Crawling out of the pit.

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I sure hate it when I fall. Getting back up, often, is a bear. It starts with realizing I have fallen. While it seems that you would know right away, when your mind falls with you, that just isn't the case. And, lately, I have some mild but disturbing ups and downs so I have never quite been sure when I am down and when I am trying to get up. The stages can be confused, because after falling down and realizing it, the next step is to develop a plan to get up. And much of this last couple of falls and attempts at rising I have had a plan in place. I had to realize my plan(s) were ineffective, not strong or smart enough, or simply not sufficient for some other reason(s), scrap them, then figure out a new plan.

My new plan was discussed recently. Medicines, food, God, in that order I thought. Maybe not if I can make it to Mass today. I finally reset my medicine container. I was not able to focus before now to get that done. I had to take some medicines out, cut them, and put them back in at a lower dose. Oh, and I have quit spironolactone due to the risk of gynecomastia. One of my half-brothers had it in his teens, so I may be at risk (to my mind). It can, in other words, cause man-boobs. Anyway, it is all set up and I took my first dose for some time this morning and am drinking my potassium as I speak. Oh, and speaking of potassium, spironolactone is contraindicted when using potassium. It can be a lethal mix. Some doctors I have. There is a newer drug for my needs, eplerenone, but it increases creatine production, and I am way over the line on that as is. Nope, I think I have to stick, pretty much, with my original treatment plan.

Getting to Mass, then the store, would help greatly. I will be buying foods for small, quick, frequent meals. Right now I am not going to be too particular, though over time I am hoping to set up rice and beans on tap again, and begin having whole grain cereals much more frequently. I need to learn how to cook small portions of meats as well. Three to four ounce portions, along with rice, or beans, or other whole grains, and some vegetables and fruits in there as sides or snacks. I need the Eucharist more though. When I miss it, I starve in a way food cannot lend comfort.

I best get a shower, get dressed and groomed, and hit the road.