A shower!

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I can't say how long it has been?  A week?  Three?  Five?  Strange as it seems, I was still clean?  Don't ask.  I have ways of checking.  The water was clean, that which left me.  Still, good to... take a shower.  I love those things, even if I am not sure I really need them.  Desert life?  Highland desert doubly so?  Maybe.

The cave has been staying in the mid 70s.  It was 73 down here when I woke, 80 outdoors.  I did turn the ac on, when I came down.  Turning off the one upstairs as I came down.  When, if, it cools, I'll open up... turn everything off, save maybe a few fans.  Life really isn't too bad, with the additional ac.

Gaming, of course.  Tinkering with a totally different build, a mage rather than a swordswinger.  Easier?  It is supposed to be, but there are difficulties too.  The method to the madness is different.  It is supposed to be easier, I'll find out.  I was using a bow, with the warrior, to pull from groups.  With the mage, there may be methods of pulling, though the bow will still come in handy.  The thing is I lost the ability to use some of my better bows.  I'll... see if I can fix that.  Somehow.

So tired.

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So pleasantly cool though too.  It's 70/70 in the house, downstairs.  I have it partly closed up.  About to finish that, then go on to bed.  Hoping upstairs is cool as well.  Should be.  It was 52, the coolest I saw it this morning.  That is... excellent, for cool, this time of year.  Problem is, it really should be more like 70, even at night.  For a while.  Things need more heat to grow.

From the years I went out on mosquito spraying?  If it was below 50, they had to shut down.  Mosquitoes need to be flying, but at 50 or lower they go on to bed.  Interesting the things you learn, if you listen.  Now, usually, only right at the beginning, and near the end of August, if usually more into September, temps would hit the 50's, or less.  Not in the middle of July.  A different year.  A cold year.  Very possibly continuing.

Doing well enough in gaming.  I'd like to scramble into a ton more levels, just haven't had much gumption.  Same with the last bosses.  There are two more, definitely, in the main game.  Maybe another one or two I simply missed, didn't know about, plus three to five in the dlc.  Those are beastly though, even at my level, which is now meta plus (the pvp generally agreed max level).  Then again, I don't mess with pvp.  So I would like more.  Grinding, which is boring, and initially dangerous.  Oh, and I need parts... pieces... for the game.  Not sure where to "farm" those.  Will look up shortly.

So ready for bed though!  It has been a wonderful night.  When I wake, some sort of keto pasta, burger, and tomato or mushroom soup sort of thing.  

Cooler still.

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Down to 56 outside.  Nice, really.  With everything open, and fans going, it is down to 72/74 downstairs.  Not sure about upstairs.  Too tired to check.

Just a bit more gaming, then I'll go on to bed.  I let the burger cool.  Did I mention it?  I fried a few more burgers, and then just loose hamburger.  Eating the patties, I let the crumble cool.  I just bagged that, then put it in the fridge.  Probably make a keto spaghetti tomorrow.  Or something.

I did get the litter boxes rearranged.  Fresh water for Sassy, earlier.  And feeding through the night.  I do my best for her, which really hasn't been too bad.

Cooler.

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It's not even midnight and it is to 63.  It might well drop into the mid 50s?  As such, I have turned ac's off and opened the windows and a door.  Fresh air, but real cool.  Fans are going to beat hell, there is no air movement out there.  Not even sure the fans will help.  But, fresh air is worth the risk.

Dreams.  A dream?  People from my past, friends, family, women... people who believe in being, living, rightly.  Expecting it of others and themselves?  I get a lot of hate from some of those folks.  But... why?

I do my best.  I don't negotiate much, true.  I definitely am not perfect.  But, when I live, even if I am by nature and in many ways wrong, I... choose to live objectively correctly.  As a... different?  I know better.  Which means I won't try to live like what isn't, even if my instincts tell me I can, or should.

Oh, well, yea.

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I have been awake since 16:30?  For four hours, that is.  I think.  Sleep was good.  It was down to 73/75 upstairs, with that ac and fans on high mind you.  Can't be sure about outside, but I thought it was 85.  Hotter, earlier, would be my guess.  But weather systems are coming through, cooling things off?  It was overcast, though that doesn't always mean much.  But, 85 is a cooler day, for hereabouts, at that time.  Oh, and downstairs, it is 73/81.  With ac on.  And some fans.  One more ought to be turned on, when I do the litter boxes.

