.
.
No, having nothing to do with God. God? I know is real. So... I suppose I am no longer, technically, a commonly termed believer. Knowing has nothing to do with faith, or belief. I saw, otherwise sensed. God is. I would die before denying it. At this point, denying would be... essentially... a sin against the Holy Ghost. It would be the worst form of death.
This is dealing with diet, weight loss, and such. Impossible. Even when I eat right, by my understanding, and do this and that... or not but keep inactivity in consideration... I haven't been able to lose weight. So... why would this be different, this time? I don't know. Perhaps, I thought, that tracking food might actually make a difference? Aye, but could it curb appetite? Bah!
So, I weighed in three days ago. I put in 280, but it was actually 281.6... I believe. I just... I don't know... was being a bit of a spoiler? Being a punk? A bit. Yes. And I have been logging, and approximating consumption. It seems probably fairly accurately. My guru suggested weighing in daily, but I... in spite of trusting... didn't... believe? Didn't want to face the truth of failure? Didn't... believe... I just didn't believe, so didn't want to know it was false.
I decided to eat today. Breakfast was and will be two ounces of salami and cream cheese, half a cup of diced yellow onions, and a fatted coffee using a tablespoon and an half of cream. That was about 586 calories (ish). That leaves nearly 1100 calories for the rest of the day. I have chicken thighs brining. One or two in a salad, skinless, one with skin on, warm. That'll be about six to eight hundred calories, I would guess... leaving just a bit more for a supper.
Yes, I found the scale, pulled it out, cleaned it up, and pressed it into service. I measured, within reason. An extra .2 ounces on the salamin, if only 1.9 ounces of cream cheese... there are limits to fuss. And I accounted for the differences in the food log... it allows for less than whole numbers. I will, from now on, weight everything. I suppose I could go to grams, but I don't see that as all that much different. But, the food wars have begun they have.
And? I stepped on the scale. Of course, there would be no difference. I would have lost nothing. I knew that. I was quite wrong. In three days, if two days of fasting, I have gone from 281.6 to 276.1... a five and an half pound change. It couldn't be water loss. I take large doses of the water pill. If anything, I have missed at least one of those, so am probably holding on to more than usual water! No... that was weight loss!
Okay, I am hooked. There... might be something to this. Of course, figuring out which foods, how much, and in my particular situation, is another thing. The food blogger helps, but I really need a bit more foresight. Just plugging in, then adjusting consumption values, is a bit dangerous. I need to attempt to create near weekly food plans. This is much more difficult than they say. You really can't just wing it.
Still, that was... a wakeup call. I am really interested. Yeah. This might actually work. I have decided I probably won't go too far. Perhaps to 240? I don't want the flaps of skin. Some people think that is okay, I just don't. Some proportion between appearance and health will be good enough. I wonder how much skin removal would cost. Seriously, I won't have extra skin hanging off me for years, or decades... something is just... wrong with that... to my mind. I have never heard of anyone getting rid of that naturally. Anyway... I would be happy at 240... it might not be perfect, but it would be better. Perhaps enough to become active... more active.
I'm still not a complete believer. It might be a fluke. It might not be sustainable. It might be just from fasting in a way I can't necessarily maintain. But... I am going to go ahead, as full steam as possible. There... is some hope. Then again, when I went into this, hope was all I had, for faith was nonexistent and charity, on this matter, was long gone. We will see.
Tuesday, September 1, 2020
The beginning.
.
.
The third day of fasting starts today. I don't know if I will complete it as a day of fasting. Not complete fasting, I had three coffees with a tablespoon of milk or cream in those two days, amounting to about 140 calories. But, for practical purposes, I fasted. Further, I was up and about, doing a bit more than usual. Now, nothing was consumed since Monday, last, morning. Blood sugar is 155 fasting though.
It is the artificial sweetener. Even cut, even limiting how much I use, it will drive up blood sugar. Especially if it is all that is being consumed. I just can't always go without anything. I have cut to between four and seven drops per half gallon of tea, three drops for a quart of fatted coffee... usually. Oh well, it... will just have to do.
With yesterday partly sidelined, if happily, today I will get back to it. And I realize I owe another fifty... for some work done. I wish he would speak up. Then again, perhaps his exact memory is as bad as mine. Anyway... Today is back to that work. Dishes, a check on laundry, counters, sweeping, and some general cleaning. I hope to do another load of laundry, and put that out on the line.
Again, tonight, chill. It is 37° outside, it was 68° upstairs without fan or anything, 66° in the main, and 55° in this room with the door open and a fan on low. Wow. It's almost getting time to turn the furnace on. I more worry when it gets to near freezing in here, worried more about pipes than else. Well, and the girls. I'm not sure cats handle serious cold for long periods.
I keep losing track of medicine. When I thought I had lost serious track, I was only half a dose behind. Now I am... two or three doses behind. Still, it's been over a month and an half, otherwise, of not missing a dose, or missing it long enough to count. I'll... get back on it. I do my best. Will take it until I find out if weight loss will happen. My guru in this actually lost weight solely based on calorie counting. But no bad heart or other health issues. And, yes, that might be a limiting factor. It kills the natural metabolism. Will see soon. Recommended weighing in daily. I haven't been. Should start. By a month, perhaps several, on and I will know if calorie counting alone can cut the weight or not.
Later.
.
The third day of fasting starts today. I don't know if I will complete it as a day of fasting. Not complete fasting, I had three coffees with a tablespoon of milk or cream in those two days, amounting to about 140 calories. But, for practical purposes, I fasted. Further, I was up and about, doing a bit more than usual. Now, nothing was consumed since Monday, last, morning. Blood sugar is 155 fasting though.
It is the artificial sweetener. Even cut, even limiting how much I use, it will drive up blood sugar. Especially if it is all that is being consumed. I just can't always go without anything. I have cut to between four and seven drops per half gallon of tea, three drops for a quart of fatted coffee... usually. Oh well, it... will just have to do.
With yesterday partly sidelined, if happily, today I will get back to it. And I realize I owe another fifty... for some work done. I wish he would speak up. Then again, perhaps his exact memory is as bad as mine. Anyway... Today is back to that work. Dishes, a check on laundry, counters, sweeping, and some general cleaning. I hope to do another load of laundry, and put that out on the line.
Again, tonight, chill. It is 37° outside, it was 68° upstairs without fan or anything, 66° in the main, and 55° in this room with the door open and a fan on low. Wow. It's almost getting time to turn the furnace on. I more worry when it gets to near freezing in here, worried more about pipes than else. Well, and the girls. I'm not sure cats handle serious cold for long periods.
I keep losing track of medicine. When I thought I had lost serious track, I was only half a dose behind. Now I am... two or three doses behind. Still, it's been over a month and an half, otherwise, of not missing a dose, or missing it long enough to count. I'll... get back on it. I do my best. Will take it until I find out if weight loss will happen. My guru in this actually lost weight solely based on calorie counting. But no bad heart or other health issues. And, yes, that might be a limiting factor. It kills the natural metabolism. Will see soon. Recommended weighing in daily. I haven't been. Should start. By a month, perhaps several, on and I will know if calorie counting alone can cut the weight or not.
Later.
Monday, August 31, 2020
Something else to do.
.
.
I was asked to go along for a few things. Mostly just a passenger. So I went. Which means dishes didn't get done. I did get in to shop, a few groceries. However, some things I thought I could do, I can't... later. I can't make a dinner tonight. I need to crash for a bit. I should be up for something in a bit, but... maybe not?
It is overcast and less than 70°. I think it was somewhere around 63°? Crazy. And it might rain.
I am feeling rather awful. I'm not sure how to change that. Aspirin might help, but last time it did nothing. Not even with sleep. It is worth the risk. A quick text, to arrange some things, some aspirin and regular meds, then on to a nap. Achy, out of sorts. Ah... two days of fasting, I should have been in bed hours ago, and lots on my mind.
Blood sugar, without anything, is at 125 fasting of course. Later.
.
I was asked to go along for a few things. Mostly just a passenger. So I went. Which means dishes didn't get done. I did get in to shop, a few groceries. However, some things I thought I could do, I can't... later. I can't make a dinner tonight. I need to crash for a bit. I should be up for something in a bit, but... maybe not?
It is overcast and less than 70°. I think it was somewhere around 63°? Crazy. And it might rain.
I am feeling rather awful. I'm not sure how to change that. Aspirin might help, but last time it did nothing. Not even with sleep. It is worth the risk. A quick text, to arrange some things, some aspirin and regular meds, then on to a nap. Achy, out of sorts. Ah... two days of fasting, I should have been in bed hours ago, and lots on my mind.
Blood sugar, without anything, is at 125 fasting of course. Later.
Pieces and parts.
.
.
It took a while longer to get started than had been hoped. Still, I was able to complete the pj's, the two I could find, in just a few minutes less than an hour. Sewing won't ever quite be my primary skill, but it went much better, faster, and smoother this time. If those pockets tear loose, it'll be from a serious incident. I don't think the pj's will last as long as the pockets... even with my penchant for hording keys, knives, flashlights, and other bits of metal and etcetera man devices in my pockets, chipmunk style.
The laundry was given a second round of drying. I could have hung it out, but am not quite up to that. Hopefully the cooling will help with energy. More so now that I can moderate it, have the gear, clothes, attitude, knowledge... I have layering all together, now just to learn and do it. Not always going to be possible, but... the benefits make it likely if at all possible.
