  Cooking the food will put a bit of a stank in the dwelling, but that will pass.  Remnants will put a stink on the place that lives like a curse, one which can only be lifted first by removing the source, then allowing enough air in, then back out, to carry it off.  Clean, immediately.  Trash out, pots, pans, utensils, in a soak at least.  Any fluids best to flush, as if put in the trash I swear it always finds a way out of the "waterproof" trash bags.  Always.  Even this time.  Which means I double bagged (initially out of an abundance of caution, which happened to be right), and after I have hit the dishes once I will rinse out the trash container.  Bleh.

Love fish and etc.  Do not like the immediacy of cleanliness.  Still, gotta do that if I want to eat good food.  Once a week.  I can handle the expense and work.  Though, usually, with just fish, the hassle is much less.  Shrimp, lobster, even probably oysters, and the work load doubles and more.  Still, worth it.  Sacrifice for sacrifice?  Yeah.  The shrimp was fantastic though.  And I made clarified butter, enough for a bit, or ghee as some call it.  Mostly the same thing, good for lots of things, lasts well if prepped then put in the refrigerator.

Now for a settling gallon of tea, with lemon.  Later.

I did get out.

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Yesterday, anyway.  Shopping here and there, butter, ice, milk, the regulars.  Plus the bread I had my friend pick up, and treats.  It wasn't fancy.  Then a meal and some time visiting.  My friend has as much trouble with paperwork as I always have.  Thankfully, mostly, my time with paperwork is over.  There comes a time, from time to time.  I wish I could help him, but I can't honestly help myself on that issue.

Before heading back home, I suggested we arrange for something in the future.  I may have to push, but that is sometimes what it takes.  A trip somewhere west of a nearby city, just over the pass.  Then a meal at my favorite steak house after.  He isn't in to steak.  They should have something he might like.  I need a well made steak.  I haven't had a treat like it in a while.  The steaks I have bought have been sub par for some time now.  I really should try at the real butcher shops, but those are so out of the way, and might be a bit too expensive as well.

I continue to work with the pan I seasoned.  It'll take time, but it is much improved compared to when it was ripe from the manufacturer.  Tonight I cut two different types of potatoes into two different shapes each.  Mostly playing, but with an eye on learning.  The jury is still out.  And my process wasn't the best.  It was entertaining and informative, up to a point.  Science, even the science of cooking, isn't a one shot deal.  Time, effort, product, other expendables, plenty of success and mistakes, all go into turning out the best.  Though there is more to it.  Science, more surely than any wish to admit, is an art.  And most people, no matter how well trained, are not artists.  I don't even claim such, if I do claim to have an eye for art, some forms of it... mostly human art, or the art of humanity?  In any case, beyond the fun and games and perhaps art, was the added seasoning of the pan.

Oh, as well, I used peanut oil tonight.  I do believe I will filter that and put it into a jar.  Next time I will be using tallow.  Tallow is a solid at room temp.  Now, for me, I am hoping to work up an oil blend I enjoy for potatoes.  Fries, chips, any form really.  A mix of peanut, tallow, and maybe a touch of lard, to add a meaty taste.  So, for now, I am thinking, as I use various oils, I will blend them as I go.  Oils actually last a while for cooking, if you don't burn them beyond their ability to be used again.  Most people don't know that, and waste.  Through, true enough, fussing with oil between cooking is a delicate and messy matter.  There is that.

Hmm, off to... something or other.  Good day... night... whatever it is you are facing.

She comes.

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The Rishi, remember, sent a snake.  It was unsuccessful.  further, it was wrapped around the neck, as an adornment.  The serpent was not the same as in Christian lore, but of another.  Mind you, there are parallels.  Even though unsuccessful, sometimes the venom, while not fatal, has to be endured.  And in it times to come and gone are seen, and the ways of things are become known.

Working through things.