Sassy was fed, water changed, and attended.  I'll check her litter shortly.  Been keeping up with here pretty well.  Her boxes need more.  Since the litter is still pretty good, I'll put all of what is there in one box, then refresh the other box.  Then, on the first, redo the box I am filling with old litter today?  Something like that.

Getting through the game.  There are... three, or four, bosses remaining.  Including dlc game portions?  Something like that.  The dlc sort of sucks.  Some of it is just... brutally hard.  Though it may be set up to not allow a guy through, unless he has beaten the main game.  Or make it more difficult?  The bosses suck, too.  Far too hard.

Though I still suspect the game requires a certain number of deaths before letting one pass.  Some of them can only be beaten by "cheesing" them (using... unsportsman like methods... though whatever that really means in the ways of war of men, beast, and other) or through luck.  You can't beat them with skill.  You simply can't be good enough.

I'll fry burgers, again, and fry the rest of the burger as beef crumble.  I really do like that.  Can add it to lettuce/salad, or add tomato and keto "pasta", or just put it in with beans and cheese.  Beans aren't perfectly keto, but... there are limits.  A few times a month.  It's just the way of it.

I must admit, I worry about mother.  Not... dying... suffering.  But, too, I think she understands.  And, does her best.  I won't let my pain take me down, I won't let her pain bring me too down either.  Actually, I add that to the suffering I offer for those in purgatory.  If you end up there, you'll... understand.  Especially if I can name you.  I name many, who may be there.  Could be in hell, some of them.  But I... have hope.  There are people I love, and will... risk being wrong about.  I've... been there.  I've done that.  I pray, by name, for some of those who I have concern regarding.

Then again?  In absolute truth?  It is less the ones who did a terrible thing, in a terrible time, due to great suffering.  I worry far more about those who lived a pleasant life, lived long, lived their own way, and died without issue.  I fear for them, the most.  And, I pray for them, too.  There were no corrections gained, or sought, in their lives.  The worst, is for those who... nobody is sorry they are gone.

Well... on to some more gaming.  But which area or boss?  Ugh.  I really don't like bosses.  Those are... as I see it... game stoppage.  Those aren't the fun part.  Same with some mini-bosses, sub-bosses, lieutenants.  Some of those are worse, and they return.  Some of them.

Well?

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It is down to 60, but it doesn't mean a thing.  No air movement, humid?  Seems like it.  I have the upstairs open, and the fans going.  But that just doesn't mean much.  I still have it closed up and the ac running downstairs.  It keeps it moderately comfortable.

It stayed warm, until another storm went through.  Even then, it just dropped to 70.  And stayed there for a very long time.  It settled in ten, then two five degree increments.  It just wouldn't budge, then it would drop, then it would stick.  It isn't a comfortable 60 outside.  Nor is it all that comfortable inside.

90, out there.

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75/76 upstairs.  Or was.  I shut everything off and down as I came downstairs.  My feet hurt, the skin on them.  Haven't been wearing compression socks.  Just... never could get to it.  Too tired, didn't feel like it.  Those are a lot of work, and hot in the heat.  I want to, I just don't.

Downstairs it is 73 in the main, 78 in this front room.  Good enough.  Sure beats the high 70s or higher, as lows.  I'm hoping to take a shower shortly.  Wearing compression socks, but just knee-high.  And, medical grade, not the odd types they offer for those who can't really handle hefty compression.  No, these... hurt to put on, even though my feet and legs and such aren't all that swollen.  Puffy, but not even 30% swollen, let alone 250%.  Ugh.  Why the skin hurts, though?  I think it's just the slight puffiness, along with the heat.

I would work, but I really can't.  Coffee, shortly.  Some gaming, to wake.  A shower, tending Sassy, other than feeding.  Fed her right off.  I think I was to bed at between six and seven?  Up at 16:00.  Doing what I can, but not in complete control.  At least I am sleeping and waking near full days, if gaming and cooking is as much as I can do.