I'm about to hit dishes. Then get laundry checked, then upstairs if it is dry. Oh, but I best get trash out. They could arrive early. A bit of cleaning around the kitchen and bathroom, then a shower and to bed. It is up to 54° outside, last I checked. Oh... I will feed and water the ducks as a last thing before bed. It'll still be rather cool, but either the eggs make it to hatching or they don't. I'm giving them until, say, the 20th. Then it's back to collecting them.
.
It took a while longer to get started than had been hoped. Still, I was able to complete the pj's, the two I could find, in just a few minutes less than an hour. Sewing won't ever quite be my primary skill, but it went much better, faster, and smoother this time. If those pockets tear loose, it'll be from a serious incident. I don't think the pj's will last as long as the pockets... even with my penchant for hording keys, knives, flashlights, and other bits of metal and etcetera man devices in my pockets, chipmunk style.
The laundry was given a second round of drying. I could have hung it out, but am not quite up to that. Hopefully the cooling will help with energy. More so now that I can moderate it, have the gear, clothes, attitude, knowledge... I have layering all together, now just to learn and do it. Not always going to be possible, but... the benefits make it likely if at all possible.
I'm about to hit dishes. Then get laundry checked, then upstairs if it is dry. Oh, but I best get trash out. They could arrive early. A bit of cleaning around the kitchen and bathroom, then a shower and to bed. It is up to 54° outside, last I checked. Oh... I will feed and water the ducks as a last thing before bed. It'll still be rather cool, but either the eggs make it to hatching or they don't. I'm giving them until, say, the 20th. Then it's back to collecting them.
Not even September.
.
.
It broke 40°, by a couple degrees, on the last day of August. It... is cold out there, boys and girls. It is almost frighteningly so. In a secular way. If this is any indication of what is coming, it is a serious sign. Though, who knows. It might just be a spoof to get the flock chirping. Or to quiet down, watch, and listen? Something like that.
Laundry has been turned, dishes were freshly reset. Not much else yet. Still, I am hoping to finish those dishes, reset most of the remaining dishes, hit a few counters, and then sweep and maybe mop in the bathroom and kitchen. Oh, and take the trash to the curb then shower and be to bed by... when I can sleep? Yes, that would be when.
Rather than continuing to surf the web in a lost way, and with the puzzle completed... if I have others... I do believe I will work on the pockets of my winter weight pj's. I wore the pair which had been repaired. I hadn't done a great job. It wasn't lined up well, the stitching was... irregular, I didn't stitch correctly, I even started in the middle on one of the pockets. Still? Those pockets are solid! It may not have been pretty, but it was overstitched, near to bombproof, unless... no... the knots were extremely well built in as well.
If I ever have to mess with pockets, it will a total replacement, or patching a hole, from wear. I have three more pj's to fix. It actually takes a little while to sew. This time, I have some understanding, and experience. I have figured a few things out. Rolling and pinning first, this time. Starting at the ends... I only started in the middle out of a curiosity, mind you. That wasn't as I had hoped. Anyway. A few of those. Then back to dishes. Just one load of laundry today.
I will, later, after work, sleep, and a wake, find the packaging for returning the items. Those will go back tomorrow. As well as some shopping. Groceries. I like having food on hand. Fresh, canned, frozen, meat, veggie, some fruit, and else. You will find keto is much easier if you buy mostly fresh. And, yet, totally fresh is nearly impossible. That is why they used to be so skinny, that isn't, wasn't, will never be, healthy. I wonder if the really skinny have mild brain damage, to be honest.
Anyway... *digging more holes to step in* I'd best get to it. I'll give the dishes an hour to cool off enough to try to wash, then set to a rinse. Sewing the whole time, maybe after I finish. Checking on laundry as well... though it may well be dry. I'm liking the cool. It is... much easier to negotiate, and I can control my end much more easily with the right clothing and gear. Good day, night, whatever.
.
It broke 40°, by a couple degrees, on the last day of August. It... is cold out there, boys and girls. It is almost frighteningly so. In a secular way. If this is any indication of what is coming, it is a serious sign. Though, who knows. It might just be a spoof to get the flock chirping. Or to quiet down, watch, and listen? Something like that.
Laundry has been turned, dishes were freshly reset. Not much else yet. Still, I am hoping to finish those dishes, reset most of the remaining dishes, hit a few counters, and then sweep and maybe mop in the bathroom and kitchen. Oh, and take the trash to the curb then shower and be to bed by... when I can sleep? Yes, that would be when.
Rather than continuing to surf the web in a lost way, and with the puzzle completed... if I have others... I do believe I will work on the pockets of my winter weight pj's. I wore the pair which had been repaired. I hadn't done a great job. It wasn't lined up well, the stitching was... irregular, I didn't stitch correctly, I even started in the middle on one of the pockets. Still? Those pockets are solid! It may not have been pretty, but it was overstitched, near to bombproof, unless... no... the knots were extremely well built in as well.
If I ever have to mess with pockets, it will a total replacement, or patching a hole, from wear. I have three more pj's to fix. It actually takes a little while to sew. This time, I have some understanding, and experience. I have figured a few things out. Rolling and pinning first, this time. Starting at the ends... I only started in the middle out of a curiosity, mind you. That wasn't as I had hoped. Anyway. A few of those. Then back to dishes. Just one load of laundry today.
I will, later, after work, sleep, and a wake, find the packaging for returning the items. Those will go back tomorrow. As well as some shopping. Groceries. I like having food on hand. Fresh, canned, frozen, meat, veggie, some fruit, and else. You will find keto is much easier if you buy mostly fresh. And, yet, totally fresh is nearly impossible. That is why they used to be so skinny, that isn't, wasn't, will never be, healthy. I wonder if the really skinny have mild brain damage, to be honest.
Anyway... *digging more holes to step in* I'd best get to it. I'll give the dishes an hour to cool off enough to try to wash, then set to a rinse. Sewing the whole time, maybe after I finish. Checking on laundry as well... though it may well be dry. I'm liking the cool. It is... much easier to negotiate, and I can control my end much more easily with the right clothing and gear. Good day, night, whatever.
Sunday, August 30, 2020
Cold can be handled.
.
.
The drop in highs and lows, plus fewer hours of heat, was crashing my paradigm. This time I have a plan. I just... wasn't quite expecting to have to need it this early. Warmer clothes. I tried an extra layer here, a bit more there, ended up figuring out what I need. It will always be a bit of trial and error, but... layering works.
Socks. But not just wool socks. Also an undersock. Wool just won't do it alone, and my feet are hard on wool. I finally have all that I need to regularly wear those. And am prepared to do so. I also have long underwear, of various types, tops and bottoms. I don't quite need those yet, but will be ready this year. Finally, I have everything ready for cold weather, and have started deploying it. Oh, and in the cart are items by which to darn some of my wool socks with holes in the heels. Yes, it's worth it. Priced good wool socks lately? Yikes!
I went on to bed with socks on. I did need to take them off a few hours in, but I slept better being warm enough to sleep well! It makes sense, but doing what is right and needed takes... a certain level of awareness I don't always have. But, this year, it is on. I will always keep myself warm enough. As well, I have become heat tolerant, so... life should improve. Oh, yes, it will.
From now on, if I sense discomfort, my job it to fix it. It isn't just for comforts sake, it is in an attempt to become more functional. I will always have problems with that, but I can optimize from my end... that and pray. My life... that it continues... is a God thing. Every doctor I have had for the last thirty years knows I should be dead, should have been dead before some of them were out of med school... or even grade school for the younger ones. That I have dead cat bounce is... well... unusual. Anything I can do is from half in the grave. Not... bad... for a dead guy.
Dishes, and laundry. Then a shower and setting up more dishes. That is all I will focus on tonight, save cleaning off a couple of counters for ease of finishing the dishes. Well, and trash. I have most of it out, but need to bag trash cans. And, perhaps, get a bit more out. Sunday, right? I... lost... time in there somewhere. It feels like I hit Thursday and just got stuck. I'll bet I've missed medicine? It got cold, of a sudden, and I... lost myself in there, in that.
No food today, at least so far. I may yet, as I am tinkering in the kitchen area, get chicken brining and then going. A chicken salad would be good, especially with still warm chicken. Though a single thigh, with skin on... as a treat... would be a delight. Yes, I have to cut, give, surrender... if I want to lose weight. BUT... I don't have to cut everything, every time. I will be struggling with controlling calories for a while, so if I slip, as long as I am honest, I will... take it. Honesty in reporting is primary, the rest will happen as it does. The rest is useless without honesty. If I can get back to absolute keto, and intermittent fasting, calorie control becomes much easier.
Later.
.
The drop in highs and lows, plus fewer hours of heat, was crashing my paradigm. This time I have a plan. I just... wasn't quite expecting to have to need it this early. Warmer clothes. I tried an extra layer here, a bit more there, ended up figuring out what I need. It will always be a bit of trial and error, but... layering works.
Socks. But not just wool socks. Also an undersock. Wool just won't do it alone, and my feet are hard on wool. I finally have all that I need to regularly wear those. And am prepared to do so. I also have long underwear, of various types, tops and bottoms. I don't quite need those yet, but will be ready this year. Finally, I have everything ready for cold weather, and have started deploying it. Oh, and in the cart are items by which to darn some of my wool socks with holes in the heels. Yes, it's worth it. Priced good wool socks lately? Yikes!
