A new week and much to do.

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The chicken was finished and refrigerated last night, along with enough fluid to use in the cooking. I am not sure if the chicken was cool enough to take off the bone last night, but by the time it was even cool enough to put away, it was too late to stay up later doing the task in any case. I am looking forward to getting that done later this day. I have one pan soaking, one that I will need, but everything else should be set.

The weather here has become powerful. The heat indexed with humidity is supposed to total to a feel of 100 F. Drinking lots of water, eating little, and such are recommended, along with great care in even going outdoors. Sunburns, I have heard, can begin in as little as 15 minutes with no protection. I have noted, on hot days like these, even inside an air conditioned cave I feel that heat. Eating a normal meal is problematic as well. In this kind of heat, even in the shade and AC, my meal simply lumps into my stomach. It was interesting to note the news now includes the a UV rating (or something like that). It puts it at 10.0, nearly maximum. Something else new to me was that they suggested that near a beach, or where the sunshine might reflect off water or such, may double that count (so, I assume, double the risk for sunburn?).

I have to drive my neighbor to her appointment, as usual, today. She has said she would like to help, as well as my other neighbors. Instead of having her help me pack, though, I think I will see if she will help me simply straighten up today. And then, when the other neighbors come over this afternoon, I will be in better shape to begin packing. Between the help I am receiving, I should be able to do even more. Not only does it show respect to those helping, it helps me plan better regarding what we and I are doing, it gets the job done quicker. I know, common sense, duh, and other things. I did not say I am brilliant or that I would reinvent the wheel or invent the spouaaaj*.

I heard some disturbing news today. The porn industry is bringing in more money than all sports. I had heard that 90% or more of the internet is just porn before, though I doubted that. Now, I am not so sure. I am beginning to believe porn is much larger than I had ever imagined. I really, finally and ultimately, see it as altogether evil. It does completely objective women, specifically and generally. It makes women interchangeable and impersonal sexual objects. But more, it kills love in the hearts and minds of men. It cuts off the potential for a truly special relationship between men and women. Then again, I think many men and women prefer it that way. Turn what could be a deep, personal, whole life, even eternal sort of special love into a business deal complete, it keeps the risk for pain to a minimum, and incurs no fault since everyone knows the deal going into it. I am not sure if this is a result of the fractures in the family allowed by law, upheld by common life, the mobility now available, and the suppression of the Church, I just know it is a sad thing to watch.

I went through my dalliance with that particular evil. Before I joined the Church, before I rejected or even understood sin as I now feel called to do, I had fallen into ogling the screen. I was in a relationship at the time, dry as it was. Then again, considering it was a Godless relationship, I guess that is as good as those can be and probably on every level. I worried that my woman, at the time, would cheat on me. She seemed to be highly sexual and yet was not having sex with me. So, I prayed to God that he keep her chaste or allow her to be monogamous. And, as clearly as I have ever received a communication from God, and to my utter surprise (and, initially, frustration) I a heard in my mind, "Do not worry about the splinter in her eye, look to the log in yours!". It was not a question, it was a command. After a few (many) more prayers, I quit looking for a bit. I started up for just a short bit but felt so wrong and bad that I again prayed about it, then quit to this date.

I know the world of man seems to think porn is just another product. And, to some not too small degree, think women are merely products. From escorts to prostitutes, to arm candy girlfriends and wives, the distortion of the place of women has been warped. To some degree, it is no wonder women are drawn to careers. Between male expectations, the worlds demands, and their own warped image about themselves, perhaps there is little to be gained by being a humble yet true housewife. Or, that perception could falsely be ingrained.

Sex and beauty is sold everywhere. But what that beauty was intended to initiate, and what sex is really about, has been turned on it's head. For some women, beauty is just for themselves. But why? It will, and has to, fade. Flowers do bloom, fade, and then die, but they are productive in their time. Imagine if all of the tulips in the world, bloomed one more time but unproductively. They might be able to maintain their beauty a little longer, but in the end there would be no more tulips. And, I am guessing, this is the way of it. And, I am told, this is a good thing. Why? Because men are pigs, or so it goes. But, when confronted by a good man, by these same women, he is considered... what was the word... ah, yes... quaint.

I do not know if porn is all that most men think is left, or if it is what helped bring all this about. I know, from speaking to some men, I am considered a nerd for having rejected porn, more so for having rejected gratuitous affairs (even remaining monogamous within those was considered odd by many of my then fellows). The call to God, by God, confuses me. I was such a sinner, and recalcitrant about it for the most part. I am not sure how I heard that call over the cacophony of modernistic chaos and sin. I know what my just deserts were and even still are. And, yet, here I stand. And, seemingly alone and becoming more singular daily. I am not sure the world ever did change, perhaps I was just ignorant of the vast evil, while living in my own sin quite happily, until I followed the call. Maybe my eyes never were quite as open as I had thought they were. Now, what I would not do to close them, again, but this time to simply live without the evil in blissful ignorance.

Well, I should get back to work, rather than sit here writing to the air. Though these sessions unload many fears, thoughts, troubles, doubts, and such. With these off my mind, I am freer to go about physical work. Shining a light on those ghosts that haunt the shadows of my mind allows me to not be so upset and to know what it is that bothers me, taking away some of the sting they might inflict if I did not know from whence the poison comes. Perhaps it even allows some small ability to produce antivenin for some of those poisons, and brace for the toxins which have no curative. Today, for a bit, I will be free from this cloud. To work!