Down to 62, outdoors.

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Staying, to me, a balmy 74 to 75, at the coolest.  If with ac and fans off.  No wind, and rather humid?  Seems so.  Oh well.

I did get burgers fried tonight.  Not smash burgers, but really large juicy patties.  Probably half pounders?  While I stick with the idea that a quarter pounder is the perfect hamburger sized burger, if I believe two or three is best.  That is for smash burgers.

For... rare occasions, large chunks of browned burger are quite good.  Six minutes on one side, four on the other.  I could probably go five and three?  Will try next time.  As well, more canned veggies.  Not bad at all.  All I used for spice and else was salt and pepper.  Perfect.

A storm coming through.

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If it rained, it was very light.  Though I think, so far, only a sprinkling here and there.  A quick check makes me think we got a bit more than I had thought.  The flattop griddle has water left on it.  Not deep, but... plenty to suggest a good bit of rain, or really a solid sprinkling for a bit.  Beaded up.  It is set to drain, so this is only what remained after draining, the fat holding on to some.  And some probably evaporated.

The thing is, it dropped the temp to right at 71, if that had come done another degree since.  Wind came through, with it.  Are we already heading back into the monsoon season?  I am beginning to think so.  Usually that is an August thing, sometimes clouds in the early part of August, though more later in the month.  And, rain?  That isn't normal.  It's unusual even in August.  So, yes.  But, El Neno, or Nena?  Whichever.  It's still in play, and strongly it seems.

An okay sleep?

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Waking at 14:30, warm.  Not too hot, but definitely warm.  Ac can only do just so much.  Upstairs, near me, it was 77.  In the rest of the upstairs it was more like 75.  That will often leave me sick.  Fans and ac helped, I guess.  As I don't feel too wretched.

Downstairs is 73 in the main, 80 up front here, and 93 outside.  Brutal.  A shower may help the ac, giving it something to bite.  Then I'll be ready to start in on dishes.  I don't even have that many, it's just that work of any sort is pushing it beyond my ability, lately.  Focus, energy levels, etc.  With meat thawed, and being cooked, then going in, there is some hope that things will improve.

Medicine is continuing.  Doing what I can.  Still surprised I am still alive.

I tried.

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The heat just got to me.  Even with the ac going, it only got down to 73.  Which... shouldn't be a problem.  Was it eating, after not eating for a longer time?  Or have I just become messed up by not having any cool place in the house.  With 73 being the coolest, it just isn't doing.

All I know is I feel very ill.  Green around the gills, as some used to say.  I won't be able to do anything else.  Turning the ac on upstairs, and going on to bed.  I'll leave the ac running downstairs, as well.  I can hope the two, combined, if separated a bit, will help.

It did get down to 66 outside.  That isn't able to get indoors though.  It just, pretty much, doesn't matter.  Yes, on to bed.  Can hope for a better tomorrow.

Wrong.

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I thought I could handle the warmth, heat.  I did, for a while.  Then I absolutely crumbled.  I had to close up the house and put the air on.  With how things are, not even that is helping.  It is 71 outside.  It just won't, of didn't drop.  That may be it.  Now, that... is pretty typical for July, in northern Utah.  That we haven been having that for the last two months is more the thing than else.  Still, it is rough.

I did get food made.  Nothing fancy.  Canned veggies and steak.  The steak was nice, but... still, not fancy.  Once a week, until they are gone.  Though if I see sales on them, in that quality and price range, I'll... jump.  I haven't seen steaks at that price for... ages.  They must have decided making hamburger out of steak just... wasn't paying off?  This admin can push and shove just so much.  When companies start going bankrupt, either they change things up or the new people do.  I... don't think they are willing to follow Biden into the literal or figurative grave.

I think Americans have been crushing companies, al le Bud Light... AB whole, actually.  But the government and other corpos have been fronting the losses.  That doesn't seem to be working anymore.  We'll see.  Can hope they all go bankrupt, from Disney, to AB, to... are any of them not woke?  Hell, Ford, Levi's, and the rest.  All... anti-American.  Not in the big way (or just), but they really do hate Americans.  Who are they, as they really aren't Americans.  Oh, some stooges, but mostly not.  Is that why Germany went against a certain people?  Russia?  I do wonder.