I went on to bed with socks on. I did need to take them off a few hours in, but I slept better being warm enough to sleep well! It makes sense, but doing what is right and needed takes... a certain level of awareness I don't always have. But, this year, it is on. I will always keep myself warm enough. As well, I have become heat tolerant, so... life should improve. Oh, yes, it will.
From now on, if I sense discomfort, my job it to fix it. It isn't just for comforts sake, it is in an attempt to become more functional. I will always have problems with that, but I can optimize from my end... that and pray. My life... that it continues... is a God thing. Every doctor I have had for the last thirty years knows I should be dead, should have been dead before some of them were out of med school... or even grade school for the younger ones. That I have dead cat bounce is... well... unusual. Anything I can do is from half in the grave. Not... bad... for a dead guy.
Dishes, and laundry. Then a shower and setting up more dishes. That is all I will focus on tonight, save cleaning off a couple of counters for ease of finishing the dishes. Well, and trash. I have most of it out, but need to bag trash cans. And, perhaps, get a bit more out. Sunday, right? I... lost... time in there somewhere. It feels like I hit Thursday and just got stuck. I'll bet I've missed medicine? It got cold, of a sudden, and I... lost myself in there, in that.
No food today, at least so far. I may yet, as I am tinkering in the kitchen area, get chicken brining and then going. A chicken salad would be good, especially with still warm chicken. Though a single thigh, with skin on... as a treat... would be a delight. Yes, I have to cut, give, surrender... if I want to lose weight. BUT... I don't have to cut everything, every time. I will be struggling with controlling calories for a while, so if I slip, as long as I am honest, I will... take it. Honesty in reporting is primary, the rest will happen as it does. The rest is useless without honesty. If I can get back to absolute keto, and intermittent fasting, calorie control becomes much easier.
Later.
Didn't see that coming.
.
.
I watched Star Trek as a kid, on the television. I used to think television, back then, was okay, until I reviewed much of it. Same thing then as now. Still, it was what was done. I did enjoy S.T. That and Batman and a few others. Some reruns, some new. Anyway, I was looking around on youtube and found something that through me.
At first I... wondered if it was an episode I had missed, or an episode where things where somehow different but nearly the same, maybe an episode they never published. I watched part of one, but then realized what the gig was about, so when to find the first episode. You know, for what it is, it was very well done. Amazingly well done.
I don't think I'll watch more. The problems with the original, and television in general, persist. Still, it was a... interesting spin through time and space, without having to go anywhere. I thought I'd leave it, for those who don't mind modernity, and might actually enjoy the episodes. I'll leave you to it, with a slight pleasure at having been so well baffled.
It's about time to crash again. I've gotten a load of laundry started, collected and got trash out after emptying cat litter in part or whole and switching out one of the pans. I suppose I could feed the girls again... no, probably treat them. I'll feed them fully later. I've had two fatted teas, but with much less cream. Just a tablespoon and an half, per... that's still 86 or so calories per, if memory serves. I ought to check about whole milk and half and half... Bleh.
It is only 77° outside, at nearing 14:00. It is staying very cool indoors, of course. Partly cloudy, or hazy? A strange day out there. Oh... one way to cut calories of the chicken thighs... between a third and half fewer calories... would be to remove the skin, or at least not eat it. I do love the skin. But between more and fattier? I'd... take more. Doing my best. As well, I could use some of the skinless meat in a salad... stretch one, add something better to the other.
I think I do have four hens. Very odd. Their growth was so variable. The drakes grew quickly, but a few of the hens sporadically grew quickly, then slowly. I... I think so. Oh, and my trick, of putting food and water near the hutch, is making life easier on the broody hen. She all but thanked me for the change. If she yelled at me for peaking in. Women!
Well, on to a nap. Later.
.
I watched Star Trek as a kid, on the television. I used to think television, back then, was okay, until I reviewed much of it. Same thing then as now. Still, it was what was done. I did enjoy S.T. That and Batman and a few others. Some reruns, some new. Anyway, I was looking around on youtube and found something that through me.
At first I... wondered if it was an episode I had missed, or an episode where things where somehow different but nearly the same, maybe an episode they never published. I watched part of one, but then realized what the gig was about, so when to find the first episode. You know, for what it is, it was very well done. Amazingly well done.
I don't think I'll watch more. The problems with the original, and television in general, persist. Still, it was a... interesting spin through time and space, without having to go anywhere. I thought I'd leave it, for those who don't mind modernity, and might actually enjoy the episodes. I'll leave you to it, with a slight pleasure at having been so well baffled.
It's about time to crash again. I've gotten a load of laundry started, collected and got trash out after emptying cat litter in part or whole and switching out one of the pans. I suppose I could feed the girls again... no, probably treat them. I'll feed them fully later. I've had two fatted teas, but with much less cream. Just a tablespoon and an half, per... that's still 86 or so calories per, if memory serves. I ought to check about whole milk and half and half... Bleh.
It is only 77° outside, at nearing 14:00. It is staying very cool indoors, of course. Partly cloudy, or hazy? A strange day out there. Oh... one way to cut calories of the chicken thighs... between a third and half fewer calories... would be to remove the skin, or at least not eat it. I do love the skin. But between more and fattier? I'd... take more. Doing my best. As well, I could use some of the skinless meat in a salad... stretch one, add something better to the other.
I think I do have four hens. Very odd. Their growth was so variable. The drakes grew quickly, but a few of the hens sporadically grew quickly, then slowly. I... I think so. Oh, and my trick, of putting food and water near the hutch, is making life easier on the broody hen. She all but thanked me for the change. If she yelled at me for peaking in. Women!
Well, on to a nap. Later.
Sometimes it just doesn't work out.
.
.
I am just going to give up on the phone. I can't get the volume up well enough to hear easily, voicemail doesn't work, it doesn't work with the earbuds I purchased, or those are not working. Plus
two cases... one was going to be returned anyway. I can't replace the protective screen, of course. But all else is going back, save a wireless charger.
I am thinking about getting out of the smartphone system. I'm not interested in buying $1k phones that last a few years, or even $500 phones. They don't work well, they steal data, they are expensive, and their dealers are obnoxious. I really don't need a smart cell phone, perhaps a cell phone at all. I'll see if they have a simple flip phone, and make sure it works before leaving.
Tech is a joke. Tech support is as bad. They don't seem to know how things work, how they are supposed to work, or how to get them to work. It shouldn't be that difficult. Days, and hours each day, spent trying to get a simple service to work, after days just getting the phone to work. If, too, it looks like the service provider was trying to make the phone hang. Can't trust anyone. My mother received a new phone. Just went flip phone too. Troubles with it as well. Still, it's cheaper. If I must pay for a crappy phone, might as well pay less.
I have to wonder what happens if more people quit cell service? I don't see many doing it. Even those who are broke and unemployed seem to find a way to keep their phones. Or are the providers not shutting off service for non-payment at the moment? Would hate to see an addiction get squelched? I am really thinking about just getting out of the phone thing. Land lines aren't really any better. All by mail? That would really get em' mad. All good. Thinking on it.
I did a check. I can have two thighs for dinner or supper, and still have enough calories to have two more... or the equivalent... for food today. I am just learning how to calculate calories and such. I may have to change some of my food preferences... fewer calories? More food available to eat! I really like feeling full. And two, even four, thighs, for pretty much a whole day, is fairly slim. Chicken breast, my mother says. She may be right, if I will have to practice cooking it. More expensive, but buy it with skin, and bone in, and diy it for some savings.
Oh, I did call her again today. To find out how she made goulash. She has two methods. I want to try the method which is new to me, but that would require either two pans or that I consume pasta. *sigh* I hate tempting choices. I called again, because something seemed off the other day. I could have just let it go, but I... wanted to check. Being homebound is really bothering her. I understand. I've been, mostly, stuck at home for the last thirty years. Even when I was in college, it was a brutal thing... to get out even a few times a week. I loved being out, but it hurt so much. It's taking a toll on her. I can't help, but I could call and talk a bit more... try to have something to talk about. Questions she might be able to answer. I do worry, a bit, more so now.
Later.
.
I am just going to give up on the phone. I can't get the volume up well enough to hear easily, voicemail doesn't work, it doesn't work with the earbuds I purchased, or those are not working. Plus
two cases... one was going to be returned anyway. I can't replace the protective screen, of course. But all else is going back, save a wireless charger.
I am thinking about getting out of the smartphone system. I'm not interested in buying $1k phones that last a few years, or even $500 phones. They don't work well, they steal data, they are expensive, and their dealers are obnoxious. I really don't need a smart cell phone, perhaps a cell phone at all. I'll see if they have a simple flip phone, and make sure it works before leaving.
Tech is a joke. Tech support is as bad. They don't seem to know how things work, how they are supposed to work, or how to get them to work. It shouldn't be that difficult. Days, and hours each day, spent trying to get a simple service to work, after days just getting the phone to work. If, too, it looks like the service provider was trying to make the phone hang. Can't trust anyone. My mother received a new phone. Just went flip phone too. Troubles with it as well. Still, it's cheaper. If I must pay for a crappy phone, might as well pay less.
I have to wonder what happens if more people quit cell service? I don't see many doing it. Even those who are broke and unemployed seem to find a way to keep their phones. Or are the providers not shutting off service for non-payment at the moment? Would hate to see an addiction get squelched? I am really thinking about just getting out of the phone thing. Land lines aren't really any better. All by mail? That would really get em' mad. All good. Thinking on it.
