Not so much.

.
.
Work simply did not occur.  I will not harbor concern.  I have a list, phases with switches, time will manage itself.  I used more keto stuff.  Not all of it as some of it has various limits per day.  When that failed, I consumed extra food, if within the fasting window.  Nothing works.  Ketone readings seem to indicate between 40 and 80, if closer to 40?  Perhaps the system simply isn't burning fat well enough yet?  Or other health is the problem?  I can't be certain.

The plan.

.
.
All has been under consideration this morning.  Short, medium, and long term objectives have been plotted in time space.  As well food.  A new additive is being tried, MCT oil.  Still daily fasting, better at it.  So ketosis slurry is being used, with the oil if variously, not together.  Oh, and I can't go completely without sucra drops.  I have cut it to one use per day and half my usual dose.  It is helping, if two to three shots of the keto stuff on busy days such as today it is hoped.  Busy x 3?

Okay, first things.  A group of projects to be accomplished before moving on.  The bathroom needs to be cleaned top to bottom.  The floor, toilet, tub... as well the little L-hallway needs cleared and cleaned.  Next, under and the kitchen sink itself has to be cleared and cleaned.  Finally some sort of bath needs to take place.  A sponge, or other sort.  Hair is still clean as of yesterday.  All of these things absolutely done, then a call.  In case I find a plumber with the time.

Then the call(s).  If I find one who can do the tub, but not else, I may keep calling.  Regardless if services are available today or not, the plan is to continue cleaning in the kitchen.  If I get the general surfaces and stove/oven done, then I'll begin the entry hall. All done today?  I am not sure I will make the call, might no get there.  Though by tomorrow for sure.

As to the rest?  I won't bother until this pair of batches is completed.  Wishing well, a little prayer for a fool who keeps trying, or such, are all welcomed.

Felt that.

.
.
Couldn't do much more after the last post.  One more different strategy against the tub blockage, several times.  Using baking soda and vinegar, then plunging or blocking it off.  Neither helped at all.  It really doesn't nake sense.  Air seems to be escaping while liquid doesn't were that shouldn't be the case.

I forgot about a better way to void the water... the shop wet and dry vac!  A plastic bag or two as a liner and that should do.  The bucket was good for most of it.  I really didn't want to sop the rest with a towel.  Hmm, though mopping wouldn't be bad either, so the floor could be cleaned while at it.  Though, for emptying the toilet to reseal, the wet vac would be perfect.

Today is for making calls.  Probably, if I can get a plumber in or scheduled, I'll need to buy a faucet.  If he can get to that and the sink that is.  I'll see what he recommends of course.  It would be good to have the tub, drip, faucet, and sink plumbing all done in one shot, if I'll be much lighter in the wallet.  Oh well.

The rest is sort of on standstill.  My schedule is still off.  I can't be sure how things will work.  I can be awake to let someone in to work, but that doesn't mean I can be dressed and out and at an appointment.  One is approaching I can't miss, but it is in alignment with the natural arc of life.  Next week, if days are established, perhaps... so much to schedule... confession since trying to make it at regular times has failed so catastrophically, a doctor appointment, a go with the masseuse, and... something else.  Ugh!  Oh, I may try to get in to the VA for dental and glasses.  If I think there is more.  I get tired just thinking about the list.

I was to bed at 19:30, awake by 4:30.  I like the bedtime, would like to wake at least an hour earlier.  Eight hours, if I haven't pushed too hard, if it isn't to hot or cold, if health is good, is optimal.  Yeah.  I am not prime, if I am not sure what the main problem is.  Might not be a single source.  Everything, many things, at a time or stacked.  Not dying, probably, just not doing well or able to quite catch a break.  It'll get better.

Later.

She was curious.

.
.
A query, whether sigma males ever made what she called a mistake by getting involved with alpha dames.  Well?  My problem is probably more with terminology.  I don't believe dames can be alphas.  I do believe, perhaps, that some rare few may be nephilim.  Which, to her, might be semantics.  We'd have to agree to disagree, until I could educate her.

In that latter case, then yes.  Unlike sigma women (again, not sure I believe in that species of bird, or what such might be if she should exist, as with males or some, also another form of nephilim?) and their disinterest, incapacity to deal with alpha men, sigma males can quite enjoy 'alpha' females.  There will be... hmm... friction.  But, nothing I run from, if not what I seek every time.  Now, I suspect it is difficult for 'alpha' women.  They just don't... get it.  Sex is divine.  But all else for them is difficult.  They know we rule, but don't understand how.  It infuriates them how we... manipulate in shadows.  And how we do it, especially when it works.  They want a share of glory of which we want no part.

Wow, trouble with the tub.