Midafternoon?

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I didn't wake until later.  It was pretty warm out, 87, 88, 90 at the most, if I think of the two lessors.  It was okay down here, 72/75 or so?  Upstairs was 72, with the ac running while I slept.  I turned that off, and left it closed.

Just gaming.  Can't do much else, or yet.  But, life is comfortable.  It even got to, say, 76 in the main, 80 up front?  And I didn't mind.  Very strange.  For most of my adult life, even higher than 72 was terribly uncomfortable.  Couldn't do much about it, but... I suffered.  Now?  I can finally handle higher temps without batting an eye.  So very strange.

With meat thawed, I'll probably get to making something tonight.  A steak?  Burgers?  Who knows.  No buns, no bread, no pasta, but I can do well.  Oh, I do have pasta replacements that aren't too bad.  Now that I have gotten used to them.  Mostly.  I may make a steak, then also fry hamburger crumble... for with keto pasta soon... or on lettuce for a simple taco salad.  Nothing fancy, but it's good.

Great effort to no avail.

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Trash, it seems.  Recycling doesn't look to be this week.  But I couldn't do it.  I stayed up later, hoping I'd... find... a way?  Catch my breath.  Be able to act.  It just didn't happen.  So very tired, and yet I pushed on through.  It's twenty to seven.  I should be asleep, should have been in bed hours ago, many hours ago.

Thankfully there isn't much trash.  There is a lot of recycling, though.  Overflowing, that.  It is what it is.  Monday?  Must be, or I wouldn't have tried to stay up to get the trash out.  I haven't been able to get to mass.  Or the grocery store.  Some thing I was meant to return has timed out.  It's... been rough.

The cool, with the ac, and how I set the house, has been very nice.  But, if I sleep during the day, I'll need the ac on, but just upstairs.  I have closed the house up already.  But only because I am going to bed.  It should stay rather cool.  Especially with the ac running upstairs.

Finally pulled food out.

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Meat, to thaw.  Several packs of burger, two steaks, and some else.  Should last... a week.  But, it will take a day, or two, to thaw.  Still, food is... on the way.

I'll have some kefir.  Then, probably, reset the kefir right then and there.  It should be good.  Late, in resetting it, but it still smells good.  Because it hasn't been getting too warm, it can last a bit longer.  After the kefir, fatted coffee.  It's something.  And, for now, that is... enough.

Wouldn't be bad to lose another ten to fifteen, even twenty, pounds.  Not sure it will happen, not sure what it would take.  Will keep at it.  For... no good reason.  On the good side, my body is tightening back up.  Oh, I still have plenty of fat.  But my internals aren't seemingly loose, squishy, and such, as they were.

Why so late?

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It at 13:15, give or take less than a handful of minutes, when I finally woke in such a manner that I could get out of bed, or for good.  I awoke around 8:34 or something, having to pee.  But had forgotten the clean pee bottles.  So, while getting those, voided while downstairs.  Sort of hoped it would wake me?  No, not 8:34, more like 10:34?  Yes, the later, or a bit later.  But in there.

I closed the windows, save one, and the front door was left a crack open.  Wasn't sure when I'd be up.  Was afraid to close it all up, but didn't want it all open.  When I woke, it was 77 upstairs.  windows were open, remain so.  At this point I don't think it matters, might even be worse to close it up, at least without turning on ac.

I feared for downstairs.  Outdoors is already 88?  Or 90?  And probably going higher.  But, the main was just 72, and the front room is 75 even near the computer since that was off.  I was... impressed.  I truly feared it would be a sweat box by now.  That I would have to... work with it.  When I get too hot, I get a mild fever, often.  As I suggested, perhaps malaria?  Or the reaction to medicine meant to treat it or help fight against it.  If the disease doesn't get you, the medicine may.

Yes, well?

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I didn't do any work.  But I did get the shower, as mentioned.  As well, I got some food heated and down.  Nothing fancy.  It was difficult to eat, but... I really needed some food.  I haven't pulled anything else out yet, but may yet tonight.