I did a check. I can have two thighs for dinner or supper, and still have enough calories to have two more... or the equivalent... for food today. I am just learning how to calculate calories and such. I may have to change some of my food preferences... fewer calories? More food available to eat! I really like feeling full. And two, even four, thighs, for pretty much a whole day, is fairly slim. Chicken breast, my mother says. She may be right, if I will have to practice cooking it. More expensive, but buy it with skin, and bone in, and diy it for some savings.
Oh, I did call her again today. To find out how she made goulash. She has two methods. I want to try the method which is new to me, but that would require either two pans or that I consume pasta. *sigh* I hate tempting choices. I called again, because something seemed off the other day. I could have just let it go, but I... wanted to check. Being homebound is really bothering her. I understand. I've been, mostly, stuck at home for the last thirty years. Even when I was in college, it was a brutal thing... to get out even a few times a week. I loved being out, but it hurt so much. It's taking a toll on her. I can't help, but I could call and talk a bit more... try to have something to talk about. Questions she might be able to answer. I do worry, a bit, more so now.
Later.
Dropped into the cold zone.
.
.
I was upstairs working on the puzzle. I had sorted most of the sides, and piles roughly by color... to the ability space allowed. Then last time I put most of the sides together, and went on to put about a fifth, sixth... probably a bit less, together. This time? I... couldn't stop. I finished the thing. It was 70° upstairs, pretty much throughout.
When I finished and came downstairs, I was freezing. I didn't check right away. A bathroom break, putting fresh hot tea on, treating the girls if only Sassy showed up. I checked the outside temperature. It is 45°. Inside, it was 66° in the main, 64° in the front room. I've shut some of the windows, and turned off all but the ceiling fan, which will be shut off shortly... always miss something.
While I am still, mostly, winter preferring, it always takes a bit to adjust. And... it... sure got cold in a hurry. This isn't actually cold. But given that it was 90° a day or two ago, and slid drastically in just a few days... day? It'll take a bit to get back in trim. If I hope, even as a cold weather guy, this isn't it. As strange as things have gone though, it wouldn't surprise me. I'll have to dress a goodly lot warmer if so. Yea... told you... this isn't going to go down well. Weather, that is.
I best get something warmer on, right over my summer wear. And a robe too. I am definitely looking forward to hot tea. I wonder how many still believe in global warming? It was just propaganda to send manufacturing to nations with no regulation and jack up production using slave labor. I think the world has to go back to diy... persoanlly and nationally. Like it? It'll be more expensive, but superior. Actually being more expensive is superior, if it doesn't seem like it. People don't buy what they don't need, as they often do today. Or buy things which really aren't... needed... functionally useful. Yea, I know whatfore I speak.
Later.
.
I was upstairs working on the puzzle. I had sorted most of the sides, and piles roughly by color... to the ability space allowed. Then last time I put most of the sides together, and went on to put about a fifth, sixth... probably a bit less, together. This time? I... couldn't stop. I finished the thing. It was 70° upstairs, pretty much throughout.
When I finished and came downstairs, I was freezing. I didn't check right away. A bathroom break, putting fresh hot tea on, treating the girls if only Sassy showed up. I checked the outside temperature. It is 45°. Inside, it was 66° in the main, 64° in the front room. I've shut some of the windows, and turned off all but the ceiling fan, which will be shut off shortly... always miss something.
While I am still, mostly, winter preferring, it always takes a bit to adjust. And... it... sure got cold in a hurry. This isn't actually cold. But given that it was 90° a day or two ago, and slid drastically in just a few days... day? It'll take a bit to get back in trim. If I hope, even as a cold weather guy, this isn't it. As strange as things have gone though, it wouldn't surprise me. I'll have to dress a goodly lot warmer if so. Yea... told you... this isn't going to go down well. Weather, that is.
I best get something warmer on, right over my summer wear. And a robe too. I am definitely looking forward to hot tea. I wonder how many still believe in global warming? It was just propaganda to send manufacturing to nations with no regulation and jack up production using slave labor. I think the world has to go back to diy... persoanlly and nationally. Like it? It'll be more expensive, but superior. Actually being more expensive is superior, if it doesn't seem like it. People don't buy what they don't need, as they often do today. Or buy things which really aren't... needed... functionally useful. Yea, I know whatfore I speak.
Later.
Saturday, August 29, 2020
Pains come, pains go.
.
.
Yea, well, it looks like they are gone. Or at least what remains is under the radar. I think there is some still there, in various places. Just not enough to peak through my... defenses? Something. I don't know what time I went to bed... Oh, but I called my mother as I was going on to bed. That was a quarter after noon, then we talked until around noon thirty. I fell asleep almost immediately after. Waking just at twenty thirty, so... a right sleep.
I had to push to get out of bed. Not all constancy is in place, but it is improving. I can't always prayer, going into sleep or coming out of it. Working on those things. You don't set things aside and just pick them back up at your best. As well, I have installed and am deploying a food log, with calories, weight loss goals, and possibly more in time. It lists micronutrients, fats... carbs... fiber... and proteins... plus at least a few other things, of course, such as calories.
About the food logging. It will, already has, hurt my feelings. Then again, today, I knew I was pushing the line. If too, I put in a little more than I think I actually ate... slightly... going over rather than under. Still, it said I ate way over what I thought I ate. On the good side, I didn't go over maintenance calorie consumption, I knew I was overeating, and as mentioned it was under the weight gain caloric consumption level. Still, it jarred me how little I can really eat. I LOVE to eat, when I eat.
It will take a bit to get the proportions down. But I am, now, scientifically, trying. It's not just going by natural inclinations and extremely rough guesstimates. Pounds, ounces, cups, teaspoons, and the rest. Which also means I may begin cutting fats... to cut calories, subtracting fiber from carb sums, and doing whatever else it takes. Which may include adding more chicken and more turkey to my protein lineup... At least the daily meals were well within keto macros... micros? Too tired for things to sound right or be snappily on my mind's fingertips quite yet. Blood sugar was very high though. Oh well. Volume. Then again, I don't usually eat that much.
It was 68° upstairs and outside when I woke, 73° downstairs in the main, and 78° in this computer front room. I opened everything up, including upstairs. I put the ducks in. It's already dark by 20:30, or pretty much. Yea. I may start feeding and watering the ducks in the entryway. I should clean that out, open it up, give them some space. To make it a shorter run for the broody hen. Especially as the world cools. Still, I'll keep the pool open as long as possible, and keep the door open so they can forage as is possible.
So many startups. Actual dieting, praying, a return to chastity. All going... well... okay. A start. Back to puzzles too. Which reminds me, I should go up and spend an hour or two on that. As well, I hope to begin cleaning and organizing in the kitchen, bathroom, and food storage area. I really hope to have the bathroom and kitchen sorted, mostly, by Monday... then absolutely finished by Friday.
If so, I will go on a hike... up the Wellsville mountain, but the fast hard way, or try to find the slower easier slope? I won't take much... flashlights, firestarters, waterproof light overgear, a warmer overshirt and possibly woolen leggings, plus food and water enough for a few days. Maps won't really help up there. Maybe a tarp or pup type tent... lightweight but waterproof. Hmm... I best get a smaller pack set up. Someone stole one of them, but on my trip from Iowa. Or in Iowa. Or when I got back, before I could get it in the house. I... can't be sure... about killed myself on that return trip. And I can't be sure when it went missing. I have... a system I can break down to a small system though...
It isn't thirty miles away, or the trailheads. Or as a crow flies. I look at it every time I look south from my home. I wonder if it looks back? It has been calling for quite some time, either way.
Later.
.
Yea, well, it looks like they are gone. Or at least what remains is under the radar. I think there is some still there, in various places. Just not enough to peak through my... defenses? Something. I don't know what time I went to bed... Oh, but I called my mother as I was going on to bed. That was a quarter after noon, then we talked until around noon thirty. I fell asleep almost immediately after. Waking just at twenty thirty, so... a right sleep.
I had to push to get out of bed. Not all constancy is in place, but it is improving. I can't always prayer, going into sleep or coming out of it. Working on those things. You don't set things aside and just pick them back up at your best. As well, I have installed and am deploying a food log, with calories, weight loss goals, and possibly more in time. It lists micronutrients, fats... carbs... fiber... and proteins... plus at least a few other things, of course, such as calories.
About the food logging. It will, already has, hurt my feelings. Then again, today, I knew I was pushing the line. If too, I put in a little more than I think I actually ate... slightly... going over rather than under. Still, it said I ate way over what I thought I ate. On the good side, I didn't go over maintenance calorie consumption, I knew I was overeating, and as mentioned it was under the weight gain caloric consumption level. Still, it jarred me how little I can really eat. I LOVE to eat, when I eat.
It will take a bit to get the proportions down. But I am, now, scientifically, trying. It's not just going by natural inclinations and extremely rough guesstimates. Pounds, ounces, cups, teaspoons, and the rest. Which also means I may begin cutting fats... to cut calories, subtracting fiber from carb sums, and doing whatever else it takes. Which may include adding more chicken and more turkey to my protein lineup... At least the daily meals were well within keto macros... micros? Too tired for things to sound right or be snappily on my mind's fingertips quite yet. Blood sugar was very high though. Oh well. Volume. Then again, I don't usually eat that much.
It was 68° upstairs and outside when I woke, 73° downstairs in the main, and 78° in this computer front room. I opened everything up, including upstairs. I put the ducks in. It's already dark by 20:30, or pretty much. Yea. I may start feeding and watering the ducks in the entryway. I should clean that out, open it up, give them some space. To make it a shorter run for the broody hen. Especially as the world cools. Still, I'll keep the pool open as long as possible, and keep the door open so they can forage as is possible.