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A bit of laundry tonight.  Just the towels.  I had them all, all that had been used.  However there is something odd.  My towels, from time to time, seem to go rancid.  Is that even possible?  It smells as if oil, or something, got in them.  If I left the drawer open, and one of the girls, on a bad day, got in there and nested... or some such.  But that doesn't happen.  Could it be that the washing machine isn't removing soap properly, and that is what is going bad?  All I know is, I took extra precautions with this load, checked them after washing and drying, and then cleaned the drawer out before putting them away.  No, I really do try.  I just can't keep up on everything that can go wrong.  I keep checking with those who can smell, to make sure I don't smell off.  Seems to be okay.  And my nose is sensitive to things, like the off putting scent of the towels.  And usually I know there is something a bit off, or could be, here in the cave.  I thawed fish recently, but forgot to get that cooked or in the refrigerator in a timely fashion.  I knew that was... leaving a mark, on the nose.  Even when it was taken out, that lingers.

Never mind.  I did attempt egg fried rice.  I am either not doing something right or I don't like egg fried rice.  Perhaps brown rice just won't work for that dish, or I would have to accept it as less.  I have had egg fried rice, of various sorts, that I thought I liked.  And other dishes that taste like what I did produce.  Perhaps it's a mood thing, or as I suggested, the wrong technique(s) or basic building blocks.  The pan is great.  It is a wok, really, in the shape of a skillet.  There are some limits and some advantages to the skillet form.  Oh, and I looked up a bit on the wok/skillet of this sort.  I think it will do me well.  And, maybe, someday, or for outside cooking in the warmer months from time to time, with the open flame propane system, I might get a wok and figure that out.  I just don't want it for the flattop, or even without flame, really.  Oh, here is a video regarding these sorts of things, and cooking with them.  They aren't exactly alike, but close enough.

Oh, I should have called my friend last night, to remind him to shop for bread.  Well, and to also ask him to pick up some pastries.  It's not like I eat those daily, weekly, even monthly really.  A couple of sweet rolls every other month is... reasonable.  Ah well, I may find some other treat.  Or I could try to stay awake long enough to call him yet this morning.  We'll see.

Bits and pieces of other things have been happening.  I can't quite work at any speed or with any focus.  Medicines make a huge difference, or do when they do.  Off them and I am a flounder, out of the water.  I'll keep making jabs at this and that.  Shopping this evening, then perhaps more laundry.  I might finish off what of the dishes I have in the rinse now.  Bleh.

Good night.

Seasoning is not just for food.

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The pan actually worked quite well.  I didn't do egg fried rice, just a couple of fried eggs.  I was curious, dinner had just arrived and been eaten, so I went with a smaller portion.  I will, probably, do egg fried rice in an hour or two.  No problem with sticking.  I hope, however, that over time the seasoning improves.  For a first real shot at it, a beginning, the pan does well.  Searing meats and other cooking, even eggs, will go forward.  Sure, the non-stick pan is good for that.  I just don't... like... trust... non-stick, the modern stuff.  I have been looking for a way around that.  To be honest, cast iron, unless used daily, washed carefully (and it is messier), and such, simply won't work.  Even then I have some doubts.  Traditional, sure.  But I think it was simply the best they had, not the best we have now.  For non-stick without the chemicals, today, high carbon is probably the best.  I do suspect that it, too, will be messy to work with, and finicky, but better than cast.

I may go ahead and season the remaining pan tonight.  As well, maybe do some laundry.  Towels for sure.  Though more is needed.  I have a few dishes I might knock out, or not.  And of course egg fried rice.  I'm not sure I have any meat to add with that.  No real problem though.  Hmm, best check to see if I need to make more rice though.  I don't have oyster or fish sauce, though perhaps a dab of soy and worcestershire sauce will work.  No veggies on hand, either... Or, maybe?  I'll check the larder.  Peas in there wouldn't be bad.

Later.

The pan and life.

