The next opportunity.

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Every day is the next opportunity. At least in a bigger picture short term way. Some nights, and even whole days, I fear falling, failing, or even succeeding. Some days, when I crawl into bed, I have more hounds of doubt and fear both their numbers and even any particular one of their ferocity. Too much to do, I do not know how to do any of it sometimes it seems, and there are no easy answers or helpful people to guide or instruct. I seem to making things up whole clothe to do too much of what I am doing. I am not even certain where my finances sit until the bills... for everything... begin to roll in. Not fun. And yet, quite often, with a nightly prayer, a shutting off of the day as I lay my very weary head in spite of nothing having been done, and then some sleep, I get my next chance every morning.

This morning, Sam woke me to let me know she thought outside sounded more fun than inside. Hmm, glasses I thought? Who cares. I just wobbled through the bedroom, living room, kitchen, and then down the hall to the door and fumbled with the locks until the door opened. Then back the return rout to bed, looking at the clock on the way. It was 8:45. I thought the alarm was set to go off at 9:00, but checked. Yep. I simply reset it for a 10:00, seeming quite tired still. And yet, after moments back in bed, I simply got up, turned off the alarm, and started my morning news and blog routine.

Now, as I wake further, plans are beginning to form. I twist the Dyna-Flex, mostly in my wounded hand, but to give it a break also in my good hand. That cranky finger is getting more flexibility back, and strength too. My ability to use it more fully is returning. It will be a while on this, that is the most severe wound I have had in a long while. Still, pushing through the rehab and reading the news, my nearly subconscious mind is thinking about what is to be done, when, and how. As I wake, that background comes more to the fore and I begin developing a plan for the day, or usually. Today I have not yet developed a plan. I merely know what is on my lists of recent days that has gone undone. The bed, the tax rebate, and clearing the boxes. Other things start to ring a bell, dishes, perhaps some laundry (which brings my mind to the fact that I would like to set up a chorus of clothes lines), and that I want to revisit city hall.

And, today, I am pretty sure I will get to some of that. I might get to all of it. I might even get to more of it. When I get busy and go places with my mind and will back in place as if sleep acted on them like my chiropractor functions on my spine, things pop. And, today, possibly, is one of those days. Wasting a crisis? Sure use it as a learning experience, nothing more. Governments do not make money so opportunizing a crisis only costs us and usually in very bad ways. But an opportunity, that is something that should not be flushed. Capitalizing, turning lemons into lemonade, on the next chance is what all life truly is about. Which, in stated truth, means less government and more self. So, it is time for self.

Lots of farm animals can be heard in the mornings here. I know there is a rooster, geese I believe, lambs or goats, horses, mourning doves (which I do not actually appreciate but my mom will love), and some... other animals yet to be identified. I would guess the others are fowl of some sort, though cannot swear to it. It makes such a rich medley for the ears each morning, like breakfast for the mind. As for waking me up... If they can, they are welcome to it. I really am in the right place. Oh, and farm smells. Feed, droppings, the animals themselves... also a plus. Perhaps, truly, I am provincial. I take that as a compliment, if too I know I do not quite fit in here either. It, at this point, is merely sentiment on my part. It is not my way of life. Even should I go down that road to an extent, I will never even be able to be a farmer. If that is never always needed or even the point. I am a stranger at home, but quite happy to be home.

Well, I best do a bit more waking, maybe put the bed together, then shower and see if city hall is doable. Good day.