So many startups. Actual dieting, praying, a return to chastity. All going... well... okay. A start. Back to puzzles too. Which reminds me, I should go up and spend an hour or two on that. As well, I hope to begin cleaning and organizing in the kitchen, bathroom, and food storage area. I really hope to have the bathroom and kitchen sorted, mostly, by Monday... then absolutely finished by Friday.
It isn't thirty miles away, or the trailheads. Or as a crow flies. I look at it every time I look south from my home. I wonder if it looks back? It has been calling for quite some time, either way.
Later.
Rain.
.
.
Just a few drops. It soundly as if would really hit. Just as it got going it slowed down. In the light of dawn there is no trace that it rained. It isn't even as cool as it was yesterday, at 52° this morning. With a hen sitting the eggs, I leave them in until it warms a bit. She will go with the waddling, but the waddling does go back in and join her at her sitting. They are a tight-knit group of paddlings, on or off the water. It amazes me how cold-hearty even the indian runners are, and probably doubly the muscovys. Eggs not so much? I did move the pool closer, that might help. Still, it is rather cold. Strangely cold.
It is down to 68° in the main downstairs, 66° in the computer room, 68° upstairs. Very... odd... how it's warmer outside this morning, and yet much cooler inside. I suppose cumulative and drastic changes add up very quickly. Ac's were turned off, save one on fan. And one fan upstairs. I made my bed, this time tucking the blankets at the feet. That may not work, I may have to pull the blankets up and around my feet rather than have a toebox. Will know soon enough.
There is no turning the furnace up, upstairs. There is no heat. Usually, when I get used to the cold, that isn't a problem. Though my tolerance for cold is weakening. Age... Wool socks, undersocks if that isn't enough, thick pj's, perhaps woolens as well. I can handle the cold, one way or another. It's the heat that can be a real problem. Actually, I am really set for winter this year. Inside, and out, if I could get out. I'd like to camp out there, possibly, sometime. And snowshoe a bit. Even if it kills me.
It looks like it could gather and rain sometime again today. Though, too, it may just fly on by.
I am hungry. I will eat. Something. Later.
.
Just a few drops. It soundly as if would really hit. Just as it got going it slowed down. In the light of dawn there is no trace that it rained. It isn't even as cool as it was yesterday, at 52° this morning. With a hen sitting the eggs, I leave them in until it warms a bit. She will go with the waddling, but the waddling does go back in and join her at her sitting. They are a tight-knit group of paddlings, on or off the water. It amazes me how cold-hearty even the indian runners are, and probably doubly the muscovys. Eggs not so much? I did move the pool closer, that might help. Still, it is rather cold. Strangely cold.
It is down to 68° in the main downstairs, 66° in the computer room, 68° upstairs. Very... odd... how it's warmer outside this morning, and yet much cooler inside. I suppose cumulative and drastic changes add up very quickly. Ac's were turned off, save one on fan. And one fan upstairs. I made my bed, this time tucking the blankets at the feet. That may not work, I may have to pull the blankets up and around my feet rather than have a toebox. Will know soon enough.
There is no turning the furnace up, upstairs. There is no heat. Usually, when I get used to the cold, that isn't a problem. Though my tolerance for cold is weakening. Age... Wool socks, undersocks if that isn't enough, thick pj's, perhaps woolens as well. I can handle the cold, one way or another. It's the heat that can be a real problem. Actually, I am really set for winter this year. Inside, and out, if I could get out. I'd like to camp out there, possibly, sometime. And snowshoe a bit. Even if it kills me.
It looks like it could gather and rain sometime again today. Though, too, it may just fly on by.
I am hungry. I will eat. Something. Later.
Sleep?
.
.
Soon. It's just one of those things. I can't force it. It isn't happening. So... I... don't sleep!
Ah, but there is this. Enjoy, or don't. Some of my favorites. I'm not just rock.
Later.
.
Soon. It's just one of those things. I can't force it. It isn't happening. So... I... don't sleep!
Ah, but there is this. Enjoy, or don't. Some of my favorites. I'm not just rock.
Later.
Friday, August 28, 2020
Ever so slightly better.
.
.
A headache persists, but it's milder. My torso still feels rough, but not as rough. All edges to all pains and discomforts have been rolled to a softer edge. The pains aren't sharp, dulled either through easement or familiarity... or dulling of the sensing through constant grating. I won't take aspirin. I've taken that... three times this week, and just recently. It wasn't all that useful, and it won't help again for a few days. It just doesn't.
The first part of the lawn was watered, the second part just got set up. That'll be it tonight, and maybe for a week or two. A shower shortly. I ate small pickles and green olives. I don't think that will be enough. Hmm... perhaps a burger or two? Grilled? Maybe. I am too hungry to skip, if I can probably go light. Burgers and green beans, or peas? Yes, that... would be good. One meal for the day, though. It's still fasting, just not extended fasting.
A shower shortly. A sit. Then, maybe, a bit of cleaning, resetting dishes, and a load of laundry in. But that will probably be it. I will hang the clothes out "tomorrow", the next functional wake cycle... whenever that might be. As well, I will hit the dishes. If I can, I'll hit those yet tonight as well, and clear off the area I prefer to sort and dry them. Yea... Maybe. Or, again, the next functional wake cycle. I can be awake, but not be able to act. As, mostly, much of this week, and this day. There is tomorrow. And prayer.
So difficult. For no good reason. It could be worse. Though if that's the best you can say, you know you are against it. All good though, it's... still an opportunity. I'll take it, even if I can't sort it or do much with it on any given day. I can even chuckle about it. I have had worse, I will know worse, I won't worry about any of it. Later.
.
A headache persists, but it's milder. My torso still feels rough, but not as rough. All edges to all pains and discomforts have been rolled to a softer edge. The pains aren't sharp, dulled either through easement or familiarity... or dulling of the sensing through constant grating. I won't take aspirin. I've taken that... three times this week, and just recently. It wasn't all that useful, and it won't help again for a few days. It just doesn't.
The first part of the lawn was watered, the second part just got set up. That'll be it tonight, and maybe for a week or two. A shower shortly. I ate small pickles and green olives. I don't think that will be enough. Hmm... perhaps a burger or two? Grilled? Maybe. I am too hungry to skip, if I can probably go light. Burgers and green beans, or peas? Yes, that... would be good. One meal for the day, though. It's still fasting, just not extended fasting.
A shower shortly. A sit. Then, maybe, a bit of cleaning, resetting dishes, and a load of laundry in. But that will probably be it. I will hang the clothes out "tomorrow", the next functional wake cycle... whenever that might be. As well, I will hit the dishes. If I can, I'll hit those yet tonight as well, and clear off the area I prefer to sort and dry them. Yea... Maybe. Or, again, the next functional wake cycle. I can be awake, but not be able to act. As, mostly, much of this week, and this day. There is tomorrow. And prayer.
So difficult. For no good reason. It could be worse. Though if that's the best you can say, you know you are against it. All good though, it's... still an opportunity. I'll take it, even if I can't sort it or do much with it on any given day. I can even chuckle about it. I have had worse, I will know worse, I won't worry about any of it. Later.
Bad shape.
.
.
Every time I attempted waking, I was hit by a wall of pain. I know I haven't been sleeping enough, but it wasn't that. Kidneys, as if I'd gotten rabbit shots, my sides and forward torso flank as if I'd gotten kneed. On both sides. My neck is so out of place, beside the tension headache is nausea and a general looseness in my orientation. Not THAT orientation. That may be wonky, but it has been assigned God's settings if it does drift. No, the literal compass orientation.
I am a bit wobbly, or could be? It's odd. Just because my mind feels wobbly on my feet doesn't mean my body follows suit. I can go on the most horrific modern roller coaster ride and not feel even a bit moved. I've tried, through time, the most severe rides. Nothing. Though, it's been a while. Still, usually good on my feet. And when my mind feels woozy, my body still doesn't. I don't quite understand it, but it's good to have.
I have been to bed twice. Finally, after letting the ducks out, I got back to bed a final time. I called my mother, but she was sitting down to lunch. By the time she called back I was out like a light. I think I heard her, or someone, call. I couldn't even roll to check. Out. like. a. light. Even then, as I surfaced to the ringing, I hurt terribly. I couldn't tell what the pain was, only that there was a wall, engulfing me like river flood waters might an island. Swamped, under, just holding on... hoping there would be something left when I woke.
So, no calls, no work, and maybe none tonight. I only woke to shut the ducks safely in. Then decided to look over the lawn. The back and one section of the side are still begging for water. Most of the lawn is starting to look quite good. A couple of longer passes on the rough areas, then an hour a day on the good hours, just one area per night, for the next few days. Then I'll leave it alone for a while. Anyway, now I have to stay up for a while, to finish the watering.
While I can't work, nausea sees to that, I can have a bite and shower, perhaps later a true shave. If I feel even a tiny better after those, then maybe hit dishes, clear off a few more counters, do a load of laundry, and... yea... that would be max. If I can get that done, I would go on back to bed as the watering run ends.
It is, was at about twenty hundred... eight p.m.... down to 69° already out there! Seems fishy. So I have opened it up. It was 69° upstairs, 74° in the main, and 78° up front when I woke. A strange day. But those are now the regular highs. It is cooling. Highs are lower, they aren't as high as long, and cooling is greater in the evenings. It is almost getting cold. I had to use four blankets, if that wasn't just a temperature thing. I was ill today.