Gaming, mostly.  Didn't need to turn any ac on until... like... 20:00, after a bit.  Crazy.  Then I needed just a touch.  Here at 22:30, or that was a bit ago, I checked.  It is cool enough to open up, so I did.  Upstairs is hot, so I put the ac on up there, for a bit as I prepare for bed.

Just have to do that.  It was 77.  Opening the windows, and zipping the fans on high, just wouldn't cool it off enough, up there, to help.

I did get the shower.

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No beard trimming, no shave, no dishes yet... or laundry.  But I feel good?  No energy, but I do feel good.

After drying well enough, I got compression socks on.  Nothing fancy, but it works.  I checked my legs, while at it.  Yes, still... a good deal of water in there.  We'll get back on it.  Though, when weighing in, I am at least below 260 again, at 257.x.  I don't remember what "x" is, just that... it was a number, I believe larger than zero.  I would guess I still have ten pounds of water weight, minimally, in there.  Probably more like twenty.  I'll see about getting that out and managed.  When you can barely stand, doing more is... difficult.

Odd, today.  It is 90 out there.  It is 70/72 down here, 74 near the computer.  I... don't have the ac running?  Very, very strange.  Neither of them.  A few fans.  I opened the window a bit, while showering.  No effect.  Very strange.  I'll take it.  If I only have to run fans, life is good.  But at 90?  After days of the high 80s to low 90s?  It's not like the world cooled off for a bit, then popped up.  Strange.  Gladly take it.

Awake at ten.

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My days are slipping.  Too tired to wake early, staying up just a bit later each night.  In part as heat migrates. In an attempt to make sure I open up to the cool of the night, staying up later is almost required.  Though, last night, it had cooled to at least the low 70s by 21:30.  I could have gone on to bed, but am... stuck in the game.

Midnight, when I went down, no later than two, I should think?  I just can't... remember.  I'll try to get to bed earlier tonight.

I left the door to the downstairs open, and kitteh came up to wake me this morning.  A good thing too, I wouldn't have made it up without my intrepid tiger lily gur cat.  She got a nice body itch and massage out of it, and was allowed to sing her need for food and lovin'.  She is so certain sometimes.  I diminute her, a bit.  But not in seriousness.  Much as I reduce women, at times.  Well, they each have their place, title, tags, and standing.  Though, each, to a man, can be and should be set aside.  Funny thing is, women who believe they are equal either find a man who they consider master and their better... or they live in misery.  Cats... not so much.  :p

Feeling a bit better, day over day.  Still recovering, but hoping to get along a bit more today.  Never took that shower, will shortly.  Then set up dishes.  Laundry will be started in a bit.  I'll... get there.  Then back to gaming, staying cool enough to live, drinking just enough fluid, and maybe sorting some food out for later.

What day is it?  Wednesday?  Cool.  Wait, no... it's... Saturday.  How, mass.  I will try to make it.  No guarantee.  But, starting with a shower, early, may help.  The 15th?  I think, let me... yes.  It's the 15th.  I got half it right, right out of bed.  Good.

Yes, on to a shower.  Trim first, a rest, then a shower?  I will see, might be able to do both, especially with a shower stool in the shower.  Can sit if needed.  And, want to get it done, let my feet dry, so I can put compression socks on again.  I've been going without lately, if, mostly, I haven't been swelling.  With it cooler, I haven't been pounding the water down.

Hmm, a coffee, then a look around, first.  Get my bearings and heart pumping.

Trying to remember...

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When was the last time I was out of the house?  I think it was for a quick run for food, groceries.  Two weeks ago, three?  Five?  I... just can't be certain.  And, it had been weeks before that, and... week before that.  Back to when I was able to make it to church regularly.  Five, eight, ten weeks ago?

I have been pretty done in and down.  But, things really are improving.

No work today.  Nor a shower.  Yet.  I think I'll get a shower before long.  And, probably set up some dishes.  Maybe start a load of laundry.  I'll take the smaller vacuum cleaner upstairs.  It doesn't need a vacuum cleaner bag, so that should be easier.  And, it is much lighter, much more maneuverable.  I'd like to clear the floor, vacuum, and reset the upstairs... in the next few days.