Nice.

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I was able to make it to bed at midnight, and other than some slight tossing and turning, stay there and fall asleep probably within an hour, perhaps an half hour.  I am sure I dreamed but it was mild to sweet normal type dreams.  Nothing carried to this morning, save some chuckles and grins.  Though there was a touch of something beautiful in there.  As dark as I can be, see, now that God has awaken me, I see the beauty of some things, in their fullness, fears, foibles.  I understand how that is no longer a weakness but the potential for something so much more.  Even if it retards me in the short term, and she will.  Ugh.  Shifting gears can do that.  And, shifting gears means setting the transmission for the demands at hand, so it will be different.

I set the alarm for... 8:00, I think.  I didn't want to push it with a 7:00 alarm, I believe.  I've been pushing things as is.  Of course, I didn't wake at 8:00.  It wasn't until 8:38.  I sort of wanted to wait until 8:42, just to be cute and for kicks and a chuckle.  But when I get the opportunity to rise I don't, can't, pass it up.  It may not be available when I want, or the next time.  You have no idea what I suffer through with choices, limits, and such.  Considering my health situation, my will in this given is inhuman.  I do what they don't believe I can do.  Even if I am frustrated with not doing more, I am already outstripping their expectations. 

I believe I will for another forty or fifty years.  Maybe more.  It's more an... acknowledgement, surrender, to His will.  One of His Sons had to die far too young, surrendering it.  Some have to live far too long, for our individual choices.  I have prayed for what Christ got, just as hard as he prayed for what I get.  As with Him, however, I too have surrendered to His will.  Fathers can be annoying, but a good son will do their bidding.  It just so happens that by doing His will we... are blessed in very wonderful ways.  A nice gift to share, I suspect.  Funny though, after surrendering my will, in time, I see why.  It's no longer a chore, if sometimes a minor or major pain.  *smile*  And... just a bit funny at that, at times.

Today?  Probably just recovery.  Probably a nap at noon.  Maybe a bit of work.  Vacuuming and hitting the bedroom, if I can.  With appointments out of the way for a while, and little else going on that would force my hand, I can begin building my daily life to some small degree.  I would like to finish the cave, since I am keeping up on food and dishes.  The bedroom needs to be heavily sorted out, vacuuming and steam cleaning would help a great deal, and when those are well in hand, assuming all else has been maintained, getting my garage shop up and running, then hitting the plumbing, would be the next bit.  And, of course, I need to start planning and arranging for both hiking and getting out a bit, which will naturally lead to being set up for the regional burn.  It's a crazy world.  I live in a difficult to work with body.  And yet I think I'll get it sorted out, sooner rather than later, and be back in some of the games before too long.

I am curious what my a1c is.  If it is still below 7 I will have to try to figure out why the machine has been showing 250-350 when testing.  I simply don't consume much of what would cause it to spike.  I am eating more frequently, and generally smaller portions, even adding danged veggies.  Something is going strange with that.  But with the other medicines tended and on track, I can now focus on this.  While I do add sugar to my diet occasionally, say twice a week, perhaps I actually need to add it more.  It seems counter-intuitive, but that is the nature of my anatomy.  I'm not a typical build, right down to the finials and eddies.  Everyone is unique.  Some are more unique.  I don't think I see it as something most would want, actually, though.

Yeah, well, I need to get to things.  Mostly just waking up enough to enjoy a nap in a bit.  *chuckles*