.
.
I have been ripping into the problem off and on all morning.  I tried several sessions of just plunging, just using a bowl over the overflow grate.  I gave up on that, pulled the grate for acces since the drain has crosssectional bars barring access that way.  No go, the snake simply can't cut that corner.  So... I put plastic over the grate, to make it watertight, then have been plunging since.  Two sessions so far.  No luck so far.  May have to just call in a plumber.  The next diy step would be to rent a motorized snake, which might require opening the pipe somewhere else, with rental being as much as a plumber, or more, on top of it.

If I do call I will see if he will do the kitchen faucet and sink plumbing plus dripping faucets while at it.  Yeah.  Which means buying a faucet while at it.  I'll get his advice on a faucet while at it.  Tired.  That isn't a lot of work, exasperated by bending or kneeling though, a lot.  Later.

Fading out and back.

.
.
I stopped being able to do anything, even write, after the last post.  I was able to stay awake to 17:00.  Actually that is almost it.  19:00 to 20:00 is the real goal.  Eight hours down sees me awake for enough of the morning to do almost anything in the day, even with a nap if needed.  The way to make that work, or longer, is to taper work and caffeine... actually all fluids, and foods... four to five hours beforehand.  Easier said than remembered.

Trouble already.  The tub is backed up.  I plunged yesterday, last night, and this morning... the right way, making the overflow airtight.  Nothing doing.  The other sinks and toilet are draining well, thankfully... not backing up into anything, the tub to the sinks or toilet or the other ways.  I'm not sure how to get the plumber snake in, or what else to do.  At least, if I decide to bail, I can flush.  And the water is rather clean.  Ugh!

Today is the day I get back to at least ketosis.  As well as cutting all sweeteners, save for the tiny bit in fatbombs, and those only before and/or after my daily meal(s).  A slug of keto stuff to start out, as after looking some things up I'll be hitting the tub sooner than not.  That blocks everything else.

As mentioned, but for the log, down at 17:00, up at 3:00.  Later.

Sigma, game theory.

.
.
Looking through youtube I saw a vid.  Caught my eye.  No, not a deep, true, believer.  And yet I have heard enough, to put some things together, including... should game be correct or reasonably in the goal zone... what I probably would be.  That is I am a sigma. Even so I doubted some woman would have a clue.  I thought she would be mocking or just so off I could chuckle.  Chicks.  *grins*

A stretch improved.

.
.
Meds probably didn't fix anything.  Tea wouldn't help.  Setting dishes up, after doing work with kefir, wouldn't fix anything.  A glass of milk wouldn't work.  A fatbomb?  Actually, maybe.  If I am truly getting into ketosis, but my body hasn't learned to pluck fat off the bones, or wherever, than tossing easy fat might give it the fuel it feels to be dying to obtain?  I really think so.  Another, then the keto slurry, and perhaps something will be done?

Plans?  Initially none.  Now?  The dishes, kitchen flat surfaces and floor including the table, and the bathroom.  A shower in there, and if timely enough then on to the post.  Yeah, better.  With nothing started this may be a delusion.  Time will tell.  I'd sure like to get to it though, then a bit of shopping tomorrow?  Groceries, mostly?  I'd like to try that pizza, though with meat toppings.  Mushrooms are fine, just never enough alone.

Never did nap.

.
.
Can't be sure, if I believe bedtime was close enough to 16:00 to just call it that.  Waking at 1:30 means extra sleep, and by health probably needed sleep.  Something is just off.  If I can get ketosis a bit deeper, then add intermittent fasting for three to five full days, I think that will help.  I have heard that, artificial or not, sweet flavors will bump ketosis.  I haven't seen that, if I have some worries about blood sugar and/or glucose.  Though just because blood sugar is up doesn't mean glucose is up, if currently only lab tests can show that... as far as standard labs can be trusted.

A bit rough this morning.  Don't want to be awake.  If too it feels as if I overslept.  Sort of between a rock and a hard place that way.  I'll do waking, then the keto juice, then figure things out from there.  I don't think I should consume the keto stuff until I am awake, can be on my feet, or it goes to waste, for parts of it's functions.

I recently heard clergy, usually rightfully, lamenting the laxity of the laity.  On hearing of one who said forty five minutes was needed to get going.  Suggested that if a gunman was at the door, if as a comparative jest, that action would be swifter.  Well, if older I can see extra time being needed.  If habituated, perhaps as well, if easier to change.  In my case, two hours is usually needed.  If a gunman was at the door, as a threat, I'd shoot him and call the police... in two hours!  Tired!

Backing down.

.
.
I just can't do much.  Food and medicine, rest and drink if less, adding keto stuff, naps, adding fatbombs to help ensure enough fat, generally doing what is right.  Simply cannot keep my feet under me. I'll keep at it as possible.

A call to mom.  She isn't feeling good.  Tired, sore.  Her doc wants to check her heart, she doesn't think so.  I don't know, but I know my only real symptom is exhaustion and my only real issue at the start was a bad heart.  It's not what she wanted to hear.  Yes, I know why.  Short call.