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I actually crashed while the pan was cooling.  I ran it as hot as my oven would go for two hours.  Then I was supposed to let it cool in the oven.  After I turned off the oven I had to go to bed.  I really wanted to look, but I didn't want to risk a chance.  When I woke, my head wasn't quite on straight.  I knew there was something or other.  I think the girls woke me.  When a delivery man arrives, they can get into a panic, begin chasing around and knocking into things.  Today they knocked over an empty kitchen sized trash can.  Nothing in it, as mentioned, still it made a bit of noise.  I think that is what woke me.  After I saw what had happened I checked the door.  The pants from Duluth Trader are in.  I haven't tried them for size yet.  I sure hope these fit, as there isn't a tweener size, and these would be too small if anything, the others were really too big.  Perhaps they were made on a pattern for jeans, but the material doesn't shrink when washed?  Dunno.  Love the pants, if they fit.

Ah, right.  Like I mentioned, my head was not on my shoulders right, first thing.  Between being half awakened by cat malfeasance, then with that drawing me to something else, and that all leading my mind in a whole other direction on a number of topics, I forgot about the pan.  But not for long.  Oh, the bladder was reminding me of something.  Go, go, go.  It would not shut up until I took it for a walk.  A pleasure, of course, but a nag is a nag.  Finally, head and bladder cleared, thought processes back to nil, a moment of quiet, and... I about jumped to go check on the pan.

It looks good.  The bottom inside of the pan might be a little tacky.  Though I wondered.  Even though I heated the pan and the tallow on it on the stovetop first, then wiped it as clear and clean as I could, I suspected there would be some puddling in the basin.  Hmm... when I do the other pan, I will probably put foil on the rack below and turn the pan upside down.  That'll fix that.  Still, all in all, it has a good look to it.  Before long I will be testing it on some egg concoction.  Actually, probably far on into the night, for lunch or dinner.  If all is well, I may begin with the other pan.  Yep, this is how it is done.  I hope.  Actually, I am thinking egg fried rice.  I'll need to make more rice if I am out, but that is no problem.

Today?  I don't know.  Mostly just killing time as I shift my days and nights.  I have plans for tomorrow, but that didn't make sense for today, since bread isn't available.  I do look over things financial, from time to time.  I recently used my credit card.  Then started paying it down.  However, I wanted it paid off quicker, so triple timed it.  Which means I have two months on that and then I will probably add to my house payment even more.  Oh, and I seem to have home depot on my pay list but have no debt to them.  I need to figure out which bank has them on auto and turn that off.  I should probably check bills, I think or or two always goes off the rails from time to time.  Best check things again... next time each bill comes in.  Putting the collection somewhere I will remember.  Bleh.

Not bad for a mostly dead guy, really.  Especially one off all medicines.  Though it is much easier to muddle through knowing that there is a path to a bit more function, or at least form.  I might not be able to reach it now, or ever, but I do know what the problem is and how to solve some of it.  Thus I can endure without... losing my grip completely.  Healer, heal thyself.  Later.

Blackening a pan.

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Yeah, it's how you do it.  High carbon steel pans can be made non-stick.  You season them.  There are a number of ways.  One of them is done on the stovetop.  I've been working on it for two of my 'days'.  I may have a problem.  The examples I viewed used a gas stove.  Which is great, except I have a flattop stove.  I can't seem to get the heat to go up the sides.  It looks like I may need to use the oven method.  I don't think what I have done, so far, is a problem.  It might end up shortening the oven process.  Or not.  It takes a goodly amount of time and effort to do it on the stove.  The oven is, from what I have gathered, quicker.  Being spring, and still cool, the oven won't be a problem.  If it works well, or even not, I should get the process down.  I have two pans to do, only one in the works at the moment.