Blood sugar is 171 fasting. I think I will fast today. As weather cools, faculties will return a bit more. I am hoping to fast a couple days a week, and return to intermittent fasting. I doubt if I will go to a single meal a day, but starting with an eight hour eating window, pare that back to a four hour eating window... allowing two to three meals, even. Not all will be big, and it might just be a series of snacks. Though one big meal and grazing the rest of the time was common. Ugh.
I don't think my system allows me to lose weight. Even when I cut to two thirds of recommended calories for slugs (inactive), I haven't lost weight. I've tried fewer calories, but that... fails. Pretty quickly I am like a beast on the hunt, consuming anything and everything in search of... something. My metabolism just isn't good enough. My faculties aren't strong enough. Not even when slowly worked over years. Still, I think it is better in some ways. It's just... I should be dead. Nothing will ever fix that. Not much I can do over or beside just being alive... unless God says so Himself. Lord knows I have tried, almost to death. Surprised that five day fast didn't kill me. Bleh.
Later.
.
Every time I attempted waking, I was hit by a wall of pain. I know I haven't been sleeping enough, but it wasn't that. Kidneys, as if I'd gotten rabbit shots, my sides and forward torso flank as if I'd gotten kneed. On both sides. My neck is so out of place, beside the tension headache is nausea and a general looseness in my orientation. Not THAT orientation. That may be wonky, but it has been assigned God's settings if it does drift. No, the literal compass orientation.
I am a bit wobbly, or could be? It's odd. Just because my mind feels wobbly on my feet doesn't mean my body follows suit. I can go on the most horrific modern roller coaster ride and not feel even a bit moved. I've tried, through time, the most severe rides. Nothing. Though, it's been a while. Still, usually good on my feet. And when my mind feels woozy, my body still doesn't. I don't quite understand it, but it's good to have.
I have been to bed twice. Finally, after letting the ducks out, I got back to bed a final time. I called my mother, but she was sitting down to lunch. By the time she called back I was out like a light. I think I heard her, or someone, call. I couldn't even roll to check. Out. like. a. light. Even then, as I surfaced to the ringing, I hurt terribly. I couldn't tell what the pain was, only that there was a wall, engulfing me like river flood waters might an island. Swamped, under, just holding on... hoping there would be something left when I woke.
So, no calls, no work, and maybe none tonight. I only woke to shut the ducks safely in. Then decided to look over the lawn. The back and one section of the side are still begging for water. Most of the lawn is starting to look quite good. A couple of longer passes on the rough areas, then an hour a day on the good hours, just one area per night, for the next few days. Then I'll leave it alone for a while. Anyway, now I have to stay up for a while, to finish the watering.
While I can't work, nausea sees to that, I can have a bite and shower, perhaps later a true shave. If I feel even a tiny better after those, then maybe hit dishes, clear off a few more counters, do a load of laundry, and... yea... that would be max. If I can get that done, I would go on back to bed as the watering run ends.
It is, was at about twenty hundred... eight p.m.... down to 69° already out there! Seems fishy. So I have opened it up. It was 69° upstairs, 74° in the main, and 78° up front when I woke. A strange day. But those are now the regular highs. It is cooling. Highs are lower, they aren't as high as long, and cooling is greater in the evenings. It is almost getting cold. I had to use four blankets, if that wasn't just a temperature thing. I was ill today.
Blood sugar is 171 fasting. I think I will fast today. As weather cools, faculties will return a bit more. I am hoping to fast a couple days a week, and return to intermittent fasting. I doubt if I will go to a single meal a day, but starting with an eight hour eating window, pare that back to a four hour eating window... allowing two to three meals, even. Not all will be big, and it might just be a series of snacks. Though one big meal and grazing the rest of the time was common. Ugh.
I don't think my system allows me to lose weight. Even when I cut to two thirds of recommended calories for slugs (inactive), I haven't lost weight. I've tried fewer calories, but that... fails. Pretty quickly I am like a beast on the hunt, consuming anything and everything in search of... something. My metabolism just isn't good enough. My faculties aren't strong enough. Not even when slowly worked over years. Still, I think it is better in some ways. It's just... I should be dead. Nothing will ever fix that. Not much I can do over or beside just being alive... unless God says so Himself. Lord knows I have tried, almost to death. Surprised that five day fast didn't kill me. Bleh.
Later.
Not bad, not bad at all.
.
.
Tacos were good. I had a shell-less taco, a taco salad I suppose. It wasn't too hot, but had more than just hot spice. Including allspice and cinnamon. Tasty, really. I also made refried beans, for Boss. He prefers that. I didn't have those with formal supper, but had some with... the later dinner. Dinner? Or was the first dinner, this supper?
The backyard was watered again, and the side yard is getting hit. I think, hope, that will be it for a while. The front yard and part of the side yard look good, but part of the side yard and a portion of the back yard really were a bit rough. If they are still rough in a few days, I may hit them again. As well, I may mow in a few days... on the highest setting.
It is warmer tonight. Technically? Yea. But, it doesn't feel hot, warm even. It is almost cold... a smooth cool. It was that way before supper... dinner? the first meal. So much so I, for the first time in over a month, turned the ac's off upstairs and opened it up. It's a bit of a risk, but fresh air is splendid, and I may have done well.
An hour left for watering. I could move the sprinkler and do one place, one more hour. And I may. I really abused the side yard this year. And, yet, it is coming back fairly well. A little more water in one last area, again, could really help. Plus, staying up another hour, with as cool as it fills, might help me sleep much earlier tonight? Maybe.
I can't seem to pray as much as hoped, quite yet. I am into decades of Hail Marys' and perhaps a decade of Our Fathers, plus regular, meal, and concentrated connection prayers. I hope, as it cools, I can do a bit more. I just can't maintain focus. I even fall asleep, sometimes, with my standard prayers. You'd think I'd do that with the ten to fifteen minute quiet... receiving... part of the prayer, but usually it's during requests for the ill, the weak, the lame, the church, clergy and other religious, and such. So many of you need so many prayers! :p
I do my best. If it cools a bit, assuming I don't crash from that, and begins a slow decline, I should be able to get back to the rosary... hopefully in a month. I'd really like to add a morning and night one, and think I can... most mornings and nights. I want twice a day, for intentions. Some will be static... family, specific family, the church, but having extra for special or situational intentions is good. I never had enough of those when praying the rosary just in the mornings for that year so, various times.
I really want to sleep, but I think I will mover the sprinkler and get that done. I will be so ready to sleep when that is finished. I have an half hour and changed before it's time to move it. Tomorrow I will work on the phone, clean shelves in the basement for cans of food, shower, do dishes, and maybe hit another load of laundry. As well, clean in the kitchen. I got the stove top and a counter cleaned off tonight, and have the freezer top mostly open from a few days ago. I have paper plates. I need disposable utensils, smaller disposable plates, and styrofoam bowls... then I won't be falling behind on dishes as often or deeply. Ran out, went a bit broke... yea... Back to it. Later, or more likely good night.
.
Tacos were good. I had a shell-less taco, a taco salad I suppose. It wasn't too hot, but had more than just hot spice. Including allspice and cinnamon. Tasty, really. I also made refried beans, for Boss. He prefers that. I didn't have those with formal supper, but had some with... the later dinner. Dinner? Or was the first dinner, this supper?
The backyard was watered again, and the side yard is getting hit. I think, hope, that will be it for a while. The front yard and part of the side yard look good, but part of the side yard and a portion of the back yard really were a bit rough. If they are still rough in a few days, I may hit them again. As well, I may mow in a few days... on the highest setting.
It is warmer tonight. Technically? Yea. But, it doesn't feel hot, warm even. It is almost cold... a smooth cool. It was that way before supper... dinner? the first meal. So much so I, for the first time in over a month, turned the ac's off upstairs and opened it up. It's a bit of a risk, but fresh air is splendid, and I may have done well.
An hour left for watering. I could move the sprinkler and do one place, one more hour. And I may. I really abused the side yard this year. And, yet, it is coming back fairly well. A little more water in one last area, again, could really help. Plus, staying up another hour, with as cool as it fills, might help me sleep much earlier tonight? Maybe.
I can't seem to pray as much as hoped, quite yet. I am into decades of Hail Marys' and perhaps a decade of Our Fathers, plus regular, meal, and concentrated connection prayers. I hope, as it cools, I can do a bit more. I just can't maintain focus. I even fall asleep, sometimes, with my standard prayers. You'd think I'd do that with the ten to fifteen minute quiet... receiving... part of the prayer, but usually it's during requests for the ill, the weak, the lame, the church, clergy and other religious, and such. So many of you need so many prayers! :p
I do my best. If it cools a bit, assuming I don't crash from that, and begins a slow decline, I should be able to get back to the rosary... hopefully in a month. I'd really like to add a morning and night one, and think I can... most mornings and nights. I want twice a day, for intentions. Some will be static... family, specific family, the church, but having extra for special or situational intentions is good. I never had enough of those when praying the rosary just in the mornings for that year so, various times.
I really want to sleep, but I think I will mover the sprinkler and get that done. I will be so ready to sleep when that is finished. I have an half hour and changed before it's time to move it. Tomorrow I will work on the phone, clean shelves in the basement for cans of food, shower, do dishes, and maybe hit another load of laundry. As well, clean in the kitchen. I got the stove top and a counter cleaned off tonight, and have the freezer top mostly open from a few days ago. I have paper plates. I need disposable utensils, smaller disposable plates, and styrofoam bowls... then I won't be falling behind on dishes as often or deeply. Ran out, went a bit broke... yea... Back to it. Later, or more likely good night.