A double nap.

.
.
Right at four hours?  I think so.  I thought I woke at 10:00, if it doesn't seem I have been awake for an hour.  Could be though.  I didn't wake wide or quickly.  Still not all that awake if not able to sleep more.  Rot!  Oh, I am hoping to get some things done.  Do you know folk used to patronize hermits, still do.  Perhaps online?  :p

Dishes and surfaces in the kitchen.  Keeping the list small and doable.  If/as things are marked off a single replacement will be added.  A long list, today, is not going to help.  Might fall asleep rereading it.  And I won't be starting for another hour.  Or more.  Trash?  Not much to go out unless I start digging into storage.  Ugh, don't want to contemplate that now, but maybe.

Not much happening. A good time for a nap.

.
.
Just can't focus, yet.  Don't want to burn the day, more of it, off uselessly.  Going down at 5:58.

Heavy lungs. And some get it wrong.

.
.
Coughing water, if I think my plan is paying dividends.  Not literally coughing water, of course.  Well, externally.  There is a pool in the lower lungs though.  It might limit my work, the weight of the fluid and slight reduction in lung capacity sort of cause weariness.  Then again... time will tell.

Oh, mistakes?  I think some people really get things wrong.  Your choice.  Fear if you wish.  Only, if you have become less than nothing, have had many faces, and have seen through many eyes in time and places, the voice or presentation is correct or not based on truths independent of one's personal sense.  That in no way mitigates objective reality, mind you.  Two plus two only, always, and everywhere equals four and just that.

Worn.

.
.
Waking at 22:30 after going to bed at 15:30?  Okay, not as bad as first thought.  And yet, given health, more sleep would have been good.

Weighing in, up significantly, I was initially upset.  Then I realized the problem.  While I have been fasting, I have been drinking a lot of fluid, more than the usual high side of three gallons and nearing four and more.  As well I am not peeing enough.  Why?  That is something I'll have to figure.  It started before beginning the keto slurry, so it's not that.  I am not seeing swelling in the legs or feet, if I have cause to believe the torso, definitely lungs, are wetter than they should be.  An extra water pill for a day or three... gotta watch that too.  Ugh.

On another note, cheking ketones yesterday, despite bad inputs as recently as Thursday, maybe Friday, the readings showed nearing forty.  The slurry seems to work.  I have a dose already going down.  It tastes like an oversweet (if artificially) lemonade, with very mild grit.  No artificial to the goop, so  it is easily tolerated.  The mix is taurine crystals, ketone crystals, and an electrolyte gunk of either lemon or cherry pomegranate flavor.  Yeah, fasting can run you right out of electrolytes, especially if drinking a lot (which usually induces more voiding).  Though the water pill and it's mechanics is probably the main culprit?  Yeah.  That all leads to a potassium loss.  So, beside adding lots of potassium I am adding either minerals as supplements or trying this drink additive.  The fuss to just do what I can!?!

Today?  If able: finish all dishes, check laundry, kitchen surfaces and floor as with bathroom... AND GLASS OUT OF TUB, then the nook... whatever I can do there.  No need to cook.  One portion of potk heated.  As well, when dishes are done, a pot of beans to go on.  Some for refried, some to experiment with a (lower carb) baked bean recipe.  Gotta have sides, if more severe limits to portions really has to be imposed.  Hmm, perhaps rice to?  Only a cup or even an half cup of that a day, max.  But you can really add fats through butter with rice.

Who knows though.  Without shoveling in the way, more may be done than that, by far. Or less.  I can never tell until it is done or I am.  Later.

No nap, bedtime?

.
.
I believe so.  Could try more keto mix.  The truth is I am satisfied with what was done.  I am tired from the work done. And while I am not making progress digging further into the day, I will end up being awake fifteen hours, having cooked two roasts, created enough fatbombs to see me through a week or two, done the dishes at least once, started kefir on the raw milk, shoveled the drive and walk, and... yeah, there was a bit more.  So, I'm good with sleeping.

A funny thing?  There were shards of glass in the tub, shower floor.  I was... unwise in my exhaustion... I just kept washing.  I can't be sure why the bottoms of my feet weren't shredded.  Don't worry, I'll get that out before next time.  Weird but true.

Good afternoon and night.

Rather good.

.
.
A call.  I suspected wrong.  Not my mother even if I called her recently and didn't get a response.  *cough*  The neighbor?  Ah a delivery!  What can I say, I like deliveries, some more than others.  In an hour I was told.  So?  Well...

I was at the last batch of fatbombs.  The one out of the freezer I wanted to work, the peanut butter blend could handle to cool.  Then?  Snow removal.  There was only four to six inches, covering only two thirds of the drive... so I grabbed the shovel.  Then salted.  I was just about to hop in the shower when they arrived.