I have been watching cooking videos.  There are a number of things I would really like to hit.  Among them, the five mother sauces, then secondary sauces to those.  I'm telling you, if you can make a good sauce and know how to soften shoe leather enough to chew you can get away with much.  Besides sauces, I would like to begin attempting stocks.  Those are required for secondary sauces anyway.  For these things, I need a number of items.  Among them, some well seasoned pans.  Cast iron pans are good, I just thought these pans would be interesting to try.  I was hoping they would be lighter and easier to season and keep seasoned.  Scratch both of those notions, but no problem.  Since I have them already, I might as well fit them into my systems.

Beside those foods, I really want to begin messing with crepes and pancakes.  What the neighbor lady served blew me away.  I don't think I can do that well, but I wouldn't mind trying.  These skillets might work with these, though the non-stick is probably better for crepes.  Crepes don't have be a treat, either.  I've seen mushroom filled, and others.  I could see them, made with a spice blend, turned into a really nice European tortilla, really.

Which all reminds me.  I still haven't ordered the hand crank grain mill.  I've done a lot.  I've stored more, here and there.  I've advanced in many ways.  I simply keep forgetting that.  I have great doubts if that will be used often, if at all.  It is merely an emergency item.  Though I would like to set it up and give it a whirl, at least a few times.  Who knows, it might just stay in place somewhere.  After the beef, after restoring savings a bit too.  It's back on the short list.  I may be ordering hard white wheat this next month.  A bucket to replace the one I will be opening.  Yeah, I have those special lids, to keep the grains as fresh as possible after opening.  It's a funny world.  Need this to do that, so this and that can go forward, but only if that and those are on hand.  It gets... tricky.

Later.

Uhrm. Hmm?

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Oh right, of course.  Time is slipping.  No major fuss.  As I attempt to get my days and nights to swing around to their right places while weather fiddles and temps increase, I realize that spring is always a bit of a challenge.  No need to hold my breath, push, or pull.  Best to let things happen at their pace, making small adjustments where and when possible.  Best not to become too fussy.  That never works.  Frustration is just that.  Oh, and I am not on medication, so there is that too.  I may call about the doctor appointment tomorrow... if I can be awake late enough.  I know I won't wake early enough in the afternoon.

I meant to call my friend.  I missed events Sunday, and didn't call.  I was ambushed into the twilight and not in line with keeping up on things Sunday.  Often the case, yet doubly so that day.  A call, I thought, sometime soon.  I was hoping he might make it to Crumb Brothers for a couple loaves of bread.  Yeah, worth it.  I don't eat bread often, but when I do...  As it turns out, he called me.  Good thing, I probably would have forgotten again.

I let him know that I have become a vampire again, or back on the night schedule at least.  I told him I was hoping to go in to town tomorrow.  Not until late, as my schedule is unscheduled... for day business.  I let him know what I wanted, and asked if he could pick up some bread.  He has been meaning to get there himself.  Though he didn't think it was open Monday and Tuesday.  After a bit of checking, nope.  So I rescheduled for a Wednesday night run to town, sometime later.  Oh, beside bread, it would be good to have a few pastries.  I'll call tomorrow, see if that would be doable.  Just a couple.  Weekly treat.

I was speaking with the neighbor tonight.  He asked what I thought of the pancakes from the other day.  I let him know to let the Mrs. know that those where the best pancakes I have ever eaten.  Seriously?  Seriously.  I was right.  At least a portion of the flour was home milled.  And, I agree with adding half white to the mix, or it is just too heavy.  Finally, now I know I like some things I used to believe were inedible.  Honey... just have to buy the real, raw, local stuff.  Maple syrup, if you can't buy local buy good.  It'll cost, just use less.  And pancakes, just have to use the right flour and mix of it really.  Still, making those is a bit of an art.  I really need to get going on grinding my own flower.  I have the machine, and flour.  I just want a replacement bucket of wheat so as to cycle through.  Easy enough, might even order a bucket tonight, come to think of it.  Or at the first, depending on finances.

Later.

