A bit pinched.

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Between sleep oddities, a promise to help a friend, and a scheduled event last evening, my last few days have been... difficult.  Without anything else, I saw the opportunity to retake days back into scheduled focus.  That alone was a bear.  The weather has cooled, and changed, adding effort to the existing rigor.  Then, I was told there would be an event.  A Christmas show, which I really wished to attend.  Yeah, I am an ogre.  And yet, it is a good thing, even to me.  Music, fellowship, with attention on Christ, God, the Holy Spirit.  Twenty years ago, I might have barked a laugh at such an invitation.  No, not for the reasons suspected.  I wasn't worthy.  I still question that, a bit.  But God did ring.  I have followed to where He led, as well as I am able.  I bowed, went to my knees really, in humility and for forgiveness.  Even when standing I try to remain on my knees.  Always in God's presence, if I don't always see it... or remember.

Anyway, I have been keeping a day schedule, mostly.  It's been very rough.  Not much else happening.  I haven't completely dogged out of life.  Food, dishes, minor upkeep, showering, medicine.  It is bottom of the barrel stuff, compared to recent weeks and months, but it is a decent baseline.  Even the girls have noticed, and appreciate, the new step up to the plate of life.  Messing with me is much more fun when, on the spur of a moment, I will pop up and hunt them back.  Cats love the give and take of hunting and being hunted, attention seeking and giving, if at random moments for best results.

Today I am hoping to keep going well enough to finally get to town early enough to look for a number of things.  I want to do a pricecheck for a heavy duty dolly, and perhaps see if local prices for Lightroom 5.  I found one that does stairs (supposedly) rather well.  The problem is it doesn't handle much weight.  I can't swear how much a washer, dryer, or refrigerator weigh, but I am guessing my dryer is into the #100-200 pound area, and in a tight spot, so difficult to manage even more so.  As I have been keeping up on the place, and doing more, I am hoping to clear and clean the back porch.  Under the machines, and all.  But I really need a strong dolly for that.  And, next year, I hope to buy a new refrigerator... one that is specifically easy to clean and has a good reputation for maintaining temperature control.  I hate meats refreezing in the refrigerator.  Refreezing makes meat bland.  Bought frozen or fresh, it was at least frozen once before.  If "fresh", then it is definitely already twice frozen.  A third refreezing, or fourth depending on how the butcher worked it, really things out the value of the meat.  Yeah, yeah, most don't know, or care.  It's just protein, right?  Nutritional, and flavor, values, take a hit each time, from what I understand.

Anyway, yes, I am hoping to make a trip to town.  Not, most likely, until around noon.  Maybe early afternoon.  It's as good as I can do.  I have managed to get sleep in order, for daytime, but it's been, and remains, quite a bit of an effort.  I don't know if I will be able to keep it going.  There isn't much daylight, mind you, but it's more a clock than light schedule.  If it doesn't hold, I will begin spinning through day and night again.  We'll see.  Oh... while in town I need to remember to pick up ingredients for quiche.  I will be making three or four, to practice.  Bacon in some, mushroom in other, with leek and spinach for vegetables,  cheese of various sorts, and cream, in all.  Perhaps fresh chopped parsley in a few of them, maybe onion and garlic as well, in some.  Hopefully I will get a picture of any that turn out to my liking, while exhibiting photogenic properties.

For now, a few cups of coffee, a couple of episodes of the show, then a shower and air dry time.  A bit pinched, certainly.  But pinched no longer means completely lame.  Later.