All good.  A bit of talk, trying to not talk too much.   And yet it is good to converse regarding events and news.  I try to listen, more, now.  I can talk so fast.  All good in their camp, save one with... time and life changing events.  To be expected.  I think I surprised by shoveling.  By the way, I almost thought to pray that this storm be mild, then decided that wasn't best.  Not sure if it is over.

After, I poured the peanut butter chocolate mix into the molds, then put it up.  The other mixes separate, I'll have to work on that.  The last mix seems to stay mixed.  Either my ratios are off, people tolerate it for short-term use, or my ingredients are a sliver off.  These really are mostly starter foods, then rare treats.  Still, if possible, I will seek to improve, possibly perfect.  Then a shower.  Those are loverly things.

Next?  Possibly a nap after I dry and cool off a bit.  I lit the interal furnace today.  Then the pork roast and dishes.  And more.  Who knows, especially with that keto mix.  Keto is really coming together.  With holy fasting taking flank and massages in the rearview mirror, who knows.  Who ever knows?  Later.

One never knows.

.
.
I must admit I didn't think, feel, as if anything I did would help.  The slurry has more than ketone crystals, another addition is taurine.  Anyway, the keto go stuffs were mixed inwith tea.  Pretty hard to gulp though not terrible of taste, just... different.  As I was sitting, surfing, doubting... somewhere in there... my feet found themselves, then put the hands where the will could deploy them, and...  The beef roast was readied.  I season then set for an hour... to both better tenderize and spice the meat, salt pepper and an italian blend.  The timer is set, first to sear then roast.

Not finished.  I then set up some of the dishes, more than half but not so many they would hold me up.  Then a short break.  Before I realized Iwas back on my feet tinkering with fat bombs.  All I have is the better coconut oil.  On the good side I love the taste of coconut, if not the harder fiber chunks (which aren't in the oil, just saying).  Oh my.  Really easy, and quite tasty!  Unfortunately I only have one pop mold, which, mostly, takes on batch per shot.  Next batch will be blended, then cooled, then blended again. No real complaints, just for appearances, though a bit for taste.

The timer already went of, so g the skillet is being warmed.  The dishes were hit once in there too.  Beef is now browned and roasting.  Who knew this stuff worked.  Don't want to use it every day.  Actually it is just starter, fast restart, stuff.  Other timer just sounded, fat bombs... might be ready or... another sampling either way!  I'll give it another twenty?  Meh, I'll leave it alone until after supper, have one or two for desert.

Even if that is all that is done, not bad.  I suspect dishes, several more batches of fat bombs, and the kitchen surfaces will be done.  Oh, and the bathroom plus a shower... already cleaned the bowl, if the lid can get another shot in the shower when I finish in there.  Nice, and keto and fasting friendly.  Amen?  You know?  I think so.  Again.  Amen!

Later.

Awake with hope.

.
.
The hope is that of the hopeless.  There are saints for the impossible, and lost.  Not my soul, spirit, but ability to life seems hidden.  Still, plans.

The goals haven't changed.  I have, mostly, maintained what has been accomplished.  A few dishes and pot and pan need washed.  A few glasses, utensils, large and table, have to go in.  Honestly the rest is staying even.  Which means clearing and cleaning of surfaces, clearing the nook, hall, and laundry floors, cleaning the bathroom, a shower, and food.  Food needs to be worked first.  I realize I am fasting, even now, as much because I can't keep up on food as anything else.  I am using keto grains, once so far, in an attempt to source energy.

I'll hit the grains shortly in hopes of that allowing cooking.  After that I'll see what can happen.  I am hoping six to eight ounces of beef works from that point, and more keto grains if work continues and extra energy is needed.  I won't check bp until tomorrow or the next day, give the stuff a chance to work and besides checking daily is... obsessive.  Not absolutely sure anything will be done.  For cooking, food prep, two roasts and fat bombs are the wants.  Chocolate, peanut butter, and a mix.  I'm not so worried about carbs, at least not to that point.  Assuming I can get it done in the first place.

Awake at 12:30(ish).  Been waking for... an hour and an half already?  Bleh!  Later.

Ah, that time again.

.
.
Little done.  Medicine was reset, plus adding supplements.  Hmm, other than eating, taking meds, feeding and watering the girls...  Oh, awake to the late hour.  That does take it out of me.  Hmm, right, will check the cat litter, feed them again, then off to bed.  I am guessing by 15:40?  Give or take ten.

Worried or hopeful?

.
.
I never can tell, not always, fully, what is considered.  Though I suspect a notion down to a few probabilities.  In this case a fear or hope, dealing with reported bp.  High?  Oppresively.  It's only been this high for a week, maybe nearing two... by feel.  I have had it average 217/170 for six months.  No, one does not make the other good.  The worst merely adds perspective.  The song pulled from back?