Just to contrast with recent music.

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Contrast?  Enhance?  I can't quite get the word.  Hmm... paraphrase isn't it, as it's a quote used twice.  At the end of this song, the beginning of the other.  Never mind.  Too tired, too long awake, to early, to late, and all that jazz.  Still, here it is.  I knew there was something... connecting this to that song.

Wyoming.

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True enough.  Headed out today without a clue.  Honey, maybe shopping, a hike, and a meal... probably.  Late, of course, was the hour.  I was going as fast as I could which wasn't.  I should have taken a jacket.  Still chilly, especially when the sun sets.

The honey plant was the first stop.  I picked up two kinds... the multi-state clover honey and the mountain honey.  A premium on the later.  Easy to know why.  I plan on getting a couple of quarts more of the mountain honey, just to keep in the pantry, and use slowly through time.  I can't eat a lot of honey.  But I do need some sweets.  As I was saying when buying, until I found real honey, I thought I didn't even like honey at all.  A lot of the store bought stuff is... well... it almost might as well have been manufactured.  Same with maple syrup.  Life is a bit better with more local items, if too that isn't always possible or even always best.  It's a sound principal, if not truly survivable, not for me.  Do my best.

After that, a trip into the mountains.  A hike along the way.  A bit more travel, further on, and then to the border with Wyoming.  It's been years since I was through there.  Born but not raised there.  My friend, too, was born there.  Like me, he was a traveler.  And yet he has family there, as I do in Iowa and Colorado.  Quite a thing.

On the way we notice deer.  Lots of deer.  Lots and lots and lots of deer.  All along the last forty miles of highway.  Two larger herds, plus smatterings of singles and small groups.  Shortly before seeing the second larger herd, we spotted a hefty band of antelope.  I haven't seen wild antelope since I was a kid.  On the way back we then spotted a badger.  Quite an interesting drive.  Thankfully we weren't, mostly, on blind curves in odd places.  The two I remember seeing there, the deer did not seem interested in testing their mettle.  A hawk and raven were seen as well.  All in all it was a very good day to get out, and what was done while out was well worth the effort.  My friend had to push, a bit, to get me going.  And he himself wasn't sure he was ready.  As I said, once the foot is out the door, the opportunity begins making itself.

Hope to get out again, and this Sunday.  I'll try to be more timely, but my schedule is just... it's one way and in the wrong way.  I'll do my best.  Dang it, I think I can.  When life is going this well it's worth pushing a bit more.  This time birding, to my west I believe, and perhaps to the south a bit too, but in the valley.  If time and light hold, travel might take us further afield if necessary.  I need to find my bino's and get my camera ready.  Adventure awaits the... unwary?  That notion puts a grin on my face.

Oh, a tuna steak and rice for dinner.  I forgot to shop, so no lemon.  Not always needed, just a nice extra touch.  And for tea.  Ah well.

Later, perhaps good night.

It's on.

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My friend called.  Twice... twice before I woke.  Then again which did wake me.  But... I wasn't awake.  :p  I called him back about an hour later.  I think?  I thought he was going to call back, but might have... gotten lost in his world or we had a misunderstanding.  No real worries, just as it goes.  Two hours, I suggested, then napped for an half hour more, meaning to sleep a full hour more.  Woke and am coming to life a bit early.

A blog post, some music, a shower, then in to town.  A stop at the honey plant, maybe, then a short hike somewhere, perhaps.  Just getting out.  Late, but it'll do.  A meal somewhere, too.  A small one.  I have fish for tonight.  I need to get lemons from the store.  Now, what I don't use on fish I can add to tea from time to time.  I've become downright British, and then some, as to tea.  It's easier than coffee, can more easily be consumed hot or cold, and can be brewed several times (one load of leaves).  Second and third brewings are actually better, milder, not so acidic.  At some point it becomes more like slightly colored, brown or yellow/green, water.  But that isn't bad.  Plus, having been filtered, then essentially distilled, it's good water.  Now you know I see why people went to tea and coffee... that, too, will truly clean water (of much/some).

