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I finally figured out why I had not been sleeping well at night, or part of it. I had not been looking at the thermometers lately. For a week or so, it was cool enough that simply turning the air conditioner to fan was enough, and sometimes more, to cool the cave comfortably. That has not been the case, it seems, or for a while. When I was initially sickened by the medicine it did not matter. I was burning up when it should have been cool to cold, and besides, I remember little from those fevered days so who knows what was really going on with the temp, a/c, or... anything really. So, I turned on the air conditioner proper just now and I hope to have it cool enough to sleep in an hour.
As I passed through the first three books of the New Testament, I kept running into 'problems'. Some things that did not jive with other things. The contradictions seemed to mount, more so because the first books are very similar tellings of many of the same incidences. I remember having worked most of this out back in my preteen years, and well actually. But I do not remember how I did that. No worries, this did not shake my faith, it just lead me to thought and prayer. And, in time, that has panned out. The subtleties are becoming clarified, the contradictions are not what they seem, and understanding is smoothing out. Still, there is much more to understand, I have many questions, and in time I will revisit many points, with a fuller expectation of spending more time on various parables and writings as literal understandings are not quite possible with what is given, or I note complexity that is slightly hidden, or I am curious about how or why something was phrased as it was.
One example is when Christ suggested that some with Him there would not see death until they saw... the end times, or something like that. I am sleepy, so memory and or word usage fails a bit. I took from that Christ was saying some of those there with Him should still be alive, of flesh, and will remain so until He returns. It is written several different ways in those first three books, but they lean toward what I have written. Oh, and there are many other items of interest and intrigue.
Hmm, I am hungry again. I could not eat much today, it was simply too warm. My stomach goes on strike, if I do attempt to put token amounts of sustenance in the bio-machine anyway. I am getting somewhat low on food and money, and yet have a big ISP bill and a trip to the SLC VA, for which I will just as likely not be directly or immediately (if at all) compensated. Yeah, I know, I am very lucky to be compensated for traveling to a free medical vender at all. Now, too, I use the term free. Free as in, it only cost me my mind. :P Nothing is really free. Meh, I was probably out of my mind anyway. I did, after all, join the N.A.V.Y. (never again volunteer yourself). *grins* But I did like the Navy and am simply disappointed I could not turn it into a career. Beside all the other nuts and kooks, there was a world to see, interesting things to do, and a rank ladder to climb. I would certainly give up the free medical and money to have been able to do that. Even if I am getting, comparatively, a fortune, and have all the free time I want. Yep, I am crazy!
Being a weekend, I cannot do business tomorrow. I should be able to buy some food items though, which will hopefully last the rest of the month. I had best be wearing my thinking cap or I will end up with odds and ends and little in the way of meal settings. Peanut butter without bread, cereal without milk, yeah, I do that from time to time. Often more frequently than can be explained by random dumb luck.
Well, back to it. I just thought I would leave a note to self. Self, turn on the air conditioner by at least 19:00 so by 22:00 or 23:00 you can sleep! Doh! By the way, self, did we not just have this conversation not that long ago? Why, yes we did. Doh!
Good night, Mary Lou. (I know, a repeat, but I like Mary Lou, a lot.) I think I did, or was that Mary Beth, Mary Ann, or... I liked them all, actually, mostly, probably... *sigh*
One example is when Christ suggested that some with Him there would not see death until they saw... the end times, or something like that.
ReplyDeleteIn regards to this, you read this at Matthew 16:27-28 For the Son of Man will come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and then He will reward each according to his works. Assuredly, I say to you, there are some standing here who shall not taste death till they see the Son of Man coming in His kingdom.
Mark 9:1 words it a little differently (crucially so, in my estimation): And he said to them, "I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the kingdom of God come with power."
Six days later (Matthew 17, Mark 9) is the first and partial fulfillment of this saying. Three of his disciples did indeed see him in the splendor and glory of his coming kingdom.
But more importantly, what of tasting death? Do any of us who are in Him taste death? Though our mortal bodies perish, do we descend into the land of the dead after? The scriptures inform us that we do not. He tasted death for us, so that when we die, when we are "absent from the body", we are then "present with the Lord".
On the cross, the Lord said to the thief who believed, "I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise!"
Bane wrote an excellent fictional piece about a woman dying in a fiery car crash. At the moment of her demise, the attending Angel of the Lord took hold of her and brought her out to stand next to him. I thought it to be a very insightful depiction. How much more terrifying is it for the lost, who finding themselves bereft of corporeal form descend, descend into the pit of hades...
Yep, I figured that was more like it, but I will be connecting the dots myself as much as possible. And, most "confusions" are such. Still, there really are things which will not be answered so lightly. And, for me, that is part of the enjoyment. Not that the bible was written as a mystery, though it certainly leaves some serious ones to contemplate.
ReplyDeleteSome say the signs, miracles, and resurrections were based on faith. But I ask you, are you not faithful? If you say yes, then I ask, why have you not moved a mountain or transplanted a tree or bush to be rooted under the sea? You see my problem, Christ suggested that if we had the most small grain of faith, we could do these things. Then again, if we do have that faith (and I think there are some number of us who truly do), we would only be moved by the Holy Spirit to do these things at God's bidding, for His purposes. Men, otherwise, would do durned fool things left to our own. (How about buying an acre and stretching into a mountain lodge beach front property about 50 miles for anywhere (and prime fishing and hunting grounds to boot). *grins* Oh, and only a 2 minute walk and drive (somehow) for the owner and family to whatever resource is needed, but a 10 hour trip (one way) for anyone not welcome, and if too unwelcome, they could never find you. Ha.
Now, my take on that is that a grain of faith would allow it, but it would have have been the Father's will that the mountain be moved or the tree transplanted whole. And all destruction of evil doers, once and for all or even to some extent individually, seems to have been set aside for God alone, both by those who profess and those who agress evil.
Then again, I have learned (and I absolutely believe it) that one cannot takes one's own life without God allowing it. His will is still good. After running into the wall of His will, and after finally realizing he was holding me in Hand and staying my death, I could have outright rejected Him and He might have allowed it, but... something changed me when I realized, that like a bird in the hand of a man, I was being tended and ministered. How big that hand. Now I know the worth and value of the gift that is life and the valuelessness of pride. Humbled and at ease, even as I struggle with things, I know who my Lord and Master is.
Still, many mysteries. I think that we seek is enough, for we cannot every truly know, or know all. Even Christ said He could not do so, limited by His fleshly form. Seek and you will find, pray and it will be given. Time means nothing to God, or to our faith. Think about it, no need for calculus classes! *grins*
Good-bye Mary Lou, Good bye heart...
ReplyDelete(Rick Nelson).
you're welcome *g*
Jean,
ReplyDeleteOh, yeah. Okay, now I still don't remember. But I would if I heard it. It is awful getting old and forgetting everything. I really hope ignorance is bliss because I am getting there quickly (and happily?).