Thursday, August 27, 2020
Very odd.
.
.
It is the same temps today as yesterday. I woke cold, upstairs. Even in the computer room I am almost a bit cool at nearing eighty. As well, a window was forgotten open! Very strange. It should be a furnace down here? As mentioned, it is no different from the indoor temps yesterday. How is that even possible? Even humidity seems about the same.
As I have started to leave the hutch open, the ducks are usually in it. One of the indian runners has gone broody. It ssems, rather than have her sit alone, the whole gang goes in with her. I guess watching grass grow is even less interesting? :p It sure makes putting them up easy. I have fed them a bit extra the last few days, to make up for the missed day. Unneeded. They simply don't eat much. Actually, they are eating less than before. Perhaps the muskovys have reached aldulthood? If so, they will stop eating nearly as much, just as when human teens or younger twenties hit a certain stage, they slow down... hopefully.
I did set up dishes last night, but didn't ever get into them. I also finished off the corn. Blood sugar is a bit high this morning for it, and I am still hungry. So it goes with carby foods. I will used the cooking pot as a cleaning device, and open up some of the kitchen today, so as to make tacos. I'll just have a taco salad, if the difference in space needed to make one is no different. Hmm, best check what time supper is required.
I ended up not being able to sleep until well into morning, again. I don't quite get that. It has to do with when my body is most comfortably awake and asleep? I don't have the powers to control it. It isn't just will power. As mentioned, something broke between my intellectual will to do things and my bodies willingness to abide. Draino will do that. The body does not like pain. Some controls broke, they can't be replaced, fixed, renewed, not completely, not that I have seen. Part of my problem, albeit a side one. Though, being weakened by the heat, it makes coercion over the flesh even more difficult. It'll work out.
I haven't looked the yard over yet. Today, when putting the ducks up, I'll investigate. Perhaps another round of watering, or not? I'd really like to give it a day or two to perk back up. It takes a while to use the water, then fill back in and up as it might. Too much water, too soon, could damage it as well. First I think one thing, then I think another. I'll see shortly.
Still so tired! I may nap for another hour. Crashing again. It isn't blood sugar. Just... even if it isn't bothering me, the heat... collective. Sleep... Ugh. Later.
.
It is the same temps today as yesterday. I woke cold, upstairs. Even in the computer room I am almost a bit cool at nearing eighty. As well, a window was forgotten open! Very strange. It should be a furnace down here? As mentioned, it is no different from the indoor temps yesterday. How is that even possible? Even humidity seems about the same.
As I have started to leave the hutch open, the ducks are usually in it. One of the indian runners has gone broody. It ssems, rather than have her sit alone, the whole gang goes in with her. I guess watching grass grow is even less interesting? :p It sure makes putting them up easy. I have fed them a bit extra the last few days, to make up for the missed day. Unneeded. They simply don't eat much. Actually, they are eating less than before. Perhaps the muskovys have reached aldulthood? If so, they will stop eating nearly as much, just as when human teens or younger twenties hit a certain stage, they slow down... hopefully.
I did set up dishes last night, but didn't ever get into them. I also finished off the corn. Blood sugar is a bit high this morning for it, and I am still hungry. So it goes with carby foods. I will used the cooking pot as a cleaning device, and open up some of the kitchen today, so as to make tacos. I'll just have a taco salad, if the difference in space needed to make one is no different. Hmm, best check what time supper is required.
I ended up not being able to sleep until well into morning, again. I don't quite get that. It has to do with when my body is most comfortably awake and asleep? I don't have the powers to control it. It isn't just will power. As mentioned, something broke between my intellectual will to do things and my bodies willingness to abide. Draino will do that. The body does not like pain. Some controls broke, they can't be replaced, fixed, renewed, not completely, not that I have seen. Part of my problem, albeit a side one. Though, being weakened by the heat, it makes coercion over the flesh even more difficult. It'll work out.
I haven't looked the yard over yet. Today, when putting the ducks up, I'll investigate. Perhaps another round of watering, or not? I'd really like to give it a day or two to perk back up. It takes a while to use the water, then fill back in and up as it might. Too much water, too soon, could damage it as well. First I think one thing, then I think another. I'll see shortly.
Still so tired! I may nap for another hour. Crashing again. It isn't blood sugar. Just... even if it isn't bothering me, the heat... collective. Sleep... Ugh. Later.
Oh well?
.
.
I did try to sleep. It just wouldn't happen. To be honest, it is because it is so deliciously cool. Even down here, for the first time in... a while... it is 70° in the front room. I think the coolest I have seen it, for days, a week, weeks, has been 72°, and not for long. And... not with me active up here. I'll bet it's 68° with the potential for 66° in the main room.
I did work on the puzzle, longer than needed to finish watering. I just... it was enjoyable. The main problem with the 1000 piece set is that the puzzle pieces are too small, and the light a bit weak, up there. I do have a double and very bright desk lamp up there, with arms so I can move the lights around, plus an overhead light. It just isn't enough for a huge puzzle with smaller pieces. This one is much better. I may see about another lamp up there.
After recent ups and downs, I've been checking blood sugar more frequently. It was just 148. Not bad. Going to have a bit and a small dose. It's not the best food, fresh sweet corn. But I don't do it often. It's probably been two years since my last shot of the stuff. I'll do it a few more times before summer is out. It's an Iowa thing. Even that is pretty lame.
Hmm... back to... something... nothing. Later.
.
I did try to sleep. It just wouldn't happen. To be honest, it is because it is so deliciously cool. Even down here, for the first time in... a while... it is 70° in the front room. I think the coolest I have seen it, for days, a week, weeks, has been 72°, and not for long. And... not with me active up here. I'll bet it's 68° with the potential for 66° in the main room.
I did work on the puzzle, longer than needed to finish watering. I just... it was enjoyable. The main problem with the 1000 piece set is that the puzzle pieces are too small, and the light a bit weak, up there. I do have a double and very bright desk lamp up there, with arms so I can move the lights around, plus an overhead light. It just isn't enough for a huge puzzle with smaller pieces. This one is much better. I may see about another lamp up there.
After recent ups and downs, I've been checking blood sugar more frequently. It was just 148. Not bad. Going to have a bit and a small dose. It's not the best food, fresh sweet corn. But I don't do it often. It's probably been two years since my last shot of the stuff. I'll do it a few more times before summer is out. It's an Iowa thing. Even that is pretty lame.
Hmm... back to... something... nothing. Later.
A brutal day.
.
.
It isn't just the heat. Or even the heat, to a degree, mostly. It is the heat adding up over time, eroding my tolerance. Yesterday it was as if I had no tolerance left. Today was a goodly bit better. Though waking before it gets too hot helps. As well, I am going to have to go upstairs and cool off, perhaps shower or bath a few times a day, and possibly nap a time or two a day. It's beating me harshly.
Even with the sleep interruption, I was up earlier today. I felt better, mostly. I have gone through moments of extreme exhaustion, with headaches, and else. I have taken aspirin twice today, if I think the second time was a waste. This is the first time in months? A month? I have been taking medicine, regularly and well, so it isn't that. It's just the heat.
I need to make a few calls tomorrow, along with trying to clean up. I really need to clean, but I am so broken down. Do it anyway! Well, yes, there is that. Which works unless it doesn't. The thousand piece puzzle upstairs was just too much, for a starter puzzle. I have several five hundred or so puzzles. I put the 1000'er away and pulled a 550... I think. I have begun sorting, will do a bit more yet tonight.
I am up for a while, as I am finishing watering the lawn. As of tonight, every inch has been watered once, for at least an hour, over the last three days? Something like that. I will look the lawn over tomorrow, let it go another day or two if that seems reasonable, and hit it all, but very little, one last time before leaving it go again. It seems to have recovered better than I thought it would. It wasn't horrible, but it was looking a bit rough. I do enjoy keeping the lawn kempt, as possible.
I was sure, when it rained last night, that we would be getting rain for a while. Not so much. Not at all. It was just a short, nothing, rain, leading to nothing else. The hurricane(s?) might end up bringing something, as last time, but I wouldn't count on it. It would have to go the wrong way, again. I was surprised with the first one. If it doubles down, it tells me something is very wrong.
I did contact the contact I had been given. I was already ahead, having an account already. The rest, as I explained, will take some time. Heat is beginning to fray my cord. If I can manage things a bit better, getting up into the cool, bathing or showering more, napping, and possibly working on top of those things, I might be able to figure this tech out a bit quicker than otherwise.
Yes, a bit of puzzle play, as I wait for the last watering zone to finish. I hate getting sprayed... until I love it. I might have to go out and get a facefull of sprinkler before going on to bed. Still so very hot. It is reading 74° here at the computer, so odd. Bleh. Later, or most likely good night. I think I will crash early and well... and rather soon.
.
It isn't just the heat. Or even the heat, to a degree, mostly. It is the heat adding up over time, eroding my tolerance. Yesterday it was as if I had no tolerance left. Today was a goodly bit better. Though waking before it gets too hot helps. As well, I am going to have to go upstairs and cool off, perhaps shower or bath a few times a day, and possibly nap a time or two a day. It's beating me harshly.