Want to go?  Well, yes!  And, no.  But this is why it is good to have friends.  I need to get out.  Might well not on my own.  And I do like getting out.  It's good.  At least once the foot is out the door.

Ah, on to just a touch of music, to rouse the bod.  Later.

Right.

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Ducks.  I was a bit nervous that the ones I prefer might be gone quickly.  They are seasonal.  It is past season and clocking fast.  Plenty on hand can go quickly.  Still, had to check my finances.  I thought my bank had sent an email suggesting my account was low, my main account.  Not good.  I thought they did that when it was sub $100, or even $50.  Nope.  Not a problem at all, from what I could see.  A little low, but... that was sort of expected with recent events.  After looking over both accounts, I believed I could order the birds.  I won't be ordering fish for several months, the ducks are eaten quarterly so won't be a soon expense, I am caught up on the house or that is on-tap, and I have enough, this month, to almost buy the cow and processing.  Still, I should hold off, for sure, next month.  I like having a good safety egg in there.  I'd like to, eventually, get to a small nest egg in the $10's of k's, but...

Anyway... ducks are, or will be, on the way.  Beef is coming in.  Then a hog, after the beef.  I'll probably need to order more fish the month after the beef arrives.  Just for Fridays, mostly.  It's nice to try, whatever, in it's freshest state of course.  I may not be homesteading, but I am learning to manage a larder.  I am hoping to get some of the beef cut so as to make jerky.  Bits and pieces of this and that.  I may never really get into canning, but I can and am doing some things.  It really isn't bad.

Oh, the other day I was lamenting not being able to get out and being out of butter.  I took half a pound to my friends, for the shrimp cook.  Wasn't needed, but forgot it.  Anyway, back to lamenting the fact of having no butter...  I remembered, then, that I had purchased canned butter.  I wasn't sure how good that would be.  It probably had to be better than nothing.  So I dug in, found and opened a can, and used it in several ways.  I used it with fish, I used it with popcorn, and I used it to make a butter pan sauce with a steak.  It smells really good.  To be honest, the taste was simply mild.  It wasn't too salty, or weird tasting at all.  I was... really trying to find a way to hate or dislike it.  Why?  To get over it if it was a failure of a purchase.  At this point, I happily recommend it.  It's Red Feather brand, from Australia.  I wouldn't recommend it for daily daily, simply too expensive.  And fresh butter cannot be beat if available.  However, having a can or dozen on hand, for any problem, would not be bad.  As I suggested, I prep as much for times where health doesn't allow a visit to the store as for emergencies of larger scales.

Oh, right.  The neighbors brought pancakes yesterday.  Not a usual dinner night, but it was sure welcome.  And those were some of the best pancakes I have ever eaten.  The canned butter did quite well on that, too.  Lucky, if I just remember to make myself so?  Half and half, and not what some put on their peaches.  :p

Later.

Play nice?

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Actually, yes, usually.  Not advice, though it is on offer.  When something is a problem, start out nice.  Only if it gets sticky should you begin with applying force.  Further, targeted, limited, force is best.  Just enough to get the bolt to loosen, then back to simple efforts.  Force is too rich, expensive I mean, to spend anywhere and everywhere.  I have learned this myself, for myself, especially as health fell.

A call to check on the return of the pants I had ordered, then returned.  The colors I wanted were gone, they had been the only ones of those on sale.  I knew there might be an issue with a higher price.  I did not demand an equal price, or cause any fuss.  I let her run her program and do her things.  I could barely hear her, though I let that pass.  In time she even let me know why.  Travel, getting back from vacation, and first day back after R&R.  After all was set, I asked if the price would be the same.  Nope, but she looked a bit.  Then asked about the price.  I didn't have the info, but she found it and... reset it all to my initial price, though with a bit for the shipping label.  Done deal.

