Quitter.

.

.

How long has it been since I used tobacco?  Had a beer?  I remember how long it has been since I've been with a woman.  That one... still hurts.  It's been more years since the last than the others, by far.  Even so, as mentioned, it is what is missed the most.  I get a hankering, from time to time, for the last.  Not usually for the others.

Though, sometimes, I remember a time when I did consume one of the others, usually heavier together.  When I remember the time, too, I remember the hunger.  If remembering a time when drinking, I may reach out, absently, for my mug... or a plug of tobacco, pipe, cigar, cigarette, or else.  As often, I would dose tobacco, then have a sip.  Still, very rare.  And without any cravings after, oddly.

I am surprised I don't dream of these things.  I have been using tobacco sine... 1978, maybe earlier.  Started with cigarettes, went to chewing tobacco.  It was easier to hide.  I quit, say, in 2015 or 2016?  Give or take.  Once I quit, and no one around me used, it was easy.  I never looked back.  Did use the patch, and as long as I felt it was needed.  It really did become unnecessary and fell out of use.  I think, when they push it, they do damage to the process.  It makes me wonder if they are trying to keep people on these things.

Alcohol?  I pretty much did that cold turkey.  I have had drinks since.  I tried vodka when stoved up by covid.  It worked, slightly, but then it too failed.  I did finish that bottle off, if gently.  Just sips, from time to time, well watered down.  Just didn't want to see it go to waste.  Doubted if a shot in a quart of coffee, from time to time, would hurt.  And it didn't.  Neither did I feel the need to hit it more, or after.  I was... curious.  Curiosity, I suspect, for some, may be quite dangerous.  I won't be testing it on a regular basis.  Only if some call to it arises, literally medicinally.  Would like to have a small smattering of long lasting bottles around.  Vodka can be used for else, and is mostly clean for keto... if it will stop ketosis for a few days.

Anyway.  Yea.  It's been a bit of a process.  Far easier than I thought it might be.  So many changes.  Still, wouldn't mind a woman around.  But only rightly.  Not sure women are all that patient.  Odd how the shoe changes feet as time passes, in many ways.  Oh well.  

As to Afghanistan?  I honestly wonder if 'the big guy' got a cut for embarrassing America, more for botching enough to probably leave American and allied hostages for the Taliban.  I could see him taking money and favors, or some other setaside, kickback, or other graft, bribe, or payoff, to do what he did.  This was absolutely intentional.  

As for the Americans left there?  They weren't generally good people.  Spies, thieves, cronies, and others trying to make it rich, somehow, on the war and worse in a foreign land.  The Christian converts, they are another matter.  I'll pray for those poor sobs.  And those few who were actual allies.  The Brits?  They... were there before, solo, a long time ago.  Should have known better just from that.  And to continue trusting America, when the election was stolen and power was given to a Chinese puppet?  Seriously?  Whatevs.  

Later, or good night.