Even with the sleep interruption, I was up earlier today. I felt better, mostly. I have gone through moments of extreme exhaustion, with headaches, and else. I have taken aspirin twice today, if I think the second time was a waste. This is the first time in months? A month? I have been taking medicine, regularly and well, so it isn't that. It's just the heat.
I need to make a few calls tomorrow, along with trying to clean up. I really need to clean, but I am so broken down. Do it anyway! Well, yes, there is that. Which works unless it doesn't. The thousand piece puzzle upstairs was just too much, for a starter puzzle. I have several five hundred or so puzzles. I put the 1000'er away and pulled a 550... I think. I have begun sorting, will do a bit more yet tonight.
I am up for a while, as I am finishing watering the lawn. As of tonight, every inch has been watered once, for at least an hour, over the last three days? Something like that. I will look the lawn over tomorrow, let it go another day or two if that seems reasonable, and hit it all, but very little, one last time before leaving it go again. It seems to have recovered better than I thought it would. It wasn't horrible, but it was looking a bit rough. I do enjoy keeping the lawn kempt, as possible.
I was sure, when it rained last night, that we would be getting rain for a while. Not so much. Not at all. It was just a short, nothing, rain, leading to nothing else. The hurricane(s?) might end up bringing something, as last time, but I wouldn't count on it. It would have to go the wrong way, again. I was surprised with the first one. If it doubles down, it tells me something is very wrong.
I did contact the contact I had been given. I was already ahead, having an account already. The rest, as I explained, will take some time. Heat is beginning to fray my cord. If I can manage things a bit better, getting up into the cool, bathing or showering more, napping, and possibly working on top of those things, I might be able to figure this tech out a bit quicker than otherwise.
Yes, a bit of puzzle play, as I wait for the last watering zone to finish. I hate getting sprayed... until I love it. I might have to go out and get a facefull of sprinkler before going on to bed. Still so very hot. It is reading 74° here at the computer, so odd. Bleh. Later, or most likely good night. I think I will crash early and well... and rather soon.
Wednesday, August 26, 2020
Finally... duck feed.
.
.
I saw it coming for a week. I just couldn't get out. The heat, some other things. Troubled week. Today should have been better, but waking to deal with a crashing blood sugar blew the potential for a good day. Still, I ran out yesterday. I don't mind them going hungry a few times a month, or less. But not two days in a row. So I had to get out, even though it meant I couldn't do other things. Bleh.
Four bags, I think fifty pounds per. They were out of 18%, so I went with 20% protein. More is okay, less not so much. I helped get them to my cargo area, then had to unpack on my own. It's around 90° out there. Ugh. I set up the pool with fresh water, stored some of the food dry, still bagged, some was poured into the 'to use' bin. Oh, some happy ducks. I can still hear them chittering, quacking, and enjoying.
On the way back, I saw corn for sale. I wasn't sure I read the price right, so added a dollar just to be sure. A dozen for either later tonight, when it cools, or tomorrow night. I haven't had fresh corn... for a long time. Sure, carbs, shut up.
I did get a shower in. Toe nails trimmed, feet scales mostly removed. I powdered and sprayed my most used shoes, and feet actually. Summer is harsh on things, socks or no, socks shoes, or no. I'm about to crash. Might have to take a bit of a nap. I checked with Boss, haven't heard back. May have to nag. We aren't married, so... nagging is legal! :p Wait... is that the other way around? I'll have to ask a woman, then... take the opposite of what they say. Is that also a form of nagging? Cheers!
Later. Or much later.
.
I saw it coming for a week. I just couldn't get out. The heat, some other things. Troubled week. Today should have been better, but waking to deal with a crashing blood sugar blew the potential for a good day. Still, I ran out yesterday. I don't mind them going hungry a few times a month, or less. But not two days in a row. So I had to get out, even though it meant I couldn't do other things. Bleh.
Four bags, I think fifty pounds per. They were out of 18%, so I went with 20% protein. More is okay, less not so much. I helped get them to my cargo area, then had to unpack on my own. It's around 90° out there. Ugh. I set up the pool with fresh water, stored some of the food dry, still bagged, some was poured into the 'to use' bin. Oh, some happy ducks. I can still hear them chittering, quacking, and enjoying.
On the way back, I saw corn for sale. I wasn't sure I read the price right, so added a dollar just to be sure. A dozen for either later tonight, when it cools, or tomorrow night. I haven't had fresh corn... for a long time. Sure, carbs, shut up.
I did get a shower in. Toe nails trimmed, feet scales mostly removed. I powdered and sprayed my most used shoes, and feet actually. Summer is harsh on things, socks or no, socks shoes, or no. I'm about to crash. Might have to take a bit of a nap. I checked with Boss, haven't heard back. May have to nag. We aren't married, so... nagging is legal! :p Wait... is that the other way around? I'll have to ask a woman, then... take the opposite of what they say. Is that also a form of nagging? Cheers!
Later. Or much later.
Almost.
.
.
Almost a good night. Things were done early enough that getting to bed early was possible. As well, it was cool enough to begin shutting down earlier as well. Everything came together for an early bedtime. A last meal, and on to bed. But... a few hours into sleep and I woke... wrong. Something felt really off. Ah, blood sugar. 65 Oddly, it is up to 231 this morning. Usually a single roll of the things and a light meal won't shoot it up like that. Oh well.
So, a round of glucotabs. I didn't need two, this time. Though I had a couple of leftover brots as well. I had to babysit it, until I felt better and could return to bed. I... just don't get that. At least I know how to fix it. I just wish I hadn't had to wake up, spend a couple of hours tinkering with it, while I could have been getting a better sleep.
Still, to bed early enough that I am waking in the early afternoon. I have enough time to get a shower, go buy bird feed, and still get dinner ready... doing some cleaning while at it? Probably.
As to hanging out clothes? Excellent. I thought it would take many, or several, hours to dry. Nope. I checked three hours after, maybe two, and dry as bones. I had some heavy shorts, with extremely heavy duty pockets. Not even a spot of moisture in the pockets, or when I folded the hem over the line. Now, my fear... and exhaustion... kept me from hanging out the second load. I didn't want them out overnight, figured... rightly... it would rain. Yes, I was that tired. So I just put them in the dryer. What was hanging was put on just as the other laundry was put in. What was put out was dry faster than the dryer finished. Weird, but... now I know.
A quick shower than a drive for feed. Four bags holds me fairly long. Though, that was, mostly, with three birds. With nine now, it... I will go much faster. Oddly, these new birds don't even double the feed requirements. Even as growing chicks, sort of, and still. I put enough feed in, that at the end of the day there is some left. I had been putting out two to three cups, gauging by the previous day how much to put back in. Putting in too much and backing it down until there is just a bit left. Now I am just putting out three to four cups. These ducks forage a great deal more. Oh, I am allowing a broody duck to do her thing. I'll know by, say, the twentieth of next month if anything pops.
Yea. I keep trying. I may try to build a few nesting boxes out there. I'm not certain about the indian runners, but the muscovys will go broody up to three times a year. I don't think they are in that stage yet. Will know before long. As mentioned, extra brooding boxes might help. Just those plastic bins, with a door, or two, cut in them. I really don't know what I am doing, and am not certain anyone on youtube knows any better. Still, I'll give it a go. Later.
.
Almost a good night. Things were done early enough that getting to bed early was possible. As well, it was cool enough to begin shutting down earlier as well. Everything came together for an early bedtime. A last meal, and on to bed. But... a few hours into sleep and I woke... wrong. Something felt really off. Ah, blood sugar. 65 Oddly, it is up to 231 this morning. Usually a single roll of the things and a light meal won't shoot it up like that. Oh well.
So, a round of glucotabs. I didn't need two, this time. Though I had a couple of leftover brots as well. I had to babysit it, until I felt better and could return to bed. I... just don't get that. At least I know how to fix it. I just wish I hadn't had to wake up, spend a couple of hours tinkering with it, while I could have been getting a better sleep.
Still, to bed early enough that I am waking in the early afternoon. I have enough time to get a shower, go buy bird feed, and still get dinner ready... doing some cleaning while at it? Probably.
As to hanging out clothes? Excellent. I thought it would take many, or several, hours to dry. Nope. I checked three hours after, maybe two, and dry as bones. I had some heavy shorts, with extremely heavy duty pockets. Not even a spot of moisture in the pockets, or when I folded the hem over the line. Now, my fear... and exhaustion... kept me from hanging out the second load. I didn't want them out overnight, figured... rightly... it would rain. Yes, I was that tired. So I just put them in the dryer. What was hanging was put on just as the other laundry was put in. What was put out was dry faster than the dryer finished. Weird, but... now I know.
A quick shower than a drive for feed. Four bags holds me fairly long. Though, that was, mostly, with three birds. With nine now, it... I will go much faster. Oddly, these new birds don't even double the feed requirements. Even as growing chicks, sort of, and still. I put enough feed in, that at the end of the day there is some left. I had been putting out two to three cups, gauging by the previous day how much to put back in. Putting in too much and backing it down until there is just a bit left. Now I am just putting out three to four cups. These ducks forage a great deal more. Oh, I am allowing a broody duck to do her thing. I'll know by, say, the twentieth of next month if anything pops.
Yea. I keep trying. I may try to build a few nesting boxes out there. I'm not certain about the indian runners, but the muscovys will go broody up to three times a year. I don't think they are in that stage yet. Will know before long. As mentioned, extra brooding boxes might help. Just those plastic bins, with a door, or two, cut in them. I really don't know what I am doing, and am not certain anyone on youtube knows any better. Still, I'll give it a go. Later.
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