Next I called about the ducks I ordered.  For whatever reason, they didn't get the order.  Odd, but okay.  I don't want to buy this month, but next.  Their stock seems good.  I am hoping they hold until I can order.  All good, now I know.  Those things have been bugging me, like fleas, for some time.  Now I know.  The world can move so fast this time, and so slowly that.

I am going to make another attempt to call about getting a local doc.  Third time the charm?  Wouldn't bet on it.  That system, along with the whole of the V.A., is meant to time people out to death.  A third, from what I am hearing, of applicants die before their cases are even reviewed.  It isn't from lack of money, they always get even more than they ask to receive.  Then again, perhaps that is why.  Fill the union coffers and they make sure to keep costs down, one way or the other.  Business.

Later.

Some success.

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Sleep is rolling day into night, again.  It grew overcast, then snowed, the last few days.  The snow is gone.  It is still dark, again.  Cold too.  That ruffles feathers regarding sleep regularity.

I did not make the call I was hoping to make.  I was not awake enough to attempt it.  Later on I called my mother.  She sounded rather chipper.  We did have a good talk.  Last week she was ill.  I told her to call me in that situation.  If nothing else, I can pray.  Yeah, it helps.  I then called my friend.  Just to check on him, mostly.  As well, I am hoping to get out Friday.  Weather is supposed to break by then.  He knows where to get good local honey.  I would like to get a quart or two and a pint.  They offer several types of honey, valley stuff, a mix of various states' clover honey, and mountain honey.  The valley stuff isn't quite as tasty, or so I hear.  If you have allergies, however, the valley honey offers a type of antidote to that through the processing of local pollen and such.  Or so the tale goes.  My friend is pretty sure it is helping him.  My deal is that I don't suffer from allergies, not even ones which used to be severe.  A wasp sting a year or two ago didn't even give me a minor fit.  He knows where to get it.  Plus, throw in a hike perhaps.  If weather continues to improve, perhaps another hike Sunday.  Yes, I am trying to figure things out.  I can't seem to hit appointments, or exact time windows, but I can, if time is flexible, make it somewhere, eventually.

I have been working on keeping a bit of food in my belly.  I am showering.  I have done minor house cleaning, if not quite enough to keep up really.  Still, slowing the slide has it's benefits.  If I can figure out how to get going I might... never mind.  I'll keep at it.  Just not a housekeeper.  I might hit the bathroom, soon.  The floor, really.  I keep the lou in pretty good shape, and the shower/tub.  And my new trick will help me keep up the rest easier as well.  Yeah, it's worth problem solving.  The thing is, sometimes, even when it is right in front of me, I don't always see there is a problem to solve.  Everyone has that problem though.

Dinner and a nap?  Maybe popcorn, a movie, then a nap?  Something like that.  I am crashing, at an odd time.  Though if I can use that to swing my days around, all the better.  Later.  Or, maybe, good night.  Hmm... perhaps with something to ponder, something(s) coming up, I can focus?  That will guide me to...  Nah.  I think the sudden onset of sleepiness is some sort of major or minor weather change seeping in.  Yeah, later or good night.

No, not yet.

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No, she said.  A whisper to a sense other than the ears.  Heard, well, though.  I knew what she meant.  I could not comfort her.  I will here.  I think it will find it's way to her.  No, I agree, not yet.  Not by far.  Only a place I visit on the border between here and there, from time to time.  Much as when family visit their kin, where they are buried.  Only, it is myself, of other times, with whom I tarry.  No worries.  I am... well built.

Dark. Hope too.

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Buried in life, flesh, time.  No pain, at the moment.  Forms of chaos, lost in a confusion of moments.  I've had worse, and it might yet be mended.  There is a way.

I don't I can't be sure.

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Off medication.  I remember what I couldn't remember on medication.  The life I lived for so long is back.